Original subtitles

jmg subs

Well, we haven't, uh, read the plaque.

We'll... read the plaque.

"Here men from the planet Earth...

first set foot upon the moon...

July 1969.

We came in peace for all mankind."

If this isn't an insanely beautiful woman, I'm hanging up.

Sir, I... I... I think you should listen to this.

Goddamn it! Sir?

Sir? Damn!

Come on, baby. Come on, baby.

Come on, baby. Come on.

This better not be another damn Russian spy job.

Boys from Air Traffic Res say skies are clear.

It's the real thing.

A radio signal from another world.

Let... let's not jump the gun, here.

Get online with Space Command.

They're gonna want to know about...

Jeez, what's with the golf balls?

You're gonna kill me, here! Wait, wait. This can't be right.

The calculated distance from source...

is only 375,000 kilometers.

It's coming from the moon.

Who else knows about this?

SETI in New Mexico identified a signal...

but, uh, they're even more confused than we are, sir.

Excuse me.

Major?

Yes, sir.

Radar reception has been impaired...

but we were able to get these.

Now, we estimate...

that it has a diameter of over 550 kilometers...

and a mass roughly 1/4 the size of our moon.

What the hell is it?

A meteor?

No, sir.

No. Definitely not.

How do you know?

Well, sir, it's... slowing down.

It's what?

It's, uh... it's slowing down, sir.

Get me the secretary of defense.

Then wake him!

Hello.

Hi. It's me.

Hi.

What time is it there?

It's 2:45 in the morning.

I know I didn't wake you.

As a matter of fact, you did.

Liar.

I have a confession to make.

I'm sleeping next to a beautiful young brunette.

You didn't let her stay up all night watching TV...

did you?

Of course not.

You're gonna come home right after the luncheon, right?

Yes, yes, yes, yes. Mommy?

Here's your mother.

Hi, honey.

Hi. I miss you.

I know.

President Whitmore's... Me too.

approval ratings have slipped below 40%.

Even his crime bill failed to pass.

Are the salad days over for President Whitmore? Morton?

Leadership as a pilot in the Gulf War...

is completely different from leadership in politics.

Daddy let me watch Letterman.

Traitor.

That's the problem. They elected a warrior, and they got a wimp.

Good morning, George.

Good morning, Mr. President.

That game couldn't have been pretty.

Thank you, sir.

Connie, you're up awfully early this morning.

They're not attacking your policies.

They're attacking your age.

Addressing congress...

Whitmore seems less like the President...

and more like the orphan child Oliver...

asking, "Please, sir, I'd like some more."

That's clever.

If so, I'm not laughing.

Age was never an issue when you stuck to your guns.

You were thought of as young, idealistic.

Now the message has gotten lost.

It's just too much politics. It's too much compromise.

Isn't it amazing...

how quickly everyone can turn against you?

Excuse me, Mr. President. It's the secretary of defense.

Yes.

Can you say that again?

Station WXBY, out here in Brooklyn.

The temperature is 95 degrees in Central Park.

What it is here in the borough, God only knows.

Let's go to Nick Jones.

He'll give us a traffic report at the beaches.

So, why are you waiting? Hmm?

My social security will expire, you'll still be sitting there.

I'm thinking.

Yeah, well, think already.

Do you have any idea how long it takes...

for those cups to decompose?

If you don't move soon, I'm gonna start to decompose.

Ah... ah.

Listen, David, I've been meaning to talk with you.

It's nice that you see me so much now, but...

Don't... don't start, Dad.

I'm only saying it's been, what, four years?

You're still wearing your wedding band?

Three years. All right, three, four.

You're divorced. Come on, move on. This is not healthy.

No, this is not healthy. Smoking is... is not healthy.

Checkmate.

Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute.

Wait, wait, wait. This is not...

this is not checkmate. See you tomorrow, Pop.

Now, just... just hold on. This is not checkmate!

Ahh, checkmate.

Yes, we've got everybody we have working on the problem.

We are doing every...

I love X-Files, too. I hope you get to see it.

Good morning. Compact cable.

Anna will take care of you. David? David!

What the hell's the point of having a beeper...

if you're not gonna turn it on?

It was turned on. I was ignoring you.

Hello. What's the, uh... What's the big emergency?

It started this morning.

Every station's making like it's the 1950s.

We got static, we got snow. All kinds of distortions.

Marty? Nobody knows...

What the hell are you doing?

There's a reason we have bins labeled "Recycle."

What the hell is going on? My God in heaven!

So, sue me. David? We've got a problem!

Did you try to switch transponder channels?

Oh, please...

you think I'd be this panicked if it was something simple?

Okay. Let's point the dish to another satellite.

We tried that. It didn't work.

It's almost as though they weren't even there.

All right, all right. What've we got here?

This is impossible.

We created a race of robots.

Their function...

Miguel, the signal's all screwed up.

Stop it! Just leave it alone.

You're gonna break it, all right?

Ah, it's so fuzzy.

Oh, no.

Good morning, Lucas.

You see these? I got a whole goddamn crop full of these.

If your father's not in the air in 20 minutes...

I'm getting someone else.

Hey!

Russell?

Hey, Miguel!

Whoaaaa!

Whooooo!

Yahhhh-hoooo!

Russell! What are you doing?

Whoo!

Just what in the hell do you think you're doing?

Whoa!

It's the wrong field, you idiot.

Lucas' farm is on the other side of town.

Are you sure?

CNS is running a story that we're covering up...

some type of nuclear testing experiment.

Well, tell them to run with it...

if they want to embarrass themselves.

NASA's been on my butt all morning.

They want to know our position.

Our official position is, we have no official position.

Connie, what is going on, here? Connie...

Come on guys, would I keep you out of the loop, huh?

Yes, absolutely. In a second!

What? I can't hear you.

At the moment, our satellites are somewhat unreliable.

Isn't it possible that this thing may just pass us by?

What if it doesn't "pass us by"?

Let's re-target some ICBMs to blow it outta the sky.

And risk turning one dangerous falling object into many?

We don't yet know enough about what we're dealing with...

to make any kind of intelligent judgments.

Luckily, the press is making up their own story, at this point.

But that's not gonna keep.

We may need to upgrade to DEFCON three.

Absolutely. General, contact NORAD.

You tell them we've upgraded to DEFCON three.

That's not what the President said.

Wouldn't you think, that's a little premature?

I don't think so. We have more than 50%...

of the armed forces out on weekend leave...

not to mention the commanders and troops...

that are in town for the 4th of July parade.

Go ahead, Commander. Our intelligence tells us...

the object has settled into a stationary orbit.

Well, that's good news.

Uh, not really, sir. Part of it has broken off...

into nearly three dozen other pieces...

smaller than the whole, sir...

yet over fifteen miles in width, themselves.

Where are they heading?

They should be entering our atmosphere...

within the next twenty-five minutes.

This better be good.

Captain on deck!

Sir, we're looking at a total radar blackout...

over a thirteen kilometer area.

Let's do a diagnostic check... Excuse me, sir.

The radar may be malfunctioning, but the infrared...

is totally off the map.

Jeez!

Get me Atlantic Command on the line.

Hang on, sir.

Sir, we have visual range with incoming, over Iraqi airspace.

Second sighting?

Yes, sir. This just came in from the Persian Gulf.

Correction, sir.

We now have two confirmed visual contacts.

That's affirmative. Mr. President...

they're tracking another one off the California coastline.

All right, go ahead. Put it on.

General, you might want to watch this.

Ladies and gentlemen...

ladies and gentlemen...

we are interrupting our regular broadcast...

to bring you extraordinary events...

taking place in the Russian Republic.

This unexplained disturbance...

and the hysteria that it's causing, are incredible.

How would you describe what you're seeing?

It is clearing the mountains...

moving too slowly...

to be a comet, or meteor.

Widespread panic has gripped the countryside...

as thousands have taken to the streets.

