Original subtitles

Maybe I'll sell a piece of the enterprise, and maybe I won't.

You want to make a deal, or don't you?

Oh, maybe. Well, maybe about it. The way I heard it, you got no choice.

You heard wrong.

You don't need cash? Can always use a little more means.

I have a plan on multiplying this thousand dollars tenfold.

How?

How?

Oh, Captain!

Captain, hold him! Ray!

You want to make a deal or don't you? Try me again.

When?

Tomorrow morning.

Good evening, ladies.

Your luck depends on mine. Marcella.

Off we go, driver.

Table of Stakes!

You tilt that in the bottom.

Well, as I said, my luck is your luck.

Well, you're lucky, because now I need a partner.

Everybody on the river knows you've been trying to get a hold of the Enterprise.

And right, you are, too. Now, this boat's going to do you proud.

Why, there's more miles in her for a pound of steam than any boat you've ever piled.

So I got into a little financial difficulties. Now,

have I ever tried to hide or deny it?

Like I said, my bad luck's your good luck.

Your 10,000 cash investment will bring you 10% ownership.

Your timing's perfect.

You know about the gold rush in California? Well, shipping's got to boom.

And with old Zack Taylor going into the White House, well,

a dollar's got to be worth a dollar again.

Your 10,000 cash will bring you 10% ownership, plus 10%...

He who services as a master pilot, why, that's 20% of the gold money.

Josh!

Yee-haw!

You can't get away with that. All right, you men. That ought to do it.

Wait just a minute here. Who do you think you are? That's who I am.

And when you dry off, read this.

No, no, no, wait a minute. Be reasonable. I'll let the boat work.

I promise you I'll pay off my predators.

Just give me a chance, will you?

I'll pay off my debts, I tell you. Red, you keep your eye on that.

Anybody comes fussing around, you know what to do.

The least you can do is give me a little time.

You got 24 hours worth. 24 hours? I'm auctioning

off in the morning. What's the hurry?

I'm leaving town tomorrow afternoon.

Look, Sheriff, you can't find buyers on such short notice. I only need one.

Captain Morgan's boat docks tonight.

What do you expect to do?

Have old Blundahead Morgan buy the Enterprise and raise little river boats?

He can't even handle what he's got.

We figure that with another man aboard the Enterprise,

we could make her a paying proposition.

Oh, we do. That's right.

You might say that Captain Morgan and I are more than just friends.

More than just friends.

Man can't be closer than to raise another man's son for him.

Young Morgan's been apprenticed to me since the captain was with it.

You might say it's a pity to let a good thing out of the family.

You might.

What are you gonna do about it?

It's legal.

Alright, it's a deal.

50% ownership in the enterprise.

And a non-cancellable contract as our master pack.

All right, all right.

Plus the full authority of captain when you're not on board.

Sure, sure.

You agree to make every effort to promote cargo

and passengers take all the responsibility.

Sure, I'll even wear another plate of bagpipes and wear kilts.

Pipe them on board if I have to. Well, it looks

like we're in full agreement then, Captain.

Amongst gentlemen, a handshake is sufficient.

The contract is made.

All right, all right, now let's have the $10,000 so I can get us back in business.

On second thought, partner,

I don't think it's too good an idea for you to handle our money.

Oh, you don't?

You go see the sheriff. You make the deal and bring back a paper.

Then I'll give him the money.

Oh, you will?

Well, you stay right here, because when I come back, if you're not here,

the deal is off. Handshake or no handshake.

Well, of course I'll be here. I'm the captain.

In your absence. Remember?

The sheriff's at a meeting.

If you belonged here in Baton Rouge, you sure wouldn't

be asking questions. You'd have known.

Yeah, well, I don't belong here in Baton Rouge. Now,

do you mind if I ask you a few more questions? Well, not at all.

You're talking to the right man.

I'm in charge when the sheriff is in the field.

What time will you be back from this meeting?

Is it important? You can't handle it for him.

I don't know.

Well, now.

You know, the moment I laid eyes on you, I said to myself, I said, now there,

there is a man who knows everything.

Did anybody ever tell you you look like Captain Morgan?

