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1
00:00:43,341 --> 00:00:45,275
Excuse me.
2
00:00:45,310 --> 00:00:47,870
Could you tell me how to get
to the medical school?
3
00:00:47,913 --> 00:00:50,380
I'm supposed to be doing a lecture
in about 20 minutes,
4
00:00:50,416 --> 00:00:52,280
and my driver's
a bit lost.
5
00:00:52,317 --> 00:00:55,150
You go straight ahead,
6
00:00:55,186 --> 00:00:58,485
and, uh, you make a left
over the bridge.
7
00:01:00,091 --> 00:01:02,218
That's a lovely accent
you have.
8
00:01:02,260 --> 00:01:06,162
- New Jersey?
- Austria.
9
00:01:06,197 --> 00:01:08,927
Austria!
Well, then...
10
00:01:08,967 --> 00:01:11,162
G'day, mate.
11
00:01:12,837 --> 00:01:16,136
Let's put another
shrimp on the barbie.
12
00:01:16,174 --> 00:01:18,267
Let's not.
13
00:01:37,829 --> 00:01:40,195
# Boom shack-a-lak-a,
what the people want #
14
00:01:40,231 --> 00:01:42,722
# Women them a flex
and the men them a chant #
15
00:01:42,767 --> 00:01:44,735
# 'Ca' the '60s style,
it have fe come back #
16
00:01:44,769 --> 00:01:47,237
# Draw fe bell-bottom,
block heel and frock #
17
00:01:47,272 --> 00:01:50,002
# Boom shak-a-lak,
rude boy #
18
00:01:50,041 --> 00:01:53,135
# Here when we tell
them now, sir #
19
00:01:53,178 --> 00:01:56,511
# Wine your body,
wriggle your belly #
20
00:01:56,548 --> 00:02:00,314
# Dip and go down-ee
in the new stylee #
21
00:02:00,352 --> 00:02:03,515
# Wine and go up,
wine and go down #
22
00:02:03,555 --> 00:02:07,184
# Bubble and a rocka
to the new style around #
23
00:02:07,225 --> 00:02:10,752
# You fe line it up,
you fe wine it up #
24
00:02:10,795 --> 00:02:14,060
# Do the Boom shak-a-lak
till the dance hall fill up #
25
00:02:14,099 --> 00:02:18,297
# I say the Boom shack-a-lak
are the brand new style #
26
00:02:18,336 --> 00:02:21,863
# Wicked say it wicked,
jah jah, no say it wild #
27
00:02:21,906 --> 00:02:25,342
# Ragamuffin style
fe the discipline child #
28
00:02:25,377 --> 00:02:28,403
# Dip and go downa
'ca' it well versatile #
29
00:02:28,446 --> 00:02:32,280
# You fe move fe your waist,
move fe your back #
30
00:02:32,317 --> 00:02:35,844
# Wine and go down,
do the shack-a-lak-a-lak #
31
00:02:35,887 --> 00:02:39,186
# Get in a groove
'ca' you are the top notch #
32
00:02:39,224 --> 00:02:41,419
# Bubble and a wine gal
right 'pon the spot. #
33
00:02:41,459 --> 00:02:43,984
Now, who's got
the wiener schnitzel?
34
00:02:45,497 --> 00:02:47,465
Beautiful.
There you go, Dolf.
35
00:02:47,499 --> 00:02:49,899
There you go, buddy.
Yeah.
36
00:02:49,934 --> 00:02:51,458
Let's see.
37
00:02:51,503 --> 00:02:54,063
Next, we got
roast beef au jus.
38
00:02:55,874 --> 00:02:57,933
Who's got
the roast beef au jus?
39
00:02:57,976 --> 00:03:00,001
Stella, beautiful.
Bon appetit, Stella.
40
00:03:00,045 --> 00:03:01,842
Oui oui, yeah.
41
00:03:01,880 --> 00:03:04,041
Walk away.
Go on. Go on.
42
00:03:04,082 --> 00:03:06,812
Last but not least-
foot-long!
43
00:03:06,851 --> 00:03:09,843
Who's got the foot-long?
44
00:03:09,888 --> 00:03:11,981
There you-
very funny, rascal.
45
00:03:12,023 --> 00:03:14,218
Very funny.
In your dreams.
46
00:03:14,259 --> 00:03:17,160
Harry, why haven't you
dropped those dogs off at the show yet?
47
00:03:17,195 --> 00:03:19,857
Uh, sir, I didn't
want to send them
48
00:03:19,898 --> 00:03:21,832
to a performance
on an empty stomach, sir.
49
00:03:21,866 --> 00:03:24,460
- Get a move on it!
- Yes, sir.
50
00:03:24,502 --> 00:03:26,834
Mutt cutts.
10-4.
51
00:03:46,391 --> 00:03:47,858
Whew.
52
00:03:47,892 --> 00:03:49,826
Suck me sideways.
53
00:04:02,974 --> 00:04:06,137
Hello.
How are you?
54
00:04:11,549 --> 00:04:13,380
I'll be out
in one minute.
55
00:04:43,348 --> 00:04:45,213
Why are you going
to the airport?
56
00:04:45,250 --> 00:04:47,115
Flying somewhere?
57
00:04:47,152 --> 00:04:48,585
How'd you guess?
58
00:04:48,620 --> 00:04:50,087
I saw your luggage.
59
00:04:50,121 --> 00:04:52,089
Then when I noticed
the airline ticket,
60
00:04:52,123 --> 00:04:54,091
I put two and two
together.
61
00:04:54,125 --> 00:04:56,059
So where're you headed?
62
00:04:56,094 --> 00:04:57,561
Aspen.
63
00:04:57,595 --> 00:04:59,586
Mmm... California.
64
00:04:59,631 --> 00:05:01,826
Beautiful.
65
00:05:04,035 --> 00:05:07,402
Name's Christmas,
Lloyd Christmas.
66
00:05:07,438 --> 00:05:09,633
I'm Mary Swanson.
67
00:05:09,674 --> 00:05:12,643
This isn't my real job,
you know.
68
00:05:12,677 --> 00:05:14,941
- No?
- Nope, my friend Harry and I
69
00:05:14,979 --> 00:05:17,174
are saving up our money
to open our own pet store.
70
00:05:17,215 --> 00:05:19,445
That's nice.
71
00:05:20,451 --> 00:05:23,352
- I got worms.
- I beg your pardon?
72
00:05:23,388 --> 00:05:26,551
That's what we're going to call it-
I Got Worms.
73
00:05:26,591 --> 00:05:29,025
We're going to specialize
in selling worm farms,
74
00:05:29,060 --> 00:05:31,392
you know,
like ant farms.
75
00:05:33,031 --> 00:05:35,056
What's the matter?
76
00:05:35,099 --> 00:05:37,363
A little tense
about the flight?
77
00:05:38,469 --> 00:05:40,266
Something like that.
78
00:05:40,305 --> 00:05:42,933
There's really nothing
to worry about, Mary.
79
00:05:42,974 --> 00:05:45,204
Statistically,
they say you're more likely
80
00:05:45,243 --> 00:05:47,143
to get killed
on the way to the airport,
81
00:05:47,178 --> 00:05:49,612
you know, like in a head-on crash
or flying off a cliff
82
00:05:49,647 --> 00:05:51,581
or getting trapped
under a gas truck-
83
00:05:51,616 --> 00:05:53,550
That's the worst.
I have this cousin-
84
00:05:53,585 --> 00:05:55,212
well, I had this cousin.
85
00:05:55,253 --> 00:05:58,416
Lloyd, could you keep
your eyes on the road, please?
86
00:05:58,523 --> 00:06:00,423
Oh. Yeah.
87
00:06:00,458 --> 00:06:02,221
Good thinking.
88
00:06:02,260 --> 00:06:04,091
Can't be too careful.
89
00:06:04,128 --> 00:06:06,358
A lot of bad drivers
out there.
90
00:06:12,303 --> 00:06:14,669
Hey, watch it!
91
00:06:22,547 --> 00:06:25,345
Okay, gang,
you know the rules-
92
00:06:25,383 --> 00:06:27,510
no humping, no pushing,
no sniffing heinies.
93
00:06:27,552 --> 00:06:32,012
Where have you been? My dogs were
supposed to be here 40 minutes ago!
94
00:06:32,056 --> 00:06:34,024
Now I hardly have any time
to primp them.
95
00:06:34,058 --> 00:06:36,322
Don't worry about a thing,
Mrs. Neugy-burger.
96
00:06:36,361 --> 00:06:38,158
- Neugeboren!
- Neug-neug-neug-
97
00:06:38,196 --> 00:06:39,629
- Boren!
- Boren.
98
00:06:39,664 --> 00:06:41,598
These pooches aren't going to
need any primping.
99
00:06:41,633 --> 00:06:43,260
You know why?
I'll tell you why.
100
00:06:43,301 --> 00:06:45,565
Because I bathed them
and I clipped them myself.
101
00:06:45,603 --> 00:06:48,367
And I stand by
my performance.
102
00:06:58,483 --> 00:07:00,280
You know,
on second thought,
103
00:07:00,318 --> 00:07:02,582
you might just want to run
a comb through 'em.
104
00:07:02,620 --> 00:07:05,085
Male voice:
The white zone is for the immediate
105
00:07:05,123 --> 00:07:07,591
loading and unloading
of passengers only.
106
00:07:07,625 --> 00:07:09,786
No parking.
107
00:07:11,329 --> 00:07:14,059
Thanks.
Here you go.
108
00:07:14,098 --> 00:07:16,566
Oh no, Mary.
109
00:07:16,601 --> 00:07:18,933
I couldn't possibly
accept that,
110
00:07:18,970 --> 00:07:21,370
not after all
we've been through.
111
00:07:24,175 --> 00:07:26,075
Thank you, Lloyd.
112
00:07:26,110 --> 00:07:29,477
- Uh, good luck with your worms.
- Yeah.
113
00:07:29,514 --> 00:07:31,414
Hey.
114
00:07:32,617 --> 00:07:34,414
How about a hug?
115
00:07:34,452 --> 00:07:36,215
The white zone
is for the immediate
116
00:07:36,254 --> 00:07:39,451
loading and unloading
of passengers only.
117
00:07:39,490 --> 00:07:41,321
No parking.
118
00:07:51,069 --> 00:07:53,697
I hate goodbyes.
119
00:07:59,978 --> 00:08:01,969
Uh, Lloyd-
120
00:08:04,215 --> 00:08:06,206
Just go.
121
00:08:27,739 --> 00:08:29,866
Be strong.
122
00:08:43,755 --> 00:08:45,552
Woman over PA:
Mr. Dan Mitchell,
123
00:08:45,590 --> 00:08:48,058
please pick up
the white courtesy phone.
124
00:08:48,092 --> 00:08:52,222
Mr. Dan Mitchell, please pick up
the white courtesy phone...
125
00:08:52,263 --> 00:08:55,630
She's gonna leave the briefcase
near the escalator.
126
00:08:55,666 --> 00:08:59,295
- You make the pickup.
- Piece of cake.
127
00:09:08,279 --> 00:09:10,907
# Goodbye, my lo- #
ugh!
128
00:09:16,554 --> 00:09:18,522
Hi!
129
00:09:18,556 --> 00:09:21,525
Passenger Maura Tadge,
130
00:09:21,559 --> 00:09:24,084
please pick up
the white courtesy phone.
131
00:09:24,128 --> 00:09:25,618
You have a message.
132
00:09:25,663 --> 00:09:27,858
Passenger Maura Tadge.
133
00:09:33,504 --> 00:09:35,495
Agh! Mary!
134
00:09:36,741 --> 00:09:39,539
Man:
There's our payday.
135
00:09:40,578 --> 00:09:42,603
She left it.
Let's go.
136
00:09:42,647 --> 00:09:45,946
Excuse me!
Coming through!
137
00:09:47,652 --> 00:09:51,349
Move it or lose it,
sister!
138
00:09:55,226 --> 00:09:56,693
Hey!
139
00:09:59,764 --> 00:10:01,197
Eenie...
140
00:10:01,232 --> 00:10:03,632
meenie... minie...
141
00:10:03,668 --> 00:10:05,966
mo!
142
00:10:12,743 --> 00:10:14,711
Hold that plane!
143
00:10:14,745 --> 00:10:17,407
Sir, you can't
go in there!
144
00:10:17,448 --> 00:10:18,710
It's okay!
145
00:10:18,749 --> 00:10:20,910
I'm a limo driver!
146
00:10:25,423 --> 00:10:27,823
Agh!
147
00:10:27,859 --> 00:10:30,384
Whew...
148
00:10:49,480 --> 00:10:50,742
Hi, Lloyd.
149
00:10:50,781 --> 00:10:52,408
Hi, Harry.
150
00:10:52,450 --> 00:10:55,283
- How was your day?
- Not bad.
151
00:10:55,319 --> 00:10:57,685
Fell off
the jetway again.
152
00:11:03,194 --> 00:11:04,752
Who the hell you figure
153
00:11:04,795 --> 00:11:06,695
this guy's
working for, anyway?
154
00:11:06,731 --> 00:11:08,790
I don't know.
155
00:11:10,735 --> 00:11:13,795
We sure as hell
better find out.
156
00:11:17,675 --> 00:11:19,302
The ulcer?
157
00:11:19,343 --> 00:11:21,311
I'll live.
158
00:11:28,786 --> 00:11:32,449
- So you got fired again, huh?
- Oh, yeah.
159
00:11:32,490 --> 00:11:36,824
They always freak out when you leave
the scene of an accident, you know?
160
00:11:38,262 --> 00:11:40,662
Yeah, well,
I lost my job too.
161
00:11:40,698 --> 00:11:45,499
Man! You are
one pathetic loser.
162
00:11:45,536 --> 00:11:48,471
No offense.
163
00:11:48,506 --> 00:11:50,701
No. None taken.
164
00:11:54,845 --> 00:11:57,837
You know what really
chaffs my ass, though?
165
00:11:57,882 --> 00:11:59,679
I spent my life's savings
166
00:11:59,717 --> 00:12:01,514
turning my van
into a dog.
167
00:12:01,552 --> 00:12:03,543
Hi, Petey!
168
00:12:03,754 --> 00:12:05,949
The alarm alone
cost me 200.
169
00:12:05,990 --> 00:12:07,981
Hey!
Chicks love it.
170
00:12:08,025 --> 00:12:10,016
It's a shaggin' wagon.
171
00:12:10,061 --> 00:12:12,291
What's with
the briefcase?
172
00:12:16,033 --> 00:12:17,830
It's a love memento.
173
00:12:17,868 --> 00:12:20,666
The most beautiful
woman alive,
174
00:12:20,705 --> 00:12:23,003
I drove her
to the airport.
175
00:12:23,040 --> 00:12:26,009
Sparks flew,
emotions ran high.
176
00:12:26,043 --> 00:12:28,477
She actually
talked to me, man.
177
00:12:28,512 --> 00:12:30,639
Get outta here.
178
00:12:30,681 --> 00:12:33,673
Oh, yeah yeah.
Tractor beam-
179
00:12:33,718 --> 00:12:36,983
sucked me right in.
180
00:12:37,021 --> 00:12:39,990
Anyway...
181
00:12:40,024 --> 00:12:41,992
she left this
in the terminal
182
00:12:42,026 --> 00:12:44,688
and flew to Aspen
and out of my life.
183
00:12:44,729 --> 00:12:46,754
What's in it?
184
00:12:48,766 --> 00:12:51,132
Man... I would
have to be a lowlife
185
00:12:51,168 --> 00:12:54,535
to go rootin' around in somebody else's
private property.
186
00:12:54,572 --> 00:12:57,939
- Is it locked?
- Yeah, really well.
187
00:13:05,616 --> 00:13:08,449
There's two of them.
One of them's got a gun.
188
00:13:10,021 --> 00:13:12,387
Did you pay
the gas bill?
189
00:13:13,891 --> 00:13:15,722
Hey-
190
00:13:15,760 --> 00:13:18,058
Do you realize what you've done?
191
00:13:18,095 --> 00:13:20,029
I'm sorry.
I say we bail.
192
00:13:20,064 --> 00:13:22,294
Okay.
193
00:13:29,206 --> 00:13:31,834
Briefcase ain't here.
194
00:13:31,876 --> 00:13:34,572
They must have
taken it with them.
195
00:13:34,612 --> 00:13:36,580
Well, he's got to
come home sometime.
196
00:13:36,614 --> 00:13:38,104
Maybe we should
trash the place,
197
00:13:38,149 --> 00:13:40,242
send him
a little message.
198
00:13:41,786 --> 00:13:44,186
I don't think he's going to get
that message, Joe.
199
00:13:44,221 --> 00:13:46,553
I mean, the guy's got worms
in his living room.
200
00:13:46,590 --> 00:13:48,751
Well.
201
00:13:48,793 --> 00:13:51,261
Oh, I got
a better idea.
202
00:13:54,098 --> 00:13:56,828
"I tought I taw
a puddy cat.
203
00:13:56,867 --> 00:13:58,630
I did. I did. "
204
00:14:14,118 --> 00:14:16,609
I can't believe
we drove around all day
205
00:14:16,654 --> 00:14:19,487
and there's not
a single job in this town.
206
00:14:19,523 --> 00:14:21,650
There is nothing,
nada, zip!
207
00:14:21,692 --> 00:14:24,490
Yeah, unless you want
to work 40 hours a week.
208
00:14:24,528 --> 00:14:25,961
Pfft!
209
00:14:25,996 --> 00:14:28,123
Here. I'm going to
go to the store.
210
00:14:28,165 --> 00:14:30,030
Okay, just get
the bare essentials.
211
00:14:30,067 --> 00:14:31,864
This is the last
of our dough.
212
00:14:31,902 --> 00:14:34,496
Hey. What do I
look like?
213
00:14:34,538 --> 00:14:38,269
# Take a little walk
to the edge of town #
214
00:14:38,309 --> 00:14:41,039
# Go across the tracks #
215
00:14:42,046 --> 00:14:44,674
# Where the viaduct looms #
216
00:14:44,715 --> 00:14:46,649
# Like a bird of doom #
217
00:14:46,684 --> 00:14:50,245
# As it shifts
and cracks #
218
00:14:50,287 --> 00:14:54,849
# Where secrets lie
in the border fires #
219
00:14:54,892 --> 00:14:56,860
# In the humming wires #
220
00:14:56,894 --> 00:15:00,057
# Hey, man, you know
you're never coming back #
221
00:15:00,097 --> 00:15:01,997
# Past the square,
past the bridge... #
222
00:15:02,032 --> 00:15:03,795
# Past the mills,
past the stack... #
223
00:15:07,037 --> 00:15:09,267
# On a gathering storm #
224
00:15:09,306 --> 00:15:10,967
# Comes a tall
handsome man... #
225
00:15:11,008 --> 00:15:12,805
Cripes!
