All language subtitles for SpongeBob SquarePants 1999 S01 E04

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:09,143 --> 00:00:10,411 ARE YOU READY, KIDS? 2 00:00:10,444 --> 00:00:12,446 Kids: AYE, AYE, CAPTAIN! 3 00:00:12,480 --> 00:00:13,814 I CAN'T HEAR YOU. 4 00:00:13,847 --> 00:00:15,516 ( louder ): AYE, AYE, CAPTAIN! 5 00:00:15,549 --> 00:00:18,719 * OH... 6 00:00:18,752 --> 00:00:20,788 * WHO LIVES IN A PINEAPPLE UNDER THE SEA? * 7 00:00:20,821 --> 00:00:22,790 * SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! * 8 00:00:22,823 --> 00:00:25,293 * ABSORBENT AND YELLOW AND POROUS IS HE. * 9 00:00:25,326 --> 00:00:26,694 * SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! * 10 00:00:26,727 --> 00:00:29,097 * IF NAUTICAL NONSENSE BE SOMETHING YOU WISH... * 11 00:00:29,130 --> 00:00:30,364 * SPONGEBOB SQUARE PANTS! * 12 00:00:30,398 --> 00:00:33,134 * THEN DROP ON THE DECK AND FLOP LIKE A FISH. * 13 00:00:33,167 --> 00:00:34,768 * SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! * 14 00:00:34,802 --> 00:00:36,704 * READY? SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! * 15 00:00:36,737 --> 00:00:39,707 * SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! 16 00:00:39,740 --> 00:00:40,741 * SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! 17 00:00:40,774 --> 00:00:43,377 * SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! 18 00:00:43,411 --> 00:00:45,713 ( laughs heartily ) 19 00:00:45,746 --> 00:00:49,217 [Captioning sponsored by THE U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION ( plays airy tune ) 20 00:00:49,250 --> 00:00:50,718 and NICKELODEON] 21 00:01:03,164 --> 00:01:04,598 Squidward: WOW! 22 00:01:04,632 --> 00:01:09,503 SQUIDWARD, THIS IS THE BEST SOUFFLE YOU HAVE EVER CREATED! 23 00:01:09,537 --> 00:01:10,604 ( smacks loudly ) 24 00:01:10,638 --> 00:01:13,807 OH! CONGRATULATIONS, CHEF. 25 00:01:15,709 --> 00:01:17,278 ( water running ) 26 00:01:17,311 --> 00:01:18,346 ( faucet squeaks ) 27 00:01:18,379 --> 00:01:19,347 ( brushing ) 28 00:01:19,380 --> 00:01:20,548 ( gargling, then spits ) 29 00:01:22,183 --> 00:01:23,651 ( someone giggles ) 30 00:01:23,684 --> 00:01:24,818 ( chair squeaks ) 31 00:01:26,587 --> 00:01:33,394 ( two voices giggling ) 32 00:01:38,599 --> 00:01:39,400 ( whispering ) 33 00:01:43,437 --> 00:01:45,239 SpongeBob's bubble: HI, PATRICK. 34 00:01:45,273 --> 00:01:46,407 ( laughs ) 35 00:01:47,541 --> 00:01:48,576 ( inhales deeply ) 36 00:01:52,613 --> 00:01:53,814 ( whispering huskily ) 37 00:01:56,417 --> 00:01:57,451 ( pops ) 38 00:01:57,485 --> 00:01:58,586 Patrick: HI, SPONGEBOB. 39 00:01:58,619 --> 00:01:59,587 ( laughs ) 40 00:01:59,620 --> 00:02:01,889 ( grumbles ) 41 00:02:10,798 --> 00:02:13,734 ( SpongeBob laughing ) 42 00:02:15,636 --> 00:02:19,573 PATRICK, YOU'RE MY BEST FRIEND IN THE WHOLE NEIGHBORHOOD. 43 00:02:22,676 --> 00:02:25,379 ( mumbling gibberish ) 44 00:02:33,554 --> 00:02:36,657 Squidward: PATRICK, YOU ARE THE DUMBEST IDIOT 45 00:02:36,690 --> 00:02:39,793 IT HAS EVER BEEN MY MISFORTUNE TO KNOW. 46 00:02:41,229 --> 00:02:42,530 ( mumbling gibberish ) 47 00:02:44,832 --> 00:02:47,668 Patrick: DO YOU REALLY THINK THAT, SPONGEBOB? 48 00:02:47,701 --> 00:02:49,637 OF COURSE, PATRICK. 49 00:02:49,670 --> 00:02:51,939 ANYONE WITH EYES COULD SEE THAT. 50 00:02:53,541 --> 00:02:54,542 ( bubble pops ) 51 00:02:56,577 --> 00:02:59,347 Patrick: YEAH, WELL, I THINK YOU'RE UGLY! 52 00:02:59,380 --> 00:03:01,515 YELLOW IS UGLY! 53 00:03:01,549 --> 00:03:04,952 ( blows a raspberry ) 54 00:03:04,985 --> 00:03:07,321 PATRICK, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 55 00:03:09,657 --> 00:03:10,958 Squidward: SPONGEBOB 56 00:03:10,991 --> 00:03:12,993 I NO LONGER WISH TO KNOW YOU... 57 00:03:13,026 --> 00:03:14,495 ( gasping ) 58 00:03:14,528 --> 00:03:17,565 YOU GIVE BOTTOM DWELLERS A BAD NAME. 59 00:03:17,598 --> 00:03:22,603 ( Squidward mumbling ) 60 00:03:24,405 --> 00:03:25,839 Squidward: IF I HAD A DOLLAR 61 00:03:25,873 --> 00:03:27,741 FOR EVERY BRAIN YOU DON'T HAVE 62 00:03:27,775 --> 00:03:30,010 I'D HAVE ONE DOLLAR. 