It is confirmed. The unexplained phenomenon...

is headed for Moscow.

Mr. President, we have an AWAC off the west coast.

Three minutes.

I don't understand it, sir. Side radar doesn't see it.

I know. It's blind, sir.

Nothing is registering.

Negative. We have zero visibility.

Visibility is at... zero.

Command, this is Eagle Eye 370.

Captain, the president is listening.

Repeat what you just told me.

We still have zero visibility.

Instrumentation is malfunctioning.

We can't get any kind of reading...

of what's in front of us. Wait a minute.

May be clearing.

Pull up, pull up!

Line's gone, sir.

Two more have been spotted over the Atlantic.

One's moving toward New York, the other's headed this direction.

How much time do we have? Less than ten minutes.

Alex, organize a military escort.

Mr. President, I strongly recommend...

we move you to a secure location, immediately.

Connie, can we expect the same kind of panic we saw in Russia?

More than likely.

We can discuss this on the way. I'm not leaving.

We have to maintain a working government...

I want you to get the Vice President, the whole cabinet...

and joint chiefs, and take them to a secured location.

I'm staying. I don't want to add to a public hysteria...

that's gonna cost lives.

Connie.

Yes, sir?

We'll initiate the Emergency Broadcast System.

We'll advise people not to panic.

The best idea right now is to stay in their homes.

Yes, sir. Roy. Dean.

And, Alex, you contact the cabinet members.

Have them rendezvous here. We'll take them to NORAD.

Alert the Vice President...

Mr. President, with your permission...

I'd like to remain at your side.

I had a feeling you would.

And what happens if they do become hostile?

Then God help us.

There it is, the strange atmospheric phenomenon.

It is apparently what has been causing...

all the distortions in our broadcasts.

David, are you watching this?

...not to react in a manner of cold fear.

We have no evidence that these phenomena are endangering anyone.

Thus far, reports of aggression...

Marty, lis... listen to this.

I got a lock on the pattern of that signal...

so we can filter it out. But, if my calculations are right...

it's going to be gone in, like, seven hours, anyway.

It's reducing itself every time it recycles...

so eventually it's gonna disappear...

You listening?

Can you believe this?

David, haven't you been watching?

David? General.

Good afternoon.

So far, the phenomenon has not caused any damage.

We have to ask you to try to stay calm...

and it's important for everyone not to panic.

We have a fix on three of the occurrences...

about to appear over...

It's just unreal. American cities.

Hey, Miguel, come here.

One is headed towards Los Angeles.

The other two are on our eastern seaboard...

headed towards New York, and Washington, D.C.

Marty?

Marty, Jamie says this building has an old bomb shelter.

We're heading down there now.

All right. Um, everybody, head down to the basement.

Take it slow. Don't run.

Walk down to the basement.

There's no shame in hiding.

Oh, I better call my mother.

Well, look who we have here.

Hey, Russ, I heard you had a little trouble, this morning.

Dusted the wrong field.

I know you're probably still a little confused...

from your hostage experience.

Hostage experience?

Did something happen to you, Russ?

Oh, yeah. Seems years back, our boy was kidnapped by aliens.

Did all kinds of experiments on him.

Tell them about it, Russ.

Get a couple beers in him, he'll tell you all about it.

Crazy stuff. Won't you, Russ?

Russ, when they took you up in their spaceship...

did they do any...

sexual things, do you recall? D' you recollect?

Oh, Russ!

Let's get outta here. What's going on?

What's going on? What's that?

Let's get outta here. Come on.

Oh, wow.

Mommy, look it!

Mmm...

It's too early, baby.

Is it a earthquake?

Not even a four pointer.

Go back to sleep.

Mmm...

Daddy!

What are you doing here?

You should be down in the shelter.

What's going on?

Come on! Pass it over here, man!

Come on, come on!

Unh!

Aren't you coming, David? No, I gotta see it.

That's cool, man!

You jerk!

Whoa!

The signal.

My God.

Now what do we do?

Address the nation.

There's gonna be a lot of frightened people, out there.

Yeah.

I'm one of them.

Hey, hey, hey. Come on.

He's just trying to impress you.

If you want to impress me, you need to get a job...

and stop slobbering all over my shoe.

I don't believe this. Jasmine.

Neighbors moving out.

Guess they finally got tired of all these quakes.

A little shake, and they running.

Police and the fire departments have asked everyone...

to stay off the phone.

Baby, there's something on the news about the quake.

The police are asking us not to call 911.

What's up, man?

Hey, Steve. What you been doing, out there?

Shooting the aliens.

Oh, you shooting aliens, right? You think you tough, huh?

What you got? Turn around. Turn around, hands behind your head...

Come on, Boomer. Let's get you something to eat.

Good... uh, nnnnn... oh, now, watch out!

Watch it now, baby.

I'll go grab the paper. All right.

Ow!

Darn...

Honey, let's go!

Babe, you want some of this coffee?

Babe?

Boom, boom, boom!

Pentagon officials are reporting...

more ships have just arrived...

over the capitals of India, England, and Germany...

bringing estimates up to anywhere from ten to fifteen...

of these city-sized spacecrafts.

I know, Ma.

Just try and stay calm.

Tell her to pack up and leave town.

Why, what happened?

Just do it!

Hello, Ma. Ma, listen.

Get your stuff together and head for Aunt Esther's.

Don't argue with me. Just go!

David, why did I just send my mother to Atlanta?

David?

David, talk to me. Did you hear me tell you...

that the signal hidden in the satellite feed...

is slowly recycling down to extinction?

Not really.

It's a countdown.

A countdown?

Wait, a countdown to what, David?

Uh, it's like in chess.

First you strategically position your pieces...

then when the timing's right...

you... strike.

See?

They're positioning themselves all over the world...

using this one signal to synchronize their efforts.

In approximately six hours, the signal's going to disappear...

and the countdown's going to be over.

And then what?

Checkmate.

Oh, my God...

Oh, my God!

Oh my God, I've got to call my brother.

I'd better call my housekeeper.

I gotta call my lawyer.

Eh, forget my lawyer.

Ladies and gentlemen...

the President of the United States.

Good afternoon.

My fellow Americans...

a historic and unprecedented event has occurred.

The question of whether or not...

we're alone in the universe...

has been answered.

Although it's understandable...

that many of us feel a sense of hesitation, or even fear...

we must attempt to reserve judgment...

He says he's your husband.

Oh, God.

What do you want?

You got to leave the White House.

This is hardly the time, nor the place...

to be having that same old discussion!

You don't understand. You got to leave Washington.

Well, in case you haven't noticed...

we are having a little bit of a crisis, here.

They're communicating with a hidden signal.

They're going to attack!

You are just being paranoid!

It's not paranoia. Shh!

The embedding's very subtle.

It's probably been overlooked. If...

Marty, what are you doing?

Get out of town as soon as you can.

Please? Okay, okay.

My staff and I will remain in the White House...

as we attempt to establish communication.

If you feel compelled to leave these cities...

please do so in an orderly fashion.

Hey! What's going on?

Excuse me.

Coming through!

The arrival of the alien visitors...

has caused over ten thousand fender-benders...

in just a few seconds' time...

but this is just the beginning...

Uh-uh. Come on, now, you can't go.

You got to call them back.

I'm not going to do this with you, Jasmine.

I've got to report to El Toro.

But you said you was on leave for the 4th.

Yeah, well, they canceled it!

Look, why are you acting like this?

Why?

That's why.

Look...

I really don't think they flew 90 billion light years...

to come down here and start a fight...

and get all rowdy.

Look, why don't you just relax?

I'm going to report to El Toro, and find out what's going on.

What are you doing in there, man?

Nothing. I'm just driving.

Honk honk!

Look. Here, I got these for you.

Firecrackers.

Now you be careful.

Steve, wait.

I want to tell you something.

What is it, Jasmine?

You take care of yourself, you hear?