226
00:15:12,843 --> 00:15:15,869
# In a dusty black coat
with a red right hand. #
227
00:15:21,619 --> 00:15:22,847
Excuse me,
little old lady.
228
00:15:28,225 --> 00:15:30,659
Uh, do you have
change for a dollar?
229
00:15:30,694 --> 00:15:32,218
Change?
230
00:15:32,263 --> 00:15:34,128
No, I'm sorry.
I don't.
231
00:15:34,165 --> 00:15:36,190
Oh... well, uh,
232
00:15:36,233 --> 00:15:39,202
could you do me a favor
and watch my stuff here
233
00:15:39,236 --> 00:15:40,965
while I go
break a dollar?
234
00:15:41,005 --> 00:15:43,337
- Of course.
- Thanks.
235
00:15:43,374 --> 00:15:46,571
Hey. I guess
they're right.
236
00:15:46,610 --> 00:15:48,168
Senior citizens,
237
00:15:48,212 --> 00:15:50,737
although slow and dangerous
behind the wheel,
238
00:15:50,781 --> 00:15:53,614
can still serve
a purpose.
239
00:15:53,651 --> 00:15:56,916
I'll be right back.
Don't you go dying on me!
240
00:16:01,659 --> 00:16:05,117
- Ugh!
- Where's the booze?
241
00:16:05,162 --> 00:16:07,995
I got robbed
by a sweet old lady
242
00:16:08,032 --> 00:16:10,592
on a motorized cart.
243
00:16:10,634 --> 00:16:12,795
I didn't even
see it coming.
244
00:16:14,638 --> 00:16:16,629
- Harry?
- No...
245
00:16:16,674 --> 00:16:18,904
- No...
- Harry. Come on, Harry.
246
00:16:18,943 --> 00:16:20,672
Cheer up.
247
00:16:20,711 --> 00:16:22,770
It gets worse, Lloyd.
248
00:16:22,813 --> 00:16:24,747
My parakeet Petey...
249
00:16:24,782 --> 00:16:27,842
- Yeah?
- ... he's dead.
250
00:16:32,323 --> 00:16:34,257
Oh, man.
I'm sorry, Harry.
251
00:16:34,291 --> 00:16:36,282
What happened?
252
00:16:37,328 --> 00:16:39,296
His head fell off.
253
00:16:39,330 --> 00:16:41,230
His head fell off?
254
00:16:41,265 --> 00:16:43,631
Yeah, he was pretty old.
255
00:16:46,937 --> 00:16:48,302
Ugh!
256
00:16:48,339 --> 00:16:50,273
That's it.
257
00:16:50,307 --> 00:16:52,775
I've had it
with this dump!
258
00:16:52,810 --> 00:16:55,745
We got no food.
We got no jobs.
259
00:16:55,779 --> 00:16:57,748
Our pets' heads are falling off!
260
00:16:57,783 --> 00:16:59,716
Okay, just calm down!
261
00:16:59,750 --> 00:17:02,082
What the hell are we
doing here, Harry?
262
00:17:02,119 --> 00:17:04,246
We gotta get
out of this town!
263
00:17:04,288 --> 00:17:06,848
Yeah? And go where?
Where are we gonna go?
264
00:17:06,891 --> 00:17:09,758
I'll tell you where,
265
00:17:09,793 --> 00:17:11,693
someplace warm...
266
00:17:11,729 --> 00:17:14,027
a place where the beer
flows like wine,
267
00:17:14,064 --> 00:17:16,157
where beautiful women
instinctively flock
268
00:17:16,200 --> 00:17:18,498
like the salmon
of Capistrano.
269
00:17:19,870 --> 00:17:22,134
I'm talking about
a little place called...
270
00:17:22,172 --> 00:17:24,902
Aspen.
271
00:17:24,942 --> 00:17:28,105
I don't know, Lloyd.
The French are assholes.
272
00:17:28,145 --> 00:17:30,579
Wait a minute.
273
00:17:32,816 --> 00:17:35,148
Wait a minute!
I know what you're up to, mister.
274
00:17:35,185 --> 00:17:37,881
Yeah! You just
wanna go to Aspen
275
00:17:37,922 --> 00:17:40,356
and find that girl
who lost her briefcase,
276
00:17:40,391 --> 00:17:42,757
and you need me
to drive you there!
277
00:17:42,793 --> 00:17:45,159
- Right? Am I right?
- Yeah. So?
278
00:17:45,195 --> 00:17:48,596
- Am I right? Am I right?
- Yeah! So?
279
00:17:48,632 --> 00:17:50,896
So I wanna go someplace
where we know somebody
280
00:17:50,935 --> 00:17:52,903
who can plug us into
the social pipeline.
281
00:17:52,937 --> 00:17:55,235
No! No no no!
No, Lloyd!
282
00:17:55,272 --> 00:17:58,070
No! I say we stay here,
we hunt for jobs,
283
00:17:58,108 --> 00:18:00,702
and we keep saving our money
for the worm store!
284
00:18:00,744 --> 00:18:03,008
I don't know about you,
285
00:18:03,047 --> 00:18:04,708
but I am getting
sick and tired
286
00:18:04,748 --> 00:18:06,215
of-of running
from creditors!
287
00:18:06,250 --> 00:18:09,879
You know what I'm sick
and tired of, Harry?
288
00:18:11,755 --> 00:18:15,384
I'm sick and tired of having to
eke my way through life.
289
00:18:19,797 --> 00:18:21,958
I'm sick and tired
of being a nobody.
290
00:18:23,267 --> 00:18:25,394
But most of all...
291
00:18:29,707 --> 00:18:32,904
I'm sick and tired
of having nobody.
292
00:18:35,245 --> 00:18:37,270
Okay, Lloyd.
293
00:18:40,951 --> 00:18:43,112
Aspen it is.
294
00:18:46,757 --> 00:18:48,748
You'd better not
be foolin'.
295
00:18:54,798 --> 00:18:57,767
Okay okay,
296
00:18:57,801 --> 00:18:59,826
just let it out.
Have a good cry.
297
00:18:59,870 --> 00:19:01,838
Come on.
298
00:19:01,872 --> 00:19:03,669
Okay.
299
00:19:06,210 --> 00:19:08,312
Okay, that's enough.
300
00:19:14,451 --> 00:19:16,715
# I never met a girl #
301
00:19:16,754 --> 00:19:19,848
# Who made me feel
the way that you do #
302
00:19:19,890 --> 00:19:22,051
# You're all right #
303
00:19:22,092 --> 00:19:25,027
# Whenever I'm asked
who makes my dreams real #
304
00:19:25,062 --> 00:19:28,998
# I tell them you do,
you're outta sight #
305
00:19:29,033 --> 00:19:32,196
# I'm bringin ' you
a love that's true #
306
00:19:32,236 --> 00:19:36,297
# So get ready,
get ready #
307
00:19:36,340 --> 00:19:38,968
# I'm gonna try
to make you love me too #
308
00:19:39,009 --> 00:19:43,742
# So get ready, get ready,
here I come #
309
00:19:43,781 --> 00:19:45,942
# Get ready
'cause here I come... #
310
00:19:45,983 --> 00:19:47,848
Lloyd,
what are you doing?
311
00:19:47,885 --> 00:19:50,080
It feels like you're running
at an incredible rate, Harry.
312
00:19:50,120 --> 00:19:52,247
Would you quit it?
We're not even through Connecticut yet,
313
00:19:52,289 --> 00:19:53,483
and already
you're annoying me.
314
00:19:53,524 --> 00:19:56,015
- Sorry.
- Jeez.
315
00:19:56,060 --> 00:19:59,257
- We're really doing it, aren't we?
- Yeah.
316
00:20:00,264 --> 00:20:01,891
Hey, where'd
you get those?
317
00:20:01,932 --> 00:20:05,368
I bought them
when we filled up.
318
00:20:05,402 --> 00:20:07,427
Well-
we're supposed to talk
319
00:20:07,471 --> 00:20:09,234
about all
expenditures, Lloyd.
320
00:20:09,273 --> 00:20:11,104
We're on a very
tight budget.
321
00:20:11,141 --> 00:20:13,371
This didn't come out
of our travel fund.
322
00:20:14,912 --> 00:20:16,812
No, I was able to raise
25 extra bucks
323
00:20:16,847 --> 00:20:19,213
before we left.
324
00:20:19,249 --> 00:20:21,479
Where did you get
25 extra bucks?
325
00:20:21,518 --> 00:20:24,749
I sold some stuff
to Billy in 4C.
326
00:20:24,788 --> 00:20:27,188
The blind kid?
327
00:20:27,224 --> 00:20:29,317
Yeah!
328
00:20:29,359 --> 00:20:31,054
Yeah.
329
00:20:31,095 --> 00:20:33,529
What did you
sell him, Lloyd?
330
00:20:35,132 --> 00:20:36,895
Stuff.
331
00:20:36,934 --> 00:20:40,392
- What kind of stuff?
- I don't know.
332
00:20:40,437 --> 00:20:42,530
A few baseball cards,
a sack of marbles...
333
00:20:42,573 --> 00:20:44,734
Petey.
334
00:20:46,310 --> 00:20:48,244
Petey?
335
00:20:48,278 --> 00:20:51,179
You sold my dead bird
to a blind kid?
336
00:20:51,215 --> 00:20:54,378
Lloyd, that-that-
what are you-
337
00:20:54,418 --> 00:20:56,909
Petey didn't even
have a head!
338
00:20:56,954 --> 00:21:00,287
Harry,
I took care of it.
339
00:21:03,060 --> 00:21:05,028
Pretty bird.
340
00:21:05,062 --> 00:21:06,859
Yeah. Can you say,
"pretty bird"?
341
00:21:06,897 --> 00:21:08,455
Pretty bird.
342
00:21:08,499 --> 00:21:11,127
Yes, pretty bird.
343
00:21:11,168 --> 00:21:13,261
Pretty bird.
344
00:21:16,573 --> 00:21:18,598
Polly want a cracker?
345
00:21:22,312 --> 00:21:23,939
Those rat bastards.
346
00:21:23,981 --> 00:21:26,108
They're rubbing it
right in our faces.
347
00:21:26,150 --> 00:21:28,141
Man, Andre'll have
a goddamn hemorrhage
348
00:21:28,185 --> 00:21:29,982
if we don't get
that briefcase back.
349
00:21:30,020 --> 00:21:32,045
They must have been
following us for weeks.
350
00:21:32,089 --> 00:21:35,286
- Why you say?
- "Gas Man. "
351
00:21:35,325 --> 00:21:37,987
How the hell do
they know that I got gas?
352
00:21:38,028 --> 00:21:40,121
They gotta be pros.
353
00:21:41,498 --> 00:21:44,262
Don't worry.
We're going to get that money back.
354
00:21:45,335 --> 00:21:47,963
And I'll tell you
something else,
355
00:21:48,005 --> 00:21:49,996
they ain't never
getting to Aspen.
356
00:21:50,040 --> 00:21:52,304
I'm going to see to that.
357
00:21:57,948 --> 00:21:59,939
Lloyd:
They got The Monkees.
358
00:21:59,983 --> 00:22:02,042
They were a major influence
on The Beatles.
359
00:22:02,085 --> 00:22:04,383
Yeah, I know.
360
00:22:05,522 --> 00:22:07,581
Excuse me, Flo?
361
00:22:16,333 --> 00:22:18,665
Flo, like the TV show.
362
00:22:20,204 --> 00:22:23,173
Uh... what is
the "soup du jour"?
363
00:22:23,207 --> 00:22:24,868
It's the soup of the day.
364
00:22:24,908 --> 00:22:26,569
Mm-hmm...
365
00:22:26,610 --> 00:22:28,737
That sounds good.
I'll have that.
366
00:22:30,047 --> 00:22:32,311
Anything else
before I leave the area?
367
00:22:32,349 --> 00:22:34,112
No- yeah-
368
00:22:34,151 --> 00:22:36,016
yes yes,
my soda's flat.
369
00:22:36,053 --> 00:22:38,351
It doesn't have
any bubbles.
370
00:22:45,562 --> 00:22:47,325
Happy now?
371
00:22:51,568 --> 00:22:54,366
Feels good to mingle
with these laid-back country folk,
372
00:22:54,404 --> 00:22:58,465
don't it, Harr?
I like it a lot.
373
00:23:00,043 --> 00:23:03,171
- Uh-oh.
- What? What's the matter?
374
00:23:06,283 --> 00:23:09,013
You spilled the salt,
that's what's the matter.
375
00:23:09,052 --> 00:23:12,078
Spilling the salt
is very bad luck.
376
00:23:12,122 --> 00:23:14,147
We're driving
across the country.
377
00:23:14,191 --> 00:23:16,352
The last thing we need
is bad luck.
378
00:23:16,393 --> 00:23:19,885
Quick. Toss some salt
over your right shoulder.
379
00:23:25,235 --> 00:23:28,693
Uh-oh, too little
too late, Harry.
380
00:23:31,241 --> 00:23:34,972
Who's the dead man
that hit me with the salt shaker?
381
00:23:44,554 --> 00:23:46,988
Well...
382
00:23:47,024 --> 00:23:48,548
it was a terrible
mistake, sir.
383
00:23:48,592 --> 00:23:50,992
Please, believe me.
I would never do anything
384
00:23:51,028 --> 00:23:52,552
to offend a man
of your size.
385
00:23:52,596 --> 00:23:54,860
Kick his ass,
Sea Bass!
386
00:23:58,035 --> 00:23:59,525
You gonna eat that?
387
00:23:59,569 --> 00:24:01,264
What? That?
No- yes- no.
388
00:24:01,305 --> 00:24:03,296
Well... no,
it crossed my mind.
389
00:24:03,340 --> 00:24:05,399
Yeah.
390
00:24:19,489 --> 00:24:21,252
Still want it?
391
00:24:21,291 --> 00:24:24,283
Nah, you go ahead.
392
00:24:29,499 --> 00:24:32,696
You really
wimped out, man.
393
00:24:32,736 --> 00:24:34,727
What are you talking about,
wimped out?
394
00:24:34,771 --> 00:24:37,740
Well-well, did you-
the guy hawked on my burger!
395
00:24:37,774 --> 00:24:40,004
Hey, wait a second.
396
00:24:40,043 --> 00:24:42,307
I think I just...
397
00:24:42,346 --> 00:24:45,338
Yeah...
I just had an idea.
398
00:24:49,686 --> 00:24:51,916
Follow me.
399
00:24:53,657 --> 00:24:55,750
Whew.
400
00:24:58,762 --> 00:25:00,593
Lloyd:
Excuse me. Guys?
401
00:25:00,630 --> 00:25:02,325
What the hell
do you want?
402
00:25:02,366 --> 00:25:05,733
Uh... I just want
to apologize
403
00:25:05,769 --> 00:25:07,566
for that uh...
unpleasant scene
404
00:25:07,604 --> 00:25:09,299
a little earlier.
405
00:25:09,339 --> 00:25:12,740
My friend Harry and I
would, uh...
406
00:25:12,776 --> 00:25:15,108
like to buy
you guys a...
407
00:25:15,145 --> 00:25:17,136
round of beers...
408
00:25:17,180 --> 00:25:19,080
just to bury
the hatchet.
409
00:25:19,116 --> 00:25:21,346
Make it
four boilermakers.
410
00:25:21,385 --> 00:25:23,285
Whatever you want, sir.
411
00:25:23,320 --> 00:25:26,312
I'll have the waitress
bring it over immediately.
412
00:25:27,824 --> 00:25:30,122
Lloyd, what are you doing?
413
00:25:30,160 --> 00:25:32,321
We can't afford
to buy them drinks.
414
00:25:35,232 --> 00:25:37,393
Um... excuse me.
415
00:25:37,434 --> 00:25:41,302
Sea Bass and the fellas
offered to pick up our check.
416
00:25:41,338 --> 00:25:43,863
They said just put it
on their tab.
417
00:25:45,208 --> 00:25:46,732
They're very nice.
418
00:25:47,744 --> 00:25:49,735
Sea Bass said that?
419
00:25:49,780 --> 00:25:52,180
Well, if uh...
420
00:25:52,215 --> 00:25:54,945
that guy at the table
over there is Sea Bass.
421
00:26:02,592 --> 00:26:05,288
All right,
if that's what he wants.
422
00:26:06,296 --> 00:26:08,264
Put these
on there too, okay?
423
00:26:08,298 --> 00:26:10,664
You got it.
424
00:26:15,906 --> 00:26:18,636
I'm gonna kill
those sons of bitches!
425
00:26:23,713 --> 00:26:26,238
That was genius, Lloyd,
sheer genius!
426
00:26:26,283 --> 00:26:28,615
I mean, where did you come up
with a scam like that?
427
00:26:28,652 --> 00:26:32,418
- Saw it in a movie once.
- That was incredible!
428
00:26:32,456 --> 00:26:34,890
So what happened?
So the guy tricks some sucker
429
00:26:34,925 --> 00:26:37,826
into picking up his tab,
then gets away with it scot-free?
430
00:26:37,861 --> 00:26:41,490
No, in the movie, they catch up to him
a half-mile down the road
431
00:26:41,531 --> 00:26:44,728
and slit his throat.
It was a good one!
432
00:26:46,670 --> 00:26:49,662
Wow.
433
00:26:49,706 --> 00:26:52,607
- Harry?
- What?
434
00:26:52,642 --> 00:26:54,576
I know this isn't
the best time, but...
435
00:26:54,611 --> 00:26:56,841
- when you get a chance to pull over...
- Yeah?
436
00:26:56,880 --> 00:26:58,609
- I gotta pee.
- What, are you crazy?
437
00:26:58,648 --> 00:27:00,275
I'm not pulling over now.
438
00:27:00,317 --> 00:27:02,285
But I gotta go!
What am I supposed to do?
439
00:27:02,319 --> 00:27:05,550
Well-well, whiz in one of the empty beer
bottles in the back.
440
00:27:05,589 --> 00:27:08,217
They're on the floor.
Just get one of-
441
00:27:08,258 --> 00:27:10,749
- Jeez, Lloyd!
- Quit moving around!
442
00:27:11,761 --> 00:27:13,353
Huh! What-
443
00:27:13,396 --> 00:27:15,364
Shit!
444
00:27:17,634 --> 00:27:19,363
- Watch the seat! Watch the seat!
- Okay!
445
00:27:19,402 --> 00:27:22,139
All right!
446
00:27:30,313 --> 00:27:34,306
- Uh-oh.
- What? What's wrong?
447
00:27:34,351 --> 00:27:36,683
The bottle's almost full
and I'm still going.
448
00:27:36,720 --> 00:27:39,689
- So stop going.
- I can't stop going once I've started.