63 00:03:30,043 --> 00:03:32,380 ( laughing to himself ) 64 00:03:33,847 --> 00:03:35,349 Squidward: HEY, PATRICK 65 00:03:35,383 --> 00:03:36,950 I HEARD THERE WAS A JOB OPENING 66 00:03:36,984 --> 00:03:38,519 DOWN AT THE PET SHOP... 67 00:03:38,552 --> 00:03:39,387 AS SOME NEWSPAPER! 68 00:03:39,420 --> 00:03:42,390 THAT MAKES YOU A BIG DUMMY, YOU DUMMY! 69 00:03:42,423 --> 00:03:45,493 YEAH, WELL, THAT MEANS THAT, UH... SO ARE YOU! 70 00:03:45,526 --> 00:03:47,395 RIGHT, YOU'RE A TURKEY! 71 00:03:47,428 --> 00:03:48,829 SpongeBob: WHAT'S THAT? 72 00:03:48,862 --> 00:03:50,564 Patrick: IT'S WHAT YOU ARE! 73 00:03:50,598 --> 00:03:52,466 WELL, YOU'RE A BIGGER ONE. 74 00:03:52,500 --> 00:03:54,468 WELL, YOU'RE STILL YELLOW. 75 00:03:54,502 --> 00:03:56,437 YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE IS YELLOW? 76 00:03:56,470 --> 00:03:57,471 WHAT?! 77 00:03:57,505 --> 00:03:58,839 YOU ARE! 78 00:03:58,872 --> 00:04:01,342 WELL, IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU CALL ME 79 00:04:01,375 --> 00:04:03,844 BECAUSE I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN ANYWAY! 80 00:04:03,877 --> 00:04:05,713 ( chomping loudly ) 81 00:04:05,746 --> 00:04:06,680 ( door squeaks open ) 82 00:04:06,714 --> 00:04:08,316 AW, TARTAR SAUCE! 83 00:04:08,349 --> 00:04:08,949 ( slams ) 84 00:04:10,551 --> 00:04:11,585 ( grunts ) 85 00:04:13,921 --> 00:04:14,888 ( crash ) 86 00:04:16,957 --> 00:04:25,766 ( laughing evilly ) 87 00:04:25,799 --> 00:04:29,870 ( gagging and gulping ) 88 00:04:29,903 --> 00:04:34,942 ( fork sproinging ) 89 00:04:34,975 --> 00:04:36,710 ( whistle sliding upward ) 90 00:04:36,744 --> 00:04:38,446 ( bell rings ) 91 00:04:40,514 --> 00:04:42,916 WHOA, SQUIDWARD, YOU'RE CHOKING! 92 00:04:43,984 --> 00:04:46,086 OH... I KNOW WHAT TO DO 93 00:04:46,119 --> 00:04:49,490 BUT I SHOULD WASH MY HANDS FIRST. 94 00:04:49,523 --> 00:04:50,424 OH, WELL. 95 00:04:52,593 --> 00:04:54,895 ( inhaling deeply ) 96 00:04:54,928 --> 00:04:57,431 ( exhaling ) 97 00:04:57,465 --> 00:05:03,571 ( suckers popping ) 98 00:05:03,604 --> 00:05:08,709 ( sputtering ) 99 00:05:10,611 --> 00:05:11,712 ( spits ) 100 00:05:11,745 --> 00:05:12,813 I WIN! 101 00:05:14,014 --> 00:05:16,049 WOW! PATRICK! 102 00:05:16,083 --> 00:05:17,985 YOU SAVED ME. 103 00:05:18,018 --> 00:05:18,986 I DID? 104 00:05:19,019 --> 00:05:20,087 YEP. 105 00:05:20,120 --> 00:05:22,723 YOU'RE A REAL LIFESAVER, FRIEND. 106 00:05:22,756 --> 00:05:23,757 FRIEND? 107 00:05:24,958 --> 00:05:27,561 FRIEND! 108 00:05:27,595 --> 00:05:29,463 EE... YEAH, PATRICK 109 00:05:29,497 --> 00:05:31,098 WE'RE FRIENDS. 110 00:05:31,131 --> 00:05:33,601 JUST FRIENDS. 111 00:05:34,702 --> 00:05:37,037 SO, WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO TONIGHT 112 00:05:37,070 --> 00:05:38,105 BEST FRIEND? 113 00:05:38,138 --> 00:05:40,708 WELL, I WAS GOING TO PRACTICE 114 00:05:40,741 --> 00:05:42,510 MY CLARINET SOLO. 115 00:05:42,543 --> 00:05:43,777 CLARINET? 116 00:05:43,811 --> 00:05:45,979 I LOVE MUSIC! 117 00:05:46,013 --> 00:05:47,815 AW, WHO NEEDS THEM? 118 00:05:47,848 --> 00:05:50,684 THEY'RE NO FUN ANYWAY, RIGHT, GARY? 119 00:05:50,718 --> 00:05:51,885 GARY? 120 00:05:51,919 --> 00:05:53,220 ( hollow knocks ) 121 00:05:53,253 --> 00:05:56,857 Squidward: SQUIDWARD WILL BE PERFORMING HIS VERSION 122 00:05:56,890 --> 00:05:59,627 OF "SOLITUDE IN 'E' MINOR." 123 00:05:59,660 --> 00:06:00,961 YEAH! 124 00:06:00,994 --> 00:06:02,730 "E" MINOR, ALL RIGHT, YEAH! 125 00:06:02,763 --> 00:06:03,897 ( inhaling ) 126 00:06:03,931 --> 00:06:04,898 ( begins playing ) 127 00:06:04,932 --> 00:06:10,871 ( snoring ) 128 00:06:10,904 --> 00:06:13,407 AW, WHAT AM I WORRIED ABOUT? 