Original subtitles

Verdi will always be Verdi!

But this is Rossini!

Listen to this noise!

And l got a fine yesterday just for blowing the horn!

Really? They play as they can whistle!

- Wait for me here. - Alright.

At your orders, sergeant. Satisfied with me, sergeant?

You still are the best tympanum player in the army.

Thank you, but only when conducted by you do l feel a good tympanum player.

Could be.

lt is not liked. We need a more modern music.

Unfortunately the sergeant doesn't like my music, and neither do you.

Dad!

- Hi, dad. - Have you listened? - Yes, with Sandro.

- Are you taking a walk with him? - lf it's okay with you...

- Beh... we'll meet at home. - Alright. Good afternoon.

- Who's this Sandro? - The fiancee. - When is she getting married?

- We don't know. - Engaged and they don't get married?

- Getting married is not like having a coffee. - Exactly.

Should my monsignore uncle marry them?

He marries them and l'll play the hymn.

Do you like that? A beautiful hymn.

II beI soIe. II cavaIIo.

La madre deI bambino con iI paIIoncino.

- QueIIe femme n'est pas bonne. - What does ''pas bonne'' mean?

- lt means ''stupid''! - Stupid?

When you see this stupid you say: ''pas bonne''.

French means everything in life! lt opens all the doors for you.

D'you think they speak ltalian in France? They say everything in French!

Ca c'est Paris!

- Always Paris, Alberto! - Yes, always Paris!

l enforced traffic on Champs-Elysees, don't you remember?

- How could l not, you remind it to me ten times a day - That's envy.

When they were picking guys for going in France, they picked me, not you.

Ca, c'est Ia verite.

You've got no sensitivity, while l have the ear for languages.

4 or 5 lessons are enough, and l won't be enforcing traffic anymore.

l'll get the sash on my arm.

Do you know what the sash on the arm means?

- Yes, someone you know is dead. - Don't play smart-ass.

lt means work will be only a joke for me,

that l'll always be among french women.

- The French woman is twice a woman. - Why?

lf you have a date with a French woman, you'd better bring a friend along.

Un autre chevaI.

lf we go at the horse butcher's, we'll find a lot!

Oui, des chevaIs morts.

Pietro, when you made the mistake, the sergeant threw you an evil look.

- l don't look at the sergeant when l play - That's why you go wrong.

- Sometimes the score isn't enough. - l don't look at the score.

- But what are you looking at? - l read ''La cronaca di Roma''.

- For what we're playing...! - You're right.

l'll have a cigarette. Yes, ''for what we're playing!''

- l'm tired of always playing the same music. - Me also.

Rossini, Leoncavallo, Verdi! One gets tired!

There're our national values, the young composers.

Living composers, it's them we must help!

You must help the ones alive, not the dead!

Why isn't a Manganiello included in the program?

- Who is Manganiello? - Don't you remember my name?

l am Giuseppe Manganiello!

l wanted to check if l could play.

One day, the bands all over the world will play my hymn.

''The Traffic Policeman's Prayer''.

ln fact, l changed the title. lt isn't ''The Traffic Policeman's Prayer'' anymore

beacause, being the monsignore's nephew,

it looked as if l was asking for a recommendation.

Prayer... monsignore... no more!

l thought... please.

l thought: ''The Lament of the Metropolis''.

Let me play you the first introductory notes.

l'll play them.

Eh?

You'll see!

They'll put my bust in the Pincio, one day!

Take that.

- And what will you have there? - The belly, that's what!

lt's useless, you don't have feel musical pain. You don't suffer for music!

What greater suffering then having you near me with that cursed trombone?

Did you like how father played today?

- And then, he plays a very difficult instrument! - Beh?

- ls your father indispensable to the band? - Yes.

My father is very talented and kind.

- Otherwise l wouldn't be here, alone with you. - No? Who would you be with?

With a traffic policeman.

- Careful, or l throw you in the river! - Are you mad, l could fall!

We'll see if the traffic policeman will come to your rescue.

- Daddy, can l have the whistle? - You can't play with the uniform.

As a matter of fact, Tonino, give me the cap.

l've told you so many times, you must study.

You must be a driver when you grow up, not a traffic policeman.

- The traffic policeman is more important! - Yes, but he goes on foot.

Hi, dad. - Hi.

Come lay the table, l'm dead tired.

- Where have you been? - Driving around with Sandro, with his bike.

- How are you? - Fine, thanks. Hide the cap.

You must finish with this drives.

- Don't you trust Sandro? - l don't trust bikes.

- Why? - Because 60% of all accidents

are provoked by or happen because of moto scooters.

- Sandro's got a motorcycle. - Even worse!

Those are the savage delinquents of the streets!

They lay on the tank and drive around like crazy!

- No, Sandro's careful. - Sandro's the enemy of traffic policemen.

Marisa, it's not that l want to stop you getting married, or engaged,

but you're a sergeant's daughter,

and you get engaged with a young boxer who has a motorcycle!

- Don't worry, it won't happen tomorrow. - ls he selling the bike?

- No, he has reserved a 600 FIA T. - O God!

- Why? - Those are even more delinquent.

The car is small, they can squeeze in wherever they want.

Since the 600 are out... my liver's swollen.

- Dad, dad! You don't like bikers. - True.

l don't like them.

- Even less car drivers. - Have mercy, at all!

- Pedestrians? - Those are miserables.

Then, can l know, whom do you like?

lt's useless kissing me, l don't like bikers.

l like... aviators.

- Look at them with those machines! - Those are automatic swindles.

The sergeant's here.

- Sergeant. -Sergeant Spaziani, it's news seeing you here.

- He dragged me out. - Yes, l told him to come and have fun,

- and play a game. - Fine. - Wanna play?

- Sergeant - But that's only three of us. - Let's play with a dead hand.

- No! - l went out to have fun, not to play with a dead.

- That's how they call it. - Find the fourth man, and l'll be in.

- Find a table. - There it is.

- l'll play with the sergeant. - Why, don't l play well?

- Exactly because you play better, l'll team up with the sergeant. - Alright.

- Wanna play a hand? - At your command.

- Wanna play or not? - l do, but l have to train.

- You don't need it, you're good. - Alright.

- l won't train! - Roberto, you tricked us!

- What's my handicap? - Handicap? Why?

Do you want to beat the sergeant? You'd like it!

When you play, there are no ranks, there're those that lose, and those that win.

l play for the sake of playing, meanning l play to win.

- What's the matter? - He says he can't lose with you.

- No... - How come he can't lose?

- l was saying... - Let it be.

- Than l said... - Can l? - Can l?

- l said there are no ranks when playing. - True!

