Original subtitles

(upbeat music)

♪ Sugar ♪

♪ Honey, honey ♪

(bike bell ringing)

♪ You are my candy, girl ♪

♪ You got me wanting you ♪

♪ When I kissed you, girl ♪

♪ I knew how sweet a kiss could be ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ Just like the summer sunshine ♪

♪ Pour your sweet love over me ♪

(man vocalizing)

♪ Sugar ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Honey, honey ♪

- Mr. Weatherbee, we're late.

- One moment, Ms. Grundy.

Can't you see I'm helping.

♪ You got me wanting you ♪

Perfect.

♪ I got to say ♪

♪ Sugar, yeah ♪

- Mr. Weatherbee, it's Veronica Lodge.

♪ Honey, honey ♪

No, it's not a bad connection.

I'm calling from Paris.

Paris.

Paris, Mr. Weatherbee.

You know the one in France?

France, Mr. Weatherbee.

It doesn't matter where I am.

I'm calling about the reunion.

Will Archie be there?

Archie Andrews.

Of course, I'll hold.

(bell ringing)

- Well, that's the last bell we'll hear for two months.

Everyone have a wonderful summer.

Gonna miss you.

Play hard.

Try and remember Ms. Cooper.

- [Robert] Hey.

- Honey, you're early.

- Okay, the gas tank is full, suitcases are packed,

and if you'll drive,

I'll get all my paperwork outta the way.

Well, almost all of it.

- I can't wait for you to meet everyone.

- Especially Archie.

I know it's insecure, but I just don't like old boyfriends.

- Well, Archie's not an old boyfriend.

He's,

it's hard to explain.

- He is?

Wonderful.

Thank you, Mr. Weatherbee.

Smithers, were you ever tempted

to go back to your first love?

- No, madame, but only because I married her.

- Most of us weren't that smart.

Book me on the first Concord to Riverdale.

- I don't believe the Concord flies to Riverdale, madame.

- We'll have to talk to Daddy about that.

- Yes, madame.

- I love it.

- New job, new look.

Oh, don't wear it to the reunion, hun.

Save it for Monday.

You ready for city life?

- (sighs) Four long days and one little trial,

then it's goodbye Riverdale,

hello, two bedroom, two bath with park view.

Can't wait.

- I categorize the boxes for you.

Green stickers get moved,

and orange stickers goes straight to the Salvation Army.

- Okay. - Bye.

- Bye.

Thanks.

(door clicks) (dog barking)

Honey, honey, my varsity jacket.

No, I, I, I love this jacket.

And my mother's toaster.

No, look, look, Pam, Pam,

we, we gotta keep this, this is a collector's item.

- It started a fire.

- A small fire.

And all my belts.

Gee, can't we just throw out the ugly ones?

- Belts are utilitarian, suspenders are statement,

everyone at Gibson Cratchit Law wears suspenders.

- You don't.

(Pam giggles)

Look, soon dum, dum, dum.

(children laughing)

(car door clicks)

You sure you don't wanna stay for the reunion?

- It's you they wanna see.

I'd just in there nodding and smiling.

You wanna know what I found out at my high school reunion?

- What?

- Absolutely nothing.

I'll keep the apartment warm for you.

(car door bangs)

- I'll miss you.

Till Monday.

- And?

- And I'll call three times a day.

- And?

- Gibson, Cratchit, and Andrews.

- You just wait.

(car engine revving)

(car engine roaring)

- I'm gonna keep this jacket.

Huh, ah, oh, Moose, Moose, now just take it easy.

- Archie's all alignment today.

(bones cracking)

He must be nervous about seeing Betty and Veronica.

- Not when he's got getting married to be nervous about.

- You know, I hate when guys complain about getting married.

- Me too.

- Then they complain about being married

and about their kids and about their divorce.

- [Moose] Which they could have avoided

if they didn't complain in the first place.

- Well, I'm sure Veronica barely remembers me.

And Betty, well, Betty's still looking for someone

as sweet as she is.

Of course, nobody is.

- You know, Archie always had a soft spot for those two.

- I guess nothing changes.

- (groaning) Well, that's where you're wrong, Moose.

See, some things do change.

(Archie groaning)

(bones cracking)

- [Jughead] It's not so much the world

that's bothering me today,

although it's rotting as we speak.

It's my personal life.

Never play poker with your wife.

- Because it could encourage competition over communication.

- Because she could win.

My ex-wife beat me every time.

It wasn't a marriage.

No, it was a six year hand and I was out bluffed.

- Hmm.

- Yeah, now she's getting remarried,

and I get Jordan, I love him, but he's wild.

Lack of a strong father figure, I guess.

Not that I missed a single weekend,

and I know he loves me too intellectually,

but we don't have a real relationship.

I'm scared stiff.

(phone buzzes)

- [Secretary] Sorry, doctor.

But there's a Mr. Weatherbee on the line

demanding to know if someone named Jughead

is coming to a reunion.

- Uh, tell Mr. Weatherbee I'll be there.

Well, I'm sorry, our time's up for today.

Oh, was there something you wanted to discuss?

- No, Doc.

Hearing your problems always makes my life seem much better.

- Well, I didn't go to medical school for nothing.

Okay.

Huh.

(traffic humming) (birds chirping)

So what should we talk about?

- [Jordan] I don't know, Dad.

(group chattering)

- We've got to get our interpersonal communication going.

Pick a topic, anything.

- I don't know, Dad.

- Aren't there certain like,

questions you'd like to ask me maybe?

And don't say, I don't know, Dad.

- What you holding?

- Oh, me.

Well, I, I've got three aces.

- Full house.

- Uh, uh, good, good for you.

(upbeat music)

- Linda. - Yeah.

(hands clapping)

♪ Da-da-da ♪

- Pig John, meal break.

♪ Da-na ♪

(door clicks)

♪ Ah-ah-ah ♪

Yo, Geeky.

Pig John and I are forming a metal band.

You better get your autograph while they're cheap.

- And while we're still giving them to geeks like you.

- Yeah, I was in a band before you guys even existed.

But you do have one advantage.

- And what's that?

- Well, you see, we had to buy drums.

Now you can just hit your heads

to get that deep hollow sound.

- Hmm.

- You better try selling that stuff

to somebody dumb enough to buy it.

Oh, look at you in your suit.

You can't wait to get out of our little town, can you?

- I can't wait to get out in the world.

You know, rumor has it,

lots of things are happening out there.

- Archie, the only thing worth

giving a hoot about happens in here.

(Pop chuckling)

- Oh, Pop.

You know, Pops, these guys are eating you

outta house and home.

- And you guys didn't?

What's good for the kids-

- Is good for Pops.

(plane engine humming)

(plane engine roaring)

It's the Concord.

- (chuckles) Archie Andrews.

You may think you're all wise in the ways of the world,

but everyone knows the Concord doesn't fly to Riverdale.

(Pop laughs)

(traffic humming) (car door bangs)

- [Man] Yeah, I read that in the paper actually.

(birds chirping)

(door clicks) (bell ringing)

- Hey, Arch, did I see you in a Beamer the other day?

- Yeah, my, my fiances.

- Oh, I should have know.

Hey, why don't you come on down to Downtown Reggie's Motors?

I'll fix you up in something flashy.

You'll be making some bucks soon.

Hey, I'll even finance you.

- At 20%.

- Hey, only a fool gives money away, right?

- Well, you're the one who'd know about that, Reggie.

- (chuckles) You betcha.

