Original subtitles

- ARE YOU READY, KIDS?

All: AYE, AYE, CAPTAIN!

- I CAN'T HEAR YOU.

All: AYE, AYE, CAPTAIN!

- ♪ OHH... ♪

♪ WHO LIVES IN A PINEAPPLE UNDER THE SEA? ♪

All: SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

- ♪ ABSORBENT AND YELLOW AND POROUS IS HE ♪

all: SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

- ♪ IF NAUTICAL NONSENSE BE SOMETHING YOU WISH ♪

all: SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

- ♪ THEN DROP ON THE DECK AND FLOP LIKE A FISH ♪

all: SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! - READY?

All: SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

- SPONGEBOB

SQUAREPANTS!

[laughing]

♪ ♪

[waves crashing]

[jaunty ukulele music]

♪ ♪

[cranking]

[radio static]

- AH.

THAT'S THE STUFF.

RIGHT THERE.

[sniffs]

SOMETHING DON'T SMELL RIGHT.

SPONGEBOB, SAY, WHAT ARE YOU BURNIN' OUT HERE, BOY?

- [sniffs] HMM.

I'D SAY A HIGH GRADE EXPLOSIVE.

- EXPLOSIVE?

[whooshing]

- [laughing]

ENJOY, EUGENE.

Boom!

- [muffled] PLANKTON!

- [laughing]

- I JUST HAD THAT ROOF REDONE LAST WEEK.

- YOU'LL BE RE-REDOING IT AFTER I'M THROUGH WITH YOU.

- READY AMMUNITION.

FIRE.

- [spitting rapidly]

[peas zipping]

[pots and pans clanging]

OW.

Pop!

- TAKE COVER.

Crash!

OH.

HEH-HEH. IT DIDN'T GO OFF.

[laughs]

ANOTHER DUD, PLANKTON.

- A DUD, HUH?

Buzz!

[mechanical whirring]

- OH, YOU'RE PLAYIN' WITH FIRE NOW, PLANKTON.

- NO NEED TO GET WORKED UP OVER THIS, KRABS.

JUST GIVE ME THE SECRET FORMULA, AND I'LL BE ON MY WAY.

- YOU AIN'T GETTING IT.

- I IMPLORE YOU TO RECONSIDER.

[whirring and groaning]

- GO JUMP OFF A PLANK.

- I HAVE WAYS OF GETTING THE INFORMATION I NEED.

WHERE'S THE FORMULA, KRABS?

- [laughs wildly]

- STILL NOT GONNA TALK, EH, KRABS?

[scraping]

- A-CHOO!

- OKAY, KRABS, I SEE YOU'RE NOT GONNA CRACK.

BUT I DON'T THINK YOUR UNDERLING IS OF THE SAME METTLE.

- I'LL NEVER TALK.

- WE'LL SEE WHAT MR. FEATHER HAS TO SAY ABOUT THAT.

- OKAY. OKAY.

BUT I DON'T KNOW HOW TO GET INTO THE SAFE

BEHIND THE PAINTING IN MR. KRABS' OFFICE

THAT HOUSES THE SECRET FORMULA.

HE WON'T LET ME NEAR IT.

- CLEVER.

BEHIND THE PAINTING, EH, KRABS?

GRRRR...

- INCIDENTALLY, WHAT AM I SMELLING?

YOU GOT SOMETHING BURNING?

- [sniffs]

SMELLS LIKE BLUBBER TO ME.

- BLU-BLU-BLUBBER?

- DADDY.

- [screams]

CALL OFF YOUR DAUGHTER, KRABS.

CALL HER OFF.

- SHE'S A BIG GIRL, PLANKTON.

I HAVE NO CONTROL OVER WHAT SHE DOES.

OH, AND YOU BETTER WATCH OUT.

I THINK SHE'S EXTRA HUNGRY TODAY.

- STAY BACK, WHALE.

I'M PRIVY TO WHAT YOU DO TO ORGANISMS LIKE ME.

I'VE SEEN THOSE DOCUMENTARIES.

- DID HE JUST GO INTO THE FREEZER?

- DON'T SAY IT.

- I PREFER SALAD OVER PLANKTON ANYWAY.

- WHO KNEW PLANKTON WAS SO AFRAID OF WHALES?

[chuckles]

PEARL, ME DARLIN' DAUGHTER,

YOU SAVED ME BUSINESS AND ME FORMULA.

NOW GET US OUT OF THIS TRAP.

- MALL MONEY?

- ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.

YOU'RE GETTING MORE LIKE YOUR OLD MAN EVERY DAY.

