Original subtitles

JACK'S BROTHERS

EVE DAIGNEAULT

DORA DOLL.

AND FRANÇOISE ARNOULE

IN A MARCELLO PAGLIERO MOVIE

"ALA ROSA."

With Yves Robert and others.

Saint-Germain-des-Prés!

One of the oldest churches in Paris!

First built in 1103!

Destroyed in 1280!

Rebuilt in 1329!

Nowadays. nightlife center

and a gathering place for Jean-Paul Sartre and existentialists.

"Paris by Night" excursion, including champagne at 2995 francs,

with a stop at St. Germain des Prés,

with its famous existentialist. wine cellars.

And now, let's go, to Napoleon's tomb.

Hurry up, please, gentlemen.

Hurry up, hurry up!

Hurry up, please. Let's go!

- Napoleon's grave? - А?

Napoleon?

Well, where's the yellow light?

You're gonna point the yellow one? - Where to?

On my hair!

Yeah, that's it.

Yeah, it's about time!

The Jacques brothers set us up.

The Jacques brothers set us up?

I just got got a telegram.

They got stuck with their tour at the Swiss border.

Something with customs.

Very nice! So what are we gonna do do tonight?

- What are we gonna do? - Yeah.

Look, uh.

Aren't you the artistic director the artistic director?

Artistic Director ...

Of course! It's me the artistic director!

Only I'm not a magician!

I can't get them out of my pocket, Brothers Jacques!

Then we have to find others.

Find someone for tonight.

Do you have any idea? Tickets are sold out,

Tables are booked, newspaper ads!

Here, old boy...

So that in two hours. you find me something!

In two hours, mind you!

Hey, how's this! How am I replacing four artists at once!

How do you want me for me to do this play?!

- Napoleon? - No!

A general with castanets!

Hey, a sandwich and a beer, hurry up!

I have to prepare

for a two-hour play.

I owe them two hours to put on a play!

Hey, rising star of poetry! Why don't you do the Spanish dance?

And your friend will play the castanets.

- Can't you see it's working? - Uh-oh, it's working!

I work like this every morning.

Will you two shut up, or I'll tear this whole place down!

Please stop talking! Do you know who it is?!

In fact, I'm asking you for one thing:

don't speak to me until 10:00 p.m.!

Okay,

give me some tokens for the phone.

No, not at all! I said: "tokens," not "one token"!

Who knows who I'm gonna call now?

Call my aunt, she's a ventriloquist.

Shit! - Are you playing or talking?!

Ventriloquist!

But, look, Manito, you know, this is bad for your asthma!

Do you think it's good for glasses?

I'm gonna kick you out to the kettledrums.

Hey, listen! Give me a badge.

- Allow me. - No, wait, I have an idea.

- Oh, just the man I was looking for. - Uh-huh?

Listen, I have a favor to ask of you.

Yeah, hold on, I'll be right back.

Napoleon?

And one Napoleon for monsieur.

"ALA ROSA."

Do not, under any circumstances. don't let anyone through, there's no more seats.

Except for those who don't have a ticket. - No ticket?

Naturally, they're also would have to buy it.

Come on, move it! Don't just sit there!

Move it! It's full, it's crowded!

All right, are you ready?! - Now!

You warned us at 7:00 that we were performing at 10!

Rejoice!

Who knows where my pants are? - How would I know?

- My teeth hurt! - What does this have to do with my pants?

- I told you, my teeth hurt. - Where did my pants go?

Before I could turn around, you're already putting on my pants!

- Then where are mine? - I don't know!

No way! Are you kidding me?!

I wish I could find something for my teeth.

Are you practicing a new sketch? The pants sketch, right?

Listen, Albert, do you have a pill?

I don't have the pill! Hurry up!

- Listen, have you seen my dress? - No, I haven't seen any dress!

I don't have a dress, no pills, no pants!

I'm wearing my pants, baby. No offense.

There it is!

Hey, stop the music. It's blowhards now.

At least let us finish the song.

If there was if there was any difference.

Death to the heart! Death to the soul! Death to death and life to life!

Listen, Victor Hugo!

Than reading poetry to glasses, why don't you wash them?

I asked you to wash it, not chew it!

A dishwasher who eats glasses. What a find!

Death to the heart! Death to the soul! Death to death and life to life!

Evelyn Dorsay is coming down!

So what? Don't get a fever of 42°!

Well, it's still Evelyn Dorsay!

Evelyn Dorsay, Evelyn Dorsay!

And I knew her back in the days of the Mad Javelin Inn.

It represented a shamrock with four leaves! Okay?

Good evening, madam. We have a reservation.

So, Evelyn, say hello to your buddy?

Hello, my friend, hello.

Well, where's the photographer?

I don't know, my dear, should be here.

You could use a little production to be a producer once in a while.

It's your job, isn't it? You do realize there's no photographer?!

A movie is, after all. more delicate than stew.