449
00:27:39,723 --> 00:27:41,657
It stings.
450
00:27:41,691 --> 00:27:43,215
Quick! Get me
another bottle.
451
00:27:43,260 --> 00:27:44,488
- What?
- Come on.
452
00:27:44,528 --> 00:27:46,155
Hurry hurry hurry
hurry hurry hurry!
453
00:27:46,196 --> 00:27:47,754
Come on! Come on!
454
00:27:47,797 --> 00:27:50,129
Okay okay, here
here here. Hold it!
455
00:27:53,637 --> 00:27:57,573
- Hold that.
- Jesus.
456
00:28:02,179 --> 00:28:04,443
Hold that one.
457
00:28:04,481 --> 00:28:06,210
Hurry.
I'm pinching it.
458
00:28:06,249 --> 00:28:08,183
What are you,
a camel?
459
00:28:11,254 --> 00:28:15,452
Pull over!
460
00:28:18,795 --> 00:28:21,059
- Huh?
- Pull over!
461
00:28:22,699 --> 00:28:25,293
No, it's a cardigan,
but thanks for noticing.
462
00:28:25,335 --> 00:28:28,361
Yeah.
Killer boots, man!
463
00:28:28,405 --> 00:28:32,068
Pull your vehicle
to the side of the road!
464
00:28:40,350 --> 00:28:43,080
License and registration,
please.
465
00:28:47,390 --> 00:28:50,757
You fellas were going a little fast back
there, wouldn't you say?
466
00:28:52,229 --> 00:28:54,390
You, uh...
you fellas been doing
467
00:28:54,431 --> 00:28:56,262
a bit of boozing,
have you?
468
00:28:56,299 --> 00:28:58,927
Sucking back on Grandpa's
old cough medicine?
469
00:28:58,969 --> 00:29:00,300
No. Oh no, sir.
470
00:29:00,337 --> 00:29:01,702
- No no no.
- No, huh-uh.
471
00:29:01,738 --> 00:29:04,639
Yeah, well,
what's that?
472
00:29:06,309 --> 00:29:08,743
- That's nothing, sir.
- Yeah, nothing.
473
00:29:08,778 --> 00:29:11,838
Yeah well, you aware that
it's against the law
474
00:29:11,881 --> 00:29:13,678
to have an open
alcohol container
475
00:29:13,717 --> 00:29:15,548
here in the State
of Pennsylvania?
476
00:29:15,585 --> 00:29:16,950
Come on,
give me that booze,
477
00:29:16,987 --> 00:29:19,319
you little pumpkin-pie-
haircutted freak!
478
00:29:19,356 --> 00:29:21,017
Come on!
479
00:29:29,299 --> 00:29:30,596
Sir, no, I-I-
480
00:29:30,634 --> 00:29:32,261
No, sir, don't.
Don't drink-
481
00:29:32,302 --> 00:29:33,860
You'd keep
your mouth shut
482
00:29:33,903 --> 00:29:36,064
if you knew what was
good for you, buddy.
483
00:29:52,322 --> 00:29:53,687
Tic Tac, sir?
484
00:29:53,723 --> 00:29:55,816
Get the hell
outta here!
485
00:30:00,463 --> 00:30:04,365
How could they not
have gotten the ransom?
486
00:30:04,401 --> 00:30:05,993
It just doesn't
make sense.
487
00:30:06,036 --> 00:30:09,028
I left the money exactly where they
instructed me to.
488
00:30:09,072 --> 00:30:10,835
Oh, it makes
perfect sense, Mary.
489
00:30:10,874 --> 00:30:12,705
We should have called
the authorities
490
00:30:12,742 --> 00:30:14,539
the minute we knew
that Bobby was kidnapped.
491
00:30:14,577 --> 00:30:16,408
Now, Helen, we've been
through this already.
492
00:30:16,446 --> 00:30:19,381
- Mr. Andre.
- Nicholas.
493
00:30:19,416 --> 00:30:22,715
- Karl.
- Nick Nick Nick.
494
00:30:22,752 --> 00:30:24,379
Any word yet, sir?
495
00:30:24,421 --> 00:30:26,389
No, nothing yet,
Nicholas.
496
00:30:28,425 --> 00:30:30,393
I've been giving this
a lot of thought.
497
00:30:30,427 --> 00:30:32,486
Maybe we should cancel
498
00:30:32,529 --> 00:30:34,588
the preservation benefit
this weekend.
499
00:30:34,631 --> 00:30:36,496
It would be so easy
to reschedule it.
500
00:30:36,533 --> 00:30:38,967
No, I don't think we should do anything
out of the ordinary.
501
00:30:39,002 --> 00:30:42,028
Yeah, she's right. It's imperative that we
carry on as usual...
502
00:30:42,072 --> 00:30:43,767
- Okay.
- ... especially you, Mary.
503
00:30:43,807 --> 00:30:45,536
What am I
supposed to do,
504
00:30:45,575 --> 00:30:47,770
just go about my life
like everything is fine?
505
00:30:47,811 --> 00:30:49,642
That's exactly
what you should do.
506
00:30:49,679 --> 00:30:51,806
Yes, go skiing, go to parties,
act normally, you know.
507
00:30:51,848 --> 00:30:53,440
Yeah, don't you see,
honey?
508
00:30:53,483 --> 00:30:55,348
We can't let on
that anything's wrong.
509
00:30:55,385 --> 00:30:57,580
If the press or the authorities
get wind of this,
510
00:30:57,620 --> 00:30:59,053
the kidnappers
may panic.
511
00:30:59,089 --> 00:31:01,614
Mm. I mean,
you never know
512
00:31:01,658 --> 00:31:03,626
what they might
do to him then.
513
00:31:21,378 --> 00:31:23,710
# I saw her sitting
in the rain #
514
00:31:24,981 --> 00:31:27,677
# Raindrops
falling on her #
515
00:31:27,717 --> 00:31:29,810
# She didn't seem to care #
516
00:31:29,853 --> 00:31:34,347
# She sat there
and smiled at me #
517
00:31:34,391 --> 00:31:37,952
- # Then I knew #
- # I knew, I knew, I knew, I knew #
518
00:31:37,994 --> 00:31:41,760
- # She could make me happy #
- # Happy happy #
519
00:31:41,798 --> 00:31:43,561
# She could make me
very happy... #
520
00:31:43,600 --> 00:31:46,933
# Flowers in her hair #
521
00:31:46,970 --> 00:31:51,430
# Flowers everywhere #
522
00:31:51,474 --> 00:31:53,669
# I love
the flower-girl #
523
00:31:53,710 --> 00:31:55,541
# Oh, I don't know
just why #
524
00:31:55,578 --> 00:31:57,910
# She simply
caught my eye #
525
00:31:57,947 --> 00:32:00,814
# I love
the flower-girl... #
526
00:32:00,850 --> 00:32:02,715
So he says,
" Do you love me?"
527
00:32:02,752 --> 00:32:05,778
and she says, " No, but that's
a real nice ski mask. "
528
00:32:12,929 --> 00:32:14,396
Hey, man,
what's that?
529
00:32:43,493 --> 00:32:45,723
# I knew I had to
say hello #
530
00:32:45,762 --> 00:32:47,024
# Hello hello #
531
00:32:47,063 --> 00:32:50,760
# She smiled up at me #
532
00:32:50,800 --> 00:32:52,495
# And she took my hand #
533
00:32:52,535 --> 00:32:55,936
# And we walked through
the park alone #
534
00:32:56,973 --> 00:32:58,736
# And I knew #
535
00:32:58,775 --> 00:33:00,470
# I knew, I knew,
I knew, I knew #
536
00:33:00,510 --> 00:33:01,943
# She had made me
happy... #
537
00:33:01,978 --> 00:33:03,946
Whoo!
538
00:33:03,980 --> 00:33:06,039
# Happy happy,
she had made me very happy #
539
00:33:06,082 --> 00:33:08,744
# Flowers in her hair... #
540
00:34:38,107 --> 00:34:42,043
- # Suddenly, the sun broke through #
- # See the sun #
541
00:34:42,078 --> 00:34:46,071
- # I turned around, she was gone #
- # Where did she go? #
542
00:35:00,229 --> 00:35:04,029
# Flowers in her hair #
543
00:35:04,067 --> 00:35:08,265
# Flowers everywhere #
544
00:35:08,304 --> 00:35:10,568
# I love
the flower-girl #
545
00:35:10,607 --> 00:35:12,302
# Was she reality #
546
00:35:12,342 --> 00:35:14,936
# Or just a dream
to me? #
547
00:35:14,978 --> 00:35:18,778
# I love
the flower-girl #
548
00:35:18,815 --> 00:35:20,783
# Her love showed me the way... #
549
00:35:20,817 --> 00:35:23,945
# To find a sunny day. #
550
00:35:33,096 --> 00:35:36,122
You want me
to drive?
551
00:35:36,165 --> 00:35:38,633
No, I'm cool.
552
00:36:12,135 --> 00:36:14,103
Yeah!
553
00:36:14,137 --> 00:36:16,628
Get her!
554
00:36:24,414 --> 00:36:26,746
This is the life-
555
00:36:26,783 --> 00:36:29,650
cold beer, a hot tub
and paper-thin walls.
556
00:36:32,388 --> 00:36:35,357
There's only one thing that could make this
moment any better.
557
00:36:35,391 --> 00:36:37,052
What's that?
558
00:36:37,093 --> 00:36:38,993
If you had a nice set
of knockers.
559
00:36:39,028 --> 00:36:41,826
That's two things, Lloyd.
560
00:36:41,864 --> 00:36:44,799
Yeah, well, it's a good thing you're not
stacked, Harry,
561
00:36:44,834 --> 00:36:46,301
or I'd be banging you
right now.
562
00:36:48,271 --> 00:36:50,364
I'd show you what
a real man can do.
563
00:36:50,406 --> 00:36:54,001
Split you like an
old piece of firewood.
564
00:36:57,146 --> 00:36:59,979
You'd probably like it too,
you big homo.
565
00:37:00,016 --> 00:37:01,711
Shut up.
566
00:37:01,751 --> 00:37:04,948
Don't tell me
to shut up, woman.
567
00:37:14,297 --> 00:37:16,026
I don't know, Lloyd.
You know,
568
00:37:16,065 --> 00:37:17,896
this place doesn't
really do it for me.
569
00:37:17,934 --> 00:37:20,061
It brings back
a lot of memories.
570
00:37:21,070 --> 00:37:22,833
Pour quoi?
571
00:37:22,872 --> 00:37:26,399
It was a few years ago.
572
00:37:26,442 --> 00:37:29,206
What happened, Harry?
Some little filly break your heart?
573
00:37:29,245 --> 00:37:30,837
No, it was a girl.
574
00:37:30,880 --> 00:37:32,370
- Oh.
- Fraida Felcher.
575
00:37:32,415 --> 00:37:34,781
Yeah, we stayed in a place
just like this.
576
00:37:34,817 --> 00:37:37,217
Wasn't this classy,
but, you know, nice.
577
00:37:37,253 --> 00:37:40,154
Felcher?
From Cranston?
578
00:37:40,189 --> 00:37:41,486
Yeah.
You know her?
579
00:37:41,524 --> 00:37:43,321
Oh, yeah!
580
00:37:43,359 --> 00:37:45,884
I mean,
I remember you...
581
00:37:45,928 --> 00:37:48,294
talking about her.
582
00:37:48,331 --> 00:37:52,768
We had the most incredibly
romantic time.
583
00:37:52,802 --> 00:37:54,895
I thought we were gonna be
together forever,
584
00:37:54,937 --> 00:37:57,235
and then about a week later,
right out of the blue,
585
00:37:57,273 --> 00:37:58,934
she sends me
a John Deere letter.
586
00:37:58,975 --> 00:38:02,069
- She give you any reason?
- Yeah, I called her up.
587
00:38:02,111 --> 00:38:03,806
She gave me
a bunch of crap
588
00:38:03,846 --> 00:38:06,178
about me not listening to her
enough or something.
589
00:38:06,215 --> 00:38:08,115
I don't know.
I wasn't really paying attention.
590
00:38:08,151 --> 00:38:10,085
But the thing
that hurt the most
591
00:38:10,119 --> 00:38:12,747
is I think she was
seeing another guy.
592
00:38:16,058 --> 00:38:19,357
Never did
find out who.
593
00:38:41,284 --> 00:38:44,947
Mr. Andre, guess who
we just happened upon?
594
00:38:44,987 --> 00:38:48,047
- Yeah.
- I had plans.
595
00:38:48,090 --> 00:38:49,955
- Things I wanted to do.
- Yeah.
596
00:38:49,992 --> 00:38:52,017
This is where it all ends-
at a phone booth.
597
00:38:52,061 --> 00:38:53,892
Yeah. The boys are holed up
598
00:38:53,930 --> 00:38:55,795
in a little love-nest
for the night.
599
00:38:55,832 --> 00:38:58,528
I think they're
a little bit strange.
600
00:38:58,568 --> 00:39:01,162
What the hell are
these guys up to?
601
00:39:01,204 --> 00:39:03,434
I mean, is it possible
that they could be feds?
602
00:39:03,472 --> 00:39:06,100
Highly unlikely
from what I've seen.
603
00:39:06,142 --> 00:39:08,133
Sir, did you
ever hear
604
00:39:08,177 --> 00:39:11,112
of the concept
of other people?
605
00:39:11,147 --> 00:39:15,140
Um... me being that
for the phone,
606
00:39:15,184 --> 00:39:16,446
sir.
607
00:39:16,485 --> 00:39:19,181
Oh, you turned
your back on me.
608
00:39:19,222 --> 00:39:21,588
Ho ho ho!
He got me mad. I almost like it.
609
00:39:21,624 --> 00:39:23,819
You and Shay were
supposed to grab that bag
610
00:39:23,860 --> 00:39:25,987
- so we could end this shit!
- Here's your drink, baby.
611
00:39:26,028 --> 00:39:29,464
Do you know the damage
I could do to you?
612
00:39:29,498 --> 00:39:33,093
Hold on a minute.
613
00:39:33,135 --> 00:39:35,228
Hmm.
614
00:39:35,271 --> 00:39:37,000
But that's not
your problem.
615
00:39:37,039 --> 00:39:38,973
You didn't know.
616
00:39:39,008 --> 00:39:41,704
Get off
the phone.
617
00:39:43,579 --> 00:39:47,208
Get off the pho-
618
00:39:50,186 --> 00:39:52,484
I'm sorry, Mr. Andre.
You were saying?
619
00:39:52,521 --> 00:39:54,455
Look, Mental,
620
00:39:54,490 --> 00:39:57,152
these jokers have got a lot of money
and it belongs to me!
621
00:39:57,193 --> 00:40:00,094
Now, I want to know who they are
and what they're doing with it!
622
00:40:00,129 --> 00:40:03,326
Hey hey hey, I told you already.
I'm on it.
623
00:40:03,366 --> 00:40:06,563
- All right?
- Good.
624
00:40:10,106 --> 00:40:11,604
According to the map,
625
00:40:11,641 --> 00:40:13,268
we've only gone
about four inches.
626
00:40:13,309 --> 00:40:15,004
You know,
I don't think
627
00:40:15,044 --> 00:40:16,477
we have enough
gas money.
628
00:40:16,512 --> 00:40:19,970
Relax. We have
more than enough.
629
00:40:20,016 --> 00:40:21,984
I think
you're wrong, Lloyd.
630
00:40:22,018 --> 00:40:23,315
How much
you wanna bet?
631
00:40:23,352 --> 00:40:25,013
I don't bet.
632
00:40:25,054 --> 00:40:26,487
What do you mean,
you don't bet?
633
00:40:26,522 --> 00:40:28,217
I mean I don't bet.
I don't gamble.
634
00:40:28,257 --> 00:40:30,282
Pussy pussy pussy!
635
00:40:30,326 --> 00:40:33,352
- I never have, and I never will.
- Yeah, right!
636
00:40:33,396 --> 00:40:36,126
I'll bet you 20 bucks
I can get you gambling
637
00:40:36,165 --> 00:40:38,258
- before the end of the day.
- No way.
638
00:40:38,301 --> 00:40:39,962
- I'll give you 3-to-1 odds.
- Nope.
639
00:40:40,002 --> 00:40:41,162
- 5-to-1?
- Nope.
640
00:40:41,203 --> 00:40:43,398
- 10-to-1?
- You're on.
641
00:40:47,009 --> 00:40:48,442
I'm going
to get you.
642
00:40:48,477 --> 00:40:51,310
- Huh-uh.
- Oh, yeah.
643
00:40:51,347 --> 00:40:53,474
I don't know how,
but I'm going to get you.
644
00:40:53,516 --> 00:40:56,644
- Yeah. Oh, yeah.
- Nuh-uh.
645
00:40:56,686 --> 00:40:58,449
Come on, Joe.
Let me do them.
646
00:40:58,487 --> 00:41:00,284
Let me do
both of them.
647
00:41:00,323 --> 00:41:01,881
You wouldn't even have
to worry about it.
648
00:41:01,924 --> 00:41:03,448
Just shut up!
649
00:41:03,492 --> 00:41:05,619
Now, we don't even know
who the hell they are.
650
00:41:05,661 --> 00:41:07,652
You don't kill people
you don't know.
651
00:41:07,697 --> 00:41:09,096
That's a rule.
652
00:41:09,131 --> 00:41:10,496
Now, I want you
to get up here,
653
00:41:10,533 --> 00:41:11,966
lie down
on the front seat.
654
00:41:12,001 --> 00:41:15,903
When they pick me up,
you follow us. You got that?
655
00:41:15,938 --> 00:41:18,270
Keep your shirt on.
I gotta squeeze a lemon.
656
00:41:25,247 --> 00:41:27,715
Hey, hey, hey.
Here they come.
657
00:41:27,750 --> 00:41:30,514
Stay down, stay down!
658
00:41:40,763 --> 00:41:43,994
Say, uh, are you guys
going to Davenport?
659
00:41:44,033 --> 00:41:47,366
My car died, and I'm late
for a luncheon.
660
00:41:48,504 --> 00:41:52,668
We usually don't
pick up hitchhikers,
661
00:41:52,708 --> 00:41:56,508
but I'm going to go with my instinct
on this one.
662
00:41:56,545 --> 00:41:59,013
Saddle up, partner.
663
00:42:00,383 --> 00:42:02,180
You're it.
664
00:42:02,218 --> 00:42:04,243
- You're it.
- You're it! Quitsies!
665
00:42:04,286 --> 00:42:06,345
Anti-quitsies.
You're it. Quitsies. No anti-quitsies.
666
00:42:06,389 --> 00:42:07,686
- No startsies.
- You can't do that.
667
00:42:07,723 --> 00:42:09,691
- Can too.
- Cannot. Stamped it.