Look, um...

why don't you get some things packed...

and you and Dylan come stay with me on the base.

And you will see, that there is nothing to be scared of.

Really?

You don't mind?

Well, I mean, uh...

we'll have to let all my other girlfriends know...

that they can't come over, you know...

and got to postpone a little freaky-deaky.

There you go.

There he goes, thinking you all that.

But you are not as charming as you think you are, sir.

Yes, I am.

Them big ol' Dumbo ears.

Well, look at you with them chicken legs.

Baw-caw!

Come on, Dylan, honey.

Look out! Look out!

What? Hey!

The television said...

they started the looting, already.

Vultures!

You still have the Plymouth?

You want to borrow the car?

David, you don't have a license.

You're driving.

Yeah, I'm driving. I'm driving?

Come on, come on.

I really want you out of Los Angeles.

You're staying there to keep people calm.

It's the right thing to do.

I'm not going to let them criticize you for it.

I appreciate your trying to help me.

Liar. Stick to the truth.

It's what you're good at.

All right. I'll tell you the truth.

I don't want you in any one of those cities.

I'll leave as soon as the interviews are done.

All right. There's a helicopter waiting.

They're going to take you to Nellis.

And the munchkin?

She's going to meet you there.

All right.

I love you.

Bye.

Communication attempts in thirty languages...

over all common frequencies have failed.

Bye.

It's the White House, for crying out loud.

You can't just drive up and ring a bell.

Can't this thing go any faster?

What, you think they don't know what you know?

They know. Believe me, they know.

She works for the president.

They know everything.

They don't know this.

Oh, oh. You're going to educate them, huh?

So, tell me something.

You're so smart, how come you spend eight years at M.I.T...

to become a cable repairman?

All I'm saying is..

they got people who handle these things, David.

They want HBO, they'll call you.

Look at these people. Look. Huh?

Vultures.

They take, and then they go.

Yeah, they're going. They're going faster than we are.

Look at this. We're in the fast lane.

I can't go faster. They're cutting me off here.

No one's cutting you off. We're going to get a ticket.

They're getting in front of me. I can't go any faster.

All right, all right.

I don't want to argue, I don't want to argue.

Let's just get there, as quickly...

as possible. What's the rush, uh?

You think we'll get to Washington and it won't be there?

A local crop duster was arrested today...

as he peppered City Hall with leaflets from the air.

Everybody's leaving.

Can you give us some of your time?

Do you want to make a statement?

We've got to stop them!

I was kidnapped by space aliens ten years ago.

They did all kinds of experiments on me.

They've been studying us for years...

finding out our weaknesses.

We've gotta stop them!

They're gonna kill us all!

Some people attribute his eccentric behavior...

to post-traumatic stress syndrome...

from his service as a pilot in Vietnam.

Others, however, have a more unusual theory.

How would you describe Mr. Casse?

Keeps to himself. Private.

Quiet. Real quiet.

When they took him up in the spaceship...

the aliens abused him...

sexually.

Mr. Casse is in the county lockup this evening...

Pack up. We're leaving.

Due to extenuating circumstances...

he may be released later tonight.

Miguel, what about Dad?

This could be our last night on Earth.

You don't want to die a virgin...

do you?

Come on. We're going.

No. I'm not going anywhere.

Miguel!

Stop it!

Thanks a lot, partner.

And remember...

get as far away from these things, as you can.

You read my mind!

We got to get as far away from these things, as we can.

They let you out?

You're damn right.

They got bigger fish to fry now...

believe you me.

Come on, boy.

Once again, the L.A.P.D. is asking Los Angelenos...

not to fire their guns at the visitor spacecraft.

You may inadvertently trigger an interstellar war.

Think we can find something better...

to do with our time, gentlemen?

Where you been, Stevie?

Man, this is unbelievable.

This is, like, huge.

They've recalled everybody.

Oh, well, looks like the mail's still working.

Oh! Oh, oh...

Uh, you're going to do the honors for me, man.

You're a wuss.

Yeah, whatever. Shut up and read it.

It says...

"Captain Steven Hiller...

loser.

United States Marine Corps...

blah blah blah, blah blah blah.

We regret to inform you...

that despite your excellent record of service..."

I'm sorry, man.

You know what you need to do?

You need to, like, kiss some serious booty...

to get ahead in this world, man.

That's what I'm trying to tell you.

See, I like the one-knee approach...

because it puts the bootie, like...

right in front of the lips...

What's this?

That's nothing. Hold on.

Hold on, man. What is this?

Jasmine kind of has a thing for dolphins.

I don't know. Stevie, this is a wedding ring.

I thought you said you were going...

to break the whole thing, off.

Yeah...

Man, you know I really like Jasmine.

You know that, right?

Man, you're never going to get to fly the space shuttle...

if you marry a stripper.

"It could only happen in California" file...

here's Wendy Walsh with a special report.

Below us, we can see hundreds of UFO fanatics...

who have gathered on rooftops here in downtown Los Angeles...

to welcome the new arrivals.

Oh, God! I hope they bring back Elvis!

I just came in to get my check tonight...

and I got talked into working.

Oh, I must have been tripping.

It's being called the party event of the century...

and everyone is invited, especially you-know-who.

This is so cool.

Girl, please.

Oh, hey. I made it before I came in, tonight.

Check it out.

Now, I know you're not thinking about joining those idiots.

Oh, I am going over there as soon as I get off.

You want to come?

Tiffany, listen to me a sec.

I have got a really bad feeling about this.

I don't want you to go.

Now, promise me you won't.

Oh.

Come on, girl, promise me.

I promise.

Okay.

Look...

I'm out of town for a while.

Later. Bye.

Everyone in the world is trying to get out of Washington.

We're the only schmucks trying to get in.

Should establish some line of communication.

What the hell is that?

Pops, this is every phone book in America.

You think an important person like Constance is gonna be listed?

She always keeps her portable phone listed, for emergencies.

Demonstrators in front of the White House...

are protesting the military involvement...

with our first contact with the alien visitors.

So? You want to ring the bell, or should I?

Oh, perfect. She's using it.

Perfect? What's perfect?

It's busy.

Yeah. I can use her signal...

to triangulate her exact position in the White House.

You can do that?

Yeah.

All cable repairmen can, Pops.

The visitors have arrived...

but the President remains at the White House.

Are Mr. Whitmore's actions: A) ultra brave...

or B) foolhardy?

What?

Now don't hang up, sweetie.

David! How did you get this number?

Do me a favor. Walk to the window.

And I'm looking for what?

You'll see.

Over here.

See us?

We're here.

How does he do that?

Reporting live from Andrews Air Force Base...

just outside Washington, D.C...

Yes, that's right, Tom, an amazing moment.

We're reporting from Andrews Air Force Base...

Now, in light of our apparent inability...

to communicate with the visitors...

Pentagon officials have retrofit this skylift helicopter...

with a type of visual communications device.

Mr. President.

Be seated.

This is not a military aircraft...

Where are we now?

They're just commencing lift-off.

And refitted with these enormous light panels...

that are attached to the hull and onto the sides.

Echo One, Welcome Wagon is in the air.

I repeat, Welcome Wagon is in the air.

Roger, Welcome Wagon.

Echo One right beside you.

This is something I would never believe in my lifetime...

that I would be in the White House.

Look at this.

If I knew I was going to meet the President...

I would have worn a tie.

I mean, look at me. I look like a schlemiel.

You look fine, Pops.

Oh, my God.

David, I don't know how happy he's going to be to see you.

That's right. I'm telling you...

we're wasting time.

He's not going to listen to me. We should go.

Why wouldn't he listen?

'Cause last time I saw him...

we, uh, we got into a fight.

You walked into the room and punched him in the head.

You punched the President?

He wasn't the President, then.

I punched him, he fought back, we wrestled around.

It was a fight.

A fight that you started...

because David thought that I was having an affair.

With the President?

Which, of course, I wasn't.

