Original subtitles

Are you ready, kids?

KIDS: Aye, aye, Captain.

I can't hear you.

Aye, aye, Captain!

♪ Ooh!

♪ Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? ♪

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants! ♪

♪ Absorbent and yellow and porous is he ♪

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants! ♪

♪ If nautical nonsense be something you wish ♪

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants! ♪

♪ Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish ♪

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants! ♪ Ready?

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants!

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants!

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants!

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants!

[hearty laughter]

[flute playing]

Today we study the gentle rhythm of the sea.

[music blasting]

Gentle rhythm!

Oh, never mind.

[meows ]

Uh-huh! Uh-huh!

[making funny noises]

Ocean wave.

Tropical waves.

Whirlpool!

Reverse whirlpool!

[playing clarinet]

Grr!

SpongeBob, turn that noise off!

This will get his attention.

[blows loud single note]

[SpongeBob screaming]

Oh!

Oh...

Sponge... [note plays]

[choking]

Oh, Squidward, you swallowed your clarinet again.

I'll get it.

No! No! Don't... [notes playing]

touch... [note plays] me!

I'll get a better look.

Mm. It's too dark.

This calls for extreme measures.

Got it!

Hey, the pointy bit on the end is missing.

It's called a reed... eee!

What's a reed... eee?

Great. [high note]

My reed... [note] is still... [note]

stuck in my... [note] throat. [note]

And it's all your fault!

There's only one thing to do.

We got to see Sandy.[ various notes playing]

Hmm. Just as I thought.

You've got that pointy bit from the end of your clarinet

stuck in your throat.

That was clumsy of you.

I didn't.

It was SpongeBob that... [note]

Well, there's nothing to do for it but surgery.

Ooh...

Now is my chance to try out my new invention...

The solution to your problem.

A submarine? [note plays]

That's right, Squidward. Let me show you.

This whole lab is called the Chamber of Shrinkage.

I'll shrink the sub and myself down to microscopic size...

...then navigate through your brain,

down into your throat, and extract the reed

from inside. Simple!

Why don't you just shrink the reed?

[laughing]: Oh, Squidward,

always wanting to do it the hard way.

We're all set, Squidward.

Are you ready for the sedative?

Are you sure this is safe?

Completely!

As long as someone competent is behind the wheel.

Hey, what's that?

Hi-yah!

[birds chirping]

Sweet dreams, pardner.

Oops! I forgot to pack food for the trip.

I've got to get some supplies from my treedome,

and I need you to guard the submarine

while I'm gone.

Do you think you can handle it, SpongeBob?

Can do, Sandy.

Hut-hut-hut, hut-hut-hut!

Hut-hut-hut, hut-hut-hut!

Hi, SpongeBob.

Hello, citizen.

What are you doing?

Guarding Sandy's submarine.

Wow! I've never been in a submarine.

Let's look inside.

Can't. I'm guarding it.

Oh, man! Could you guard it from the inside?

You're right.

Patrick, you're a genius.

Ooh! Ooh!

SpongeBob and Patrick reporting for guard duty.

[both laughing]

[laughing][imitates engine]

[imitates brakes screeching]

[imitates engine]

Hmm.

"Shrink."

I do have a lot of issues.

[alarm blaring]

Pretty. Pretty.

I'm back, SpongeBob. Uh-oh.

[laughs]: You're so tiny.

[screams]: A giant SpongeBob!

Patrick! SpongeBob!

[screams]

Sandy's grown to gigantic size!

I don't think Sandy grew, Patrick.

I think weshrunk.

That's silly.

Don't you think it's more likely

that the entire world grew?

Hi, Squidward.

Well, the submarine is safely inside you.

Wonderful. Wait!

If you're out here, then who's in here?

Well, why don't you take a look for yourself?

[Squidward yells]

SpongeBob and Patrick are piloting

a miniature submarine inside my head.

SpongeBob and Patrick...

SpongeBob and...

[nervous giggling]

[screams]

[breathing heavily]

[screams]

You better calm down, Squidward.

With them little critters inside you,

I wouldn't be moving around too much.

You can knock them into something important.

Where are we, Patrick?

I don't know, but it's a real dump.

SANDY: SpongeBob, Patrick, can you hear me?

It's Sandy.

She's in there?

I'll save you, Sandy!

Stop it, you itty-bitty idiot!

[engine sputters and dies]

Sandy, where are you?

Where are we?

You're trespassing, SpongeBob...

In my lab, my submarine...

And you're trespassing inside of Squidward.

I thought this place was in bad shape.

SQUIDWARD: I heard that!

SANDY: Let's get you out of there, SpongeBob.

All you need to do is locate the autopilot.

It'll safely take you through your mission,

and then out the extraction point.

Um...

We broke it.

Stop it! What are you trying to do?

Kill him?

This is approximately 17 times harder to drive

than a boatmobile,

which you're never successfully done.

So just take it nice and easy.

No problemo.

