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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162 WWW.MY-SUBS.CO 1 00:00:01,868 --> 00:00:03,868 Morning... 2 00:00:03,901 --> 00:00:05,234 Sir.. 3 00:00:05,267 --> 00:00:06,834 Good morning, Caitlin.. 4 00:00:11,801 --> 00:00:13,267 Mr. mayor. 5 00:00:13,300 --> 00:00:14,601 Carter.. 6 00:00:17,334 --> 00:00:19,167 Morning, everyone.. 7 00:00:19,200 --> 00:00:21,167 Morning. Morning.. 8 00:00:21,200 --> 00:00:22,934 Sir.. 9 00:00:22,968 --> 00:00:26,200 So, we're not talking about the mayor's outfit?. 10 00:00:26,234 --> 00:00:28,934 What's wrong with it?. 11 00:00:28,968 --> 00:00:30,801 Nothing.... 12 00:00:30,834 --> 00:00:33,634 If you're selling customized vans. 13 00:00:33,667 --> 00:00:35,300 I ran out of clean clothes.. 14 00:00:35,334 --> 00:00:37,434 My housekeeper of 20 years quit last week.. 15 00:00:37,467 --> 00:00:39,234 All she left was a note saying, 16 00:00:39,267 --> 00:00:41,901 "goodbye, Randall. You're out of paper towels and ajax.". 17 00:00:41,934 --> 00:00:44,968 Don't worry, sir... we'll find you someone else right away.. 18 00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:48,033 Oh, look... one of my old business cards.. 19 00:00:50,167 --> 00:00:53,467 "Randy Winston, capricorn." . 20 00:00:53,501 --> 00:00:56,167 It was just a gag.. 21 00:00:58,167 --> 00:00:59,267 Hey.... 22 00:00:59,300 --> 00:01:01,067 What's your sign?. 23 00:01:01,100 --> 00:01:02,133 Aries.. 24 00:01:02,167 --> 00:01:03,934 Ooh, perfect.. 25 00:01:31,734 --> 00:01:35,234 I don't need excuses, Phil. I need those runways cleared.. 26 00:01:35,267 --> 00:01:37,501 You know, 6 months ago when you started... 27 00:01:37,534 --> 00:01:40,634 you get those snowplows out to the airport now, 28 00:01:40,667 --> 00:01:43,701 or I'm going to give 20,000 stranded travelers 29 00:01:43,734 --> 00:01:45,367 your home phone number.. 30 00:01:45,400 --> 00:01:48,000 You know, Charlie, 6 months ago when you... 31 00:01:48,033 --> 00:01:50,000 councilman Phillips wants approval 32 00:01:50,033 --> 00:01:51,434 for a new office park.. 33 00:01:51,467 --> 00:01:53,300 Tell that blowhard he'll get approval 34 00:01:53,334 --> 00:01:55,367 when he backs the low-income housing plan.. 35 00:01:55,400 --> 00:01:56,501 Ahem.... 36 00:01:56,534 --> 00:01:58,067 You know, Charlie... 37 00:01:58,100 --> 00:01:59,067 ah. 38 00:01:59,100 --> 00:02:02,033 6 months ago when I started here.... 39 00:02:03,868 --> 00:02:06,100 Go on.. 40 00:02:06,133 --> 00:02:08,834 That's where you left off.. 41 00:02:08,868 --> 00:02:11,367 Ah, yes... 6 months ago... When you... 42 00:02:11,400 --> 00:02:14,000 I had my doubts... a lot of people did.. 43 00:02:14,033 --> 00:02:17,100 They said that you threw away a promising career.. 44 00:02:17,133 --> 00:02:18,834 They said you were washed up.. 45 00:02:18,868 --> 00:02:20,334 They said you were a loser.. 46 00:02:20,367 --> 00:02:22,300 Who are these people?. 47 00:02:22,334 --> 00:02:23,968 And you proved them wrong, 48 00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:26,934 so as a small token of my gratitude, 49 00:02:26,968 --> 00:02:28,968 I'd like you to have this.. 50 00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:30,467 I... sir.... 51 00:02:30,501 --> 00:02:33,033 That's your Sandy koufax autographed baseball.. 52 00:02:33,067 --> 00:02:34,701 I-I can't accept that. 53 00:02:34,734 --> 00:02:36,734 I know how much you admire it. 54 00:02:36,767 --> 00:02:38,367 I want you to have it.. 55 00:02:40,701 --> 00:02:42,901 I don't know what to say.. 56 00:02:42,934 --> 00:02:44,968 You just keep up the good work.. 57 00:02:45,000 --> 00:02:46,534 Oh, and by the way, 58 00:02:46,567 --> 00:02:49,267 thanks for finding me a suit on such short notice. 