(Reggie chuckles)

- Archie, uh, Reggie and I have some business to discuss.

(bell ringing) (door clicks)

(birds chirping)

(door bangs) (bell rings)

(upbeat music)

- Hey, Archie.

(girl laughing)

- Hold on. - Yeah.

(girl grunts)

(girl laughing)

- Hold on, hold on. - Yeah.

(brooding music)

- It's been some time since we spoke.

- Miss me?

- I find even the slightest contact painful.

(car engine roaring)

(metal thuds) (horn honking)

My sixth driver this year.

As our country decays it becomes ever harder

to find good help.

- Yeah. I, I, I guess they just don't realize

how lucky they are to be working for a man like you.

- Are a mosquito, Archie,

inconsequential, but capable of a low, annoying buzz.

You're a lightweight, a sim, a piece of-

- Well-

- White bread.

In the past, you were unable to pollute Veronica

with your mediocrity.

I intend to keep it that way.

You will see her only as necessitated by reunion functions.

You will not attempt to pursue her,

to foist your charms on her.

- Hey, hey, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Look, I'm engaged.

Veronica's an old friend, I'm looking forward to seeing her

and that's it.

Not that it's any of your business.

(brakes squeaking)

- Everything in Riverdale is my business.

- Well, I'm glad we had this little chat.

(car door clicks) (birds chirping)

(dog barking)

(limo engine roaring) (tires screeching)

- Okay, Dad.

- What a town.

(ball thuds)

(slow tempo playful music)

(door clicks) (dog barking)

Hey.

How'd you get in here, kid?

(gun whirring)

(Archie gasps)

Why you.

(playful music)

You little.

Come here, you little hoodlum.

Oh, oh, if I get my hands on you.

Whoa.

- Hey.

(Archie grunting)

- I got you now.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

(Archie groans)

(body thuds) (playful music)

(Jordan chuckles) (Archie groans)

(upbeat music)

- Arch.

- Jughead.

- Jughead?

(Archie chuckling)

(Jughead laughing)

- Come here you.

How are you?

- Say hello to your Uncle Archie.

- He's not my uncle.

- Oh, that's okay, just call me Archie.

- Super dumb name.

- Yeah, maybe.

But it's not half as dumb as Jughead Jr.

- You call me that again and something really bad'll happen.

- Whew.

- Takes after his mom huh?

I tried to keep in touch.

- Yeah, me too.

- So, uh,

how are you?

- Well, I'm not great at all.

I'm horrible, Arch.

I'm really lonely.

- (chuckles) I'm sure that's just temporary.

- And I'm phobic.

I can't look at a woman without seeing my ex-wife.

- You'll get over that.

- And I'm a stranger to my own son, who's actually,

he's not a bad kid as long as you don't mind living

through the really violent outtakes of "The Exorcist".

- You look good.

(door clicks)

(door bangs)

Veronica is kicking off the weekend

with a luncheon tea for all of her friends.

- You never drank tea in high school?

- I never drank anything in high school.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, don't plug that toaster in.

- Why?

- I'll handle this.

Jordan, do not plug in that toaster.

(Archie grunts)

(electricity hissing) (Archie yelling)

(birds chirping)

I'm sure the burn marks will wash off the ceiling.

- No problem.

- Think maybe you should put on another tie.

- Everything's packed.

- You know, there might be just enough material

to make a bow tie.

- A?

(classical music)

- Make sure there's a flower arrange man on each table.

Keep the champagne fountain full.

Do you have enough ice?

Great.

(Veronica sighs)

(Veronica gasps)

Hi!

(both laughing)

Look what you did with your hair.

- I cut it myself.

- Don't tell me you made that dress.

- Oh, this is just something I got on sale.

Where did you get yours?

- Oh, Armani, Versace.

I mean, who can keep track?

- [Man] You're looking forward to it.

(car door clicks)

- Coming?

Jughead.

- He gets like this.

Dad, car's on fire.

You'll be burned to a crisp.

Nuclear war, Dad, your flesh is gonna melt off.

- What a cute little boy.

- I just remembered Big Ethel.

- Big what?

- Ethel had a crush on your father

and she wasn't terribly attractive.

- The woman lurked behind every corner.

She was relentless.

- Dad's afraid of women.

- Mmm. - Yeah, women sure.

Yeah women and Big Ethel.

- Are you ready?

Let's do it.

(car door bangs) (upbeat jazz music)

- You got my card right?

- Hey, Reg.

Ouch.

Neck looks way out of alignment.

- You stay away from me, you big creep.

- So are we okay about Archie?

- Ronnie, I'm in love with Robert.

- Just checking.

(gentle music)

(water splashing)

- Jughead, I'm in trouble.

- Got any food back at your house?

- I got the prom tickets today.

If I take Betty, Veronica will hate me

and never talk to me again.

If I take Veronica, Betty will be crushed.

- And hate you and never talk to you again.

- Jughead, help me come up with a plan or something.

- Let me think.

Hmm.

Got me, this one's a stumper.

(Archie sighs)

Hey, if it's any consolation 15 years from now,

this'll seem like a real minor problem.

(gentle music)

(birds chirping)

- Oh, my god. - I know.

- (chuckles) Long time.

- Has it? - It sure has.

(Betty giggles)

- Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Ronnie.

- Robert Miller.

Call me Bob.

- Bob.

- Hi.

- [Betty] Jughead.

- Waka, waka.

- And this is Jughead Junior.

(foot thuds) (Archie groans)

- Little rascal.

(upbeat music)

- The hot '80's thing was spending a lot of time

you didn't have getting in shape.

But for the '90's you'll be spending a lot of money

you don't have on luxury cars, you'll see.

- Excuse me.

- Hi, Ms. Grundy.

You look even more beautiful than usual.

- Get your elbows off the table.

- Oh, Midge and I tried practicing in the city,

but it wasn't for us.

The last straw was a parking ticket.

I go to court and I ask the judge, why'd I get a ticket?

I've been parking there for three months.

The judge asked me, "If I read the sign?"

So I say, "The sign said fine for parking,

so I parked there."

(Robert chuckles)

- Hi.

Hi.

- There you are. - Hey, Jug.

- So writing didn't work out,

and I moved to Midvale and started teaching second grade.

The pay is not great, but the kids are.

I can't wait until I start having my own.

- We're in negotiation on that.

- Hi. - Hi.

- So how do I look?

- You want a professional opinion?

- Sure.

- You look terrific.

That'll be $120.

(Reggie chuckles)

- I've been taking care of business for daddy overseas,

trying to learn the languages.

Enough about me.

What have you been doing?

- Oh, not much until Monday morning.

Then I'm finally kissing this town goodbye.

- Really?

- Yeah, next, next week,

I'll be working for the biggest law firm in the city.

And I'm moving in with my fiance.

- Your fiance.

(glass clanging) (group chattering)

- Ms. Grundy, a toast.

- I consider you all living proof

that common sense can be pounded into young people's heads.

(group laughing)

- I'll drink to that.

- I have so much planned, picnics, field trips, a concert.

(Veronica laughing)

That's right, a concert.

At the party Sunday night

we're having the greatest band in Riverdale High history.

The Archies.

(group gasping)

- Did you know about this? - I didn't know.

- [Archie] Ronnie.

- You're Moose's son, aren't you?

He certainly is.

- I'm Jordan.

- Max.

- I'll let you two bond.

- Betcha I can think of worse things

to do to Archie than you can.

- Cool.

(group chattering)

- What a place right?

- Always has been.

- What a hostess.