- That's what l said! - Let's swap places.

- We'll team up. - Permanent team with the sergeant.

- Let's see who deals. - He starts. - l?

- Let's not start with the usual tricks! - What tricks?

- We don't do no tricks! - Not ''us'', you don't do them!

- We don't cheat! - l know it, sergeant.

Alright!

No cut?

- No! See? - He's right.

''We don't cheat''! He doesn't want to lose!

- lt's not true. - Who's the fourth?

- Rinati. - Rinati! - Here l am, sergeant.

- Come here! - Start dealing.

Can l try?

You try.

- ''Hello''! - A coffee? - No, a Courvoisier.

- l don't have ''curvasiett''. - Courvoisier.

lt's 1 80 Iire the small glass, nobody buys it.

ln Paris, with 30 francs, they give you a glass that big.

What french drinks do you have?

- l got ''Fernett''. - ls it french?

- lt ends in double ''t'', it's french. - Then l'll have it.

ls it Fernett, french? Yes, truncate word.

Damn it!

Fernett... that's my change

- You don't tip in Paris? - No, they'd be offended.

Four and three: seven.

- Show me. - Why?

- Because l didn't see. - Your mistake, you should have.

- l was looking at my cards. - You must look here!

- Don't you trust us? - lt's not that, but you move like this...

- Don't you trust the sergeant? - l don't trust you!

- A sergeant's word. - Leave the sergeant alone.

- Word of a sergeant's team mate. - He doesn't count.

Sergeant, if l may. We're not playing on money, it's just between us.

- lt doesn't seem right... - Shall we stake four beers?

Alright? 4 beers and 50 Iire.

Don't you think it's too little?

No offence meant, we could even stake 1 00 Iire.

- Then 1 00 Iire it is, and the drinks. - Alright.

- Let me se what you've got. - Show him your cards.

- He doesn't trust me. - Here it is...

- l wanna see the cards! - Four and three: seven!

Are you happy now?

Four small beers!

Take them, sergeant! Take them!

Yes, l take them.

Here it is, look.

l'm farsighted! Show them to me from far away!

- Show them from far away. - l'm sorry, but he... - lt's nothing.

l don't care if at 1 8:30 there still is daylight.

Rules say lights should be on half an hour before sunset.

The sun sets at 1 9:00 and l, at 1 8:30, give fines.

There only are a few minutes, l only tell them to put on the lights and let them go.

Me, l stop them, and begin writing.

And how they protest! Here, in Rome, they don't want to pay their fines.

ln Northern ltaly they don't protest.

- When the traffic policeman takes of his gloves, there's no escape. - What?

He first listens the complaints, and then, undaunted...

They know that as long as the policeman has his gloves on, you can talk about it,

but when he takes them off, he'll write, there's nothing more to be done.

- Give me a coin for the machine. - Do you take your gloves off often?

O, no, they take them off in Northern ltaly, l never put them on.

Let's see... Bing Crosby, Frank Sinatra...

''C'est si bon''!

''C'est si bon''. 7-A. 7-A.

You can't understand.

- You're too ugly. - Am l?

- Sergeant, he must train! - l'll be right there. - Come on!

- What shal we do? - We'll suspend the game.

- Go train. - We must suspend the game.

Wait! Randolfi!

l'll be right there, sergeant.

- Sergeant, Randolfi! - He plays well?

Move it, Randolfi!

French songs are more relaxing than american ones.

- Can l try? - Yes.

- Hurry up, RandoIfi! - lt was yours. Coming!

l'm playing against you, sergeant? What's the score?

- We're bad off. - 1 2 for us? Who's turn is it?

- The sergeant's - You're next, sergeant.

Seven and two: nine.

- The Queen's on the table, you can't take them. - Sorry, you're right.

That's why they were winning.

- Seven and three, ten. Taken. - Take them, Sergeant!

Wanna see, sergeant?

- Three! - Taken!

Your turn, sergeant.

- A five. - May l, sergeant?

Segeant, you don't know how to play. Should have told me.

- Come, play. - Another one taken.

- Got a four, sergeant? - He's got a four, taken!

- Do you have this one also? - Yes.

- How much did you play on? - 1 00 Iire and the drinks.

- Fantoni! - Four beers. - Alright!

- Give me 1 00 Iire. Segeant, do you want a beer? - Yes.

- 50 Iire. - Didn't we play on 1 .000 Iire? - Are you nuts?

- Are you angry, sergeant? - No! - Still friends?

- To your health. - You owe me 50 Iire.

- l've got a silver medalion, do you want it? - No, 50 Iire.

- l'm not a shoeshine boy, get lost! - Who do you think you are?

- Please, Corso st? - Where do you want to go?

l have to fix an indicator.

- Right or left? - Right.

You're driving without an indicator? Pull over.

- l was going to have it fixed! - He hasn't got an indicator!

Pull over!

Move, move!

AIIez, aIIez! This one!

You!

- You can't stop here, move. - That's what l'm doing, moving away.

- Not you, the car. - Why? - lt's forbidden to stop.

- l should fine you. - Be my guest, l won't pay it anyway.

Alright, whether you pay it or not, that's not my business.

Now l'm writing the fine.

lf you fine me, then l've got the right to leave the car here.

- What'd you have done if l wasn't here? - Yes, but you are here.

So you'll get in the car and drive away, after l've fined you.

- l can't move the car. - Why? - l can't drive.

- Didn't you brought it here? Don't you have the licence? - No.

- You don't have a licence? - No.

Then l'll fine you and confiscate the car.

You can't confiscate the car of someone who doesn't drive, having no licence.

- What do you mean, l can't confiscate? - Do you have a licence?

- What's that got to do? l'm not driving. - Neither am l.

- Young man, please, go away right now. - l'm going.

- Go away now, for your own good! - Yes, for my own good! - Go!

- Let me through! - You can't this way! - That's where l'm going.

- lt's forbidden going that way. - Then where should l go?

Backward, where you came from!

Where you came from!

And they say it's our fault!

That is monsignore's hat!

- l put it on with all due respect. - l know you!

Aunt Carmela, l should have entered the Church.

l'd have already been a bishop by now. Damn it!

- Here's Saint Aniello and the medalions. - Alright.

- l wanna see. - There's a lot of them.

- Aunt Carmela, do you... - Be careful!

Straighten it up, or it'll get ruined.

- ls it in ''plash''? - Of course.

Aunt Carmela, wouldn't you have sixty rosaries?

What do you do with all this stuff? Now and again you come and renew your stock.

l don't eat it!

l give it to my colleagues, to my bosses.

l spread the Gospel in the Corps.

lt's nice seeing these policemen charitable, repentant

- Have you got them? - No. - lt's fine.