129 00:06:13,441 --> 00:06:15,409 I GOT PLENTY OF FRIENDS. 130 00:06:15,443 --> 00:06:17,711 I CAN NAME THREE RIGHT OFF THE BAT. 131 00:06:17,745 --> 00:06:19,079 UH... 132 00:06:24,818 --> 00:06:27,421 THE GANG'S ALL HERE. 133 00:06:29,657 --> 00:06:31,024 OH! 134 00:06:33,794 --> 00:06:36,530 ( grunting and grumbling ) 135 00:06:36,564 --> 00:06:37,665 ( something snaps ) 136 00:06:37,698 --> 00:06:40,801 OH, OH, MY BACK! 137 00:06:40,834 --> 00:06:43,571 I THREW OUT MY BACK. 138 00:06:43,604 --> 00:06:44,672 OH, BOY! 139 00:06:44,705 --> 00:06:46,540 NOW'S MY CHANCE. 140 00:06:46,574 --> 00:06:48,642 SPONGEBOB? NO, NO, STAY BACK! 141 00:06:48,676 --> 00:06:50,911 DON'T WORRY, SQUIDWARD, I'M COMING! 142 00:06:50,944 --> 00:06:52,846 NO, NO, NO, GET AWAY FROM ME! 143 00:06:52,880 --> 00:06:55,015 HANG ON, I'LL SAVE YOU! 144 00:06:55,048 --> 00:06:56,850 Squidward: NO, GET AWAY FROM ME! 145 00:06:56,884 --> 00:06:58,852 HOLD ON! 146 00:06:59,853 --> 00:07:01,188 NO! NO! GET AWAY! 147 00:07:01,221 --> 00:07:02,490 ( yelling ) 148 00:07:02,523 --> 00:07:03,824 ( crack ) 149 00:07:03,857 --> 00:07:04,858 OW, I'M RUINED! 150 00:07:04,892 --> 00:07:06,727 I... I... I... 151 00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:09,797 I FEEL GREAT. 152 00:07:09,830 --> 00:07:12,032 THANKS, SPONGEBOB. 153 00:07:12,065 --> 00:07:14,902 YOU'RE A REAL FRIEND. 154 00:07:14,935 --> 00:07:16,504 ( trancelike ): FRIEND... 155 00:07:16,537 --> 00:07:18,506 NO, NO, NO! I DIDN'T MEAN THAT. 156 00:07:18,539 --> 00:07:20,107 DON'T WORRY, SQUIDDY OLD PAL. 157 00:07:20,140 --> 00:07:21,975 THAT'S WHAT FRIENDS ARE FOR. 158 00:07:23,844 --> 00:07:26,680 SpongeBob: SO DUMB PATRICK FELL ASLEEP ON YOU, HUH? 159 00:07:26,714 --> 00:07:27,848 SOME FRIEND! 160 00:07:27,881 --> 00:07:29,617 A REAL FRIEND WOULD PERFORM FOR YOU. 161 00:07:29,650 --> 00:07:30,751 YOU PLAY? 162 00:07:30,784 --> 00:07:32,019 ARE YOU KIDDING? 163 00:07:32,052 --> 00:07:34,221 I'VE BEEN PLAYING BASSINET FOR YEARS. 164 00:07:34,254 --> 00:07:36,590 GIVE ME AN "A," BUDDY. 165 00:07:36,624 --> 00:07:37,891 ( plays a note ) 166 00:07:37,925 --> 00:07:44,131 * SQUIDWARD IS MY BEST FRIEND IN THE WORLD... * 167 00:07:44,164 --> 00:07:46,066 ( strings grating raucously ) 168 00:07:46,099 --> 00:07:50,037 * SQUIDWARD IS MY BEST FRIEND IN THE SEA. * 169 00:07:50,070 --> 00:07:51,805 ( Squidward yells ) 170 00:07:51,839 --> 00:07:53,607 ( grumbles ) 171 00:07:53,641 --> 00:07:54,975 * SQUIDWARD... 172 00:07:55,008 --> 00:07:58,646 * LIKES PATRICK MORE THAN SPONGEBOB. * 173 00:07:58,679 --> 00:08:03,884 * PATRICK IS A DIRTY, STINKY, ROTTEN FRIEND, SQUIDWARD! * 174 00:08:05,218 --> 00:08:08,088 UM, I CAN FIX THIS. 175 00:08:08,121 --> 00:08:10,524 ( growling and grumbling ) 176 00:08:10,558 --> 00:08:11,525 ( shout, thud ) 177 00:08:12,826 --> 00:08:16,163 SO, UH, I'LL SEE YOU TOMORROW, SQUIDWARD. 178 00:08:16,196 --> 00:08:17,731 CALL ME. 179 00:08:17,765 --> 00:08:20,267 Squidward: UGH! THAT WAS DISGUSTING! 180 00:08:20,300 --> 00:08:22,069 FEEL LIKE I NEED TO SCRUB MYSELF. 181 00:08:22,102 --> 00:08:24,905 ( screaming ) 182 00:08:24,938 --> 00:08:28,075 HEY, BUDDY, I WARMED IT UP FOR YOU. 183 00:08:28,108 --> 00:08:29,710 PATRICK, GET OUT! 184 00:08:29,743 --> 00:08:31,011 AND PUT SOME CLOTHES ON. 185 00:08:31,044 --> 00:08:32,813 WHAT'S THE MATTER, SQUIDWARD? 186 00:08:32,846 --> 00:08:33,881 ( gasps ) 187 00:08:33,914 --> 00:08:35,015 OH, HO! 188 00:08:35,048 --> 00:08:36,984 SO THIS IS WHAT I FIND, HUH?! 189 00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:40,153 MY BEST FRIEND AND MY EX-BEST FRIEND 190 00:08:40,187 --> 00:08:43,090 AND RUBBER BATH TOYS! 191 00:08:43,123 --> 00:08:45,125 ( both arguing at once ) 192 00:08:45,158 --> 00:08:46,627 ( yells ) 193 00:08:46,660 --> 00:08:49,296 THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING TO ME! 194 00:08:49,329 --> 00:08:50,798 ( door opens and closes ) 195 00:08:50,831 --> 00:08:53,166 SpongeBob and Patrick: SQUIDWARD! 