Reminds me of this hot little number

I picked up in a museum.

It was before I met Betty of course.

- Of course.

- Hey, don't give me wrong,

Betty's the best thing that ever happened to me.

We're even talking about getting married.

But you know how it is.

- How exactly is it, Bob?

- It's kinda hard for a guy like me

to think about getting married without getting nervous.

- You should have heard this Robert call me Bob Guy.

Gotta talk to Betty.

- Compensational denial, Arch.

It's not just Betty's welfare you're worried about.

- Uncle Archie. - Yeah.

- Can Max sleep over?

- We'll have a pajama party from hell.

- That means yes.

- I'll go tell my dad.

- Now look if-

- Andrews you should have told me.

- Look at the resemblance.

- Oh, no, no, no, he, he's not.

- Shame, Andrews, you didn't even tell me you were married.

- I'm not married, Mr. Weatherbee.

(Ms. Grundy gasps)

- Shame, Andrews, shame.

(Archie sighs)

- There you are, sir.

Thank you.

(group chattering)

- Alone it last.

I never forgot you, Archie.

I can mend this for you.

- Oh.

- Maybe later, maybe tonight?

Then it's a date.

(gentle upbeat music)

(ominous music)

- [Staff] All right, take care.

- Strike one.

- Jughead, Betty is crazy glued at the hip to this guy.

Now how can I get her alone?

- Hmm.

- Archie, forget the blonde stuff.

Veronica's the ticket.

- [Jughead] Archie, if you wanna be with Betty,

maybe Jordy and I should take Robert

on a little tour of Riverdale.

- That was a dirty trick.

- It's the only way I could get you away from Robert.

- I don't wanna be away from Robert.

- So where'd you meet him?

- In a museum.

- A museum?

- Yes, Archie, a museum.

Is there something wrong with that?

- No, no, of course not.

What could possibly be wrong with that?

- I was staring at a Picasso

and I looked up and Robert was staring at me.

Finally, he came over and asked me,

"What was I doing for the rest of my life?"

- He didn't.

- He did.

Archie, what's the problem?

- Robert.

He pushes you around.

He's, he's two-faced.

For God's sakes, Betty, he's an MBA.

- And your suit looks just like his.

Are you angry I'm dating someone like you?

- Like me, like, like me.

Gee, Betty, I think you're judging his book by its cover.

And if I were you, I'd catch up on my reading.

- Here, my latest story.

- I didn't know you wanted to be a writer.

- I wanna be both, a writer and a teacher.

(Archie clears throat)

- It was a beautiful sunny day for the Easter egg hunt.

- Well?

- It's, it's really sweet.

- That's what the publishers say too sweet.

But I'm not giving up, I have something to say.

I, I just don't know what it is yet.

- Guess what I found?

(Betty and Archie giggling)

- Oh.

Look at us.

- God, how many times do we sit right here in this booth?

- Say, you remember the time

that we helped Pops paint the store?

- Yes.

And when Mr. Weatherbee caught us cutting class

at the amusement park.

- Oh, yeah, yeah.

I talked him into going up on the roller coaster with us.

He wouldn't speak to me for weeks.

(Betty giggles)

(gentle music)

- Remember the night of the storm.

- When we got stuck

and we couldn't get home until morning

and our parents thought that we.

- But we didn't.

- We did.

I can't believe that you don't remember.

- Archie, I'm, I'm sure I'd remember if we.

(Archie chuckles)

(Betty chuckles)

Archie.

- Oh boy, it was a long time ago.

- Look at the time.

- Hey babe, what do you say you-

- Yeah, go cipher some gas, pal.

- Please.

You can't do this to me.

Reggie, wait.

(phone thuds)

- [Archie] Pops.

- Reggie's evicting me.

He's expanding that, that thing.

- Well, he can't do that.

- Yes he can.

He owns the building.

(door clicks) (bell ringing)

- He can't do that.

- [Jughead] I got lost.

- Driving around your hometown?

- Oh, well see, Jughead has a notoriously

bad sense of direction.

- Get a compass.

- Yeah, okay.

Hey, was that teamwork or what?

- I don't know.

- Sure, I can do it.

- Keep it together. - Legal as an 18 year old.

- Reggie, Reggie, Pops kept that place for us.

So we'd have a place to eat, and talk, and grow up.

- And we did.

You grew up, I grew up, and I'm kicking him out.

Only you're still playing the patsy, Arch,

just like high school.

Giving everybody else the breaks and not getting any.

Look don't get me wrong.

But if you wanna get the finer things outta life,

you gotta put this knee jerk, goody goody act to bed.

- Wrong, Reggie, I changed, I changed plenty,

but you, you just got worse.

- You're leaving, what do you care?

- Because I have a heart.

Don't you have any feelings?

- Okay, I'll make you a deal.

You ask Pop how much it's gonna cost him

to set up a new place

and I'll write him a check for old time sake.

- Reggie, you can't buy old times or a clean conscience.

- What can I say, I'm torture.

- [Instructor] Out, side, up, and down.

Good.

Going. - Sir, Reggie Mantle here.

- [Instructor] Good.

- Listen, sir, we're gonna have a little problem

with the health club expansion.

I had to offer some moving expenses.

Yes, sir, I know, I understand it's your money.

But you see, I'm under community pressure.

- From whom?

- [Reggie] Archie Andrews, sir.

- Strike two.

♪ Me wanting you ♪

♪ Honey ♪

♪ Ah, sugar, sugar ♪

♪ You are my candy, girl ♪

♪ And you've got me wanting you ♪

- Well?

♪ I just can't ♪

- It's great.

What is it?

- It's me.

Yeah, Jordy.

♪ I just can't believe the wonder ♪

- [Jordan] It's okay.

♪ I just can't ♪

- Hi guys.

♪ It's true ♪

- Can we go to bed now?

- Oh yeah, sure.

♪ Ah, honey, honey ♪

(record hisses)

That's the first time he asked to go to bed.

I guess it is kind of dated.

- You know, Jughead,

something, something really weird happened this afternoon.

I was with Betty and-

- You found yourself incredibly attracted to her.

- How'd you know?

- Well, it's a typical regression construct.

You'd feel the same way about Veronica,

except she changed more than Betty since high school.

But it's divergent thinking.

It's irrelevant.

The past, Arch.

- (chuckles) Well, we were blissfully ignorant

when we graduated.

- God, I wish we hadn't done that.

- You know, I spent my entire life

trying to do what's right.

You know what I ended up with?

Zilch.

Spent all my time trying to figure out

which woman I really loved and what love really was.

And all I ever got for it were a couple of letters

from Betty and Veronica and then nothing.

Forget it, Jug.

Forget it.

I am finally gonna do what's right for me.

I am gonna get out of this town

and I am gonna do something for myself.

- Wow.

- Uh, well, to me, deep down inside,

you're still the same old Arch.

Something I for one am pretty thankful for.

- (scoffs) But you just said that the past was irrelevant.

You're contradicting yourself.

- Of course I am, I'm a psychiatrist, that's my gig.

Well, I'm sorry our time's up for today.

(Archie sighs)

- Uh-huh.

Yeah.

Yeah.

No, honey.

It's been great seeing everybody.

Yeah, and,

why that little! (gasps)

(playful ominous music)

(card clanging)

(door clicks)

Well, anyway.

- [Pam] Honey, I've been rethinking

the whole silver pattern situation.

And I really want something more

simple, streamlined, classic.

Something more a la Georg Jensen as opposed to the Tiffany.

- Hello, Archie.

