Original subtitles

The sleeve attaches to the Pendaflex folder...

between the second and fourth slots from the left.

We've done the same with one of these peel-off stickers. It goes right on the file folder.

Now, each file folder needs to go into its own Pendaflex folder.

You have to make sure it's the appropriate Pendaflex folder.

Wh-Why does it have to be on the inside folder and the outside folder?

- The case number? - Yes.

Because it's the key to the entire system.

It also goes on the report. All pages.

You punch it with a two-hole punch.

You attach it to the file folder on this two-prong fastener.

That way, nothing ever gets lost.

Now, misdemeanours go in here.

And felonies go in there.

Hey, plenty of room in there.

Why do you think I'm leavin'? Caseload number's also on the daily caseload sheet.

And today, for example, we have two... count 'em, two... calls.

Both of 'em down at the pier.

If we drag our feet, they can carry us through to lunch.

- Happy Birthday, Katie. - Thanks, Scott.

Hey, could you give me a call sometime today on the radio?

- Call you? About what? - I don't know.

Make something up. I'm beginning to think the damn thing's busted.

Police officer! Out of my way!

- Mornin'. - Mornin', Petey. Dave!

Scott?

Scott?

Scott, I made some muffins for you to take with you.

Oh, you didn't have to do that, Mrs Remington.

God bless you in that awful city.

We're all hoping that you don't get shot.

Poor boy.

What?

Seat belt, seat belt, seat belt. It's the law.

Thank you.

- Ah-ah-ah-ah. - Oh, come on, man.

I can't sit here and smell these without havin' at least one.

All right, all right, all right, all right.

- Just make sure it's just one. - Thank you.

How many days do you have left?

- Three. - Good. Real good.

- Why? Am I getting on your nerves? - Oh, no.

I mean, I really appreciate your showing me the ropes this week...

lettin' me ride around in your nice, clean car,

and treating me like a full-fledged detective.

- Investigator. - Whatever. But, Scott, when are you going to learn to relax?

- I am relaxed. - Mm-mm.

I'm not talkin' about the small "R." I'm talkin' about the big "R."

You know, "Top of Old Smoky. "

- You mean, when am I going to get laid? - Hey.

Oh, well, I... It's already been four times this morning.

I'm exhausted.

Okay, come on, boys. Mama's gonna be mad.

- Mr Boyett. - Hey, Scott. How are you doing? I hear we're losing you.

Ah, yeah, 'fraid so, 'fraid so. This is David Sutton. He'll be replacing me.

- Mister Boyett. - Come on, boys.

Uh, we came down to tell you that...

That they found your dinghy over in Moss Landing.

You should send somebody to go pick it up.

Yeah, well, thanks. I never thought I'd get to see that again.

Hey, Scott, could you, uh, show the boys your, uh, badge?

- They never saw a detective's badge before. - Sure.

- He's a detective? - Nope, an investigator.

- I don't know, Dad. Looks kind of fake to me. - Fake?

Hey, kid, you wanna spend some time in jail?

- Cute kids. - Yeah, well, yeah. Kids.

Need four hands!

Amos!

Amos!

- Who's there? - It's me! Scott!

Oh. Let me get a leash on him.

Yeah, do that! Please! Thank you.

Amen.

Hey, hey, hey. Hey, I brought you a muffin, boy.

Here's a muffin for ya. Nice little muffin, Hooch.

See the muffin? See the muffin, Hooch?

Here's the muffin for Hooch!

I brought a muffin for ya! The muffin, Hooch!

Hooch, the muffin! The muffin, Hooch!

- Medic! - Hooch! Come here!

Amos? Amos.

Let him go, Hooch. Let go of him, Hooch.

Hooch. Drop him. Drop him, Hooch.

I- I'm sorry, Scott. I don't have the hand strength I used to.

- You're okay, aren't ya? Huh? - Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine.

I was lookin' forward to a nice, quiet cup of coffee.

- But now I'm awake! - Don't let him see that you're angry.

H- He has a sensitive spot. He reacts real bad to anger.

What is the matter with him? I brought him a muffin. He knows me!

What, "know ya"? He didn't even break the skin.

Why, this dog loves ya, boy.