- Rosaries, more beautiful medalions? - The medalions are all beautiful.

l'd need a golden one.

- There are no golden medalions. - You don't make? - No!

l wanted it for the sergeant, he always asks me about uncle monsignore...

Are you mad? You pass yourself for the monsignore's nephew?

No, l don't even know him! As a matter of fact, can't you introduce me to him?

- No. And as he's coming for lunch, go away. - He's coming for lunch? - Yes.

- What if l'd also stay for lunch? - Having lunch with the monsignore?

- Stay calm, it's nice seeing the family together. - What family?

- The monsignore doesn't know you! - One can't reason with you!

- Do priests smoke? - Why?

- Cigarettes... - There aren't any cigarettes.

- Liqueur... - What liqueur?

- ln curia they don't... - ln curia they do.

- They don't drink, they don't smoke... - Get lost.

- You're getting mean. - You only come when you need something.

- l love you, you're like my second mother. - Cut it out!

How beautiful! l'd need two dozens of these medalions.

- Have they got brilliantine, and the morning star? - Go away!

lt's better you leave!

No, no.

- Move it, move it. - Right away.

- Where are you going? - l'm moving.

- You must go away with the car. - With the car?

Yes, with the car. What a car!

- With this one? - With what other? - l don't know.

With what car would you like to go away? Are we all stupid today?

- Shall l go away with this one? - Yes, or l'll fine you!

- You said it. - Get moving.

Not this way, that way.

- Does it work? - You've whistled all the time.

- Should l have applauded? - lt works.

- Anything the matter? - No, everything's fine.

- Then? - l'm sorry?

- What do you want? - Are even pedestrians forbidden to stop now?

- Are there too many stopping interdictions? - No, there are too few of them!

Thanks to these signs you can get back on your feet!

l've got a car, but l go by foot in town.

- Then take a hike. - What? - Get moving.

Have you thought at something else for fining people?

We must defend the quietness of citizens seeking rest.

And what about the quietness of the citizen who has to pay?

30% of nervous sicknesses occuring in the city

are due to excessive noise.

- While there're no mental sick people in the country. - Sure!

There're no traffic policemen in the country!

Then why don't you go in the country, there's a lot of hoeing to do!

Stop.

- Are you making me come all the way to the Colosseum? - What is it?

- The Lambretta is no bus. - Why?

- You can't ride in three. Two is tops. - And what are we supposed to do?

l don't know, find a way.

- Who do you think should get down? - You get down.

No, he'd lose the kid on the street!

These are the rules, it's the law!

Am l supposed to leave the kid in the middle of the street?

Then l'll confiscate the Lambretta.

My father has toiled to buy this Lambretta!

- Don't talk, boy. - No, l won't! - Shut up!

- l'm talking to your parents. - No, talk to me!

- Shut up! - Are you shutting it?

- You're right, dad, traffic policemen are all... - Take your hand away!

- What did he say? - Nothing! - They all are s...

- Take your hand away! - Shut up! - What did you say?

- Don't hit him! - Are you hitting me? - What you say?

- Nothing! - l heard a ''S''.

- He didn't say anything! - l heard a ''S''!

- They all are saints! - That's right, they're all saints.

l always say: ''How do these poor traffic policemen manage with the traffic?''

- ''They must be real saints. '' - Do you talk about us at home?

- Yes, even at night. - Even at night.

l really must be a saint to believe these jokes.

- Can l have the whistle? - Cut it off, go away! Move!

- What are you doing? - Dad, if he wanted, he got it!

- Sergeant! - Yes?

- My car? - What are you saying?

- My car was here. - Are you joking again?

- What? - You put it here, but then you took it away.

No, l came back and l put it here.

- After l told you to go away? - Yes.

- lt was a gray 1 ,1 00? - Yes, with a doll in the back.

l understand.

- Was it worth much? - What? - The doll. - No.

- Stay calm, they've stolen it. - What? - The doll.

- And the car? - They took it away along with the doll. - Who?

But it is your fault.

You wanted to play smart, and, in a way, it serves you right. lt was an young man.

- Are you here to help stealing young man's cars? - lt's not true.

- l'm here to send away those that want to stop. - l'll report you!

l'll report the thief and l'll report you also because he was your accomplice!

- Accomplice to theft! Tell me your number. - Here it is.

- 1 81 . - Yes, 1 81 .

- Where's the police station? - There.

- Then go at the lottery-shop. - Why?

- Play the number at lottery! - l'd like to know who made you sergeant?

Come here!

- Didn't you see the white stripes? - Yes, l did, why?

- You should have stayed within. - And didn't l? - No.

- l'm sorry, l was absent-minded. - Do you agree?

What? What are you doing?

- l'm fining you. - For the stripes? No one does it!

- l do. Do you agree? - No, l don't!

- Documents. - Here they are.

For a few centimeters...

- There's a lot of people who get run down for a few centimeters. - l don't care!

- Filocchio or Finocchi? - Filocchi, Dottor Filocchi.

Stay calm. Do you want to take it inside?

l doesn't stop here, l'll write to the papers!

Give them my regards.

- Can l, sergeant? - Come in, ManganieIIo.

Can l?

Have you finished the statistics of street incidents

- from the last month? - No.

- Why not? - Because l've been very busy with ''Street Sentinel''

and ''The Sleeping Metropolis'', which l find a better title.

- What? - The hymn, sergeant!

That hymn again! Here we're at work, we don't talk about hymns!

l've changed that ending, sergeant, that you didn't like, those drum beats...

lt now ends with a violin fugue, and lots of drums and plates.

- lf you'd add it to the repertory... - What repertory!

- The plates... - Forget the plates!

The hymn is bad! l've been wanting to tell you this.

lf it's bad, l'll change it. But you're offending us.

- Why ''us'', didn't you compose it alone? - You're offending me, the author...

- and my monsignore uncle who finds it beautiful. - He doesn't know about music.

That's how you treat my monsignore uncle who so cares about you?

He always inquires about how you've been doing!

As a mattrer of fact... he told me to give you this.

Where did l put it?

No, this are the saints. Wait.

Here are the medalions.

No, this is Saint Ciro.

He gave me Saint Cecily, protectrice of music players.

- Take it. - Thank you. Thank your uncle.

Kiss it, sergeant. lt was kissed by my monsignore uncle.

Kiss it.

- Can l remind my uncle to remember you in his prayers? - Yes.

- Morning and evening? - Yes, thank you!

What shall l tell the monsignore about the hymn? Can he come at rehearsals?

Let's call him at rehearsals.

- Let's caII the monsignore at rehearsaIs. - Alright!

But l've told you this isn't the proper place to be talking about music.