- I really- - Gotta call you back.

- [Pam] Honey.

Archie.

- Veronica, I, I can't do this.

- [Veronica] Do what?

- Ronnie, I, I don't think you came by to mend my shirt,

if you know what I mean.

(ladder thuds)

- You think I'm trying to seduce you?

- Well, yeah.

- You do catch on quick.

- [Archie] Ronnie, I have a fiance.

- Don't worry, I've had 13.

- No, no, no, no, no, no.

Okay, all right, look, look, look.

Oh boy, let's, let's say that, that,

that you and I were married.

Now, how would you feel if I, if I did this.

- Wonderful.

I think married couples

should make love as often as possible.

- Waka, waka.

- Hold that thought.

(Jordan yelling) (suspenseful music)

- [Jordan] Max, hold it.

(sultry music)

- Now we're getting somewhere.

(Jordan yelling) (playful music)

(Jordan yelling)

- Whoa, oh!

Max.

Max.

(Jordan yells) (ladder thuds)

(gentle dramatic music)

- Where do you wanna go now?

- Down.

(dog barking)

- You think this is some kind of one night stand for me.

You're wrong.

15 years ago, I was too young and afraid to admit it.

I was in love with you then and I'm in love with you now.

- Ronnie, I don't know what to say.

I'm, I'm really flattered, but I'm still engaged.

- Can she understand you

1/10th of the way we understand each other?

I mean, doesn't that mean anything to you?

Don't I?

- Ronnie, you mean a lot to me, but.

- But?

- Ronnie.

Ronnie.

I'm trying to keep what we had.

I'm not forgetting.

No one ever falls in love like their first time.

But you can't ever be that way again.

Everything has changed.

And even if I wasn't engaged, would it really work?

I mean, how many times have you been married?

- Base 10?

- In base 10.

- Three or so.

- Or so? - Okay, four.

- Okay, see, I don't wanna be number five.

I don't wanna be number anything.

Do you really want to chalk me up as another conquest

or, or do you want me to be

what you'll always be to me, something special.

- Am I really special to you?

- Now and always.

- Archie, I know I come on strong.

It's the way I know how to deal with men.

I guess it's a handicap, but as far as handicaps go,

it's not too bad, right?

- Right.

(gentle upbeat music)

(door bangs)

- What a dork.

(sultry music)

(car door bangs)

(car engine revving)

- Strike three.

I told him once to stay away from her.

Now I need you to be more convincing.

- You don't want him to see her again?

- Never.

- Yes, sir.

(birds chirping)

- Sleep okay?

- Well, apart from the jello in my bed, just fine.

- [Jughead] Jordan.

- No, no, no, no, it's okay.

'Cause when I got the jello off my feet, feet,

I just put it right back in the bowl.

(Max laughing)

- Moving expenses.

40 years, I'm here.

40 years.

You kids come and go, but I've stayed.

- This place means a lot to me, Pops, so do you.

- How much can we mean to you now that you're leaving?

Oh, I'm sorry, Archie.

I didn't mean that.

- Don't apologize, Pops, and don't panic.

Now we'll go through the lease, all the documents.

We'll develop a plan of attack.

I'm gonna be your lawyer, Pops, if you'll have me.

- That's the way it is.

You give the kids everything you can

and when they grow up, they give it back.

(Pop chuckles)

Oh, Archie, the 40 years are worth every second.

- Pops.

(upbeat music)

(ball thuds) (birds chirping)

(group chattering)

(ball thuds)

(playful music)

- I went to see Archie last night.

(whistle blowing)

(balls thudding)

- You decided what you're wearing to the prom yet?

- I've narrowed it down to 16 outfits.

Let's just get it out in the open.

We're both wondering who Archie's gonna ask, right?

- If he asks you, I promise I won't be mad or anything.

- Same here.

As a matter of fact, I really don't care who he asks.

- Really?

- Why should I?

I'm marrying a tall, dark, handsome freshman.

- How romantic.

- We'll live in Paris and,

Archie.

(birds chirping)

(racket thuds)

- Why are you telling me this?

(racket thuds)

- Fair play.

I'm not gonna pursue him anymore.

(racket thuds)

You can do what you like.

- I'm not going to do anything.

(racket thuds)

- It's that simple for you?

(racket thuds)

(glass shattering)

- Of course.

(car horn honking)

(Veronica chuckles)

(hammer thudding)

- I know that Pop's eviction sounds lawful, Judge Brown,

but I'm gonna find a zoning law, anything.

It's a matter of principle.

- I've never seen you so passionate.

You have another side to you, Mr. Andrews.

Makes me wish you were using your talents to a better end.

- Well, Your Honor, I will be,

I'm moving to a big firm in the city.

- Where I'm sure you'll be defending lots of big criminals,

but I still can't open court on a Saturday.

- Your Honor, I'm going to find a way to make you.

A precedent, something.

(wood thudding)

- As I would expect.

(group chattering)

- [Librarian] All right, thank you.

- I have something to say to you as a friend.

What were you doing with Veronica last night?

You're engaged.

- Nothing happened.

- And I'm supposed to believe that.

How do you define nothing?

- Look, she broke into my house and took off her clothes.

That's all. - That's all?

- I swear.

No, no, we didn't, you know?

- No, I don't know.

Are you positive that you didn't?

- [Librarian] Excuse me.

- Yes.

I mean, I think I'd know if we'd, you know.

- Okay.

I'm just making sure that you're being responsible

to your fiance and.

(gentle romantic music)

No, I'm not.

I'm being jealous.

And I feel like a complete fool.

(birds chirping)

(dog barking)

(gentle guitar music)

- Hi, Betty.

- Since I haven't heard,

I assume you're taking Veronica to the prom.

- Oh, well, actually, I decided not to take anybody

so nobody get mad at me.

Didn't work, huh?

- I'm not mad.

But I've decided if you're not serious enough

to take me to the prom

then I shouldn't consider you in my future plans.

I'm gonna go for it, Archie.

Try and be a writer.

There's a great program up north that has a summer session.

I'm leaving Riverdale the day after graduation.

- Why didn't you tell me?

- We'd all assume that we'd go to Riverdale Community

and it'd be just like high school.

I don't want college to be just like high school.

- Yeah, see, I thought-

- That I'd stick around three more years

until you got sick of chasing Veronica.

Don't look so upset, Archie.

I'm just making your choice for you.

- Betty, I don't want you to go.

(gentle brooding music)

- I'm sure you'll learn how to make up your mind one day.

I just can't wait that long.

- You're not a fool.

Ever since we talked about the night of the storm,

I felt regret

that we didn't, you know?

- I felt it too.

What's the matter with us?

- It's just nostalgia.

- You sure?

- Well, it has to be.

I mean we're both in love with other people.

It's just natural to feel this way.

But it's not real.

- Archie.

- Yeah.

- Thank you for helping me figure this out.

I feel much better now.

(Betty panting)

(Archie gasps) (gentle romantic music)

(head thuds)

(group chattering) (birds chirping)

- Hey guys, let's go.

- I think Archie's got women troubles.

- Do they make muzzles for children?

(car door clicks) (car door bangs)

(fart squelching)

Why you. - Archie,

he's just a little boy.

- Yeah, I'm just a little boy.

(ominous music) (crow cawing)

(car engine revving)

(car engine roaring)

- [Archie] We're off.

(handle thuds)

(engine roaring) (tires screeching)

- [Jughead] Oh, oh, gee, Archie, car's running great.

(car horn honking)

- Brakes are off!

