Original subtitles

That old devil's sea, its mysteries, its sunken treasures. From time immemorial,

men have risked their lives probing its watery depths

in search of the glittering riches entombed there.

But that salt water is just murder on your hair.

There's a much neater way to glittering riches.

Well, you tell me, lady.

You can marry it.

Let's go.

Well, what's all the rush? I'm not due at the studio

for hours. Yeah, it's early for me, too.

Girls, we are overdue with the rent,

and if I know that beady-eyed first assistant manager,

he'll be scurrying up here to collect it.

So in this case, the early bird avoids the worm.

So please, let's get moving.

And please, quietly, or Skinflint Toby might catch us.

This is one time we won't find the old grouch standing out

in the hall like a wooden Indian waiting to catch us. Quiet!

How?

Girls, look who's here.

How are you, Mr. Toby?

A little grouchier than usual.

I'll bet you can't imagine what I've come for.

A cup of coffee? No.

He came to fix that broken vent on our heater.

Gee, I thought he came for the rent. Right.

Give that little lady an eviction note.

Oh, heavens, girls, look at the time. We'd better hurry. We'll be late for work.

You know, tote that barge, lift that bale.

Pay a little rent or you'll land in jail.

So I'd better have it in my hand by the end of this week or you're in trouble.

Gee, Mike, this happens every month.

I still say we're sacrificing too much to keep

this penthouse. Well, don't give up hope.

One of these days, one of us is bound to run into Mr. Millions.

Come on, let's go.

Come on, Mr. Conway, go on home. I'll have to close this place up.

The girls in the show have gone. The boys in the band are tired.

There's nobody left but you and me.

All right, I'll dance with you.

Well, right into the arms of an angel.

Angel?

The toe you're standing on hurts like the devil.

Oh, let Daddy kiss it and make it well.

I don't even know you.

You can say that after you held me in your arms.

You know something? You're a little goofy.

Why'd they kick you out of there?

Oh, it's habit.

Pure habit.

I've been thrown out of so many places, it's become the great American tradition.

People don't say goodbye to Charlie Conway anymore. They say, keep him flying.

Charlie Conway! Oh, now I remember you from the newspapers.

The time you came to somebody's garden party by parachute.

Yes.

Made quite a splash, too.

Landed in the punch bowl.

Anyway, that's all past history. Before I fell in love with you.

Fell in love with me? Mm-hmm. Say, you are a little daffy.

I know, but let's discuss it over breakfast. How do you like your eggs?

Sunny side up. Wait a minute. I've had my breakfast. I've got to get to work.

Work?

That could cause me to lose my appetite.

Now, promise me you'll never mention that nasty, nasty word again.

Garcon!

Table for two!

They just threw you out of there. Oh, that's all right.

I don't hold a grudge.

I'll straighten things out.

You know, they can throw me out all day if it ends up like this.

You're very sweet, but I don't know if my toe can take it. Ooh, it's cold in here.

I'm going to turn on the heat.

Hey, that thing sounds worse than ever. Hasn't Toby fixed it yet?

No, but he left a note.

Clatter, clatter, little vent.

How I wonder where's the wrench.

Hey, girls!

Mike! Greta!

Mike!

Where are you, girls?

Oh, girls, our worries are over.

Today I met the man. You did? You did. What's he like?

Just like the man of my dreams.

You mean he's a postman? No, no, not Charlie.

He hates any kind of work.

He told me he's completely irresponsible. Footloose and fancy-free. And so far,

you've given a perfect description of a hobo. Oh, no, Mike.

Charlie might be a little eccentric, but he's nice.

And loaded.

His father owns the Conway Construction Company. Why, loco, you've struck pay dirt.

Why, Charlie Conway is the heir to the family fortune, and believe me,

that's a tidy little sum. They've got so much money,

they pile it up with power shovels.

Gee, that doesn't sound very tidy.

I'll bet that's him.

He's been following me all day.

Hi, loco.

Just thought I'd scoot around and meet your friends.

How you can say he's eccentric?

I'd like you to meet Mike and Greta.

Lovely, lovely, lovely.

Say, and that goes for your place, too.

It'll be just perfect for our party.

What party?

Why, the big one we're going to throw to celebrate our meeting.

I'd have it at our house, but Father would probably object.

Object?

Yes, the rest of the family suffers from weak nerves.

It's not hereditary. It's just environmental.

I gave it to them.

Well, let's see now. There's going to be lots of people to invite,

so make sure that you get plenty of champagne.

Oh, fine. No, no, no, no.

Let's not discuss money. Just do it up round and give the bill to Charlie Boy.

Before you can blink those pretty eyes of yours,

Charlie Boy will give the bill to dear old Dad.

This way, boys.

Well, soon you'll be walking down the aisle with the Conway Millions.

Gee, Mrs. Conway Construction Company. Oh, I'll bet that's Charlie.

I hope he likes the decorations. Oh, they're expensive. He'll like them.

Well, how do you like it? Oh, it's great. Terrific. Sensational.

But the wrong motif.

It needs just the right touch of disaster.

Disaster? That's it.