My dear, it is not for you to reproach me

in the origin of my wealth. - Poor Matignon.

There's no need to be rude.

Stew is a must, too.

What a star!

She was doing a shamrock with four leaves.

How about you? You ever ride a scooter?

I'd rather not see it.

I'm gonna go get something to eat. - Not gonna happen.

Oh, no!

Tonight, for sure, I'm not gonna get a nibble today.

Claire Clarisse from "Sunday Paris."

Is Evelyn Dorsay here yet? - Yeah, she's here and she's mad as hell.

Oh, shit. I'm gonna have to ask her to come back in.

What is it this time? Another shortage of pants?

There, look at him.

Well, what's the matter?

My rinse!

I swallowed my gargle! "For external use. Poison."

Milk, Albert! Bring me milk!

- So you go and drink it yourself. - Yeah, milk!

Where are you gonna find milk around here?

Milk he went looking for...

I'm not running a dairy here!

What are you, delusional?

You can't leave it for 10 minutes, you strip naked!

Well, why don't you, I have a button to sew on.

While they finish up in there.

Listen, make me a glass of milk.

- A glass of milk? - Calm down, not me.

I'll have the usual, Cognac and water.

All right. Uh-huh.

I'm sorry.

Will you pay for a drink?

For a drink? Pay? You wish.

This is a club, not a soup kitchen.

We don't want soup, we want whiskey.

"SCHOOL OF COMEDY"

Ladies and gentlemen!

At a time when the theater is trying to get back to its roots,

we felt it was extremely important

bring to the attention of connoisseurs

a capital piece of work--

this is "Theater Management."

For recreational facilities and boarding houses.

This piece is the bottom line,

that any artist worthy of the title,

should be kept at all times on his bedside table at all times.

Necessary, it says in this essay,

to recite it like this, the way we say it,

and also the way we would speak in other circumstances.

For example,

Gaia!

Please just say: "Nice weather."

Nice weather!

You said, "Nice weather!" couldn't be simpler.

A simple statement, nothing more.

Now tell me:

"The weather could have been better, but all in all, good!"

The weather could have been a little better,

but overall

the weather is nice. - Bravo!

Did you use a new tone?

Intones of condescension?

Thank you!

Now, let's see, how important it is to resort

to variations in voice and volume

depending on your emotions.

For example,

admiration.

Beautiful weather!

Serious irony.

It's pouring like a bucket!

Nice weather!

Let's state it again.

- Hilarious irony. - Nice weather!

For the ducks!

Tenderness.

Nice weather! Let's go for a walk, dear!

The air will heal you.

You're about to start on a new movie soon?

Yeah, in a couple weeks.

It's going to be a beautiful painting.

Modern, original.

"Carmen." Do you know Bizet's novel?

Naturally.

The public is starting to get bored with the same stories.

And in the role of Jose, I heard the name Mareschal the name Mareschal was mentioned?

Mareshall! A great poster star!

Am I not enough for you as a poster star?

But, my dear, we must think of Provence!

The famous couple Evelyn Dorsay and Jean Maréchal!

It's perfect for Provence!

Listen, Matignon, don't piss me off.

I'm nervous enough as it is!

The famous couple is me!

You can write it down. - But listen, my dear!

Here we go. Speak of the devil.

Oh, Mr. Mareschal!

- It's good to see you again. - Quick, kid!

Look at him!

Now we're coming up to the questioning tone.

Total ignorance.

Is the weather nice?

Some uncertainty.

The weather's nice, isn't it?

Caution.

What do you think, the weather's going to be nice?

Victory.

Well, it's just like I told you: the weather's nice!

So, Mr. Maréchal, are you preparing something for us?

Yeah. I'll start in a couple weeks.

With Evelyn Dorsay. "Carmen."

I haven't signed it yet, but it's getting there.

Once again, the famous couple Mareschal and Evelyn Dorsey.

An exquisite delight.

Nice weather!

The air is so caressing!

All right, a little scotch, the usual, Mr. Mareschal?

Lots of scotch, Albert! Lots!

What?

Oh, how silly, my dear! I've just finished

the role of Prince Volkonsky in the movie "In the Service of the Tsar".

And you know, ever since then. thank you.

I'm so into this role,

I just can't seem to get rid of it to get rid of it.

Well, since everything seems fine, I'm gonna go get something to eat.

Yeah, but hurry up.

Listen, I just drank some milk. Do you think I'll be okay?

Once you've had a drink, don't move. Here, drink the antidote.

Yes?

Tell me, with this one,

do you have anything to make it go better?

I'll ask the landlady about that.

Mistress! - Yes?

Do you have anything for Mr. Albert?

I should have left some stew. I'll get it, Mr. Albert.

Hey, uh, tell me, you got a minute?

Well, I do now. Looks like it got off to a good start.

That's what I wanted to tell you.

You know, that money you lent me?

