Original subtitles

Wall Street, the street of chance.

On one end, the river.

At the other, a graveyard.

Daring speculators risking their all, losing or making millions overnight.

I don't know anything about losing money, but there's a much safer way of making it.

Suppose you tell me, lady.

Gladly.

Marry it.

Four, six, nine, 13, and double word score

makes it 26. That's 97 to 11. Who's ahead?

Some girls have all the luck.

Listen to this.

Cinderella girl, Webb's millionaire, she met at dog show. Ooh,

you walk in with a dog license, walk out with a marriage license.

She's not bad looking.

Let me see.

Not bad looking. She looks like a cocker spaniel. Loco.

That is a Cocker Spaniel.

Oh, and I thought she had cauliflower ears.

Yeah, she's got a lot of long green lettuce to go with them now. That must be Mr.

Toby for the rent. Come in.

Now, see here, girls, I... Well, this is a surprise.

Dear.

Mr. Biddle is going to be quite disappointed.

Mr. Biddle?

Who's he?

The man who came into town last night.

I, uh... Well, I sort of, uh...

Halfway promised him he'd be able to have a subtle

lease on this place for a month or so.

Well, you can tear up the other half of that promise.

We like it, and we're staying. That's right.

We've got a leash, you know, and that should at least give us squatter's rights.

And you can't unsquat us.

Actually, girls, this would work out to your benefit. Now, Mr.

Biddle's a very wealthy man,

and he'd be willing to pay you a substantial bonus for the use of the apartment.

Sorry, we're staying.

Well, all right.

Oh, I'll just leave his card. In case you change your mind,

you can just give him a call. Bachelor, you know. Bachelor.

Who cares?

The city is teeming with wealthy bachelors. Yes, but how do you get on their team?

Wouldn't it be nice if we could just throw a net

out over the town and troll for millionaires?

Wait a minute.

We don't have to troll.

We might just have a fish right here in our net.

Mr. Biddle. Of course. We'll call and tell him we want to sublease the apartment.

But I thought you said... Actually, we never move out.

Oh, no.

Once this place becomes co-ed, I'm joining a different sorority.

We just pretend we want to sublease the apartment.

That gives us a chance to meet him. Oh, Mike, you're a genius.

Now, we know he's rich, and we know he's a bachelor.

But we don't know anything else about him.

What else is there to know? Well,

it would help if we knew what sort of girls he prefers.

You know, he might just go for those high society types.

Yeah, he might even go for the intellectual horn-rimmed glasses type.

Well, I wear glasses.

I withdraw my statement.

Most men go for either the sophisticated Tallulah

type or the slinky Marilyn Monroe type.

Well, we'll give Mr. Biddley's choice.

I'll be Marilyn.

And I'll be Tallulah.

Well, what am I supposed to be, Bugs Bunny?

Oh, honey, we just can't take a chance this time.

Look, why don't you stay on the sidelines and let us carry the ball?

Can't I just dribble a little? A lot of men go

for the outdoor type. Why can't I be that?

And I promise you, I'll be very careful. I won't say a word. I'll be the strong,

silent type, like Gary Cooper.

Well, what do you say, Marilyn?

Well...

Very well. Chalula. Okay, Gary, you're in.

I'll go call Mr. Biddle now.

Oh, gosh. I hope he doesn't go for Cocker Spaniels.

Good evening. I'm Mr. Biddle.

Oh, how nice. I might recall.

Do come in. I hope you'll excuse the condition of the place. Do sit down, won't you?

We gave our maid the day off.

Must you know.

Powerful union.

Cozy apartment. Shame you have to give it up.

You taking a trip or something?

Have to, you know.

Life is so boring without Paris, London, and Rome.

You do understand, don't you?

Not really. I do all of my traveling right here in the good old USA.

Come to think of it, you're so right.

Anything to avoid those frightful passport pictures. Really,

I think I'll cancel my trip.

Well, in that case, I hope you'll excuse me.

I've, uh...

I've got to meet some friends.

Oh, but I do want to sub blood, my dear, and you haven't seen the rest of the plays.

Well, I guess I could stay a while.

This is one of my roommates, Greta Hansen. Darling, this is Mr. Biddle.

Charles will do.

Charles, I adore masculine names.

Well, Greta can tell you more about the apartment.

Oh, the apartment.

Do you cha-cha-cha?

I suppose you could call it that.

Come now.

You must be fabulous.

I just bought this record. You'll love it.

Come on, don't be bashful.

Oh!

I warned you.

I'm sorry.

Oh!

Here, you'd better sit down.