We talk music only at rehearsals!

- Now, l'm busy. - Alright, sergeant.

- lf l may, l'll be going. - That's what l've told you to do!

Kiss your hands.

l think this one's better.

- Really? - Yes.

- And then, he's more handsome. - You're right here, he is handsome.

- lf you'd see girls looking at him... - Really? And he plays along?

Well, when he likes them...

- Then, go with them! - Marisa, you're the only one l like.

You must train! Mari', don't distract him!

Tonino, have you hurt yourself?

The one you just got is called an ''uppercut''.

lf l'd take one like this... l'd be a goner!

You must win, you're not a jelly like me!

You're not a jelly. You're a champ, but you lack weight.

You're well built, you have a good left and you're a good taker.

- Let's see if you are a good taker! - Silence.

- Hit him! Hit him with he left! - Wake up, softy!

Stay calm! We're only practising!

Roberto, this time the sergeant's son-in-law cuts you to pieces!

Me? ln two years l'll be at Madison Square Garden!

- Selling peanuts? - Cut it out!

He won't last even a round!

- Coming to see dad tomorrow? - Sure, now you've even got the plate number!

- Alright, you won't get away now! - Unfortunately.

Madame, l must study numbers up to 1 00, because buses have big numbers.

ParIez en francais.

''Sei'' is a word!

You have to make an effort, or you'll never learn.

Now l'm going to give you some sentences in French, and you'll translate them.

Bien, professeur.

''The feather is black. ''

l don't care if the feather is black, l'm not in the Alpine troops.

- l must study something useful to traffic policemen. - That's my system.

l teach French useful both to policeman, and pedestrian.

- Let's go on. - Of course, l've got an exam tomorrow!

''l'm a gentleman''. You got that, didn't you?

- You're saying? - That l'm a gentleman.

A fruit? Thank you!

- Where're you going? - To take the fruit.

Non, c'est un exercise!

l thought you were offering me an apple this time!

''lt's the door. ''

''Answer the door. ''

''So?''

lt's the bell!

My dear, l told you to open the door!

l've understood, but it's an exercise!

Go open the door!

l must go open the door!

Excuse me, but when it's about the fruit, it's an exercise,

but if it's about answering the door, or buying milk, l have to go!

- Bonjour, monsieur. - Bonjour, mademoiseIIe.

- Bpnjour, madame YoIande. - Bonjour, CharIotte.

- The chair is of moi! - You can't say of ''moi''!

- lt doesn't matter, it's mine! - What is it?

l'm offering the lady a chair. l'll take another one.

- QueI gentiIhomme! - Thank you.

- Have you learned your lesson, Charlotte? - Have you learned your lesson?

- Do you see how smart she is? - Of course l do!

Open your notebooks, and let's have a dictation.

Write.

- How do you spell ''chambre''? - l don't know.

Thank you.

l thought you'd give it to me, but no way!

Why are you laughing?

- lt's mine! - And the chair was mine.

- ''Bono'' the bonbon! - Write.

''ln the first eight month of 1 955 there were 1 4,57 4 accidents,

''resulting in 1 98 dead and 1 1 ,999 wounded. ''

l've prevented lots of accidents,

otherwise who knows where we'd have got!

- What is it? Are you feeling sick? - No, l'm fine.

- l wanted to tell you something. - Go ahead.

Sandro wants to talk to you about me and him.

- Have you argued? - No!

He wants to marry me right after the match.

lf everything goes alright! Because he might get hit and...

And l don't mean to say he should lose.

Anyway... he wants to marry you and you say it like if it was a tragedy?

Your mother had to wait for 1 0 years, but you...

you should be happy.

l'm happy, but l'm thinking at Tonino, and you.

What will you do without me?

l'm always gone,

l could go eat at the mess.

Tonino, l'll put him in a boarding school. Rome is full of them.

- Tonino is 6 old, he is a man now. - Sure, he's man at six years!

- Me at six years... - What were you doing at six years?

- Me at six years... - What were you doing?

l went to school every morning, like he does.

Let's not get melancholic!

lt was worse if you'd have stayed a spinster.

We'd better think about the trousseau.

Don't worry about the trousseau, Sandro doesn't care at all about it.

You always say like this before getting married.

''l don't want anything! l only want you, l don't care... ''

But then, the way of thinking changes.

''You haven't brought one penny worth of dower, not even a handkerchief. ''

No!

- l know about certain things. - lt's different today.

1 2 sheets still are 1 2 sheets!

Even if one tears them to dress one's wounds after a match...

And with this l don't mean... but, you know...

Alright, now put Tonino to sleep.

By the way, they fined Sandro twice today.

Can you make them go away?

Tonino, let's go to bed.

- Kiss daddy. - Good night, daddy. - Good night.

He says he's not interested by the dower,

but already thinks of escaping the fines.

- Osvaldo, tomorrow you're on duty in Piazza Venezia. - Alright.

- Did you take my pillow? - Me?

They've also taken mine!

Again!

Look at the IittIe angeI!

He sleeps very comfortable on our pillows!

Rocky Marciano, you must cut it out with the pillows!

- Who do you think you are? - Let me sleep!

Get used sleeping on rough, when the sergeant's son-in-law will knock you down,

the referee will you give you a pillow and wish you: ''Good night!''

- Drop dead! - We've had it doing your job for you.

Then go to the sergeant.

Yesterday they sent me to the mortuary in your place.

Naturally, with your dead face!

Do you want to go and defend the Corps honor?

What honor? You've lost three matches out of three!

But l went all the way!

Yeah, all the way in taking, not in giving!

Mind your own business!

Want to start it all over again? l'll send you now to the mortuary!

And this are supposed to be the keepers of order?

Dear Verdi, good night.

Have you ever slept in such a humble and poor room like this one?

No, you lived in big hotels, had big wealth, big women.

What have l got, Verdi?

The tuba! Only the tuba!

l won't let it slip away!

No, this is La Traviata.

You wrote this also! Damn! He wrote everything!

This is too well known, it doesn't suit me.

He wrote everything, damn it!

Everything! And what am l to do?

- What's that? - Silence, it's French on records.

''Loving us from when we're born''

''is the mother. ''

''Guiding us from tender years''

''is the mother. ''

lt's true, he who has a mother doesn't cry!

- The mother! - Always the mother! And the father?

The father? ln France the mother does everything!

- And what does the father do? - The promenade.

- Are you sure? - Shut up, go to sleep!

- And how does she do it? - Let me write!

- And your father? - And your grandfather?

lt's on the tip of my tongue!

C'est dure!

Future tense of ''to come''...

Je verrai, tu verras, iI verra.