- Oh, yeah! - So, uh, uh.

О! Brothers Jacques!

Oh, damn Albert! You must be worried sick!

Oh, my God, we thought we'd never make it.

Can you believe they forgot their passports in Zurich!

So we sent a telegram, and everything was resolved at the border.

We got lucky. - Can you imagine what would have happened?

- Of course! Shall we go for a drink? - No, wait.

No, no, let's go!

We have plenty of time, don't worry.

Okay, wait for me one second!

Mr. Albert, I forgot to tell you!

The Jacques brothers called from the Lyon train station.

They're here after all, and they'll be here soon!

Hello! Hello!

- Hello! - Hello, Mimi!

Uh, listen, do you have some dental pills?

They hurt so bad!

That was a quick dinner! Finished already?

This is just the beginning!

I'm sorry.

"We go forward to the place where we bow."

We put our heels together and bend over.

Once is enough!

- What the hell is that? - It's Yves Gerard!

What does that mean?

Martine? What's she doing here?

- Who? - Martine.

Martine? Oh, well, that's Yves Gerard's partner.

Why, you know her? - Yeah, a little. That's my wife.

Oh, is that it? Careful, pay attention.

She's-- - Yves Gerard's partner!

What kind of masquerade is this?

No, this is not the way to do it! - What the hell is this?!

- Look, you telegraphed-- - Yeah, guys, we're gonna figure this out.

Georges! Let's go.

Well, Georges, this is not the time...

Come on, let's go.

Curtain!

- It's not working. It's stuck. - Well, free it, damn it!

- Pierrot, maybe you-- - No, I've had enough! Look at this.

But, Pierrot, listen!

Ah, that first contact with an audience!

Oh, my darling! - Martine.

Oh, my baby!

But what are you doing here?

What are you doing here in that ridiculous outfit?!

What does it mean? Albert, intervene!

Okay, listen to me. Listen to me, calm down!

And I'd advise you shut up! This is not the time!

And that's with my wife! With my wife!

I've forbidden you to do theater!

Come on, baby!

There, released!

Can't you just close the curtain?

- What's the matter? - Get off, I'm talking to my wife!

You know I've always I've always wanted to be in the theater!

In the theater, in the theater! Am I doing theater here?!

See, it's from Switzerland, but it's very good! It's wonderful!

- You have what? - My place?

Right here. Check it out.

- Oh, he's spoiled. - You think so?

- What's yours? - I got this one.

Let me see that.

It's ripening. It won't be long now.

What the hell is that thing? You're on stage!

How's your pain?

- What about you? - And me.

Let me through!

Come on, guys, let's go over there!

Hey, Albert, cover us!

- What do you call Yves? - Yves Gerard. Isn't he good?

- Do you know him? - A little.

I'd like to meet him.

This could be interesting.

But listen, my dear!

You don't think so, do you?

- Do you know him well? - I do.

You should have invite him in for a drink.

Try to arrange it.

It's warm...

that youth.

spontaneity.

Zero for Provence!

Now you're getting naked in front of everyone undressing in front of everyone?!

But I have to change.

- Change of clothes? - Uh, yeah, to number two.

Make it a pleasure, get dressed and hurry up!

Women, go home!

You have no right to ruin my career!

Exactly! Martina has such a temperament!

Temperament? You have no business with my wife's temperament!

Let him save his temperament save it for home!

Give her that dress and hurry up! - No, there's more!

Look, now is not the time.

And you, Albert, shut up!

- No, that's enough! - We need it for the room!

- Martin, get dressed! - Give her that dress!

That's my rinse!

Give me that dress right now!

- Hey, there's a photographer. - A photographer? О!

Oh, is that you?

Good evening!

What are you doing here? - Working.

I'm doing a report on Evelyn Dorsey.

- Evelyn Dorsey? - Mm-hmm.

Is she here?

- I'd like to see her. - Would I?

Well, I can see you.

- Say, will you introduce me? - What's that for?

Well, just for fun.

This could come in handy. For work.

Well, you know, don't think it's that easy.

Set it up for me, huh?

I'll see you soon.

But that's not the one.

You know, one or the other. I took the first one that came along.

Gentlemen?

Do you have tickets?

1,000 francs per person.

What's that?

Pardon me, monsieur.

Come on through! Hurry up, hurry up!

Excuse me, I have to get through. We have to get on with the program!

Excuse me, let me through!

All right, the dance is over!

Here, take this!

What? Why? What am I supposed to do with this?!

Watch out!

Hey, Andre, I was gonna say, uh. Hey, listen!

Most importantly. no Castanet Generals!

There are Mexican seniors.

So save your jokes. We're gonna have diplomatic complications.

Ladies and gentlemen! In addition to Yves Gerard's performance,

"Scarlet Rose has the honor and pleasure to present to you

new verse by the Jacques brothers!

The Jacques brothers are performing,

true athletes of song!

