Original subtitles

Hey, Harry. Still got the bee problem?

Yeah, among others.

Well, I've got the answer.

This little baby oughta knock 'em out.

What is it? A spray gun?

Better. Look.

See those bees over there in your peach tree?

[Ralph] I'll demonstrate, then we'll go inside

and mop 'em up. Okay?

Anything to get rid of bumbly bumbles.

I got this little doozy

from a buddy of mine in war surplus.

War surplus? I hope that isn't a...

[flamethrower whooshing]

...flamethrower.

[Ralph] Did the job, didn't it?

[branch snaps]

[theme music]

♪ I love my mom and dad and my brothers too ♪

♪ And with groovy way we get along ♪

♪ But every time the slightest little thing goes wrong ♪

♪ Mom starts to sing This familiar song ♪

♪ Wait till your father gets ♪

♪ Until your father gets ♪

♪ Wait till your father gets home ♪

♪ Dad's not so bad and he seldom gets mad ♪

♪ And we aren't about to desert him ♪

♪ Kids today like to have their own way ♪

♪ And what daddy doesn't know won't hurt him ♪

♪ I think my mom's just swell but she starts to yell ♪

♪ Every time we have a fuss ♪

♪ Just wait till your father gets ♪

♪ Until your father gets ♪

♪ Wait till your father gets home ♪

♪ You see what I mean? ♪

♪ Wait till your father gets home ♪

♪ We know ♪♪

[tapping]

"One medium-well, one medium-rare

"one medium-medium"

Medium-medium?

Who ordered their steak medium-medium?

I did, dear.

[Harry] What's medium-medium?

It's somewhere between medium-well, medium-rare

and medium-pink.

She'll get medium and like it.

[bee buzzing]

Swish

[Harry] Ow!

[Julius snickers]

[bee buzzing]

Harry, there's a bee in the kitchen.

I just got stung by one out here.

[Irma] Well, come get 'em out.

With this lump I couldn't fit through the door.

Ooh! I can see the little stinger.

Little stinger? That's an Apache arrow.

[bee buzzing]

Pop, listen to my guitar.

Oh, there's sympathy for you.

I'm impelled with a poison dart

and my son wants to make it into a musical.

I meant, listen to the bees inside.

Can you hear 'em buzzing?

Oh, yeah. It's almost a melody.

[bee buzzing]

The whole house is full of bees. Somebody do something.

[Julius growling]

[Alice] They've all that great big stingers.

screech

[bee buzzing]

Everybody, relax. I'll get my spray gun out of the garage.

You can't destroy them. Bees help things grow.

So I notice.

They're part of the ecology, pop.

We've got to protect them.

I'm part of the ecology too.

Now, what about protecting me?

[Julius barking]

And Julius too.

Now, look. They started this.

So when they make with the acupuncture

I make with the spritzy.

But papa...

And because of them our steaks are ruined.

Jamie, maybe, you can convince papa.

Not me. I don't argue against $4 a pound.

Why don't we call in an expert and all agree to go along

with whatever he says, okay?

That's okay by us.

Well, then I guess it's okay by the ogre too.

Bees? Bees? Bees? Oh, here, here.

This guy sounds like he knows what he's doing.

"Charlie Bumbles Johnson. If you got bees, give me a buzz"

You'll see, he'll insist on saving them.

He's a pro. He'll wipe 'em out just like I was going to.

The only difference is, he'll get paid for it.

Uh, h-hello, Mr. Johnson? My name is Boyle.

[tires screech]

[crash]

I thought I heard something hit my car.

You did. Lucky thing too.

- Lucky? - My breaks ain't too good.

I could have run right through your garage.

Charlie Bumbles Johnson.

- Mr. Johnson, we've got a... - Shh!

[bees buzzing]

Over here. They're here. They're right here.

Oh, you've got bees. You've got lots of bees.

You can go in the bee-keeping, if you wanted to.

I don't want to.

This is gonna be a pretty big job.

I better check in with headquarter.

[bees buzzing]

A radio?

Uh, you'll have to hold it down. I'm about ready to transmit.

[blows air]

Bumble one to Bumble base.

Bumble one to Bumble base. Over.

[garbled voice on radio]

That's affirmative, Bumble base.

I'm on station, have contacted involved party.

They've got a 307 positive, alright.

[garbled voice on radio]

Miss Stella, check's in the mail.

Over and out.

[glass shatters]

Can we get to the bees now?

Mr. Boyle, one thing you gotta keep in mind.

You can't rush a bee.

Alright, but can I rush you?