Let's go on up to the house and we'll all have a cookie.

Come on, Hooch. Let's go, boy. Come on.

Doc says I shouldn't give him these chocolate chips.

Uh, what do you say about that, Hooch?

I thought so.

Well, I'm here, Amos. What's the complaint this time?

Them. That seafood plant.

There's somethin' goin' on over there.

- Oh, they're okay, other than a stolen dinghy. - No, it isn't.

It's worse than it was before.

There's always some strange noises goin' on at night.

Well, you're always telling me you don't hear like you used to any more.

Well, I don't hear it. Hooch hears it.

- He tells me. - Oh.

Hooch tells you about it.

Well, uh, you live in a pretty industrial area, Amos.

If you want peace and quiet, I suggest you move to a nice apartment somewhere.

Me and Hooch in an apartment?

Yeah, that'd be the sight.

I- I thought you didn't mind comin' around here.

Oh, I don't mind comin' down here.

It's just, uh, I'm-I'm leaving on Monday, remember?

Now, the guy who's replacing me... Sutton...

he's not gonna want to come down and talk to you like I do,

because he's, well, he's scared to death of your dog.

I can't figure out why.

Whoa, all right! Hey, all right! That-That's good! Huh?

Yeah, just sit there. Drool over yourself.

Gave 'im whisky once.

Then he howled all night. Now he sticks to beer.

- You want some? - No. No.

Thank you, I'm not on Hooch's hours.

Well, I-I-I really have to get goin'.

Oh. Movin' up to the big city, huh?

Yeah.

Well, maybe me and Hooch could come and visit.

You? Anytime.

Hooch, uh... Sacramento is the state capital.

I think they have laws against dogs like Hooch.

Oh, stop. It's not that funny.

Sorry, man. I can't help it.

Every time I think about it... I nearly wet my pants!

So do I. That's why it's not funny.

Delta One, Delta One.

Hey, Katie. Turner can't come to the phone right now.

- He's got a dog on this throat. - Now, now. Just say "thank you,"

and then we're, that we're clear.

Thanks for the radio check, Katie. We're clear.

No, it's business, Turner. Some kids found money on Pinecone Beach.

So far they've counted $8,000.

- All right, we'll be right there, sure. - Katie, we're on the way, pronto.

- Mrs Harper? - Oh. Okay.

First I thought it was play money. They had it scattered all over the road.

- Wow. - Then, when I realized it was real,

I had them show me where they found it so I could show you.

Do you suppose, uh, more money'll wash up here?

- Well, I wouldn't count on it. - Uh, here's how this works.

If no one claims it or identifies it in 30 days, it's yours.

- Oh. - I found it. It's mine.

- She can't have any. - Stop!

Well, I'm confiscating it, and if you do get it,

you have to use it for college. It's the law.

- See? - We have some forms you're gonna need to fill out, Mrs Harper.

Yes. Stop that!

She wanted a formal church wedding, and I said fine.

Suddenly, it's two grand for a wedding dress,

reception with a full bar for 400,

and I'm gonna end up pickin' up the tab for the honeymoon.

They're talkin' Bora Bora.

There he is now. Didn't you want to talk to him?

Yeah. Ferraday! Want to talk to you.

Ferraday, I'm talkin' to you!

Right there! What's the hurry?

Hooch! Be quiet.

For Christ's sake.

You know, I feel like an ass.

I mean, I take you in, I give you my trust, and what do you do?

You take the food off my kid's plate.

It was there. I- I just lost my head.

It won't happen again, Mr Boyett.

Quiet!

Casey, get rid of him. Zack, see if the old man saw anything.

Deal with it.

- Hi, there. - You get out of here.

- You back off! - I hope I didn't disturb you.

You know, I realize we were making sort of a racket over there.

In fact, I-I saw your light come on over here, I realized I woke you up,

and I thought I'd better come over and make sure everything's all right.

Well, you just mind your own business. This is private property.

Okay, but you know what? I'm thinking if we disturbed you,

I ought to compensate you a little bit, just to make up for any inconvenience...

I don't want any of your money. I've been watching you.

I've been seeing what you're doing over there.

Hey, wait a minute. I can assure you, we're doing nothing wrong over there.