I mean, the Captain Morgan of the Riverboat Tennessee?

Should.

He's my father.

No. Yep.

Well, now, I knew you had River Man's blood in you from the first moment I saw you.

Now, what about this meeting?

Depends. On what?

When they get around to voting. I see. What's your guess?

It's a cinch.

Sheriff Stone will get it. He will?

Get what?

I forgot.

You don't know nothing. Yeah, that's right.

You see, the sheriff is a very important man.

He did such a good job helping elect old Zack Taylor to be president.

That we get to send a man up river with him to the presidential inauguration.

Oh, I see.

And the sheriff is it, huh? Right.

And if you're smart, you'll play along with him.

You don't think he's settling for being sheriff?

No, I suspected he had big plans. Governor.

Governor? Yep.

And sure as you're standing there, he's gone all the way.

Well, a real baby-kissing politician.

Nothing wrong with that, is there? Oh, no, no, no.

A smart man knows what to do with these tools. Where's the meeting?

Imperial Hotel. Imperial Hotel.

What can I do for you, sir?

Ma'am, what would you like to do?

My name's Lucy Bale.

I'm the new hostess at the hotel.

Hostess.

Well, I spell the manager when he's away from the desk,

and right now he's away from the desk.

I see.

I mostly run the dining room.

Oh, ma'am, you just got yourself a new customer.

Oh, a nice Mr. Holden, ma'am.

Gray Holden.

What can I do for you, Mr. Holden?

Well, ma'am, right now I have to see a man in there in that luncheon meeting.

Oh, well, I'm awful afraid you're going to have to wait a few minutes.

They don't want to be interrupted.

But now we have a nice bar right over there with a view.

Ma'am, I like the view right here.

Say, I'll bet you work on the river.

I'm Captain of the Enterprise, ma'am.

Captain?

Oh, gracious me.

You know, I've always wanted to work on a riverboat, to go places and see things.

Oh, I think it must be the most exciting life.

But I'd just do anything to go on one.

You would? Gentlemen!

We have narrowed the voting down to Mortician Pierce and me. Now,

before we take the final vote, I have only this to say.

I'd like to look after your interests while you're alive,

but you'll get no argument from me.

That mortician Pierce is the one to look after

you when you're dead. Shall we vote, eh?

Well, now, maybe a woman running the kitchen is just what your boat needs.

Yeah, we call it a galley.

A galley?

Well, now, isn't that charming?

One moment more, gentlemen, one more moment,

and Castor Byram will give us the results.

Mortician Billingford Pierce. Congratulations.

You mean you'd give up all of this just to come aboard a riverboat?

Well, now, if it was the right riverboat,

Yeah, well, I'll keep everything you said in mind.

I don't know what you're talking about. I have no problem.

No, I mean the lien against the Enterprise.

You don't have to auction her off tomorrow.

No, I don't.

No, no, of course not. I got $10,000. That'll satisfy your creditors. It will?

Yes, of course it will.

If you'll pardon me, I... You want to auction off my boat, don't you?

You and Morgan.

Yeah, now get out of my way.

You think that 10 bad years gives you all kinds of rights, don't you, huh?

You weren't chosen to go to the inauguration, huh?

They had no right to do that to me.

No, no, they sure didn't.

Huh?

I know just how you feel.

You do?

Yeah, when a man has lost something he's always wanted and counted on, it's painful.

That's right.

How do you know that?

We're all brothers under the skin.

Let's go into the bar.

For what? Well, I'd like to buy you a drink.

You wouldn't be trying to bribe me, would you? Me?

Bribe a man like you, Sheriff? Oh, no.

No, I just thought a man of your experience

could give me a little advice, that's all.

Like what?

Well, about how never again to get myself and my boat into the

embarrassing financial situation that she's in right now.

Well, that's obvious.

You put too much of a load on your credit with wine, women.

And gambling.

Next time, don't be so big-hearted.

Yes, yes, you're absolutely right, Sheriff. Yes, we both have the same problems.

Trusting people.

Never again.

Well... Well, now I know how to make a riverboat pay off.

Next time.

How? To make it the most famous boat in the river.

Make it so that people will stand in line just to come aboard.