- l did it. - They all get it wrong!

''Je verrais'' it's the future for ''voir'', ''to see''.

- ''l'll come'' is ''Je viendrais''. - Yes, ''Je viendrais''!

''Je verrai'' doesn't exist. lt's ''Je viendrais'', yes! ''Je viendrais''.

Enough!

Now, translate this phrase:

''My aunt's garden is full of flowers. ''

''Le jardin... ''

''Le jardin de ma mere... ''

l've said: ''my aunt's'', not ''my mother's''.

Je sais, monsieur Ie professeur.

l was confused because it was my mother who had the garden.

- My aunt lived on the third floor. - Don't pIay smart with us.

- Je I'ai dit pour Ia ''record''... - Answer the question, translate.

Le jardin... Le jardin...

- de Ia soeur de ma mere... - l said ''my aunt''.

The mother's sister is the aunt.

''My aunt''! TransIate.

Le jardin...

- de ma ''au''... - Au? - Auu.

- Au? - Auu...

- No! - No.

So?

- lt's difficult. - My aunt translates with ''ma tante''.

''Ma tante''! Yes!

''Ma tante''! l was about to say it, ''ma tante''.

- Le jardin de ma tante est''ful''... - PIein.

Full, pIein... You can say it both ways.

No, ''full'' doesn't exist, you say ''pIein''.

- Madame Yolande, l don't know if you know her... - I don't know her.

She said you could say it both ways.

- Your teacher is an ignorant. - She's french, she has lived in France.

- Have you been in France? - No. - l've been 1 5 days in Paris.

- l enforced traffic on ''Le Champ''- Elysees - You say ''champs''.

- ''Champ''. - Champs.

- Champs. - Yes! - ''Champ'', no.

No.

Youngman, you're not doing well, you haven't studied much.

What are you saying? l haven't been sleeping for a year!

lf you want a proof, here's my room mate, Paolo.

- Paolo, come here! lsn't it true l've studied? - Yes, he has.

- He never let me sleep. - Are you taking the exams?

- No. - Then go away. - Who are you? Go away!

Get lost!

Only the examinees...

- Tell me the days of the week. - ln French, isn't it? - Of course.

Our teacher has made us study a little song...

.. called ''The Days Of The Week''.

''Lundi''I met a girI and on 'mardi''I toId her my Iove.

On 'mercredi'' we got married and happiIy we Ieft.

On 'jeudi''I aIready got tired of her and on ''vendredi''see her I couId not.

On ''samedi''I thought and rethought it.

And on ''dimanche'' I cut her head.

- Nice! - Thank you.

Not only have they failed me, and didn't give me the sash,

but they were on the point of throwing me out of the Traffic Police Corps!

- Why? - Why? lnstead of teaching me french, you taught me songs!

- lt was for making you remember. - A lot of good it brought me!

- ParIez en francais. - When l'm angry, l speak how l wish!

lf l had known French, they'd have promoted me!

You were to teach me something useful for traffic policemen.

- You say traffic policeman and pedestrian are the same thing! - Sure. - No!

A pedestrian can sing songs, a traffic policeman can't.

Especially at exams, and if the teacher is a colonel!

lt's to a colonel that l sang: ''La dimanche l cut her head!''

- But he'll cut my head! - lt was a colonel without esprit.

He may have not had esprit,

but he said to me: ''Your teacher is an ignorant. ''

- Comment? Qu'est qu'iI a dit? - II a dit que vous etes ignorante.

Tell that senile

that he's an ignorant, a boor, and a scoundrel.

- Madame, should l say it in French? - No, tell him aIIa romana!

Good afternoon, l've brought the two sketches for you to approve.

- What are they about? - The Vth Politeness Day.

- What does this mean? - The traffic policeman guides scooter and car drivers.

- lt looks like taking them to the Police. - They'd deserve it.

l've got an idea for Politeness Day.

- We could let drivers enforce traffic. - No!

How are we going to look if the drivers

- are better than us? - l'd voluntarily trade places.

l'd give the uniform for the car!

This is the sketch for the boxing event.

lt's very important for us all, even for our superiors.

lf Strinati wins, he goes pro.

l found out that Strinati's oponent it's your future son-in-law.

- Yes, unfortunately. - This is not nice.

How do you think this fight will end?

Strinati's good, he's a strong lad.

But the other one will try hard, if only to have the satisfaction to hit

a traffic policeman. We aren't liked too much.

- Who are you rooting for? - lf he wins, he'll marry my daughter!

- So you're rooting for him? - No, l want him to lose,

- so, maybe, he doesn't mary her! - This isn't nice.

lt's your daughter we're talking about, after all.

They've taken me away from traffic, but l'm always at crossroads.

l don't know... it's like...

lt's like you were there...

And, at the same time, from there comes an ambulance,

and from there the firemen's car! Who'd you let through?

- Who'd l let through? - Who... who...

We'll talk about this again.

Here's a fine.

Randolfi fines everyone, l think he exagerates.

Now he has fined a diplomatic corps car. Annul it.

- Good afternoon. - Good-bye, Spaziani.

- Good afternoon, sergeant. - Good afternoon.

- Manganiello! - Here! - l'm here.

- That's how you work? - That's how you enter?

- Eh? - That's how you enter?

Don't talk to me as if l was just a guard.

- Don't forget who l am! - Alright.

- Sergeant! - Don't joke. - l'm not joking.

lt's easy putting a sign with ''Please knock'' on the door.

This way one knocks, you hear, you awake and start working!

According to you, l don't do anything. l know what's being said around here!

They say l'm here because of recommandations,

and that you're the only ones working. You who only take a walk on the outside!

l'm always locked up in here, sacrificed!

l'm here morning, noon, evening, and even night.

- When someone doesn't wake you up. - One collapses!

- One collapses when doesn't sleep. - Why weren't you here yesterday morning?

- Wasn't l? - Why weren't you yesterday morning? - Where was l?

lt's not the friend talking, but the sergeant. Why weren't you here yesterday?

- l always have to account for my doings! - Speak clearly.

l have international relations, serving the Corps,

- with foreign states. - Which ones? - With a foreign state.

- Which one? - The Vatican.

- l went to see uncle monsignore. - l know.

- He gave you the saints! - Yes.

- And the medalions, true? - Yes. - Speaking about the medalions,

you must do me a holy pleasure!

- When you come to see me, use your feet. - Why?

The janitor has found in the elevator's cash box,

among coins, three Saint Ritas and a Saint Anthony!

Have you ever asked yourself why your elevator works so well?

Have you ever got stuck in the elevator? Never!

You should all thank Saint Anthony!

Every time l go up with the elevator, l put the medalion!

