Original subtitles

Ah, Mr. Hawkes.

I heard you were here in Juarez.

And I heard you were patrolling this neck of the woods.

My information was good.

What's good is when a man can mix business with pleasure.

And my business is your pleasure

unless you're too tired to play.

Never too tired to get my revenge.

You know, it's been four years

since I'm remembering Durango,

when you had all the luck with the cards.

And you with the ladies.

This time it will be different.

Colonel.

Roberto.

Place the gun over there.

Feed and water the horses.

We stay here the night.

When I win, I will give you all the women, huh, Mr. Hawkes?

I like that.

One.

He told me I was the marrying kind.

So long as he wasn't the one who had to marry you.

Two.

Daddy Bean says when you find your man,

put a saddle on him, corral him.

He's all yours, body and boots.

Three.

Last night he told me I was

the most desirable woman in the whole wide west.

Four.

I want him for the rest of my life, Eula.

You just want him for when the sun goes down.

And I'm gonna have him.

Me!

Over my dead body, Ruby Roy Bean.

Ruby Roy?

Eula.

Now, hold on there.

No cause for two such young and beautiful

and determined ladies to be taking arms against each other.

Or me.

Uh...

like I said, I should be going.

Over our dead bodies!

You wouldn't shoot a man in the back, would you?

Oh!

Why, thank you, Eula.

I'll accept this as a wedding gift.

Your body and mind, Ethan, belong to Ruby Roy Bean.

I'm taking you home to Daddy Bean to love, to honor,

to obey... Come on!

And to bed!

Ruby Roy, let it be.

I'll see your 100 and raise you $200.

300 to me.

Plus 500.

It looks like Señor Hawkes wants to share in our new wealth.

Do not get greedy, Mr. Hawkes.

Remember, you once told me it is very dangerous

for a gambler to get greedy.

I also told you to play the cards

when they're running in your favor.

You know, Mr. Hawkes,

I generally find that any gambler that talks about having

a good hand is only wishing he had one.

I'll see your 500 and raise you 500 more.

I call.

Looks like the cards are running

in Mr. Cantrell's favor instead of mine.

Jacks and fives.

Aces and threes.

Hold it, Hawkes.

Something the matter?

I believe there is.

Colonel, I propose a little side bet.

I have a thousand dollars here

that says Hawkes has slipped a card on us.

I'll take that bet.

Why, Miss Burgundy.

I certainly didn't expect to see you here.

I didn't expect to see you here either, Lute.

Look, I don't know who the hell either one of you are,

but if you've got a point to make, I wish you would make it.

I plan to.

Excuse me.

I don't know about you, but I've never played poker

with that card before.

The joker.

Mr. Cantrell, the only way you would know that card

was in here is if you had planted it.

Oh, he's lying.

You saw him.

He hid that card.

Where I come from, a man who cheats at cards

is no better than a horse thief.

Soldados!

Colonel, don't you think a matter such as this

would be better discussed quietly, privately?

This man cheated.

Hey, everybody here saw that.

What are you gonna do about it?

Colonel, you can see what he's doing.

He's trying to set me up.

Oh, I can see it very well, and he has created a problem.

The army's unpopular enough these days, and we must do

whatever we can when we can to please these peasants.

And a good hanging will take

the people's mind off revolution.

Take him and hang him!

Me?

Wait a minute.

You're kidding.

Sorry.

Good call, Colonel.

What the hell?

Take him and hang him also!

I was afraid you'd say that.

Both men are suspect.

I will not tolerate such conduct!

Poker is a game reserved for gentlemen, men of honor.

Besides...

I would have won the whole thing eventually.

Any complaints?

No.

Roberto!

Colonel, you really are a bad poker player.

Mr. Hawkes, I have your money.

I have your life.

How bad can I be?

Señorita.

No speako el Spanisho.

Yeah, uh-huh, well...

Hey!

Looky there.

What's going on up here?

Think we got a hanging, don't you?

Hawkes, why'd you say that to him, then?

Have you got a plan?

No.

I just thought he should know.

Great.

I'm sure he'll have trouble sleeping tonight.

Hey!

Take a good look.

Keep thinking "What's going on?"

Sorry about that, pard.

Nah. Hey!

Muchachos.

You know...

all in all, I'd have to say this was a pretty bad idea.

Yeah.

Cut him loose or you're next.

I'm not gonna say it again.

Cut him loose.

Oh, no.

♪ On a warm summer's evenin' ♪

♪ On a train bound for nowhere ♪

♪ I met up with a gambler ♪

♪ We were both too tired to sleep ♪

♪ So, we took turns a-starin' ♪

♪ Out the window at the darkness ♪

♪ 'Til boredom overtook us ♪

♪ And he began to speak ♪

♪ He said, Son, I've made a life ♪

♪ Out of reading people's faces ♪

♪ Knowin' what the cards were ♪

♪ By the way they held their eyes ♪

♪ So, if you don't mind my sayin' ♪

♪ I can see you're out of aces ♪

♪ For a taste of your whiskey ♪

♪ I'll give you some advice ♪

♪ So, I handed him my bottle ♪

♪ And he drank down my last swallow ♪

♪ Then he bummed a cigarette ♪

♪ And asked me for a light ♪

♪ And the night got deathly quiet ♪

♪ And his face lost all expression ♪

♪ Said if you're gonna play the game, Boy, ♪

♪ You got to learn to play it right ♪

♪ You got to know when to hold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to fold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to walk away ♪

♪ And know when to run ♪

♪ You never count your money ♪

♪ When you're sittin' at the table ♪

♪ There'll be time enough for countin' ♪

♪ When the dealin's done ♪

♪ Every gambler knows ♪

♪ That the secret to survivin' ♪

♪ Is knowin' what to throw away ♪

♪ Knowin' what to keep ♪

♪ 'Cause every hand's a winner ♪

♪ And every hand's a loser ♪

♪ And the best that you can hope for ♪

♪ Is to die in your sleep ♪

♪ And when he'd finished speakin' ♪

♪ He turned back toward the window ♪

♪ Crushed out his cigarette ♪

♪ Faded off to sleep ♪

♪ And somewhere in the darkness ♪

Don't know where you came from,

but I'm glad you came along when you did.

I've been looking for you for a long time, Mr. Hawkes.

Why?

'Cause both of us are going to San Francisco.

♪ You got to know when to hold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to fold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to walk away ♪

♪ And know when to run ♪

♪ You never count your money ♪

♪ When you're sittin' at the table ♪

♪ There'll be time enough for countin' ♪

♪ When the dealin's done ♪

♪ You got to know when to hold 'em ♪

♪ When to hold 'em

What makes you think I even want to go to San Francisco?

'Cause in three weeks they're gonna outlaw gambling

in this country, and I can't imagine

Brady Hawkes not wanting to be there

for the last great game.

Well, here we go again.

Kind of thought they might stop at the border.

♪ There'll be time enough for countin' ♪

♪ When the dealin's done ♪

♪ You got to know when to hold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to fold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to walk away ♪

♪ And know when to run ♪

♪ You never count your money ♪

♪ When you're sittin' at the table ♪

♪ There'll be time enough for countin' ♪

♪ When the dealin's done ♪

You know, you know a hell of a lot about me,

and I don't know anything about you.

My name's Burgundy Jones from up around Oklahoma,

Indian territory.

So, you're Burgundy Jones.

They say I've missed a lot not playing

in your establishment.

Well, they tell me I missed a lot, too.

Maybe you ought to tell me about your plans

in San Francisco.

The new law is gonna change the way a lot of us live.

My colleagues and I want to back you in the big game

and split the winnings 50/50.

Well, I don't want to seem ungrateful

for what you did back there,

but I've never taken on a partner in my life.

I don't plan to start now.

How much money you got in your pocket?

Enough.

If my pair bet $50 against your three aces,

could you call me?

No.

Hawkes, don't kid yourself.

It's gonna take $100,000 to get you

in that poker game in San Francisco.

Now, I got the money, and you've got the skill,

so are we partners or not?

Señor Hawkes!

Hola, Señor Hawkes.

Señorita Burgundy.

I am afraid you have embarrassed me, the Mexican army,

and our presidente, who I faithfully serve

under these unfortunate circumstances.

Colonel, if you're gonna hang

us, why don't you just get to it?

But don't make us sit here and listen

to all your pompous lies.

Colonel, I think what she means..

No need to apologize, Señor Hawkes.

Señorita Burgundy is right about my lies.

What she's wrong about is the hanging.

I am not gonna hang you.

I'm gonna shoot you!

Then I'm gonna cut your head off to set an example.

Hey!

It's the Rifleman.

¡Vamonos, muchachos! ¡Rapido!

You two okay?

Lucas McCain.

You haven't slowed down a bit, have you?

I'm doing the best I can.

Brady Hawkes, how are you?

And who's this pretty lady?

My new partner.

Burgundy Jones.

Miss Burgundy Jones.

Passed through your place once some time ago

up in Indian territory.

Very nice accommodations and real friendly employees

as I remember.

Brady, how come they were chasing you?

Card game.

Actually, it was a difference of opinion in a card game.

Where you two headed?

California.

You don't say.

My son just went to California.

Looking for gold?

Well, my boy Mark says it's a new kind of gold rush.

It's called moving pictures.

I heard about that.

Two men from New Jersey headed west

looking for sunshine and money.

Mark heard they were also looking for cowboys.

He said that sounded better than mending fence

and punching cows, so he took off.

Well, I'd better be headed back to Norfolk.

Good luck to you, Hawkes.

Miss Jones.

Moving pictures.

What the hell's this world coming to, huh?

Lucas McCain.

That man's a legend in these parts.

I heard the word partner, didn't I?

Does that mean we're gonna go by Dodge City

and pick up the money?

On two conditions.

One, that we can stop in Langtry on the way,

and the other, that you get control of that temper of yours.

You trying to get us killed?

My daddy always told me my temper

was gonna get me in trouble.

What's in Langtry?

A fella I traveled with in Europe.

If I'm gonna play in that big game, he deserves to be there.

Daddy Bean always told me, "When you find the right man,"

"do whatever's in your heart to bring him home."

And I have.

Yee-haw!

Whoo-hoo-hoo!

The court is now in session.

Come on, string her up.

Order!

Order in the court!

Quiet!

I know we all want to get to the races,

but the business of my court comes first.

Now... Ethan Cassidy,

you stand accused of willfully deceiving

my only loving daughter.

How do you plead?

Uh... Guilty as charged!

You're accused of giving my daughter encouragement

that you would, in good faith, enter into holy matrimony

with her to love her, cherish her, and obey her,

and give her the three kids she wants.

How do you plead?

Uh... Guilty as charged!

Does anyone in this courtroom have anything to say

in defense of Ethan Cassidy?

Ruby Roy.

Daddy...

Your Honor, I think you should consider other..

Ruby Roy, you're not permitted to speak on this issue

on the grounds that you're an emotional creature

and you're too closely involved in the case.

Now, it's up to me to look to the best interest

of my one and only loving daughter

and to adjudicate these matters.

Honey...

if this cowboy betrayed you once, he'll betray you again.

Remove Mr. Cassidy to the gallows.

But, Your Honor..

Your Honor, I'd like to speak on behalf of Mr. Cassidy.

Brady! You're too late.

To the gallows.

Now, let's get back to the horse race.

Your Honor, I've known Ethan Cassidy for many years,

and I've always known him to be a trusting, honest,

loyal friend, a true cowboy.

If you pardon the expression, it'd be criminal

for a court to convict and hang

an upstanding young man like this.

Who the hell are you?

Brady Hawkes, Sir.

Well, who's that pretty young lady with you?

Miss Burgundy Jones, Your Honor.

