All language subtitles for Wait.Till.Your.Father.Gets.Home.S01E19.Sweet.Sixteen.1080p.BluRay.FLAC2.0.H.264-BTN_track5_[eng]

And to think I bought
this for a pleasure car.

Has your sister got her
learner's permit?

Yeah. I guess they give 'em to anybody.

It's an attack!

To arms, to arms.
The Russians are coming.

- Which way did they go?
- That way.

Whittaker, those are my
next door neighbors.

- Let's grab 'em.
- No, Whittaker. Stop.

Thud

Why, commander, this is so sudden.

Whittaker, you're a menace.

You bent my whistle.

♪ I love my mom and dad
and my brothers too ♪

♪ And with groovy way
we get along ♪

♪ Every time the slightest
little thing goes wrong ♪

♪ Mom starts to sing
this familiar song ♪

♪ Wait till your father gets
until your father gets ♪

♪ Wait till your father
gets home ♪

♪ Dad's not so bad
and he seldom gets mad ♪

♪ And we aren't about
to desert him ♪

♪ Kids today like to
have their own way ♪

♪ And what daddy doesn't know
won't hurt him ♪

♪ I think my mom's just swell ♪

♪ But she starts to yell ♪

♪ Every time we have a fight ♪

♪ Just wait 'til
your father gets ♪

♪ Until your father gets ♪

♪ Wait 'til your father
gets home ♪

♪ See what I mean ♪

♪ Wait till your father
gets home ♪

♪ We know ♪♪

Attention, Boyle family.
Front and center.

The master has an important
announcement to make.

You will all observe
what I hold in my hand.

What is it, pop?

This, my son, is called a check.

It's a way of exchanging money.

Something you wouldn't know about

since you've never earned any.

What's so important about a check?

What's so important?

It only happens to be the last payment

of our 20 years' mortgage.

Oh, Harry.

I didn't realize today was the day.

Yup, Irma. We no longer share
this house with the bank.

It belongs to just us and the termites.

No more of those back-breaking
monthly payments.

Hey, now you'll be able
to raise my allowance.

I knew we could count on him.

I wouldn't know what to
do with the extra money

and he solved my problem.

You're not getting any
extra benefits either.

You're eating like a
Saint Bernard already.

Well, I'm going to the bank
and bid the loan department

a happy goodbye forever.

- Can I drive you, papa?
- No, thanks.

I was sort of hoping to
arrive there in one piece.

Typical male chauvinist attitude.

You think I'm a bad driver
just because I'm a woman.

No. I think you're a bad driver
because you're a bad driver.

Harry, she needs all the
practice she can get.

She's gonna be 16 soon and
taking her driving test.

Okay, okay.

Oh, thanks. I'll go get
my learner's permit.

Wanna borrow my crash helmet, pops?

No. I'll just rely on prayer.

Bye, dear. And be patient with Alice.

By the way, my will's in the
bottom drawer of my desk.

- What are you making?
- Dragon's teeth.

We need road blocks to stop
any Ruski tank attacks.

Russian tanks have been
spotted in the neighborhood?

Look, Harry. I got the facts.

You know them Ruski ballet dancers

that's splitting around the country?

Yeah.

Well, what they're actually here for

is to smuggle in tank parts.

Where do they hide these parts, Ralph?

In their tights?

Well, the fat ones do.

For people loaded down with tank parts

how do you explain their being
so light on their feet?

It's the ball bearings.

Ralph, I think you're ready
for a brain transplant.

[Alice] I'm ready, daddy.

Okay. Pull the car out of the garage.

Crash

Reverse is the one marked R.

[Alice] Thanks, papa.

Did I back up alright?

You're ready for the Indianapolis 500.

All clear behind.

Here we go.

Crash

Easy, Alice. Will you try
and keep in your own lane?

It's traditional.

Please, papa.
You're making me nervous.

What do you think I am?

I feel safer walking on the freeway.

There. How is that for parking, papa?

Not bad. It's only a
short walk to the curb.

Here you are, Mr. Boyle.
Your mortgage paid in full.

Ah, it was a tough fight, but I won.

Yes. Now, how much do you wanna borrow?

Oh, thanks.
No more borrowing.

I wanna stay free and clear.

Do I understand you correctly?

You intend to go through
the rest of your life

not owing money?

That's the general idea.