You know, either go get him...

or, we should head back to the car.

All right. I'll get him. You wait here...

and don't touch anything.

You punched the President?

Mein Gott!

Nearing point of contact, Echo One.

We're closing in.

Roger that.

You're going to commence sequence when ready.

The three choppers are steadily approaching...

what has been unanimously agreed...

to be the front of these spaceships...

a parabolic indentation nine city blocks...

You're leaving now?

David, see if they got those pens...

that they give away.

Dad, what?

I don't have time for this.

Two minutes, Tom. Connie...

Mr. President...

Julius Levinson. David is my son.

I told you he wouldn't listen.

David, you have to tell him.

Connie.

David, tell him!

Uh, I know why we have satellite disruption.

All right. Go ahead.

Okay.

Um...

Let's say that you want to coordinate with spaceships...

on different sides of the Earth.

You couldn't send a direct signal, right?

You're talking about line of sight.

Yeah, that's right. Exactly.

The curve of the Earth prevents it.

You'd need satellites to relay that signal...

in order to reach each ship.

Well, I found a signal...

hidden inside our own satellite system.

Excuse me, Mr. President.

They're starting.

They're using our own satellites against us...

and the clock is ticking.

Bringing it in to hover.

Welcome Wagon, Echo One.

Approaching alien ship.

Initiating communications sequence, Echo One.

Welcome Wagon has commenced.

General Grey, coordinate with the Atlantic Command.

Tell them to evacuate as many people...

out of the cities, as they can.

Yes, sir.

Get those helicopters away from the ship.

Call them back, immediately.

What the hell's going on?

We're leaving. Kim, my daughter.

Uh, there's something happening, here.

They're responding.

Something's opening.

Something is happening.

It looks like there's some kind of activity, here.

This may be some type of response, Echo One.

We see it, too. Can't identify it.

We are evacuating.

I repeat. We are evacuating the White House.

Load the rest of the staff in the second helicopter.

Who should we pick?

Is my wife in the air?

She will be shortly.

Nice. Very nice.

Okay. Buckle up. Latch secure.

Look, we have our own phone.

Let's move outta here!

The President's ordered an evacuation.

We have to leave now.

And our prayers go out to the wives and children...

of those brave pilots.

Indeed, God help us all.

The visitors responded with terrifying...

Authorities have called for...

a complete evacuation of Los Angeles County.

People are advised to avoid the highways, wherever possible.

Oh, yeah. Great. Now he tells me.

This is the Los Angeles Police Department.

Please vacate the premises immediately...

for your own safety.

Take me!

Can we move it along?

Dr. Katz's office.

Hello. Let me speak to Dr. Katz, please.

I'm sorry. He's not available.

Listen, for $300 an hour...

you can put me through to his house in the Hamptons.

This is the Los Angeles Police Department.

Please vacate the premises immediately...

for your own safety.

Mrs. Whitmore.

You must leave now.

First Lady secured. We're on the move.

Ah!

They're opening up!

It's so pretty.

Get the hell outta here!

Go ahead, Pilot. We're ready to take off right now.

Can you get a blanket for Patricia?

Here.

Over there?

Time's up.

Get down!

Oh, crap.

Oh, my God.

Come on, Dylan. We gotta go.

Come on, Boomer.

Boomer!

Boomer!

Reports are unclear as to the extent of the devastation...

but from all accounts...

Los Angeles, Washington, and New York have been left in ruins...

Good God!

I been saying it.

I been saying it for ten damn years.

Ain't I been saying it, Miguel?

Huh? I been saying it.

Dad, I'm sick. I don't feel good.

Pull it over, man.

We're going to be all right, Troy.

Leave me alone, man. I got it.

Miguel.

Look at all that.

We could have evacuated the cities, hours ago.

That's the advantage of being a fighter pilot.

In the Gulf War...

we knew what we had to do.

It's just... not simple, anymore.

A lot of people died, today.

How many didn't have to?

Any news on my wife yet?

The helicopter never made it to Nellis.

No radio contact.

Come on, Dylan. Stay close.

Here it is.

What happened, Mommy?

I don't know, baby.

You men will be the first wave in our counterattack.

Our target is to the north...

centered above what remains of downtown Los Angeles...

You scared, man?

No.

You?

Nope.

We will fix on our target positions...

Hold me.

Hey. Pay attention.

Something you want to add to this briefing, Captain Hiller?

No, sir. I'm just a little anxious to get up there...

and whup E.T.'s ass, that's all.

And you'll get your chance.

You'll all get your chance.

Good hunting.

Dismissed.

Let's kick the tires and light the fires, Big Daddy.

Forward Tomahawks ready to go, sir.

Let's bring it home.

Let's bring that bad boy home, Captain.

You loose?

Yes, sir.

You got your victory dance?

Well, I got it right heeere.

Yeah!

Hey, hey. Don't get premature on me, soldier.

We don't light up till the fat lady sings.

I'm all ears, brother.

You the man!

All right, gentlemen, we're on.

General, it's NORAD.

General Grey here.

Al?

All satellite, microwave, and ground communications...

with the cities, are down.

All systems go.

We believe we're looking at a total loss.

How about our boys? Where are they?

ETA to target, four minutes.

I shouldn't have left her.

Don't worry about it, big man.

I'm sure she got out of here before it happened.

Or, as the good reverend would say...

"Why we're on this particular mission, we'll never know.

But I do know, here today, that the Black Knights...

will emerge victorious, once again."

Amen, man.

Amen, Reverend.

Holy God!

Lock and load!

Roger that.

Los Angeles attack squadron...

has AMRAAM missiles locked on target.

Washington and New York squadrons reporting lock on.

Fire at will.

Knights, we are red and free.

Knight 1, Fox 3.

Knight 3, Fox 3.

Knight 7, Fox 3.

Missiles have been fired.

Are they not getting through?

No, sir. Not one.

Command, Knight 1. Command, Knight 1.

Switching to sidewinders. Moving in.

Knight 3, Love 50. Notch reference 1-2-0.

Knight 7. 1-2-0.

Knight 1. Sweet luck.

Echo, Fox 2.

Knight 7, Fox 2.

Come on, come on!

They must have some kind of protective shield...

over their hull. Knights, pull up, pull up!

Knight 3, pull up!

Controls are showing complete failure of the stats.

Pull up!

Blow through! Blow through!

There's so many of them!

They got another one, sir.

Oh, no. You did not shoot that green shit at me.

I've got you covered, Big Daddy.

Damn. They got shields, too.

Let's go, Knights. Move, Knights, move!

Jesus.

They got another one, sir. Two more just went down.

They're dropping like flies.

We're losing them.

All right. Get them out of there.

Squadron leaders, retreat to fall back positions.

Abort mission right away. Do you read me?

Do you copy?

We're going to have to make a run for this one, here.

Let's get low. Let's get fast.

I got you, Big Daddy. Let's get them.

Whoo!

Watch the deck.

Squadron leader, do you read?

This isn't happening fast enough.

Get them out of there!

What's with the monitor? Where's the picture?

We've lost the satellite.

We got two R-6, Jimmy. Shake 'em.

Roger.

Come on, come on. Move, move, move!

He's on me like white on rice, Big Daddy.

They ain't got nothing for us.

Let's push it. We've got to go, we've got to go!

I can't shake him, I can't shake him.

Yes, you can, just the way I showed you. Let's go!

Check me out, Stevie. I'm going to try something.

Don't do nothing stupid over there.

You know me.

That's what I'm talking about.

Jimmy, what are you doing? You can't bank at that speed.

Jimmy, he's closing on you!

Put your mask back on! That's an order, Marine!

I can't breathe!

Jimmy!

Jimmy, no!

That's affirmative. We have incoming.

Let me have it, son.

You got it.

Friendly?

Sergeant?

I don't think so.

Come on and get me! Come and get me!

Oh, what are you shooting at?

Where you at, baby? Come on! Come on!