196 00:08:53,200 --> 00:08:54,602 SpongeBob: BUDDY! 197 00:08:54,635 --> 00:08:56,804 Patrick: SQUIDWARD, WHERE ARE YOU? 198 00:08:56,837 --> 00:08:58,939 Squidward: OH, THIS IS NUTS! 199 00:08:58,972 --> 00:09:02,142 I NEED A PLAN TO GET THOSE TWO BACK TOGETHER 200 00:09:02,175 --> 00:09:03,777 AND OUT OF MY HAIR. 201 00:09:07,748 --> 00:09:08,816 ( doorbell rings ) 202 00:09:11,284 --> 00:09:13,086 ( sniffs ) 203 00:09:13,120 --> 00:09:15,322 ( fondly ): SQUIDWARD! 204 00:09:16,757 --> 00:09:18,191 A DINNER PARTY? 205 00:09:18,225 --> 00:09:19,359 I'D LOVE TO! 206 00:09:19,392 --> 00:09:20,694 ( knocking at door ) 207 00:09:22,162 --> 00:09:23,797 DID YOU MISS ME? 208 00:09:23,831 --> 00:09:25,365 COME ON IN. 209 00:09:25,398 --> 00:09:27,735 YOU LOOK STUNNING. 210 00:09:27,768 --> 00:09:29,637 I'D MUCH RATHER DINE WITH YOU 211 00:09:29,670 --> 00:09:30,871 THAN THAT LOUSY... 212 00:09:30,904 --> 00:09:32,205 SAY, WHAT GIVES?! 213 00:09:32,239 --> 00:09:34,775 I'M NOT SITTING NEAR THAT MANIAC! 214 00:09:34,808 --> 00:09:35,909 ME, NEITHER! 215 00:09:35,943 --> 00:09:37,845 THIS WAS A SETUP. 216 00:09:37,878 --> 00:09:41,381 I THOUGHT YOU TWO WERE MY BEST FRIENDS. 217 00:09:41,414 --> 00:09:45,152 I AM YOUR BEST FRIEND. I AM YOUR BEST FRIEND. 218 00:09:45,185 --> 00:09:48,355 WELL, HOW ABOUT SOME SODA, GUYS? 219 00:09:48,388 --> 00:09:50,357 YES, PLEASE. 220 00:09:50,390 --> 00:09:51,925 THANKS, FRIEND. 221 00:09:51,959 --> 00:09:55,696 HOW ABOUT SOME FOR YOUR BEST FRIEND? 222 00:09:55,729 --> 00:09:56,764 SpongeBob: THANKS... 223 00:09:56,797 --> 00:09:58,065 BEST FRIEND. 224 00:09:58,098 --> 00:09:59,232 ( gulping ) 225 00:09:59,266 --> 00:10:01,334 CAN I HAVE SOME NOW, BUDDY? 226 00:10:01,368 --> 00:10:03,136 WAIT! I NEED SOME MORE. 227 00:10:03,170 --> 00:10:05,405 I STILL DIDN'T GET ANY. 228 00:10:05,438 --> 00:10:06,406 THERE YOU GO. 229 00:10:06,439 --> 00:10:08,008 MORE, PLEASE. 230 00:10:08,041 --> 00:10:09,309 ( gulping ) 231 00:10:09,342 --> 00:10:10,043 SQUIDWARD! 232 00:10:10,077 --> 00:10:10,811 SQUIDWARD! 233 00:10:10,844 --> 00:10:11,779 SQUIDWARD! 234 00:10:11,812 --> 00:10:12,846 SQUIDWARD! 235 00:10:12,880 --> 00:10:13,947 HEY, SQUIDWARD! 236 00:10:13,981 --> 00:10:15,082 SQUIDWARD! 237 00:10:15,115 --> 00:10:15,983 SQUIDWARD! 238 00:10:16,016 --> 00:10:17,250 HEY, SQUIDWARD! 239 00:10:17,284 --> 00:10:19,319 Squidward: PATRICK, YOUR GLASS IS FULL. 240 00:10:19,352 --> 00:10:20,320 OH, YEAH. 241 00:10:20,353 --> 00:10:21,755 SQUIDWARD! HEY, SQUIDWARD! 242 00:10:21,789 --> 00:10:22,823 SQUIDWARD! 243 00:10:22,856 --> 00:10:23,891 SQUIDWARD! 244 00:10:23,924 --> 00:10:24,825 HEY, SQUIDWARD! 245 00:10:24,858 --> 00:10:25,325 SQUIDWARD! 246 00:10:25,358 --> 00:10:25,926 SQUIDWARD! 247 00:10:25,959 --> 00:10:26,860 SQUIDWARD! 248 00:10:26,894 --> 00:10:27,695 HEY, SQUIDWARD! 249 00:10:27,728 --> 00:10:28,796 SQUIDWARD! SQUIDWARD! 250 00:10:28,829 --> 00:10:31,198 SORRY, BOYS, I'M ALL OUT OF POP. 251 00:10:31,231 --> 00:10:33,300 I'M GOING TO GO GET SOME MORE. 252 00:10:33,333 --> 00:10:36,436 WHY DON'T YOU JUST STAY HERE AND CHAT? 253 00:10:36,469 --> 00:10:38,638 ( whistling casually ) 254 00:10:48,849 --> 00:10:50,050 ( hiccups ) 255 00:10:50,083 --> 00:10:51,051 ( belches loudly ) 256 00:10:51,084 --> 00:10:53,954 ( laughing ) 257 00:10:53,987 --> 00:10:57,257 ( laughing ) 258 00:10:57,290 --> 00:11:00,460 ( both laughing uproariously ) 259 00:11:00,493 --> 00:11:01,895 ( creaking ) 260 00:11:01,929 --> 00:11:03,296 ( laughter continuing ) 261 00:11:09,837 --> 00:11:10,804 ( deep groan ) 262 00:11:10,838 --> 00:11:11,705 ( crash ) 263 00:11:13,073 --> 00:11:16,176 I SHOULD JUST WALK AWAY RIGHT NOW. 264 00:11:21,381 --> 00:11:23,050 WHAT A SURPRISE... 265 00:11:23,083 --> 00:11:26,053 I INVITED THEM IN AND I LEFT THEM ALONE. 