668
00:42:09,725 --> 00:42:11,249
Can too. Double-stamped it.
No erasies.
669
00:42:11,293 --> 00:42:13,591
Cannot. Triple-stamped it.
No erasies.
670
00:42:13,629 --> 00:42:16,223
You can't triple-stamp
a double-stamp!
671
00:42:16,265 --> 00:42:19,166
You can't triple-stamp
a double-stamp, Lloyd!
672
00:42:19,201 --> 00:42:21,192
You can't triple-stamp a double-stamp.
Lloyd! Lloyd!
673
00:42:21,237 --> 00:42:22,932
Guys! Enough!
674
00:42:26,442 --> 00:42:30,776
Hey, you wanna hear the most annoying
sound in the world?
675
00:42:34,283 --> 00:42:37,309
Guys! Guys! Guys!
676
00:42:38,754 --> 00:42:42,781
Fellas,
you think we could
677
00:42:42,825 --> 00:42:45,293
listen to the radio
or something?
678
00:42:46,529 --> 00:42:48,497
Radio?
679
00:42:48,531 --> 00:42:51,523
Who needs a radio?
Ready, Harry?
680
00:42:53,069 --> 00:42:54,764
- # Mock- #
- # Yeah #
681
00:42:54,804 --> 00:42:56,738
- # -ing- #
- # Yeah #
682
00:42:56,772 --> 00:42:59,070
- # -bird #
- # Yeah #
683
00:42:59,108 --> 00:43:00,769
- # Yeah #
- # Yeah #
684
00:43:00,810 --> 00:43:02,778
Both:
# Mockingbird #
685
00:43:02,812 --> 00:43:06,179
# Don't- everybody,
have you heard? #
686
00:43:06,215 --> 00:43:09,514
# She's gonna buy me
a mockingbird #
687
00:43:09,552 --> 00:43:14,251
# And if that mockingbird
don't sing #
688
00:43:14,290 --> 00:43:18,386
# She's gonna buy me
a diamond ring #
689
00:43:18,427 --> 00:43:21,487
# And if that diamond ring
don't shine... #
690
00:43:21,530 --> 00:43:23,498
Hey, Lloyd, look! There's some people
who want a ride too.
691
00:43:23,532 --> 00:43:24,521
Pick 'em up!
692
00:43:30,639 --> 00:43:33,130
- # Mock- #
- # Sí #
693
00:43:33,175 --> 00:43:34,665
- # -ing- #
- # Sí#
694
00:43:34,710 --> 00:43:36,769
- # -bird #
- # Sí #
695
00:43:36,812 --> 00:43:39,042
Harry and Lloyd:
# Sí #
696
00:43:46,689 --> 00:43:49,487
You want an atomic
pepper, Mr. Mentaliano?
697
00:43:51,260 --> 00:43:54,127
Nah, you guys
go ahead.
698
00:43:54,163 --> 00:43:56,393
I'll do it
if you will, Lloyd.
699
00:43:56,432 --> 00:43:58,127
Okay.
You go first.
700
00:43:58,167 --> 00:43:59,759
No, huh-uh, no,
you go first.
701
00:43:59,802 --> 00:44:01,770
- No, you go first.
- No, you go first.
702
00:44:01,804 --> 00:44:04,796
- No, you go first.
- I always go first!
703
00:44:04,840 --> 00:44:07,172
Why don't you guys
both stop acting
704
00:44:07,209 --> 00:44:08,836
like a couple
of pussies
705
00:44:08,878 --> 00:44:11,108
and go at
the same time, huh?
706
00:44:13,382 --> 00:44:16,112
- That sounds like a dare, Harry.
- It's a double-dare.
707
00:44:16,152 --> 00:44:17,744
Yeah, okay,
you're on.
708
00:44:24,927 --> 00:44:28,886
Huh. It's not so bad.
709
00:44:28,931 --> 00:44:30,523
Yeah. It's more
tingly than hot.
710
00:44:30,566 --> 00:44:33,228
Yeah.
711
00:44:33,269 --> 00:44:35,134
Agh!
712
00:44:43,679 --> 00:44:46,170
Uh, if you fellas
would excuse me,
713
00:44:46,215 --> 00:44:48,149
I've got to use
the phone.
714
00:44:48,184 --> 00:44:50,175
Enjoy your meal,
guys.
715
00:44:52,321 --> 00:44:54,289
Here, Lloyd,
this helps!
716
00:44:54,323 --> 00:44:56,314
Here here.
717
00:44:56,358 --> 00:44:57,882
It-
it works good.
718
00:44:57,927 --> 00:44:59,918
Ugh!
719
00:45:05,201 --> 00:45:08,864
Yeah, it's Mental.
I'm just sitting down
720
00:45:08,904 --> 00:45:11,771
- to a nice meal with our boys.
- Well, how nice for you.
721
00:45:11,807 --> 00:45:14,298
Don't forget that your bread plate
is on the left!
722
00:45:14,343 --> 00:45:17,335
Look, I can't have these guys
running around Aspen.
723
00:45:17,379 --> 00:45:19,904
Don't worry. They ain't gonna be
runnin' around nowhere
724
00:45:19,949 --> 00:45:23,146
after I dump a little rat poison
in their Shirley Temple.
725
00:45:27,656 --> 00:45:31,319
- Good good.
- Okay, that's good.
726
00:45:31,360 --> 00:45:33,828
Here he comes.
Here he comes.
727
00:45:34,830 --> 00:45:36,320
Feeling better,
girls?
728
00:45:36,365 --> 00:45:38,765
Yes, much better.
Thank you for asking.
729
00:45:38,801 --> 00:45:42,601
# The other side of the mountain was all
that he could see, so! #
730
00:45:42,638 --> 00:45:45,607
# He went back over the mountain to see
what he could see, hey! #
731
00:45:45,641 --> 00:45:48,235
So why are you going
to Aspen? Vacation?
732
00:45:49,612 --> 00:45:51,807
Why don't you eat up
and we'll tell you?
733
00:45:53,349 --> 00:45:55,510
It just doesn't seem like
you packed much.
734
00:45:55,551 --> 00:45:58,611
All I saw was one bag
and that briefcase.
735
00:45:58,654 --> 00:46:00,952
Well, no no, the briefcase
isn't even ours.
736
00:46:00,990 --> 00:46:02,787
Some lady left it
at the airport.
737
00:46:02,825 --> 00:46:04,520
We're just bringing
it back to her.
738
00:46:04,560 --> 00:46:06,255
How's your burger?
739
00:46:08,030 --> 00:46:11,295
You mean, you don't
even know her?
740
00:46:16,872 --> 00:46:19,363
I mean,
741
00:46:19,408 --> 00:46:23,708
talk about being in the wrong place
at the wrong time.
742
00:46:23,746 --> 00:46:27,238
# The bear went over the mountain to see
what he could see, hey! #
743
00:46:27,283 --> 00:46:30,343
# The other side of the mountain was all
that he could see, so!
744
00:46:30,386 --> 00:46:33,378
# So he went back over the mountain to see
what he could see, hey! #
745
00:46:33,422 --> 00:46:35,947
# The other side of the mountain was all
the he could see! #
746
00:46:54,677 --> 00:46:56,941
Are you okay, man?
It was just a goof.
747
00:46:56,979 --> 00:46:59,311
Oh, my ulcer!
748
00:46:59,348 --> 00:47:01,839
Quick!
My pills!
749
00:47:01,884 --> 00:47:04,352
Maybe somebody should
call an ambulance.
750
00:47:04,386 --> 00:47:05,683
Look, uh,
you get the pills.
751
00:47:05,721 --> 00:47:07,518
Don't worry.
I know CPR.
752
00:47:07,556 --> 00:47:08,716
I'll get
the pills.
753
00:47:08,757 --> 00:47:10,782
Out with the bad air,
in with the good.
754
00:47:10,826 --> 00:47:13,056
- Out with the bad air-
- Get off!
755
00:47:17,366 --> 00:47:18,628
Ugh!
756
00:47:20,969 --> 00:47:23,403
Agh, don't!
Don't don't!
757
00:47:23,439 --> 00:47:24,736
Back back!
758
00:47:24,773 --> 00:47:28,368
This is a lot easier
if you just lay back.
759
00:47:28,410 --> 00:47:30,776
- Here.
- He's resisting me!
760
00:47:30,813 --> 00:47:34,044
Here.
Here we go, here we go.
761
00:47:34,083 --> 00:47:35,983
- Pills!
- There you go! There you go.
762
00:47:36,018 --> 00:47:37,918
- Pills are good!
- Take 'em down.
763
00:47:37,953 --> 00:47:39,978
- Pills are good!
- Drink 'em down.
764
00:47:40,022 --> 00:47:41,751
There you go.
765
00:47:41,790 --> 00:47:43,655
- There you go, big guy.
- That's better!
766
00:47:43,692 --> 00:47:45,660
You want some ketchup
and mustard?
767
00:47:45,694 --> 00:47:48,754
That helped us.
768
00:47:50,833 --> 00:47:54,291
Son of a bitch!
769
00:48:03,746 --> 00:48:05,805
Check, please.
770
00:48:08,851 --> 00:48:10,443
I can't
believe it.
771
00:48:10,486 --> 00:48:12,784
Life's a fragile
thing, Harr.
772
00:48:12,821 --> 00:48:15,722
One minute you're
chewing on a burger,
773
00:48:15,758 --> 00:48:18,022
the next minute
you're dead meat.
774
00:48:18,060 --> 00:48:20,494
But he blamed me.
You heard him.
775
00:48:20,529 --> 00:48:22,394
Those were
his last words.
776
00:48:23,899 --> 00:48:26,060
Not if you count
the gurgling sound.
777
00:48:30,072 --> 00:48:32,939
- You mean he was poisoned?
- No doubt about it.
778
00:48:32,975 --> 00:48:36,103
We found these
next to the body.
779
00:48:36,145 --> 00:48:38,045
- Sir.
- Yeah?
780
00:48:38,080 --> 00:48:40,810
Waitress says he came in with
a couple of younger guys.
781
00:48:40,849 --> 00:48:44,148
Now they're the ones who called the
ambulance, and then they hit the road.
782
00:48:44,186 --> 00:48:46,916
- Get any idea where they were going?
- We just received a report
783
00:48:46,955 --> 00:48:49,947
that they were seen headed west on I-80
towards Colorado.
784
00:48:49,992 --> 00:48:52,085
Did you get a make
on the vehicle?
785
00:48:53,862 --> 00:48:55,523
Uh, yes, sir.
786
00:48:55,564 --> 00:49:00,001
They're driving
an '84... sheepdog.
787
00:49:16,785 --> 00:49:18,878
# Take... #
788
00:49:18,921 --> 00:49:24,587
# Take a picture,
take a little time #
789
00:49:24,626 --> 00:49:26,890
# No need to dig
through the dumpster #
790
00:49:26,929 --> 00:49:30,456
# For all the stuff you thought that you'd left
behind... #
791
00:49:33,168 --> 00:49:35,534
# Take my car #
792
00:49:35,571 --> 00:49:38,199
# Drive it
to the outside world #
793
00:49:38,240 --> 00:49:42,574
# Take it far,
farther now from me #
794
00:49:42,611 --> 00:49:43,873
# Take it all #
795
00:49:43,912 --> 00:49:46,676
# Happy, girl,
the fact is #
796
00:49:46,715 --> 00:49:48,580
# Take my heart #
797
00:49:48,617 --> 00:49:51,882
# Take take
take me apart. #
798
00:49:57,626 --> 00:49:59,059
Skis, huh?
799
00:49:59,094 --> 00:50:00,584
That's right.
800
00:50:00,629 --> 00:50:02,597
Great.
801
00:50:02,631 --> 00:50:04,861
They yours?
802
00:50:10,572 --> 00:50:12,335
Both of 'em?
803
00:50:14,109 --> 00:50:15,974
Yeah.
804
00:50:16,011 --> 00:50:19,845
Cool.
805
00:50:22,117 --> 00:50:24,585
Um, excuse me,
but you're, uh...
806
00:50:24,620 --> 00:50:26,918
you're spraying
everywhere.
807
00:51:18,840 --> 00:51:22,708
Oh, man, you gotta be shitting me.
808
00:51:22,744 --> 00:51:25,508
If it ain't
my old friend!
809
00:51:27,049 --> 00:51:30,485
And right on time.
810
00:51:39,328 --> 00:51:42,593
That's a lot of luggage
for a little vacation.
811
00:51:42,631 --> 00:51:44,656
I'm moving to Aspen.
812
00:51:44,700 --> 00:51:47,726
I've got to get away from my boyfriend.
He's such a klutz.
813
00:51:47,769 --> 00:51:50,567
Plus, my astrologer told me that
I really should stay away
814
00:51:50,606 --> 00:51:52,904
from accident-prone guys,
so, you know.
815
00:51:52,941 --> 00:51:54,568
Oh, well,
you know, I-
816
00:51:57,779 --> 00:52:01,010
Here. It's a little loose.
You might want to-
817
00:52:01,049 --> 00:52:04,143
- Mm. Thank you.
- Oh, no. Hey, no, allow me.
818
00:52:04,186 --> 00:52:06,154
I've got
a thing of-
819
00:52:06,188 --> 00:52:08,622
here.
Got 'em right here. Right here.
820
00:52:14,162 --> 00:52:16,323
Thank you.
821
00:52:16,365 --> 00:52:19,334
Sure. You know, I'm heading up
to Aspen myself.
822
00:52:19,368 --> 00:52:21,063
Maybe we could,
you know, meet up,
823
00:52:21,103 --> 00:52:23,128
have some hot chocolate
or something.
824
00:52:24,373 --> 00:52:26,864
Sure, why not?
You seem harmless.
825
00:52:26,908 --> 00:52:28,273
I'm going to
give you my number.
826
00:52:28,310 --> 00:52:30,141
- Let me find a pen though.
- Great!
827
00:52:30,178 --> 00:52:32,339
- Let's see.
- That's- ah!
828
00:52:32,381 --> 00:52:34,645
- I know I have one in here somewhere.
- Look, why don't you
829
00:52:34,683 --> 00:52:36,617
just tell it to me?
I got a really good memory.
830
00:52:36,652 --> 00:52:38,813
- Well, the number's 555...
- 555.
831
00:52:38,854 --> 00:52:41,846
905- wait a minute.
That's my old number.
832
00:52:41,890 --> 00:52:44,120
That is so weird how
your mind just goes blank.
833
00:52:44,159 --> 00:52:46,992
For God's sakes, just
give me the damn number!
834
00:52:47,029 --> 00:52:50,624
Okay, look, uh, you gonna get pushy,
forget about it.
835
00:52:57,139 --> 00:52:59,300
Find a happy place.
836
00:52:59,341 --> 00:53:02,401
Find a happy place.
Find a happy place.
837
00:53:02,444 --> 00:53:05,004
I'll show you
a happy place.
838
00:53:06,014 --> 00:53:08,949
Here's your happy place.
839
00:53:44,352 --> 00:53:46,445
Move those cars!
Move it! Move it!
840
00:53:52,761 --> 00:53:54,695
Go around, man.
Go around.
841
00:53:54,730 --> 00:53:57,426
More flags over here!
842
00:53:57,466 --> 00:53:59,400
All right,
any sign of them yet?
843
00:53:59,434 --> 00:54:01,425
No, sir, but we're
expecting them shortly.
844
00:54:01,470 --> 00:54:04,598
A motorist saw a pooch about 30 miles
back headed this way.
845
00:54:09,144 --> 00:54:12,773
Look, I told you what happened, okay?
So just drop it.
846
00:54:12,814 --> 00:54:14,941
Yeah, okay. Sure thing, Lloyd.
Sure thing.
847
00:54:14,983 --> 00:54:17,451
I promise not
to mention another word
848
00:54:17,486 --> 00:54:19,954
about you being
in a bathroom
849
00:54:19,988 --> 00:54:21,956
with a 6'4" trucker
with his pants down.
850
00:54:32,134 --> 00:54:34,500
Hey, look.
We're almost in Colorado.
851
00:54:34,536 --> 00:54:36,766
What do you say
we change seats?
852
00:54:36,805 --> 00:54:39,035
I've been driving
for nine straight hours.
853
00:54:39,074 --> 00:54:42,043
I don't have the energy
to start a new state.
854
00:54:42,077 --> 00:54:43,977
Why should I do you
any favors?
855
00:54:44,012 --> 00:54:47,072
I'll let you kiss me.
856
00:54:47,115 --> 00:54:49,083
I swear...
857
00:54:49,117 --> 00:54:51,381
I'm gonna-
I will take your-
858
00:54:51,419 --> 00:54:53,979
I'm- I swear to God
I'm gonna take your-
859
00:54:54,022 --> 00:54:56,855
- Aw, come on-
- Don't touch me.
860
00:54:56,892 --> 00:54:59,122
Oh, okay.
861
00:55:02,831 --> 00:55:05,561
I'm done.
Okay, enough.
862
00:55:18,413 --> 00:55:21,041
Hey, guys.
Whoa, Big Gulps, huh?
863
00:55:21,082 --> 00:55:22,777
All right.
864
00:55:22,818 --> 00:55:25,446
Well, see you later.
865
00:55:27,389 --> 00:55:29,323
Hey, Harry,
866
00:55:29,357 --> 00:55:31,257
I got some beef jerk-
867
00:55:35,831 --> 00:55:39,494
Some people just weren't cut out
for life on the road.
868
00:55:41,837 --> 00:55:45,034
# Here you go,
way too fast #
869
00:55:45,073 --> 00:55:47,507
# Don't slow down,
you're gonna crash #
870
00:55:47,542 --> 00:55:50,875
# You should watch,
watch your step #
871
00:55:50,912 --> 00:55:53,210
# Don't look out,
gonna break your neck #
872
00:55:53,248 --> 00:55:56,240
# So shut,
shut your mouth #
873
00:55:56,284 --> 00:55:58,912
# 'Cause I'm not
listening anyhow #
874
00:55:58,954 --> 00:56:01,821
# I've had enough,
enough of you #
875
00:56:01,857 --> 00:56:04,826
# Enough to last
a lifetime through #
876
00:56:04,860 --> 00:56:06,589
# With you #
877
00:56:06,628 --> 00:56:10,655
# You. #
878
00:56:12,000 --> 00:56:13,934
Hey!
879
00:56:13,969 --> 00:56:17,564
I was wondering when
you were gonna get up.
880
00:56:17,606 --> 00:56:19,403
Ha!
881
00:56:19,441 --> 00:56:22,376
Well, how long
have I been out?
882
00:56:23,545 --> 00:56:26,673
I'd say
a good five hours.
883
00:56:31,253 --> 00:56:34,051
Huh! I expected
the Rocky Mountains
884
00:56:34,089 --> 00:56:37,217
to be a little
rockier than this.