- Excuse-moi, monsieur. - Oui, monsieur!

How funny is this traffic policeman friend of mine!

- Making jokes? - l'm on duty here, in front of the school

- Are you angry, Alberto? - No.

- lf l stumble upon a french woman tourist l'll send her to you! - Send her.

- They don't know you've been flunked! - Laugh, laugh!

He hasn't even ever been to Paris!

- Excuse moi, monsieur. - Cut it out, Paolo!

Je voudrais savoir ou est Ia rue MeruIana.

l can't answer because l don't have the interpreter's sash.

S'iI vous pIait, pouvez vous me dire ou est Ia rue MeruIana?

l should answer you in ltalian, because, according to them, l don't speak French.

- Dites moi ou est Ia rue MeruIana. - Je vais vous Ie dire.

Vous aIIez tout ''droite'', jusque vous arrivez a Ia troisieme ''turn''to the right

- Comprenez? - Oui, oui.

AIIez, aIIez, aIIez, jusque vous arrivez a ''angIe'', vous trouvez un 'journaIier''.

- Le journaIier, vouz avez compris? - Oui.

Vous vous returnez comme ca et Ia-bas vous retroverez rue MeruIana.

- A gauche ou a droite? - A gauche et a droite, c'est egaI!

- Merci, monsieur. - Mais pas de quoi. - AIIons! - Au revoir.

A toute a I'heure, monsieur!

That's how l deal with it!

According to them, l don't speak no French so l couldn't have answered.

And where'd have the french pilgrim gone had l not answered him?

Gervasi! Did you hear the conversation?

You're a witness. Where does that madman dressed like a soldier think he's going?

''No way with red. ''

- So? - lt's the new title of the hymn.

lt's catchy. l'll write down the notes.

- lt's the American anthem! - American?

- What are you doing to me? - l'll change it! - That's it, Manganiello!

You're always absent, you never work, l'll drive you away from this office!

- l'll send you on duty at the dog pound! - As a musician or a traffic policeman?

At first as a musician, and then as a traffic policeman.

- Enough, l'm leaving. - Good-bye.

The first Toscanini that comes they call him maestro!

- Drop dea... - What did you just said? - Kiss your hands. - Alright.

What are you doing here? Get going!

Go away.

- What's there to laugh about? - Nothing.

Monsieur!

- Who is it? - C'est encore vous? - Oui, c'est toujours moi, dites.

Vous m'avez dit troisieme a droite, puis a gauche, Ia rue MeruIana, je Ia trouve pas!

What has he understood?

That policeman used to take French lessons with me, but he doesn't know one word!

Je vous ai dit: vous aIIez a droite, et vous trouvez Ie 'journaIier''.

Let's go, we'll have fun.

''Modestament'' je parIe bien francais.

Quand vous ''vois ''Ie 'journaIier'', Ia-bas iI y a un ''traffc Iight''.

- Quoi? - ''Traffic lights''! - Semaphore! - Le semaphore!

- How are you? - What are you doing here?

- Vous parIez francais, mademoiseIIe? - Oui, monsieur.

S'iI vous pIait, Ia rue MeruIana?

Vous prenez cette rue devant vous et Ia premiere a droite c'est Ia rue MeruIana.

- II m'a dit a droite, puis a gauche...! - II ne parIe pas francais!

C'est parceque iI y a une ''confussion''.

- Merci, mademoiseIIe. - De rien. - II n'est pas de quoi monsieur. Au revoir

Who taught you manners? How dare you interfere?

lf you do it once more, l'll fine for unauthorized translation.

- Take this glass-eyed away. Scram! - l can't leave here.

- l'm waiting for my dad to pick me up in his car. - Well done!

- He's coming in his car? - Yes. Whistle me when he arrives.

l'll show your dad!

- At your orders, sergeant. - Come here. - Yes, sergeant.

Have you gone off-duty already?

l've come to take another fine notebook, the one l took yesterday is full.

- You're giving 20 fines per day? - No, l give 40 a day!

Some good traffic policemen use a pair of shoes before finishing a

- fine notebook - With me a pack of cigarettes lasts more

- than a fine notebook. - Don't laugh.

Traffic policemen should be the older brothers

- of those using the streets. - l'm an only child.

- They have nice cars, l go by foot. - lt's that you're envious, then.

- No, l do my duty. - But because of you, and others like you,

- everybody hates us. - The pedestrian hates the car driver,

the car driver has a grudge against trolleybuses and taxis,

and those with trolleybuses and taxis hate pedestrians and car drivers.

- And they all hate us. - That's why we should be more lenient.

lt's not a matter of leniency, it's the characteristic of our job.

A traffic policeman on duty is not nice.

lt's like the dentist, he's useful. But is one pulling out your tooth nice?

But you pull out 40 teeth a day.

- l can't master my impulse, l whistle and... - Then look what you should do.

- Master your impulse, and, before whistling, count to 1 0. - Yes.

Try it.

l can even count to one hundred, but then l whistle.

You see?

This is your late mother's entire trousseau.

Never used, never touched.

Women want to have their trousseau, and then keep it locked

- their whole life. - And that's exactly why, dad.

We'll buy the things when we'll need them, one by one.

But why? Your mother didn't touch it, so she could leave it to you.

And then, you won't find such stuff today anymore. Feel the fabric!

- Look what a big towel. - lt has ''good afternoon'' written on it.

There were times when even linen had manners.

And this monogram? Mother's name was Maria, and here's an ''A''.

This was your grandmother's who didn't use it so she could leave it to your mother.

- And mother didn't touch it so she could leave it to you. - Listen.

Let's divide it in half, it's enough for us.

Sandro and l want something simple.

But even so, it costs a lot of money!

The invitations, we must send 7 candies to every person...

- and the white dress. - No, it doesn't matter, it's useless spending.

- l'll get married in my suit. - Don't say it even as a joke!

The white dress must be the first thing.

We'll give up the invitations, but we'll buy the white dress.

- Who knows how much it costs! - How much can it cost?

Enough with this, the white dress is my concern!

Are you sure mother's wedding dress isn't here?

No, don't you remember we made the dress for your First Communion from it?

- Don't you remember? - Yes, I do!

An enourmous dress! l can see it even now in front of my eyes, you were very cute.

You stumbled on it... Then we did the curtains for the living room...

And then from one of the curtains we got a doily,

- and from the other one, that got burnt, a bib for Tonino. - Yes!

- Here he is! - Who is it? - Sandro. He came to talk to you.

- Hi. - Hi. - Cut it out, dad is here! - lt doesn't matter.

- Cut it out, dad's waiting for you. - That's why l came.

- Hi, dad. - Hi.