Yo, I've got ideas.

That's not enough.

No?

No, you need connections. Connections?

The right political connections.

Now, if the word got around...

But the president used your vote.

Then I can see how it could mean some real business for you.

Sheriff, can I take you into my confidence?

Serving the public is not only a duty, sir, it's an honor.

What's the secret?

Well, sir, My boat is taking the president up to the inauguration.

That's right.

I promised I wouldn't tell anybody, but since you've

been leveling with me... Well, I have, haven't I?

You see, that's why I gotta get my boat back out in the river.

How'd you ever let yourself get into such trouble with a contract like that?

Why didn't you tell somebody? I gave my word, sir.

I gave my word.

I'd rather lose the Enterprise and trespass on their confidence.

Of course, I don't imagine the president would be

too unhappy about going upriver on another boat.

But I imagine that heads will roll when he finds out that it isn't the Enterprise.

I'm going to release the enterprise from impound.

No. As soon as you deliver me that $10,000, you tell me you have to pay on account.

Thank you, sir.

You see, the sheriff gets anything he wants.

Well, if there's anything else I can do for you, why don't hesitate to ask?

Everything's just fine, Captain. Thank you.

Get off my bunk. You think you can march yourself in here and take over my quarters?

Now, don't go getting excited. I just wanted to see how the other half lived.

Besides, if you get too ornery,

I'll wait a few hours and buy the Enterprise at the sheriff's auction.

The boat's not going to be auctioned.

You made a deal? Well, of course I made a deal. You think I wouldn't?

How'd you do it? Never mind how I did it. I did it.

Now let's get that money up so I can set the deal.

Where's the paper? Paper? What paper? The man's a sheriff.

He's a public servant. Don't you trust him? No. I'll go with you.

No. Don't you trust me?

Look, I'll go get a release. Then there won't be any misunderstanding. No.

Look, you're the one who's the trouble. Just leave it to your partner, will you?

I'll take care of everything.

Yeah, that's what I'm afraid of.

Oh, Sheriff Stone, I'd like you to meet my pilot, Mr. Blake.

Sir, Captain Holden should have mentioned we're partners in the Enterprise.

Partners? Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh, well, in that case, I'll need your signature on this document here. Here.

Well, you just sign right there and make it all legal. Thank you.

There.

That's the way I like to do business.

I'm Lucy Bell.

I've been trying to talk you over. Partnering to take me on the Enterprise.

Well, I'm sure we can accommodate you, ma'am.

Well, I just can't go, you understand? I mean, I'm just a little old working gal.

You'd have to find a job for me to do.

A job?

What could you possibly do on a riverboat, hmm?

Well, I'm awfully good in the kitchen.

I bet you are, huh?

Wait, wait, wait, just a minute now here.

Who said anything about your getting free passage

and transportation aboard the Enterprise?

I did.

You're taking undue advantage now just because you've got

a beat in your butt about going on this particular trip.

What's so special about this trip?

I made up my mind.

If I don't go, neither does the Enterprise.

Well, then I guess you go if that's what you want.

That's the way I want it.

Yeah.

When do we pick up the president?

What president?

Well, I had to tell him. I'll explain later.

Explain what?

Well, for security reasons, of course.

Nobody knows where the president's going to board or what time.

Oh, I can understand that.

I can't.

I'll get an official communique tonight. I'll let you know when, where.

How?

Well, since the captain will be on board,

I consider it a real privilege to inform the sheriff of our departure time.

Is she gone?

I guess she is now.

That's good showmanship.

From what I hear about old Zack, he'll appreciate it.

Woman's touch.

Yeah. Now how about the key to the padlock of the Enterprise?

And don't forget a letter to that watchdog of yours, that Red.

I'll take care of those details.

I'll take care of all those things when the time comes.

Rest assured, the Enterprise will be unchained.

Well, what do you say about having a drink to celebrate?

That's a good idea. Hey, what are we celebrating?

My new job is hostess of your boat.

Yeah, we'll talk about that later. I've got plans for you.

I gathered that. I gather you also have some plans that involve the president.

Oh, that. Yes, that.

Look, do you mind explaining a little? It's just 50% worth, hmm?