885
00:56:37,259 --> 00:56:40,057
I was thinking
the same thing.
886
00:56:40,095 --> 00:56:43,587
That John Denver's
full of shit, man.
887
00:56:47,402 --> 00:56:49,632
I'm only human, Harry!
888
00:56:49,671 --> 00:56:53,107
Anybody can
make a mistake.
889
00:56:53,141 --> 00:56:56,508
Come on,
stop being a baby!
890
00:56:56,544 --> 00:56:59,069
So we backtracked
a tad!
891
00:56:59,114 --> 00:57:01,014
A tad?!
892
00:57:01,049 --> 00:57:03,142
A tad, Lloyd?
893
00:57:03,184 --> 00:57:06,244
You drove almost
1/6 of the way
894
00:57:06,288 --> 00:57:09,621
across the country
in the wrong direction!
895
00:57:11,393 --> 00:57:13,918
Now we don't have enough money
to get to Aspen!
896
00:57:13,962 --> 00:57:15,623
We don't have enough
money to get home!
897
00:57:15,664 --> 00:57:18,155
We don't have enough
money to eat!
898
00:57:18,199 --> 00:57:20,827
We don't have enough
money to sleep!
899
00:57:22,103 --> 00:57:24,401
Well, it's not gonna
do us any good
900
00:57:24,439 --> 00:57:26,270
to sit here
whining about it.
901
00:57:26,308 --> 00:57:28,401
We're in a hole.
902
00:57:28,443 --> 00:57:30,911
We're just going to have to
dig ourselves out.
903
00:57:32,447 --> 00:57:34,142
Okay, all right.
You're right.
904
00:57:34,182 --> 00:57:36,082
You're absolutely
right, Lloyd.
905
00:57:36,117 --> 00:57:38,415
Where're you going?
906
00:57:38,453 --> 00:57:42,150
Home. I'm walking home.
907
00:57:42,190 --> 00:57:46,684
Oh, well, pardon me,
Mr. Perfect!
908
00:57:46,728 --> 00:57:48,491
I guess I forgot
909
00:57:48,530 --> 00:57:51,158
that you never,
ever make a mistake!
910
00:58:15,156 --> 00:58:17,647
Harry!
911
00:58:17,692 --> 00:58:22,123
Harry!
912
00:58:22,163 --> 00:58:24,427
Harry!
Wait up!
913
00:58:39,014 --> 00:58:41,983
Got room for one more
if you still want to go to Aspen.
914
00:58:42,017 --> 00:58:44,144
Where did you
find that?
915
00:58:44,185 --> 00:58:46,710
Some kid
back in town.
916
00:58:46,755 --> 00:58:49,451
Traded the van for it
straight up.
917
00:58:49,491 --> 00:58:52,654
I can get 70 miles
to the gallon on this hog.
918
00:58:58,099 --> 00:59:00,533
You know, Lloyd,
just when I think
919
00:59:00,568 --> 00:59:04,095
you couldn't possibly
be any dumber,
920
00:59:04,139 --> 00:59:08,337
you go and do
something like this...
921
00:59:08,376 --> 00:59:12,210
and totally
redeem yourself!
922
00:59:15,483 --> 00:59:17,713
- Still wanna go to Aspen?
- Oh, yeah!
923
00:59:17,752 --> 00:59:21,415
- Okay, let's go, buddy!
- Super!
924
00:59:24,359 --> 00:59:28,295
- Lloyd, no! West! Go west, Lloyd!
- Oh! Oh, yeah.
925
00:59:37,172 --> 00:59:40,266
# Hey, Monday morning #
926
00:59:40,308 --> 00:59:43,709
# Is only for the brave #
927
00:59:43,745 --> 00:59:47,374
# And the blood flows
through my heart and veins #
928
00:59:47,415 --> 00:59:51,078
# Like sand as I shave #
929
00:59:51,119 --> 00:59:54,384
# And the wind outside #
930
00:59:54,422 --> 00:59:57,152
# And the taxi's ready... #
931
00:59:57,192 --> 01:00:00,161
# And the lonesome hum #
932
01:00:00,195 --> 01:00:02,493
# That comes
from my desk lamp #
933
01:00:02,530 --> 01:00:06,296
# Is where I find
my heaven #
934
01:00:06,334 --> 01:00:11,704
# It's where I find
my heaven... #
935
01:00:13,441 --> 01:00:15,841
I've got to-
I've got to stop
936
01:00:15,877 --> 01:00:18,072
to go to
the bathroom.
937
01:00:18,113 --> 01:00:20,513
Just go, man.
938
01:00:25,487 --> 01:00:27,717
That sure is warm.
939
01:00:32,127 --> 01:00:34,618
# It's where I find
my heaven #
940
01:00:34,662 --> 01:00:38,359
- # It's where I find my heaven #
- # Where I find my- #
941
01:00:38,399 --> 01:00:40,594
# It's where I find
my heaven... #
942
01:00:43,404 --> 01:00:47,135
# Heav... #
943
01:00:47,175 --> 01:00:51,976
# Heaven. #
944
01:01:28,917 --> 01:01:31,408
We're there.
945
01:01:38,893 --> 01:01:40,827
Got a little nippy
946
01:01:40,862 --> 01:01:43,831
going through
the pass back there.
947
01:01:46,267 --> 01:01:48,861
Lloyd:
Isn't this incredible?
948
01:01:48,903 --> 01:01:51,872
- What more could two single guys want?
- How about some food?
949
01:01:51,906 --> 01:01:54,875
I swallowed a big June bug
when we were driving.
950
01:01:54,909 --> 01:01:56,399
I'm not
really hungry.
951
01:01:56,444 --> 01:01:58,378
Well, I'm starving.
952
01:01:58,413 --> 01:02:01,507
Ho- Jeez, look at
the butt on that.
953
01:02:01,549 --> 01:02:03,608
Yeah.
954
01:02:03,651 --> 01:02:06,484
He must work out.
955
01:02:06,521 --> 01:02:08,580
Hey! Why don't we get busy
956
01:02:08,623 --> 01:02:10,488
and deliver
the briefcase to Mary?
957
01:02:10,525 --> 01:02:12,254
If I know her as well
as I think I do
958
01:02:12,293 --> 01:02:14,488
she'll invite us right in
for tea and strumpets.
959
01:02:14,529 --> 01:02:16,588
Good plan.
Where does she live?
960
01:02:16,631 --> 01:02:18,531
I don't know.
961
01:02:18,566 --> 01:02:21,228
What's her last name?
I'll look it up.
962
01:02:23,238 --> 01:02:26,730
You know, I don't
really recall.
963
01:02:26,774 --> 01:02:28,605
Starts with an "S."
964
01:02:28,643 --> 01:02:32,841
S-swim, Swamie,
S-slippy, Slappy,
965
01:02:32,880 --> 01:02:35,542
Slimin, Solmon,
Simin, Sal,
966
01:02:35,583 --> 01:02:36,743
Swenson, Swanson?
967
01:02:36,784 --> 01:02:38,581
Maybe it's on
the briefcase.
968
01:02:38,620 --> 01:02:40,485
Oh, yeah!
It's right here.
969
01:02:40,521 --> 01:02:42,921
Samsonite!
I was way off.
970
01:02:42,957 --> 01:02:45,221
I knew it started
with an "S" though.
971
01:02:46,661 --> 01:02:48,754
I'm not seeing
it here, Lloyd.
972
01:02:48,796 --> 01:02:51,060
She must be unlisted.
973
01:02:53,735 --> 01:02:55,703
Great.
974
01:02:55,737 --> 01:02:57,967
So what are we
supposed to do now?
975
01:03:01,542 --> 01:03:05,603
I can't feel my fi-fingers anymore.
976
01:03:05,647 --> 01:03:08,639
They're-they're-
they're numb.
977
01:03:10,351 --> 01:03:13,479
Ooh. Maybe you should
wear these extra gloves.
978
01:03:13,521 --> 01:03:16,456
My hands are starting
to get sweaty.
979
01:03:16,491 --> 01:03:19,688
Extra gloves?
980
01:03:19,727 --> 01:03:22,025
You've had this pair
981
01:03:22,063 --> 01:03:24,827
of extra gloves
this whole time?
982
01:03:26,467 --> 01:03:28,867
Yeah. We're in
the Rockies.
983
01:03:31,472 --> 01:03:33,235
I'm going to kill you.
984
01:03:34,442 --> 01:03:36,967
- What?
- I'm gonna kill you!
985
01:03:37,011 --> 01:03:40,310
- I'm gonna kill you, Lloyd!
- Calm down!
986
01:03:40,348 --> 01:03:41,872
Right now,
I'm gonna kill you!
987
01:03:41,916 --> 01:03:44,248
Harry, you got that crazy look
in your eye!
988
01:03:45,853 --> 01:03:49,812
I know what I'm going to do.
989
01:03:49,857 --> 01:03:51,984
- What are you doing?
- I'm going to do something
990
01:03:52,026 --> 01:03:54,551
I should have done
a long time ago.
991
01:03:55,563 --> 01:03:57,360
Don't do anything
foolish, Harry!
992
01:03:57,398 --> 01:03:59,730
What? Foolish?
This isn't foolish!
993
01:03:59,767 --> 01:04:02,065
I'm going to toss
this damn curse
994
01:04:02,103 --> 01:04:04,401
right into
that damn pond!
995
01:04:07,675 --> 01:04:10,872
- I'm going to do it!
- No, Harry!
996
01:04:12,814 --> 01:04:15,715
Harry!
997
01:04:15,750 --> 01:04:18,344
Your hands
are freezing!
998
01:04:20,822 --> 01:04:23,086
Harry, look!
999
01:04:23,124 --> 01:04:25,820
Look! Look!
1000
01:04:30,598 --> 01:04:32,896
Okay, here's the plan:
1001
01:04:32,934 --> 01:04:35,801
We borrow a few bucks-
just a small loan from the briefcase
1002
01:04:35,837 --> 01:04:38,863
- and we find some reasonable lodgings.
- Good plan.
1003
01:04:38,906 --> 01:04:41,602
And we'll keep track of all the money
we spend with IOUs.
1004
01:04:41,642 --> 01:04:43,872
We'll be meticulous,
right down to the last penny.
1005
01:04:43,911 --> 01:04:46,345
- Whatever we borrow, we pay back.
- Absolutely.
1006
01:04:46,381 --> 01:04:48,781
- We're good for it.
- Our word is our bond.
1007
01:04:50,485 --> 01:04:52,476
This is
the Hotel Danbury
1008
01:04:52,520 --> 01:04:54,488
Presidential Suite,
gentlemen,
1009
01:04:54,522 --> 01:04:56,513
normally reserved
for royalty,
1010
01:04:56,557 --> 01:04:58,354
visiting dignitaries,
1011
01:04:58,393 --> 01:05:00,793
illustrious stars
of stage and screen.
1012
01:05:00,828 --> 01:05:04,355
We have shortly coming the Emperor
and Empress of Japan,
1013
01:05:04,399 --> 01:05:07,368
and of course, Princess Charles and Di
when they were together
1014
01:05:07,402 --> 01:05:09,393
used to frequent
the hotel constantly.
1015
01:05:09,437 --> 01:05:10,927
We'll take it!
1016
01:05:19,947 --> 01:05:23,542
# I believe
in miracles, baby #
1017
01:05:23,584 --> 01:05:26,985
# Since you came along,
you sexy thing #
1018
01:05:27,021 --> 01:05:29,012
# You sexy thing, you #
1019
01:05:29,056 --> 01:05:32,150
# I believe
in miracles, baby #
1020
01:05:32,193 --> 01:05:34,787
# Since you came along #
1021
01:05:34,829 --> 01:05:39,061
- # You sexy thing #
- # You sexy thing, you... #
1022
01:05:40,568 --> 01:05:42,297
There you go.
1023
01:05:43,971 --> 01:05:49,603
- There you go.
- Thank you, sir.
1024
01:05:49,644 --> 01:05:52,044
There you go.
1025
01:05:53,948 --> 01:05:55,813
Hi.
1026
01:05:57,618 --> 01:06:00,052
Narrator on TV:
Rain brought them to him.
1027
01:06:00,087 --> 01:06:01,952
Girl on TV:
My mother was Sarah Carver.
1028
01:06:01,989 --> 01:06:04,184
Narrator:
Although at the time, he wasn't sure
1029
01:06:04,225 --> 01:06:06,489
he wanted to accept the gift.
1030
01:06:06,527 --> 01:06:08,893
Girl on TV:
Nick, do you think he'll let us stay?
1031
01:06:08,930 --> 01:06:10,955
Nick on TV:
No, this place is ugly, anyway.
1032
01:06:10,998 --> 01:06:14,092
You and me,
we 're a family.
1033
01:06:14,135 --> 01:06:16,660
Man:
I promise never to give you away.
1034
01:06:16,704 --> 01:06:19,537
And no one's
ever going to break us apart.
1035
01:06:19,574 --> 01:06:22,737
At Pacific Bell, we believe
that's pretty special.
1036
01:06:22,777 --> 01:06:26,071
- Wow! Boy, this is livin', huh?
- Yeah.
1037
01:06:26,113 --> 01:06:28,638
- What's on next?
- I don't know.
1038
01:06:28,683 --> 01:06:30,913
Let me look it up.
1039
01:06:30,952 --> 01:06:32,817
Ah!
1040
01:06:32,854 --> 01:06:34,879
Lloyd, you okay?
1041
01:06:34,922 --> 01:06:37,015
Harry, it's Mary!
1042
01:06:37,058 --> 01:06:38,855
It's who?
1043
01:06:38,893 --> 01:06:41,020
Mary with
the briefcase.
1044
01:06:41,062 --> 01:06:44,225
Mary Swanson.
1045
01:06:44,265 --> 01:06:46,665
Swanson!
1046
01:06:46,701 --> 01:06:49,898
- Wool hast anool-
- "Host annual. "
1047
01:06:49,937 --> 01:06:53,634
- Host anewl- annual-
- Annual.
1048
01:06:53,674 --> 01:06:55,471
"Annual meeting of... "
1049
01:06:55,510 --> 01:06:57,478
t-t-t-heh...
1050
01:06:57,512 --> 01:06:59,036
t-he- t-he-
1051
01:06:59,080 --> 01:07:00,945
The.
1052
01:07:00,982 --> 01:07:04,042
- "The Inter-"
- Yeah. It's a big one.
1053
01:07:04,085 --> 01:07:07,111
"International Preservation Society
tomorrow night. "
1054
01:07:10,057 --> 01:07:11,786
Well, come on,
Cinderella.
1055
01:07:11,826 --> 01:07:14,693
We've got to get you
ready for the ball!
1056
01:07:21,636 --> 01:07:25,094
# Pretty woman,
walking down the street #
1057
01:07:25,139 --> 01:07:28,905
# Pretty woman,
the kind I like to meet #
1058
01:07:28,943 --> 01:07:31,503
# Pretty woman #
1059
01:07:31,546 --> 01:07:35,209
# I don't believe you,
you're not the truth #
1060
01:07:35,249 --> 01:07:39,515
# No one could look
as good as you... #
1061
01:07:41,689 --> 01:07:43,213
# Mercy! #
1062
01:07:46,727 --> 01:07:50,595
# Pretty woman,
won't you pardon me? #
1063
01:07:50,631 --> 01:07:54,567
# Pretty woman,
I couldn't help but see #
1064
01:07:54,602 --> 01:07:57,162
# Pretty woman #
1065
01:07:57,204 --> 01:08:00,970
# That you look lovely
as can be #
1066
01:08:01,008 --> 01:08:06,844
# Are you lonely
just like me? #
1067
01:08:13,321 --> 01:08:17,257
# Pretty woman,
stop awhile #
1068
01:08:17,291 --> 01:08:20,988
# Pretty woman,
talk awhile #
1069
01:08:21,028 --> 01:08:27,957
# Pretty woman,
give your smile to me #
1070
01:08:28,002 --> 01:08:32,166
# Pretty woman,
yeah yeah yeah #
1071
01:08:32,206 --> 01:08:35,903
# Pretty woman, look my way #
1072
01:08:35,943 --> 01:08:40,505
# Pretty woman,
say you'll stay with me... #
1073
01:08:42,383 --> 01:08:45,580
# 'Cause I need you #
1074
01:08:45,620 --> 01:08:48,885
# I'll treat you right... #
1075
01:08:48,923 --> 01:08:52,882
# Come with me, baby #
1076
01:08:52,927 --> 01:08:55,862
# Be mine tonight... #
1077
01:08:55,896 --> 01:08:58,262
Yeah!
1078
01:09:01,135 --> 01:09:02,169
# Pretty woman. #
1079
01:09:07,174 --> 01:09:09,165
Thanks, Barn.
There you go.
1080
01:09:09,210 --> 01:09:11,201
Thank you, sir.
1081
01:09:27,862 --> 01:09:29,386
Okay okay okay.
1082
01:09:29,430 --> 01:09:30,954
- Ha!
- Cripes!
1083
01:09:30,998 --> 01:09:33,193
Yes! Yes! Yes!
1084
01:09:39,907 --> 01:09:42,671
- Time out!
- Okay.
1085
01:09:42,710 --> 01:09:46,146
Excuse me. Gentlemen, this is
a $500-a-plate dinner.
1086
01:09:46,180 --> 01:09:49,672
- Good night.
- Oh, 500- oh, okay. No problem.
1087
01:09:49,717 --> 01:09:52,743
Here. Put us down for-
put us down for four.
1088
01:09:52,787 --> 01:09:54,948
In case we
want seconds.
1089
01:10:01,328 --> 01:10:03,853
Jesus Christ.
It's them.
1090
01:10:03,898 --> 01:10:05,422
- Them who?
- Them,
1091
01:10:05,466 --> 01:10:08,128
the guys who
whacked Mental.
1092
01:10:09,170 --> 01:10:10,762
Can't you just
feel it, Harry?
1093
01:10:10,805 --> 01:10:12,432
This is our
big chance, man.
1094
01:10:12,473 --> 01:10:14,236
All we gotta do
1095
01:10:14,275 --> 01:10:16,743
is show a little class,
a little sophistication,
1096
01:10:16,777 --> 01:10:18,802
and we're in like
a dirty shirt.
1097
01:10:18,846 --> 01:10:21,280
That's no problem, Lloyd.
We can be classy and sophistic-
1098
01:10:21,315 --> 01:10:23,283
oh, look at the funbags
on that hosehound.
1099
01:10:23,317 --> 01:10:25,785
I'd like to eat her liver with
some fava beans
1100
01:10:25,820 --> 01:10:27,788
and a nice
bottle of Chianti.
1101
01:10:30,191 --> 01:10:33,024
Come on, let's go get a couple bowls
of loudmouth soup.
1102
01:10:33,060 --> 01:10:34,789
Yeah.