Aw, you can't hit nothing!

Whoa! Low bridge!

See if you can fly that thing undercover.

Hope you got an airbag.

Whoa!

Son of a bitch.

That's right! That's right!

Get off of me! Get off of me!

That's what you get!

Look at you!

Ship all banged up!

Who's the man?

Huh? Who's the man?

Wait until I get another plane!

I'm lining all your friends up, right beside you!

Where you at, huh?

Huh? Where you at?

Welcome to Earth.

Now, that's what I call a close encounter.

Baby, stay right here.

Stay right here, with Boomer.

Keys.

Come on. Keys.

Yes!

Come on, baby. Come on.

Come on.

Yes!

Reports indicate that this battle...

has repeated itself all over the world...

with the exact same results.

See, Troy? You're feeling better already.

Everybody's packing up. They're leaving.

They said there's a spaceship headed this way.

We'd better leave, too. Don't you think?

Uhh...

It's Air Force One, for crying out loud.

Still he gets sick.

Oh, boy. I don't feel so good.

Look at me, huh? Like a rock.

Could be bad weather, could be good weather.

It doesn't matter.

We could go up. We could go down.

We can go back. We can go forward.

We can go side to side...

What'd I say?

He still gets airsick, huh?

Yeah.

Julius, with all of this, I, uh...

I didn't get a chance to thank you two.

All he could think of was getting to you.

There's still love there, I think.

Love was never a problem.

"All you need is love."

John Lennon.

Smart man.

Shot in the back. Very sad.

We've moved as many of our forces...

away from our bases as possible...

but we've already sustained heavy losses.

I spoke with the joint chiefs when they arrived at NORAD.

They agree we must launch a counter-offensive...

with a full nuclear strike.

Over American soil?

You're saying, at this point, we should sacrifice...

more innocent American civilians? Is that right?

Sir, if we don't strike soon...

there may not be much of an America left to defend.

Sir, they've taken out NORAD.

What?

It's gone, sir.

My God.

The vice president, Joint Chiefs.

Mr. President...

we must launch.

A delay now would be more costly...

than when you waited to evacuate the cities.

No, no. You're not going to launch nuclear weapons.

You're going to kill them and us, at the same time.

If we fire nukes, then everybody else is going to fire them.

You are a guest, here.

Ever hear of nuclear winter?

It's the end of life as we know it.

Do you hear what they're talking about?

Don't even think about it.

I don't have to go.

It can't be allowed.

Shut up! Captain, get him out of here!

Hey, don't tell him to shut up!

You'd all be dead now, if it wasn't for my David.

None of you did anything to prevent this.

There was nothing we could do.

We were totally unprepared for this.

Aw! Don't give me unprepared.

Come on, Julius.

It was, what... in the 1950s. You had that spaceship.

Dad.

Yeah, that thing that you found in New Mexico.

Dad, no. Not the spaceship.

Roswell. Roswell, New Mexico. Yeah.

You had the spaceship, and you had the bodies.

They were all locked up in a bunker. Where was that?

David? In Area 51, right?

Area 51.

You knew then, and you did nothing.

Sir, regardless of what you may have read in the tabloids...

there have never been any spacecraft...

recovered by our government.

Take my word for it, there is no Area 51.

There's no recovered spaceship.

Uh, excuse me, Mr. President?

That's not entirely accurate.

What? Which part?

Hold on, everybody! Hold on!

Sorry.

Can you give me a hand?

Yeah, sure.

Oh, my God.

Okay, okay, let's get this... let's get this off.

Here. Let me help you.

She's hurt pretty badly.

You know, this was supposed to be my weekend off.

But, noooo.

You got me out here dragging your heavy ass...

through the burning desert...

with your dreadlocks sticking out the back of my parachute.

You've got to come down here with an attitude...

acting all big and bad.

And what the hell is that smell?

I could've been at a barbecue!

But I ain't mad.

It's all right.

That is all right.

Hey!

You need a lift, soldier?

When I flew overhead...

I saw a base, not too far from here.

It ain't on a map.

Trust me, it's there.

Ten-hut!

Mr. President. General.

Welcome to Area 51.

Please follow me.

We're now twenty-four floors beneath the surface...

and here's our main research facility.

Let's see it.

I'm sorry, sir. It's a clean room.

We have to keep it static-free. If we'll all go to decontamination...

Open the door.

Yes, sir.

My God. Why the hell wasn't I told about this place?

Two words, Mr. President:

plausible deniability.

I don't understand.

Where does all this come from?

How do you get funding for something like this?

You don't actually think they spend $20,000 on a hammer...

$30,000 on a toilet seat, do you?

Mr. President, this is Dr. Okun.

He's been heading up the research department...

on this project, for the last fifteen years.

How do you do?

Mr. President.

Wow.

This... What a pleasure.

As you can imagine, they...

they don't let us out much.

I can understand that.

Well, I guess you'd like to see the big tamale, huh?

Follow me.

She's a beaut, ain't she?

As you can see from the repairs...

we've been trying to put her back together

since the late 1960s.

Don't tell me you've had this for forty years...

and you don't know anything about them.

Oh, hell, no. No, no.

We know tons about them.

But the neatest stuff...

the neatest stuff has only happened in the last few days.

See, we can't duplicate their type of power...

so we've never been able to experiment.

But since these guys started showing up...

all the little gizmos inside turned on.

The last twenty-four hours have been really exciting.

Exciting? People are dying out there.

I don't think "exciting" is the word I'd choose to describe it.

You guys are hoping to fly this thing, huh?

You said you can repair their technology.

Can you tell us anything useful about them?

Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, I mean, they're not all that dissimilar from us.

Breathes oxygen.

Comparable tolerances to heat, cold.

Probably why they're interested in our planet.

Hey.

You guys want to see them?

Hmm?

Uh, this is... this is "the Vault."

Or, as some of us have come to call it...

"the Freak Show."

The...

When we found them...

they were wearing some sort of bio-mechanical suits.

But once we got them off...

we learned a great deal about their anatomy.

Eyes, ears, no vocal chords.

We're assuming they communicate with each other...

through some other means.

You're obviously not thinking about...

hand signals and body language.

It's some kind of extra-sensory perception.

Telepathy.

So...

it's an organic life form.

Can they be killed?

Their bodies are just as frail as ours.

These two died in the crash.

This one, a few weeks later.

You just...

you have to get through their technology...

which is, I'm sorry to say...

far more advanced.

David, you unlocked part of that technology.

You cracked the code.

Oh, no, no.

All I did was stumble onto their... signal.

I don't know how helpful I can be.

Why don't you show them what you've discovered so far...

figure out what they haven't thought of yet...

and we'll see if you're as smart as we all hope you are.

What code?

Captain Steven Hiller, United States Marine Corps.

I'm sorry, Captain. This is a restricted area.

I can't let you pass without clearance.

Okay. Come here.

You want to see my clearance?

Maybe I'll just leave this here, with you.

Let them pass.

Get the hell out of the way.

Did you see that?

Oh, boy.

How long has he been unconscious?

About three hours.

Let's get him into containment, stat.

As the former head of the C.I.A...

you knew about this place.

When were you planning on informing the rest of us?

It had been deemed classified.

You should have told us about this when they first arrived.

You should have warned us before we launched a counter-attack...

that cost us the lives of hundreds of American pilots!

There was no way we could have known that our fighters...

would have been that ineffective against their attackers.

Mr. President.

The little bit of information that we have...

comes directly into this room, Mr. President.

Atlanta, Chicago, and Philadelphia...

destroyed.

We've learned that NATO and Western Allied installations...

were the first to be taken out.

Then we were hit.

They knew exactly where and how to hit us.

And our forces?

We're down to 15%.

If you calculate the time it takes...

to destroy a city and move on...

we're looking at the worldwide destruction

of every major city...

in the next 36 hours.

We're being exterminated.

Mr. President.

This is Captain Steven Hiller.