- Turn it off, turn it off!

Whoa!

(key clicks)

(group screaming)

(car horn honking)

- Get out of the way!

(tires screeching) (horn honking)

- Oh, oh, oh, oh!

Get down!

(horn honking) (Jughead screaming)

(horn honking)

Watch out!

(fence thudding)

(Jughead grunting)

(trash cans thudding)

(mailbox thuds)

(Jughead yelling)

(tires screeching) (horn honking)

We're gonna die!

(horn honking)

(both screaming)

- Hi, Mr. Wilson.

(wood thudding)

(Archie screaming)

(horn honking)

(tires screeching)

(car horn honking)

(Archie yelling)

(metal thudding)

(tires screeching)

(crates thudding)

(crates thudding)

Whoa!

(table thudding)

Sorry, my fault!

(body thuds)

(glass thuds) (Jughead grunting)

(wood thudding)

(water splashing)

- I say we go back to the market and get some croutons.

Oh!

(car thuds)

(Archie screaming)

(car thuds)

(dramatic music)

(glass shattering)

(Archie and Jughead grunting)

Whoa. - Well, everybody Okay?

(hands clap)

- Hey, hey, my man.

- [Archie] Fun, huh?

(traffic humming) (birds chirping)

(police radio chattering)

(phone ringing)

- Ah, nah, da, da, da,

- Fancy seeing you here, Your Honor.

- I'm here on my weekend, Mr. Andrews to set your bail.

- Thanks, I guess.

There are other ways to stop this eviction

short of ramming your car into buildings.

- Oh no, that was an accident, Your Honor, I swear.

And I'm sorry if I've ruined your weekend.

- I admire your zeal, Mr. Andrews, if not your methods.

I, I don't want this conflict moving into the streets.

- Yes, sir. - Call the parties together.

You've got your hearing.

- Oh, thank you, Your Honor.

(gavel banging)

- This is a municipal hearing.

It's not a trial.

And my verdict is final.

I asked that both parties make their cases brief.

Mr. Mantel.

- It's simple, Your Honor.

Pop Tate's lease is oral.

According to the code I can terminate it at any time.

This is the title.

- Well, now there's a problem here, Mr. Mantle.

You're not the sole owner of the property.

In fact, you're in a minority position to Lodge Industries.

- Hyrum Lodge's written authorization for eviction.

- [Judge Brown] Well, everything seems-

- Miller versus Riverdale 1953.

Miller sued to stop eviction from his residence

claiming landmark status for his house.

Status was granted.

The plaintiff was never evicted.

And the house in question is what we all now fondly know

as Riverdale Highs Field House.

- Gotcha, you snake.

- Order please.

Mr. Tate's store is a commercial property.

And you and I both well know that the landmark statute

clearly does not apply here.

It's a nice try, son.

Well, then I-

- Your Honor, may I make a statement?

Pop Tate's Chocolate Shop

is more than just an ice cream store,

it's a piece of our lives.

Now what kind of a town is Riverdale going to be

if a greedy ego maniac like Reggie

is allowed to kick an old man around?

- Yeah, right.

- I'd like to confirm that, Your Honor.

Reggie is and always has been a greedy ego maniac.

- Yeah, well, you're a space cadet weirdo flake.

- Leave him alone!

- Make me.

- I'll make you.

- Get him Moose. - Oh, come on, Moose,

you're so dumb you wouldn't know

if a brick hits you in the head.

- Well, you have a brick for a heart.

- Honey.

- Oh, what's the matter, Betty?

You upset 'cause nobody's dipped your pigtails

in an ink well lately?

- Hey.

- Order.

You're acting like children.

- If Reggie evicts Pops, well then he,

he might as well just throw our souls away while he's at it.

Your Honor, this courtroom is filled with people

who were raised in and by Riverdale,

who are filled with its values and its spirit.

If I stayed here this long for any one reason,

it's because a place like Pops can still exist.

Places that can't be put on a balance sheet

or, or even into words.

Your Honor, I have no more cases to cite.

No more legal tactics.

But please don't let Reggie kick Pops out.

It'll diminish our town and it'll break our hearts.

(group clapping)

(group chattering)

- Order.

This is the most unconventional case.

It requires further study.

I'll render my verdict tomorrow morning.

- Does that mean we gotta come back here tomorrow?

- Tomorrow morning wake me up at six.

(group chattering)

- Didn't what he said get to you?

- Well, I've seen lawyers preach before.

Frankly, I've seen better.

- You're jealous.

- Well, if I am, it's only natural.

I mean as natural as you coming back here

and thinking all this really matters.

- We'll be back in Midvale in two days

so I'll let this go.

But I want you to promise me

not to insult what I think is important or Archie.

You're my boyfriend,

but he's still important to me.

(Robert sighs)

- You can't do this to Pops.

If mother were here she'd-

- She'd mind her manners.

This is business, Veronica.

I'm very busy at the moment.

Oh, thank you, Smithers.

- You're always busy.

- Veronica, you're my only child and I love you.

You can imagine what my life would've been like

if I had allowed your tantrums to dictate my decisions.

Chaos.

- But Daddy.

- I won't budge on this, Veronica, no matter how

(Veronica screams)

loudly you scream.

You're very angry with now, but you'll get over it.

You always have.

(car engine humming)

(tires screeching)

(door clicks)

(birds chirping)

(door bangs)

(car door creaking)

(car door bangs)

- Donald Trump home?

Whoa.

I'll talk to him.

- He won't listen.

Just get me out of here.

(brooding music)

(car door clicks)

(car door clicks) (door creaks)

(car door bangs)

(car backfires)

- You were supposed to take care of this.

- I tried.

- Try harder.

(gentle music)

(car door creaking)

- I miss this place.

- Yeah.

- I miss how we used to come here

and talk about our problems.

Think about what we'd be like in the the future.

You know, I can't blame my father.

All I've done my whole life is go to clubs, spend his money,

and leave a trail of husbands behind me.

I found my Frenchman Archie,

and all I got for it was my heart broken.

Maybe I deserved it.

You know why I kept getting married?

Same reason people have 10 cats,

they always want a kitten around.

Only kittens become cats

and husbands become jerks after the first anniversary.

- You know, Veronica,

you've always had everything you wanted.

Maybe it's been more of a burden than a blessing.

- Like every other poor little rich girl.

- (sighs) Kiddo, it'll be okay.

Hi, Mr. Lodge.

Uh, Veronica.

- Kathy.

(door clicks)

(door bangs)

- You and I are going to the prom.

- Inviting me the morning before.

No thanks, Archie.

- You're packing.

- I'm off to Paris after graduation.

I'm going to college at the Serban.

- How can you go to France?

- My father's chartering a jet.

- No, no, I, I, I mean, I mean, how can you leave Riverdale?

- It'll be hard to adjust, but it's something I have to do.

Who knows maybe even you'll leave one day.

- I'll never leave.

(train horn honking)

- Look at this stuff.

This is great, isn't it?

This was your dad's place.

- Junkyard.

- It's not just a junkyard, it's our junkyard.

It's full of our ghosts.

- Ghosts.

Right, Dad, ghosts.

- He's a tough nut to crack, Arch.

Toughest I've ever known.

Now you've gotta choose Veronica or Pam.

- Or Betty.

- You've figured everything out with Betty.

- No, I figured everything out for Betty.

It's me, I didn't convince.

- (sighs) How about we throw the three of 'em

in a pit of mud and let 'em fight it out for themselves?

Is that psychoanalysis at work or what?