- THANKS, DADDY.

Pop!

- WHY DON'T YOU SWING BY THE CHUM BUCKET

ON YOUR WAY TO THE MALL?

GIVE PLANKTON A SCARE.

- DOUBLE MY MALL MONEY.

- GRRR.

YOUR TURN TO CHIP IN, BOY.

SURE.

HERE YOU GO.

BUY YOURSELF SOMETHING PRETTY.

- HEY.

THIS ISN'T MONEY.

- NO, IT'S EVEN BETTER.

THIS IS WHAT MR. KRABS PAYS ME WITH:

MR. KRABS' WACKY BUCKS.

- OH, IT'S ALL STARTING TO CATCH UP WITH ME.

PLEASE, PEARL.

I'LL DO YOUR HOMEWORK FOR YOU.

- NO WAY.

THE CHUM BUCKET IS, LIKE, TOTALLY GROSS.

- HMM.

IN THAT CASE, PEARL,

I'M GONNA NEED TO BORROW ONE OF YOUR DRESSES.

- HUH? - HUB-A-DAH-HUH?

- [panting frantically]

- MY TRIUMPHANT HUSBAND RETURNS.

HOW'D YOU FAIL THIS TIME?

- KRABS HAD A WHALE.

- YOU MEAN HIS BIG, BAD, SCARY TEENAGE DAUGHTER?

- I HEAR THAT MOCKING TONE IN YOUR VOICE, KAREN,

AND I DON'T APPRECIATE IT.

DON'T YOU REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED TO MY ANCESTORS

AT THE HANDS OF THOSE BEASTS?

[shouting and cheering]

[screaming]

- burp!

- OKAY, WHEN YOU NEED A BREAK FROM YOUR DELUSIONAL PARANOIA,

THE TRASH NEEDS SOME ATTENTION.

IT'S RIPENED.

- I'M HUNGRY.

- NO!

[panting frantically]

[whimpering]

THAT SHOULD KEEP HER OUT.

[heavy breathing]

- I WANT PLANKTON MEAT!

- HOLY PROTOZOA.

KAREN!

SHE'S HERE! SHE GOT IN!

- WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

- THERE'S A WHALE IN THE LABORATORY.

- ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?

- SEE FOR YOURSELF.

- NO WHALE IN HERE.

- I SWEAR, A WHALE WAS JUST IN HERE.

SHE WAS NEXT TO THE TRANSMUTATOR.

SHE WAS RIGHT HERE IN THIS SPOT.

HER MOUTH ALL FROTHY,

BLOWHOLE BLOWING.

- OH, THAT'S ENOUGH, PLANKTON.

IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME,

I HAVE TO GET BACK TO MORE PERTINENT BINARY FUNCTIONS.

- KAREN.

KAREN!

- I'M NOT LISTENING.

MM-MM-MM-MM-HMM.

PLANKTON, YOUR DINNER'S READY.

PLANKTON?

PLANKTON, DO YOU HEAR ME?

- YES, I CAN HEAR YOU.

CAN YOU BRING IT UP?

I CAN'T RISK STEPPING INTO THE LIGHT.

THE WHALE MIGHT SEE ME.

[weeps]

- [snickers]

- [groaning]

N-NO! NO! NO! NO!

- [cackling]

- [whimpering]

WHOA.

HEY, GET ME OUT OF HERE!

- [laughing]

- NO. NO.

- [gulps]

- AH!

DUH.

- HIYA, PLANKTON.

GLAD YOU COULD JOIN THE REST OF THE FAMILY.

- GRANDDAD?

- YEP, AND YOU'RE PRETTY BRAVE

STANDING IN THAT THERE GASTRIC ACID.

- GASTRIC ACID?

AH!

- [laughs]

[thunder crashes]

- GAH!

I CAN'T TAKE IT.

[sobbing]

THIS IS DRIVING ME CRAZY.

[sobbing]

- [snickers]

[laughs]

- [sobbing]

WHAT'S THE POINT OF GOING ON?

I'LL JUST BE TORTURED FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE BY THAT WHALE.

Smack!

THAT'S IT. I'M DONE.

THE 4:15 BUS SHOULD BE ALONG ANY TIME NOW.

- HI, PLANKTON.

WHAT YOU DOIN' LAYING HERE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD?

- GO AWAY, CHEESEHEAD.

CAN'T YOU SEE I'M TRYING TO GET RUN OVER?

IN FACT, BETTER YET, JUST STEP ON ME AS HARD AS YOU CAN.

WOULD YOU DO THAT FOR ME?