No problem I'll be out of here in 90 minutes.

You can relax. I know exactly what I'm doing.

[quirky music]

Uh, that's the house.

[sniffs]

Oh they're here. They're here.

[sniffs]

[Charlie] They're all around us.

You can smell a bee?

You can tell a bee, man by its nostrils.

Wanna see a real bee-nose? Look up in there.

I'll take your word for it.

Now look, we think the bees are in the chimney.

[laughs] Curtain time. Little humor there.

[clears throat]

Aren't you afraid of getting stung?

Afraid? Son when you're in bees you learn to leave fear behind.

[bees buzzing]

T-they're in there. They're in there, alright.

A major swarm of genus bombadii.

To the late, on bumble bees.

So now you're gonna spray them, right?

[gasps] No, no, no. Oh, no, we don't do that.

You see, papa? You see?

Your bee is nature's little helper.

Without the bee the New Zealand sheep industry would disappear.

Because no one would be left to pollinate the red clover.

I didn't know that. Let me write that down.

You-you got a pencil?

Saw the bee truck outside. What's goin' on?

- You got bees? - Not bees.

We've got nature's little helpers.

And they've been helping themselves to me.

[Ralph] Why didn't you send for me?

This is gonna cost you X number of dollars.

And from the looks of this bird it's gonna be a very big X.

I'd have gotten in there with a dime's worth of kerosene

and gotten rid of them for ya.

[hissing]

Now, see here, whatever your name is.

You think, any old bum can come in

off the street and be a bee-man?

Watch it with the bum, fella. You heard him, Harry.

Ralph, please, I'm paying this guy by the hour.

Okay, pal, but if you find out you got super bees, call me.

[Charlie] Super bees?

Yup. It's been in all the papers.

The commies are breeding 'em in South America

and driving 'em north against us.

Why?

Well, they're gonna try to

sting us into socialism.

[quirky music]

If you kill any of them I'll run away to a beach

and go swimming in the nude.

We're not gonna kill 'em. This is just a smudge pie.

When Mr. Johnson yells down

I'll light it here in the fireplace.

It'll hurt their little eyes.

Hurt their eyes? What are they? Proofreaders?

You ready down there?

[Harry] All set.

Okay, light her up.

[match strikes]

Did you light it?

I think so.

Give me confirmation on the lighting.

Take a good look in the fireplace.

Double check it!

Okay.

[fire crackling]

Kaboom

Good work, Boyle. You got a nice touch.

Done and done again.

Another blue ribbon success for the Old Bumbles Johnson org.

Well let me pay and you could be on your way.

Alright, let's see.

17.50 an hour for the two personnel--

What two personnel?

The radio operator on the other end.

But that's your wife.

Just after hours.

Otherwise, she's Bumble base, and she's union.

Ah, just give me the total.

I-I've got other things to...

[bees buzzing]

They're still here.

Just workers. Just workers!

I gave 'em a touch of smoke.

They won't hang around because there aren't

any more unfertilized females.

Ha ha. I mean, would you?

Please, just finish up.

[squeaking]

[hissing]

But my roast beef's in there.

- He he. You know something? - What?

When you're angry, your eyes are like two balls of fire.

Oh, really?

Just like Ann Sheridan.

[Irma] You mean, ha ha ha. I look like Ann Sheridan?

- Very much around your eyes. - Oh.

[both laughing]

Oh.

Well, uh...

I was working in Vegas. They-they had bees backstage.

Show girls were panicking.

[Charlie] Well, that figures, when there's nothing

between you and big bumbler

but a little bikini.

Are you finished?

Yep, it's a wrap.

Well, here's your check and I'll say goodbye.

Right. Bye, Mr. Boyle. Bye, Annie.

[laughs]

Finally.

He's kind of nice.

He's kind of crackers.

I'm glad it's over.

[door opens]

- Shhh. - What now?

Shh.

What is it? Another bee?

Not just a bee.

What we have here is an unfertilized female.

So catch it.

It's not that easy. They're tricky.

I mean, they bring the boys in and then...

Are the children around? Well, one thing leads to another

and the next thing you know you got your

larvae all over the place.

Then you got your molts, you have pupates

and you're adults again, huh.

[Charlie] This calls for a face line all-out offensive.

I get it. Another hour, another 17.50.

No no, we don't handle the phase nine on an hourly basis.

This is a bee-alert.

I'm movin' here with you. Full time.

Full time?

Molts, pupates, adults.

♪♪

[snoring]

He's been working so hard. I feel sorry for him.

Feel sorry for the bee.