Captain.

Mr. President.

Well done.

Where is it now?

We have it isolated down in the containment lab, sir.

I'd like to go see it.

General, I'm really anxious to get back to El Toro.

Hasn't anyone told you?

El Toro has been completely destroyed.

Oh, no.

We were lucky.

Today was the first time I used the subway.

Thank God for the Metro Rail.

These should last us awhile.

Don't move. I'll get it for you.

Stay still.

He's your son?

He's my angel.

Was his father stationed here?

Nah, he, uh...

he wasn't his father.

But I was kind of hoping he wanted the job, though.

So, what do you do for a living?

I'm a dancer. Ah.

Ballet?

No.

Exotic.

Oh!

Sorry.

Don't be.

I'm not.

It's good money.

Besides...

my baby's worth it.

Dylan.

Come here.

I want you to meet the First Lady.

Ohh.

Hello.

Hi.

I didn't know that you'd recognized me.

Well, I didn't want to say nothing.

I voted for the other guy.

All right, life support monitors recording.

So, if we screw up, it's all on tape.

Okay, come on, come on. Let's get this biomechanical suit off him.

Put the spreader, right here.

Right along the ridge.

Microprobe thingamajig goes right here...

pick there. Good.

All right, now spread it very, very gently.

Let me get in.

Uh-huh.

Gentle, gentle. That's it.

That's right... easy.

All right. Okay.

Let's proceed.

Now comes the, uh...

the really icky part.

Ugh.

Oh, boy.

This is one smelly...

disgusting...

Oh, look at it.

It doesn't look alive, does it?

The arm is moving.

Doctor!

Doctor, doctor!

Get it off!

Don't move, don't move!

Help me, help me!

Open up that door!

My God!

Dr. Okun?

Release me.

Open the door. Get him out of there.

No, wait.

Release me...

now!

I know there is much we can learn from each other...

if we can negotiate a truce.

We can find a way to coexist.

Can there be a peace between us?

Peace?

No peace.

What is it you want us to do?

Die.

Die...

Mr. President?

Is that glass bulletproof?

No, sir.

Are you all right?

I saw his thoughts.

I saw what they're planning to do.

They're like locusts.

They're moving from planet to planet...

their whole civilization.

After they've consumed every natural resource, they move on.

And we're next.

Nuke 'em.

Let's nuke the bastards.

Just my luck. No ice.

I take it you've heard.

Hey, a toast.

To the end of the world.

He didn't come to this decision lightly.

He didn't have any other choice.

Yeah.

You still believe in him.

Yeah. Well, he's a good man.

Whoa...

He better be.

You left me for him.

Or, you know, for your... career.

You know, it wasn't just my... career.

It was the biggest opportunity of my life.

I wanted my life to make a difference.

I wanted my life to mean something.

Yeah, and, um, hmm...

I wasn't, um... ambitious enough for you?

David, you could have done anything that you wanted.

Research...

development...

Oh, honey, I was happy where I was.

Haven't you ever wanted to be part of something special?

I was part of something special.

Well, if it makes any difference...

I never stopped loving you.

But that wasn't enough, was it?

Let's pick it up, man.

We're on a tight schedule, now. Let's go!

Let's pick it up, man.

We're working on a tight schedule. Let's go!

Pick it up, man! Pick it up!

What the hell are you doing? Get out of there!

Look, I got something I got to handle. I'm just borrowing it.

No, you're not, sir.

Do you really want to shoot me?

Just tell them I hit you.

Command, this is Retel Op.

The squadron is in the air.

We are on station and awaiting instructions.

Roger. Break formation, head to targets.

Sir...

they're breaking formation.

Mr. President, we're initiating sequence code.

Verification, Alpha Zulu 6-8-9.

Which city will be reached first?

Houston, Texas.

ETA six minutes and counting down.

Houston.

The major cities have been deserted.

Civilian casualties should be down to a minimum.

Command, this is Neighborhood Watch.

We are in position.

Tracking monitors are locked on.

We are going to visual recon.

Roger that, TC (inaudible).

They have confirmation.

Launch code confirmed.

Alpha Zulu 6-8-9.

Standing by.

Laser targeting.

Locked on.

We're locked on, sir.

Do you wish to deploy?

Mr. President, if you wish to deploy, the time is now.

Mr. President.

Deploy.

That's a go. Alpha Zulu 6-8-9er, that is a go.

Here we go.

Bird's away.

We have visual confirmation of the missile.

It's on target...

Approaching...

May our children forgive us.

Five seconds to impact.

Three...

two...

one...

Oh, yeah, it's a hit!

Let's go!

Let's fuckin' go!

Can I confirm that the target was destroyed?

Get the tank commander on the line.

I want confirmation that the target was destroyed.

Yes, sir. Red Arrow Alpha 9 7-2-3, can you read?

Repeat, Commander, you're breaking up.

We have lost visual.

Roger that. We're looking for confirmation.

We got the bastards.

Yeah! Good job, everyone. Congratulations.

Commander, do you have visual?

I repeat, we need visual confirmation.

Has the target been destroyed?

Negative.

Target remains.

I repeat...

target remains.

Call the other planes back.

One of the bombers might have more luck.

We shouldn't just give up on this!

I said, call them back.

Abort.

All right, abort mission.

Issue the abort codes right away. This is an abort. Full abort.

Do you read? Abort mission right away.

Jasmine?

Yes. Yes!

You're late.

Well, you know I like to make an entrance.

Right this way.

Where are we going?

Right through there, sir.

Mr. President...

Your wife is resting comfortably at the moment.

Great.

Perhaps if we had gotten to her earlier...

Hey, there she is. Go on.

She doesn't look too good.

Your wife is bleeding internally, Mr. President.

Perhaps if we'd gotten to her earlier...

Hey, wait a minute. What are you saying?

We can't stop the bleeding.

If we'd...

There's nothing we can do for her.

We were worried.

We didn't know where you were.

I didn't know where I was, either.

You got bigger, I think.

I did?

Mm-hmm.

Just keep growing and growing.

I can't.

Hey.

Can you, uh, wait outside for a little bit...

so Mom can get a rest?

Hey. Come on, Munchkin.

I'm so sorry that I didn't come home...

when you asked me to.

Ohh...

It's okay.

The doctors...

think that you're...

gonna be just fine.

Liar.

Is Mommy sleeping now?

Yeah...

Mommy's sleeping.

Hey.

David!

What the hell are you doing?

I'm making a mess!

Yeah, this I can see.

We gotta burn the rain forest, dump toxic waste...

pollute the air, and rip up the ozone...

'cause maybe if we screw this planet up enough...

they won't want it anymore.

Wait, wait, wait. David, David!

Don't do this to yourself. Listen to me.

Are you listening to me?

Everyone loses faith at some point in their life.

David, look at myself.

I haven't spoken to God since your mother died.

Yes.

But see, sometimes...

we have to remember what we still have.

Like what?

Well...

you still have your health.

Come on, David, David. You need your rest.

Come on. Get off this freezing concrete floor...

before you catch a cold. Come on.

What did you just say?

You mean, about faith?

Well, you see, a man can live his entire life...

After that. The other part.

What? What?

I don't want you to catch cold.

Doh!

What is that? What's the matter with you?

Genius.

Genius?

My dad... a total genius.

Jim, wake up.

We got work to do. Get everybody down here, right away.

What?

Look at that.

Wow! Does that thing really fly in outer space?

It most certainly does.

Sure doesn't look like it.

Hey, they're here.

All right, Connie, what's this all about?

I have no idea.

Get everybody off of it.

All right, everybody, clear the platform.

Let's go. Come on, come on.

Major Mitchell...

do you have a pistol?

What? You got a gun?

Sergeant, your sidearm.

See that, uh, Coke can...

on top of the alien craft?

Think you can shoot that thing off?

Do it. Shoot it.

Sir?

Go ahead.

What the hell are you doing?