You know, Judge, we have no better friend in this world

than Ethan Cassidy.

Then, you two can walk right out to my gallows

and say good-bye to your friend.

Now, let's get back to the races!

Your Honor..-

You're dangerously close to trying my patience, Hawkes.

It's just that I believe that every woman should have

the right to choose her own husband,

so I propose that this young lady have a chance

to marry this man that she so dearly loves.

What a wonderful idea.

Look, are we gonna talk about it or do it?

What proposal?

I propose a horse race, Your Honor, between a horse

of your choice against my friend on foot.

You're on.

Except I pick the track.

40 yards, 20 up, 20 back.

You're still on.

Your horse wins, Ethan here marries your daughter.

He loses, you set him free.

What I was trying to tell you earlier, Daddy,

marrying him's better than hanging him.

It's a deal.

I don't know what I'd do without you.

Where you been?

Ethan, I don't know what I'd do without you.

One round of drinks for everyone before the race.

You too, son.

Hawkes.

Johnny Loughlin, how long you been in my jail?

Two years, three weeks, six days, four hours,

and 52 minutes, Your Honor.

Is there a doubt in your mind that Old George over there

can outrun this cowboy?

Big horse, big feet.

Good traction, Your Honor.

That's the idea.

If you ride Old George across the finish line first,

you're a free man.

If you don't, you're a dead man.

All right, Cassidy, let's get on with it.

Ruby Roy?

He's a sly old devil, isn't he?

Can you run that fast?

He was counting on me taking him on the turn.

I was also counting on a dry track.

Well, Ethan, do your best.

Racers, to your mark.

All right, Johnny! All right, Johnny!

Get set!

Get him, Johnny! Come on!

Come on, pal! Go!

Faster!

Don't worry, Honey.

Hawkes thinks his boy could take Johnny on the turn,

but Old George is gonna kick so much dirt.

That cowboy can't even see!

You got him!

You got him!

You got him!

You got him, Johnny!

Yes!

Come on! Hurry!

You did it, John!

Ethan!

You lost!

I just knew you'd lose.

Oh, thank you, Judge Bean!

Today is the happiest day of my life!

Come here, cowboy.

Uh, Judge, Your Honor, uh, may I say a few words?

What is it?

Uh... well, I'm not, uh...

Judge, with all due apologies to your daughter,

I only asked her to dance once,

and that was three months ago in..

Amarillo.

Amarillo.

It all happened so fast.

Not fast enough.

Daddy?

Get up here, cowboy.

Get up here, Ruby Roy.

By the law invested in me west of the Pecos,

I now pronounce Ruby Roy Bean and...

What's your name, son?

Ethan Cassidy.

I now pronounce Ruby Roy Bean

and Ethan Cassidy man and wife!

Kiss the bride, Cassidy.

Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho!

There it is!

You need any help, boy?

Wait a minute.

Before you go, let's get a picture of my baby

and my new son-in-law, Cassidy.

Ruby Roy, how soon you gonna give Daddy Bean

some little deputies?

That's it, look at the camera.

Show your teeth if you got 'em.

Come on, Mr. Cassidy.

It's time to give Mrs. Cassidy what she's been waiting for.

I want dancing!

I want whiskey!

I want music!

Time to celebrate my daughter's wedding.

Hawkes, I believe this pretty lady's spoken for.

Say, isn't that Lillie Langtry?

Yes!

But, the late and beloved Mrs. Bean.

I do miss her so.

I could see why.

Let me buy you another drink.

Help.

To Johnny Loughlin.

A free man!

You're a fine lad.

So, Johnny Loughlin...

Here's to your winning the derby.

And the Preakness.

And the Belmont.

And here's to getting the hell out of Texas.

Right.

Now, let me just put a little music on.

It'll help you relax.

I know how anxious you must be.

Just relax.

I'm gonna put on something soft and pretty for you.

Oh, Ethan.

This is gonna be the most romantic night of our lives.

And there we are coming down the stretch.

So, you go to the whip.

Aye, I go to the whip.

Can you sing, Mister?

Can I sing, Laddie?

♪ Does your mother ♪

♪ Come from Ireland ♪

♪ 'Cause there's something ♪

♪ In you Irish ♪

Got to drink a toast to that beautiful red hair.

Yeah.

You know...

I'm the first horse thief the judge never hung.

He always said he'd have something useful for a small man.

You're right.

You're right.

Just relax, Ethan.

It won't be but a minute before I'm running my hands

up and down your strong and handsome body.

Brady.

What's he doing here?

He won the race.

He gets the prize.

But she'll know it's not me.

Not 'til it's too late.

Help me get him in.

Cover him up.

Good.

Ta-da!

That's my little girl.

Having herself a grand ol' time.

Ain't that right, Miss "Burguly?"

Miss Burgumy.

Where's my Miss Burguny?

I told her how much I miss you.

I told her.

Ethan, ever been to San Francisco?

Sure haven't.

You're going there now.

What happened in Mexico?

Couldn't raise the stake?

I lost what little I had.

Is that why you didn't show up when we planned to meet?

Like all gamblers, I thought that if I stuck around long

enough, my game would come back, and it just didn't happen.

This may be my only chance to San Francisco,

and good or bad, we need to run with it.

Come on, guys, let's get this show on the road.

Got a long way to travel.

You sure she's even got the money?

She says five women are putting up the stake,

and I know 'em all.

Yeah, I'm sure you do.

No, I mean by reputation.

These are stand-up women.

They say they've got the money, I believe 'em.

Oh, by the way, Hawkes, when we get to Dodge City,

I'm gonna buy you some new clothes

and get you out of them border-town duds.

Make you look like a winner.

Make you look like a winner.

It wasn't my Ethan who'd do something like that, Daddy.

It was that Hawkes.

Ethan would never have left me.

You find Hawkes, and I'll make sure I find a place for him

on the gallows personally.

Lest I say to you do not drink wine or strong drink,

thee or thy sons, lest ye shall die.

As the good book says...

Those dime novels that do nothing but glorify

their subjects are a thing of the past, Mr. Earp.

Now, my publisher wants the facts behind the legend,

the real Wyatt Earp, warts and all, Marshal.

I don't know that warts

is how I want to be remembered, Mr. White.

Just a figure of speech, Marshal Earp.

What I mean is journalism the way it should be..

Real, nothing but the facts, told the way it really was.

Nothing but the facts.

Hey, Marshal.

Marshal.

We're looking for a bank we can rob.

Picked a bad day, Mister.

Hawkes?

Brady Hawkes?

What are you doing in Dodge City?

Just passing through.

Say hello to my business associate Miss Burgundy Jones,

my partner Ethan Cassidy.

Wyatt Earp.

Still the fastest gun in the West.

Well, I don't know about that.

I, uh, I haven't been tested for a while.

Last I heard, you were in Alaska.

Followed the gold rush up there,

made my stakes in a few saloons up in Nome.

I see that you're still playing, huh?

It's all I know.

Can you recommend a good rooming house for the night?

Well, the best in town's right over there.

Little Murphy's.

Come to think of it, uh, that place has been awful busy

last couple of days.

We'll give it a try.

Ma'am.

Brady Hawkes?

The gambler?

You know Brady Hawkes?

Son, I think the best way to write that

is that he knows Wyatt Earp.

Yes, Sir.

I see your partners are here.

Maybe we can get off to an early start in the morning.

Ladies, look who I found hiding out down in Mexico.

Brady Hawkes.

How have you been?

Making ends meet, Kate.

You know Ethan?

No, I don't, but maybe that can change.

Pleasure, Ma'am.

Pleasure's all mine.

Good to see you, Brady.

Sonora Sue.

How come you don't visit my place

for such a long time, huh?

Well, as I remember your place, the cards are too short

and the knives are too long.

Well, at Sonora Sue's, we love

to keep things lively.

Daisy, you're as beautiful as ever.

Thanks, Brady.

So, when you coming back through Cheyenne?

It's hard to tell, the way things are changing.

You doing okay?

You know me.

I'll survive.

Yeah, you will survive.

Yeah.

Well, if I would have known where you were,

I would have sent for you instead of..

Hawkes, you better say hi to Miss Rosalee.

Hello, Mr. Hawkes.

It's a pleasure to finally meet you.

Rosalee, the one thing I regret in my life

is I never played in your establishment.

I understand it's one of the finest in Kansas.

Huh!

It's the finest, and when we get this antigambling bunk

out of Congress, we'll repeal the law,

and you have my invitation

to sit down and play the first game.

I look forward to that.

And we all look forward to tomorrow.

Yes.

It's a pleasure to finally meet you, Mr. Hawkes.

Good luck in the morning.

Ethan, why don't you take the horses over to the livery.

What did she mean, "Good luck in the morning"?

The game tomorrow to see who takes the money

to San Francisco.

I've traveled a long way over hard ground

because you told me I had a stake.

And you do, soon as you clean out the other contenders.

Wait a minute!

So, now I have to earn my way to San Francisco?

You never said one word about contenders.

Oh, get a grip, Hawkes!

When's the last time you saw five women agree on something?

Never.

Because it's never happened, and it's not gonna happen here.

So, we're gonna have a little playoff.

Each woman brought $20,000 and her player.

The last one at the table takes the money to San Francisco

and represents our little group.

Why didn't you tell me about this before?

'Cause you wouldn't have come!

You're right, I wouldn't have.

But you're here now, and so's the money.

What are you gonna do about it?

Brady.

Come on, put the horses away.

Hey, I've got some business to take care of,

but when I get back, we'll go out

and have a big steak dinner and some wine.

I don't like being lied to.

She was right.

You wouldn't have come.

She said they were gonna back me.

You think they know about England?

England's a long ways away and a long time ago.

Might as well be yesterday to me.

Last year, last week, what's the difference?

You don't play here, you don't play San Francisco.

You know what I think?

When you lost your money to that Englishman,

you lost your game.

You've been playing scared ever since.

I win enough to survive.

Not enough to get ahead.

Look, Burgundy Jones is nobody's fool.

She went to a lot of trouble to track you down

and get you to play with her money.

She's not betting on some broken-down claim, though.

She's betting on you.

If I win that game, we have to travel all the way

to California with her.

I'll let you deal with her god-awful temper.

We'll figure something out.

Please make sure both horses are properly shod.

My girls and I are taking our mission out west, and... Ow!

Oh, I... Oh.

Pardon me.

I am so sorry.

My fault.

I should have gotten out of your way.

Oh, no, I should turn around and start walking forwards.

Otherwise I never will get to see California.

California?

Well, we might be heading that direction ourselves.

Careful what you promise, Ethan.

Ethan?

Oh, uh...

Well, that's a nice name.

Uh, I'm Melody.

Pleasure to make your acquaintance, Ma'am.

My girls and I will be going to California tomorrow.

Maybe we'll see you along the trail.

That would be just fine with me.

Maybe we'll see you along the trail.

Uh, these are three of my disciples.

Edwina. Hello.

Colette. Hello.

Susanne. Hi.

This is Mr.?

Cassidy. Ethan Cassidy.

Pleasure to make your acquaintance.

I hope you travel with the Lord, Mr. Cassidy.

Or Lady Luck.

Johnny?

Hi.

Hi, Tommy.

Hi.

How you doing?

Good to see ya.

Hi, Honey.

How ya doing?

Fine.

Oh...

Oh, Mama, it's so good to see you.

Oh, Baby, I've missed you so much.

I missed you too.

Burgundy.

Paula.

Jenny, can I borrow your mom for just a minute?

I'll give her right back. Okay, come here.

I want to go over here.

Well, were you able to stall 'em?

They said they'd give you a month, Burgundy.

Well, bankers are a generous bunch.

Yeah.

What else they say?