Oh, I think I sprained my ankle.

Would you help me to the couch?

I have a better idea.

Why, Mr. Biddle, I hardly know you.

Give us a chance to get acquainted.

Well, I really shouldn't.

Too bad.

Oh, but I will.

Tennis, anyone?

This is my roommate, Loco Jones. Mr. Biddle is in pictures.

Mr. Biddle and I are going out to dinner.

Mike, not to bother with the hors d'oeuvres.

Oh, oh, sure. Sure.

Oh, sorry. I could forget about the hors d'oeuvres. Marilyn Monroe wins.

Mr. Biddle is taking Greta out to dinner. Loco, where am I?

Look who tells me you're running out on us. We'll miss you terribly.

Well, good night, and thanks for everything.

Have a scrumptious time, Lambie.

Oh, my key. I mustn't forget my key.

Oh, I believe it's in your other bag over there, dear.

I'll just be a minute. Charles?

Well, the apartment gag worked. How'd I do, Mike? Did I play my part well?

I told you I wouldn't foul him.

So, it was all a gag.

I guess I'm pretty stupid. You had me fooled.

I'm sorry, I didn't really mean it.

You girls put on quite an act.

It's a shame to waste it.

Good night.

Well, take a bow.

I... Yes, we know.

You're sorry.

Anybody for arsenic, make mine iodine. On the rocks.

Have a little coffee. You've got to eat something today.

You think Charles will call me?

Oh, forget him. He isn't the only millionaire in the country.

We're only up to the bees in the blue book.

It isn't just his money, Mike. He was a real sweet guy, and I kind of liked him.

Oh, that loco. Why couldn't she have another ear instead of that mouth?

Go easy on the kid. You've hardly said a word to her all morning.

That girl has cost us more millions than the 1929 stock crash.

She's been in her room for over an hour. I'd better go take a look.

Greta, why don't you come with me? Make up with her. She's feeling so low.

Okay.

Look, what are you doing?

Oh, I'm moving out. What?

Look, honey, what happened yesterday is all forgotten.

We're still friends.

Oh, it isn't just yesterday, Greta.

Just that...

Well, we're a little too crowded in here, and we keep getting in each other's hair.

Well, so what? One shampoo and we're all pals again.

Now, come on and put these things back.

Oh, no, no.

You see, I've been offered a swell job out of town.

Out of town?

Where?

Hollywood.

Hollywood.

When did all this happen?

Why didn't you tell us before?

Well, I was afraid Greta might be angry. You see, I ran across Mr.

Biddle on Madison Avenue,

and he said he might be able to use me in his next picture. That's nice.

Is he going to Hollywood, too?

Oh, no, no, he's staying right here in town.

Oh, this picture, Loco.

What kind of a party are you getting?

Oh, it's just a small part.

Not very much. I get killed right near the beginning.

You know, one of those murder mysteries. Takes place in China.

Small part, huh?

Exactly what?

Oh, I play a dancing girl. Yeah, a Malayan dancing girl.

Malayan?

That's in China.

Well...

You see, I stole away on a ship.

What's the name of this picture?

Shanghai Blues.

Shanghai Blues? Well, it's a musical detective story.

No cowboys?

Gee, I don't know.

I didn't read the script.

Well, it all sounds kind of daffy to me.

But if you're on the level,

I think you're making a great mistake going to Hollywood.

I mean, so many girls go there and come back disappointed.

Mike's right.

I had a friend, Susie Cripps, went to Hollywood.

She got a part, sure, but... Well, I went to see the movie, and believe me,

I saw more of the usher than I saw of Susie.

Now, Greta, I have to give myself a chance.

Who knows?

I might become a big star.

Well, if your mind's made up.

So, goodbye. What do you mean, goodbye? We're

taking you to the airport. Oh, no, no, Mike.

It'll only make things tougher.

I want to say goodbye right here. See?

It's been so long. You've been swell.

Greta?

You've both been just great.

Bye. No.

What's the matter?

She packed my clothes.

I'm thinking about Loco, huh?

It's been only four days since she left, and it seems like four years.

This place sure is quiet without her.

Remember the time you and I got home early and switched the furniture around?

Yeah.

We moved the TV set over near the windows.

Poor Loke. She watched the fishbowl for half an hour

and said it was the best show she'd ever seen.

I'll never forget that look on her face when she left.

Yeah, I've been thinking about that, too. Okay.

Hello?

Yes, she's here.

It's Charles.

Charles? Oh, just a minute. Oh.

Yes, Charles?

Greta, I'm sorry I walked out on you the other day. It was kind of silly.