For starters. dynamic and energetic song

"March of the Footballers!

In bars and nightclubs

songs are sad and boring.

In noisy movie halls

you'll get bored in the crowd.

We can see those from afar,

who doesn't know the joy of the ball.

Keep all this nonsense away from us!

We - we love soccer!

There they are, the soccer players!

Fun and so young!

Fearlessly they rush into battle!

Cheer up, boys, and cheer up!

And long live the soccer players!

They fight skillfully,

these handsome heartbreakers!

That's what they are, soccer players!

It's a beautiful day!

We came from all over the neighborhood.

To watch an unprecedented match

To the cheers of all!

Look how under the sun

The rabid fans are crowding in,

Greeting with mad voices

Your knights of soccer!

Here come the soccer players.

Fun and so young!

Fearlessly they rush into battle!

Cheer up, boys, and cheer up!

Here they come on the field!

They're galloping merrily, with gusto!

They follow the sporting precepts,

everyone from the goalie to the captain.

And then there's the final effort,

that will reward their efforts. Oh, shit!

And the worthy winners

these are the true kings of soccer!

There they are, the soccer players!

Fun and so young!

Fearlessly they rush into battle!

Cheer up, boys, and cheer up!

Why were you looking at me looking at me like that?

Just what? When did you play?

You kept your eyes on me.

Yes... It's true...

As soon as I saw you.

I realized I was playing today just for you guys!

О!.. Oh, Evelyn!

To hold you close to me...

It's so tight. - Yeah?

Don Jose!

"Studio Matignon presents EVELYN DORSEY and Garonne in the movie

"CARMEN."

It's for you, Carmen, I killed them!

Now I am dishonored!

Love to you!

О!

Carmen!

Who the hell is that, a traitor?!

One of your lovers?

Totus? Toreador?

Oh, Carmen!

This body at our feet...

and this body, that I'm cradling in my arms.

This is the remorse of my love and the love of my remorse!

Come on, Jose, while there's still time!

With you, Carmen. to the ends of the earth.

What is this fatal blinding, that has chained me to you?!

- It's love, Don Jose! - А!

It's not blinding,

and the light!

Don't move! One more time, just in case.

That's not it at all!

Too much lyricism and savagery!

Hard to curb. Buy back the picture.

А? What? My wife, but what does that mean?

Why? It's simple, Matignon, buy back the photo.

You're not gonna let to release this to the press?!

But how can it be, my darling.

Uh, excuse me.

How much?

I get paid 10 grand.

- Ah, Evelyn, my dear! - Ah, hello!

- You're adorable! - Thank you. You're as beautiful as God.

- Oh, uh, you know. - How are you doing?

Oh, now I've got an interesting case.

No, look at that! He's making eyes at the star,

when the rest of us are doing the number! - I assure you...

Well, I'll show you! Let's go.

We should still get something to nibble on.

And now, "General Castagnettas."

exotic song by Marcel Dabadie,

to Reese's music.

He was born in Mexico City.

It was a strange subject...

Uh, no! There are no naked women here!

He was the greatest general in Mexico.

José de Las Castañettas.

He was truly amazing type!

It was ace! A big ace!

His mustache was like this.

Epaulettes like this.

Sombreros are this big.

But he wasn't that big himself.....

But...

He was the greatest general in Mexico.

José de Las Castañettas.

But you have to be very careful

with these revolutions.

Otherwise, no way, no how.

you could get a bullet in the head.

His death would be for the nation

a terrible loss!

And for that very reason.

he never left the house!

He was the greatest general in Mexico.

José de Las Castañettas.

He was truly amazing type!

It was ace! A big ace!

He had medals... how many!

A gas mask. like this!

Two arquebuses... - No, not two!

Three arquebuses!

These are the kind of...

Only he himself was like this...

No! Not like that! That's the one!

But...

He was the greatest general in Mexico.

José de Las Castañettas.

Suddenly, however, he was needed.

They came for him in the middle of the night.

This time in the country.

smells a little bit like fried food.

"My general! Courage, courage!"

"Get up there!" -

told him.

But he was so very surprised,

that he died in bed!

He was the greatest general in Mexico.

José de Las Castañettas!

They gave him an amazing funeral!

A national funeral!

With tears - like this...

With wreaths like this.

With speeches - long ones like this.....

And he was like this.

But...

He was the greatest general in Mexico.

They're not the only ones!

We've seen so many!

Small, tall, fat, fat, fat.

Small, tall, fat, fat, fat.

Anda!

- What's up? - What?

- Mexicans! - Oh, I forgot about them!

- What Mexicans? - What does that mean?

There are Mexican generals in the audience! I told that lunatic!

So, you know, Castagnettas are a godsend!

- What a fool! - You couldn't tell me?!

Leave me alone! My teeth hurt!

- Do your teeth hurt?! - And what, real Mexicans?

- So? - Generals?

- How many are there? - Four!