266 00:11:26,086 --> 00:11:29,322 WELL, SQUIDWARD, WHAT HAVE WE LEARNED TODAY? 267 00:11:30,357 --> 00:11:31,959 GUESS WHAT, SQUIDWARD? 268 00:11:31,992 --> 00:11:35,095 ME AND SPONGEBOB ARE FRIENDS AGAIN. 269 00:11:35,128 --> 00:11:36,396 BE FRIENDS SOMEWHERE ELSE. 270 00:11:36,429 --> 00:11:38,298 DON'T YOU WANT US TO HELP CLEAN UP? 271 00:11:38,331 --> 00:11:40,200 NO! OUT! 272 00:11:40,233 --> 00:11:42,936 PSST! I THINK HE'S JEALOUS. 273 00:11:42,970 --> 00:11:44,772 HOW PATHETIC. 274 00:11:44,805 --> 00:11:45,705 ( slams ) 275 00:11:47,240 --> 00:11:48,341 ( pop ) 276 00:11:48,375 --> 00:11:49,409 ( crash ) 277 00:11:49,442 --> 00:11:50,778 ( Squidward groans ) 278 00:11:50,811 --> 00:11:52,112 OH, MY BACK! 279 00:12:04,792 --> 00:12:09,362 ( SpongeBob snoring ) 280 00:12:16,236 --> 00:12:18,839 ( foghorn blares ) 281 00:12:22,109 --> 00:12:23,310 THIS IS IT, GARY. 282 00:12:23,343 --> 00:12:24,511 ( meows ) 283 00:12:29,983 --> 00:12:32,185 THE BIG BOATING EXAM IS TODAY. 284 00:12:32,219 --> 00:12:34,287 I'VE NEVER FELT SO CAPABLE...! 285 00:12:36,489 --> 00:12:38,558 I'M READY, I'M READY, I'M READY. 286 00:12:38,591 --> 00:12:40,894 SQUIDWARD, SQUIDWARD... 287 00:12:40,928 --> 00:12:41,895 WHAT? 288 00:12:41,929 --> 00:12:43,063 I'M READY, SQUIDWARD. 289 00:12:43,096 --> 00:12:44,998 Squidward: READY TO MOVE? 290 00:12:45,032 --> 00:12:47,500 NO, I'M READY TO PASS MY BOATING TEST. 291 00:12:47,534 --> 00:12:50,037 I'M READY, I'M READY, I'M READY... 292 00:12:53,240 --> 00:12:55,308 I'M READY-EADY-EADY-EADY 293 00:12:55,342 --> 00:12:58,111 EADY-EADY-EADY-EADY, READY. 294 00:12:58,145 --> 00:13:01,081 WELL, PAL, I WON'T BE NEEDING YOU ANYMORE. 295 00:13:01,114 --> 00:13:04,551 I'M READY, I'M READY, I'M READY, OH, YEAH! 296 00:13:04,584 --> 00:13:05,385 I'M READY! 297 00:13:05,418 --> 00:13:07,888 ( examinee whooping it up ) 298 00:13:07,921 --> 00:13:09,089 YES! 299 00:13:09,122 --> 00:13:11,258 HEY, I JUST GOT MY LICENSE. 300 00:13:11,291 --> 00:13:13,560 HEY, I'M GETTING MINE NEXT. 301 00:13:13,593 --> 00:13:15,228 HEY, I DOUBT IT. 302 00:13:15,262 --> 00:13:16,263 OKAY. 303 00:13:16,296 --> 00:13:18,065 SEE YOU ON THE ROAD. 304 00:13:18,098 --> 00:13:19,132 I'M READY! 305 00:13:19,166 --> 00:13:21,168 HERE I COME, MRS. PUFF. 306 00:13:21,201 --> 00:13:26,106 I'M READY, I'M READY, I'M READY, I'M READY, I'M READY. 307 00:13:26,139 --> 00:13:27,174 ( sighs ) 308 00:13:27,207 --> 00:13:29,877 I'M NOT READY. 309 00:13:31,044 --> 00:13:32,479 HI, MRS. PUFF. 310 00:13:32,512 --> 00:13:35,148 TODAY IS THE DAY I PASS MY BOATING EXAM. 311 00:13:35,182 --> 00:13:37,450 WE'LL SEE ABOUT THAT, SPONGEBOB. 312 00:13:37,484 --> 00:13:38,551 FIRST WE MUST... 313 00:13:38,585 --> 00:13:40,253 FIRST I MUST PASS THE ORAL EXAM. 314 00:13:40,287 --> 00:13:42,589 I AM CONFIDENT I WILL SUCCESSFULLY SUCCEED. 315 00:13:42,622 --> 00:13:43,590 I KNOW. 316 00:13:43,623 --> 00:13:45,125 OKAY, NUMBER ONE. 317 00:13:45,158 --> 00:13:47,594 WHAT IS THE FRONT OF THE BOAT? 318 00:13:47,627 --> 00:13:48,595 THE BOW. 319 00:13:48,628 --> 00:13:49,863 WHAT IS THE BACK? 320 00:13:49,897 --> 00:13:51,064 STERN. 321 00:13:51,098 --> 00:13:52,532 NUMBER THREE: "RIGHT" IS... 322 00:13:52,565 --> 00:13:53,901 STARBOARD. 323 00:13:53,934 --> 00:13:55,402 PORT, SKIPPER, DECK, CABIN 324 00:13:55,435 --> 00:13:57,104 GALLEY, KEEL, 1924. 325 00:13:57,137 --> 00:13:59,172 YOU'VE PASSED THE ORAL TEST. 326 00:13:59,206 --> 00:14:00,440 WHAT A SURPRISE! 327 00:14:00,473 --> 00:14:06,579 NOW IT'S TIME TO ONCE AGAIN TAKE THE DRIVING PORTION OF THE EXAM. 328 00:14:06,613 --> 00:14:08,148 OKAY, SPONGEBOB. 329 00:14:09,316 --> 00:14:10,951 GET IN THE BOAT. 330 00:14:10,984 --> 00:14:12,953 OH, IN THIS BOAT, RIGHT HERE? 331 00:14:12,986 --> 00:14:14,087 IS IT TIME ALREADY? 332 00:14:14,121 --> 00:14:15,989 GET IN THE BOAT, SPONGEBOB. 333 00:14:16,023 --> 00:14:17,557 OH, YEAH, ABSOLUTELY. 