59 00:02:49,300 --> 00:02:51,868 I can be pretty resourceful when I need to be. 60 00:02:51,901 --> 00:02:53,734 I'm sorry I'm late.. 61 00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:05,100 Do you realize this ball is from koufax's perfect game in '65?. 62 00:03:05,133 --> 00:03:06,767 What's the big deal?. 63 00:03:06,801 --> 00:03:09,534 It's just a baseball.. 64 00:03:09,567 --> 00:03:12,067 It's worth $15,000.. 65 00:03:12,100 --> 00:03:14,434 It's so beautiful.. 66 00:03:14,467 --> 00:03:16,200 Hey, Charlie!. 67 00:03:16,234 --> 00:03:18,334 Up for the big poker game tonight?. 68 00:03:18,367 --> 00:03:19,901 Sorry, I got plans.. 69 00:03:19,934 --> 00:03:22,033 You always have plans on poker night. 70 00:03:22,067 --> 00:03:25,033 I get it... you just don't want to hang out with us.. 71 00:03:25,067 --> 00:03:27,701 What's the matter... we too nerdy?. 72 00:03:27,734 --> 00:03:30,100 Too unskilled with the ladies?. 73 00:03:30,133 --> 00:03:31,934 Does it embarrass you 74 00:03:31,968 --> 00:03:35,000 when we steal rolls in restaurants?. 75 00:03:35,033 --> 00:03:36,701 No, that's not it.. 76 00:03:36,734 --> 00:03:38,734 What is it?. 77 00:03:38,767 --> 00:03:40,667 It's nothing. Where's the game?. 78 00:03:42,234 --> 00:03:44,801 It's at my place, isn't it? 79 00:03:44,834 --> 00:03:46,968 8:00. See ya there, Chuck.. 80 00:03:47,000 --> 00:03:48,634 Ball!. 81 00:03:50,033 --> 00:03:52,000 Just one night of poker with the guys.... 82 00:03:52,033 --> 00:03:53,300 No big deal.. 83 00:03:53,334 --> 00:03:54,701 Why would it be?. 84 00:03:54,734 --> 00:03:57,200 Well, I used to have a little problem with gambling.. 85 00:03:57,234 --> 00:03:58,868 Define "little." 86 00:03:58,901 --> 00:04:00,400 I'd get carried away, 87 00:04:00,434 --> 00:04:02,400 and then so would most of my furniture.. 88 00:04:02,434 --> 00:04:05,767 Why don't you just tell them? They'll understand.. 89 00:04:05,801 --> 00:04:07,767 It means a lot to them if I hang out with them.. 90 00:04:07,801 --> 00:04:09,767 Besides, I got it under control. 91 00:04:09,801 --> 00:04:12,601 I'm gonna sit there, purposely lose a couple of hands, 92 00:04:12,634 --> 00:04:14,400 drink a few beers, and that's it.. 93 00:04:14,434 --> 00:04:17,234 Is there any vice you haven't indulged in?. 94 00:04:31,067 --> 00:04:33,167 What are you doing?!. 95 00:04:33,200 --> 00:04:36,701 Microwaving my coffee, like the can-do guy that I am.. 96 00:04:36,734 --> 00:04:38,901 Did you leave a spoon in there or something?. 97 00:04:42,067 --> 00:04:44,467 Nope, we're okay.. 98 00:04:44,501 --> 00:04:47,000 Sir, you are too busy to be doing this.. 99 00:04:47,033 --> 00:04:49,300 We really have to find you a new housekeeper.. 100 00:04:49,334 --> 00:04:52,400 Nonsense! Losing my housekeeper was a blessing in disguise.. 101 00:04:52,434 --> 00:04:54,834 It's high time I became more self-sufficient.. 102 00:04:54,868 --> 00:04:57,734 Remember the time you tried to mow your own lawn?. 103 00:04:57,767 --> 00:05:00,901 Poor little squirrel never saw it coming.. 104 00:05:00,934 --> 00:05:04,267 Well, at least have someone show you the ropes.. 105 00:05:04,300 --> 00:05:06,267 What a generous offer, Caitlin.. 106 00:05:06,300 --> 00:05:09,300 We can start by grocery shopping tonight after work.. 107 00:05:09,334 --> 00:05:10,367 Me?!. 108 00:05:10,400 --> 00:05:12,300 Come on... it'll be fun.. 109 00:05:14,100 --> 00:05:16,467 Bacon's ready. 110 00:05:34,901 --> 00:05:36,167 Paul!. 111 00:05:36,200 --> 00:05:38,067 Are you in or out?!. 112 00:05:38,100 --> 00:05:40,100 What's the pot up to? 113 00:05:40,133 --> 00:05:42,000 85 cents.. 114 00:05:42,033 --> 00:05:44,601 The bet's a dime to you. 115 00:05:45,701 --> 00:05:47,334 I'm in. 116 00:05:47,367 --> 00:05:50,667 Paul, recyclables are only worth a nickel!. 117 00:05:50,701 --> 00:05:54,133 It's a dime in Vermont!. 