But it's un-American.

The greatness of this country
was built on people

going into debt over their head.

Owing money is our way of life.

Sorry, all I know is I'm
a happy man today.

Goodbye, Mr. Hastings.

See if you get a calendar
from us this Christmas.

Is that so?

I had no idea Alice is going to be 16.

Yes. Heh. Time really flies.

We had a fabulous sweet 16
party for our Dorothea.

- Catered, of course.
- Oh?

We covered the pool, and
had this gigantic tent.

The flowers, the food, the music.

It was exquisite.

Must've had over a 100 guests.

How many do you plan, dear?

Well... we haven't
finished the list yet.

The party was shamefully expensive.

But my husband was so understanding.

I'm sure your Harry will be too.

Harry? Of course.

I'll just show him the bills,
and he'll accept them

as graciously as he always does.

Uh, oh.

I'll call my caterer Winston.

You simply got to use him.
He is the best.

- Oh, well I don't know.
- He may not be available.

And to think I bought
this for a pleasure car.

Has your sister got her
learner's permit?

Yeah. I guess they give 'em to anybody.

It's an attack.

To arms, to arms.
The Russians are coming.

Mayday, mayday.
Red alert.

Commie attack.

- Which way did they go?
- That way.

Whittaker, those are my
next door neighbors.

The Reds have infiltrated
that close, eh?

Well, let's grab 'em.

No, Whittaker. Stop.

Thud

Why, commander, this is so sudden.

if you wanna smooch

why don't we just drive
up to the duck pond?

Whittaker, you're a menace.

You bent my whistle.

Hi, honey.
Uh, where's Alice?

Out nailing the garage back together.

You know, dear, it seems
like only yesterday

she was just a little girl.

It's hard to believe
she's going to be 16.

What's hard to believe?

In just a half hours
drive, I aged ten years.

[Irma chuckles] U-uh, what
I mean, Harry is that

it's a very important
birthday to a girl.

And I think we oughta have a party.

Sure. Birthday cake, lots of ice cream.

Play Pin The Tail On The Donkey.

Pin The Tail On The Donkey?

Harry, she's grown up now.

Okay. We'll get an older donkey.

Are you relaxed, dear?

Mmm. What a touch.

I couldn't enjoy it more

if you were 20 years
younger and Swedish.

- Honey.
- Yeah?

About Alice's party.
It is a special occasion.

And I think we oughta
have something nice.

I couldn't agree more.

We'll throw in some fruit
punch with the ice cream.

What I actually had in mind
was... a catered affair.

Catered affair?

All of a sudden, I'm
not relaxed anymore.

Harry, a girl is only sweet 16 once.

She was only born once, but
we didn't have that catered.

Harry, look what I found.

[Harry gargling] What?

You just got to see these
pictures of Alice.

They're just precious.

- Here?
- Uh, look at this one.

And this is when she had
her third birthday party.

Remember?

And will you ever forget this one?

Her first pony ride.

She was cute.

Yeah. She was cute.

- Then, Harry--
- No, no.

Your sneaky trip down memory
lane isn't gonna work.

No caterer.

Harry.

No.

But he's gonna be here tomorrow.

- Who?
- Winston.

Oh.

Winston? What's a Winston?

The caterer. Mrs. Pairie
made the appointment.

Then let Mrs. Pairie see him.

Harry, he's coming and it won't
hurt to just talk to him.

Okay, okay, I'll talk to Winston.

Thanks, dear.

Oh, no.

- Hello.
- Harry, everything okay there?

Of course everything's okay.
Why?

You sure you're not in trouble?

What are you talking about?

Saw your lights flashing on and off.

I figured the Commies overpowered you

and they're signaling their subs at sea.

Go to bed, Ralph.

Hi there.
I'm Winston.

Oh. Please come in.

Oh, you must be the sweet 16 girl.

Heavens, no.
I'm the mother.

Really? I never would've dreamed.

- Uh, this is my daughter.
- How do you do?

Ah. isn't she lovely?

A bud blossoming into womanhood.

We must give her a party
befitting her grace and beauty.

- Harry, the caterer is here.
- Coming.

Please be patient with my husband.

He's not completely sold on
the idea of a catered party.

Oh, don't worry. I get along
very well with fellas.

Ah, the father.

- How do you do?
- Hi.

Uh, look. I've been thinking.