If she's still in the house

she's got have punctured eardrums.

[muffled snoring]

Harry, you're not supposed to wake him.

He made it quite clear.

His hours are 8:00 to 5:00 and it's only 7:30.

Oh, I've gotta blow the whistle on all this.

He's been here for three days now and--

Shh. You'll wake him.

What would you like for breakfast?

Make mine two double eggs and over easy edges

brown bacon crisp, brown ground, whole wheat toast

trim the edges and just a touch of mocha mix in the coffee.

Great! Our sleeping exterminator is also a galloping gourmet.

Did I do everything right?

Almost, the oats are just a shade too firm.

Mine are like pot holders.

Why don't you worry about my eggs?

Charlie is company.

[Harry] He's not. He's just a hired guy.

Papa, he is not.

Now, my wife, she's a great cook.

[Charlie] When it comes to egg, she's got a real green palm.

You mean, Bumbles base?

Her real name's Marilyn. We met at the big insect dance.

I didn't know big insects could dance.

No, it wasn't the insects dancing.

It was, ah, I get a little joke, uh?

[laughs]

You know, I love a guy with a sense of humor.

[coughs]

Seriously, though it was for people

who work at the insect game.

At that time, Marilyn was receptionist

for a roach man, a La Cucaracha Baker.

Now, she came with the fella from Glendale

who is in silverfish, but he had to leave

for an emergency infestation.

Yeah, we hit it right off.

I held her hand in the dark while Chopper Steven

showed us termite slides.

How romantic.

Can I have another sweet roll?

Honey, what about your diet?

Oh, let her have another. That's just baby fat.

Gee! Thanks, Mr. Johnson.

Anytime.

Look, Alice. Mr. Johnson is not

your father and I happen to--

Harry? Harry? Kid.

You're only widening your generation gap.

Better leave these sort of things to me.

I better get going.

- Have you got your milk money? - Yep.

Don't forget your clarinet.

You have orchestra today.

Yes, Mr. Johnson.

Oh, and Chet. Fix your motor cycle.

[Charlie] It's dripping oil on the driveway.

Right on.

Alice, you have the dentist

at 4 o'clock and remember to get a present

for Kelly Matthews' birthday.

Will do, Mr. Johnson.

[closes door]

Bumbles, I hate to interrupt.

You should change that tie, you know.

You wore it yesterday.

When are you gonna finish up here?

Harry, you're bee-rushing me again.

Now, just relax. I'll get her.

I've never known a female yet

I couldn't attract sooner or later.

[squeaking]

[quirky music]

Hey, Harry, you still got the bee problem?

Yeah, among others.

Well, I've got the answer.

This little baby oughta knock 'em out.

- What is it? A spray gun? - Better. Look.

See those bees over there on your peach tree?

[Ralph] I'll demonstrate, then we'll go inside

and mop 'em up. Okay?

Anything to get rid of bumbly Bumbles.

I got this little doozy

from a buddy of mine in war surplus.

War surplus? I hope that isn't a...

[flamethrower whooshing]

...flame thrower.

[branch creaks]

[Ralph] Did the job, didn't it?

Want another sample?

Sure.

Turn it on again.

Charles, could you see if these drapes are even?

A big pleasure, madame.

[Irma laughs]

Well?

You're a little low on your side.

Is that better?

Well, just one thing, you know.

Those dark drapes! They're just not you.

Th-this room just screams for an off white rosette.

Eh, you mean, buy all new drapes?

I saw the combination while I was doing

a swarm of hornets for Clu Gulager.

Really? You worked at Clu Gulager's house?

Oh, what's he like? Is he nice?

Loved him. Hated the hornets.

[Irma laughs] Charlie!

[both laugh]

Yeah, I mingled with a lot of show folk

your Oscar and Emmy luminaries and such.

Had my name in a column once.

Bumbles Johnsons sprayer for the stars.

[Irma laughs]

If I tell you something, uh, promise to keep as a secret?

Oh, I promise.

Cross your heart, and hope to dye?

[Irma] I do.

Mickey Rooney has termites.

Good heavens! Does he know?

He does now.

I sat him down. Just talked to him straight.

Do you do termites?

No, strictly bees and the odd yellow jacket.

No killing. I was raised a Quaker.

How sweet.

You are gonna buy the new drapes.

They're so expensive. I don't think Harry--

The question is, to be or not to be?

Irmy, you only go around once in life.

You gotta grab all the gusto, you can!

I'll buy them.

Hey, I think I hear our unfertilized female.

Oh, that's just the refrigerator humming.