- Are you also a fascist? - No, why? - ''Hi, dad''!

That's how we, sportsmen, salute one another.

Alright, but you didn't wave our hand.

- Be careful. lf you do it on the street, move your hand. - Alright.

- Marisa told me you wanted to talk to me. - Yes.

- So... l... - Yes?

- Shall we talk here? Like this? - Should we go in the ring?

- Put on our boxing gloves... - No, here is okay.

- Then let's hear what you want to tell me - lt's a simple thing.

- Marisa and me want to get married. - This l know, but when?

- Soon, right after the match. - Are you sure you'll win?

No, it's not about that. Still, l have trained well

- and then that policeman can't take hits. - Yes, traffic policeman don't take much.

But let's suppose that that policeman who doesn't take much

hits you that evening and makes you see stars?

- What will you do? - l've got an offer to enter bike races.

So you really are looking for trouble!

Boxing was not enough, you had to go with the bike too!

What will you eat, punches with tyres?

Don't worry about your daughter, l'll take care of everything.

l already saw the apartment we'll live in once married.

- You want to live far from here? - Yes.

- lf l'd stay in the living room, you could sleep here. - No.

- No? - A married couple should live far away if they want to go along fine.

- So that you two can go along fine? - No, son-in-law and father-in-law.

- So that we two should go along? - Yes. - We already don't!

- Do you love this youngman? - Of course, dad.

- Even if he loses? - Even more then. - Really?

Then we'll talk about the marriage, on the evening of the match.

l hope this chest full of stuff will serve as a medicine box.

Yes!

- A bride's dress? - Yes. - Sergeant, are you kiddin'?

No, l'm serious.

A dentist can pull of a tooth to a man as well as to a woman.

- What's that got to do? - lt has, you're a dressmaker.

Yes, l'm a dressmaker, but l make make army uniforms.

Then, you can also make a woman's dress.

A woman's body is like a man's.

- But l've never made one, l don't know how. - No? Alright.

lf your brother-in-law's application falls into my hands,

l can't promise you to help him...

One hand washes the other.

- Bye. - No, just a sec...

Alright, sergeant, l'll try.

- But l take no responsibility. - What are you saying?

- l must look good with my daughter. - l'll do my best.

- You must make a nice bride's dress. - l understood.

- But you must buy the fabric. - Don't you have it?

- l can't use army fabric. - Why not?

lt's just fabric. Before being sewen, it isn't army fabric.

For white uniforms, you use white fabric.

- And then put 4 golden buttons and a whistle. - ls it too heavy?

- No... - What fabric do you need? - For a bride's dress

- you use satin, tulle. - Alright, l'll buy it. How much do we need?

Around 5 meters of satin, trimmings,

- another 5 meters of tulle... 1 0 meters in all. - You say it as if it were 1 0 cm!

- That's what's needed. And her size? - The normal ones, she's a normal girl.

- Normal! - She's 20 years old. - Now l'm making it blindly!

- So you need... - Her exact measurements.

- l'll call a girl looking like my daughter. - No. - Why?

Do y ou want to ruin me? l'm doing this on the side.

You exagerate, it sounds like you were making the atomic bomb!

- l've finished the hymn. - Bravo!

- Embrace me. - For so little! - No, embrace me.

What are you doing? l have to see something!

Why are you sniffing? lt doesn't stink.

Lower yourself a moment.

- Yes, my daughter's nose comes up to here, to the chin. - So?

When we kiss, it comes up to here.

- But l need the measurements of her back, her waist... - Excuse me.

- What are you doing? - Excuse me.

She has a smaller waits, but this is the height, from here up to here.

- And her back? - Don't touch me! - Stay put!

- Alright! - Got it? lt's almost like this.

Thank you lads, you can go. See you next Sunday. Good evening.

Good evening.

- Randolfi! - Yes. - Come here.

- Yes, maestro. - Bravo, Randolfi. - Thank you.

- You're a very good tympanum player. - Thank you. - Here is a report

- with policeman's Randolfi Alberto productivity. - lsn't it good?

Yes, you're a very good element, you don't make problems to your superiors,

you fulfill your tasks with zeal, punctuality and precision

and write more than 40 fines a day.

- Even more. - lt really is a record, but, in my opinion, you overdo it.

You've fined the diplomatic corps, MPs...

You've even fined a police captain!

Sure, when they're driving, they're just ordinary car drivers.

Do traffic laws say that the ambassador

- must go on the red light? - What have traffic laws to do with it!

Sometimes you must know how to close your eyes.

Two eyes aren't enough to see what happens and you ask me to close one!

l will disregard the traffic laws,

only if you order me to.

Have you gone mad? l've never said such a thing!

But there's a report from Police Headquarters

and another one from the Firebrigade Headquarters.

No traffic policeman had ever fined firemen

for excessive speed.

The fire had been put out, they shouldn't have sped returning to the barracks.

lf you don't want to be transferred, you must try not to exagerate.

ln Rome if one does one's duty, one gets transferred.

There's another discipline in the North,

but in Rome we go past it, we forgive.

Spaziani and Manganiello didn't attend rehearseal, and that's serious, sergeant.

They had my permission because tonight it's the boxing match.

- ls boxing more important than Rossini? - ln this instance, yes.

We have a lot of time to rehearse Rossini, but boxing is tonight.

- Alright? - l've got it, but don't let Rossini find it out.

l can stay quiet.

- Five, six... - He doesn't get up. - Then he has won.

- Nine... - Saved by the bell!

l should have given him Saint Christopher's medalion.

- But he's the patron saint of car drivers - lt's the same thing.

- Dad, go tell him no to give up. - l don't know if he understands anymore.

Go encourage him, dad!

- He's losing because you never leave him alone. - Cut it out!

- May l? - Not now. - l'm a relative.

- How are you? - Like this!

- Want an advice? - Yes.

- Give it up. - What? - Give it up!

- Why? - lt's better.

lt's better for you, give it up.

- l'm sorry for you. - Why?

- lf l'd win, l make you a nice surprise. - That of winning?

- No. - Then what do you care! Let it go.

But if l'd win, l'd...

You can't be here, sergeant.

- He said he had a surprise. - Yes.

- What was that about? - lf he had won, he'd have taken you with him.

- Where? - Around ltaly,

- abroad, in America... - Me? - Yes.

- What for? - As a manager, an administrator.

And l'd give up my job...

After so many years on the beat, he'd have taken you off the streets.

Referee, give him an advice!

Are you mad, what have you been planning?

- Would he make a lot of money? - No!

- No? And then... - l wasn't talking to you, he got hit.

- Would he make money? - Of course.

Time!

Take this.