Oh, they said there's a big farming company

out of Kansas City that's buying up all this land for farms.

Said the offer's already been made.

They'd give you a month out of courtesy

before we all had to be out of here.

Don't say anything to the children

until you hear from me, okay?

Yeah.

Banker said that there's churches

to take over the orphanage now.

Said that there's no more need for a whore

to be looking after the children of other whores.

Help us fight the good fight, Sir.

Ma'am.

And I'm certain you could profit from this.

Save your breath, Sister,

'cause you're sure not saving me.

Now, Rosalee...

Now, Rosalee nothing!

These fire and brimstone fools

are ruining the natural way people live.

Trying to impose your morals on others.

Forcing lawmakers to pass laws

that everybody breaks when the sun goes down.

Hmm.

You ought to be ashamed of yourself.

You, Madam, ought to be ashamed of yourself,

and someday you will be.

Times have changed.

This movement will sweep the nation.

Oh, and you'll be hearing a lot more about me.

A lot more.

Makes me sick.

Pretty girl like that wasting herself.

She's right, Rosalee.

Times have changed, and I for one welcome it.

Oh, don't tell me you've been converted by her hogwash.

Time has converted me.

I'll tell you, and I know you know it,

the wild life gets old.

Honestly, I think I'm ready to find a good,

solid man and settle down.

You know, raise a family, go to church,

be respectable for a change.

Sounds lovely, Daisy, but where do women like us

find men like that?

I could just weep when I think of how I let

Brady Hawkes slip through my fingers.

You know, he was the kind of man that a girl

could just sit by the fire and read a book to.

Daisy, you don't even know how to read.

For him, I'd learn.

Are you scared, Mama?

Why?

Why do you say that?

All of us older kids know that the banker came out

and talked to Paula.

Said he was gonna plow our home into a pasture.

Don't you believe that.

I don't if you don't.

Good.

Jenny, while I'm gone, I want you to do something for me.

I want you to talk to all the kids,

find out where y'all would like to go.

And when I get home, we're all gonna go on a vacation

anywhere you want.

And when we get back, this house will still belong to us.

I'm not going anywhere, and it's not going anywhere.

This will always be a place for children

to be born and raised.

This old house is where your mama was born.

And she intends for it to be standing for a long, long time.

I love you, Mama.

I love you too, Honey.

Dodge is a pretty quiet town now.

It's been 22 years since anybody tried to rob the bank.

Right down here was the finest gambling palace in town.

All varieties.

Bat's brother was the bartender.

Served the best bonded whiskey west of the Mississippi.

Afternoon, Mrs. Patterson, Mrs. Ebert.

They're temperance ladies.

They had their way,

Dodge would be drier than a Texas drought.

Brady, meet my player, Bad Jon Wilson.

Hates to lose.

Jon.

Hi, Ethan.

Sure nice to see you again.

Come on, Kate.

I'm your player.

An honor to see you again, Mr. Hawkes.

Well, you two know each other.

Smiling Charlie Adams.

We played before in Manadawat.

Indian country.

It's that memory of yours that scares all us gamblers.

They say he's as good as you used to be.

Used to be?

That's what they say.

Burgundy.

Smiling Charlie?

Smiles whether he wins or loses.

Isn't that Lyin' Lyman Jones with Daisy there?

Thought he was a horse trader.

Daisy.

This your player?

Tells me he's the best gambler in the territory.

And he seems like such a...

A nice, sincere young man.

Lyman Jones, Brady,

from Poughkeepsie by way of Chattanooga.

Residing in Tombstone now.

Sue, you do have a player, don't you?

Burgundy, you know Sonora Sue.

I always have a player.

Hawkes.

Glad to see you made it here to Dodge.

Yeah, I wouldn't miss it for the world.

Couldn't have made it without Burgundy.

Then again, neither could you.

If I'd have had my way...

I would have left you there to hang.

I thought we come here to play cards.

Something about this room don't feel right.

Gentlemen.

I'm Butterfingers O'Malley.

I will be dealing and settling any dispute

at my own discretion.

No woman is gonna tell me what to do.

I will maintain order.

Gentlemen, the game is five-card stud, unlimited raises.

All of the ladies have put up $20,000 apiece.

The game ends when one of you has all the money.

That lucky player will accompany

his sponsor to the game in San Francisco.

Now, do all understand the rules and agree to abide by them?

I need an answer.

You bet. Yeah, Ma'am.

Yeah, we understand.

Let's see your money.

Come on, woman.

In those days, Dodge was a...

a far cry from the peaceful little farm town it is today.

Gentlemen, the price of poker just went up.

$2,000 to stay and play.

Now, I know a lie when I see one, Lute.

Do believe I have to call.

I want a new deck.

These cards are as bad as anything I ever played with.

These cards aren't so bad.

It's the seat you're sitting in.

You don't touch the man next to you.

I'll call.

Boys, you're all calling me?

Well, that breaks my heart because I don't have much.

Just three lucky sevens.

Thought sure he was lying.

Thanks for the contribution.

He seems lost.

Is this the way he played in England?

He's reading 'em.

He'll find his way.

Just figuring out his game.

I hope he figures it out before it's too late.

Anybody moves...

Kill 'em.

Open the safe.

I'm afraid to do it.

Look, Elroy.

Twins.

Shut up.

Yes, Sir.

I said open the safe!

Where's the money?

There's no money in the bank today.

He's lying, Elroy!

Shut up.

Where's the money?

Uh, withdrawn.

All of it's gone.

Nobody'd withdraw a whole bank full of money.

We would.

Shut up!

Who took it?

The... Ladies.

Beautiful ladies over at the poker game.

Come on.

We've got to go tell Caine about this.

Last card.

Nine of spades.

Possible flush.

Four of clubs.

Possible flush.

Isn't that pretty?

Just the card I was looking for.

Pair of fives.

Yeah, why don't you just announce it out on the street?

Young man, I'd like a lot less lip from you

and a lot better playing.

Possible nothing.

Pair of queens.

Queens bet.

I'll check.

Brady, when you got 'em, you got to bet 'em.

$5,000.

I'm all in.

Fold.

Again.

I got a feeling, Lute.

I call.

I got a feeling too, Lute.

I got a feeling you don't have it.

Well, then, call me, Brady.

You can't win if you don't play.

Not this time.

But I don't think you have it.

You're right.

10 high.

10 high.

Well, that's too bad, Lute.

All black.

Hold it!

You know, you start mixing

spades with clubs in this game, you can get hurt.

All I said was it's all black.

Lyman, you lied to me.

Get out!

You said you were a card player.

No, actually I said I was a gambler.

Now, you give me a pair of dice, a roulette wheel..

Actually, horses.

Now, horses...

You show me a good piece of horseflesh,

I can flat out make you some money.

Wait a minute.

You promised me $2,000 for playing in this here game.

I said $1,000, and I lied.

It's amazing what some people won't do to win.

Lute.

Queen high.

Quite a feeling you had, Charlie.

You certainly are a player.

Lute, my queen beat your 10, and winning is winning.

Let's play cards.

How much did you get?

Not a dime.

What?

They took all the money out of the bank for a card game

over to the Long Branch.

Run by a bunch of women.

All the money?

Yeah.

A bunch of women?

Bunch of women.

Let's go get it.

I don't think we should.

Wyatt Earp will be on the lookout

now that we already hit the bank.

Theo, he's an old man.

But he's still Wyatt Earp.

Let's go!

Mount up!

Going back to Dodge City.

I'm telling you, Caine, this is a bad idea.

It's not smart, and I don't think we're gonna get..

That's right.

You don't think.

Anybody else have any thoughts?

That's right.

$5,000.

Too strong for me.

I'm gone.

Call.

Your pot, Mr. Hawkes.

Come on, let's go.

Put it in there.

Life can be so hard.

I'm in.

Two of hearts.

Seven of clubs.

Six of diamonds.

All right, let's start playing for some real money.

Ace of diamonds bets $3,000.

I need some help, Butterfingers.

Five of clubs.

Pair of fives.

Come on, come on, come on!

Let's go! Let's go!

Jon, slow down.

Ever dawn on you that the faster we play,

the quicker you lose?

New hand.

Ante up, gentlemen.

Four aces.

That's a great hand.

I fold.

I fold.

I'm out.

There's so little money in that pot,

I'm tempted to fold myself.

Three jacks.

Oh.

I can't believe I traveled all this way, for this.

You know, I don't mind losing to Brady Hawkes,

or even Lute Cantrell,

but if I never see this smiling, grinning...

Don't nobody else see it?

Oh, God!

Good choice, Kate!

Take him out to the prairie and let him loose!

Keep on smilin', Charlie.

Eh!

You know, I was just starting to like him?

We're now three players.

I guess Prairie Kate and I are pulling for Hawkes.

I think you're bluffing, Lute.

I call.

Then you're out, Charlie.

Too bad, full house.

But you were right about one thing..

Winning does have certain advantages.

Chief among them?

It makes me feel real good.

I enjoyed it, Mr. Hawkes.

Even though I lost, it doesn't get much better than this.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, well some of us are still playing,

all right?

Congratulations.

One of you is on his way to San Francisco.

Jack of diamonds.

Three of spades, jack bets.

Jack bets... $5,000.

I'm in.

King of diamonds.

Five of diamonds.

King bets.

Well, Hawkes... This time, it's gonna cost you 10,000.

You're pretty free with your money, aren't you?

You gotta spend it to make it.

I call.

Queen of diamonds.

Possible straight flush.

Four of clubs.

Possible straight.

$15,000.

You know, there is still a possibility...

that you could lose this hand.

There's an even better chance I'm gonna win.

I call.

Last card.

Ace of diamonds.

Possible royal flush.

10 of hearts, no help.

Lute, your bet.

Brady, I bet about now you're wishing

you'd left me hanging in Mexico.

I've got... $27,500 here.

And I'm betting it all.

Come on, Hawkes.

Straight flush...

Do you have it, Lute?

I don't think you do.

$27,500.

I'll call ya.

You call?

I call.

What the hell have you got?

I called you, Lute.

Oh.

Ace high.

Pretty impressive.

A pair of threes.

Well ladies, congratulate me.

I get to go to San Francisco.

Well, I guess Brady Hawkes still is the best.

No, he's not the best, he's the luckiest!

Nobody bets threes against cards like these.

Why'd you stay, Hawkes?

I believe in the cards.

Besides, you're such an easy read, Lute.

I watched your hole card.

When you had good cards... You'd hold it in your right hand.

Bad cards, you hold it in your left.

Any fool could see that.

You and I will be seeing more of each other, Hawkes.

Ethan? Uh-huh?

You'll take real good care of Brady, won't you?

Uh, yes, Ma'am.

Thank you.

Well, sooner gone, sooner there.

Okay. Ladies.

Mr. Hawkes, it's good that you believe in the cards.

But it's better that you believe in yourself.

Thanks, Butterfingers.

I'll be with you in a minute.

I'm gonna take care of the money.

Okay.

Good cards in the right hand, bad on the left.

He never even knew!

Well, it's not even true.

But I promise you, every time he plays poker from now on,

he'll think of that.

Well, you've got to admit,

she proved me right if nothing else.

How's that?

Well, maybe she shouldn't have tricked you into playing

in that game, but you proved you're still the best.

The best?

What about the Englishman?

Oh, come on, I told you to forget about him.

He's a world away.

Two gentlemen in San Francisco.

I think it suits us just fine.

No doubt when you get settled in,

you plan on bringing the new wife out, huh?

Hey, I'm not married.

Hey, listen... Oh, yes, you are married!

I'm not married..

Thanks, Mama, for everything.

I got it.

Yeah.

Leave the satchel on the ground...

And no one gets hurt!

Cade Dalton?