Four! One for each!

And they have, I guarantee you, their teeth don't hurt!

Ooh-la-la-la! That's just what I needed!

How do we get out of it now?

You're mestizo, you'll pass for Guatemalan.

Hey, don't you guys hear that?

That's exactly what that's all you hear!

Well, it doesn't get any better than this.

They insist on their number,

and when people applaud, they don't want to come out!

Come on, get out!

And now our song by Jacques Broya and Jean Gigot.

"White Wands Gavotte."

Can you believe it? they're doing it again!

Night is descending.

A shadow spreads out.

It doesn't feel right!

Where is it, Jesus?

From the horrible screaming

my hair stands on end!

A long shiver tickles my nerves.

There's crime in the air!

The shadows of murderers roam here!

The strangler must be is out there somewhere!

But we are, patrol officers,

we listen to it without excitement.

We are the champions of the white wands!

We're not killers!

If someone is robbing, or burns or steals,

our rule is don't move!

It's not easy for us, because we're brave!

In order not to see it, we close our eyes!

If we'd heard, we would have jumped, of course.

But what will the cars and pedestrians cars and pedestrians?

Everybody's gonna blend in, crash into each other.

You won't get far that way!

You won't get far!

But we are the champions of the white wands.

You have to see nothing or pretend to.

If you feel like there's a lot of crime there's a lot of crime on the block,

go to the warden.

- Hey, you on the bike! - Hey, you, on the bike!

So, we're in violation, huh?

- Protest? - We'll fine you!

Next time. you'll think!

What frosty weather!

You can't put a patrolman on the street!

Just when you think that there's someone sitting inside

and drinks boiling delicious grog!

And in the meantime. we have to write protocols,

With a sniffling nose, shrinking from the cold.

In her black slippers on her little feet,

We poor little darlings like ice!

And people in a bad mood when they're in a bad mood,

That every quarter of an hour. drivers

They call us assholes, corrupt, stupid,

Old junk and that's not all!

Being completely deaf, we answer them nothing.

We have to be careful, or you'll get it!

But in my little book. with a trembling hand

We'll write his name down!

Well, and then we're gonna go back we'll start twirling the white baton again.

And we'll say to ourselves: "Just 15 more years,

and we'll retire and we'll be like all the other pedestrians

"call the cops all sorts of names to call the cops names."

Now let's get to work! Stop having fun! Let's get to work!

Well, what are you waiting for? Get changed!

- You again?! - Oh, give me a break!

- They're here! They're here! - Who?

- Generals! - Ooh-la-la-la!

And I forbid you to perform! You hear me?!

If you dare. - That's right, they're here.

Well, they're not gonna start a revolution here, are they?

- Did you swallow it? - Milk!

Hurry up! Milk!

Hey, what about my medicine?

- You're coming out now! - But he took my medicine!

Get in there! This is just it's a disaster!

Who are these guys?

Put this on, chick. Here, cover yourself up!

No, come on! Gentlemen of the military!

Stop it! What? Ah!

Signores, per favore, but! No tushar a signorina!

Gentlemen! I invite you to drink lemonade! At the bar!

Here - but, but, but. Fer pas tene, per favore!

Why are you speaking to them in Italian?

What's the difference! It's the same thing!

In continuation of our program.

Yves Gerard's troupe presents to you

concert

"Ballet of the Melomaniacs."

Bravo! Bravo!

Bravo!

- Thank you, ma'am. - Thank you, ma'am.

Oh, Evelyn!

Ever since I saw you in "Anna Karenina."

in "Madame Bovary."

in Manon Lescaut.

Carmen!

This is what I did for my Carmen!

Oh, my Ho-Ho, why did you do that?

I couldn't resist!

It's either him or me!

Ah, my Ho-Ho, sweet Ho-Ho!

You're my sweetheart!

We have to be careful!

Oh, Jose, we're being followed! We're being spied on!

If it's a bullfighter, that's enough! One is enough for me!

What?!

Are you scared?!

My gentle Jose?

Me? Scared?

My darling!

- After all, darling! - But that's not it at all!

Too light, too fidgety, not enough weight!

- But how come! - It's like this!

We have to buy back the pictures! It's so easy!

What the hell is going on?!

With this one, you could you could expect anything!

- What is it again? - Hurry up, hurry up!

No, well, not now! Come on!

So, Moni, how do you like me?

- Very, very good, baby! - Is it true?

It can't go on like this!

What I said, it's like I had a premonition!

- You're not going to hit a woman, are you?! - A woman?

What woman? That's my wife!

You go home, and hurry up!

Martina is my partner, and she's going to play with me!

With you?! She's gonna play with me!

She'll play at home! Daddy and Mommy!

Oh, caramba! Saludos, amigos!

There they go again!

- Sorry, sweetie. - Oh, is that you?

What's wrong with you? You're introducing me to her?!

- Producer! - Producer?