- I'M SORRY, PLANKTON,

BUT THAT FLIES IN THE FACE OF MY GOOD NATURE.

- FORGET IT, KID.

I'LL JUST WAIT FOR THE NEXT BUS.

GO ON BACK TO THE KRUSTY KRAB AND ENJOY YOURSELF.

- OKAY.

- [laughing]

GOOD-BYE, PIP-SQUEAK.

- SORRY TO INTERRUPT YOUR GLOATING, SIR.

I JUST THOUGHT IT WOULD BE PERTINENT FOR YOU TO KNOW

THAT PLANKTON'S LAYING IN THE STREET, FORLORN.

- [gasps] REALLY?

HE'S A MESS.

[laughs]

- MR. KRABS, I KNOW YOU AND PLANKTON

ARE SWORN ENEMIES AND ALL,

BUT PUTTING ON A DRESS TO FRIGHTEN HIM?

ISN'T THAT TAKING IT A LITTLE TOO FAR?

- NEED I REMIND YOU OF THE FACT THAT YOU DISCLOSED THE LOCATION

OF ME SAFE WHERE I KEEP THE SECRET FORMULA?

- NO NEED TO REMIND ME, SIR.

I BROKE RULE NUMBER TWO OF THE KRUSTY KRAB RULE BOOK:

NEVER DISCLOSE THE LOCATION OF THE SECRET FORMULA.

DON'T WORRY, SIR.

I CAN FIX THIS.

- [sighs]

MAN, WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO GET RUN OVER AROUND HERE?

- HI, PLANKTON.

- WHAT, DO YOU GOT MUD IN YOUR EARS?

TAKE A HIKE.

- OH, YES, I REMEMBER.

BUT VERY QUICKLY, I JUST WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW

THAT THE KRABBY PATTY SECRET FORMULA IS NOT,

I REPEAT, NOT IN THE SAFE BEHIND THE PAINTING AT THE KRUSTY KRAB.

- WHY SHOULD I CARE?

ALL MEANING HAS LEFT MY LIFE

EVER SINCE I'VE BEEN PLAGUED BY THAT BLASTED WHALE.

- IT'S OKAY.

EVERYBODY HAS A SECRET FEAR.

FOR INSTANCE, MR. KRABS' SECRET FEAR IS...

[whispers]

- REALLY?

- MM-HMM.

AND GUESS WHAT ELSE.

THAT WAS MR. KRABS IN A WHALE SUIT

THAT YOU'VE BEEN SCARED OF.

- YOU MEAN, THIS ENTIRE TIME IT'S BEEN KRABS

MASQUERADING AS A WHALE?

WHY, THAT CONNIVING BOTTOM FEEDER.

- WELL LUCKILY, YOU WOULDN'T HAVE ANY USE

FOR SUCH INNOCUOUS INFORMATION, WOULD YOU?

- UH, OF COURSE NOT. [chuckles]

- ALL RIGHTY.

BACK TO YOUR SELF-DESTRUCTIVE BEHAVIOR, PLANKTON.

THANKS FOR THE TALK.

- OH, NO, THANK YOU.

[laughs maniacally]

- HOO-HOO, THIS IS TOO MUCH FUN.

I THINK I FOUND ME SECOND CALLING.

PLANKTON AIN'T EVEN A CHALLENGE NO MORE.

- OH, IS THAT SO.

- PLANKTON? OH, BACK FOR MORE, ARE YOU?

OH, WELL, HERE GOES.

[inhales deeply]

BOO.

- YOU DON'T SCARE ME, KRABS.

- I AIN'T KRABS. I'M... I MEAN,

[changes voice] I'M PEARL, NOT KRABS.

- THE JIG IS UP, KRABS.

I KNOW ALL ABOUT THE SUIT

AND YOUR SECRET FEAR.

- SECRET FEAR?

WHAT ARE YOU TALKIN' ABOUT?

- SEE FOR YOURSELF.

[mechanical whirring]

ENJOY THE SHOW.

- NO.

NO.

NO.

M-M-MAKE IT STOP.

MAKE IT STOP.

- [laughing]

DOESN'T FEEL SO GOOD ON THE OTHER END OF THE STICK,

DOES IT, SCAREDY PANTS?

HA-HA-HA.

I AM LOVING THIS.

- HEY, PLANKTON, IF I WERE YOU, I WOULDN'T BE SO SMUG.

- WHY NOT?

- BECAUSE A HUNGRY POD OF WHALES JUST SHOWED UP

FOR ITS EARLY FEEDING.