- You get the hell off my dock! - Don't!

No, don't you shove me. You understand?

I'm gonna introduce you to my dog.

Jesus.

Hello. Yeah. Yeah, I am now.

Uh, I'll-I'll be right there.

- Yo. - Really? Turn around.

The dog was guardin' the body. They had to wrestle him inside.

- Ah, d-d-did you talk to anybody? - Nobody heard or saw anything.

Seafood workers spotted the body.

- You ever investigate a murder before? - Are you kiddin'?

- I moved here to get away from murder scenes. - Well, everybody's watchin',

so let's look like we've done this before.

All right. I got five rolls of film.

Burn it up.

Great, it's those jerks from the Sheriff's Department.

Hi, guys.

Hello there, ladies.

We'll, uh, call you if we need any help, Turner.

Foster and McCabe. Glad to see you. I need coffee, with cream.

- Do you take sugar? - Two sugars.

- Two sugars. - That's cute. Look, in the spirit of cooperation,

I'd love it if you guys would get the hell out of here. Is that okay?

The pier is our jurisdiction, guys.

Yeah, but the entire county's the Sheriff's jurisdiction. You know that.

This is police work, not a lost bicycle.

Excuse me.

What is this, a joke?

Come on, every little speck of dirt is not evidence.

What are you going to do, Turner? Put the entire pier in a little baggie?

- What is that for? - To preserve what's ever underneath the fingernails.

For what? He was stabbed in the back, for cryin' out loud.

You can never anticipate what evidence is going to be important.

- You gather it now, analyse it later. - Right.

Did you read that in a book?

Yeah. Yeah. I did read that in a book.

It was a great big blue book, but I think you woulda liked it. It had a lot of pictures!

Hey, wait a second. We're all upset here.

Why don't we just cooperate? We all get our jobs done.

Hey, we'd just like to examine the body. Before it decomposes, you know.

Aw...

Just gimme a minute with my guys, would ya, please?

- Not a problem. - Thanks.

Tell ya, Scott, we're gonna have to turn this over to the Sheriff's Department.

Why? Why? They couldn't find shoes in a shoe box.

Well, you're leavin' town in a few days, David doesn't have enough experience...

- to handle a murder investigation... - Oh, yeah, but wait.

I don't have to be in Sacramento for a whole other week. I was going to take a vacation.

I'll just... I'll just cancel it. I'll just canc...

- We can handle this. David's a very good learner. - Turner's a hell of a teacher.

What's the point of having investigators on your police force...

if all we get to investigate is stolen mailboxes?

Come on. Howard, I got another pay cheque coming. Let me earn it.

We can handle this. We won't let you down.

We deserve a shot at it!

All right, just do the best job you can with the time you got. All right?

- All right. - All right. - All right.

What do we got?

Okay. Well, we're willing to share the lab reports with you,

and we'll let you examine any evidence that we gather. Fair enough?

- Oh, no. Not fair. - Not fair.

Sounds fair enough to me.

Oh, excuse me. Are you goin' in there with just these things?

We do this for a living. Stay out of the way.

Take this stuff. Make sure that these are all eight by ten glossies.

- Cut it out! - Why? Get goin'.

Get out of the way! Wait!

I got him!

Turn it around. Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Pull, pull, pull!

- Get him around. Easy, easy, easy! - Here he is! Here he is!

Oh, my God! Whoa!

Back him up. Bad dog!

Good boy, good boy. Come on, this way. Over here, boy.

Whoa! Oh! Oh!

Oh! Whoa! Slow down, boy.

This... This dog's nuts.

- We're gonna have to shoot him. - Hey, you're not gonna shoot this dog.

He's the closest thing we have to a witness.

Oh, yeah? You think you can handle him?

You're nuts.

Where are you goin'?

He just responds poorly to anger, that's all.

- Uh, David! - What?

David, bring the car around.

Up as close as you can. Open up the back doors and leave the engine running.

Hey, there, Hooch.

Hey, you s... You saw the whole thing, didn't ya?

Yeah, well, Amos is gone now, so, uh...

You don't have a lot of options.

Okay? You are either gonna work with me, or they're gonna shoot you.

Come on. What I'm gonna do is, I'm gonna try...