118 00:05:55,501 --> 00:05:57,467 I got 3 Jacks. Anybody beat that?. 119 00:05:57,501 --> 00:05:58,467 No.. 120 00:05:58,501 --> 00:05:59,934 Yeah! Come to papa! 121 00:05:59,968 --> 00:06:02,467 I'm gettin' a pack of gum on the way home, 122 00:06:02,501 --> 00:06:05,200 and guess what... you guys are payin' for it!. 123 00:06:05,234 --> 00:06:06,667 All right, my deal. 124 00:06:06,701 --> 00:06:09,133 5-card draw is the game.. 125 00:06:14,567 --> 00:06:17,267 Uh-oh. Oh, um.... 126 00:06:17,300 --> 00:06:18,901 Oh, boy.. 127 00:06:18,934 --> 00:06:21,234 Oh, I have a terrible hand. 128 00:06:21,267 --> 00:06:24,167 I should fold. I should fo... 129 00:06:24,200 --> 00:06:27,067 you know what? No... I'm gonna play just for fun, 130 00:06:27,100 --> 00:06:29,200 even though I'm probably gonna lose.. 131 00:06:29,234 --> 00:06:30,934 Anyone got a read on Paul?. 132 00:06:35,501 --> 00:06:36,534 Cards? 133 00:06:36,567 --> 00:06:37,634 I'm good. 134 00:06:37,667 --> 00:06:39,601 I'll take 3.. 135 00:06:40,701 --> 00:06:43,634 Not much to work with here. Give me 4.. 136 00:06:43,667 --> 00:06:46,801 And the dealer takes 3.. 137 00:06:48,434 --> 00:06:51,400 The bet's to you, Charlie.. 138 00:06:51,434 --> 00:06:53,968 Fold.. 139 00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:56,067 You've been folding all night. 140 00:06:56,100 --> 00:06:57,734 I'm just not getting good cards.. 141 00:06:57,767 --> 00:07:00,767 The cry of an amateur... you don't need good cards to win.. 142 00:07:00,801 --> 00:07:03,667 Maybe this is why Charlie doesn't play poker with us.. 143 00:07:03,701 --> 00:07:06,367 Maybe he doesn't have the stomach for a big game.. 144 00:07:07,734 --> 00:07:11,434 You afraid to dance with the devil?. 145 00:07:16,601 --> 00:07:18,100 Bet's $100. 146 00:07:18,133 --> 00:07:19,534 I'm out.. 147 00:07:19,567 --> 00:07:20,567 Me too. 148 00:07:20,601 --> 00:07:22,434 I think you're bluffing.... 149 00:07:22,467 --> 00:07:26,100 And my emergency Ben Franklin.... 150 00:07:26,133 --> 00:07:28,033 Says you got nothin'.. 151 00:07:29,434 --> 00:07:30,734 Full house. 152 00:07:30,767 --> 00:07:33,033 4 aces.. 153 00:07:33,067 --> 00:07:35,200 Oh, God! Oh, my God!. 154 00:07:35,234 --> 00:07:37,567 Oh, God, I'm gonna be sick!. 155 00:07:37,601 --> 00:07:39,267 Oh, God!. 156 00:07:39,300 --> 00:07:41,100 Well, it's gettin' kind of late. 157 00:07:41,133 --> 00:07:42,834 I'll walk back with you.. 158 00:07:42,868 --> 00:07:46,400 Hey, hey, hey... sit down.. 159 00:07:56,100 --> 00:07:57,901 Let's play some cards.. 160 00:08:01,334 --> 00:08:04,434 Here's the deli. Now, um, pick a number.. 161 00:08:04,467 --> 00:08:06,501 Uh... 16.. 162 00:08:06,534 --> 00:08:09,334 No, sir, from here.. 163 00:08:09,367 --> 00:08:10,934 Oh, sorry.. 164 00:08:10,968 --> 00:08:12,868 What can I get you? 165 00:08:12,901 --> 00:08:15,300 I'd like some roast beef, please.. 166 00:08:15,334 --> 00:08:17,033 How much?. 167 00:08:17,067 --> 00:08:19,467 E-enough for a whole week... I'll take 25 pounds.. 168 00:08:19,501 --> 00:08:21,334 He'll take one pound cut extra lean, 169 00:08:21,367 --> 00:08:23,701 and a pound of smoked Turkey. 170 00:08:23,734 --> 00:08:26,033 I'm impressed. You're a natural at helping.. 171 00:08:26,067 --> 00:08:27,834 You really think so?. 172 00:08:27,868 --> 00:08:29,334 Yeah, of course.. 173 00:08:29,367 --> 00:08:31,300 Let's hit the frozen-food section.. 174 00:08:31,334 --> 00:08:33,334 Great! I'm starting to get the hang of this.. 175 00:08:33,367 --> 00:08:34,901 Mini cheese pocket?. 176 00:08:34,934 --> 00:08:36,434 Oh, yes, thank you.. 177 00:08:45,567 --> 00:08:47,601 It's after 10:00. Where's Charlie?. 178 00:08:47,634 --> 00:08:49,934 He's probably out buying a new wardrobe 179 00:08:49,968 --> 00:08:52,067 with all the money he took from me. 180 00:08:52,100 --> 00:08:53,601 $100? 