- [gasps]

[screams]

NOT ANOTHER FEEDING.

GET ME OUT OF HERE.

[straining]

shoonk!

- OOH, WELL, YOU REDEEMED YOURSELF, BOY.

OKAY, YOU REALLY ARE CREEPING ME OUT NOW.

[jaunty slide guitar music]

♪ ♪

- HELP.

HELP.

- [cackling]

OW, RIGHT IN ME CROW'S NEST.

[groans]

- [gasps]

- MONICA.

- BRAD.

- OH, MONICA.

I THOUGHT I MIGHT NEVER FIND YOU.

I PROMISE NEVER TO LEAVE YOUR SIDE.

- OH, BRAD.

- OH, MONICA.

- DO YOU KNOW WHAT TODAY IS, LITTLE GUY?

- MROW.

- IT'S "TAKE GARY FOR A WALK IN THE PARK" DAY.

- MOH.

[meows]

- ISN'T THIS GREAT, GARY?

A WHOLE PARK FULL OF YOUR OWN SPECIES.

GO AHEAD.

HAVE A GOOD TIME.

[both snoring]

I'LL JUST SIT DOWN FOR A SECOND.

[snores]

- MROW.

- MEOW.

[seesaw squeaking]

- MWOW!

OW-OW-OW-OW.

- HEY, LIGHTWEIGHT,

WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING WITH MY GOIL?

COME ON, MARY, LET'S GO.

- MEOW.

- YOU JUST MADE A BIG MISTAKE, PAL.

[growling]

- SAY GOOD-BYE TO YOUR FRIENDS, GARY.

PLAY TIME'S OVER.

I'VE GOT TO FIX US SOME DINNER.

- MEOW.

- MOW-WOW.

- LET'S GO, MARY.

- HEY, THIS AIN'T OVER, RUNT.

WHEN I GET THROUGH WITH YOUS,

THE DOCTOR WON'T KNOW WHICH SIDE TO SEW YOUR LIPS BACK ON...

TO.

THAT LITTLE RUNT IS GONNA GET WHAT'S COMIN' TO HIM.

- MM-MMM.

SEAWEED NOODLE STEW.

[fast scraping]

- MEOW.

- BON APPETIT, GARY.

I MADE IT WITH EXTRA LOVE.

- MEOW.

[smooching]

- NOT EXACTLY WHAT I HAD IN MIND, BUT KNOCK YOURSELF OUT.

- [smooching]

HUH?

[sighs]

- ONE, TWO, ONE, TWO.

ONE, TWO, ONE, TWO.

ONE, TWO, ONE...

OH, THERE YOU ARE.

THAT SURE WAS A KNOCK-OUT DINNER, EH?

- MEOW.

- COME ON, GARY.

IT'S TIME FOR BEDDIE-BYE.

NIGHT-NIGHT, GARE-BEAR.

[snores]

[seesawing squeaking]

[smooching sounds]

- [snoring]

[foghorn blares]

[yawns]

GOOD MORNING, GARY.

HMM, WHERE IS HE?

OH, HE'S PROBABLY USING HIS SNAIL BOX.

THAT WAS A PRETTY NOODLY STEW HE ATE LAST NIGHT.

PEEK-A-BOO.

HUH, NOT IN HERE EITHER.

GARY?

WHERE ARE YOU?

[gasps]

I'M GONNA HAVE TO TEACH THAT SNAIL

HOW TO CLEAN UP AFTER HIMSELF.

WHAT'S THIS?

SOME SORT OF RANSOM NOTE?

HOLY NEPTUNE.

MY GARY HAS BEEN PET-NAPPED BY A DERANGED SNAIL LOVER!

[panting] DON'T WORRY, GARE-BEAR.

I'LL SAVE YOU.

- MROW?

- MRAH.

- MOW-OW.

- AFTER ME, FELLAS.

- [grunts]

HEY, HOW COME WE DON'T NEVER COME THROUGH THE FRONT, GUYS?

- 'CAUSE BAD GUYS DON'T NEVER USE THE FRONT DOOR.

- WELL, I THINK THAT THAT'S PRETTY RIDICULOUS.

- ALL RIGHT, LISTEN UP.

ANY OF YOUS SEEN A SNAIL COME THROUGH HERE?

ABOUT, UH, YEA TALL, A SHELL, COUPLE OF EYES?

- I THINK YOUS NEED TO BE MORE DESCRIPTIVE.

- UH, OH, OKAY.

UH, LET'S SEE HERE.

UH, THIS PARTICULAR SNAIL THINKS IT'S REAL FUNNY

TO MAKE GOO-GOO EYES AT MY GIRL.