I'm go... I'm gonna try to make you a little more...

a little more comfortable, huh?

Oh, don't you just want to think about it?

Huh? Huh? Here. Here. Here. Watch. Watch. Watch.

Uh, how do you do this?

Let me just... make ya a little... more... Oh, there.

There, there. Isn't that nice? Think about it.

Maybe we'll get some nice big chocolate chip cookies.

Yeah. Nice big box of chocolate chip cookies.

The soft kind? The kind with the 22 chips? Want a cookie?

The ki...

Want a cookie?

Come on, Hooch, get in the car!

- Come on, boy. - You people over there, get back.

Come on!

- Come on! - Move it back.

- He's got it under control. Stay out of the way. - Come on, Hooch. Come on, boy.

Aw, goddam it!

Hooch!

Oh, yeah, yeah!

What, you tired? Huh? Hope so.

If you are, it's just too bad. Now, look out. Look out.

Come on.

Too bad, all right. Hold on. Hold on. Wait a minute.

Hey, you're goin' in the clinic for a few days, pal.

It's gonna be good for ya. Come on.

Come on! Come on. Come on.

Come on, Hooch. Come... Come on.

Come... Wait a... Whoa! Hooch!

Hooch, no! Stop! Stop! Hooch!

Hooch! Stop! No!

I'll kill ya. No, Hooch!

Hey, what are you doing to this dog?

- Ow. Ohh! Just taking him for a walk. - Well, he's bleeding.

- My God, how long has he been bleeding? - Not long enough.

- You! I'll kill ya. - Hey. Now, I have a front door, you know.

- I'll shoot you, Hooch. I'll shoot you, Hooch. - Well, you stay there.

- You just stay right there. - Fix him up so I can shoot him.

All right. All done. You stay.

- What's your dog's name? - Uh, uh, his name is Hooch, but...

Those wounds needed stitching.

- When was the last time he saw a vet? - I don't know.

Well, that's neglect. And it's borderline abuse. I mean, he's filthy.

His diet is terrible, and look, if you cannot...

Well, no, hey, no, this is not my dog.

He belonged to an old man who lived down by the pier.

- Well, then, I want to speak to him. - You can't.

- He was murdered last night. - Whoa. God.

I'm Scott Turner, I'm the, um, police investigator here in town...

I know. I mean, we use the same bank. Emily Carson.

- Oh, we do? Oh. Well. Oh. - Yes. Yes.

- I'm sorta new here, but it's a small town, so... - It's ni-nice to meet you.

- I'm sorry about this misunderstanding. - That's quite all right.

I can't stand seeing animals mistreated.

- Can I ask you a question regarding the dog? - Yes. Come in.

There's a good chance, I think, that he was a witness to the, uh, crime.

He may have to identify a suspect. Can he do that?

- Yes. Maybe. - Can I show him, like, a photograph?

Like a, like a mug shot? And...

- You don't know much about dogs, do you? - Well, no, I n-never had one.

- Not even as a kid? - N-No. No way.

Well, dogs don't see in two dimensions.

I mean, he could recognize a voice, or a scent, but not a photo.

- All right. All right. - Come on, Hooch. Come on!

Uh, doesn't he have to... recoup?

Well, no. He's a little tired, but he's okay.

You're a good "dawg. " Yes.

- Boy, you sure are good with animals. - Yeah. I'm a vet.

You're buttering me up for something.

Well, I-I just can't help but think that this dog is gonna be a lot better off...

with someone like you, than with someone like me.

- 'Cause I-I don't know... Thank you. - Are you married?

No.

- You live alone, then? - Yeah.

- House, or an apartment? - House.

Yeah? You have a girlfriend?

- No. - Well, perfect.

- Perfect? Perfect for who? - Perfect for Hooch.

- For Hoo... How? - When you're home, he'll keep you company,

and when you're gone, he'll take care of your house.

- You're lucky to have him. - Oh, no, no, no, no. I don't have room for a dog like Hooch.

Not many people do. I gotta go work. Goodbye, Scott Turner.

What?

What? What is it? What? What?

Are ya... If you're hungry, finish the hamburgers. Ya... Eat the buns.

Eat the buns. If you're not thirsty...