Well, it just sort of bubbled up in the conversation.

You know how those things happen between people.

You already had the contract to take the president's party to the inauguration,

but you didn't want to tell me until you and I made our deal, huh?

Well, no, not quite.

What does that mean?

Well, I did bid on the contract.

Who got it?

I promised not to divulge that information.

Who got it? Captain Morgan! Do you expect him to

give up that contract? Well, no, no, not exactly.

What exactly?

Well...

We could usurp the Tennessee's contract.

What's usurp?

Oh, latch on to Shanghai.

We're gonna Shanghai the President of the United States?

Well...

Yeah, you might call it that.

That is what you're gonna hang for.

Well, how else can we get the padlock off the Enterprise?

I don't know. I don't know,

but I sure never figured we'd have to Shanghai

the President of the United States to do it.

Fifteen years.

What are you mumbling about?

Fifteen years it took me to save that $10,000,

and I let you talk me out of it in 15 minutes. Oh,

stop your grumbling, will you? You got a good deal.

I think we're counting too much on Lucy Bell.

I don't think that girl even understands your crazy idea.

Lucy Bell knows the information we want, and she knows how to get it.

What makes you think she'll even get in there to see Captain Morgan? Lucy Bell?

Well, if she does see him, what makes you think

you'll tell her anything? I don't know.

Wouldn't you? Yeah.

Yeah.

Date your business, ma'am.

Would you all tell the captain of the Tennessee that

his cousin from Kentucky is here to see him?

Cousin from Kentucky, ma'am?

That's right.

Please, sir, it's most important.

Come aboard, cousin.

I'm Captain Morgan.

Well, I guessed that the Tennessee is the one that's

going to take the president to the inauguration.

How did you guess that?

Well, it could only be your boat or the Enterprise.

And I know it isn't the Enterprise.

Why not?

Well, because the sheriff's got the enterprise all locked up.

Big chain, and a long log, and everything.

He has them.

I can stand most anything, but not the thought of that Morgan laughing at us.

Will you stop imagining things?

I know that sidewinder from way back. He's got a distorted sense of humor.

I wonder how Lucy Bell is doing.

And what?

Oh, this is Tennessee's passport to history.

Captain, I'd be just ever so grateful if maybe you could take me along.

I've never been to an inauguration before.

Well, it's about time you went, but... Yes.

What about your reputation?

Seeing a single woman at an all-man party on a riverboat?

Well, you know how it is.

People might get to thinking that...

Oh, Captain, just imagine little old me being able to say that I was there.

Lucy Bell, you're coming from town. You never even saw Morgan. I knew it.

Everything's just fine. How could it be? You're coming from town.

I promised to give word to Sheriff Stone to meet us,

and he's going to be here at daybreak.

We're leaving at daybreak? That's right. You got the whole plan?

That's right.

Lucy, now, Lucy, wait a minute. Now, please, tell me what you found out, huh?

Which one is the presidential suite?

Oh, this one right in there. Look, what did you find out?

May I use this one?

Yeah, sure. Now, tell me, tell me about the plans, huh?

Well, as I told you, Chef Stone's going to meet us here at sunup.

Now, as fast as he unlocks that little old paddle wheel,

head the boat south to Spithead Point, as fast as you can.

South, son of, Spithead Point. Oh, Lucy,

you must have some more to tell me about the plans.

That's all for tonight.

Tell you the rest when we're underway.

Night, Mr. Flash.

You're sure she didn't see anything else? That's all she said.

Go south at sunup to Spithead Point. Spithead Point.

She must have said more than that. No, no, that's all.

Larks, I don't buy it.

She's all yours. Shut up.

What are you afraid of?

Well, if the Tennessee sees us pull out, they might get wind of what we're up to.

You can't tell what those fellows might do.

They might even try and steal our president from us.

Steal the president?

Ridiculous. Nobody would be crazy enough to do a thing like that. Well,

you don't know Captain Morgan of the Tennessee.

And that reminds me, I better go over and see Morgan.

He's going to be mighty disappointed losing the chance to bid on the enterprise.

I think I can't go. Why not?

We're pulling out any minute.