181 00:08:53,634 --> 00:08:56,901 Lord knows what he's doing with the rest of it.. 182 00:08:56,934 --> 00:08:58,667 What are you doing?. 183 00:08:58,701 --> 00:09:00,334 Organizing the mayor's vitamins. 184 00:09:00,367 --> 00:09:02,334 I want to make sure he gets enough "c" 185 00:09:02,367 --> 00:09:04,234 since it's flu-and-cold season.. 186 00:09:04,267 --> 00:09:06,267 Oh, and look at this cute scarf I got him.. 187 00:09:06,300 --> 00:09:07,834 Looks like someone's 188 00:09:07,868 --> 00:09:10,100 getting in touch with their nurturing side.. 189 00:09:10,133 --> 00:09:11,167 What?. 190 00:09:11,200 --> 00:09:12,968 My sister went through the same thing.. 191 00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:15,834 She bought a hamster... she started knitting it 192 00:09:15,868 --> 00:09:18,434 little outfits and purses, and then it got weird. 193 00:09:18,467 --> 00:09:20,100 Caitlin, I need your help.. 194 00:09:20,133 --> 00:09:21,601 What can I do? 195 00:09:21,634 --> 00:09:24,000 I've decided that being self-sufficient 196 00:09:24,033 --> 00:09:26,400 is both stupid and dangerous, 197 00:09:26,434 --> 00:09:29,267 so I need you to help me find a new housekeeper.. 198 00:09:29,300 --> 00:09:30,801 Aren't I doing a good job?. 199 00:09:30,834 --> 00:09:33,701 You're doing great. I just need someone full time.. 200 00:09:33,734 --> 00:09:34,901 Fine.. 201 00:09:34,934 --> 00:09:36,601 Whatever.. 202 00:09:36,634 --> 00:09:39,734 Oh, that's a nice scarf.. 203 00:09:39,767 --> 00:09:41,567 This for me?. 204 00:09:41,601 --> 00:09:42,734 No!. 205 00:09:42,767 --> 00:09:44,400 It's Angie's.. 206 00:09:44,434 --> 00:09:46,834 But it says "the mayor." . 207 00:09:46,868 --> 00:09:49,934 Well, that's her nickname.. 208 00:09:51,167 --> 00:09:53,868 Well, this is gonna be confusing.. 209 00:09:53,901 --> 00:09:56,767 Good morning, gentlemen.. 210 00:09:56,801 --> 00:09:57,868 Morning, sir. Morning.. 211 00:09:57,901 --> 00:09:59,534 We missed you at poker last night. 212 00:09:59,567 --> 00:10:02,000 I think we should come up with a different activity 213 00:10:02,033 --> 00:10:04,534 besides poker... 'cause of Charlie's problem.. 214 00:10:04,567 --> 00:10:06,000 What problem?. 215 00:10:06,033 --> 00:10:09,067 He has a terrible history with gambling.. 216 00:10:09,100 --> 00:10:10,767 Thank God it's all behind him.. 217 00:10:13,100 --> 00:10:14,934 Nice goin', Paul!. 218 00:10:14,968 --> 00:10:17,133 Poker night was your idea!. 219 00:10:17,167 --> 00:10:18,434 Hey... 220 00:10:18,467 --> 00:10:20,434 guys! There's no problem.. 221 00:10:20,467 --> 00:10:22,934 It was just one harmless, little game of poker, 222 00:10:22,968 --> 00:10:24,634 so let's not point fingers. 223 00:10:24,667 --> 00:10:26,167 Angie... 224 00:10:29,300 --> 00:10:32,133 get me 2 cups of coffee, today's racing form, 225 00:10:32,167 --> 00:10:34,801 and the point spread on tonight's ucla game.. 226 00:10:34,834 --> 00:10:37,934 Nice going, Paul!. 227 00:10:43,567 --> 00:10:46,968 I was just at the meeting... Charlie never showed up.. 228 00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:49,033 He's in trouble, and it's all our fault.. 229 00:10:49,067 --> 00:10:51,100 He's in trouble?! I just lost 100 bucks, 230 00:10:51,133 --> 00:10:53,667 and it's renewal time for my magazine subscriptions.. 231 00:10:53,701 --> 00:10:54,767 Hey, guys.. 232 00:10:54,801 --> 00:10:56,033 Hey, Charlie.. 233 00:10:56,067 --> 00:10:58,701 We wanted to apologize for last night.. 234 00:10:58,734 --> 00:11:01,567 We didn't know about your history with gambling. 235 00:11:01,601 --> 00:11:04,367 I think the best way to rectify the situation 236 00:11:04,400 --> 00:11:06,801 is if everybody returns their winnings.. 