You know, you're not touching the water, the orange juice, cranapple.

What is it? What am I supposed to do?

Make you a margarita?

Shut up! God!

Shut up! This has been going on for two and a half hours.

Just be quiet!

A- All right. All right. All right. You tell me what I'm supposed to do.

You tell me what I am supposed to do. What am I supposed to do?

You tell me. What am I supposed to do?

What am I supposed to do, Hooch?

Am I supposed to stand out on the porch all night long?

Give him a Valium, Turner. Take one yourself.

Hey, shut up! I'm a policeman.

Gu... Want your car towed?

Man, I hate you.

Oh, no!

Aah! You!

Aw, ya stupid dog!

No.

Ah, ya stupid dog!

Oh, you wanna chew my head off?

Go ahead. You'll be trapped inside and you'll starve to death.

That is, if they don't find my body first and then shoot you.

You're in my house. Back off. I'm comin' in.

Back off, Hooch!

Back off.

Back.

All right.

If we're gonna get along, we're gonna have to come to a certain understanding.

These are the simple rules: No barking.

No growling. You will not lift your leg to anything in this house.

This is not your room.

No slobbering. No chewing.

You will wear a flea collar.

This is not your room.

No begging for food. No sniffing of crotches.

And you will not drink from my toilet.

This is not your room.

This is your room.

The rest of the house is mine,

and when I come back into my house,

I like to find everything where I put it.

Everything in its place. Now, you don't touch my stuff.

And I certainly won't touch any of yours.

Well, this is the room to do that.

This is your bed.

You follow these very simple rules...

and shut up,

we'll get along fine.

Hey, Scott.

So what does it tell you?

Not much. I never read an autopsy report before,

and I'd just as soon never read one again.

Autopsy report's the cornerstone of any homicide investigation.

This one tells us that the perpetrator probably had special combat training.

- Where did you see that? - Right here. "The murder weapon penetrated the body...

"between the third and fourth ribs, at an upward angle...

"entering the right lung at a depth of two inches,

severing the pulmonary artery. "

I read that. The victim was stabbed from behind on the right side of the rib cage,

which would make the killer right-handed.

Yeah, yeah. But you're missing something.

Now, you stab somebody in the heart, they can still scream.

But you penetrate the lung, they can't even let out a whisper.

They're trained to do that in Special Forces.

Well, that wasn't in the report. How did you know that?

I'm a professional investigator. It's my business to know these things.

Besides, I called the coroner and he told me.

Hey, fellas.

How much do you think we could get for all of the furniture here in the office?

Or I got a better idea, how about we sell a couple of squad cars,

startin' with yours first, Turner?

- Is there a problem, Howard? - Well, yeah. There sure is.

I mean, the county crime lab wanted to charge me $7,280 for this stuff.

Now, suppose I send all of this in,

who do you suggest I lay off?

Hmm?

Katie. Katie wouldn't mind making the sacrifice, would you, Katie?

- I've sacrificed enough for you, Tur... - Oh, hey!

- We'll thin this out, Howard. I'll go through it. - Please.

Don't worry. I'll thin it out. Howard. It's fine.

Oh, no, no, no! You're eatin' the car!

Don't eat the car! Not the car!

Oh, what am I yellin' at you for? You're a dog.

Don't understand a word I'm sayin'.

What does it matter anyway? This car is gonna be David Sutton's in a couple of days.

Here. You hungry? Here. Here's an ashtray. Eat that.

You know, it's a terrible thing about Amos.

I'm lockin' my door tonight, for the first time in years.

Oh, now, don't-don't do that. We'll-We'll catch the guy.

L- I-Is this dog food? It says turkey and bacon.

Oh yeah. You know, people love their dogs, so they want a variety.

- What kinda dog are we talkin' about? - Oh, very, very, very big.

Very large, very tall. Very, very wide. Massive. Ugly.

Ah-ha. Well. You don't need this.

What you need is...

this!

I don't even like the dog, Kevin. Why would I get him a toy?

Because dogs like to chew, Scott. I mean, it's either chew this,

or your furniture or your shoes.

- It's up to you. - Okay.

Sunday, Sunday, Sunday! At the Imperial Raceway in San Rapello.