- The lover! He's coming! - Is he coming?

- Hold on, I'll get organized. - I hope you do!

Listen, darling! Well, not with the military?!

Don't be so stupid, Matignon!

- Well? - No, not here!

It's not quiet enough in here. To the bistro!

He's waiting for you at the bistro across the street. Hurry up!

- Well? - Don't worry, sweetie,

I've got it all organized. - Oh, thank you! You did great.

- Where do I find her? - Shh. She'll be right back.

And I'll be right back.

Mr. Maréchal, please.

Oh, come on, dear baby!

This is...

is it for mademoiselle...? - Martoun.

Look at that at that little prankster!

What do they find in him?

Here, Mr. Maréchal. While you're here.

Hey, Andre!

- 6 double whiskeys. - Got any coins?

Don't worry. 6 double whiskeys.

Go ahead? Okay, I'm coming.

Mr. Maréchal, please give me your autograph!

Yes, of course.

- Where do I sign? - Right here.

Here? Here.

- Here too, Mr. Maréchal. - Yes, with pleasure!

- Thank you. - Here, Mr. Maréchal.

Yes?

Thank you!

Cavities! I need a filling!

You have to pull it out! Bad tooth needs to come out!

It's crazy!

- Montmartre? Oh, no, not now!

- Where's Albert? I don't know.

- What's wrong with you? - Let me see!

- Could it be a molar? - No, it's not a molar. It's not a molar.

Open wide, you can't see anything!

No, it's not indigenous!

It may not be a molar, but it's still bad!

Open your mouth, darling!

Your water has warmed.

Montmartre?

One more.

Let me see!

Hold this, please.

Why were you just looking at me like that?

О! Oh, my God! My gentle Jose!

Did he hurt you?!

Carmen! Watch out! My molar!

What about me?

This one's getting in the way underfoot!

Oh, my God! He hurt you, my gentle Jose!

О! He doesn't have a molar!

- What do you mean, not native? - No. Look at this!

By the way, I was at the warehouse.

For a toothache, there's nothing better than alcohol!

And if you swallow it, wouldn't that be dangerous?!

Oh, no! Not now!

Come on, Jose, while there's still time!

Jose is him!

Listen to me!

Make up your mind already!

О! Will you join us?

Yes! It won't hurt!

- Another round? - No doubt about it!

- Damn Carmen, eh! - Mr. Cognac!

You didn't pay me! - There he goes again!

Give me the bottle back, I didn't give it to you!

That's my rinse!

Mind you, there's nothing better than rinsing,

to fix a man!

Nothing better!

Oh, and for the wisdom tooth. it helps, too!

Let me remind you that wisdom teeth ...

You have to rip it out!

Cool!

Is he kidding me or something?

The magic of the circle...

globe myth...

the complexity of the circle...

Did you heat up some food for me?

Imagine just a rudder in the form of a yearling.

Something so round...

- What did you want? - It's perfectly round!

Oh, yes, indeed.

Hey, you two! I'm waiting for you! Let's get to work!

We...

we're sick! - Well, yeah.

Hurry up! Something for your teeth!

What? - Oh! You!

Are you crazy? Where did the others go?

- Don't worry, I found them! - Find them as soon as you can!

- Here, Warden! - He didn't see us!

- Say, do you have a minute? - Yes, yes, of course I do. Now!

"NIGHT PARIS"

Everybody out, please! [Siren wailing]

Ladies and gentlemen, we are now at St. Germain de Pré!

A gathering place for Jean-Paul Sartre and existentialists!

Our stop in Paris at night!

All right! Well, where are the others?

How should I know?!

Oh, what a night!

First there was no troupe, then there were two,

and now it's gone again! Well, what do we do now?

A five-minute stop at the existentialist club! (gasps)

Yes! It's "The Scarlet Rose!" Five minutes, please! This way!

This way! Come on in!

Okay, uh. Hey, guys! Hey, there, night light! Keep it down!

Hey, there! Clarinet! Shh!

And now, ladies and gentlemen, take a 15-minute recess,

during which you will listen

our orchestra!

- Have you seen Yves Gerard? - No, I haven't.

Why were you just looking at me like that?

I could feel your eyes looking right at me.

They were burning, devouring me.... - Come here.

No, not that way. This way!

Listen, have you seen Evelyn Dorsey?

- I did. She went that way. - That way?

Have you seen Yves Gerard?

- I did. He went that way. - That way?

Oh, Evelyn!

We're alone at last! Alone, alone!

Why were you just looking at me like that?

- What's the matter with you? - I thought you were used to this?

What's the idea dragging people up on the roof?

What do you mean? But it's you.

Well, yes, of course! Я!

Of course! Everyone knows that I spend my life on the roof!

Tell me something, my friend!

You wouldn't happen to have seen Evelyn Dorsey?

Over there!

Evelyn! My Evelyn!

Carmen! Not Evelyn, Carmen!