334 00:14:17,590 --> 00:14:21,161 ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS GET ON THE TRACK. 335 00:14:24,231 --> 00:14:28,401 OKAY, SPONGEBOB, WHAT'S THE FIRST THING YOU DO? 336 00:14:28,435 --> 00:14:29,469 1924? 337 00:14:29,502 --> 00:14:30,503 NO, NO. 338 00:14:30,537 --> 00:14:33,240 FIRST THING IS TO START THE BOAT. 339 00:14:33,273 --> 00:14:35,408 ( yelling ) 340 00:14:35,442 --> 00:14:36,443 SPONGEBOB! 341 00:14:36,476 --> 00:14:38,211 SPONGEBOB, RELAX. 342 00:14:38,245 --> 00:14:39,379 IT'S ONLY THE BOAT. 343 00:14:39,412 --> 00:14:40,413 THE BOAT? 344 00:14:40,447 --> 00:14:42,615 OKAY, NOW, WHAT DO YOU DO NEXT? 345 00:14:42,649 --> 00:14:43,683 FLOOR IT? 346 00:14:43,716 --> 00:14:44,684 YES-- NO! 347 00:14:44,717 --> 00:14:46,086 NO, DON'T FLOOR IT. 348 00:14:46,119 --> 00:14:47,087 FLOOR IT? 349 00:14:47,120 --> 00:14:48,355 NO, DON'T, DON'T FLOOR IT! 350 00:14:48,388 --> 00:14:49,356 OKAY, FLOOR IT. 351 00:14:49,389 --> 00:14:50,590 NO, NO, NO! 352 00:14:50,623 --> 00:14:52,993 ( Mrs. Puff screaming ) 353 00:14:53,026 --> 00:14:55,028 ( crash ) 354 00:14:55,062 --> 00:14:56,263 ( inflating ) 355 00:14:56,296 --> 00:14:57,998 ( crash ) 356 00:14:58,031 --> 00:15:02,369 ( in deep voice ): OH, SPONGEBOB... WHY? 357 00:15:06,239 --> 00:15:07,707 I DON'T KNOW WHY, GARY. 358 00:15:07,740 --> 00:15:09,176 I DON'T KNOW. 359 00:15:09,209 --> 00:15:11,611 I'M TIRED OF FAILING THAT BOATING TEST. 360 00:15:11,644 --> 00:15:14,014 I'VE ALREADY TAKEN IT 37 TIMES. 361 00:15:14,047 --> 00:15:15,148 ( meows ) 362 00:15:15,182 --> 00:15:17,250 OKAY, 38. 363 00:15:17,284 --> 00:15:18,451 ( meowing ) 364 00:15:18,485 --> 00:15:20,653 NO, GARY, I'M NOT WALKING. 365 00:15:20,687 --> 00:15:24,424 Patrick: SpongeBob, this is Star Ranger, over. 366 00:15:24,457 --> 00:15:26,359 WHAT IS IT, PATRICK? 367 00:15:26,393 --> 00:15:28,328 I got a surprise for you. 368 00:15:28,361 --> 00:15:30,697 OH, PATRICK, I'M NOT IN THE MOOD. 369 00:15:30,730 --> 00:15:31,931 Get out of bed. 370 00:15:34,367 --> 00:15:36,569 OKAY, NOW WHAT, PATRICK? 371 00:15:36,603 --> 00:15:39,672 Go to your closet for a surprise. 372 00:15:43,276 --> 00:15:45,078 OKAY, I'M AT THE CLOSET. 373 00:15:45,112 --> 00:15:46,379 Listen carefully. 374 00:15:46,413 --> 00:15:49,016 What's pink and square at the same time? 375 00:15:49,049 --> 00:15:50,350 I DON'T KNOW, PATRICK. 376 00:15:50,383 --> 00:15:53,320 PATRICK SQUAREPANTS. 377 00:15:53,353 --> 00:15:55,122 PAT, DON'T DO THAT. 378 00:15:55,155 --> 00:15:57,657 I'VE GOT TOO MUCH TO WORRY ABOUT. 379 00:15:57,690 --> 00:16:00,060 WHAT'S THE PROBLEM? 380 00:16:00,093 --> 00:16:02,395 I CAN'T PASS MY BOATING EXAM. 381 00:16:02,429 --> 00:16:03,997 I'VE TAKEN IT 37... 382 00:16:04,031 --> 00:16:05,065 ( Gary meows ) 383 00:16:05,098 --> 00:16:06,266 38 TIMES. 384 00:16:06,299 --> 00:16:07,700 I KNOW ALL THE ANSWERS... 385 00:16:07,734 --> 00:16:09,636 UNTIL I GET BEHIND THE WHEEL. 386 00:16:09,669 --> 00:16:10,770 I JUST NEED SOMETHING 387 00:16:10,803 --> 00:16:12,439 TO HELP ME THINK STRAIGHT. 388 00:16:12,472 --> 00:16:14,241 THINKING STRAIGHT IS WHAT I DO. 389 00:16:14,274 --> 00:16:17,477 YOU DRIVE, AND I'LL DO ALL THE THINKING FOR YOU. 390 00:16:17,510 --> 00:16:18,911 HOW ARE WE GOING TO DO THAT? 391 00:16:22,782 --> 00:16:24,084 COME IN, SPONGEBOB. 392 00:16:24,117 --> 00:16:25,118 HELLO. 393 00:16:25,152 --> 00:16:26,119 Hello. 394 00:16:26,153 --> 00:16:28,188 HEY, I CAN HEAR YOU IN MY HEAD. 395 00:16:28,221 --> 00:16:30,723 THIS IS GREAT-- WHILE I'M TAKING THE TEST 396 00:16:30,757 --> 00:16:32,725 YOU CAN GIVE ME ALL THE ANSWERS. 397 00:16:34,327 --> 00:16:36,263 WAIT A MINUTE, PATRICK. 398 00:16:36,296 --> 00:16:40,633 WON'T I LOOK SILLY WITH THIS ANTENNA COMING OUT OF MY HEAD? 399 00:16:43,336 --> 00:16:48,341 Pat to Sponge, Pat to Sponge, testing, testing. 400 00:16:48,375 --> 00:16:50,677 TESTING, TESTING, TESTING, TESTING, TESTING 401 00:16:50,710 --> 00:16:53,280 testing, testing! 