What? Well, you'll just have to wait a few minutes.

We can't take a chance on that. Well,

why didn't you tell me yesterday we might pull out at this ridiculous hour?

I would have seen Morgan when they birthed.

We didn't know then. Well, I know.

I can't afford to hurt Morgan's feelings. Listen,

the captain's law on board his ship.

Don't you tell me about law. All right, you go ahead.

You be responsible for divulging a state secret.

Next time you step foot on my deck, I'll throw you in the brig.

You wouldn't dare.

Article 606 of the Rivers and Highway Act, we'd have no choice.

That's right. You go over to Tennessee and we'll all end up in the brig.

Well, all right.

Now, you know, if I were a betting man,

I'd wager that we were picking up the presidential party at Spithead Point.

John, I'm sorry, but you're not allowed up here.

Well, I feel like one of the family. Captain Holden, this fellow's distracting me.

You see, riverboat men are superstitious, not

nothing personal, you understand? Sure.

State room number seven is going to be the presidential suite. Now,

why don't you go down there and rest until he comes aboard?

Well, that's mighty nice of you.

Now, I like the way you think.

You're going to go places. Yeah, well, now, don't

worry. You won't miss a thing. We'll wait in time.

Thanks. You're all right.

But that partner of yours, he owes me more respect.

Well, you'll get it in time.

He doesn't know you as well as I do.

Where is that Lucifer? We don't get some more information pretty soon.

I'm going to bust a gasket.

All right, hold on, I'm coming!

Hello, son.

What are you doing up so early?

I'm always up and due in by seven.

You think Sheriff Stone would have taught you how to tell the time of day by now?

He's sure a smart one, isn't he, Father?

Who?

Ain't you heard? Ain't you heard? No, I ain't you heard.

Mortician Pierce got himself elected to go upriver with the president.

Son, you didn't wake me up with this hour to tell me that, did you?

Oh, but Father, Sheriff Stone figured to go.

That's too bad.

In case I forget, you tell him next time, better luck.

You gotta hand it to him.

You gotta hand what to who, son?

Sheriff Stone.

He pulled some strings, and he got himself on the trip anyway.

Better than stuffing the ballot boxes, eh, son?

Yeah, he's on his way up the river.

What?

He told me that when the Enterprise left, I should tell everybody.

What's the Enterprise leaving got to do with telling everybody?

She's the boo.

Is that a fact now?

Yeah, and he's on her now, and she's on her way upriver.

Now, son, I want you to think carefully before you answer me.

You're going to be downright pleased with the way I savvy.

Now, Sheriff Stone is going to the inauguration, is that right?

Yep.

And the Enterprise is picking up the presidential party? Yep.

And they already left?

Oh, over half an hour ago, sir.

Hey, your clock is wrong.

No!

What's all the excitement? Just wait till I get

my hands on a champ! We were like brothers!

But this is worse than what Cain did to Abel!

What are you doing in there?

Well, what are you doing going in there?

I'm here on business.

Me too.

Uh, tell me, uh, just how'd you get to go on this

trip? I mean, uh, who's your connections?

Mark Eisen?

Kurt?

Must be to Tennessee. Must mean something.

Most certainly does.

There's a right here in his passport.

Passport?

Cousin Morgan called this a passport.

You just never know how gracious he was.

Yeah.

Whistle four times when you are one half off and spit head point.

The president and his party will be waiting at Lafarge's

plantation so they can board without your tying up.

The boat's to be there at 8.30 sharp.

Our time is perfect.

Yes, but Captain Morgan's isn't.

What do you mean?

I said his clock back an hour.

Lucy Bell, honey, I told you I'd give you a ride

in the most celebrated boat in the Mississippi.

Well, you're going to get one.

Hurry! Full speed ahead!

More steam, boy! More steam!

Come on now, boy. You can give us some more steam.

Let me worry about the boiler.

Yeah, go on, boy.

We're really going to Shanghai the present.

May the Lord have mercy on our souls.

All right, pour it on. We need all the steam we can get.

Might as well go whole hog.

There's a boat back there that seems to be trying to signal us or something.

Oh, no, it's just imagination, Sheriff.