You scum!

Come get it, if you're man enough!

Miss Burgundy, maybe we should just give him the money.

Give it to him?

I've known this piece of trash all my life!

I wouldn't give you the sweat off my horse's butt!

I don't want to have to kill you, Burgundy.

But that much money doesn't leave me many options.

Come on, Burgundy, be smart!

Drop the money, and stay alive.

No chance.

One...

Unh!

Ah!

Looking for somebody?

Unh!

Aah!

Oh, my eyes!

Unh!

Hawkes!

Oh!

Cheyenne Body!

What are you doing here?

Aah!

Got myself a contract driving the stage for the military.

Aah!

Oh!

Wyatt thought there might be some trouble,

so he asked me to hang around and give him a hand.

Unh!

Ah.

I'm afraid little gets past old Wyatt, huh?

Unh!

Unh!

Aah!

Aah!

So, you reckon we ought to get out of here?

Oh!

I'm ready if you are.

Let's head for the stage.

Unh!

Ah!

Theo was right.

Wyatt is waiting for us.

Yah!

Jeez!

Ah!

There goes Cade.

Let's get out of here.

Get on the stage!

Oh!

Aah!

Unh.

Hyah!

Hyeh. Hyah! Hyah!

Hyah, Sam!

Bobby, come on!

Hyah! Hyah!

Hyah!

Hyah! Hyah!

That kind of money always attracts trouble.

Ah!

Unh!

Aah!

Unh!

♪ Long live his fame and long live his glory ♪

♪ And long may his story be told ♪

Son, like the man said, "When legend becomes fact,"

"print the legend."

Give me a hand, Brady!

Here I come!

Maybe not.

Aah!

Aah!

Hey, Cheyenne!

Yeah?

Looks like I found some military firepower down here.

The grenades, sure!

I don't reckon the Army would mind giving us a hand!

Aah!

Come on, Fox, give me all you've got!

Come on, boy!

Oh!

Ooh!

Aah!

Ho! Hold up!

Hold up!

Hyah!

Hyah!

Whoo-hoo-hoo!

Yeah! Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

Hyah!

Let's get out of here!

You all right?

It hurts, but I'll be fine.

That Cade don't take criticism too well, does he?

I guess not!

Ooh.

Hey.

Whoa.

Whoa, boys.

Yo, Doc Hewitt!

We got a gunshot wound here.

Okay, let's take a look at it.

Bring her on over here to the chair.

Thanks.

Cheyenne, thanks for your help.

We could never have done this without you.

Well, life's an adventure.

Things have been pretty quiet for me lately.

Good to get the old heart pumping again.

Doc Hewitt will get you patched up, Ma'am.

And good luck to all of you.

Ethan, why don't you go over to the hotel

and get us a couple of rooms.

I'll stay here with her and Doc.

Okay. I'll meet you in town.

Tell the Army thanks for us.

Sam, Bobby, come on, boys.

Yah!

Well, it looks like the bullet went clear through.

It could be serious.

Help me take her inside.

I told you not to do that, Slater.

What can I do for you, stranger?

Oh, I just need a couple rooms for the night.

All right.

Rooms 2 and 3, top of the stairs.

50 cents a room?

$1 in advance.

Hey, is there any good place to eat around here?

Well, yeah, right here.

Well, the food's no good, but the beer's cold.

Comes all the way in from St. Louis.

As you can see, we've got lots of ambiance here.

Lots of what?

Atmosphere.

Colorful characters, you know.

Hey, you're gonna like it here.

It's a nice town.

Heh! Really!

You seen our stables?

So, can I get out of here now?

Well, the wound's clean, but I'd like to keep you here

to make sure you don't develop a fever.

Why? I feel fine.

I'm not talking about the way you feel.

We're talking about the possibility

of developing an infection.

You get out there on the trail

and there's just no way to treat you.

How long before she can travel?

Well, I should know a little bit better in the morning.

She should stay the night here.

Will you be okay?

Oh, sure, go on.

Keep Ethan out of trouble.

Besides that, I need a little peace and quiet.

I said, if you can lift her, you can have her.

Watch your hand there, Cowboy.

Sorry, cowboy, but Ruby Roy didn't promise a dance to you.

You'll be the first to know if she changes her mind.

Boys!

Ruby Roy has a husband.

He's a cowboy like you and the only true love of my life,

and I miss him something terrible.

We were inconveniently separated on our wedding night.

Maybe some of you have seen him out there on the trail.

He's a handsome cowboy named Ethan Cassidy.

Whoa! What are you doing?

Sir, I am trying to conduct a visit here.

Would you please let me go?

Yee-haw!

Hands off there, boys!

This filly's mine!

What are you doing?

Get me down!

Pour me a beer, George!

Help! You're hurting me!

Let go of my arm!

Wait! Wait!

Help me!

Dag burn it, hey!

Get me down!

Whoa!

Get that animal out of here!

Whoa!

Henry, you know the rules.

No animals inside...

At least none of the four-legged variety.

Sober up!

Why, thank you, Ma'am... I mean, Sheriff.

My name's Kate.

We don't stand much on ceremony around here.

What you looking at, Jack?

Nothing, Ma'am.

As you can see, Shinbone's still

a little rough around the edges.

What brings you to town?

Well, I'm looking for my husband.

Good-looking man.

I'd remember if I'd seen him.

That's what they all say.

Well, how long you been chasing him?

Since our wedding night.

Wedding night?

Yes, Ma'am, and it wasn't even exactly a wedding night.

Well, you see, first he had to race this horse,

and then I found a jockey in my bed.

He was so little.

Oh, it was awful!

All right, now, just take it easy.

Settle down, hon.

This is kind of hard on my reputation.

Boys, you're walking a thin line.

Don't cross it!

Feeling better now, hon?

Yeah, I'm... I'm okay.

You know, my daddy, Judge Bean..

The judge?

I know him well.

We've done business together.

Well, he always says, when you find your man, corral him,

put a saddle on him, he's all yours.

Ethan slipped his bridle and I need to round him up.

I've chased down many a man in my day, but the plain fact

is, cowboys are easy to rope but hard to ride.

Good luck to you.

Thanks, Ma'am.

I'm gonna find him.

Women, huh?

Ain't they great?

You boys are really testing my patience tonight.

Brady!

Kate.

Still got all the moves.

What brings you here?

A game in town I don't know about?

Brady, you won't believe who was just in here.

Believe it?

I was standing outside, waiting for her to leave.

Kate Muldoon, Ethan Cassidy.

Evening, Ma'am.

You're the husband!

Yes, Ma'am, but no, Ma'am.

In all fairness, Kate, to Ethan,

his choice was to be hung or to be married.

All I did was ask her to dance once.

It must have been some dance.

If I were you, I'd make myself scarce tonight.

That's a mighty determined young lady on your trail.

That's some good advice, Ma'am.

I think I'll take it.

You're in Room 3.

I'll see you in the morning.

It was a pleasure meeting you, Ma'am.

He seems all right.

He's a good man.

Kate, you will never know

how many nights I've dreamed of you.

Why, Brady!

Oh, it's not that.

For a while there, I was a wanted man

and I kept having this dream that you were after me.

Well, believe me, if I had known, I would have caught you.

Looks like you found your place here.

Yeah, well, I got tired of the chase.

This town needed help, and I was in a helping mood.

So, they made you sheriff?

Mayor too.

Kind of ironic, a woman can't vote but she can run the town.

That's just what I'm doing.

And damn well, I bet.

Can you stay a few days?

No.

Gotta be out of here in the morning.

Seems like I'm always in a hurry when I run into you.

You're traveling awfully light.

This is my stake.

I'm on my way to San Francisco.

Biggest game of my life.

You're finally gonna make it.

Well, I'm happy for you, Brady.

Nothing's gonna stop me this time.

Cade Dalton and his boys are trying.

Dalton?

I've tangled with him myself.

He's got a lot of firepower, but I've got just the man

to help you out, R.J. Jeeter.

He's right across the way.

See him in the morning.

Hey, you didn't pay!

You know I done pay for that dance there,

you little darlin'!

Don't mess with me, Jack Lilley!

I could be elected sheriff someday.

'Til that day, Baby, you belong to me!

Jack, put me down!

Hey, need some help in there?

Jack, put me down!

No, thanks.

This is what they pay me for.

Brady, sweet dreams.

Are you Jeeter?

Oh! Oh! What?

Are you Jeeter?

Yeah. Hold on, hold on.

Yeah?

Brady Hawkes.

Kate sent me over.

Said she thought you might be able to help me out.

Howdy, Brady.

I reckon Kate's told you the good news.

No, she hasn't.

Well, this is it!

The future has arrived!

It's a genuine automobile!

Well, I don't really have any use for an automobile.

I just banged out the fenders the other day.

Now all I gotta do is work the bugs out.

Actually, what I need is a strongbox, something steel

and bulletproof that I can put this valise in.

And I need a buggy and a team, and I need it fast.

Why, I can fix this up for you real quick.

It's no problem.

Jeeter, I have to be out of here before noon.

Well, I can make a strongbox for you.

You know, that's the future, right there in your hands.

Right here?

Well, it's part of the whole picture.

You know, last year there were 77,988 of these machines

registered in this here country.

I can see a day where people will drive these things

across this nation.

Now, that's a vision, and my dream is to be a part of it.

You know, Jeeter, I have a dream too.

Mine includes a strongbox.

A strongbox.

I'll get right on it.

A man of vision is worthy of my best effort.

I understand vision.

I read a pamphlet on it once.

Didn't understand it too well, but...

Doc Hewitt tells me you're leaving today.

Anyone ever teach you to knock?

You know Burgundy can't travel yet, Brady.

She'll find her own way to San Francisco.

I can't wait here.

What the hell's going on here?

What's going on is a poker game,

and it's not gonna take place in Shinbone.

What about Burgundy?

You wouldn't have gotten this far without her.

She put up the money.

She put up the money for me

to play poker in San Francisco.

That was the deal, and you know it!

Listen to you, Brady.

You know, I stood by you because I believed in you.

You were always good for your word.

More than a gambler, you were a man of value.

And I still am.

A man of values never places business above friendship.

This was a friendship based on business.

You have an amazing ability, don't you,

to be able to see what you want to see,

to do what you want to do, don't you?

Maybe.

The fact is, I'm going.

Then, take this with you!

Damn, Brady.

What's going on here?

Sorry, folks.

Whoa!

Oh!

Good gracious, Ethan!

What's going on here?

You better ask him.

Ethan and I were just discussing the fact

that I'm going on without you.

Oh, let him go.

Fine.

I'll just find my own way to the game.

Not on your own, you're not.

I'm going with you.

That'll be $2 for the window.

They've gone up.

This is the road.

Let's do it here.

Is this good?

Is that gonna fit?

Yeah.

That's good.

Put it in.

That ought to get it.

Jeeter, say goodbye to Kate for me, if you will.

I appreciate you getting that out in such a hurry.

No problem.

I'm proud to show you the kind of work I do around here.

And next time you're passing through, I want to see you

driving out of here in one of my brand-new automobiles.

I like the idea of that automobile.

Bye-bye, Brady.

♪ Know when to fold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to walk away ♪

♪ Know when to run ♪

♪ You never count your money ♪

♪ When you're sittin' at the table ♪

♪ There'll be time enough for countin' ♪

♪ When the dealin's done ♪

♪ You've got to know when to hld 'm ♪

♪ When to hold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to fold 'em ♪

♪ When to fold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to walk away ♪

♪ Know when to run ♪

♪ You never count your money ♪

♪ When you're sittin' at the table ♪

♪ There'll be time enough for countin' ♪

♪ When the dealin's done ♪

♪ You've got to know when to hold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to fold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to walk away ♪

♪ Know when to run ♪

Great Scott, a 100,000 in silver coin.