402 00:16:53,313 --> 00:16:54,314 ( yells ) 403 00:16:54,347 --> 00:16:56,349 Test, test! Do you read? 404 00:16:56,383 --> 00:16:59,119 SPONGE TO PAT, I READ YOU LOUD AND CLEAR, OVER. 405 00:16:59,152 --> 00:17:00,420 GOT YOUR APPLE READY? 406 00:17:01,621 --> 00:17:03,290 LUCKY UNDERGARMENTS? 407 00:17:03,323 --> 00:17:05,592 Hold on, hold on... 408 00:17:05,625 --> 00:17:06,593 Bingo! 409 00:17:06,626 --> 00:17:10,130 Underwear, apple and me. 410 00:17:10,163 --> 00:17:12,165 You're ready to get that license. 411 00:17:12,199 --> 00:17:13,766 Oh-oh, here comes Mrs. Puff. 412 00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:15,335 Act natural. 413 00:17:17,637 --> 00:17:20,640 ( mooing like cow ) 414 00:17:20,673 --> 00:17:23,576 No, no... get in the boat. 415 00:17:23,610 --> 00:17:26,513 ( siren approaches ) 416 00:17:31,384 --> 00:17:33,420 Give her the apple. 417 00:17:33,453 --> 00:17:35,422 HERE YOU GO, MA'AM. 418 00:17:36,523 --> 00:17:38,525 LET'S GET THIS OVER WITH. 419 00:17:38,558 --> 00:17:41,628 ( breathes deeply ) 420 00:17:41,661 --> 00:17:44,531 WHAT'S THE FIRST THING YOU DO? 421 00:17:46,233 --> 00:17:46,833 I... 422 00:17:46,866 --> 00:17:48,801 Start the boat. 423 00:17:52,305 --> 00:17:53,273 ( motor starts ) 424 00:17:53,306 --> 00:17:54,274 ( yelling ) 425 00:17:54,307 --> 00:17:55,275 MRS. PUFF. 426 00:17:55,308 --> 00:17:56,109 MRS. PUFF! 427 00:17:56,143 --> 00:17:57,144 WHOA! 428 00:17:57,177 --> 00:17:58,278 HUH? WHAT? 429 00:17:58,311 --> 00:18:00,347 IT'S OKAY, IT'S ONLY THE BOAT. 430 00:18:00,380 --> 00:18:01,348 THE BOAT! 431 00:18:01,381 --> 00:18:02,882 YOU STARTED THE BOAT? 432 00:18:02,915 --> 00:18:04,617 I... I THINK SO. 433 00:18:04,651 --> 00:18:06,219 OH. 434 00:18:06,253 --> 00:18:07,587 WELL... 435 00:18:07,620 --> 00:18:10,257 WHAT'S THE SECOND THING YOU DO? 436 00:18:10,290 --> 00:18:11,591 1924? 437 00:18:11,624 --> 00:18:14,661 No, no... put it in drive. 438 00:18:14,694 --> 00:18:15,662 PUT IT IN DRIVE? 439 00:18:15,695 --> 00:18:18,165 YES, YES, YES! 440 00:18:18,198 --> 00:18:19,899 PUT IT IN DRIVE! 441 00:18:19,932 --> 00:18:20,900 THEN WHAT? 442 00:18:20,933 --> 00:18:21,901 FLOOR IT? 443 00:18:21,934 --> 00:18:22,902 NO, NO! 444 00:18:22,935 --> 00:18:24,771 Freeze, mister. 445 00:18:24,804 --> 00:18:26,273 BIG TOE. 446 00:18:30,543 --> 00:18:32,212 OH, GRACIOUS. 447 00:18:32,245 --> 00:18:33,580 OH, GRACIOUS! 448 00:18:33,613 --> 00:18:36,516 ( laughing nervously ) 449 00:18:36,549 --> 00:18:38,218 WE HAVEN'T CRASHED YET. 450 00:18:38,251 --> 00:18:39,486 OKAY, YOU'RE COMING 451 00:18:39,519 --> 00:18:40,787 to your first turn. 452 00:18:40,820 --> 00:18:43,423 OH, NO, THE FIRST TURN. 453 00:18:43,456 --> 00:18:45,358 PLEASE, TELL ME YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO 454 00:18:45,392 --> 00:18:46,493 AT THE FIRST TURN. 455 00:18:46,526 --> 00:18:47,494 Left. 456 00:18:47,527 --> 00:18:48,761 Right! 457 00:18:48,795 --> 00:18:52,432 OH, MY, THIS IS SPLENDID, SPONGEBOB. 458 00:18:52,465 --> 00:18:54,367 YOU'RE DOING FINE. 459 00:19:01,541 --> 00:19:03,276 ( no voice ) 460 00:19:53,393 --> 00:19:54,661 Mrs. Puff: SPLENDID! 461 00:19:54,694 --> 00:19:56,663 ( laughing ) 462 00:19:56,696 --> 00:19:58,298 WONDERFUL. 463 00:19:58,331 --> 00:19:59,632 THERE'S THE FINISH LINE. 464 00:19:59,666 --> 00:20:00,900 IT'S UNBELIEVABLE. 465 00:20:00,933 --> 00:20:04,304 YOU'VE SHOWN THE MOST SPECTACULAR IMPROVEMENT 466 00:20:04,337 --> 00:20:06,473 OF ANY STUDENT I'VE EVER SEEN. 467 00:20:06,506 --> 00:20:07,740 WHAT'S YOUR SECRET-- 468 00:20:07,774 --> 00:20:09,776 A LITTLE RADIO IN YOUR HEAD? 469 00:20:09,809 --> 00:20:11,811 ( laughing ) 470 00:20:13,613 --> 00:20:16,349 ( laughing ) 471 00:20:16,383 --> 00:20:18,551 OH, AND UNDER THAT HAT 472 00:20:18,585 --> 00:20:21,388 IS SOME KIND OF ANTENNA? 