- Or what?

- It'll still cost you $120.

- Now there's only one choice to make.

I love Pam.

I don't know what I'd do if I lost her.

- Divergent thinking, Arch,

what are you gonna do when you lose Betty and Veronica?

(gentle brooding music)

(Archie sighs)

I know it's cold comfort,

but I always wished I could have been good

with women like you.

(Archie scoffs)

Instead of being afraid of them.

- Jughead, there's nothing to be afraid of.

I mean, the worst they can do is

make your life a living hell.

- Check this out.

Signed by Hank Aaron.

- Where'd you get that?

- Jammed in this old jukebox.

- Oh, let's check it out.

- Wow.

- Where? - This way.

- This is great.

- Hey, Jughead, look at this.

It's the one from the gym, I can't believe it.

- Copies of the school newspaper.

Team uniforms.

An old steering wheel.

This could be from your jalopy.

- Could be.

Oh, hey, when was the last time you saw one of theses?

You know, I should take this as a souvenir.

- Yeah. - Oh, yeah?

Yeah.

- This'd be cool to have.

Look at this.

- Oh, and look.

Boy, they don't make these anymore.

- (laughing) This looks familiar.

(Jughead laughing)

- Man, we had great stuff.

- Ah, we had the best stuff.

- Why would anyone leave all this behind?

- Time makes people kind of blind, I guess.

(birds chirping)

- Hey, hey, what is going on?

- Doing you a favor and putting your things in storage.

That's what's going.

- We're moving in today, you knew that.

- On a Sunday?

- The 10th, Mr. Andrews today.

Looks like you'll have to find yourself a motel.

(upbeat music) (group chattering)

♪ Feel it, girl ♪

♪ You're magic ♪

♪ Now the fine things ♪

- Knew you'd hate it.

- I don't hate it.

It's, it's interesting.

♪ Would be ♪

♪ I just put a twinkle in your eye ♪

Big Ethel.

♪ She coming ♪

- Don't even know what she looks like.

- Watch or cracked mirrors or screaming babies.

- Hi.

- Hmm, let's go over.

♪ I'm taking she said, oh no ♪

♪ My boyfriend's ♪

Jordan.

You're shy with girls just like your father.

- Am not.

- Are too.

- Am not.

- Are.

Listen, I've got a plan.

- Oh no. - Come here.

Come here.

(upbeat rap music)

♪ Yeah, ho ♪

♪ Sugar ♪

♪ Ah, honey, honey ♪

♪ You are my candy girl ♪

♪ And you got me ♪

(Jughead panting)

♪ Sugar ♪

♪ Ah, honey, honey ♪

♪ You are my candy girl, huh ♪

♪ And you got me rocking you ♪

♪ Break it down won't you please ♪

♪ When I kiss you girl ♪

♪ Never knew how sweet a kiss could be ♪

♪ Then you laid your ever loving stuff on me ♪

♪ Break it down for me, fella ♪

♪ I'm gonna make your life so sweet ♪

♪ Rocking, moving, shaking that stuff ♪

♪ I'm gonna rock your world complete ♪

♪ Rocking, moving, grooving ♪

♪ Say what ♪

♪ Pour a little sugar on it ♪

♪ Ah ♪

♪ Sugar ♪

♪ Ah, honey, honey ♪

♪ You are my candy, girl ♪

♪ And you got me rocking you ♪

♪ Break down will you please ♪

♪ Sugar ♪

♪ Ah, honey, honey ♪

♪ You are my candy, girl ♪

♪ And you got me rocking you ♪

♪ Break it down, come on ♪

♪ And you got me, and you got me, and you got me ♪

♪ Break down won't you please ♪

(group clapping)

Now that, uh.

- It was teamwork, Dad.

- Yo, give me five, my man.

- You were fresh, Jughead.

- Oh, you were styling too, my man.

Oh, did you see that move by busted?

- Yeah, I did.

- I was grooving.

Wasn't I grooving? - Yeah.

(gavel banging)

- The case is troubling.

Mr. Mantle's claim clearly carries the greater legal weight.

While Mr. Andrews presents a perspective

I find difficult to ignore.

I'd hope to engineer a compromise.

This proved impossible.

Mr. Andrews,

you presented your case eloquently with honesty and heart.

But unfortunately this court

does not rule on humanity and compassion.

It enforces the letter of the law.

I must allow the eviction to proceed as planned.

(group chattering)

(dog barking) (birds chirping)

- Arch, Arch.

Listen, I'll talk to Lodge about kicking Pops out.

Maybe I can convince him it's bad business.

- After all this why?

- I, I got a confession to make,

when I saw Veronica again my knees locked.

Now listen, talk to her, turn her down, and build me up.

I know you can't make any promises,

but I can't promise I can convince Lodge.

So it's a fair deal see.

- Reggie, has it, it ever occurred to you

that it's wrong to make deals for human beings?

- No.

- Look, Veronica is her own person.

I have absolutely no influence over it.

Now she knows I'm engaged and she knows I'm moving so.

(dog barking)

(Archie gasps)

- Pops is history.

(gentle brooding music)

(door bangs) (bell ringing)

- Let's have none of that.

I'm real proud of you Archie.

No man could have done better.

- Pops. - Don't worry about me.

I just need you to do one thing.

- Anything.

- Go and enjoy yourself.

Now I'm fine.

But if you let my problem spoil your reunion,

I don't know how good I'll be.

Promise.

- What's good for the kids is good for Pops.

- Now get outta here.

(door clicks) (bell ringing)

(upbeat music) (group chattering)

- In honor of our reunion,

management has given us sole run of the park.

And lowered prices to what they were 15 years ago.

Generous I'd say.

- Listen, I've got a good idea.

Let's tie Reggie to the roller coaster tracks

and hand out all you can ride tickets.

(Jordan chuckles)

- You know that woman could be anywhere.

- Oh, face it, Jughead,

sooner or later you're gonna run into Big Ethel.

What are you gonna do then?

(Jughead screaming)

- Ah, are you really scared, Dad?

- No screaming just makes it more fun.

Try it.

(both screaming)

- All contestants for Muppet car polo

join Coach Clayton on the track

for some good clean fun.

(slow tempo suspenseful music)

- Competition builds character.

Whoever gets the most balls in their goal wins.

Okay, sportsmen and sports ladies.

Play ball.

(whistle blowing) (group cheering)

(upbeat music)

(balls thudding)

(tires screeching)

- Oh, oh, that's it.

Come on pal, let's get 'em!

(ball thuds)

Yes!

(Jughead cheering)

- This one's mine.

Yeah!

(broom thuds)

- Betty, take mine.

- Thanks.

- Why did he do that?

- He was being chivalrous.

(tires screech)

Whoo!

(ball thuds)

(balls thudding)

(Archie chuckles)

- Blow him another kiss and he dies.

(balls thudding)

- Hi, Betty.

- I got you Andrew!

(tires screech)

- We're gonna get you!

- [Coach Clayton] Sportsmanship gentlemen, sportsmanship.

- You blew him a kiss.

(balls thudding)

(tires screeching)

I'm gonna get you!

(tires screeching)

- Whoo!

(tires screeching)

(cars thudding)

(car crashing)

(dramatic music)

- [Reggie and Robert] Yeah!

- [Coach Clayton] Stop the game, stop the game!

(Archie groaning)

- Archie.

- Oh.

Wow.

I'm fine. - Help him out.

(Veronica gasping) (Archie groaning)

- Oh, my neck.

Oh.