237 00:11:08,100 --> 00:11:10,567 We're even.. 238 00:11:10,601 --> 00:11:13,767 Guys, I appreciate your concern, but there's no problem here.. 239 00:11:13,801 --> 00:11:16,567 There's a Eddie on the phone... he says Philly covered.. 240 00:11:17,634 --> 00:11:20,200 He's from the deli.. 241 00:11:20,234 --> 00:11:24,234 He got the Philly cream cheese to cover the entire bagel. 242 00:11:26,033 --> 00:11:28,033 Eddie, I want to put in my lunch order... 243 00:11:28,067 --> 00:11:29,801 I love your buffalo wings, 244 00:11:29,834 --> 00:11:32,601 and your Boston clam chowder's been on a roll, 245 00:11:32,634 --> 00:11:34,234 so give me Boston, 246 00:11:34,267 --> 00:11:36,801 and for dessert, I'll take the Knicks.. 247 00:11:39,467 --> 00:11:42,067 Wow, it's even worse than I thought. 248 00:11:42,100 --> 00:11:43,467 I know!. 249 00:11:43,501 --> 00:11:46,467 Not only is he a gambler... he's a binge eater!. 250 00:11:48,834 --> 00:11:50,801 We've interviewed 9 housekeepers, 251 00:11:50,834 --> 00:11:52,634 and you've turned them all down.. 252 00:11:52,667 --> 00:11:54,868 Sir, none of those applicants were qualified.. 253 00:11:54,901 --> 00:11:56,701 Well, we have to hire someone, 254 00:11:56,734 --> 00:11:58,934 and if that means I have to settle 255 00:11:58,968 --> 00:12:01,667 for the "former Butler to the prime minister of France," 256 00:12:01,701 --> 00:12:03,133 then so be it.. 257 00:12:03,167 --> 00:12:04,767 Hi, I'm Edith connelly. 258 00:12:04,801 --> 00:12:07,200 I'm here to interview for the housekeeper position.. 259 00:12:07,234 --> 00:12:09,300 Come in, Ms. connelly. Sit down.. 260 00:12:09,334 --> 00:12:11,567 Tell us a little bit about yourself.. 261 00:12:11,601 --> 00:12:13,334 Well, my previous position 262 00:12:13,367 --> 00:12:16,033 was with a very prominent English barrister.. 263 00:12:16,067 --> 00:12:18,901 Isn't "barrister" just a fancy way of saying "lawyer"? 264 00:12:18,934 --> 00:12:21,267 I suppose so.. 265 00:12:21,300 --> 00:12:22,534 Pompous. 266 00:12:22,567 --> 00:12:24,534 I managed all of his household affairs 267 00:12:24,567 --> 00:12:26,033 for 20 years.. 268 00:12:26,067 --> 00:12:27,901 Unfortunately, I had to leave 269 00:12:27,934 --> 00:12:29,901 to take care of my ailing mother.. 270 00:12:29,934 --> 00:12:32,534 Quitter.. 271 00:12:32,567 --> 00:12:35,267 Well, I think we've covered everything.. 272 00:12:35,300 --> 00:12:37,400 Thank you for coming in.. 273 00:12:37,434 --> 00:12:40,901 It was a pleasure meeting both of you.. 274 00:12:40,934 --> 00:12:44,000 What a bitch!. 275 00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:49,367 I can hear Charlie in there.. 276 00:12:49,400 --> 00:12:52,734 Now, let's go confront him about his gambling problem. 277 00:12:52,767 --> 00:12:54,701 Paul, what's in there?. 278 00:12:54,734 --> 00:12:56,701 A Bible and some holy water.. 279 00:12:56,734 --> 00:12:59,601 This is an intervention, not an exorcism.. 280 00:13:00,701 --> 00:13:04,200 If you're at a loss, refer to these cards.. 281 00:13:04,234 --> 00:13:07,000 The way we announce ourselves is critical. 282 00:13:07,033 --> 00:13:08,501 I'm gonna say, . 283 00:13:08,534 --> 00:13:11,133 "Charlie, it's Carter, Stuart, and Paul, 284 00:13:11,167 --> 00:13:13,133 and we need to talk.". 285 00:13:13,167 --> 00:13:15,467 Wait... that's confusing.. 286 00:13:15,501 --> 00:13:17,934 It sounds like w need to talk.. 287 00:13:17,968 --> 00:13:21,100 Why would we stand outside his door and talk to each other?. 288 00:13:21,133 --> 00:13:23,400 We're doing that now.. 289 00:13:23,434 --> 00:13:25,801 Getting on the other side of that door 290 00:13:25,834 --> 00:13:27,601 is not gonna be easy.. 291 00:13:27,634 --> 00:13:29,400 It's going to require 292 00:13:29,434 --> 00:13:32,234 all of my guile, cunning, and intellect.. 293 00:13:32,267 --> 00:13:34,267 You guys want to come in?. 294 00:13:36,267 --> 00:13:38,200 Bingo! 