Hot diggity dog!

Yeehaw, we're rich!

Silver coins, my butt!

It's the old washers in the money bag trick again!

Mount up.

What are you doing, Lee Bob?

Just in case.

Ah, ah!

Ahhh!

Hey, Brady!

I didn't catch you with your pants down, did I?

Lute!

Easy come, easy go.

Face it, Hawkes, I'm the better poker player

and I'm going to that game in San Francisco!

Lute!

That's my money!

Cantrell!

So that's where he had it.

Let's go.

You sure you're up to this, Burgundy?

I'd feel a lot better if I had my own clothes on.

You want to be there just as bad as he does, don't you?

Let me tell you something, Ethan.

Hawkes did right by going on ahead of us.

What if I'd up and left with him?

Wouldn't be the first time I was out on my own.

In a way, Hawkes and I are cut from the same blanket.

This could be our last chance at the big score.

We got to go for it.

Dammit, Henry,

I told you not to bring that horse in here anymore!

Just one beer, George, and I swear I'm on my way.

Yeah, all right, one more.

Then you're outta here.

Well, that's what they call ambience.

Oh!

Oh!

Oh.

Easy come, easy go.

Did you have to shoot my motorcycle?

Shut up.

I could crush you like a wormy apple.

But I won't.

Boys, let him know how lucky he is.

Come on.

I told you he tied that rope too high.

Well, we got him, didn't we?

Look at that.

Someone's in trouble, we'd better help.

Come on.

Come on!

Wait a minute!

Where's my actor?

Cut it, cut it!

Hold it!

Cut it!

Cut it!

Mark!

Mark!

Yes, Sir?

They've sent us another actor over here

that can't even ride!

Well, they all say they can't wear the mask

and ride at the same time.

Well, that doesn't make any difference! The sun is out!

Ethan?

Mark McCain!

How you doing?

How are ya?

How you doing?

Wait a minute, you both know each other?

Why, sure.

Ethan's partnered with one of my pa's best friends.

Hey, Brady said your pa really helped him down in Juarez.

Yeah, I heard about that.

Well, what do you know about that?

Oh, uh, D.W., this is Ethan Cassidy.

Howdy-do, Sir.

Honored, Sir.

Happy to know you.

Say, you making one of those moving pictures here?

Yes, you might say we're making one of those

moving pictures.

Hey, you ride real great.

We need great new cowboys.

This is a brand new business.

You could make a fortune in this game, son.

Well, that's an honor, Sir, and I appreciate it,

but I'm on my way to San Francisco there

with Miss Burgundy Jones, so.

Heck, Mark here's a better hand than I could ever be anyway.

Well, we want to thank you,

the both of you, anyway.

Thanks a lot.

Thanks for saving Silver here, he's very valuable.

Have a nice trip!

Alan.

Mark.

Yes, Sir?

Put on the mask.

Put it on.

You mean... Yes, I mean put on the mask!

Sir!

Put it on, we have go, the sun's out!

Sir, yes, Sir.

Original positions, let's go!

Let's go!

All right, everybody, original positions!

You Indians back there, stay Indians!

All right!

Let's go!

All ready?

Number one position!

Am I in my position?

I got a plan for you.

Bath, dear?

Ah!

I could do this every day for the rest of my life.

Why don't you shut up and pass me that tequila?

You're a humorless stump, you know that, Elroy?

Stump?

You calling me a stump?

Yeah.

Get outta the tub, you skinny twig!

Twig?

That's right. You calling me a twig?

Get outta the tub!

All right.

You're gonna pay for this!

Lee Bob, I'm gonna teach you a lesson

you won't soon forget.

Hold this.

Let go of me!

You started it!

All right!

All right, you're asking for it now, boy.

I'll tell you what!

Here we are surrounded by beautiful muchachas

and you two can't keep your hands off each other?

I oughta kill you both just for being

two big dumb redneck peckerwoods.

Tequila.

Have a seat.

Uh...

Por que your name?

No, Sir.

Hold onto that thought.

Where are you going now, Lee Bob?

Uh, me and my supper are about to part company.

Takes a real hombre to hold his liquor

and hold his women.

Sorry, boys, just passing through!

Keep your seat, keep your seat!

Ow!

Catch him!

Kill him!

Get off of me!

Hey!

Woo!

Get off of me!

Psst!

Oh!

He's getting away!

He doesn't even have the money, you idiots!

Hey, hey!

Hey!

Well, Ethan Cassidy, I'll be damned.

Long time no see, boys.

Hey, Ethan, what brings you here?

I'm on my way to San Francisco.

How come you guys are off the range?

Ah, we quit that sorry outfit a long time ago.

We're putting on rodeos now.

This is all ours, it's our stock.

That's great!

Excuse me, boys.

Look at him work, huh?

Just gets better and better.

Yeah.

If there's a better horse trainer around,

I don't believe I've met him.

Hello, Doug.

Oh, Miss Burgundy.

Well!

How you doing, Miss Burgundy?

Fine.

You two know each other?

You bet we do.

How you feeling, Ethan?

I'm feeling pretty good.

Why?

'Cause I just entered you in the saddle bronc riding

and you better win.

Now, hold on, I'm no bronc rider.

You are today.

I spent every last penny we had to enter you.

Woo-ee!

Well, we brought a rough bunch of broncs.

Good luck, cowboy.

Now, why'd you go do a fool thing like that for?

'Cause we don't have a choice.

Now, you get out there and ride that bronc.

It's about time you started

pulling your own weight in this outfit.

Hyah, hyah!

Come here, hyah!

Besides, if you don't win,

we're not gonna have enough money to get to San Francisco.

Well, if I'm gonna climb up on a wild horse,

I'm gonna wet my whistle and loosen up my joints.

Yeah, you go do that.

Yeah.

Ladies and gentlemen of the press,

it is my pleasure to introduce to you.

Mr. Diamond Jim Brady!

Diamond Jim, Sir, what brings you to Leadville?

Diamond Jim, right here.

Ladies and gentlemen, I'm on my way to Virginia City,

Nevada, where I personally will be involved

in promoting the world championship heavyweight prizefight

between Gentleman Jim Corbett

and the legendary, the Boston strongman himself,

John L. Sullivan.

First fight of its kind anywhere in the world!

A fight where gloves will be used instead of bare knuckles.

For the first time to be held under the rules

of the respectable and famous Marquess of Queensbury..

It's her!

The Tennessee farm girl, Melody O'Rourke!

Gentlemen, I'm not through yet.

See you later, Diamond Jim.

Good luck in Virginia City, Mr. Brady.

Yes?

Who is that woman?

Temperance lady.

Hottest preacher on the circuit since Billy Sunday.

I told you we shouldn't have stopped in this one horse town.

Who is financing this movement?

Diamond Jim.

Burgundy Jones from Oklahoma Territory.

How do you do?

This day is definitely looking up.

Hey, Mister, you want to buy some firecrackers?

What in the world would I want with firecrackers?

How about a watch?

No, I don't want to buy a watch.

Now, go away, son, you're bothering me.

Then how about pinching some pennies?

You any good?

Yes, Sir, that's how I make my living.

I could use a kid like you.

Dang it!

Ethan! There you are.

Hell, this is your lucky day. It's his lucky day, isn't it?

Yeah. How do you figure that?

Well, you drew Widowmaker.

Widowmaker?

That doesn't sound so good.

No, it's good.

And it's bad.

Mm.

It's good 'cause you can score real high

on a horse like Widowmaker.

It's bad 'cause no one has ever actually scored on him.

Now, he'll come flying outta there a-kickin'

and then he'll duck back on you

and if you ain't ready, he'll drive your head

right into the ground.

Then he'll rear back and jump up and down on you.

If I didn't know better,

I'd think he actually enjoys it.

I believe he does.

He's a rank one, all right.

He almost killed that fellow in Laramie, didn't he?

Yeah, he sure did.

Well, can I buy you guys um...

Bartender, I may need a little help.

Bartender, let me have a beer, please.

My friends, today liquor will flow in Leadville,

but not in this tent.

Today we shall flood the streets with the devil's drink!

What you need is a good man to keep you out of trouble,

miss goody-two-shoes.

The name is Melody O'Rourke.

Whoa, whoa!

Hold that.

Young lady, I know you mean well,

but my partner did that to you for your own good.

It's just not a good idea

to get between these cowboys and their refreshments

on a national holiday.

Any day is a good day for redemption, Sir,

and I'll thank you to untie me.

Boys, this is Melody O'Rourke.

Temperance lady.

I knew that.

Oh, well, we'll leave her to you, then, Ethan.

Though I expect you'll have better luck on Widowmaker.

Better luck on Widowmaker.

I'm very flattered you remembered me, Mr. Cassidy.

That was very gallant, the way you rescued me.

Yes, Ma'am.

What's this Ma'am business?

You know my name's Melody.

Miss O'Rourke, I thought we had an agreement.

You can do all the damn preaching you want,

but no shenanigans with the ax.

Sometimes I just get plumb carried away.

Well, I'm gonna have to ask you to come along with me now.

I hope to see you again, Ethan.

That'd be nice, Melody.

You're wasting your time, cowboy.

This one don't like men.

Oh, I like men, I just don't like you.

And you can take that personally.

Come on, Miss O'Rourke,

you've caused enough trouble for one day.

Let's go, ladies!

Fear these words!

Ah, shut up.

Let 'em ride!

Hang on, Saul!

Nice ride, cowboy!

He scored an 82, not bad!

How 'bout that?

That didn't look so bad.

Here.

Put these on.

They'll help.

$5000 in prize money

to be split evenly between four events.

That's not bad wages for only 10 seconds work.

Hey, Lute, bet the ranch on Widowmaker.

He's never been ridden.

Widowmaker, huh?

You'll go far, Kid. See what else you can find out.

Next up is Ethan Cassidy from...

Where are you from, Ethan?

Montana, Big Horn, Montana.

Big Horn Montana!

Folks, he's gonna need a big horn

'cause he's up on Widowmaker!

Good luck, cowboy!

Hang in there, Ethan!

Looks like he's earning his money

while he's still in the chute!

Boys,

I got $500 says that cowboy can't ride old Widowmaker there.

I'll take that bet.

Hiya, Hawkes.

That's it, son, just take your time!

Get everything just right!

Now, now, Brady, just take it easy.

Hey, I didn't steal your money.

You didn't steal my money?

No.

No, I sure didn't.

I need my money.

All right, now.

He did it!

He did it!

Ethan Cassidy has ridden Widowmaker!

Well, that's another $500 you owe me.

Where's my money?

Hey, whoa!

Whoa!

He's fallen off!

Come on and help that cowboy!

Go ahead.

I'll just wait here for you.

The foot, get the foot!

Get his foot loose.

You okay?

Yeah.

Widowmaker is a great name for that horse, isn't it?

A great horse for that name.

Thought you were on your way to San Francisco.

I am.

So is Lute Cantrell.

He's got our money.

Damn!

You know, when you left us back there,

I didn't care if I ever saw you again.

But I gotta admit,

you looked pretty good coming off of that fence.

Hey, thanks for coming back.

Well, look at this.

Brady.

Glad to have you back.

Brady?

Brady Hawkes?

It's certainly a pleasure to meet a man

of your legendary skills.

Diamond Jim has graciously offered Ethan and me

a ride to Virginia City.

I'm promoting the biggest prize fight of the century.

It'd be my pleasure to have you join us.

Well, I'm not sure we'll have time to enjoy that event.

But we certainly appreciate the ride to Virginia City

and then we can catch the train on to San Francisco.

My man has established a camp just outside of town.