Nice and... easy!

[both screaming]

[Patrick screams]

So, how's it going?

[tires screeching, metal crashing]

[hissing]

[screaming]

[sputtering]

I can't control my eyeballs!

Don't worry. It's temporary.

Now, just sign this.

Okay. Now, what is this?

Oh, just your autograph,

uh, for when you're, uh... famous.

Oh, of course.

I've got headshots, you know.

[yells] What the...?

Squidward!

What's happening?

Give me that! Give it back! No, give it. Give it back.

[both yelling]

They're hitting your central nervous system!

[bell dinging]

Oh. You think?

You're not in control of your actions.

Hey!

Oh, I'm sorry.

I'm not in control of my actions.

[screaming]

They've gone off course!

[yelling]

Oh, my gosh! You're out of control!

[screaming]

SPONGEBOB: Ew! Where are we?

[rumbling]

SPONGEBOB: Mayday! Mayday![Patrick screaming]

We're sinking! And Patrick won't stop screaming!

Those stomach acid levels are way too high!

The reserve tanks are almost empty.

[Patrick grunts]

Patrick!

Finished.

SANDY: SpongeBob, you got to get out of there!

It's a straight shot up the stomach to the esophagus

where the reed is.

[note plays]

You can complete your mission

if we could just access an alternative fuel.

Like natural gas.

Natural gas?

Like this.

[burps]

[rumbling]

Stop burping inside me!

That's disgusting!

Wait a minute, Squidward.

They might be on to something.

What? If you could make a big enough burp...

We could filter the C02 through our ballast tanks,

refire the engines,

and ride the shock wave out of here!

Wow.

He's right. What?

We're going through with your plan, Patrick.

Yay! What plan?

Now burp, Squidward.

Lives are on the line.

[hissing]

I never thought it would end this way.

[loud burp]

It's working.

Whee! Whee!

SANDY: They're heading for the esophagus.

Phew! What have you been eating?

Morons.

SpongeBob to Sandy.

We're reached the foreign obstruction.

Okay. You're going to have to go out and dislodge it somehow.

I'm already on it.

This stupid hammer won't break anything.

SpongeBob, do what you were born to do! Dance!

You're right, Patrick.

Whirlpool spin!

[choking]

SANDY: Good work, guys.

Mission accomplished.

Now all you have to do is...

Get out of my body!

Go!

Grow?

[all screaming][alarm blaring]

KRABS: Almost ready to open.

There!

Good morning, Mr. Krabs.

Hello, Squidward.

Neptune's trousers!

What's gotten into you?

SPONGEBOB: Reporting for duty, Mr. Krabs.

[toilet flushing]

PATRICK: Squidward, the toilet's backed up again.

[laughing]

Hey!

Hey, you there! Who me?

Yes, you.

Get outta town!

[crying]

[screaming]

Get outta town!

And take a vacation

to beautiful Sunny Seashores Resort.

Here you go, sir.

[screaming]

I got to get out of town!

Oh, thanks, SpongeBob.

Sure, Patrick...

[screaming]: I got to get going!

He told me to. Who did?

Uh... well...

Uh... hmm...

I'm not sure, but he had a briefcase.

[screaming]: Oh, a briefcase!

He might be a paid assassin.

[both screaming]

But, Patrick, you can't go... not like this.

Who will go with me to the next Jellyfisherman's Expo?

It will have to be one of your other chums.

'Cause my mind is set.

[both sobbing]

Unset it, please unset it.

[loud sobbing]

I guess I'll pack up my stuff and get ready to go.

My... clothes.

Um, Patrick, those are my clothes.

My peanut butter.

That's my peanut butter.

And my pickles.

I can't believe you're leaving, Patrick...

with all my pickles!

It's the end of me...

being here.

Wait!

Stop.

What about all our plans?

"8:00 a.m., wake up Patrick.

"9:00 a.m., eat Kelpo with Patrick.

"10:00 a.m., brush teeth with Patrick.

1:00 p.m., stare at Patrick."

Who's going to do all that with me?

I'm sorry, there's no stopping the unstoppable.

Patrick Star will live no more, forever...

in Bikini Bottom.

But what if you weren't Patrick Star?

Oh, no! I'm not Patrick Star?

You are Patrick Star, but you won't be for long.

Huh?

There you go, Patrick.

No one will know it's you. [screaming]

[gasps]: Patrick, you okay?

Hey, guys.

Yo, Patrick, cool shades.

Well, Pat, that disguise didn't work.

We're going to have to try harder.

Yeah, well, thanks, old SpongeBob, for your help.

It was a noble effort,

but alas, all in vain.

It's no use. I must leave.

Oh...

Good-bye, rock.

Good-bye, coral... Ow!

Good-bye, seaweed.

Too bad we couldn't come up with a better costume.

Hmm...

Good-bye, sky.

That's it!

With that seaweed on your head, you could be...

I know! I know!

I could be Mr. Seaweed Monster Man.