- So? - He won't last the third round. - Who? - Your son-in-law.

- He won't make it. - You can never know.

- He'll lose. - You can never know.

- There's another round. - No, he'll lose.

- Finish him up. - l can't make it, sergeant.

ln the second round? Are you mad?

- l've got no breath anymore. - Find it.

Hit him to the chin, come on!

- l'll give you a ten days special leave. - l'll try.

- You'll win, come on! - Hope so.

Sandro!

Come on! Come on!

Bravo!

Come on, Sandro!

Come on, Sandro!

lt's not nice what Spaziani does. The corps is the corps!

- Come on, hit him! - Kill him!

Come on, Sandro!

One, two, three, four,

fve, six, seve, eight, nine,

ten... Out!

Bravo!

Madison Square Garden on the phone.

- Bravo! - Bravo!

- He has won, daddy! - Spaziani's great.

- Does it hurt? - Yes.

- ls it swollen? - A little.

Ah! My nose!

How long will it take until you'll have a champ's nose?

- lt's almost there. - l know, you're very ugly.

You've got a scar on your fronthead.

And a black eye.

Your nose's broken.

Ah! You mustn't kiss me, it hurts!

l can't kiss you before the match because you'd lose weight,

and after the match you're all smashed up!

What am I to do?

- l don't know if you'd marry a boxer. - l wouldn't.

l mean if you were a girl.

lf you'd be the boxer, then l would.

You're joking, but l've thought about it.

l don't know if you'd be happy, marrying me.

There'll be times, during training,

when you'll sleep in the other room...

- You'll have to make so many sacrifices. - You'll make them also.

But will you be happy?

No.

l won't be happy.

l will be miserable.

But it doesn't matter.

- Damn! - Be careful, you're ruinig the dress!

- Stand straight! - Remember l'm a traffic policeman.

- Stay calm! - l'll fine you. - Don't argue now.

- Carmelo, it seems a little high-necked. - He has a collar.

- We should take it out... - lt hurts. - Don't move, l'm not choking you.

- But it hurts. - Be a good boy.

Let your hand down.

- You need to enrich it here. - l'll make two folds. - Move your hand!

lf my uncle monsignore would find out...

- And this belly? - l ate. - l told you to fast.

l couldn't make fasting all this time.

- What's this bump? - lt's the whistle.

- You were it inside? - lt slipped.

- Turn. - l'm very hot.

l hope it looks well on my daughter, because on him it makes you sick.

Where's the bride?

These two have already come.

- You're beautiful! - Aunt! - lt seems incredible you're getting married.

l've brought you the wedding present: six towels.

We must hurry up, girls.

Let me see you.

Your husband is waiting for you on the church steps.

- Where's your father? - There.

- Has he seen you? - No. - Who knows how emotioned he'll get!

Pietro!

Pietro, where are you?

Have you seen how beautiful Marisa is dressed as a bride?

l fancied seeing your late wife. What are you doing here?

Nothing...

- Aren't you feeling well? - l'm fine, l was only thinking.

One suffers all his life so that his daughter lacks nothing,

waits for a nice youngman to come and marry her,

and is anxiously waiting for the wedding day,

and when that day comes...

He reallizes it is not a beautiful day.

Well, it's not beautiful, but neither is it a bad one!

lt's cold, but it don't rain. l'm sure it won't rain.

- l haven't brought an umbrella! See the new hat? - Nice.

- Now what is it? - Nothing.

There's something, come on, tell me!

You must confide in me, l'm your sister!

l got it, you don't like the groom?

- lt's not me who's marrying him. - Then?

Your daughter loves him, he has a good job...

He even bought a car!

Pietro, you're not happy.

No, l'm happy! Of course, it's a strange happiness.

- Why? - lt makes me want to cry.

lt happens! Remember the day you got married?

Speak the truth, was l happy then?

How had l cried!

l didn't tell you, but l went behind a pillar and cried.

The priest saw me! My brother was getting married, and there l was, crying!

And l wasn't your daughter!

Do you like it, dad? Look at me!

How do l look?

Do you like it?

- You're an angel! - lt's because of your dress!

l'll pin this flower, you must be more beautiful than the bride!

You have to leave, Sandro's waiting in front of the church.

l was talking to your aunt, she made me lose track of time.

She told me she has bought a new hat,

- and then started crying... - When?

- This is not a day for crying! - Happy you you don't get emotional!

Me, l'm very moved!

- Where are we going? - At home, they must change, they'll leave right away.

- They leave like this? - How? - Without eating?

Sister, haven't you seen the ''No right turn'' sign?

No, it's for the first time we've come this way.

Have you had the licence for long?

- Two years. - You didn't remember?

- Where're you coming from? - From the market, we went shopping.

Nuns, he stopped even you? They'll excommunicate you!

Excuse him, there are a lot of uneducated people, without any respect.

- Do you agree? - Why? With what?

l told you, there was a ''No right turn'' sign.

- l'll fine you. - Fine?

Do you accept it, or should l send it to the convent?

We've only got 1 8 minutes, you won't catch the train.

- Can't you drive faster? - There's a lot of traffic.

- l can see that. - And there even are traffic policemen to make things worse!

- ls it their fault? - You speak like this because you don't know them.

lf you'd know what kind of people they are!

Maybe those enforcing traffic, but not those in the offices.

- They all are... - They are all what?

All the same!

Ah, beh! Drive on!

And you were taking their side! They amuse themselves making us lose time.

lt's Randolfi, make him change his hand! Hurry up!

- What did he say? - That he doesn't care a damn.

- Give him the horn. - He'll fine me.

- Blow the horn, l'm telling you. - Wait.

Stop!

Please, cross. Wait, please.

Easy, grandpa.

Wait, calm.

Go!

- At your orders, sergeant. - l have to speak to you. - Yes, sergeant.

Headquarters have sent me a communication

- about your intransigence - lntransigence?

l remember, here, in Rome, you call it intransigence!

But in Northern ltaly they call it traffic discipline!

- Yes, in Northern ltaly. - ln Northern ltaly.

- Come, l must tell you something. - Good news, sergeant?

l don't think so. l don't like it, you were even a good tympanum player...

- l was? - Yes, you were. Come.

Was?

Hi, dad! Bravo!

Hi!

Had l been Rossini, l'd have changed the tempo.

lt always is the same, it never changes.

Never! Always the same music, never changes!

Come on!

Rossini is always Rossini, madame!

lmbecile!

Damn you, Alberto, you and your fines!

Hi!

Colleague.

Mister colleague.

The bearded man.

The Gallery.

The Motta.

The cake.

The soldier.

Where's the way to Rome?

Go straight...

The blues.

Damn, what a blues l've got!