The world-class semifinals of the N.R.D.A. Funny car competition!

Sunday, Sunday, Sunday!

I'd like to thank you, Kevin, for taking all this time away...

Oh, no, no problem. It's my pleasure.

- Dog shampoo. - Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait. That's regular, no.

What you need is... Yeah, medicated. There, that's what you need.

Let's see. Flea, tick, uh, wormer...

Scott! Oh, Scott! In case of bad breath, regular, or minty?

Thank you, Kevin.

- Ninety-seven fifty-one. - Ninety-seven fifty-one?

What? Is that... Is that pesos?

This is for a dog. This is dog food. Ninety-seven fifty-one?

I'm not gonna eat this stuff!

Uh, did I buy smoked salmon? Ninety-seven fifty-one!

How much if I take this back?

I'd like to talk to Kevin. Can you call him, please? Kevin!

You get off of there. Off!

All right, that's it. I'm gettin' my gun.

My rod, my piece, my iron, my heater,

my gat, my lead-hurler!

Do not come back!

Oh, wow. Wow.

That dog's got a lot of guts.

Either that, or he's stupid. No!

You are out! Out.

Out for good. Forget it, I wish it was snowing.

No, no. I wish it was hailing.

I wish it was hailing, God.

Send me hail the size of cantaloupes,

If you're a just and fair God.

No!

Cut it...

No, the... I'm runnin' out of doors.

Oh, no. No. She cannot spend the night.

Get back. Get back.

You, you go ahead. Not you. No, no, no. Come on.

Not you, just her. Get back in the car.

Wait a minute, what am I doin'? What am I doin'?

Go ahead, Hooch. Go ahead. Go. Go!

Go. Go. Go ahead. Go, boy, go.

Follow her. Follow her, boy. She wants ya, man!

This is why she's doin' this, so you'll follow her. In. In. In.

Go in, go in, go in.

Hi.

- Scott Turner, right? - Yeah, I was lookin' for my dog. Have you seen him?

Yeah, I noticed. You know anything about fuses?

- Electrical fuses? - Uh, yeah. Can you come in?

For two minutes? Just two minutes.

- A fuse box? Sure. - Come in.

- Bedroom light is on! - Huh? What?

- What? - Bedroom light is on!

So tell me when the bathroom light goes on.

Mm, all right!

Hey!

- Hey! - Uh, no, not yet.

Uh, look, thank you, but, uh...

The-The... Your lights are on. This is going to take you all night, you know.

No, actually, I just quit.

- You were gonna leave it like this? - Yes.

- Oh. - I'm gonna start again tomorrow, but...

Well, you, ah, don't have to help, but there's...

a couple of rollers there, and an extra brush.

- This really bothers you. - This would make me nuts, yeah.

It's harder to cut it in a big town than it is in a small town.

Aw, that's a crock.

- Oh? - In a big town, you're anonymous.

You make your mistakes, no one sees it.

Who cares? In a small town, you got to look everybody right in the eye.

Oh. Well, there's a... There's a lot more to it than that.

Well, that's true. You'll probably have better luck with women.

Women in big cities outnumber the men, so they're more desperate.

Thank you very much.

If you have opinions about anything,

I want to encourage you to express them.

Don't be shy. Just blurt them right out.

Well, you're better off here.

- Oh, yeah? - It's a wonderful town to raise kids in.

- Well, I don't have kids. - Well, I want five kids.

How about a dad? Huh? Have you got a dad picked out for these five kids?

- No. Not yet. - No?

- Well, let me fill you in on the Cypress Beach singles scene. - God, I hate that phrase...

- "The Singles Scene. " - There's Embers Cocktail Lounge.

Or, what else? I guess the, uh, well, the Dairy Queen.

But I usually arrest guys my age who are hanging out at the Dairy Queen.

'Course, you're pretty opinionated, and you want to have those five kids, so...

- That I am. - And we are...

- Uh, yeah. - Finished.

- This is good. - Yeah.

- Doesn't it feel good? - This feels very good.

- Huh? - I got to admit it.

- Here you go. - Oh, thank you.

Thank you.

You have paint all over you.

It's even up in your hair.

Look at you. You don't even have it on your hands.

- Spotless.