Oh, that's all right, Charles. I guess I deserved it.

Look, how about you, Mike, and Loco joining me for dinner tonight?

Oh, we'd love to. Loco, didn't you send her to Hollywood?

Who's been drinking?

Well, you are in pictures, aren't you?

Well, sure. But my pictures are in frames.

I'm an art dealer.

An art dealer? Well, then you have no idea where Loco is?

Sorry, Charles, I can't see you tonight. Call me later.

That Hollywood routine Loco gave us was just a line. She never saw Charles. Oh,

I should have known. What dopes we were.

She left because she thought she was in the way.

Silly goon.

I'm calling your modeling agency.

They ought to know where to reach you.

Hello, Mrs. Talbot?

This is Mike McCall. Can you tell me where Loco is?

You can't?

Three days?

And you have no idea where she is now?

Thank you.

Wait.

If you hear from her, will you call me?

Please.

Bye. Bye.

What did she say?

Oh, they sent Loco out on a few jobs last Monday,

but she muffed them all, so they fired her.

Fired her? But Loco's one of their best models.

Oh, the poor kid, she must be frantic.

Well, we've tried every place but the city zoo.

Why not the zoo?

Local can spend hours watching the monkeys.

Yeah, and the monkeys can spend hours watching her. Get dressed for your show. Yeah.

Why not?

Why not what?

My TV show. Loco never misses it. I could talk to her while we're on the air.

Yeah, and the next second they give you the air.

What's a job? The important thing is to find Loco. Hello?

Oh, yes, Charles.

I'm sorry, I don't have time to talk to you right now. Would you call me later?

Bye. Turning down millionaires, it's un-American.

I've got to hurry. Will you help me get dressed?

Right.

Hey, Toots, what happened to my sandwich?

Oh, yes, sir. Coming up, sir.

What time is it?

Almost 9 o'clock.

Would you mind turning on the wrestling box?

Wouldn't you rather see the quiz show? A friend of mine is on it.

Wrestling?

Yes, sir. In a minute, sir.

Here you are, kid. Ham on rye.

And I hope you got it right this time.

Oh, I'm sure I have, Nick.

Here you are, sir. One ham sandwich.

I ordered Swiss cheese. What's with you, anyway?

Sorry.

Now what?

He wanted a cheese.

What kind of cheese?

I forgot.

That's the fifth order you've goofed tonight, kid. What's the matter?

You got something on your mind?

Oh, no, I'm fine. I guess maybe it's these new glasses.

They're giving me a headache.

Oh, no!

Look, kid, maybe you ought to go home.

I don't need my glasses. Honest, please give me another chance.

And it was a Swiss cheese. I remember,

because I once had a picture of a sandwich with a little feather on top, yodeling.

Okay, take their order. And this time, write it down.

Yes, sir.

Oh, what darling children. Are they twins?

This one is the city image of you. All right, honey, all right,

I'll buy another one for you.

Come on, let's get out of here.

It's nine o'clock. Your wrestling belts are on the air.

Could I please watch my friend's show?

Please?

Couldn't I just watch it for one minute?

Oh, all right.

And now, our first contestant, Max Bigelow,

who returns this week to try for $28,000. Hello, Mr. Bigelow.

Are you nervous?

Me? No.

Well, we all wish you luck.

All right, Miss Hanson, please show Mr. Bigelow into the isolation booth.

Look what they put on that guy's back.

Loco, come home.

Who the devil's Loco?

I'm Loco.

I'll say it.

For $28,000, can you answer this question?

Where is Loco?

Loco, please come home. We miss you.

I can't. Please don't ask me. Are you all right?

Forgive us, Loco. Mike and I want you to come back.

All right, Miss Hanson. You may go now.

Oh, poor Greta. She'll get fired.

I hope so.

Fired?

They're killing her. They don't need me. Where are you going? Home.

Have another sandwich.

Look, have some more coffee. You haven't eaten a thing.

Please, Mike.

My agency is sending me out on an assignment today, and if you keep stuffing me,

I'll only be able to model sofas. Boy, did we miss you.

You know, Mr. Biddle called Greta twice yesterday,

and she hung up on him both times because she was so concerned about you.

She did?

Congratulate me, kids.

I got my job back. Oh, how wonderful! What happened?

Well, the station got so many calls from people asking about Loco,

the producer wants me to bring her in for next week's show. I'm so happy! Gosh!

Hello?

Oh.

No, I'm sorry, she's not in.

And please, don't bother her anymore. Who was that, Loco? Mr. Biddle.

She said you hung up on him twice.

Have a cookie, Mike.