Alice is my only daughter
and she should have

a great party, so... well, I'm
willing to go along with this.

- Oh, thank you, daddy.
- That's wonderful, Harry.

You've made the right
decision, Mr. Boyle.

Yup. I've decided to go all out.

I'm gonna give you a $150
to work with. Sway.

Thud

Well, if a 150 isn't enough

I-I'm willing to go a little higher.

But I don't want this party
to get out of line.

Oh, have no fear, Mr. Boyle.
I'm very aware of costs.

And we'll cut corners wherever we can.

[Winston] Oh, the setting is perfect.

We can turn this into a
veritable tropical garden.

African violets, birds of paradise

and orchids everywhere.

Wait. We need a theme for the party.

Ah! I've got it.
The Roman era.

- Roman?
- Sure.

With your daughter's
divine statuesque figure

she'd make a perfect Venus.
Goddess of love.

Ooh, I love the idea.

And you my dear, would make
an exquisite Minerva.

Goddess of wisdom.

And I'm gonna make a
wonderful Pete the Tramp.

God of the paupers.

I see it all now.

We recreate an authentic Roman garden.

A small reflecting pond

covered with floating lotus blossoms.

Roman garden?

How much is this gonna cost?

Not to worry, Mr. Boyle.
Not to worry.

There'll be flaming torches all over.

The dance floor here

the buffet table will
go right over there

and the orchestra stands over
there for the two bands.

- Two bands?
- Oh, it's a must.

A rock group for the young people

and a dance band for the adults.

Oh, naturally.
And while we're at it

why not a revolving band stand?

Now, Mr. Boyle.

Remember, we're cutting corners.

Some corners he's cutting.
So far, we're up to $800.

Cocktail Franks and meatballs
aren't good enough for him.

No. He has to have imported
Australian lobster tail chunks

a-and caviar. Now that comes
to 50 cents an hors d'oeuvre

and it doesn't even
include the toothpick.

Harry, if you wanna check
the invitation list

and see if we've left anybody out?

Is this a guest list, or the latest

United States census?

Well, Alice has a lot of
friends and so do we.

We can't hurt anybody's feelings.

At 50 cents an hors d'oeuvre, we can't.

- And who's Dr. Ridgeland?
- Alice's orthodontist.

- What do we need him for?
- He fixed Alice's teeth.

How would it look if he
wasn't at her sweet 16?

You might as well invite the
pediatrician and obstetrician.

I did. Their names are right there.

[Ralph] Roman theme, huh?

Sounds to me like an
orgy, Harry. An orgy.

All I know is the money is adding up.

Have you checked out this Winston?

He sounds like a degenerate pinko to me.

Believe me, Ralph, with
the prices he's charging

he's definitely a capitalist.

I shudder to think of the
cost of the caviar alone.

Caviar? That's bad news, Harry.
El bado.

Expensive too.

I don't mean that.
That's Ruski food.

You know what caviar is, don't you?

Sure. Fish eggs.

That's what the commies
want you to think.

- They're really human cells.
- What?

That's right. We eat 'em, the
cells grow, take over our bodies

and before you know, we're all Ruskies.

That's why they call it
the internal revolution.

Ralph, you've got a one track mind

and it's derailed.

- What's going on?
- Aren't they beautiful, dear?

Winston thought we should
have special gowns

to fit the Roman theme.

- How much?
- Only $200.

Oh, great.
We're up to a $1,000 now.

- Um... it is $1,300, dear.
- What?

Well, Winston hired a photographer to

take movies of the party.

It'll be something we can treasure

for the rest of our lives.

Oh, it'll be a day to remember alright.

Her sweet 16 party and my bankruptcy.

- Harry!
- Irma.

We didn't spend this much on our wedding

and our honeymoon, which was
six full days in Hawaii.

Oh, good. You're home.

You can start measuring now, Alex.

- Measuring? For what?
- My final touch.

When you make your grand
entrance with Alice

you and your two sons will
be wearing matching togas.

And this is my final touch.

You and your friends will
now make your grand exit.

Right out that door.

- But--
- Out, out.

It's all off. Everybody out.

Some people just don't
know how to give a party.

Alice, I-I didn't mean to be so rough.

- I just--
- It's alright, father.

I understand.

Well, you can still have a party.