- [Betty and Veronica] Are you all right?

- Who hit me?

- Reggie.

- And Robert.

- [Archie] Carry me over there.

Let me at 'em.

(Archie groaning)

- [Veronica] No, no, no.

- Hey, hey.

Get outta here.

- Oh, no, Moose, Moose.

No, Moose.

(Archie groaning)

- This hurt? - Yeah.

- This? - Ah, yeah.

Uh-huh, uh-huh.

- Here.

(group gasping)

Hold on.

- No! (screaming)

(Archie groaning)

Oh, huh.

- [Moose] How's that?

- That's- - Better?

- That's, that's pretty good.

Oh, yeah.

- I'll go get your car.

- Okay.

(group cheering) (group clapping)

- [Jordan] Dad, Archie?

- Oh, he's gonna be okay.

Everything's okay.

- Oh, Jughead.

Someone was looking for you.

Eva Mugg said, "That if you two

could just get together on the."

- For a moment there

I thought you might not be able to sing tonight.

- Oh, now Mr. Weatherbee about-

- I'll meet you at your motel.

- Now listen ladies,

you aren't gonna let me down tonight, are you?

- I'll play if Archie does.

- It's a sport, you do whatever you have to do to win.

- You were being a jerk.

- (scoffs) I was a jerk?

Who lost his case?

- What's the matter with you?

Where is the man I came to the reunion with?

- (scoffs) Well, I haven't changed my tune.

- That's right, you haven't.

- And when this ridiculous reunion is over,

it's me you're gonna be left with.

Maybe you better think about that.

- Maybe I'd better.

(Robert sighs)

- Ronnie, it would never work.

I mean, what would you do,

move to the city with me?

No, that's exactly what she'd do.

Ronnie, I made a commitment to Pam and I feel as a man.

(knuckles tapping)

(door clicks)

(upbeat playful music)

- My latest story.

I just finished it.

- I looked up from the dark wet sand

and saw the fire and designs.

I didn't know about my mind, but my body was telling me,

Betty.

- I never forgot the night of the storm, Archie.

And I never forgot the way I stood by

and watched while you chased after Veronica.

How I never just went after what I wanted.

(door clicks)

- What are you doing?

- Something I always want to do with you, Archie.

I'm sick of being Miss Goody Two-Shoes.

Treat me like a woman, Archie.

Make me wild.

- Now let's not be rash.

(car door clicks)

How about that shower?

- How about it?

- Be in in a sec.

(door bangs) (knuckles tapping)

(door clicks)

(upbeat sultry music)

- Archie, you're amazing.

How did you know that was one of my fantasies?

Let's get wet.

- Uh, no!

- No? - No, I was just, uh,

just gonna steam my suit, uh, for the party tonight frankly.

- I'll do it.

- Nope, not gonna wear it just decided.

- Well, let's see what else you've got.

How about?

(door bangs)

- Coming?

- (chuckles) Uh, you bet, uh-huh.

- When?

- Any second now.

- I'll be waving.

- Okay.

(door bangs) (playful music)

Slip fell against the door.

- And you held it closed.

Who are you speaking to?

(knuckles tapping)

Aren't you gonna see who it is?

- Who what is?

(knuckles tapping)

- Someone knocked on the door.

(knuckles tapping)

See. - You're right.

(door bangs)

(door clicks)

- Surprise.

- (gasps) Surprise.

(door bangs)

- (giggles) Are you happy to see me?

- Oh, you bet.

Very happy.

- Uh, are, are we in a rush to get somewhere?

- No, no.

(car engine roaring) (tires screeching)

(door clicks)

(knuckles pounding)

(knuckles pounding)

(Betty screams)

- What are you doing here?

- I was about to ask you the same question.

(Veronica gasps)

(gentle dramatic music)

- I think we need to talk.

- I'm sorry, I know I've been really bad about calling.

But it, it's like, suddenly I have all these best friends.

- I hate you!

- I see.

- Either I'm seeing things or that's babe number three.

- You get this sneaky feeling

that geeky knows something we don't?

- Reggie was trying to force Pops out

and it looked like it was gonna happen

until finally I got the judge

to convene the court over the weekend.

But then I lost.

- I'm sorry.

Can't he move someplace else?

- No, honey, that's not the point.

You see, this place is special.

- It's an ice cream store.

(door bangs)

- Arch, Betty and Veronica are looking for you.

- Uh, honey, this is Jughead and Jordan.

Guys, this is Pam.

- Oh, hi.

- Hi.

- Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you.

- Well, we're going to find Big Ethel.

I decided it'd be a good first step

in conquering my fear of women.

- Wow. - Yeah.

Ah, okay, bye-Bye.

(door clicks) (bell ringing)

(door bangs)

- What a strange pair.

(birds chirping)

(knuckles tapping)

(Jughead sighs)

(door clicks)

- [Jughead] Oh, Ms. Muggs, hi.

Is Ethel home?

- Jughead.

Oh, she'll be so happy to see you.

- Ah.

(Jughead sighs)

(Jughead whistling)

Well, I guess she's not home so.

- [Jordan] Yeah.

(gentle sultry music)

- Ethel?

- Jughead!

Hi.

(upbeat music)

And you must be Jughead Jr.

- That's me, Jughead Jr.

- You're handsome just like your father.

Well, come on.

I was just getting in the jacuzzi.

Come on.

- Jacuzzi, jacuzzi. (grunting)

- Beautiful, right?

But don't tell anyone about this place, it's the gang's.

- Archie, who would I tell?

- Oh, I'm saving

(glass shattering)

that.

- That the bottle, are you kidding?

- Well, they don't make them anymore.

- Honey, if you wanna get attached

to an old root beer bottle, that's fine.

And it's even okay if you wanna think

an ice cream store is the Living In.

But try and keep some perspective.

- Pam, it's not just an ice cream store.

It's our ice cream store.

Mine, and Jughead's, and Betty, and Veronica's,

and Moose's, and yes, even Reggie's.

- Betty and Veronica will be

at the party tonight, won't they?

I'd like to meet them.

- And I'm sure that they'd like to meet you,

but if you don't want to go, that's okay.

I mean, you said,

"You were worried about nodding and smiling."

- I've been practicing.

- Huh?

♪ A clue ♪

♪ Won't you tell me what I should do ♪

♪ And if it's just a lull ♪

♪ Why'm I bored right outta my skull ♪

♪ Oh yeah, yeah, keep me from feeling so dull ♪

♪ If it's just a game ♪

♪ Then we'll break down ♪

- Dad, there's Big Ethel.

- Whoa, quick, quick, hide, hide, hide, hide.

- Arch, remember Big Ethel?

- Hi, Archie.

- Ethel.

- Come on boys, let's dance.

- Ethel's an international model now.

I guess when we knew her,

she was going through an awkward phase.

- Yeah, I guess.

- Archie, we're both in love with you.

- But you have to make a choice.

(Archie chuckling)

- Pam.

This, this, this, this, this is Betty and Veronica.

- I see.

- We're waiting.

- Excuse me, I was here first.

What is going on?

- Time for the band to go on.

You can't disappoint an old man, Andrews.

Especially the one who just saved your neck.

- No, I guess I can't.

- We promised.

♪ 'Cause I'll give you something to live without ♪

♪ You'll give me something to ♪

- I'm giving you a chance to reconsider.

- You're giving me a chance?

- [Mr. Weatherbee] Hold the record please.

Would the rest of the band please assemble on stage.

- What's going on with her?

- The reunion's warping them.