A disaster party.

Sounds great. I'll dedicate the whole thing to my father.

Naturally. Yes, naturally.

To your father?

Naturally.

Why?

Because he just disinherited me.

Cut me off without a pat. Anything wrong?

Please, Charlie, tell us it isn't true. He was only joking.

No, Father, I wasn't joking.

All these last few years, he's been steadily losing his sense of humor.

Oh, well.

Enough time wasted.

You girls get on with those decorations.

Check with you later.

You know who's right. This party is a disaster.

Goodbye, Mrs. Conway Construction Company. Well, what are we going to do?

We can't just let a millionaire slip through our fingers,

especially after this investment.

You're right, Greta. We've got to return dear,

lovable Charlie to the bosom of his family. Yeah, we better.

Or else we'll have to pay next month's rent with cold slaw and salami.

No job's here for him.

We've got to find something. I told you I talked to his father.

I promised Charlie he'd get a job. Are you sure his father said he'd re-inherit him?

After they revived him. Tiger, please, quickly.

Charlie may bold if he sees us going to the want ads.

Hello!

Girls, it's Mr. Toby, the first assistant manager. Oh,

isn't it nice when the first assistant building manager

takes the trouble to pay a social call on his tenants?

Social call, my foot. Where's the rent?

Do you like cold cuts?

Well, I think we're entitled to a little service first. I mean,

with everything breaking down around here.

Another dodge. What's breaking down around here?

Well, that heater vents. All we ever get from that is noise.

And what about that leaky faucet? Bleep bloop all night long.

I can't get a wink of sleep. Yes, and that creaky elevator.

We take our lives in our hands every time we step into it.

The least you could do is supply parachutes.

Those repairs always come up.

I can't do everything myself since I lost my maintenance man.

But that has nothing to do with what... Well,

your needing a new maintenance man is certainly... Wait a minute.

Did you say you need a new maintenance man?

Yes, but I... You need one right away?

Of course I do, but... It so happens we have just the person for you.

He's an experienced fellow?

Oh, brother, is he experienced.

Where did he do maintenance before?

Oh, uh, nightclubs.

He's maintained a lot of those.

Oh, you'll like Charlie.

Well, I do need a man badly, so send him around

in the morning, and I'll give him a try.

And if you don't pay your rent by tomorrow evening,

I can always use him to help throw you out of here.

Well, that'll be a switch for Charlie.

He'll be there in the morning.

Bye, Mr. Toby. Bye.

But will he be there in the morning?

Yeah, can he do it?

I mean, does he know how to fix things? What does he have to know?

We complain around here. Does anything ever get fixed?

Besides, any job will do.

Just so his father sees he's willing to make an effort to hold one down. Well,

I just hope he goes for it. Oh, he will. We won't have any trouble with him at all.

Once we apply the chloroform.

Yoo-hoo!

Guess who?

Good night, men. Charlie!

Am I glad you showed up. Where have you been?

Oh, my usual haunts.

But we were looking for you there, and we couldn't find you in any of them.

I'll bet you didn't look in the alleys, did you?

Since my father disinherited me, they've been throwing me out the back doors.

I really came over to apologize, loco.

I'm awfully sorry I got you girls into that scrape, that party mess and all.

Well, if you're really sorry, I know how you can make it up to us.

Well, name it, and I promise I'll do it.

Do you really promise?

Cross my heart.

Then take the job we've lined up for you. I'll get the overalls.

Well, girls, it's past my bedtime.

You promised! Oh, look, this job will get you

back into the good graces of your father.

And a bus, too. It'll make a new man of you.

Well, isn't there some easier way?

Like reincarnation or something.

Charlie, why are you so opposed to work?

Well, to tell you the truth, it's against my principles.

Your principles?

Yes, I am a devout bum.

You're over off.

Now listen, you go and put these on.

All right, you win.

Just let me get some breakfast before I go to meet my fate.

There's toast and coffee in the kitchen. We haven't got much time, though.

We have to get to work, too.

That's all right. I'll help myself, girls. Just don't go to any trouble for me.

Trouble? There's never any trouble.

Just the same, we'll be keeping an eye on you.

Now, Loco, sometime today you call up Mr. Conway Sr.

Gee, will he be surprised to hear Charlie's working? You know,

I can hardly believe it myself.

As a matter of fact, Loco, check up and see what he's doing in there.

He's very quiet. He's just dawdling over his coffee. Well,

we better go in and hurry him up.

Charlie, we better go. Boy, he is ingenious. Quick, I'll

try the elevator. You take the stairs.

Hold it, hold it, hold it.

There is no way he could have possibly gotten out of this room.

He's got to be here somewhere.

Yes.

I was having trouble finding the butter.

A little chilly in there.

Oh, Charlie.

I'm finished trying to make an honest citizen out of him. You're right, Greta.

He'll never change. If you'll pardon us, we have jobs to do.

Maybe it won't kill me.

You girls can do what I can give it a whirl to.

Oh, honey, you're so wonderful. Oh, yes, isn't that wonderful?

They look very well on you. Oh, I'm sure they do.