I'm sorry. My fault.

My fault.

That Coke can was protected by the craft's shield...

and we can't penetrate their defenses.

We know that, already. What's your point?

Right. My point is, if we can't beat their defenses...

then we gotta get around them.

Major, one more time. Anytime.

How did you do that?

I gave it a cold.

I gave it a virus.

A computer virus.

Are you telling us you can send out a signal...

that will disable all their shields?

That's right. Just like they used our satellites against us...

we can use their own signal against them.

If we plant a virus into that mother ship...

it's gonna then filter down...

into all the corresponding ships, below.

I... I'm sorry. I don't understand.

Just how, exactly, do we infect the mother ship...

with this virus?

Well...

we're going to, uh...

have to, um, ahem...

fly their alien craft out of our atmosphere, and dock with it.

We can enter here, as shown in these satellite photos.

We then upload the virus.

We then set off some kind of explosion...

which will disable it...

and that'll disorient the smaller ships below...

and that could buy, I think, at least some time...

to, uh...

to take 'em...

take 'em out. Take 'em down.

Do your...

do your stuff.

This is ridiculous!

How long would their shields be down?

Uh...

uh, I don't know. A matter of minutes?

You want us to coordinate a massive worldwide counterstrike...

with a window of only a few minutes?

With the shields down, that might be possible.

Oh, please.

We don't have the manpower or the resources...

to launch that kind of a campaign.

Not to mention that this whole cockamamie plan...

is dependent on a machine...

that no one in this world is qualified to operate.

I wouldn't say that, sir.

I've seen these things in action...

and I'm well aware of their maneuvering capabilities.

With your permission, General, I'd like the opportunity to try.

That thing is a wreck.

Crash-landed back in the '50s.

We don't even know if it's capable of flying.

Jim, uh, remove the clamps.

Any questions?

Let's do it.

Alright, you heard the President.

Let's get this thing prepped...

and ready to fly! Good luck, Pilot.

Thank you, Mr. President.

A virus, huh?

Your idea.

That's right.

You really think you can fly that thing?

You really think you can do all that bullshit you just said?

Hoo.

I understand you are upset over the death of your wife...

but that's no excuse for making another fatal mistake.

The only mistake I ever made...

was to appoint a sniveling little weasel like you...

as Secretary of Defense. I don't think you understand...

However, that is one mistake I'm thankful to say...

that I don't have to live with.

Mr. President...

Mr. Nimziki... you're fired.

Let's organize every plane we can find...

and get us some goddamn pilots to fly 'em.

Yes, sir.

He can't do that.

Well, he just, uh...

did.

Command has attempted to compile a list of casualties and losses...

but information is sketchy, at best.

Well, we know we've lost the Belgian contingent in the Sinai.

There's a strong possibility there may be more reinforcements...

in hiding in the Golan Strait.

What the hell's he saying?

It seems they're getting a signal. Old Morse code.

It's from the Americans.

They want to organize a counter-offensive.

It's about bloody time.

What do they plan to do?

We have confirmed reports of combat-ready divisions...

in Europe, the Middle East, and Asia.

That's impressive...

considering it's all being done with, uh...

Morse code.

Are our forces here?

We have sufficient aircraft for the battle plan, but...

But what, General?

Pilots are coming up short.

Well, then find 'em.

Ham radio operators from New York to Japan...

trade rumors of military forces in hiding...

unwilling to reveal themselves for fear of annihilation...

What we're planning at this time is to launch a counter-offensive.

However, with our depleted manpower...

we're asking that anyone with any flight experience come forward.

Military training is preferable...

but anyone who can fly a plane would be useful.

I can fly.

I'm a pilot.

All right, guys, listen up.

All right, pay close attention.

These F-18s are very different...

than the jets you've piloted before.

It's kind of strong.

You'll have to forgive the expression...

but you're about to get a crash course in modern avionics.

Ugh! Keep it coming. Keep it... keep it coming.

Okay. You got it.

All right, listen up. Before we can begin...

we're going to have to get...

a little background information on your flight experience.

Uh, let's start with you.

Who, me?

Uh...

well, I'm, uh, ahem, Russell Casse, sir.

Um... and, uh, after 'Nam, I, uh, got into crop dusting...

and, uh, been doing that ever since.

Oh, and on a, uh, personal note, sir...

I'd just like to add that, uh...

ever since I was kidnapped by aliens, ten years ago...

I've been dying for some payback...

and I just want you to know that, uh...

I won't let you down.

You have one tactical nuclear missile...

we're loading into this launcher...

we're installing under the right wing.

This is the firing mechanism...

to be attached to the ship's main console.

Just like the AMRAAM launch pad on a Stealth.

Except the nuke will not detonate at impact.

You'll have thirty seconds to get your asses out of there.

Good luck, gentlemen.

Thirty seconds.

Tell me, tell me.

It was the strongest radio transmitter we could get.

It'll tell us when you've uploaded the virus.

Thirty seconds.

Don't you think that's cutting it a little too close?

Oh, we're gonna be well on our way back home...

before we shoot that thing off.

Why you?

David!

I don't... excuse me.

I don't understand why you can't show someone else...

how to plant the virus, someone who is trained...

No, no. Something may go wrong.

I may have to think quickly, adjust the signal.

Who knows?

Hey, you know how I'm, like, always trying to save the planet?

Here's my chance.

Now he gets ambitious.

It's too tight.

Well, I had to borrow it. Let me see.

Okay. Oh, I guess that's good enough.

So, how do I look?

Oh, thank you. You're a lot of help.

You're late.

Well, you know me. I know.

You like to make a big entrance.

Let me help you. Um, listen.

Before we do this, I just want to say I'm sorry.

Sorry for what, babe?

I should have done this a long time ago.

Do you have the ring?

Uh, yes, sir.

Here. Make yourself useful.

Ow.

Witnesses?

Uh... Um...

Sorry. We got hung up. Uh-oh.

Well, let's get this show on the road.

Dearly beloved, we're gathered here in the sight of God...

and in the presence of these witnesses...

to join this man and this woman in holy matrimony.

Any person who can show good cause...

why these two should not wed...

please speak now, or forever hold your peace.

Steve, will you take this woman to be your wedded wife...

to live together with her in the holy state of matrimony?

Will you love her, comfort her...

honor and keep her, in sickness and in health?

And, forsaking all others, keep yourself only for her...

as long as you both shall live?

I will.

Whew.

Good morning.

They're a little young.

That they are.

They look a little nervous.

I'm gonna need all flight crews...

to report to their designated areas immediately.

Major, can I borrow that?

Sir.

Good morning.

Good morning.

In less than an hour...

aircraft from here will join others from around the world...

and you will be launching the largest aerial battle...

in the history of mankind.

Mankind. That word should have new meaning for all of us today.

We can't be consumed by our petty differences anymore.

We will be united in our common interests.

Perhaps it's fate that today is the 4th of July...

and you will once again be fighting for our freedom...

not from tyranny, oppression, or persecution...

but from annihilation.

We are fighting for our right to live.

To exist.

And should we win the day...

the 4th of July will no longer be known as an American holiday...

but as the day when the world declared in one voice...

we will not go quietly into the night!

We will not vanish without a fight!

We're going to live on!

We're going to survive!

Today we celebrate our Independence Day!

Let's go!

Mr. President, right this way, sir.

We got your gear, over here.

I've got a jumpsuit for you.

The rest of your gear's squared away in this duffel.

You got your choice of helmets.

Mr. President, I'd sure like to know what you're doing.

I'm a combat pilot, Will.

I belong in the air.

Okay, sir. Let's get you airborne. Right over here.

You know, as soon as I get back...

we're gonna light those fireworks, right?

Here.

Take these.

Just in case.

Where's... where's, um...

Just in case.

I'm very proud of you.

So be careful, okay?

It's time.

I love you.

Oh, damn!

Wait a minute, wait a minute. Wait, wait.