295 00:13:38,234 --> 00:13:40,901 Charlie, we need to speak with you 296 00:13:40,934 --> 00:13:42,901 about your gambling problem.. 297 00:13:42,934 --> 00:13:46,267 Gambling is just a hobby. I find it relaxing.. 298 00:13:46,300 --> 00:13:48,801 Lemieux shoots! He scores!. 299 00:13:48,834 --> 00:13:51,434 Son of a... you call yourself a goalie?!. 300 00:13:51,467 --> 00:13:53,000 You fat bastard!. 301 00:13:53,033 --> 00:13:55,100 This is an intervention... places, everyone!. 302 00:13:55,133 --> 00:13:57,267 Don't you guys have anything better to do? 303 00:13:57,300 --> 00:13:59,400 Stuart, I thought you had Knicks tickets. 304 00:13:59,434 --> 00:14:02,400 I'd rather be here.. 305 00:14:03,734 --> 00:14:06,033 Besides, the Lakers are gonna kill 'em. 306 00:14:06,067 --> 00:14:08,167 50 bucks says you're wrong. You're on. 307 00:14:08,200 --> 00:14:09,801 I'll take a piece... 308 00:14:09,834 --> 00:14:11,033 guys!. 309 00:14:11,067 --> 00:14:12,534 Focus!. 310 00:14:12,567 --> 00:14:15,367 Step one... Paul, tell Charlie how much you care about him. 311 00:14:15,400 --> 00:14:17,767 Charlie, no matter what happens, 312 00:14:17,801 --> 00:14:19,434 I want you to know 313 00:14:19,467 --> 00:14:22,434 to "add ground beef, cover, and simmer.". 314 00:14:22,467 --> 00:14:26,167 Damn! That's my chili recipe!. 315 00:14:26,200 --> 00:14:28,868 Guys, I know you mean well, but I'm fine.. 316 00:14:28,901 --> 00:14:32,033 So if you would just calm down, jagr's about to score.. 317 00:14:32,067 --> 00:14:34,033 Man: He shoots! He scores!. 318 00:14:34,067 --> 00:14:36,434 You're killing me, you mullet-headed Czech! 319 00:14:36,467 --> 00:14:38,033 Stuart, step two.. 320 00:14:41,701 --> 00:14:44,334 Can't you see what you're doing to yourself?!. 321 00:14:44,367 --> 00:14:45,868 Wake up!. 322 00:14:45,901 --> 00:14:47,801 You've got a problem!. 323 00:14:47,834 --> 00:14:49,968 That's step three, you idiot!. 324 00:14:50,000 --> 00:14:52,033 Don't you call me an idiot!. 325 00:14:52,067 --> 00:14:53,534 You have no idea!. 326 00:14:53,567 --> 00:14:55,701 Stop it! Stop it!. 327 00:14:55,734 --> 00:14:58,467 This is one lame intervention.. 328 00:14:58,501 --> 00:15:00,367 Stop it!. 329 00:15:02,934 --> 00:15:04,467 Mr. mayor.. 330 00:15:04,501 --> 00:15:06,033 Mr. mayor. 331 00:15:14,167 --> 00:15:16,501 I've always had a knack for reading people, 332 00:15:16,534 --> 00:15:19,868 and I have a feeling there's something going on with you. 333 00:15:19,901 --> 00:15:21,033 I'm fine.. 334 00:15:21,067 --> 00:15:23,200 Okay, just checking.. 335 00:15:23,234 --> 00:15:24,400 Wait!. 336 00:15:24,434 --> 00:15:25,968 You're right. 337 00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:29,067 I overreacted about you hiring that housekeeper 338 00:15:29,100 --> 00:15:32,534 because I was really enjoying taking care of someone.. 339 00:15:32,567 --> 00:15:35,567 Lately, I've been so focused on my career and myself 340 00:15:35,601 --> 00:15:39,701 that helping you reminded me of what I was missing. 341 00:15:39,734 --> 00:15:41,701 I think I understand.. 342 00:15:41,734 --> 00:15:45,200 Since my divorce, and my daughter's all grown up, 343 00:15:45,234 --> 00:15:47,200 I often feel a void.. 344 00:15:47,234 --> 00:15:49,467 But it comforts me to think 345 00:15:49,501 --> 00:15:51,234 that I help take care 346 00:15:51,267 --> 00:15:54,667 of each and every one of the citizens of this city.. 347 00:15:54,701 --> 00:15:57,067 Mr. mayor, my daughter has always wanted to meet you.. 348 00:15:57,100 --> 00:15:58,567 Not now.. 349 00:16:00,300 --> 00:16:03,100 You make $10 million a year! How can you miss a free throw?. 350 00:16:03,133 --> 00:16:05,501 Tell me about it... it's like the time 351 00:16:05,534 --> 00:16:07,801 I lost a bundle on that basketball game.. 352 00:16:07,834 --> 00:16:10,834 You bet against the globetrotters.. 