Carmen! My Carmen!

Your mustache!

I beg your pardon?

- Unstick your mustache! - А!...

Carmen! My Carmen!

To be alone with you

under this beautiful Spanish sky. О!

Have you seen Evelyn Dorsey?

Did you happen to...

- Your mustache! - But I already took it off!

Glue it back on. I prefer you with a mustache.

Ah...

Evelyn! Carmen!

Carmen! For you. I'll grow a mustache!

The beard! I'll grow anything whatever you want!

Evelyn Dorsay

Residents are asked to give their name after 10:00 p.m.

Don't let me go!

How can I get you--

How can I let you go if you're the one holding me!

Thank you.

Don't let me go, I'm dizzy!

Then come down! If you're dizzy!

I'm telling you, I'm dizzy!

Don't leave me!

Don't quit!

Jean Maréchal!

What a nice surprise!

What are you doing here?

Honestly, I don't know myself.

But here, having met you.

is no longer an issue.

- Oh, Mr. Maréchal! - Yes?

Do you remember how your scene began in Love Is Always Love?

"Love is always love"? Yes! Exactly!

- And how you tell her: - Yes...

"Since you hate me,

that means you still love me!" - I do.

"That's when you stop "when you stop hating me,

then. - Then...

"I'll realize that you've fallen out of love with me!"

Shit! That's not Evelyn Dorsay.

Just wasted a shot.

So now madame continues her career on the roof?

I wish I knew that you're still on it!

Me?! What do you mean?

Chasing Evelyn Dorsey!

You have a very appetizing career! - Come on, baby!

You're making me nervous!

Wow! Wow! You're keeping up too!

Just so you know, the current Evelyn Dorsay,

with this bullfight of yours is starting to bore me!

Oh, you're my fat bear!

Oh, wow! Mishka!

You called me a teddy bear, like you used to!

Yeah, we're not getting any younger!

That was a good time! Come on, sit down!

You remember, don't you?

- Of course I remember! - "Mad Javelin"!

I'm a shamrock with 4 leaves!

I bring happiness to everyone!

One leaf for you, sir. Another leaf for you, monsieur!

And I used to scare the kids to tears!

Because of that hair!

Well, yes, of course. That was in the good old days.

- Good times. - Oh, yes, my little V!

- That's who I need. You! - Is it true?

We could put hair on you.

- Oh, yeah. - And sideburns.

What are you doing here?

Wait!

That's it. I saved you!

Don't leave me, I'm dizzy!

I'm not leaving you, I'm not leaving you!

I'm running, hi!

What's that asshole doing here?

Take your seat! - Where's the director?!

You never know anything! I'm leaving!

So where's the director? Where are the writers?

What?

The director and the writers? Where are they?

- In the bistro, as usual! - He knows!

The bistro! Well, I'm going to tell them!

- He's the last thing we need around here! - All right!

Tell me, what am I doing in this story?

You've written a funny role of a party boy you wrote for me!

I already have eight reels of movie, but what am I doing there? Question!!!

A replica here, a replica there.

I'm running left, right. But other than that, nothing!

And anyway! Where's my scene with Evelyn Dorsay!

Everyone had one, even Tonio!

What about me? I have a contract, by the way!

It's signed at the bottom! Read it, Mr. Fabiro!

Signed at the bottom, in black and white!

Well, what am I supposed to do?

I can do anything, just say the word!

Improv? Please!

No, something funny, comical!

No, it doesn't fit either.

Something airy, romantic, emotional.

No. Something original!

I'm behind the empty backstage, alone with Evelyn Dorsay.

Suddenly. the scenery dissolves,

disappear. We're in Spain!

Arid desert land.

Carmen's here. She's alone. She's waiting for me!

О! It's very beautiful!

That's right!

And I come on horseback, at a great gallop.

Evelyn! Carmen!

Carmen!

Well, that's out of line!

Now there's a horse!

Who the hell is that? Where's Carmen?!

I don't know, man! I've had enough! I'm outta here!

Where to? You're not going to leave me.

Oh, sorry, I'll be right back. Hey, listen!

What do you want me to say?

I've only had five lines I've only had five lines!

5, you hear me? I counted them: "Get outta here!"

"What is this?" And lastly, "Ah, you bastards!"

And the role is over! You call that a character?!

That's a shame!

Well, where are we all in this movie? А? Where?

And the jokes? There are no jokes!

How much advice I could give you advice!

You take the hat! That's so funny. You take the hat.

You pour water in it. The other guy puts it on without noticing.

It's hilarious, it's hilarious! Can you believe it?

For example! Where are they now? They're all on the roof! All of them!

What do you mean, on the roof?

So, what about me? I'm not on the roof?

On the roof? Are you crazy? It's been over for a while.

It's all backstage! - Backstage?

Come on, hurry up. You're the only thing you're the only ones missing from the playground.

Come on, everybody backstage.