Why don't you go on back down to the presidential suite?

I could have sworn I heard all kinds of whistles.

Well, it's getting exciting already.

I think I'll go rehearse my speech. Yeah.

I want you to know how much I appreciate what you're doing.

Bill, Bill, in case I don't get a chance... You don't have to say it, Captain.

I understand.

No, no, it's tradition.

A man has a right to go down with his ship.

We did what we had to do. For the Enterprise.

For the enterprise.

Excuse me.

She's right on time.

Beautiful sight, eh, Mr. President?

It'll take a good man to bring that paddle wheeler up against

the current and hold her long enough for us to board.

Well, sir, if you think it's too dangerous,

I'm sure we can make other plans right away. Not at all.

I could use some excitement.

Makes the old pump work better.

Of course.

What's that other boat doing coming this way?

You were afraid of that too, Governor DeWitt?

No, sir, but it isn't good for security, sir.

You and your security.

Full starboard rudder. Take a direct course to Baton Rouge.

The Enterprise docks. I'll be waiting for them.

Yes, sir, I'll be waiting for them.

I hope.

Shanghai and the prison wasn't too bad after all.

Now all I have to worry about is what the prison would like for breakfast.

What do we do now?

Well, I'm going to have Morgan do it for us.

He's going to race back to Baton Rouge,

and he's going to have everybody there just waiting for us with cannon. Well,

you sure don't expect him to keep our Shanghai in the present all to himself,

do you? Well, of course not.

I'm counting on him shooting his mouth off. Counting on him? Well, of course.

He's going to make us the most talked about boat in the river.

Well, Morgan will do that for us all right. He'll tell everybody.

What are we going to tell the president?

Huh?

Oh, well, I'll think of something. But when?

I got a funny feeling we're running out of time.

Mr. President.

Gentlemen.

Fellow delegates.

What can we do for you, sir?

Tell the captain when he is satisfied he can leave the bridge.

He will do me the honor to have breakfast at his table.

Aye, aye, Mr. President.

Mr. President!

Mr. President, as a sheriff of Baton Rouge,

I extend to you a bon voyage aboard the Enterprise.

What in tarnation boat is this, sir?

It'll be my pleasure.

The Enterprise.

Stop this boat! I knew it! Turn this boat around! We're on the wrong boat!

Give me that gun! We're being kidnapped! Oh, this is unpardonable!

Don't point that gun unless you intend to use it.

Mr. President!

You do us great honor, sir, to breakfast with us.

Good morning, gentlemen.

I'm Captain Holden of the Enterprise.

This is Captain Blake. We are co-owners of the boat. Now then,

is there something we can do for you? Do you know, sir, what you're doing?

Why, yes, yes, with all due modesty, we know what we're doing.

Otherwise, how could we run the best boat in the Mississippi?

But you've just shanghaied the President of the United States!

Sir, the President of the United States is aboard our boat

without our invitation and without our permission.

He came aboard of his own free will and accord.

And we are most certainly not going to put the

President of the United States off the boat.

Unless, of course, he wants to be put off.

Are we, Captain Blake? No. Now then, gentlemen,

there are only two parties in the world who

can stop this boat. The President and us.

And we are not going to stop it.

So, it's up to the President.

You knew exactly what you were doing, and you have a reason.

Now what is it? To save our boat from the auction block, sir.

Well, looks like you've won your battle.

Not quite, Mr. President. There's still one tactical problem remaining.

What's that?

Well, according to your itinerary, you have a stop scheduled at Baton Rouge.

Oh, all this apple polishing means nothing whatever to me.

But I do understand we have an honorary delegate to pick up there.

Mr. President, sir.

I'm chairman of the committee, and...

It was always intended that I should be that delicate.

Gentlemen, if I learned anything as a general,

it was that battles are always won by pressing your advantage. You mean, sir,

that we can bypass Baton Rouge?

Outflank them, son.

Outflank them. Yes, sir.

Now, would you be good enough to invite me to breakfast?

I got something real special all ready for you, Mr. President.

Good to see you, sir. It's a real pleasure to come. Thank you.

Well, Lucifer, you just made history, that's all. You just made history.