1103
01:10:34,829 --> 01:10:36,922
Hey, bartender,
1104
01:10:36,964 --> 01:10:39,159
- two martinis, please.
- Yes, sir. Right away.
1105
01:10:39,200 --> 01:10:42,169
Ladies and gentlemen,
can I have your attention, please?
1106
01:10:42,203 --> 01:10:44,296
The Aspen
Preservation Society
1107
01:10:44,338 --> 01:10:46,363
is the world's
foremost defender
1108
01:10:46,407 --> 01:10:49,399
of 23 endangered
species,
1109
01:10:49,443 --> 01:10:51,934
and it is with
tremendous honor
1110
01:10:51,979 --> 01:10:54,743
that we're able to bring
Mr. Swanson forward
1111
01:10:54,782 --> 01:10:57,148
to introduce us
to the 24th. Everybody-
1112
01:10:57,184 --> 01:10:59,118
Karl.
1113
01:10:59,153 --> 01:11:01,314
Thank you, Nick.
1114
01:11:03,357 --> 01:11:05,291
Thank you.
1115
01:11:05,326 --> 01:11:07,123
Ladies and gentlemen,
1116
01:11:07,161 --> 01:11:10,153
I give you
the Icelandic snow owl.
1117
01:11:17,838 --> 01:11:21,296
These magnificent specimens
constitute one seventh
1118
01:11:21,342 --> 01:11:24,175
of the snow owl population
left on the planet.
1119
01:11:24,211 --> 01:11:27,146
And God willing,
with your help
1120
01:11:27,181 --> 01:11:29,240
and that of
the Society's,
1121
01:11:29,283 --> 01:11:32,446
these wonderful creatures
will flourish once more.
1122
01:11:32,486 --> 01:11:35,683
Thank you again
and enjoy your evening.
1123
01:11:38,292 --> 01:11:40,522
Can I have
some pistachios, please?
1124
01:11:42,463 --> 01:11:44,328
And another one
of those.
1125
01:11:44,365 --> 01:11:46,765
Lloyd, what are you doing?
Would you calm down?
1126
01:11:46,801 --> 01:11:49,269
I've never seen you
so nervous.
1127
01:11:49,303 --> 01:11:53,034
Keep an eye on 'em, Shay.
Keep a close eye.
1128
01:11:53,073 --> 01:11:55,234
I'm ready for
a commitment, Harry.
1129
01:11:55,276 --> 01:11:58,109
The first time
I set eyes on Mary Swanson,
1130
01:11:58,145 --> 01:12:01,808
I just got that old-fashioned
romantic feeling
1131
01:12:01,849 --> 01:12:04,113
where I'd do anything
to bone her.
1132
01:12:04,151 --> 01:12:06,244
That's a special
feeling, Lloyd.
1133
01:12:06,287 --> 01:12:08,278
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
1134
01:12:08,322 --> 01:12:11,382
Oh my,
there she is.
1135
01:12:11,425 --> 01:12:13,791
Wow! You weren't
kidding, Lloyd.
1136
01:12:13,828 --> 01:12:16,490
She's an angel!
1137
01:12:17,498 --> 01:12:19,261
Well, what are
you waiting for?
1138
01:12:19,300 --> 01:12:22,133
Get over there
and talk to her.
1139
01:12:25,973 --> 01:12:28,305
She's just going to think
I'm some kind of a psycho
1140
01:12:28,342 --> 01:12:30,572
when she finds out
how far I came just to see her!
1141
01:12:30,611 --> 01:12:32,476
You know what you have?!
Her briefcase!
1142
01:12:32,513 --> 01:12:35,505
She's gonna be
thrilled to see you.
1143
01:12:35,549 --> 01:12:38,848
Wait.
I have an idea.
1144
01:12:40,120 --> 01:12:42,452
Why don't you go over
1145
01:12:42,489 --> 01:12:44,423
and introduce yourself?
1146
01:12:44,458 --> 01:12:46,426
And that way,
you can build me up
1147
01:12:46,460 --> 01:12:48,428
so I won't have to
brag about myself later.
1148
01:12:48,462 --> 01:12:50,396
Tell her I'm rich
1149
01:12:50,431 --> 01:12:52,899
and, uh,
I'm good-looking
1150
01:12:52,933 --> 01:12:54,958
and, uh, I have
a rapist wit.
1151
01:12:55,002 --> 01:12:57,061
No, I don't know.
I don't think I could- no.
1152
01:12:57,104 --> 01:12:59,868
- Come on, please.
- No, I'm not-
1153
01:12:59,907 --> 01:13:03,001
- Please! Please!
- Okay okay okay. Stop.
1154
01:13:03,043 --> 01:13:04,943
What are you gonna do?
1155
01:13:04,979 --> 01:13:07,243
I'm going to
hang by the bar,
1156
01:13:07,281 --> 01:13:10,648
- put out the vibe.
- Okay.
1157
01:13:21,328 --> 01:13:23,728
Nice set of hooters
you got there.
1158
01:13:26,033 --> 01:13:29,298
- I beg your pardon?
- The owls, they're beautiful.
1159
01:13:33,040 --> 01:13:35,008
Yeah.
1160
01:13:35,042 --> 01:13:36,976
Are you
a bird lover?
1161
01:13:37,011 --> 01:13:39,502
Me? Oh, no.
Well, I used to have a parakeet-
1162
01:13:39,546 --> 01:13:42,447
- Ah.
- -but now my main area of expertise
1163
01:13:42,483 --> 01:13:44,974
is, uh, canines-
1164
01:13:45,019 --> 01:13:47,146
"dogs"
to the layperson.
1165
01:13:48,155 --> 01:13:50,350
Thanks.
1166
01:13:51,358 --> 01:13:54,327
I love dogs too.
1167
01:13:54,361 --> 01:13:56,625
- So how are you involved with them?
- Oh, you know,
1168
01:13:56,664 --> 01:13:59,633
I've trained them, bathed them,
clipped them.
1169
01:13:59,667 --> 01:14:01,430
- I've even bred them.
- Oh, really?
1170
01:14:01,468 --> 01:14:03,436
- Any unusual breeding?
- No.
1171
01:14:03,470 --> 01:14:05,529
Mostly just doggy-style.
1172
01:14:05,572 --> 01:14:08,905
One time,
we successfully mated
1173
01:14:08,943 --> 01:14:11,309
a bulldog
with a shih-tzu.
1174
01:14:11,345 --> 01:14:14,246
Really?
That's weird.
1175
01:14:14,281 --> 01:14:16,909
Yeah. We-
we called it a bullshit.
1176
01:14:28,062 --> 01:14:30,360
Oh, I'm- anyway,
the real reason
1177
01:14:30,397 --> 01:14:32,558
I came over here
was to-
1178
01:14:32,599 --> 01:14:35,534
I've got to introduce you
to a buddy of mine.
1179
01:14:35,569 --> 01:14:39,027
I don't believe I've met your friend.
1180
01:14:39,073 --> 01:14:41,564
Well, actually, we haven't been
properly introduced.
1181
01:14:41,608 --> 01:14:44,372
- My name is Mary Swanson.
- Hi, Harry Dunne.
1182
01:14:44,411 --> 01:14:47,141
Hi. Nice to meet you.
This is my stepmother Helen.
1183
01:14:47,181 --> 01:14:49,445
Hi. Harry Dunne.
Pleasure to meet you both.
1184
01:14:49,483 --> 01:14:51,678
Mm-hmm. Well,
I saw you come in.
1185
01:14:51,719 --> 01:14:54,017
I was hoping I'd get
a chance to meet you.
1186
01:14:54,054 --> 01:14:58,252
- You were? Really?
- Yes! That tuxedo, it's fabulous!
1187
01:14:58,292 --> 01:15:01,090
Really. I love a man
with a sense of humor,
1188
01:15:01,128 --> 01:15:03,995
and so does Mary.
It's hysterical!
1189
01:15:04,031 --> 01:15:05,589
- Really?
- Oh, yes.
1190
01:15:05,632 --> 01:15:08,624
Oh. Anyway, um,
about my friend-
1191
01:15:08,669 --> 01:15:12,002
What are you doing tomorrow?
I believe that Mary
1192
01:15:12,039 --> 01:15:13,700
is looking for someone
to hit the slopes with.
1193
01:15:13,741 --> 01:15:15,470
She- what? Huh?
1194
01:15:15,509 --> 01:15:18,444
Helen, you're
embarrassing me.
1195
01:15:18,479 --> 01:15:20,447
Well, you are.
I mean, after all,
1196
01:15:20,481 --> 01:15:22,608
the snow's going to be gone
in a couple of weeks.
1197
01:15:22,649 --> 01:15:24,514
and, well, this may be
your last chance.
1198
01:15:24,551 --> 01:15:26,644
Poor thing, she never
gets a chance to get out.
1199
01:15:26,687 --> 01:15:29,349
Well, what do you say, Mr. Dunne?
Are you available?
1200
01:15:29,390 --> 01:15:31,688
Well, I don't know.
See, my friend-
1201
01:15:31,725 --> 01:15:33,590
Oh, forget your friend
for one day.
1202
01:15:33,627 --> 01:15:36,721
I think you kids'll have
a wonderful time. What do you say?
1203
01:15:36,764 --> 01:15:38,994
Well, you know,
I don't know, you know.
1204
01:15:39,033 --> 01:15:41,467
You know, the thing-
part of- sure.
1205
01:15:41,502 --> 01:15:44,630
What time?
Ahem-
1206
01:15:48,042 --> 01:15:50,533
How come you didn't
bring her over?
1207
01:15:50,577 --> 01:15:52,545
Relax.
You're golden.
1208
01:15:52,579 --> 01:15:55,013
I got you a date with her tomorrow.
1209
01:15:56,617 --> 01:15:59,051
- What- I- this-
- Yeah.
1210
01:15:59,086 --> 01:16:01,350
- I love you, man.
- Okay okay.
1211
01:16:01,388 --> 01:16:03,219
- You're kissing me.
- I love you.
1212
01:16:03,257 --> 01:16:05,725
- I love you!
- You're kissing me. Lloyd!
1213
01:16:08,128 --> 01:16:10,756
This calls for
a little of the bubbly!
1214
01:16:10,798 --> 01:16:13,028
- You're going to be my best man, Harr.
- Oh, good.
1215
01:16:13,067 --> 01:16:14,625
- I promise.
- Thank you.
1216
01:16:14,668 --> 01:16:16,636
You have just
earned yourself a seat
1217
01:16:16,670 --> 01:16:20,629
at the head table, pal.
And we already got the tuxes.
1218
01:16:27,481 --> 01:16:29,813
Gracious sakes!
1219
01:16:29,850 --> 01:16:33,513
- Good grief!
- Boy, this party really died.
1220
01:16:40,624 --> 01:16:43,115
Hey, maybe it was
a coincidence.
1221
01:16:43,159 --> 01:16:45,684
Hey, maybe it was a coincidence.
1222
01:16:45,729 --> 01:16:49,187
It was a message, Shay,
pure and simple.
1223
01:16:49,232 --> 01:16:51,427
I mean, we killed
their bird.
1224
01:16:51,468 --> 01:16:54,494
Now they killed
one of ours.
1225
01:16:56,439 --> 01:16:58,498
How could anybody
whack a bird with a cork?
1226
01:16:58,541 --> 01:17:00,839
These guys aren't
just anybody.
1227
01:17:00,877 --> 01:17:03,937
They're good.
1228
01:17:09,819 --> 01:17:12,151
Mary Christmas.
1229
01:17:12,188 --> 01:17:14,952
Mrs. Mary Christmas.
1230
01:17:16,526 --> 01:17:19,927
- Kinda catchy, huh, Harr?
- Yeah yeah, that sounds nice.
1231
01:17:19,963 --> 01:17:23,364
But, Lloyd, don't you think you might be
jumping the gun a little bit?
1232
01:17:23,400 --> 01:17:25,334
I mean, you know,
who knows?
1233
01:17:25,368 --> 01:17:27,233
You know, maybe,
once you get to know her
1234
01:17:27,270 --> 01:17:29,602
you'll find out
that she's not your type.
1235
01:17:31,675 --> 01:17:33,438
Hey!
1236
01:17:33,476 --> 01:17:36,639
Don't you ever
say that again!
1237
01:17:37,714 --> 01:17:39,705
She is the love
of my life!
1238
01:17:39,749 --> 01:17:42,183
The blood in my veins!
1239
01:17:42,218 --> 01:17:43,913
We belong together...
1240
01:17:43,953 --> 01:17:46,251
till the mountains
fall into the sea,
1241
01:17:46,289 --> 01:17:48,189
till the heavens
collide!
1242
01:17:48,224 --> 01:17:50,818
Or until I get sick of her
and need to move on.
1243
01:17:50,860 --> 01:17:54,296
- You hear me?!
- Okay okay okay okay. Just calm down.
1244
01:17:54,331 --> 01:17:56,196
Just calm down.
1245
01:17:56,232 --> 01:17:58,723
Okay.
1246
01:17:58,768 --> 01:18:01,828
Now...
1247
01:18:01,871 --> 01:18:04,339
let me
get this straight.
1248
01:18:04,374 --> 01:18:07,571
Lobby bar
in the lobby.
1249
01:18:07,610 --> 01:18:09,373
Yeah, and that's
what she said.
1250
01:18:09,412 --> 01:18:11,642
She'll meet you there
at 10:00 sharp.
1251
01:18:12,716 --> 01:18:14,843
- Okay.
- Okay.
1252
01:18:17,420 --> 01:18:19,650
Where're you going
in that get-up?
1253
01:18:21,324 --> 01:18:23,315
Oh. I- you know, I just thought,
you know,
1254
01:18:23,360 --> 01:18:25,453
when you'd be off making
your love connection
1255
01:18:25,495 --> 01:18:27,793
I'd be out trying my luck
on the slopes.
1256
01:18:27,831 --> 01:18:29,799
You mean you're gonna
go out in public
1257
01:18:29,833 --> 01:18:31,824
dressed in tights?
1258
01:18:31,868 --> 01:18:33,802
Oh no, these aren't
tights, Lloyd.
1259
01:18:33,837 --> 01:18:36,305
These are fashionable
Euro-trash ski trousers.
1260
01:18:36,339 --> 01:18:38,637
Pretty revealing.
1261
01:18:39,642 --> 01:18:40,939
Really?
1262
01:18:40,977 --> 01:18:43,002
Yeah, but it's
just a tiny lump.
1263
01:18:43,046 --> 01:18:45,446
No one'll notice.
1264
01:18:45,482 --> 01:18:48,042
You're right.
I can't go out dressed like this.
1265
01:18:53,523 --> 01:18:56,924
# Rah! #
1266
01:18:56,960 --> 01:19:00,623
- # I've got a New Age girl #
- # Tell us what she's like #
1267
01:19:00,663 --> 01:19:04,292
- # Environmentalist girl #
- # Does she ride a bike? #
1268
01:19:04,334 --> 01:19:06,393
- # She has a crystal necklace... #
- Hey!
1269
01:19:06,436 --> 01:19:07,960
- Coming!
- # She spend a lot of cash? #
1270
01:19:08,004 --> 01:19:09,995
# Though her vibes
are rather reckless #
1271
01:19:10,039 --> 01:19:12,803
- # Heading for the crash... #
- Hey!
1272
01:19:12,842 --> 01:19:15,606
Man:
Nice going, buddy!
1273
01:19:15,645 --> 01:19:18,375
#... and she wonders about knowing,
where did we begin? #
1274
01:19:18,415 --> 01:19:21,009
# Mary Moon #
1275
01:19:21,050 --> 01:19:25,043
- # She's a vegetarian #
- # Mary Moon, Mary Moon, Mary Moon #
1276
01:19:25,088 --> 01:19:29,889
# Mary Moon will help with all
the septuagenarians... #
1277
01:19:29,926 --> 01:19:32,588
- # Mary Moon, Mary Moon, Mary Moon.
- Ma 'am.
1278
01:19:32,629 --> 01:19:36,656
# Mary Moon,
she's an intellectual... #
1279
01:19:36,699 --> 01:19:38,667
Beautiful outfit,
sir.
1280
01:19:38,701 --> 01:19:40,760
There you go.
1281
01:19:40,804 --> 01:19:44,365
# Mary Moon, despite that fact,
remains quite sexual #
1282
01:19:44,407 --> 01:19:46,898
# Mary Moon, Mary Moon,
Mary Moon. #
1283
01:19:51,514 --> 01:19:54,312
Hey.
How you doin'?
1284
01:19:54,350 --> 01:19:56,011
You're a little early.
1285
01:19:56,052 --> 01:19:59,021
We don't open
for about 45 minutes.
1286
01:19:59,055 --> 01:20:01,455
I'm meeting
someone here.
1287
01:20:01,491 --> 01:20:05,723
- Mind if I wait at the bar?
- No. Come on in.
1288
01:20:08,131 --> 01:20:10,759
It's a beautiful day,
huh, Harry?
1289
01:20:10,800 --> 01:20:14,600
Yes yes, I've had a wonderful time
so far. Thank you.
1290
01:20:14,637 --> 01:20:17,572
God, it feels
so good to get up here.
1291
01:20:17,607 --> 01:20:21,043
I haven't been outside that much
in the last couple weeks.
1292
01:20:21,077 --> 01:20:23,511
Oh, yeah?
Why not?
1293
01:20:23,546 --> 01:20:27,414
Um, there's been
some family problems,
1294
01:20:27,450 --> 01:20:30,419
but I don't want
to bore you with those.
1295
01:20:30,453 --> 01:20:32,444
Thanks.
1296
01:20:32,489 --> 01:20:34,923
Oh, look. Frost.
1297
01:20:38,161 --> 01:20:41,790
Harry?
1298
01:20:43,833 --> 01:20:45,664
- Are you okay?
- Oh, yeah,
1299
01:20:45,702 --> 01:20:48,899
I do this all the time.
1300
01:20:52,475 --> 01:20:54,773
Let's go to the top
this time.
1301
01:21:01,718 --> 01:21:05,677
- Hi, there.
- Ugh...
1302
01:21:05,722 --> 01:21:07,451
Say, kids,
1303
01:21:07,490 --> 01:21:09,390
you wouldn't
happen to have
1304
01:21:09,425 --> 01:21:11,518
a cup of warm water,
would you?
1305
01:21:11,561 --> 01:21:14,189
Yuck.
1306
01:21:17,934 --> 01:21:19,902
Excuse me.
1307
01:21:19,936 --> 01:21:22,131
Is it 10:00 A.M. yet?
1308
01:21:23,139 --> 01:21:25,300
It's 1:00.
1309
01:21:27,977 --> 01:21:32,107
That's what I have too.
Thought maybe it was fast.