473 00:20:21,421 --> 00:20:22,855 ( laughing ) 474 00:20:26,593 --> 00:20:29,929 ( laughing ) 475 00:20:29,962 --> 00:20:33,733 AND SOME GUY MILES AWAY FROM HERE 476 00:20:33,766 --> 00:20:37,404 IS GIVING YOU ALL THE ANSWERS. 477 00:20:37,437 --> 00:20:39,272 ( laughing ) 478 00:20:41,541 --> 00:20:44,544 ( laughing uproariously ) 479 00:20:47,514 --> 00:20:48,381 OH, YES... 480 00:20:48,415 --> 00:20:50,917 BUT THAT WOULD BE CHEATING. 481 00:20:50,950 --> 00:20:54,020 ( Patrick laughs uproariously ) 482 00:20:54,053 --> 00:20:55,755 Aha! cheating! 483 00:20:55,788 --> 00:20:58,591 ( Patrick laughing loudly ) 484 00:20:58,625 --> 00:21:00,026 I'M CHEATING? 485 00:21:00,059 --> 00:21:01,027 MRS. PUFF? 486 00:21:01,060 --> 00:21:02,895 YES, MY STAR PUPIL. 487 00:21:02,929 --> 00:21:05,031 I THINK I'M CHEATING. 488 00:21:05,064 --> 00:21:06,799 WHAT'S THAT, DEAR? 489 00:21:06,833 --> 00:21:08,901 I THINK I AM CHEATING! 490 00:21:08,935 --> 00:21:10,937 YOU... YOU'VE LET GO OF THE WHEEL. 491 00:21:10,970 --> 00:21:12,972 I DO HAVE AN ANTENNA UNDER MY HAT. 492 00:21:13,005 --> 00:21:15,408 THERE IS A GUY GIVING ME ALL THE ANSWERS. 493 00:21:15,442 --> 00:21:16,409 IT'S ALL TRUE. 494 00:21:16,443 --> 00:21:17,844 I'M CHEATING, I'M CHEATING. 495 00:21:17,877 --> 00:21:18,845 I'M CHEATING. 496 00:21:18,878 --> 00:21:19,912 WHAT? 497 00:21:19,946 --> 00:21:22,014 ( sobbing mournfully ) 498 00:21:24,551 --> 00:21:26,919 I'M SORRY, MRS. PUFF. 499 00:21:26,953 --> 00:21:27,920 I'M SORRY. 500 00:21:27,954 --> 00:21:29,322 THE WHEEL, SPONGEBOB. 501 00:21:29,356 --> 00:21:30,323 THE WHEEL. 502 00:21:30,357 --> 00:21:31,458 SpongeBob: CHEATING! 503 00:21:31,491 --> 00:21:33,593 I'M A CHEATER. 504 00:21:33,626 --> 00:21:34,827 NO, NO, NO! 505 00:21:34,861 --> 00:21:37,029 Mrs. Puff: IT'S ALL RIGHT, YOU CAN CHEAT. 506 00:21:37,063 --> 00:21:38,531 SpongeBob: I'M CHEATING. 507 00:21:38,565 --> 00:21:39,999 Mrs. Puff: THAT WAY, SPONGEBOB. 508 00:21:40,032 --> 00:21:40,933 I'M CHEATING. 509 00:21:40,967 --> 00:21:42,335 Mrs. Puff: CHEAT THAT WAY! 510 00:21:42,369 --> 00:21:43,470 "CHEATER, CHEATER 511 00:21:43,503 --> 00:21:44,704 PUMPKIN EATER." 512 00:21:44,737 --> 00:21:46,105 Mrs. Puff: IT'S OKAY, JUST... 513 00:21:46,138 --> 00:21:47,674 SpongeBob: NO! 514 00:21:47,707 --> 00:21:49,576 THAT WAY! THAT WAY! 515 00:21:49,609 --> 00:21:50,777 CHEAT THAT WAY! 516 00:21:50,810 --> 00:21:51,978 SpongeBob: CHEATER! 517 00:21:52,011 --> 00:21:53,580 ( crash ) 518 00:21:54,714 --> 00:21:57,750 ( inflating ) 519 00:21:57,784 --> 00:21:59,886 OH, SPONGEBOB. 520 00:21:59,919 --> 00:22:02,555 WHY? 521 00:22:02,589 --> 00:22:03,556 MRS. PUFF? 522 00:22:03,590 --> 00:22:05,057 I THINK I CHEATED. 523 00:22:05,091 --> 00:22:05,958 Man: MY LEG! 524 00:22:08,127 --> 00:22:11,498 I'M SORRY FOR LETTING YOU DOWN AGAIN, MRS. PUFF. 525 00:22:11,531 --> 00:22:12,965 IT'S OKAY, SPONGEBOB. 526 00:22:12,999 --> 00:22:14,767 YOU DIDN'T MEAN IT. 527 00:22:14,801 --> 00:22:18,638 OKAY, BOYS, TAKE ME AWAY. 528 00:22:18,671 --> 00:22:20,072 ( grunts ) 529 00:22:21,441 --> 00:22:23,075 DON'T WORRY, MRS. PUFF. 530 00:22:23,109 --> 00:22:25,645 I'LL TRY HARDER NEXT SEMESTER. 531 00:22:25,678 --> 00:22:27,747 ( sobbing ) 532 00:22:28,748 --> 00:22:30,016 IT'LL BE GREAT! 533 00:22:32,419 --> 00:22:34,887 ONLY NOW I DON'T EVEN HAVE MY BIKE. 534 00:22:34,921 --> 00:22:36,155 ( Gary meows ) 535 00:22:36,188 --> 00:22:37,390 GARY! 536 00:22:37,424 --> 00:22:39,492 MY BIKE! 537 00:22:39,526 --> 00:22:40,927 YOU'VE FOUND IT. 538 00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:43,530 THIS SPONGE IS STILL MOBILE. 539 00:22:47,800 --> 00:22:52,104 ALL RIGHT, LET'S GO SURPRISE SOMEONE AT THE HOSPITAL. 540 00:22:59,111 --> 00:23:01,714 [Captioning sponsored by THE and NICKELODEON] 541 00:23:31,611 --> 00:23:34,981 [Captioned by The Caption Center WGBH Educational Foundation] 33406

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