353 00:16:10,868 --> 00:16:13,934 Can you two wait outside? I need to talk to Charlie.. 354 00:16:19,467 --> 00:16:23,267 Look, I know this hasn't been a perfect intervention.. 355 00:16:23,300 --> 00:16:24,968 Hey, it's been great, 356 00:16:25,033 --> 00:16:27,501 especially when Paul doused me with holy water.. 357 00:16:30,133 --> 00:16:31,467 Hello?. 358 00:16:31,501 --> 00:16:32,968 They lost?. 359 00:16:33,000 --> 00:16:34,634 Aw, damn it!. 360 00:16:34,667 --> 00:16:37,534 All right, roll it over on fsu.. 361 00:16:37,567 --> 00:16:39,601 Aw, come on! You know I'm good for it.. 362 00:16:39,634 --> 00:16:43,634 Where am I gonna get that kind of cash tonight? 363 00:16:44,868 --> 00:16:47,701 I'll be over with the money in an hour. 364 00:16:47,734 --> 00:16:50,334 Charlie, you don't want to do this. 365 00:16:50,367 --> 00:16:52,501 I just have to get even. Florida state is a lock!. 366 00:16:52,534 --> 00:16:54,501 You said the same thing about the red wings 367 00:16:54,534 --> 00:16:56,167 and Michigan state.. 368 00:16:56,200 --> 00:16:58,567 No, no... those were sure things.. 369 00:16:58,601 --> 00:17:00,801 This is a lock.. 370 00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:03,667 All I have to do 371 00:17:03,701 --> 00:17:06,400 is parlay both college dogs in the front bracket 372 00:17:06,434 --> 00:17:09,167 and round-Robin a 3-team, 61/2-point teaser.. 373 00:17:09,200 --> 00:17:12,367 When you put it that way, I feel like such a fool. 374 00:17:12,400 --> 00:17:13,534 Charlie.... 375 00:17:13,567 --> 00:17:15,834 So far, all you've lost is money.. 376 00:17:15,868 --> 00:17:17,801 Don't let it go any further. 377 00:17:17,834 --> 00:17:20,100 I've gotta go with Carter on this one.. 378 00:17:20,133 --> 00:17:21,934 You've got too much to lose.. 379 00:17:21,968 --> 00:17:24,267 Who are you to lecture me?. 380 00:17:24,300 --> 00:17:25,567 Your friend.. 381 00:17:25,601 --> 00:17:27,200 Friends make things more fun.. 382 00:17:27,234 --> 00:17:29,200 When you're around, things get less fun. 383 00:17:29,234 --> 00:17:32,367 I gotta go with Charlie on this one.. 384 00:17:32,400 --> 00:17:35,400 You can be a real downer. 385 00:17:35,434 --> 00:17:37,334 I wouldn't expect you to understand.. 386 00:17:37,367 --> 00:17:39,334 You don't have the guts to gamble.. 387 00:17:39,367 --> 00:17:41,567 You'll never know what a rush it is.. 388 00:17:41,601 --> 00:17:44,167 That ball represents how far you've come in 6 months.. 389 00:17:44,200 --> 00:17:46,167 Now you want to throw it all away? 390 00:17:46,200 --> 00:17:48,834 I don't have time for this crap. 391 00:17:48,868 --> 00:17:51,434 I am burning these index cards.... 392 00:17:51,467 --> 00:17:54,300 Except for the chili recipe... that does sound delicious.. 393 00:17:55,901 --> 00:17:57,601 Now do me a favor and back off!. 394 00:17:57,634 --> 00:17:59,601 If you want to sell that baseball, 395 00:17:59,634 --> 00:18:01,167 I won't stand in your way.. 396 00:18:01,200 --> 00:18:03,267 Good.. 397 00:18:03,300 --> 00:18:05,634 Aha! 398 00:18:09,267 --> 00:18:12,167 Paul! Paul! Do something!. 399 00:18:12,200 --> 00:18:13,868 Um, uh, uh... 400 00:18:13,901 --> 00:18:16,534 the power of Christ compels you!. 401 00:18:21,133 --> 00:18:24,100 I can't believe Charlie... I go to great lengths, 402 00:18:24,133 --> 00:18:26,267 put together a professional intervention, 403 00:18:26,300 --> 00:18:28,367 and he doesn't even stay for the grand finale.. 404 00:18:28,400 --> 00:18:30,334 We're all sorry we missed out 405 00:18:30,367 --> 00:18:32,834 on the "I believe I can fly" singalong. 