And live happily forever after in Bikini Bottom.

Patrick, there already is a Mr. Seaweed Monster Man.

Hey.

Darn.

It's okay, Patrick.

So you can't be a monster.

But that vegetation on your head

give me an idea of what you can be.

You're all set.

Come on out, Patrick.

Hi, SpongeBob.

And hello, lady!

The disguise is working, Patrick.

I mean... Patricia.

[both giggling]

SpongeBob,

you never told me you had a girlfriend.

Oh, I'm not his girlfriend.

I'm Pat. ...tricia.

Patricia, Patricia.

[nervous laugh]

Bro, your girlfriend is not ugly.

Actually, Larry, she's not my girlfriend.

She's just a...

It's cool, buddy.

You don't have to explain your girlfriend to me.

But she's not my girlfriend.

I don't know why you're standing here talking to me

when you could be talking to your girlfriend.

Come on, Patricia.

Bye.

Congratulations on the new girlfriend, dude.

SpongeBob, this is not the time for a Sunday stroll.

It's time for work.

But, Mr. Krabs, the Krusty Krab doesn't open

for another two hours.

There'll be no such thing

as opening too early, me boy.

Excuse us, Miss.

Huh?

SpongeBob, who's your friend?

Mr. Krabs, this is Patricia.

Patricia.

The most beautiful sound I've ever seen.

SpongeBob, do we need any more help down at The Krusty Krab?

No.We do? Great. She can start right away.

[door opening]

Huh...

And who are you, my Rubenesque beauty?

That's Patricia...

Our newest Krusty Krab employee.

Well, she sure is stunning.

Just keep your eyes

on the customers, Mr. Squidward.

Hi, Patricia.

I drew this for you.

The likeness is uncanny if I do say so myself.

[distant screaming]

Uh, thank you, Squidward.

[door opening]

Order up, Miss Patricia.

Excuse me, Squidward.

[belches]

This order goes to table seven.

And remember your manners.

Four... nee... foo-nee...

KRABS: That's a seven, Patricia.

Mr. Krabs, you ordered two Krusty Meals?

[gasps]: Did I order two meals?

Oh, silly me.

I can't possibly eat two Krusty Meals myself.

I guess you'll just have to help me

finish all this food.

Okay.

[romantic music playing]

Patricia, we may have only

known each other for a short time now,

but I feel like a special connection has been made.

[noisy chewing]

[music slows]

[loud belch]

Quite an appetite, but she's all woman.

[clarinet playing]

Eh?

You know, Patricia, they don't call me

the sizzle-lipped squid for nothing.

So are you free this Saturday night?

No. That's the night SpongeBob and I

are having a staring contest.

SpongeBob?!

Get back to work, you goldbricking freeloader!

Hut two, hut, two, ya, ya!

And don't come back until all those patties are Krabby.

Well, now that we're alone,

how would you like to be my date Friday night to a...

I can't.

SpongeBob and I will be flying submarines that night.

I have to get back to Krusting the Krab.

Man, why are those two so nice to me?

They were never this nice to Patrick.

It's weird.

Are you sure about Saturday night?

[loud crash]

Persistent bunch.

How about Sunday brunch?

No thanks... again.

But I made reservations for two at...

I said no.

No.

No way.

No.

No.

No!

What is itabout me

that makes those two so friendly?

Must have something to do with this disguise.

I can't wear this any longer.

If you reveal your secret identity,

you'll have to leave Bikini Bottom.

I'm sorry, SpongeBob.

I just can't live like this anymore.

I'm tired of pretending to be someone I'm not.

[all talking at once]

The lovely Patricia... [smooches]

has returned to us.

I have an announcement to make.

The entire day that I've worked here,

I've wanted to say...

[door opens, gasps]

[silly muttering]

I've wanted to say that, uh...

that...

that I will eat any leftovers you leave on your plate.

ALL: Huh?

Ahoy!

Waitress!

Aren't you gonna take myorder?

I'll be right there, sir.

What's the matter, Patrick?

Th-that's the guy with the briefcase.

The guy who's trying to run me out of town.

[gasps]

The assassin!

What can I get you, sir?

Say,

don't I know you from somewhere?

No.

Hmm.

[gasps]: That's it!

Get outta town!

He's on to us.

I won't let you do it.

You'll have to do something horrible to me

before I'll let you throw Patrick out of town!

Patrick?! Patrick?!

You forgot your flyer.

SPONGEBOB: "Get outta town!

To beautiful Sunny Shore Resorts."

Look, this guy wasn't trying to run you out of town.

He just wanted to sell you a luxury vacation

at a modest price.

Well, I guess I don't need this disguise anymore.

[all gasping]

Um...

I think I need to take a shower.

So, let me get this straight.

Uh, you're not a woman?

No.

Well, then you're fired.

Uh, if anybody needs me, I'll be in my office

for, I don't know, the next 20 years or so.

Hey, buddy, what do you say we go home

and get started on this list?

[both cheering]