You're adorable.

Oh, 21 flights of stairs. Boy, that was rough. Especially after a hard day's work.

I wonder how Charlie did at his job.

Oh, I'll think about that later.

Right now, I'd like to know what happened to that elevator.

Charlie fixed it. It's stuck between the eighth and ninth floor,

and I doubt if we'll ever see it again.

Oh, Mr. Toby, you gave us quite a start.

Well, turnabout's fair play. You gave me quite a start, too, you know.

I start on my way to a nervous breakdown!

Why?

Is something wrong around here?

Oh, what could be wrong with such a pearl of a maintenance man on the job?

Isn't that nice? Charlie impressed him.

Oh, he impressed me all right.

He's impressed everybody in the building. He's so skillful at everything he does.

Like the way he repaired the water pipes.

Incidentally, you'll want to take a dip in our new pool.

New pool?

Yes, it's on the 12th floor.

But it's working its way down.

Then there's the hot water boiler that he busted,

and the heating system no longer works.

Didn't he fix anything right?

Oh, yes, yes. Yes, he's got the air conditioner working perfect.

Except we can't turn it off, and I can't jump with him.

Don't you know where he is now?

No, he's kept one step ahead of me all the time.

Hello?

Oh.

Yes, I'll tell him.

Mr. Toby, that couple on the third floor is going

to sue if you don't turn off the air conditioning.

They say icicles are forming on their electric blanket.

Got to find Charlie and straighten out this mess before Toby fires him.

We can't let him lose his job now, just when Mr.

Conway's coming around to see his son at work.

If you were Charlie, where would you be right now? Besides in trouble, I mean.

Hiding in the refrigerator. Oh,

he's probably trying to get that air conditioning turned off.

Fuse box in the basement. Come on, girl.

Charlie!

What are you doing down here?

Trying to shut off a group of American air conditioners.

Well, you better hurry before Charlie finds you and fires you.

Yes, depressing character, isn't he?

It's a bit windy down here. Now,

the only problem is to find the right wire and break the connection. Well,

doesn't it have a switch on it? Well, it did, but

the switch wasn't working right, so I fixed it.

Boy, I fixed it good.

Oh, here's the big one!

Oh, wait a minute. I wouldn't fool around with that if I were you.

I mean, what do you know about electricity? Well, in college,

they called me Live Wire Conway! Come back!

Well, the air conditioner's still on,

but I think we've seen the end of pay TV in this building. Now, listen, Charlie.

Heaven only knows what you've done here.

Well, there must be a...

Oh, no, no, I wouldn't do... Hello?

Yes, I know it's cold.

What's going on here anyway, for heaven's sake?

Yes, I know they're blinking on and off.

Like that?

What's going on here? Charlie, what'd you do?

Look at that elevator. I may have put it in orbit.

I'm going to stop all this. Look, stand back, stand

back. Now back, you silly, mixed-up monster, back!

That was fucking vital that time. Give me one more for good measure.

I just climbed in to get it started when suddenly I'm weightless.

Look at his hair.

It must have turned white from fright.

That's plaster!

So, there you are. Who have I been waiting for this

moment? You are fired! I carry on your truth!

Charlie!

Oh, hi, Dad.

Those overalls, that dirt on your hands, then it is true.

You're actually working.

Well, sure he is. You should do your work.

I'm just helping Mr. Toby with some of his maintenance problems.

Help him!

I never thought I'd see this day.

Your mother and I have prayed for it.

Gee, Dad, I didn't know it meant that much to you. Why didn't you ever tell me?

But I'm not going to be angry at you anymore, boy.

When I heard about you working here, I said to myself, if it's true,

I'll buy that building for him.

So, it's yours.

See, Dad, you didn't get much of a buy in this building.

But if it's really mine, there's just one improvement I'd like to make.

Go ahead and make it.

You're fired!

We've got the rent paid, a millionaire on the hook,

and the future might definitely be described as Rosie.

Yeah. Isn't Charlie a dreamboat? Now,

if we could only find some way of keeping him under control. Well,

we'll cross that Grand Canyon when we come to it.

Oh, honey.

Oh, we were just talking about you.

Look, I got paid for that day's work.

The very first money I ever earned in all my life.

Doesn't that make you feel good? Well, we'll frame it.

You know, this little piece of paper has opened my eyes to a lot of things.

This, my father's pride in me.

And the faith you girls had in me.

Look, I'm a changed man.

I'm through with all that high living.

Charlie, that's super.

I really mean it this time. You see, I've been figuring out some things.

And you know what's been my trouble all along?

Too much money. Too easy.

You know, I think you're right.

Anyway, I'm glad you... That's why I'm giving up every

penny of my family's wealth and setting off on my own.

But... But isn't there some other way?

Made up my mind.

I'm going to leave this town.

Start all over someplace.

There's no time to begin like the present.

Loco, you've been wonderful to me.

Just what I needed to make me change.

Well, I'm off now.

When will I see you again?

Who knows?

Maybe I'll come back someday.

After I've made my own millions, of course.

Gee, I don't think you'll make very much as a maintenance man.