I'm not fond of these small town hotels.

It would be my pleasure to have you join us for dinner.

Sure.

Brady, I want you to see my new coach.

Just had it shipped in from Washington.

They say Teddy Roosevelt rode in it once.

Not that I believe that.

So where have you been?

And where'd you get that outfit?

Give a lady some credit.

This ain't my first rodeo.

By the way, you won.

That's good.

Because Lute stole our stake.

Don't talk to me about sin.

I don't want to see you in this town anymore.

Young lady!

Young lady, I told you there'd be trouble.

I know you have a mission, but cowboys will be boys.

I've tangled with the devil before, Sir.

Well, why don't you do it in somebody else's town?

Come on!

Come on, Ladies, get on that wagon

before somebody gets hurt.

Gents, we'll hitch up these ladies' wagons.

Could they ride along with you?

They could sure use an escort.

Bring 'em along, the more the merrier.

Always room for a fair maiden.

Miss Burgundy.

That two-wheeled rat is firing at us!

That's all right, boys.

I don't think we're in much jeopardy.

Let's go get him.

He's uh...

He's a little better shot than we thought.

Where is he?

I can't see him.

Ah, what the hell.

Adios, boys!

All right, which one of you fellas am I riding with?

Nobody.

We can't make time doubled up.

Well, you can't expect me to walk!

'Cause I ain't walking out here in the middle of nowhere!

No, Sir, I don't think so.

That's right, I don't think.

But I will.

In fact, I think I'll start walking.

Maybe even running.

I'm feeling pretty frisky.

Feeling real good.

Legs moving good, yes, Sir.

Okay, cowboy, hit it!

Keep it going, cowboy!

Come on, come on, keep it going!

Yeah, woo!

Hey!

Ow!

Get your grimy mitts off of them rolls, Sailor.

One of these times, Cookie, I'm gonna stick that

spatula in your gizzard.

Yeah, well, until you do,

you just stay away from my tent!

Go on!

Ooh!

I would love to give that fool a whiff of gun smoke.

Run his maverick butt

right off of this wagon train.

'Course, he's probably already wanted dead or alive

by some lawman.

I wish Diamond Jim'd get rid of him,

settle down in some big valley,

build a little house in the prairie

surrounded by high chaparral.

Oh, that'd be a real bonanza for me.

I'm getting too old for this wild, wild west.

Hell.

Oh!

Better get them dogies rolling

before these steaks start turning into rawhide.

Ooh, Cookie, you certainly have done yourself

proud this evening.

Thank you, Ma'am.

It must have cost a fortune.

I'm a great believer in beefsteak.

I don't believe a working man can live without it.

Cookie, you look so familiar to me.

Did you used to be with a cattle outfit?

Things got too rowdy with that wild bunch.

The truth is, Diamond Jim made him a better offer.

Well, that, too, Ma'am.

That, too.

Enjoy your meal.

Cassidy, you sure you won't change your mind

and come join us?

Well, I appreciate the offer, Diamond Jim,

but evening's coming on and

those ladies are camped out alone,

so I think I'll just go over and check on 'em.

Well, give them my regards.

I believe your young man is smitten.

He's always had an eye for the ladies.

Miss Burgundy, what business are you in

that brings you an association with Mr. Hawkes?

Are you a gambler also?

All women are gamblers whether they know it or not.

And in this case, I know it.

And I'm backing Mr. Hawkes in the last legal poker game

in this country.

Oh, yes, the one in San Francisco.

High stakes, as I recall.

It's a shame I can't figure a way to promote it,

but poker's not a spectator sport.

Truly the excitement of the game is in the playing,

not the watching.

Perhaps after supper you gentlemen

would care to play a few hands?

Well, if Mr. Hawkes wouldn't mind

playing a game with an amateur.

It'd be my pleasure.

As your business manager, I think I should remind you,

Mr. Hawkes is a professional.

Well, it's just a friendly game.

Oh, friendly game.

♪ Rock of ages cleft for me ♪

♪ Let me hide myself in Thee ♪

♪ Let the water and the blood ♪

♪ From Thy wounded side which flow'd ♪

♪ Be of sin the double cure ♪

♪ Safe from wrath and make me pure ♪

That's some fine singing, fine singing.

Good harmony.

Those old hymns are the best, aren't they?

Supper's ready.

Would you care to join us, Mr. Cassidy?

Have you had your supper, Ethan?

Well, actually, no.

Oh, then join us, please.

It's not fancy, but you're more than welcome to it.

Well, in that case, I'm most obliged.

Uh, but first, let us pray.

Dear Lord, let the hearts and minds of the

sinners and drinkers of Virginia City be open

to our words and deeds.

We ask this in your name

and God bless this food unto our bodies.

Amen.

Amen.

That's straight.

You win.

Again.

Gentlemen, what do you say let's call it a night?

It is getting late.

Whatever you'd like.

I'd like Miss LaRosa not to know about this.

My father was a Saturday night man.

He slept his hangovers through a life of Sundays.

Pretty soon it was every day of the week,

me and my mother dragging him out of the saloon.

Then Carrie Nation, the great temperance preacher,

came to our town of Mount Eagle.

When I heard her words, I knew right then

I had a purpose and a cause.

And it was that cause that got you tossed out of Leadville

and it's gonna get you run out of Virginia City.

Johnson, you had to show up here!

Come on, Melody.

Take old Sailor's evil whiskey away from him.

Come on, girl!

$20,000.

I'll have Sailor get the strongbox

and cash in your chips.

Sailor!

Sailor!

Uh, excuse me, Sir, but your friend is

over by our tent and he seemed to be quite drunk.

I'm terribly sorry.

I'll take care of it.

Well, now we know where Sailor is.

If you'll excuse me.

Ethan's over there, too.

Diamond Jim has invited us here personally, Sir,

and you're drunk.

Well, listen to psalm-singing sister!

Ain't we the pious little girl all of a sudden?

Why don't you just leave!

Leave?

I'll leave when I'm damn good and ready!

The lady asked you to leave.

You stay out of this, cowboy!

My pants!

Look what she done to my pants!

Oh, you standing up for the little girl, are you, cowboy?

Are you all right?

'Cause you're about to wish you hadn't.

Sailor!

Sailor!

Sailor!

There seems to be a difference of opinion here.

You got that right.

Well, this is no time or place to settle our differences.

You got a better idea?

Well, as a matter of fact, I do.

Your friend Cassidy here seems to have taken

an obvious dislike to my associate, Mr. Johnson.

He's got a bit mouth! Ah, easy, gentlemen!

Easy, easy, easy, easy!

In as much as you're a gambling man, I have a thought.

What's on your mind?

Well, if Mr. Cassidy agrees,

I can arrange a small, say, three round

exhibition bout between you and Sailor here

before the Corbett-Sullivan fight.

Why wait? Let's just settle it right now.

Because I can't promote it!

Mr. Hawkes cleaned me out at poker tonight.

What do you say, Mr. Hawkes?

How about a bet between the boys

for the amount of money I lost tonight in the poker game?

Take that bet.

I'll fight you any place, any time.

I feel it only fair to tell you,

Sailor was the middleweight Atlantic fleet champion

all four years he was in the Navy.

Was!

Undefeated.

Well, that's not fair.

What kinda wager is that?

Well, I'm willing to give odds.

What kind?

Three to one.

And your man doesn't even have to beat him,

all he has to do is stay in the ring with him

for three rounds.

Conscious, of course.

Make it five to one, an even hundred thousand dollars.

It's a bet.

Goodnight, Miss Burgundy.

Sailor.

See you in the ring, Cassidy.

Three rounds.

Nothing to it.

Hop out, darling.

We're supposed to be looking for Ethan, Daddy.

Darling, you know you're my one and only

and I'd do most anything for you.

But when it comes to the manly art of fisticuffs,

you take the hindquarters.

What are you saying, Daddy?

I'm saying there ain't no way I'm gonna

miss this here fight.

Daddy!

Regardless.

Here we are.

Miss Burgundy.

I'd like to wish you very good luck tonight, Miss Burgundy.

Think you'll be needing it.

Oh, I don't know about that, Diamond Jim.

Ethan's carved up like a Greek god.

I think my boys will do very fine.

Well, it's possible.

It's possible.

'Course, that's what General Custer said.

Mm-hmm, so did Crazy Horse.

It's now my privilege to introduce to you a man

as well known as the Wild West itself!

Gambler, gunfighter, lawman, and now sportswriter

for the New York Telegraph,

formerly of Deadwood, Dodge City, and Tucson,

the one, the only Bat Masterson!

Thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen.

It's a pleasure for me to be here tonight,

back in the west again,

where you know I spent so much of my earlier life.

Now, ladies and gentlemen, a three round grudge match

in the true western tradition,

the memory of which I so deeply cherish.

From New York City, Sailor Johnson,

the US Navy Fleet Champion versus Ethan Cassidy!

Did you hear that, Daddy?

Ethan's here.

Well, let's go get him and bring him back to Texas.

Now, hold on, little girl.

I reckon we can watch the boy fight a few rounds,

see what he's made of.

But Daddy you promised!

Now, don't push me, Ruby Roy.

You're too emotional about this boy.

It's just not healthy.

Let's see if we can find a seat here.

Sir, let my daughter sit in that seat, would ya?

The legendary Bat Masterson, ladies and gentlemen.

♪ He wore a cane and derby hat ♪

♪ They called him Bat ♪

♪ Bat Masterson ♪

Now, what is this for?

I don't know.

One of the men in Gentleman Jim Corbett's dressing room

said we should do this.

It's not gonna help anyway.

Are you worried, Brady?

I mean, 'cause if you are, rest easy,

'cause I feel really good.

I feel really good.

Ethan, I'm glad you feel good,

but sooner or later we have to accept the fact

that this Sailor is a professional fighter.

Come on, Brady.

Look, I'm in the best shape of my life.

What do you mean?

This guy just bit off a little bit more than he can chew.

I think I can take him.

I promise I'll take him.

Might let him have the first round.

Nah, I'll just knock him out.

Yeah, you do that.

You know, I think this is gonna help.

I won't hurt him so bad.

Come to wish me luck, have you?

No.

Actually, I've come to ask a favor of you, Percival.

I told you my real name in confidence

and in a moment of weakness.

Don't you ever call me that in public.

Don't fight Ethan Cassidy.

You are a trained boxer, you could kill him.

I could and I might.

Don't you understand, Sailor?

This is all my fault.

Ethan was only doing what any gentleman would have done,

standing up for a lady.

Oh, get down off your high horse with me.

I was there, remember?

When you was trailing the fleet up and down the east coast?

That was a long time ago.

I have seen the light and I pray that one day you will, too.

And now, ladies and gentlemen,

our first event of the evening!

Sailor Johnson from New York City

and Ethan Cassidy, a cowboy from somewhere in Montana!

Your referee this evening, Mr. Armand Gemmerman!

Ethan, I'm not kidding.

You better run from this guy.

Can't do that.

Look at all the people here.

There he is, Daddy!

Oh, isn't he beautiful?

Let's go get him!

Sit tight there, little girl, sit tight.

I want to watch my boxing first.

Let's go!

All right, over here.

Let's go.

Miss Burgundy.

Why don't you introduce me to your friend?

Why, certainly.

Melody O'Rourke, may I present to you

Mr. William Barclay Masterson.

Better known as Bat.

My pleasure, Miss.

Bat Masterson, the famous journalist?

Well, I'm impressed that you know me.

Well, in my profession it always helps

to be written about in the right circles.

And what might your profession be?

The temperance movement, Mr. Masterson.

The temperance movement.

Well, of course, the temperance movement.

I hope you close down every saloon

from here to California,

except, of course, the ones that I frequent.