1310
01:21:35,118 --> 01:21:37,814
She's running late,
huh?
1311
01:21:37,854 --> 01:21:41,119
Just a couple hours.
You know girls.
1312
01:21:41,157 --> 01:21:43,853
When they're excited
about something,
1313
01:21:43,893 --> 01:21:46,225
everything has to
be perfect.
1314
01:21:53,770 --> 01:21:55,829
This one's on me.
1315
01:21:57,974 --> 01:21:59,965
Yippee.
1316
01:22:00,009 --> 01:22:01,943
Chablis, please.
1317
01:22:02,946 --> 01:22:05,141
Hello.
1318
01:22:11,120 --> 01:22:13,213
Bad day, huh?
1319
01:22:14,223 --> 01:22:16,623
Me too.
1320
01:22:16,659 --> 01:22:18,524
'Course everything's
been bad
1321
01:22:18,561 --> 01:22:20,791
since I broke up
with my boyfriend.
1322
01:22:33,876 --> 01:22:36,310
Oh my God.
1323
01:22:39,549 --> 01:22:41,779
My God! You poor guy.
Does it hurt?
1324
01:22:41,818 --> 01:22:44,719
I'm fine. I saved
a seat for you.
1325
01:22:46,556 --> 01:22:48,251
Oh no, listen. This is silly.
Let me help you.
1326
01:22:48,291 --> 01:22:50,191
No no no no no.
1327
01:22:50,226 --> 01:22:52,558
Yes. It'll only hurt for a moment,
like a Band-Aid.
1328
01:22:52,595 --> 01:22:55,029
- Come on, ready?
- No no no no. No.
1329
01:22:55,064 --> 01:22:56,895
Come on. Go.
1330
01:23:23,760 --> 01:23:27,093
# Well, if you want,
I'll be by your side #
1331
01:23:27,130 --> 01:23:31,191
# And if you don't,
maybe suicide #
1332
01:23:31,234 --> 01:23:35,068
# It's my love
that'd kill me, dear #
1333
01:23:35,104 --> 01:23:38,267
# If you won't hold me
and have me near #
1334
01:23:38,307 --> 01:23:42,676
# 'Cause I'll be good
to you in every way #
1335
01:23:42,712 --> 01:23:45,875
# I'll give you loving,
baby, every day #
1336
01:23:45,915 --> 01:23:49,316
# A loving that's good enough,
a loving that's all right #
1337
01:23:49,352 --> 01:23:52,583
# I'll love you like an oven
on the coldest night #
1338
01:23:52,622 --> 01:23:54,522
# Whoo! #
1339
01:24:07,770 --> 01:24:12,503
# 'Cause if you don't love me,
I'll kill myself #
1340
01:24:15,344 --> 01:24:19,246
# If you don't love me,
I'll kill myself #
1341
01:24:22,018 --> 01:24:26,045
# If you don't love me,
I'll kill myself #
1342
01:24:28,324 --> 01:24:33,626
# If you don't love me,
I'll kill myself #
1343
01:24:34,630 --> 01:24:36,860
Come on, come on.
1344
01:24:36,899 --> 01:24:39,129
# If you don't love me. #
1345
01:24:39,168 --> 01:24:43,628
Pfft.
1346
01:24:43,673 --> 01:24:46,039
What am-
1347
01:24:49,412 --> 01:24:51,380
I said to myself,
"Run, Beth.
1348
01:24:51,414 --> 01:24:54,178
Run for your life before this man
kills you both. "
1349
01:24:54,217 --> 01:24:56,879
Then do you know
what the klutz did?
1350
01:24:56,919 --> 01:24:59,717
No, and I don't care!
1351
01:24:59,756 --> 01:25:02,623
I'm going to tell you, He came home
one night dead drunk
1352
01:25:02,658 --> 01:25:04,717
and decided he wanted
to fix the sink.
1353
01:25:04,761 --> 01:25:06,251
Couldn't believe him.
1354
01:25:06,295 --> 01:25:08,729
Anyway, enough about me.
Let's talk about you.
1355
01:25:08,765 --> 01:25:10,995
- How come you're here?
- Bartender!
1356
01:25:11,033 --> 01:25:13,228
Yeah?
1357
01:25:13,269 --> 01:25:17,137
You wouldn't happen to know
a Mary Swanson, would you?
1358
01:25:17,173 --> 01:25:20,006
Mary Swanson? Yeah.
1359
01:25:20,042 --> 01:25:22,806
She comes in here
all the time.
1360
01:25:22,845 --> 01:25:24,676
What's that
supposed to mean?
1361
01:25:24,714 --> 01:25:26,147
She has dinner.
1362
01:25:26,182 --> 01:25:30,278
Oh. I'm sorry.
1363
01:25:34,223 --> 01:25:38,091
You know where
she lives?
1364
01:25:38,127 --> 01:25:42,154
Yeah, her family has the big place
up on Alpine Drive.
1365
01:25:42,198 --> 01:25:45,326
Alpine Drive?
Big place?
1366
01:25:53,075 --> 01:25:55,407
No way!
1367
01:25:57,013 --> 01:25:59,072
That's great!
1368
01:25:59,115 --> 01:26:01,481
We landed
on the moon!
1369
01:26:08,191 --> 01:26:10,182
I've gotta tell you,
1370
01:26:10,226 --> 01:26:12,854
today was just what I needed.
Thanks a lot, Harry.
1371
01:26:12,895 --> 01:26:15,693
Blell, blit blas...
1372
01:26:15,731 --> 01:26:18,222
it was my pleasure,
Mary.
1373
01:26:18,267 --> 01:26:21,202
So you'll pick me up
tonight at 7:45?
1374
01:26:21,237 --> 01:26:23,068
Well, no, I've got
a few things
1375
01:26:23,105 --> 01:26:24,732
to take care of first.
1376
01:26:24,774 --> 01:26:26,435
Why don't we make it
quarter to 8:00?
1377
01:26:26,475 --> 01:26:30,741
Stop it!
1378
01:26:30,780 --> 01:26:33,374
Okay 7:45.
1379
01:26:34,851 --> 01:26:37,684
Bye.
1380
01:27:22,064 --> 01:27:24,055
Doesn't make
any sense, Lloyd.
1381
01:27:24,100 --> 01:27:25,863
She told me
10:00 sharp!
1382
01:27:25,902 --> 01:27:28,234
Are you sure you went
to the right bar?
1383
01:27:28,271 --> 01:27:32,139
Oh, yeah. Yep.
I'm pretty sure.
1384
01:27:32,174 --> 01:27:35,337
Lobby bar.
Right in the lobby.
1385
01:27:35,378 --> 01:27:38,506
Ahh... well...
1386
01:27:38,547 --> 01:27:41,345
maybe she just had
a change of heart.
1387
01:27:41,384 --> 01:27:44,820
Oh, that pisses me off!
That pisses me right off!
1388
01:27:44,854 --> 01:27:46,845
I hate when women
do that, you know?
1389
01:27:46,889 --> 01:27:48,550
She wanted
to see you again!
1390
01:27:48,591 --> 01:27:50,456
She told me that!
And now no?
1391
01:27:50,493 --> 01:27:53,394
Now- wait a minute!
Wait!
1392
01:27:53,429 --> 01:27:56,364
She must have meant
10:00 at night.
1393
01:27:56,399 --> 01:27:58,924
Do you think?
1394
01:27:58,968 --> 01:28:02,961
Why would she have you meet her
at a bar at 10:00 in the morning?
1395
01:28:03,005 --> 01:28:05,166
I just figured she was
a raging alcoholic.
1396
01:28:10,913 --> 01:28:13,177
- Oh, that's th-
- And all this time,
1397
01:28:13,215 --> 01:28:17,117
I've been going through such pain
and personal anguish.
1398
01:28:17,153 --> 01:28:20,213
Such hell!
For nothing!
1399
01:28:20,256 --> 01:28:22,053
Oh, God.
That's funny.
1400
01:28:22,091 --> 01:28:24,423
Oh, that's good stuff.
Oh, boy.
1401
01:28:24,460 --> 01:28:27,190
Well, listen, looks like
you got your night planned,
1402
01:28:27,229 --> 01:28:29,527
so I'm just going to head out
and catch a flick.
1403
01:28:29,565 --> 01:28:31,226
Okay.
1404
01:28:33,235 --> 01:28:35,601
10:00 in the morning.
1405
01:28:52,321 --> 01:28:54,949
Hey, Harry,
old buddy, old pal!
1406
01:28:54,991 --> 01:28:56,618
Yeah?
1407
01:28:56,659 --> 01:29:00,117
Will you join me in a good-luck toast
before you head out?
1408
01:29:00,162 --> 01:29:03,563
Oh, sure thing. Whatever you think
will help your chances.
1409
01:29:03,599 --> 01:29:05,965
Yes, sirree.
1410
01:29:06,002 --> 01:29:08,266
You know why
I like you, Harry?
1411
01:29:08,304 --> 01:29:10,534
Because you're
a regular guy.
1412
01:29:11,974 --> 01:29:15,375
Yep, that's why I want you
to stay regular.
1413
01:29:16,512 --> 01:29:21,313
1/2 teaspoon for fast,
effective relief.
1414
01:29:42,004 --> 01:29:46,100
To my friend Harry...
the matchmaker.
1415
01:29:46,142 --> 01:29:49,600
Oh, get out of here.
I'm- I've-
1416
01:30:16,005 --> 01:30:18,769
Hi, the door's open.
Come on upstairs.
1417
01:30:24,046 --> 01:30:25,479
- Hi.
- Hi.
1418
01:30:25,514 --> 01:30:27,141
Hi, make yourself
at home, okay?
1419
01:30:27,183 --> 01:30:28,650
I'm almost ready.
One minute?
1420
01:30:28,684 --> 01:30:31,209
- Okay, sounds good.
- Okay.
1421
01:31:54,670 --> 01:31:57,434
Harry, are you
in there?
1422
01:31:57,473 --> 01:31:59,464
Be right out!
1423
01:31:59,508 --> 01:32:03,274
I hope you're not using the toilet.
It's broken.
1424
01:32:06,415 --> 01:32:10,112
- Huh?
- The toilet doesn't flush.
1425
01:32:10,152 --> 01:32:12,347
No, I was
just shaving.
1426
01:32:12,388 --> 01:32:14,583
Shaving?
1427
01:32:14,623 --> 01:32:17,148
Yeah, I was running
a little late.
1428
01:32:17,193 --> 01:32:19,661
I thought this
would save some time.
1429
01:32:21,664 --> 01:32:25,896
Okay well, I'll be in the kitchen
whenever you're ready.
1430
01:32:28,470 --> 01:32:31,132
Oh, Jeez!
1431
01:32:46,388 --> 01:32:48,219
Tomorrow on
"A Current Affair,"
1432
01:32:48,257 --> 01:32:50,817
inside the home of the Menendez
brothers' attorney.
1433
01:32:50,859 --> 01:32:53,089
And next, we'll be
back in a minute
1434
01:32:53,128 --> 01:32:57,531
with the heartbreaking story
of the blind Rhode Island boy
1435
01:32:57,566 --> 01:33:00,501
who was duped into
buying a dead parakeet.
1436
01:33:00,536 --> 01:33:03,699
I just thought
he was real quiet.
1437
01:33:08,444 --> 01:33:10,173
Who are these
sick people?
1438
01:33:15,284 --> 01:33:17,343
- Hi!
- Hi.
1439
01:33:17,386 --> 01:33:19,445
Yes?
1440
01:33:19,488 --> 01:33:21,183
Remember me?
1441
01:33:22,191 --> 01:33:25,422
Uh... not really.
1442
01:33:25,461 --> 01:33:29,420
Providen-
Providence.
1443
01:33:29,465 --> 01:33:31,490
I drove you
to the airport last week.
1444
01:33:31,533 --> 01:33:33,398
Oh my God!
1445
01:33:33,435 --> 01:33:36,165
Uh... Lloyd, right?
1446
01:33:36,205 --> 01:33:39,766
You remembered
my name.
1447
01:33:39,808 --> 01:33:42,208
What are you doing
in Aspen?
1448
01:33:42,244 --> 01:33:43,836
I brought you
your briefcase.
1449
01:33:43,879 --> 01:33:47,610
You left it at the airport,
you big goof!
1450
01:33:47,650 --> 01:33:50,483
- You have my briefcase?
- Yeah.
1451
01:33:50,519 --> 01:33:52,646
Hey, I have it
at my hotel room.
1452
01:33:52,688 --> 01:33:55,350
You want to jump on the bike with me?
We can go get it
1453
01:33:55,391 --> 01:33:58,849
unless...
unless you're busy.
1454
01:33:58,894 --> 01:34:00,828
Oh, no no no!
1455
01:34:00,863 --> 01:34:02,728
- I don't wanna-
- You just wait right here.
1456
01:34:02,765 --> 01:34:04,460
- Okay.
- Okay?
1457
01:34:09,305 --> 01:34:11,796
Come on, flush,
you bastard!
1458
01:34:15,411 --> 01:34:17,743
Harry, what are
you doing in there?
1459
01:34:17,780 --> 01:34:23,150
I'm just- I'm cleaning my teeth!
1460
01:34:36,465 --> 01:34:38,126
I'm cleaning my teeth.
1461
01:34:39,601 --> 01:34:41,762
I'm gargling.
1462
01:34:41,804 --> 01:34:44,466
Just give me a minute, Mary.
I'll be right with you.
1463
01:34:44,506 --> 01:34:46,804
Harry, I'm sorry, but something
important's come up,
1464
01:34:46,842 --> 01:34:48,742
and I've got
to run out.
1465
01:34:48,777 --> 01:34:51,610
It's-it's sort of an emergency.
I'll explain later.
1466
01:34:51,647 --> 01:34:55,276
- But, Mary-
- I'm sorry. I've really got to go.
1467
01:34:55,317 --> 01:34:57,649
I promise we'll do this
again sometime.
1468
01:35:08,931 --> 01:35:11,263
Race you to the top.
1469
01:35:12,935 --> 01:35:15,927
Come here.
1470
01:35:18,741 --> 01:35:22,268
Yeah!
1471
01:35:23,445 --> 01:35:24,969
I won!
1472
01:35:25,013 --> 01:35:27,777
Look familiar?
1473
01:35:27,816 --> 01:35:29,716
I don't believe it.
You really have it.
1474
01:35:29,752 --> 01:35:31,549
Of course, I have it.
1475
01:35:31,587 --> 01:35:33,851
When Lloyd Christmas
drives a woman to the airport,
1476
01:35:33,889 --> 01:35:35,652
he makes sure she gets
all her luggage.
1477
01:35:35,691 --> 01:35:38,717
- That's my whole philosophy.
- This is incredible.
1478
01:35:38,761 --> 01:35:41,525
You mean to say
you drove 2,000 miles
1479
01:35:41,563 --> 01:35:43,997
just for me?
1480
01:35:44,032 --> 01:35:49,095
Uh... I didn't really
have a lot to do.
1481
01:35:50,506 --> 01:35:52,371
And I know how
frustrating it can be
1482
01:35:52,408 --> 01:35:54,501
to lose a bag.
1483
01:35:54,543 --> 01:35:57,706
That is so sweet, Lloyd.
1484
01:36:12,094 --> 01:36:15,393
Look, Mary, I know this may
seem a little sudden,
1485
01:36:15,431 --> 01:36:17,524
but I've given it
a lot of thought.
1486
01:36:17,566 --> 01:36:20,694
You're the woman I've been waiting
for my whole life,
1487
01:36:20,736 --> 01:36:22,499
and I'm not ashamed
to admit it.
1488
01:36:22,538 --> 01:36:26,668
Please...
Let me finish.
1489
01:36:26,708 --> 01:36:30,007
I'm crazy about you.
1490
01:36:30,045 --> 01:36:32,912
I've never felt this way
about anybody.
1491
01:36:32,948 --> 01:36:35,678
Listen to me.
1492
01:36:35,717 --> 01:36:38,709
I feel like
a schoolboy again,
1493
01:36:38,754 --> 01:36:41,518
a schoolboy
who desperately wants
1494
01:36:41,557 --> 01:36:44,287
to make sweet
sweet love to you.
1495
01:36:53,702 --> 01:36:57,331
Oh, I thought I heard
you talking to someone.
1496
01:36:59,541 --> 01:37:03,341
Mary, I-I-
1497
01:37:08,450 --> 01:37:11,851
I desperately want to make love
to a schoolboy.
1498
01:37:13,088 --> 01:37:15,921
- Maybe I should be going.
- No no...
1499
01:37:17,860 --> 01:37:20,829
No, I- that's not
what I meant.
1500
01:37:23,832 --> 01:37:28,735
Um... what I
meant was, um...
1501
01:37:30,873 --> 01:37:32,773
God.
1502
01:37:32,808 --> 01:37:35,800
I- I like you, Mary.
1503
01:37:38,180 --> 01:37:41,809
I like you a lot.
1504
01:37:43,118 --> 01:37:47,748
I want to ask you a question
straight out, flat out,
1505
01:37:47,789 --> 01:37:50,121
and I want you to give me
an honest answer.
1506
01:37:50,158 --> 01:37:52,592
What do you think
the chances are
1507
01:37:52,628 --> 01:37:56,689
of a guy like you
and a girl like me...
1508
01:37:58,133 --> 01:38:00,431
ending up together?
1509
01:38:00,469 --> 01:38:02,801
Well, Lloyd,
that's difficult to say.
1510
01:38:02,838 --> 01:38:05,534
We really don't-
1511
01:38:05,607 --> 01:38:08,167
Hit me with it!
Just give it to me straight!
1512
01:38:08,210 --> 01:38:10,440
I came a long way
just to see you, Mary.
1513
01:38:10,479 --> 01:38:13,004
Just- the least you can do
is level with me.
1514
01:38:13,048 --> 01:38:15,448
What are my chances?
1515
01:38:15,484 --> 01:38:18,009
Not good.
1516
01:38:21,990 --> 01:38:26,484
You mean not good,
like one out of 100?
1517
01:38:26,528 --> 01:38:30,897
I'd say more like
one out of a million.
1518
01:38:36,204 --> 01:38:40,072
So you're telling me
there's a chance!
1519
01:38:42,210 --> 01:38:44,303
Yeah!
1520
01:38:45,914 --> 01:38:47,882
I read you.
1521
01:38:54,923 --> 01:38:57,892
Hi. We have plenty
of towels. Thanks.
1522
01:38:57,926 --> 01:39:00,759
Nicholas!
What are you doing here?
1523
01:39:00,796 --> 01:39:02,491
I've been looking
for you, Mary.
1524
01:39:02,531 --> 01:39:04,522
I have some news
about your husband.
1525
01:39:05,767 --> 01:39:09,134
Husband?!
Wait a minute!