[laughter]

- HEY, WHAT YOU'S GIGGLIN' AT?

THEY'S GIGGLIN' AT ME.

ALL RIGHT, THAT'S IT.

YOU'S ALL GOIN' ON MY LIST.

YOUS GOT THAT?

YOU'RE ON THE LIST.

- [groaning]

[sighs]

- [panting]

GARY?

GARY, WHERE ARE YOU, BUDDY?

[gasps]

SNAIL SLIME.

IT LOOKS LIKE IT COULD BE GARY'S.

THE COLOR IS RIGHT.

CONSISTENCY MATCHES.

NOW FOR THE TRUE TEST.

[splashing]

[smacking lips]

UH-HUH.

[muffled] IT IS GARY'S SLIME.

I'M ON THE TWAIL, GEHWEE.

[grunting]

[barking]

- MEOW.

Bonk!

- WELL, HELLO THERE, LITTLE FELLOW.

ARE YOU A STRAY?

THERE, NOW, ISN'T THAT BETTER?

- MROW. MROW.

- MROW, MROW, MROW, MROW?

- NO, NO, I HAVEN'T SEEN ANY STRAY SNAILS COME IN HERE.

- HE'S TRYING TO PULL A FAST ONE, FELLAS.

WHY DON'T WE GIVE HIM A TASTE

OF OUR SPECIAL BRAND OF SWIFT JUSTICE.

- HEH, THAT'S ENOUGH, BOYS.

I THINK WE'VE DONE A THOROUGH JOB.

- YEAH, LET'S GET BACK TO FINDING THAT SNAIL.

Clang!

- HEY, BOSS.

THERE'S ONE LEFT.

- OH, YEAH?

I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERES, YOU LITTLE RUNT.

Crack!

[glass shattering]

[barking]

- YAH!

AAAH!

Both: AAHH!

- [screaming]

[barking]

- [mumbling breathlessly]

YOU.

COME BACK HERE.

YOU GOT TO HELP ME CLEAN THIS PLACE UP.

YOU BROUGHT THIS ON YOURSELF, HAROLD.

I DID NOT, HAROLD.

YES, YOU DID, HAROLD.

HAROLD, I DID NOT.

[clams chirping]

[tires skidding]

[horn beeping]

- COME ON.

MOVE IT.

GET OUT OF THE ROAD.

- WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING?

- [meowing]

- GET HIM.

Both: AH!

[grunting]

- [yowls]

MEOW.

Smack!

[stretching sound]

smack!

- AH!

[tires skid]

- MROW.

- MROW.

- GEHWEE?

GEHWEE.

- WHAT THE?

[tires skid]

- OH.

- WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING IN MY CAR?

NO FREE RIDES, LOAFER.

- HOLD IT RIGHT THERE.

HANDS OFF MY GARY, YOU SNAIL NAPPER.

- SNAIL NAPPER?

I DON'T WANT YOUR DUMB OLD SNAIL.

- OH, YEAH, I SUPPOSE HE WONDERED OUT OF THE HOUSE

IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT JUST SO HE COULD JUMP INTO YOUR CAR.

- MEOW.

- NOT NOW, GARY. I'M SCOLDING.

AND I SUPPOSE... WELL, WHAT?

- MEOW, MEOW, MEOW, MEOW. MEOW.

- YOU DID WANDER OUT OF THE HOUSE ON YOUR OWN?

BUT WHY?

OH, I SEE WHY.

GOOD OLD FASHIONED AMORE.

[meowing]

- HEY.

THIS AIN'T OVER YET, RUNT.

[both growling]

- MONICA.

MONICA.

- [gasps] BRAD.

- OH, MONICA, I THOUGHT I MIGHT NEVER FIND YOU, MONICA.

I WAS JUST TAKING BILLY HERE FOR A WALK.

- MROW.

- MEOW.

[both growling]

both: HUH?

- I PROMISE TO NEVER AGAIN LEAVE YOUR SIDE.

LET'S GO GET A STEAMING HOT CUP OF JOE.

- OH, BRAD.

- OH, MONICA.

- THAT'S GOT TO HURT, BUDDY.

- MEOW-OW.

- YEAH, COME ON, RUNT.

I'LL SHOW YOU THIS GREAT DUMPSTER

WHERE WE CAN GET SOME SEAWEED NOODLE STEW.

- MEOW?

- DON'T STAY OUT TOO LATE, GARY.

[sighs]

THEY GROW UP SO FAST.

[lilting ukulele music]

♪ ♪