406 00:18:32,868 --> 00:18:34,834 I wouldn't expect you to understand 407 00:18:34,868 --> 00:18:36,534 the healing power of song.. 408 00:18:37,968 --> 00:18:40,300 What do you want to do? Do we keep the pressure on?. 409 00:18:40,334 --> 00:18:43,534 Let's give him some space. Let's just remain upbeat.. 410 00:18:43,567 --> 00:18:45,934 Good morning. 411 00:18:45,968 --> 00:18:48,300 I don't see what's so good about it.. 412 00:18:48,334 --> 00:18:51,501 Did you go to the pawn shop?. 413 00:18:51,534 --> 00:18:52,834 Yes, I did.. 414 00:18:52,868 --> 00:18:54,534 Guess what... 415 00:18:54,567 --> 00:18:57,868 that ball isn't worth $15,000 after all.. 416 00:18:57,901 --> 00:19:00,501 It's worth $20,000.. 417 00:19:00,534 --> 00:19:01,667 Great!. 418 00:19:01,701 --> 00:19:03,834 You were able to tease your boxes, 419 00:19:03,868 --> 00:19:05,501 double down your dogs, 420 00:19:05,534 --> 00:19:07,801 get papa a new pair of shoes.. 421 00:19:07,834 --> 00:19:10,000 At the end of the day, 422 00:19:10,033 --> 00:19:12,033 all that ball meant to you was money? 423 00:19:12,067 --> 00:19:14,968 I never asked for that ball. I never wanted that attention.. 424 00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:17,567 You did a good job, and the mayor rewarded you.. 425 00:19:17,601 --> 00:19:19,234 Why is that a problem?. 426 00:19:19,267 --> 00:19:21,334 When people's expectations get too high, 427 00:19:21,367 --> 00:19:23,334 all you'll do is disappoint them.. 428 00:19:23,367 --> 00:19:24,767 Believe me, I know!. 429 00:19:24,801 --> 00:19:26,801 That's why I'm not living my life for you, 430 00:19:26,834 --> 00:19:29,167 the mayor, or anybody else.. 431 00:19:29,200 --> 00:19:32,000 If I want to gamble, I'm gonna gamble.. 432 00:19:32,033 --> 00:19:33,934 And you know what?. 433 00:19:38,968 --> 00:19:41,033 I don't want to gamble.. 434 00:19:41,067 --> 00:19:43,334 You didn't sell it.. 435 00:19:43,367 --> 00:19:44,834 What happened?. 436 00:19:44,868 --> 00:19:47,300 When I got to the pawn shop, 437 00:19:47,334 --> 00:19:50,767 I reached into my pocket for the ball, 438 00:19:50,801 --> 00:19:54,367 and I pulled out your stupid index cards. 439 00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:58,334 I see tips on possible restraining techniques, 440 00:19:58,367 --> 00:20:01,300 lyrics to "I believe I can fly." . 441 00:20:03,300 --> 00:20:05,734 How weak is that?. 442 00:20:05,767 --> 00:20:08,100 Told ya.. 443 00:20:08,133 --> 00:20:09,934 Then I came to this one... 444 00:20:09,968 --> 00:20:12,834 a list of the things you guys appreciate about me... 445 00:20:12,868 --> 00:20:15,567 things like my "determination," 446 00:20:15,601 --> 00:20:17,634 my "friendship," 447 00:20:17,667 --> 00:20:20,234 my "fine physique"... 448 00:20:20,267 --> 00:20:22,367 that one was mine. 449 00:20:24,000 --> 00:20:27,100 Carter made us write 10!. 450 00:20:27,133 --> 00:20:30,400 But "physique" was your number 2!. 451 00:20:33,334 --> 00:20:35,501 It really meant a lot to me. 452 00:20:35,534 --> 00:20:37,801 I've never been around people 453 00:20:37,834 --> 00:20:40,000 who look out for me the way you guys do.. 454 00:20:41,167 --> 00:20:43,067 And then it hit me... 455 00:20:43,100 --> 00:20:45,667 I like my life now. I don't want to mess it up.. 456 00:20:47,067 --> 00:20:49,701 I guess what I'm really trying to say is that... 457 00:20:49,734 --> 00:20:52,334 you don't need to say anything, Charlie.. 458 00:20:52,367 --> 00:20:53,968 Come here.. 459 00:20:55,901 --> 00:20:59,067 I would rather have said something.. 460 00:21:06,501 --> 00:21:10,434 Come on, Charlie, it's all up to you.. 461 00:21:10,467 --> 00:21:13,367 You're holding up the game, Charlie.. 462 00:21:13,400 --> 00:21:16,868 Come on, Charlie... we haven't got all night.. 463 00:21:26,801 --> 00:21:28,200 Go fish.. 464 00:21:29,634 --> 00:21:32,100 Sit, ubu, sit. Good dog. 33317

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