Would you care to join us?

Oh, thank you.

Fighters, center of the ring!

Fight fair, have a good fight.

Shake hands.

Miss Burgundy.

You, get out of my way.

Let's go.

Cassidy!

Tear him up!

Run!

I told you to run!

Run!

I told you you can't fight this guy like a lumberjack!

Move, move!

Yeah, I'm beginning to understand that.

Okay, I'll move, move!

No.

Huh?

Sit down.

Down in front.

Ruby Roy, I don't think this husband of yours

is doing very well.

Well, he'll get him, Daddy.

He'll get him, you just wait and see.

He'll tear him up.

Don't toy with the kid, Sailor.

Put him away.

Now!

I'll take him, Jim.

See that you do.

Was this an act of desperation, Miss Burgundy,

or do you know something that I don't know?

Right now I'd say your bet with Diamond Jim is

in jeopardy.

You may be right.

We must have faith.

Faith?

Oh, I like that.

Faith.

But right now we need more than that.

We need a miracle.

Okay, let's go, let's go!

Come on.

Listen to me, listen to me.

You wanted him to have round one, he took it.

Let's go.

How do you feel?

Where's my hat?

Run!

Run!

Do what I told you!

Stay away from him!

Move around, Ethan!

Move around!

That's right, move!

Move!

That's right, yes!

Keep moving!

Interesting technique.

I don't think I've ever seen that before.

Giddy-up, cowboy!

I thought you wanted to fight so damn bad.

Come on, you varmint.

You afraid of an old man?

I thought I was gonna be fighting a cowboy, not a coward!

Stay back!

Coward?

Oh, yes, yes, come on!

Come on!

Want some more?

Look, Daddy!

Ethan's stunned him.

If he did, Sugar, he did it with his chin.

Ha!

Hit him!

Get him!

Go get him now!

Go get him now!

Go get him, Ethan!

Come on, Ethan!

Ethan!

One!

Two!

Three!

Come on, Ethan, get up!

Four!

Five!

Over here, come this way! Come over here.

Oh, Ethan, get up!

Ethan get up!

Six!

Seven!

Ethan.

Hey, be careful.

Be careful now!

Sit down, sit down.

Listen to me.

You may just get your miracle yet.

It's all right, you're doing good.

Brady.

Your boy doesn't seem to be holding up too well.

He's doing the best he can, that's all he can do.

I've seen this Sailor Johnson in action before.

Good pugilist, but he's got an Achilles heel.

What is it?

Before he throws a right,

he'll roll his left shoulder.

Every time?

Every time.

You hear that?

What?

Look, stay away from him if you can.

If you can't, watch that left shoulder.

Come on.

Let's go.

Ethan!

Ethan!

What?

What?

Yeah.

Uh...

Yes!

Yes!

Get him, Ethan!

Get him, Ethan!

Cover up, Sailor!

Cover up, Sailor!

That a boy, Ethan!

That's my husband!

Ethan!

Look out!

Hit him, Sailor!

No!

One!

Two!

Three!

He's finished.

It's a knockout!

And the winner is Sailor Johnson!

Sailor Johnson has defeated Ethan Cassidy!

Brady, is he okay?

Brady! Burgundy!

Ladies and gentlemen, sinners take heed!

Excuse me.

Excuse me!

Excuse me!

Excuse me!

Ethan!

How'd I do?

Not very good, Honey. We gotta get out of here.

Come on.

Can I go get him him now, Daddy?

All right, Darling, go get him.

That is the road to hellfire and damnation!

Out of my way, poster girl.

Now, you take heed of this, too, little sister.

You're standing in the way of me and

my husband, Ethan Cassidy!

Husband?

I doubt very seriously that man would marry you.

Yeah!

I want that man there, Ethan Cassidy.

And you too, Hawkes.

You're in big trouble.

That's just what we need! The judge is here.

Let's go.

Let's go.

Ladies, break it up, please!

Stay out of my fight!

Where am I going?

Come on, Melody!

Come on!

Get her!

Melody!

Put it to her, Honey!

Put it to her!

That Bean family's starting to get on my nerves.

Lucky punch.

You're lucky it didn't happen two rounds sooner.

Brady, there's some horses.

Let's take them and go, come on.

One thing I am not is a horse thief.

That buggy looks awfully tempting, though.

Brady, can you drive that thing?

Well, it can only go forward or backwards.

Either way, we're out of this town.

Ethan, crank it up.

What?

Well, I hope you can drive it, Brady.

The only hope now to get our money back

is to beat Lute to San Francisco.

Yeah, there she goes!

Come on, come on.

Go, go!

Yeah, I think I'm starting to

get the hang of this thing now.

Well, that's good, 'cause if we don't get there

by nine o'clock when the game starts,

all this is for nothing.

No, I figure we're somewhere around in here

and it's my best guess that we need to head for

San Francisco in that direction.

Hey!

I don't need a damn map to tell me which way to go.

We head west.

And that way is west, you moron.

Hyah!

Hey!

Hey, old-timer!

How far is it to San Francisco?

That'll be mister to you.

Oh, it'll take you about three days by horse.

Brown, look at that, would you?

Bad enough we got all them horseless carriages.

Now, what do you suppose they call that?

Two-wheeled horse?

No, it's too ugly to be a horse.

Whoa, hey, hey, hey!

Hey, hey, hey!

Hey, hey, hey!

Hey, Mister.

Hey, Mister!

Mister, call off your dog.

You know, Brown's got a mind of his own.

I never interfere.

Hey, hey, hey!

Hey, hey!

Hey, get, hey!

Good boy.

Yeah.

What the hell do you call that thing?

A motorcycle.

It's called a motorcycle.

Say, you mind coming over here and

giving me a hand with this thing?

Oh, I wouldn't touch it, no.

It's bad enough having to look at it.

'Course, if it was a horse, I'd gladly lend you a hand

or a mule.

If it was a horse, you wouldn't have to be pushing it,

would you, you'd be riding it.

With a mule you might have to push.

Mules'll do that, they'll balk on you.

Hey.

You got any gasoline?

Say what?

I said, you got any gasoline?

Got gas, six cents a gallon.

Got a room, 50 cents a night.

Got supper, 40 cents a plate.

Got water, it's free.

Oil, it's a nickel.

Yeah, fine, just give me the gasoline.

Yes, Sir.

Uh, have you got any facilities?

Facilities?

Yeah.

Outhouse right over yonder.

Ah.

Hey, hey!

Dollar in advance.

A dollar?

You're charging me a dollar to use the outhouse?

You betcha.

Commode like that be worth it's weight in gold.

Just a matter of timing.

Here.

You're an old thief.

The Lord loves a cheerful giver.

Hey!

Oh, sorry.

Ugh.

Ain't paying no dollar just to answer the call of nature.

Lookie here!

Go get the horses.

Say.

That belong to you?

You might say that.

Brown, Brown, that's all right.

Just let them boys work it out for themselves.

Oh, that old boy ought to lead with his left.

Huh?

He...

Cade!

You just say the word

and I'll blow his spleen through his spine.

Okay, Brown.

Old Brown prefers a fair fight.

Elroy!

The horse collar!

Pull over close, now.

Get me close.

Ethan, get back in here!

Ethan!

Elroy, the money!

Yeehaw!

Sorry, boys, looks like we'll be playing

in San Francisco after all!

Shoot!

I have had it with you, Cantrell!

Yeah, that's Brown.

Once he likes you, he's your friend forever.

Oh, what difference does it make anyway?

Every time I get my hands on that money,

they take it away from me

or you do.

That's because you took it from me!

After you took it from me!

Why don't we take it from them?

Okay.

Yeah.

I like it.

Uh, what about him?

Leave him.

He's an idiot.

Well, Sir, the end of the west is near.

Huh?

The...

Never mind.

Woo-hoo!

Did you see that, Brady?

Just like leaning down and picking up your hat.

Pretty slick work all the way around, I'd say.

You two are mighty proud of yourselves, aren't you?

Yeah.

You're lucky you didn't break your fool neck, Ethan.

Hey, you can keep staring back there all you like,

Miss Burgundy, you're not gonna see anything.

We left those boys in the dust.

Yeah, well, I'll still feel a lot better

once we get to San Francisco.

Give me that.

You don't need that either.

I'm sick of this horse collar.

I'm gonna put the money in a satchel.

We're almost there.

See, I told you there was nothing to worry about.

Hold on, Cade!

Look, we're gonna get there.

We may not be first, but we're gonna get there.

Hot damn!

We made it with time to spare.

Does anybody see Lute or Cade?

No sign of 'em.

Let's get to the hotel.

Okay, but be careful.

Keep your eyes open.

Those boys could be anywhere.

There they are!

Come on, come on!

Wait a minute.

Wait a minute. Lute, take some men and follow them.

Come on!

You four, go around that corner and cut him off!

The rest of you boys stay with me.

That money is not getting into that hotel!

Come on!

The last legal poker game in America.

Who would have thought it?

At least we're going out with a bang.

That's the way life should be lived.

No half measures.

Are you absolutely certain that Brady Hawkes

will be joining us?

You took him apart in London.

Believe me, he'll want another shot at you.

I hope so.

Well, you can forget Hawkes.

Without a Maverick in it, you don't have a game.

Or a Masterson.

Bat, how are you?

Sir Colin, permit me to present the ever-humble

Bart Maverick.

How do you do?

My pleasure, Sir Colin.

Well, now we have a Masterson, a Maverick,

a British knight, hopefully Brady Hawkes.

Who will be our fifth?

Gentlemen,

I think you're in for an interesting surprise.

Burgundy, Burgundy.

Okay, Brady, what are we gonna do now?

I don't know, but we better find another way

into that hotel.

Yeah, and fast.

Yeah.

Come on.

Ooh, that's not gonna work.

Oh, oh!

Hurry, hurry, hurry.

End of the line, Hawkes.

Get out of the way, Chinaman, or you're dead.

Death is nothing to one who does not fear it.

Oh, good.

Then I won't feel too bad about this.

Caine, my friend, thanks.

I thought our luck had finally come to an end.

The restoration of harmony is thanks enough.

And as for luck,

some of these here tonight will find it has abandoned them.

But those who have faith will find the true path.

Faith we have.

Time we don't.

Of course, it also helps to have the eyes of the eagle

and the reflexes of a cat.

Caine, my friend, you've helped us once

and I may have to ask you to help us again.

Whoa!

In Chinatown there is always a way.

I will take you to Master Ping, my cousin.

Come.

Now let's go play some cards, huh?

Almost to the end of our journey.

The ultimate quest has no ending.

That is what gives the quest its ultimate value.

I love it when he talks like that.

Where do you think you're going?

Why, I'm a guest at this hotel.

Okay, Mr. Ping, we're counting on you.

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

Where are you going?

Oh, deliver food.

Uh, cook over there bring here new idea.

No charge deliver food.

Hey, pardon!

Where I come from, we don't call that food.

We call that fish bait.

Well, pilgrim, maybe it wasn't prepared right.

Hey!

Oh, what'd you do?

Beat it!

I'm surrounded by idiots!

Wouldn't leave that out too long.

Hey.

Any sign of 'em?

No.

What happened to the men?

Don't ask.

Where have you been?

Chasing them through Chinatown.

Chinatown?

Yeah.

Ethan Cassidy!

Oh!

I've found you!

I would know those boots of yours anywhere.

Daddy Bean!

Daddy Bean!

Nobody move!

What?

You must feel lucky, Cowboy.

Ethan!

Don't!

Ruby Roy!

Stand back.

These men obviously got a disagreement to settle.

It's all over, Mr. Hawkes.

You just missed a great fight, Hawkes.

I bet.

Who won?

Corbett.