1526
01:39:10,739 --> 01:39:14,505
What was all that
one-in-a-million talk?
1527
01:39:14,543 --> 01:39:17,341
Aren't you going to
invite me in?
1528
01:39:22,317 --> 01:39:26,014
Hey, Harry,
you never called!
1529
01:39:26,054 --> 01:39:27,988
What are you doing here?
1530
01:39:31,994 --> 01:39:35,088
Excuse me, gunman,
who are you?
1531
01:39:35,130 --> 01:39:37,155
Don't play dumb
with me, asshole!
1532
01:39:37,199 --> 01:39:40,066
I'm the rightful owner of that briefcase
you've been carrying around!
1533
01:39:40,102 --> 01:39:42,229
Oh. Well, then...
1534
01:39:42,270 --> 01:39:46,297
Nicholas, my family
trusted you.
1535
01:39:46,341 --> 01:39:48,536
Shut up!
1536
01:39:48,577 --> 01:39:52,570
Listen, Mr. Samsonite,
about the briefcase-
1537
01:39:52,614 --> 01:39:54,639
my friend Harry and I
have every intention
1538
01:39:54,683 --> 01:39:57,243
- of fully reimbursing you.
- What?
1539
01:39:57,285 --> 01:40:00,812
You open it up.
Open it up!
1540
01:40:00,856 --> 01:40:03,689
Go ahead, open it up.
Do what he says.
1541
01:40:03,725 --> 01:40:05,488
Hurry.
1542
01:40:10,365 --> 01:40:12,856
What is this?
What is this?
1543
01:40:12,901 --> 01:40:14,596
Where's all the money?
1544
01:40:14,636 --> 01:40:17,571
That's as good
as money, sir.
1545
01:40:17,606 --> 01:40:20,097
Those are IOUs.
Go ahead and add it up.
1546
01:40:20,142 --> 01:40:22,076
Every cent's
accounted for.
1547
01:40:22,110 --> 01:40:25,045
Look. See this?
1548
01:40:25,080 --> 01:40:27,344
That's a car.
275 thou.
1549
01:40:27,382 --> 01:40:29,543
Might want to hang on
to that one.
1550
01:40:33,355 --> 01:40:36,381
You're a dead man.
You're a dead man!
1551
01:40:41,363 --> 01:40:44,298
Lloyd, I'm home!
1552
01:40:44,332 --> 01:40:47,631
Look, we've got to have
a serious talk.
1553
01:40:47,669 --> 01:40:49,193
I got a confession
to make.
1554
01:40:49,237 --> 01:40:51,068
Oh, good.
You found her.
1555
01:40:51,106 --> 01:40:52,664
I'll leave
you two alone.
1556
01:40:52,708 --> 01:40:54,903
No. Stay.
1557
01:40:55,911 --> 01:40:57,879
Ugh!
1558
01:41:01,349 --> 01:41:04,341
Yes, I'd like a one-way ticket
to Amsterdam
1559
01:41:04,386 --> 01:41:07,082
departing as soon
as possible, please.
1560
01:41:07,122 --> 01:41:09,716
How do you guys
know each other?
1561
01:41:09,758 --> 01:41:11,692
We used to be
best friends.
1562
01:41:11,727 --> 01:41:13,695
Yeah, until he turned
into a backstabber.
1563
01:41:13,729 --> 01:41:16,755
Me a backstabber?
You got a lot of nerve.
1564
01:41:16,798 --> 01:41:18,629
You knew I was
crazy about her!
1565
01:41:18,667 --> 01:41:20,965
And you knew I was crazy
about Fraida Felcher,
1566
01:41:21,002 --> 01:41:24,403
and that didn't stop you, did it?
1567
01:41:24,439 --> 01:41:26,737
- What do you mean?
- What do you mean?
1568
01:41:26,775 --> 01:41:28,675
Don't deny it, Lloyd.
1569
01:41:28,710 --> 01:41:31,975
Fraida told me the whole sleazy story,
Mr. French Tickler.
1570
01:41:34,850 --> 01:41:37,375
Okay, what time does it-
what time does that leave?
1571
01:41:37,419 --> 01:41:39,387
Thank you-
wait a second.
1572
01:41:39,421 --> 01:41:41,355
Can I have
a vegetarian meal?
1573
01:41:41,389 --> 01:41:43,789
I guess we both learned
a little something
1574
01:41:43,825 --> 01:41:46,293
- about each other today, didn't we?
- Yeah, you said it, pal.
1575
01:41:46,328 --> 01:41:47,989
Maybe we're not as good of
friends as we thought we were.
1576
01:41:48,029 --> 01:41:48,961
I guess not.
1577
01:41:48,997 --> 01:41:51,864
I mean, if one beautiful girl
can rip us apart like this,
1578
01:41:51,900 --> 01:41:53,891
then maybe our friendship
isn't worth a damn.
1579
01:41:53,935 --> 01:41:55,368
Maybe we should
call it quits right now.
1580
01:41:55,403 --> 01:41:57,371
You just tell me
where to sign, bud.
1581
01:41:57,405 --> 01:41:59,396
Right on my ass
after you kiss it!
1582
01:41:59,441 --> 01:42:01,033
Kiss it?!
You kiss mine!
1583
01:42:01,076 --> 01:42:03,237
Both cheeks, both lips,
right here!
1584
01:42:03,278 --> 01:42:07,237
- Put it right-
- Shut up!
1585
01:42:09,251 --> 01:42:11,981
Now, which one of you losers
wants to get it first?
1586
01:42:13,455 --> 01:42:16,015
Over here...
1587
01:42:16,057 --> 01:42:18,457
I was the one that got you into
this whole mess.
1588
01:42:18,493 --> 01:42:20,791
Come on
and shoot me.
1589
01:42:20,829 --> 01:42:23,855
No! Wait! Wait.
No no, do me first.
1590
01:42:23,899 --> 01:42:25,992
I stole your girl, Lloyd.
I deserve it.
1591
01:42:26,034 --> 01:42:27,467
- No, you don't.
- Yes, I do.
1592
01:42:27,502 --> 01:42:29,697
- No, you don't-
- Yes, I do!
1593
01:42:29,738 --> 01:42:32,104
Yesterday was one of the greatest
days of my life.
1594
01:42:32,140 --> 01:42:36,270
Mary and I went skiing, we made
a snowman, she touched my leg.
1595
01:42:36,311 --> 01:42:38,677
Okay, kill him!
1596
01:42:45,153 --> 01:42:47,553
Oh! Oh, no!
1597
01:42:49,024 --> 01:42:52,289
You killed my best friend,
you bastard!
1598
01:42:52,327 --> 01:42:53,954
If it's any consolation,
1599
01:42:53,995 --> 01:42:56,156
you're about
to be reunited.
1600
01:43:02,270 --> 01:43:06,172
Harry!
You're alive!
1601
01:43:06,208 --> 01:43:08,904
And you're
a horrible shot.
1602
01:43:08,944 --> 01:43:11,003
Lucky me.
1603
01:43:11,046 --> 01:43:13,514
Police! Open up!
Nobody move!
1604
01:43:13,548 --> 01:43:16,915
Everybody freeze!
Get those hands up!
1605
01:43:16,952 --> 01:43:18,442
Not you, dummy!
1606
01:43:18,486 --> 01:43:20,044
Get the gun.
1607
01:43:20,088 --> 01:43:22,784
Special Officer
Beth Jordan, FBl.
1608
01:43:22,824 --> 01:43:24,382
Hey! Who?
But- huh?
1609
01:43:24,426 --> 01:43:26,360
Mr. Dunne,
thank you very much.
1610
01:43:26,394 --> 01:43:29,363
We couldn't have
done it without you.
1611
01:43:29,397 --> 01:43:30,921
We've been
following you guys
1612
01:43:30,966 --> 01:43:32,297
all the way
from Providence.
1613
01:43:32,334 --> 01:43:34,131
What's going on,
Harry?
1614
01:43:34,169 --> 01:43:37,468
Your name is Harry,
isn't it?
1615
01:43:37,505 --> 01:43:41,032
Yeah, she-she grabbed me down the lobby,
explained what was up.
1616
01:43:41,076 --> 01:43:43,169
Then they slapped
this bulletproof vest on me
1617
01:43:43,211 --> 01:43:45,338
and gave me a gun.
1618
01:43:47,115 --> 01:43:49,481
But what if he shot you
in the face?
1619
01:43:50,552 --> 01:43:52,952
What if he shot me
in the face?
1620
01:43:52,988 --> 01:43:55,286
That's a risk
we were willing to take.
1621
01:43:55,323 --> 01:43:57,188
How come I didn't
get a gun?
1622
01:43:57,225 --> 01:43:59,489
Did you
get a gun?
1623
01:43:59,527 --> 01:44:04,157
# We can't play
this game anymore #
1624
01:44:04,199 --> 01:44:08,829
# But can we still
be friends? #
1625
01:44:10,472 --> 01:44:15,239
# Things just can't
go on like before #
1626
01:44:15,277 --> 01:44:19,941
# But can we still
be friends? #
1627
01:44:19,981 --> 01:44:25,442
# We had something
to learn #
1628
01:44:25,487 --> 01:44:27,455
# Now it's time... #
1629
01:44:27,489 --> 01:44:29,389
You were right,
Lloyd.
1630
01:44:29,424 --> 01:44:31,483
She was definitely
worth the trip.
1631
01:44:31,526 --> 01:44:36,054
Yeah. She's something,
ain't she, Harr?
1632
01:44:36,097 --> 01:44:37,962
I'm glad we were able
to help her out.
1633
01:44:37,999 --> 01:44:43,869
# You know
it's all gone #
1634
01:44:43,905 --> 01:44:47,841
# Let's admit
we made a mistake... #
1635
01:44:47,876 --> 01:44:49,605
- Honey!
- Easy easy.
1636
01:44:49,644 --> 01:44:52,010
- You're okay.
- Okay, I'm just a little sore.
1637
01:44:52,047 --> 01:44:54,914
I'm sorry.
Oh, sweetie.
1638
01:44:54,950 --> 01:44:57,214
Oh, baby, I missed
your loving.
1639
01:44:57,252 --> 01:44:59,516
Honey, there's someone
I want to introduce you to.
1640
01:44:59,554 --> 01:45:01,988
He's the kindest,
gentlest man I've ever met.
1641
01:45:02,023 --> 01:45:03,854
- Will you meet him?
- Sure.
1642
01:45:03,892 --> 01:45:06,258
He's got a gun!
1643
01:45:08,964 --> 01:45:11,865
Lloyd? Lloyd!
1644
01:45:13,902 --> 01:45:16,996
I said this is
my husband Bobby.
1645
01:45:17,038 --> 01:45:20,030
- Oh. Hi, Bobby.
- Hi.
1646
01:45:20,075 --> 01:45:24,569
- I'm so happy for you.
- Thank you.
1647
01:45:24,612 --> 01:45:27,445
Thank you both
very much.
1648
01:45:27,482 --> 01:45:31,077
I owe you both
a debt of gratitude.
1649
01:45:31,119 --> 01:45:32,882
Thank you.
1650
01:45:51,973 --> 01:45:54,441
I can't believe
this, Lloyd.
1651
01:45:54,476 --> 01:45:56,376
First Mary dumps us,
1652
01:45:56,411 --> 01:45:58,345
then the cops take
our nest egg.
1653
01:45:58,380 --> 01:46:00,473
- Then our hog breaks down.
- Yeah!
1654
01:46:00,515 --> 01:46:03,643
When are we ever
gonna catch a break?
1655
01:46:05,453 --> 01:46:10,116
# Hallelujah #
1656
01:46:10,158 --> 01:46:12,456
# Hallelujah
hallelujah #
1657
01:46:12,494 --> 01:46:14,758
# Hallelujah. #
1658
01:46:17,198 --> 01:46:21,134
Hi, y'all.
1659
01:46:21,169 --> 01:46:23,330
Hi, guys! We're going
on a national bikini tour,
1660
01:46:23,371 --> 01:46:25,100
and we're looking for
two oil boys
1661
01:46:25,140 --> 01:46:27,506
who can grease us up
before each competition.
1662
01:46:31,713 --> 01:46:34,238
You are in luck!
1663
01:46:34,282 --> 01:46:37,547
There's a town about
three miles that way.
1664
01:46:37,585 --> 01:46:39,849
I'm sure you'll find
a couple guys there.
1665
01:46:42,590 --> 01:46:45,115
Okay. Thanks.
1666
01:46:45,160 --> 01:46:47,253
Bye!
1667
01:46:54,369 --> 01:46:56,997
Do you realize
what you've done?
1668
01:46:57,038 --> 01:47:00,667
- Hey!
- Lloyd!
1669
01:47:00,708 --> 01:47:03,370
Lloyd!
1670
01:47:11,086 --> 01:47:13,384
You'll have to
excuse my friend.
1671
01:47:13,421 --> 01:47:16,390
He's a little slow.
1672
01:47:16,424 --> 01:47:19,518
The town is
back that way.
1673
01:47:29,170 --> 01:47:30,694
Wow.
1674
01:47:30,738 --> 01:47:32,638
Two lucky guys
1675
01:47:32,674 --> 01:47:34,767
are gonna be driving around
with those girls
1676
01:47:34,809 --> 01:47:36,674
for the next
couple of months.
1677
01:47:36,711 --> 01:47:39,373
Yeah, don't worry.
1678
01:47:39,414 --> 01:47:41,245
We'll catch
our break too.
1679
01:47:41,282 --> 01:47:44,774
- Just gotta keep our eyes open.
- Yeah.
1680
01:47:44,819 --> 01:47:47,685
# Now, we've been
friends forever... #
1681
01:47:47,722 --> 01:47:50,418
- You're it.
- You're it.
1682
01:47:50,458 --> 01:47:52,187
You're it.
Quitsies.
1683
01:47:52,227 --> 01:47:54,195
You're it. Anti-quitsies,
double-stamp.
1684
01:47:54,229 --> 01:47:56,754
You're it. Anti-quitsies,
triple-stamp.
1685
01:47:56,798 --> 01:47:58,789
- No erasies, none at all.
- You can't triple-stamp.
1686
01:47:58,833 --> 01:48:01,063
Yes, if you have a double-stamp,
of course you can.
1687
01:48:01,102 --> 01:48:02,660
- You can't triple-stamp!
- # La la la la la... #
1688
01:48:02,704 --> 01:48:04,672
You can't if you
have a double-stamp!
1689
01:48:04,706 --> 01:48:06,469
You can't triple-stamp-
the rule!
1690
01:48:06,508 --> 01:48:10,467
You can't triple-stamp
a double-stamp, Lloyd!
1691
01:48:10,512 --> 01:48:13,345
Lloyd! Lloyd!
1692
01:48:14,582 --> 01:48:18,484
# And now we're rolling
down the hill #
1693
01:48:20,388 --> 01:48:22,652
# Down the hill. #
1694
01:48:25,460 --> 01:48:29,123
# Here you go,
way too fast #
1695
01:48:29,164 --> 01:48:31,496
# Don't slow down,
you're gonna crash #
1696
01:48:31,533 --> 01:48:34,627
# You should watch,
watch your step #
1697
01:48:34,669 --> 01:48:37,194
# Don't look out,
gonna break your neck #
1698
01:48:37,238 --> 01:48:40,366
# So shut,
shut your mouth #
1699
01:48:40,408 --> 01:48:42,774
# 'Cause I'm not
listenin' anyhow #
1700
01:48:42,810 --> 01:48:45,836
# I had enough,
enough of you #
1701
01:48:45,880 --> 01:48:48,576
# Enough to last
a lifetime through #
1702
01:48:48,616 --> 01:48:51,608
# So what do you
want of me? #
1703
01:48:51,653 --> 01:48:54,451
# Got no words
of sympathy #
1704
01:48:54,489 --> 01:48:57,151
# And if I go
around with you #
1705
01:48:57,192 --> 01:49:01,128
# You know that I'll get
messed up too with you #
1706
01:49:16,311 --> 01:49:19,838
# Here you go,
way too fast #
1707
01:49:19,881 --> 01:49:22,406
# Don't slow down,
you're gonna crash #
1708
01:49:22,450 --> 01:49:25,385
# You don't know
what's been going down #
1709
01:49:25,420 --> 01:49:27,888
# You've been runnin'
all over town #
1710
01:49:27,922 --> 01:49:31,119
# So shut,
shut your mouth #
1711
01:49:31,159 --> 01:49:33,559
# 'Cause I'm not
listening anyhow #
1712
01:49:33,595 --> 01:49:36,689
# I've had enough,
enough of you #
1713
01:49:36,731 --> 01:49:39,461
# Enough to last
a lifetime through #
1714
01:49:39,500 --> 01:49:42,526
# So what do you
want of me?
1715
01:49:42,570 --> 01:49:45,300
# Got no cure
for misery #
1716
01:49:45,340 --> 01:49:47,900
# And if I go
around with you #
1717
01:49:47,942 --> 01:49:50,638
# You know that
I'll get messed up too #
1718
01:49:50,678 --> 01:49:56,608
# With you #
1719
01:49:59,954 --> 01:50:02,252
- # Slow down #
- # You're gonna crash #
1720
01:50:05,660 --> 01:50:08,026
- # Slow down #
- # You're gonna crash #
1721
01:50:24,646 --> 01:50:30,310
# With you #
1722
01:50:33,855 --> 01:50:36,187
- # Slow down #
- # You're gonna crash #
1723
01:50:39,527 --> 01:50:41,757
- # Slow down #
- # You're gonna crash #
1724
01:50:45,233 --> 01:50:47,827
- # Slow down #
- # You're gonna crash. #
1725
01:51:11,359 --> 01:51:15,261
# Well, if you want,
I'll be by your side #
1726
01:51:15,296 --> 01:51:19,232
# And if you don't,
maybe suicide #
1727
01:51:19,267 --> 01:51:22,703
# It's my love
that'd kill me, dear #
1728
01:51:22,737 --> 01:51:26,434
# If you won't hold me
and have me near #
1729
01:51:26,474 --> 01:51:30,001
# Because I'll be good
to you in every way #
1730
01:51:30,044 --> 01:51:33,810
# I'll give you lovin',
baby, every day #
1731
01:51:33,848 --> 01:51:37,443
# A lovin' that's good,
a lovin' that's all right #
1732
01:51:37,485 --> 01:51:40,579
# A lovin' like an oven
on the coldest night #
1733
01:51:55,403 --> 01:51:59,703
# 'Cause if you don't love me,
I'll kill myself #
1734
01:52:02,777 --> 01:52:07,180
# Yeah, if you don't love me,
I'll kill myself #
1735
01:52:09,984 --> 01:52:14,011
# If you don't love me,
I'll kill myself #
1736
01:52:17,325 --> 01:52:21,659
# If you don't love me,
I'll kill myself. #
116216
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