Backstage... Everybody backstage now.

What are you doing here? And bowing? Go!

Come on! Get out! - Let's go, let's go.

They didn't look not very happy.

Never mind. White wine!

In big glasses, huh?

But they're all here?! What does that mean?

Evelyn!

Evelyn! Evelyn!

Go have some wine. You too! Wine! There!

Evelyn!

All right! Let's get to work! Come on, everybody!

I can't take it anymore, my dear!

What have you got there? What's that, huh?

- I'm coming! - Coming? Here, take this!

Martine, I'm begging you to get dressed!

- Yes! - What are you doing? Are you crazy?

But in order to dress the way you want me to dress, I have to take my clothes off first!

Evelyn, we're with you...

- I said get to work! - Back to work.

How about this? Something military?

Not either? Ah!

It's starting all over again! Enough!

Evelyn, at your service! - Yes!

- I said get to work! - Everybody get to work.

How many times can you do this, my darling?!

Yeah, no kidding?

- Montmartre? - Montmartre? Yes, yes, now!

Ladies and gentlemen!

One day, in the back lot of a slightly overcrowded C bus.

Ladies and gentlemen...

I am Carmen, the beautiful gypsy.

I keep looking for Don José.

It's you, Carmen, the beautiful gypsy.

You keep looking for Don José!

That's her, Carmen, the beautiful gypsy!

And I'm her Don Jose!

A snapshot, please!

For only 10,000 francs! For nothing!

Come on, darling! 0-0 for Provence!

Ladies and gentlemen! Once upon a time.

Carmen?! My little Vee-wee!

And I have...

And I have...

Ladies and gentlemen! One day on the back lot.

Ladies and gentlemen! One day. in the back of the C bus.

Go get dressed! Go home!

Oh, come on, my darling!

Where's the alley? Have you seen the alley?

Hurry up! In 5 minutes. to Montmartre! (English)

Get out of here!

I'm Carmen, the beautiful gypsy!

I've been looking for Don Jose!

Come on, darling! 0-0 for Provence!

A snapshot, please!

I want my checkbook back my checkbook!

I'm Carmen, the beautiful gypsy.

I've been looking for Don Jose!

It's us, we're her Don José!

It's us, Jose's dons! We're all her Don José!

Poor Matignon! What a stupid idea to bring me here!

Oh, come on, sweetheart, you're the one who's been--

All these artists...

My darling!

Buona sera, signore!

That was a good laugh, huh?!

It's a good play.

So you're going back to Mexico?

Oh, I'm sorry! Not Mexico?

А! What country?

What?

Aya-baya?

Yes... Yes, yes, yes!

Ko-ko! Yes!

Double whiskey!

Jean Maréchal is thirsty!

Mr. Maréchal, would you like to pay?

What do you mean, pay up?

Mr. Maréchal's account for 30,000 francs.

30,000 francs for just one drink?!

But, Monsieur Maréchal treated a lot of young people!

And young girls!

How? Did I treat young people?! What the--

I'll do it. I will not tolerate it, monsieur!

Do you hear that?! This is an abuse of trust!

Do you understand? Attempted fraud!

Get me a patron! Call the police!

Call security!

All right! What did you did you just want to ask me?

Do you? Is there something you want?

Why are you suddenly "pooping"? What's wrong with you?

Go warm up my stew quickly!

It's you, I recognize you!

There's something different about you!

I'll get you some!

And, of course, we never got never got off the ground.

It's him!

It's true! That's just what I need!

Look at this passion...

on that brutality!

But Matignon, why didn't we think of this before? we didn't think of this before?!

How could you, my dear!

Ah, my dear Mareschal!

So, shall we reunite the famous couple Mareschal to Evelyn Dorsey?!

- Э... I wanted to ask you something. - What?

Oh, yeah! Did you want to ask me to ask me something?

Yes! I was wondering,

if you could lend me lend me 2,000 francs?

А!

- Yeah. Me too. - You too what?

I've been meaning to ask you the same thing,

could you lend me 2,000 francs?

Oh, is that so?

Well, yeah.

Mind you, you could have told me you could have told me!

How curious!

You have such a changeable face!

It's you,

or all of a sudden, all of a sudden, you're different.

I'm warning you,

me or the other, 2,000 francs is still gone.

Won't it hurt you?

Oh, I can feel it, what I'm gonna have.

And I will have...

Well, it's better that way.

Let's go get better!

You know this guy?

- No. You? - Me neither.

Cab! Hey, cab!

32, Avenue de Perle.

Oh, a cab! You're taking us, huh?

Hey, wait! What does that mean?

Cab, cab! Here!

Sit down!

Evelyn Dorsay - Jean Maréchal "CARMEN."

Have a seat.

Tomorrow. 3 o'clock. The Eiffel Tower!

Michael! Come back!

All right, sit down quickly!

END

Transcript and subtitles: Lisok (Lisochek)