It always does that.

Sounds like a loose whatchamacallit on the hoodses.

I'll get my tools off the truck and have a little look-see.

[Irma] Would you?

Yeah, and while I'm out I'll also check that

leaky sprinklers and tighten up those furnace pipes.

My! You can do just about everything, can't you?

Well, I wouldn't say everything.

[Charlie] My real specialty is things electronical.

I once replaced all the circuits

in the old Brynner's hair dryer.

But I thought he was bald.

Can you handle another little inside item?

What?

The bald head of Mr. Y, it's a wig.

[comical music]

Thanks for the ride, pop. What's wrong?

The bee truck. It's gone!

[Chet] Hey, yeah.

And that means, the bees' gone.

Which means that he's gone.

Life might even be beautiful again.

- Watch it, fella. - I thought, you were Irma.

Yeah? Okay, I'll buy that for now.

But just cool it, alright?

But, you did look like Irma from behind.

Watch again there, buddy.

I mean, that's her gardening hat.

Well, I borrowed it. I was working outside

on your sprinklers.

[Charlie] Must have misplaced a few parts.

You better get a plumber in here.

A plumber? Look, where is my wife?

Oh, she took my truck and drove into town

to buy some new drapes.

I'm baking some penuche.

There's nothing to nosh on around here.

Oh, which reminds me, better get somebody in here

to fix your refrigerator too.

What's wrong with that?

Take a look. Your whatchamacallit's shot.

At least, I don't think it's working.

Hard to tell because I can't get it back in.

- What have you done to it? - Maybe it just needs oiling.

Oiling?

But the furnace, now that's something different.

The furnace? Just tell me, did you get the bee?

With all the things I was doing for you?

[Charlie] I only have two hands.

I suppose that's something to be grateful for.

[bee buzzing]

Hey, listen. It's the bee. Do you hear that humming?

That's just your refrigerator motor coming on.

[bee buzzing]

It is the bee.

- There's where she went. - In the piano?

Yeah, I should have known. Bees love music.

I'll take the front off to get at her.

Hand me the, uh, socket wrench.

Do we have to whisper?

Bees don't know from socket wrenches.

Those little buzzers know a lot more

than we give 'em credit for.

[creaking]

Aw, do you have to take the pedals off?

Bumbles is the name, there's my game.

The keyboard too?

That's a 88 pure hiding places

Oh at least we can be glad it isn't a pipe organ.

She's in there on the strings. Give me a hand.

We'll take that right outside.

This finishes it, right?

Done and done again.

[Charlie] Oh, look out for the thing-a-bob.

- The what? - The skateboard.

crash

Now why'd you have to do that for?

She flew off and went back in the house.

This whole thing is totally out of hand.

The time has come to give Mr. Bumbles the boot.

At least you can wait till morning.

He's down there relaxing.

'Watching "The Werewolf Meets Wolfman"

on the Late Movie.'

Okay, but at the crack of dawn

that bee-man buzzes out of here.

[snoring]

- Uh, hey there. - What're you doing up here?

Well that, uh, that werewolf movie was a little scary

and I, um, I thought you wouldn't mind if I, uh...

Oh, hello, Charlie. Is it time for breakfast?

He got so scared by the movie

so he came up to sleep in our bed.

Well, there's another pillow in the closet.

Since you're here, I might as well tell you--

Shh.

[bee buzzing]

I hear her. But she's humming

a little higher now.

You know what that means?

Your unfertilized bee

is now a fertilized bee.

Well don't look at me.

I couldn't hang around all day

and chaperone her.

She's in the attic. I got her now!

Oh, he better be right.

What's going on?

Mr. Johnson has located our bee in the attic.

[Charlie] I see her. I got her trapped.

I knew he would.

You owe him an apology, dear.

I'm just glad it's over and no more harm done.

[crashing]

Well, it's a happy ending, folks. I always get my bee.

[cracking]

The carpenters say they can come Tuesday.

I hope you're not still angry.

At least it got rid of old Charlie.

[car honking]

Hi, folks. I got to thinking how your ceiling fell in.

You know, you might need a good termite man here.

Now hold on...

Now this is gonna disappoint you

but I simply don't do termites.

Aw... good.

- Never have, never will. - Great!

Wouldn't take on a termite job for love or money.

Fine, then we won't offer you one either, huh.

But you folks been so good to me, I found you one.

- My nephew Jimmy. - Hello, Mr. Boyle

Bumbles two to Bumble base. I'm on a four-three.

May have to stay over a few days. Over and out.

[theme music]