- Small town sentimentality.

I'm sick of it.

- I know what you mean.

- Robert.

- Pam.

(fast tempo drum music)

(group clapping)

- Well, um, hmm, our instruments are old,

we're out of practice, and we're over 30.

(fast tempo drum music)

(group laughing)

So be kind.

- Wait!

Nobody's playing without me.

(medium tempo drum music)

(upbeat music)

♪ Ever since I met 'cha ♪

♪ I couldn't want you better ♪

♪ I couldn't love you stronger if I tried ♪

♪ It's my true heart I'm showin' ♪

♪ Or my nose would be growin' ♪

♪ You know that it gets longer when I lie ♪

♪ It's been a long time ♪

♪ La-la-la-la-la ♪

♪ Yeah, come on ♪

♪ La-la-la-la-la ♪

♪ Look at the pipes on her ♪

♪ La-la-la-la-la ♪

♪ The band's still got it ♪

♪ La-la-la-la-la ♪

♪ Oh yeah, here we go ♪

♪ Bein' kinda pretty and down here in the city ♪

♪ Find it isn't easy to be smart ♪

♪ Tell me, Jug ♪

♪ Tryin' to untangle the jingle from the jangle ♪

♪ It's easy to listen to your heart ♪

♪ La-la-la-la ♪

♪ Yeah, oh ♪

♪ La-la-la-la-la ♪

♪ One time everybody ♪

♪ La-la-la-la ♪

♪ Now we're cooking now, yeah, come on ♪

♪ La-la-la-la-la ♪

♪ You want the hits, give me baby ♪

♪ La-la-la ♪

(microphone screeching)

- Hold, hold, hold, please.

Pop Tate won't move.

The bulldozers are gonna drive right over.

(Betty gasps)

(guitar thuds)

(ominous music)

(group chattering)

- Hey, there he is.

- You gotta help Pops.

- Yeah, yeah.

- They're gonna doze right over him.

It's gonna be a bloody mess.

- And we'll lose our jobs.

- Don't worry I'll take care of him.

- Go get him.

- What are you doing?

- My laundry.

What does it look like I'm doing, Archie?

- Reggie, you are a poor sportsman.

- A gift, sir, from Ms. Lodge.

- Yeah, right, thanks.

Pops, this is not gonna accomplish anything.

Oh, Pops, now look.

(car doors banging)

No, no, no.

You'll have to arrest me too.

- And me too. - Yeah, Jughead.

Yeah, folks come on.

- Come on, Betty, you're coming with me.

- Don't touch me.

- Don't touch you, I'm your boy-

- You're a bully, and I'm sick of being pushed around.

Go and pick on somebody your own size.

We're through.

- In case you haven't noticed, demonstrations are out.

I demand you stop this right now.

- I can't do that.

- Archie, you're pushing me.

I've put up with a lot from you today.

(police radio chattering)

- [Man] What are you gonna break our heads now?

- [Man 2] We're not leaving!

- [Woman] Come on, the can't arrest all-

- This is my business, Veronica.

- [Woman 2] What do you think you're gonna do?

- Remember, you need me as much as I need you.

- I don't need this.

Disown me.

I'll wait tables before I take another cent

from a heartless monster.

- Yeah! - I've given you everything.

- Everything money could buy.

All you did was throw gifts, and I took them,

and I hated myself for it.

- [Man 3] You got a cell big enough

to hold the whole town?

- I had no idea you felt so strongly.

- Make your choice, Father, me or your money.

- [Hyrum] Call off the crew.

(group cheering) (group clapping)

(insects chirping)

- Done, sir.

- Done?

- Your problem's almost eliminated.

- You were supposed to frighten Archie, not eliminating him.

- Well, it's only a bomb.

- There are hundreds of people out there!

- No problem, sir.

It has to be triggered by this.

- Give that to me.

- I don't know if I want to.

(group cheering)

- Ah, ha, ha, yeah!

Pop's here for good.

- The package!

- Yeah, yeah, thanks Veronica.

It's very nice.

- It's a bomb.

- It's a bomb?

A bomb, a bomb!

- A bomb!

- A bomb!

It's a bomb!

(group screaming)

- A bomb?

- This way! - That way!

- [Archie] A bomb, a bomb, a bomb!

- [Cop] A what?

A bomb? - A bomb!

- [Cop] That's a bomb.

(Archie yelling)

- That's a bomb!

- That's a bomb!

(Archie panting)

- Isn't winning enough?

- Can't you just shut up for once?

- You have to humiliate me more.

You made this whole thing up.

There isn't any

(bomb exploding)

bomb.

(metal thudding) (siren wailing)

(birds chirping)

- Pam, listen.

- You don't have to say it.

After all this, I don't wanna be with you anymore

than it seems you wanna be with me.

- Listen, I'm really sorry about all this.

I didn't mean to hurt you.

I certainly didn't plan any of this.

I mean, if I had the last three days to do all over again,

I, I'd do exactly the same thing.

It's not nostalgia or, or, or any of those things.

It's, it's real.

(trunk thuds)

I know it sounds really weird, but after all this,

after everything that's happened,

I feel a lot clearer about things.

- It's okay, Archie.

- Really?

- Ready to go?

- Robert and I have a lot in common.

(Archie chuckles)

(gentle music)

- You sure you got everything?

I feel like we- - I hope I.

- Hey. - Hey.

- I was. - Talk to Pam?

- Yeah, get that piano off your back yet?

- I'm all alone now.

- We've gotta go.

- Oh sure.

It was great seeing you guys.

- Hey, you're not alone, you've got us.

We'll visit.

- Yeah, this place is cool.

- He liked the explosion.

(door clicks)

(door bangs)

- Good job, there geek.

Uh, Archie.

Would you shake our hands?

- We even washed them.

(Archie chuckles)

- Thanks. - Thanks, Arch.

- You bet.

- See you tomorrow, Pops.

- Hey Pops, don't forget the back door's still open.

(door clicks) (bell rings)

- [Pop] Archie, uh, how about a molt for old time's sake?

- [Archie] Set 'em up, Pops and keep 'em coming.

- We're still waiting.

- Choose, Archie.

- We're making it as easy as possible for you.

No matter what you decide.

We won't be mad at you or each other,

but we need to know.

- Well.

(water splashing) (Archie groans)

- Ah, Jordan.

- Sorry, Archie.

- No problem.

Get over here.

Come here, get over here.

- You know, I was thinking on the bus,

you know how many shrinks there are in the city?

Thousands.

There's barely enough lunatic to go around,

and Jordan couldn't bear to live far away

from his Uncle Archie.

I had a little to say in.

- So hmm, what are you two gonna do?

- I'm staying here this summer to write.

My publisher says, "I have a real future

as a romance novelist."

And in the fall we'll see if Riverdale

needs another grade school teacher.

- Paris is jammed with tourists this time of year

and Daddy and I have a few things to work on.

When are you leaving?

- Uh, oh, I'm not.

- But Pam?

- Is back in the city.

We broke up.

- Yes, yes, yes.

- Well, have a seat.

- Okay, everybody smile.

- [Archie] Get in here.

Look pretty.

(Reggie clears throat)

(door bangs)

- Sorry.

- Little louder, Reg.

- I think everyone heard.

Come on, Reggie.

Okay, nobody move.

- I don't think anybody will.

(camera clicks)

(camera clicks)

(upbeat music)

(gentle upbeat music)

(graphic whooshing)

(graphic chimes)

(upbeat music)

- [Boy] DIC.