It just doesn't have to--

How do kids work it?
You can be so right

and they make you feel so wrong.

It wasn't my fault, Julius.

That crazy caterer pushed me
too far and I lost my temper.

Now you understand that, don't you?

Man's best friend.
That's a laugh.

Pop, when you drive to work
tomorrow, will you drop me off

at the Albright Employment Agency?

Sure.

The house must be haunted.

I heard a voice say "employment agency."

Well, I figured it's
about time I got a job.

Your lips are moving. The voice
must be coming from you.

I really mean it, pop.
I wanna go to work.

What brought this on? Did you
have a personality transplant?

When I realized you couldn't
afford to give a decent party

for a sweet kid like
Alice, I knew you'd need

all the financial help you can get.

Alright, alright. The message is
coming through loud and clear.

Attention, Boyle family.
Front and center.

Once again, the family and I
have had a little disagreement.

And once again, the family has won.

Irma, call Winston.
The party's on.

- Hi, Mr. Hastings.
- Ooh, Mr. Boyle.

I'd given you up for loss.

Yeah, well, I'm here
to apply for a loan.

Oh, sit down. Sit down.
This is a great moment.

I knew you'd realize your
patriotic obligation.

I have to be patriotic.

I'm a father with a teenage daughter.

Yes. Now, how much would
you like to borrow?

- Fifteen hundred dollars.
- That's all?

Remember we must stay over
our heads, Mr. Boyle.

Over our heads.
Shall we say $20,000?

- All I want is $1,500.
- Well, very well.

But for that sum, we're
not going to validate

your parking ticket.

- How's the orgy coming, Harry?
- Behind schedule, I'm afraid.

Orgy? Did I hear someone say orgy?

Ooh-hoo-hoo. Where is it?
How do I get in on it?

Get back to guard duty, sergeant.

Oh, I never have any fun.

Hey, Harry, you're gonna
have a lot of kids

at this orgy, ain't you?

Ralph, it's not an orgy.
It's a sweet 16 party.

Okay, okay. But there's gonna
be a lot of high school kids.

- Right? Right?
- Of course.

I'd like your permission
to bug the tables.

What?

There'll be a certain
percent of them commie.

Commie?

I think our latest figure is, uh, 32.4.

You know, Ralph, they just don't
make men like you anymore.

- They don't, huh?
- No.

They found out what they
were doing wrong and quit.

- Hi.
- Hello, dear.

Where's all the action?
I thought they're supposed to be

setting up for the party.

There's not going to be any party daddy.

- Huh?
- Alice decided to call it off.

Call it off? Why?

Well, I've been thinking about it.

Big splashy parties are so gouache.

Oh, t-they're really not for me.

Alice, who are you kidding?

I know you had your heart
set on that party.

Now why did you call it off?

Papa, when I heard that you
had to go to the bank

and borrow money to pay for
it, I suddenly realized

how selfish I was.

I don't want you to go
into debt because of me.

- Honey, it's alright.
- No, it's not alright.

You wouldn't have done it
if you didn't love me.

And I don't need an expensive
party to know that you do.

Alice is just having her friends over

for a little get-together.

Yeah, and definitely not catered.

Now wait a minute.
That sounds a little skimpy

for my daughter's sweet 16 party.

Can I at least spring for a rock band?

You kids still dance, don't you?

Alright.

And a couple of platters
of delicatessen.

- If it'll make you happy.
- It'll make me happy.

Daddy, I love you.

There's nothing in the world
I wouldn't do for you.

- Nothing?
- Mm-mm.

Would you consider giving up driving?

Well, they seem to be having a ball.

Yeah. It just shows you kids today

know how to have fun without a Winston.

Would you care to dance, Mr. Boyle?

Why not, Mrs. Boyle?

I think we can keep up with them.

Wait a minute, I'll be right back.

- Ralph, Whittaker.
- Shh. We're infiltrating.

Hey, what happened to the Roman orgy?

They're dressed like Americans.

And you two are dressed like nuts.

Now will you get outta here?

Come on, let's wander around anyway.

I got the mic hidden.
If they talk into my toga

I can pick up all the submersive talk.

- Out.
- Okay, okay.

Let's go.
He don't wanna co-operate.

Commander, as long as we're not staying

why don't we just run
up to the duck pond?

[Ralph] Knock it off,
Whittaker. Knock it off.