We got to find some cigars.

Here, here!

Take these.

My last two.

You are a lifesaver.

Almost put a hex on the whole damn thing.

Missile Launch.

Oh, crap!

What... what did I hit?

I picked a hell of a day to quit drinking.

This is our victory dance.

Not until the fat lady sings.

Oh! Yes, okay.

This is important.

Mm. Fat lady.

I gotcha.

Open launch tunnel.

Shaky, huh?

Is it gonna do this the whole way?

Just make sure your seat backs and tray tables...

are in their upright and locked position.

Yeah... is it?

Let's rock 'n' roll.

Oh!

Oops.

Oops? What does that mean?

What do you mean...

Nah, I... I got it. Some jerk didn't put the...

I know what I mean when I say it.

What do you mean saying "oops," there?

What do you say we try that one again, huh?

Yes, yes.

Yes, without the "oops."

There's the... that a-way.

Oof! Ooh...

Whaa... hoo! Aah... oh!

I've got to get me one of these!

No, no, no. What was that, what was that? Don't do that.

Just trying to get a feel for the old girl, that's all.

Oh, no... no, don't. Leave her alone.

Look! No hands.

Steve!

You're all secured, sir.

Grey, do you read me?

Roger, Eagle One.

Your primary target has shifted course.

Which way are they headed?

I think our secret's out. They're headed straight for us.

ETA, twenty-six minutes.

Still with me over there?

What the hell was I thinking?

I've been waiting for this my whole life.

Head straight for it.

What the hell...

Don't touch them! No, no, don't!

I was counting on this.

They are bringing us in.

When the hell was you gonna tell me?

Oops.

We're gonna have to work on our communication.

We have visual.

Do not engage until we've confirmed...

the package has been delivered.

Roger.

Major, what happens if... if that thing gets here...

before the virus is planted?

Well, ma'am, this facility's buried deep within the mountain.

It should provide us some protection.

Great. What about the people outside?

Lieutenant Sayle, we got incoming.

Oh, my God.

Look at that.

There must be thousands of them, millions of them.

What the hell are they doing?

Looks like they're preparing an invasion.

Hey, I don't like this. This is stupid. They can see us!

Oh, no, no, no. This thing comes fully loaded.

AM-FM radio, reclining bucket seats, and...

power windows.

Come on, babe.

Come on, baby.

We're in.

Oh.

Oh, do it. Do it.

Do it.

Sir, he's uploading the virus.

Eagle One, the package is being delivered.

Stand by to engage.

Roger. Eagle 1. Check left.

Hey, listen up.

We have an emergency situation.

We need everyone to grab everything they can.

Only what you can carry.

We need to get you inside, immediately.

The virus is in.

All we can do now is... pray.

Delivery complete. Engage.

Delivery complete. It's a go, it's a go.

Eagle 1, Fox 3.

Gentlemen, this is it.

Come on, come on, come on.

God...

Virus ineffective. Disengage.

Get your people out of there.

Disengage. Rear flank, follow suit.

Hold on, Command.

I want another shot at it.

Sir, I strongly recommend you disengage.

Eagle 1...

Fox 3!

Direct hit!

Squadron leaders, fire at will, fire at will...

fire at will!

We're going in! Squadron leaders, take point.

Eagle 6, at 7. Eagle 5, at 3.

Eagle 1...

Fox 2!

Eagle 20, Fox 2!

Evasive maneuvers! Squadron leaders, evasive maneuvers!

Prepare to engage!

All right, Mr. President, here we go!

All right, baby, I've got you.

Payback's a bitch, ain't it?

Okay, job's done. Let's go home.

Gladly.

What's up?

We're stuck.

What?

It's not responding. It's stuck.

Then try again.

Come on, come on!

Steve, Steve?

Hey, what the hell are you doing?

It's not me. They're overriding the system.

Oh... shit!

Um...

hide.

Everybody hold someone's hand.

Hold hands!

Come on in.

I'm not Jewish.

Nobody's perfect.

Are you scared?

Me too.

Eagle 7, Fox 2.

Eagle 3, Fox 2.

They're running out of missiles, sir.

We're just not causing enough damage.

It's settling directly over us.

They're preparing to fire their primary weapon!

Then let's take it out, before it takes us out.

Targeted, 12 o'clock.

My God, they're everywhere.

Bandits on our tail! They're locked on!

I see 'em!

All right, squadron leaders, I want weapons check.

You're outta time! You've gotta disable it, now!

I'm in range. Locking on.

I've got tone. Eagle 1, Fox 2!

That is a negative impact.

That is an "N.I." Negative impact.

I'm out of missiles. Eagle 2!

I'm on it.

Oh! Oh! Jesus!

Sir, all missiles have been fired.

You're out of time! Get your ass out of there!

We're not done, yet!

Get as far away as you can!

Doesn't anyone have any missiles left?

Sorry I'm late, Mr. President!

Kinda got hung up, back there.

Pilot, you armed?

Armed and ready, sir.

I am packin'.

Who is that guy?

Put him on speaker.

Pilot, identify yourself.

It's me. Russell Casse, sir.

I told you I wouldn't let you down.

Just keep those guys off me for a few more seconds, will ya?

Okay. Echo-9, Echo-7.

Take flanking positions.

I want you to look after this guy, okay?

All right, boys, let's give Mr. Casse some cover.

Gentlemen... let's plow the road!

We'll draw 'em off, and it'll be all yours!

Whoa-hoo! Look out! Comin' through!

I've got tone.

Eagle 20. Fox 2!

Eagle 20. Fox 2!

It's jammed!

It won't fire.

Damn it!

Do me a favor.

Tell my children...

I love them very much.

All right, you alien assholes!

In the words of my generation...

up yours!

Dad! What's he doing?

Come on, baby!

Come on, baby, come on!

Good luck, buddy.

Hello, boys!

I'm back!

He did it!

The son of a bitch did it!

All right!

What your father did was very brave.

You should be proud of him.

I am.

Now we know how to take them out, General.

Spread the word.

Get on the wire to every squadron around the world.

Tell 'em how to bring those sons-of-bitches down.

What do you think?

Checkmate.

Wow, it's funny...

I always thought, that things like these would kill me.

Thank you.

It's been a pleasure.

Steve, you too.

Only one thing left to do.

Ready?

Yes, sir.

Hey! All right!

Hey, hey! Look at us!

Take a look at the Earthlings.

Good-bye!

Y'all take care, all right?

Nothin' but love for ya. Bye!

Nothin' but love for ya.

Do you think they have any clue...

what's about to happen to 'em?

Oh, not a chance in hell. Good night.

Peace!

Ohh!

We're loose.

Can you get us out of here in thirty seconds?

I ain't heard no fat lady!

Forget the fat lady. You're obsessed with the fat lady.

Drive us outta here.

Ohh! They're chasing us.

Oh, really? You think?

Oh, that was a hit. I took a hit.

We're not hit! We're not hit! Stop side-seat driving.

Left, left. Tunnel, tunnel. Exit, exit, left!

Where the hell do you think I'm going?

Okay, we're... we're... we're, uh...

Uh-oh, they're closing up on us. Is that closing?

Shut up, shut up, shut up!

Must go faster, must go faster, must go faster.

Go, go, go, go, go!

Elvis has left the building!

Thank you very much.

Ohh! I love you, man.

They're going down all over the world, Tom.

We got 'em beat.

How about our two delivery boys?

Any word from them?

We lost contact with Captain Hiller and Levinson...

nearly twenty minutes ago.

Hold it!

Hold on, sir.

I've got something on radar.

Sorry, sir.

Good job.

Thank you.

Well done, Captain.

Yes, sir. Thank you, sir.

David...

not bad.

Thank you, Mr. President.

Not too bad at all.

Oh, so this is healthy?

Oh? I could get used to it.

Happy 4th of July, Daddy.

Same to you, Munchkin.

Didn't I promise you fireworks?

Yeah.