Knocked Sullivan out in the 21st round.

My, you're as pretty as ever, Miss Burgundy.

Hawkes.

Give me the money.

What seems to be the problem here?

I am.

Now.

Give the lady the money.

We walk out of here

and nobody gets hurt.

Don't do it.

Now, Hawkes.

Ah!

Nah, it's not the Indian.

Ah!

Seems like he's on my list.

Boys, tag him, tie him, and hold him till I'm ready to go.

Cade Dalton.

And I can take my husband

back to Texas with me?

Honey,

I told you once you're too emotional about this boy.

He's a rambling man.

I say, he'll just take off again.

Marriage is annulled.

Uh, Judge, I'd appreciate if you'd just

make that official.

Yeah.

Annulled!

Thank you, Sir.

Ruby Roy, just as soon as this game is over,

we're heading back to Texas, where we belong.

Daddy Bean, we just traveled all through the west

to San Francisco to find my husband

and now you've just taken him away from me.

Well, I'm not getting in that car!

I don't care!

I'm not going any place without my husband!

Here you go, Ma'am.

Ruby?

I'll be back in a minute, Daddy.

So Butterfingers O'Malley is your mother?

How many people in that game knew about that?

Only me.

She was supposed to give me the cards I needed to win.

No, she was just supposed to make sure you didn't lose.

What's the difference?

This is all for nothing.

What do you mean?

If I can't win on my own, what kind of man am I?

Your mother is not gonna be dealing to me tonight.

This is the most important poker game of my life

and I still don't know whether I can play or not.

Hey, wait a minute.

Let me tell you something.

This is the most important game to me, too.

I was the one that went down to Mexico

and dragged you all the way up to Dodge City.

Yeah, I was the one that rigged the game

so you could win.

Probably didn't have to 'cause you're the best

poker player I ever met in my life.

But I needed some insurance.

See, what you don't know is that tonight

you're gonna be playing for a bunch of kids in an orphanage.

Orphanage?

A bunch of kids who hadn't been dealt a fair hand

since the day they was born.

I'm the only momma they've got

and I'm gonna make damn sure they continue

to have a roof over their head

and the best of life I can possibly give to 'em.

Now, that's what's at stake.

And if those kids aren't enough motivation

for you to play your best in this game tonight,

then you better find something in your heart that is.

'Cause the best four poker players in the world are upstairs

and they're waiting on you.

Daddy Bean always told me when you find the right man,

do what's ever in your heart to bring him home.

You're gonna love Langtry.

Bat, thanks so much for your help.

You and your cane.

I had to.

We needed your money in the game.

It wouldn't be big time poker without Brady Hawkes.

Well put, Bat.

Mr. Hawkes, we meet again.

I'm awfully glad you're here.

Sir Colin Douglas, my partner, Miss Burgundy Jones.

How do you do, Ma'am?

How do you do?

I hope a little luck goes with you this time, Hawkes,

considering we're in your country.

It's a pleasure to meet you, Ma'am.

Bat, shall we?

Miss Burgundy.

So was that him?

That's him.

They call him the Gentleman Gambler.

I can see why.

Don't let those manners fool you.

When he plays, he's vicious.

I go where the Lord sends me and

right now, I'm going to close down that game!

Ladies, Sailor, follow me.

Gentlemen of the press, if you could wait right here.

Not him again.

Sailor has taken his last step for the Devil

and his first step for the Lord.

How do you feel, Sailor?

Like a new man.

Don't you try and stop us, Ethan Cassidy.

We have business here.

Step back, please, we're going to have our picture taken.

Line up, girls.

You get in the front, you're shortest.

Where is she?

Get up there.

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.

My name is Lady Li.

For those who knew him, I was Mr. Paladin's personal dealer.

It will be my pleasure to deal for you.

You gentlemen all know one another.

Oh, yes. Yes, Ma'am, we do.

Mr. Masterson.

Now, gentlemen, my surprise.

Our fifth player.

It gives me great pleasure to present

the President of the United States,

the honorable Theodore Roosevelt.

Masterson.

How nice to see you.

Mr. President, I haven't seen you since Africa.

What a wonderful safari.

Oh, please, please, sit.

Mr. President, I'm surprised to see

that you play poker in public.

I wouldn't miss a chance to compete against the finest.

We welcome your money, Sir.

As long as it is yours and not the taxpayers.

I promise.

My allowance.

Please continue, Miss Li.

The game will be five card stud, check and raise.

The cards are from the late Mr. Paladin's personal stock.

By his rules, the game will be played until sunrise.

When a player loses his stake, he's out of the game.

Buy in is $100,000.

You may purchase your chips now.

I'll be right up, Sailor.

It's such a pleasure to see you again.

So I guess you'll make the headlines

in all the newspapers tonight.

Maybe you'll be bigger than Billy Sunday

and Carrie Nation combined, huh?

And I'm closing down the last legal poker game

in America just to show this country

what it should have done a long time ago.

Melody.

You listen!

First it'll be whiskey and beer

and then every saloon in the country.

It's gonna happen, Ethan.

Tonight is just the beginning.

You just don't understand, do you?

Upstairs right now are the last of the great gamblers,

Brady Hawkes among 'em.

Men who take a lot of pride in their profession.

Winning the last game...

If you want to get your name in the papers

by swinging your ax down on their game,

my friend and my partner, then you go ahead and you do it.

You just remember,

you'll have plenty of games and saloons to close down.

That all lies in front of you. Those men up there,

they're days are done without you.

Without your hands, without your ax.

Times change.

Some of us can't change with 'em.

So you just do what you gotta do.

Running this great country is a gamble.

I mean, after all, politics is about winning and losing.

Hell, we gambled when we split from you boys,

right, Sir Colin?

I mean, it's just like you and your kings

against my deuces.

Now, my deuces are not very powerful,

unless I have a lot of them.

Sir Colin, kings bet.

In honor of King Edward and his fine Edwardian Age

we live in,

my kings bet 5000.

Ah.

Those kings look pretty potent, Sir Colin,

but you, Mr. President,

I think you've got the whole militia buried under that card.

I'm gonna fold.

I'm with you, Bart.

Never did care much for politics.

I'm out.

Well!

I'll call.

Pair of kings.

Bully!

Three deuces!

Let's hear it for the little man.

They brought the President in

and everybody's being real nice to him.

With our money.

He's a hell of a soldier.

If I'd 'a been a younger man,

I'd 'a been right there with him,

one of his Rough Riders.

I'll bet 4000.

Pair of nines.

I'll see that.

Well, as Commander-in-Chief, I order a retreat.

Follow and fold.

I'm strong, Bat, but I am gonna see it.

Last card.

No help.

Thank you.

Three nines.

No help.

I'm out.

You're not alone, Brady.

You know, Brett would have gotten any card he needed.

Damn.

He's just not getting the cards.

It's nice to win, gentlemen.

It reminds me of the time back in Denver,

when the gangsters ran me out of town.

My cards were running as hot as Lillie Langtry's lips.

Gentlemen, with your permission,

a new deck, please, Lady Li.

Here comes trouble.

You're not really gonna do this, are you?

Don't worry.

There'll be no interruptions.

Sailor is guarding the door.

How's he doing?

Not so good.

Three queens.

Well, it's about time for this Maverick

to start drawing some cards.

Jacks and nines.

Beats me.

And me.

Gentlemen, an issue of the utmost importance

has just come up.

I'm terribly sorry, but I am going to have to

leave the competition.

Oh!

It seems that word has leaked out to Mrs. Roosevelt.

I told the little woman that I had some fundraising

to attend to.

Unfortunately, this is the type of fundraising

that she doesn't approve of.

Mr. President, I think we've all been in

similar circumstances before and

I would like to recommend that we allow you

to keep the balance of your stake.

No, no, Sir.

The rules.

Always follow the rules.

This goes to the winner.

No, no, please.

Thank you, gentlemen, Lady Li.

A game enjoyed among men should always

have the highest priority.

Goodnight, all.

Fine man.

Tough job.

Just a pair of threes.

Embarrassing.

But a winner.

Looks like Sir Colin's up about 30,000.

Hmm.

All right, I'll see the 10 and raise my last 10,000.

I'll see ya.

Beats me.

He had 'em. I know he had the flush.

Why did he fold?

Call.

10 high straight.

Full house.

Ooh.

He knew.

I'm definitely not the best poker player

in the Maverick family.

Gentlemen, thank you very much.

Gentlemen, I should like to make a toast

as the end of an era draws to its close.

To Bart Maverick, for carrying on the great name

of his family.

Hear, hear.

To Bat Masterson, an American legend without peer.

And to Brady Hawkes,

a man whose very nature personifies your young and

exciting country.

Thank you, Sir.

Thank you very much, Sir.

Good evening.

Lady Li.

Good evening.

Gentlemen.

We now have three players.

Pair of aces.

Three sevens.

That finishes me.

You know, Brady, it isn't how much luck you have,

it's when you have it.

And right now, my luck seems to be running out on me.

You two are wallowing in it.

Thanks, Bat.

Pleasure.

Thank you, Bat.

Enjoy.

Lady Li.

Mr. Masterson.

Gentlemen.

Sunrise is in 30 minutes.

Just like old times, Hawkes.

Just you and me.

The way it should be.

Cards, gentlemen.

Deuce.

King.

King bets.

I've got a hunch.

20,000.

I'm in.

Pair of deuces.

Pair of kings.

Kings bet.

I do so enjoy royalty.

40,000.

40,000.

King.

Seven.

Kings bet.

Check.

Check.

Last card.

Three deuces.

Two pair, kings and sevens.

Deuces bet.

Well, Sir Colin, kings again.

Could it be that might is right?

Let's see.

40,000.

He's got him.

His three of a kind beat two pair.

We've both er, got just about $150,000.

Time being short,

why don't we play them all?

He's bluffing.

No, he's not.

He's got the cards.

I'll call.

Sorry to do this to you on your home ground,

old boy.

But then again,

there's no good place for defeat.

Full house.

You know, Sir Colin, there are very few things

as satisfying as watching a real artist play

and you are truly that.

One thing that may be, though,

is beating that artist.

Four twos!

He had 'em!

Well played, Hawkes.

You're the best.

Sir Colin, the English,

always a gentleman, even in defeat.

Mr. Hawkes, the money will be in the safe.

Congratulations, Hawkes.

You're up there with the greats.

Thanks, Bat.

I always had a feeling about you, Brady.

You did, didn't you?

Yeah.

You know, Burgundy, I know that part of this

is supposed to be mine, but,

well, I think you have a better use for it than I do.

Gambling's not really about money.

It's just our way of keeping score.

Thanks, Brady.

That's big of you.

Broke again.

Well, I heard they discovered gold in the Yukon.

Let's go!

Ethan.

Uh, thank you, Ma'am.

Gentlemen, I believe the Lord is about to

speak to us directly.

What was that?

Earthquake.

Oh, there's no such things as

earthquakes in San Francisco.

♪ You got to know when to hold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to fold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to walk away ♪

♪ And know when to run ♪

♪ You never count your money ♪

♪ When you're sitting at the table ♪

♪ There'll be time enough for countin' ♪

♪ When the dealing's done ♪

♪ You got to know when to hold 'em ♪

♪ When to hold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to fold 'em ♪

♪ When to fold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to walk away ♪

♪ And know when to run ♪

♪ You never count your money ♪

♪ When you're sitting at the table ♪

♪ There'll be time enough for countin' ♪

♪ When the dealing's done ♪

♪ You got to know when to hold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to fold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to walk away ♪

♪ And know when to run ♪

♪ You never count your money ♪

♪ When you're sitting at the table ♪

♪ There'll be time enough for countin' ♪

♪ When the dealing's done ♪