All language subtitles for [FreeUse Milf] - The Perks of Graduation ⭐️ Free FULL Video!

(dramatic music)

(dramatic music)

- Surprise! - Surprise!

- You guys did this for me? - Yes.

- Of course, sweetie. - Whoa, oh my God,

you're the best stepmom ever.

You guys made my graduation so much better.

Wow.

- I just can't believe you finally graduated.

- I know, I'm just so glad it's finally over.

Now I can finally focus on my future.

- I remember when he was this little,

and now he's all grown up and graduating.

- Man time sure does fly.

- Ugh, I never thought I would see this day.

Really, you've just worked so hard,

and I can't believe that you finally pulled it off.

- Thank you guys so much. - Yes.

- I really don't know what to say.

Just so excited to just move on with my life now

and pursue an even bigger education.

And it's just, ah, it's all right in front of me.

- Yes, yes, yes, but all those things sound so good,

but for now we're gonna party

and we're gonna celebrate you graduating.

And speaking of celebrate,

I have something for you. - No way.

- Yes. - This is for me?

- You're aunt and I hope you love it.

- Oh, this is too much, you guys are amazing.

Can I?

Really?

- For a whole week? - For a whole week?

- Wow.

- Remember last semester when I said,

if you tried really hard

and you dedicated yourself to your studies

and you focused on school and you actually graduated,

you could do whatever you wanted for an entire week.

- Wow, that sounds amazing.

- Here we are. - You guys didn't get a car?

- Well, I mean, would you rather a car?

Would you rather the original plan we discussed?

- I kinda like your guys' plan more.

- Yeah, you're aunt Vanessa and I thought you would.

- I mean, who wouldn't really?

- Exactly.

- Did you see Miss Jones at graduation in that dress?

What an attention whore.

- I did. I just can't believe she goes out in public like that,

let alone to a family function.

- I know. - I mean, let's be modest.

We all have our children there.

She just, you know, she just thinks she can pick people up,

even if it's broad daylight.

- Her and broad daylight is really rough too, so.

She went a little too heavy on the foundation today,

and you can definitely see it.

- I know, I just can't believe it.

Can't believe it at all.

And did you see that work she had done?

I don't even think she looks better.

I think it actually-- - It looks worse.

- It did, it made her look worse.

- It was supposed to make her look younger,

but it made her look, I'd say five years older.

- I know, I know.

And you know, the frustrating part is,

most of us are married.

I mean, what is she trying to pick up?

My husband? I don't understand.

I'll never understand that, lady.

Thankfully, we don't have to see her anymore.

- I know.

- We're finished. - Yes.

- Yes.

- Finally, don't have to see them anymore,

now that he's graduated.

- Moving on to bigger and better things.

- Yes, exactly.

Speaking of bigger and better things,

what are we going to do?

With all of this time that he's spent in class,

what are we going to have him do?

We need to get this one a job.

- He definitely going to get him a job.

I wonder what we could get him as a job.

Well, I mean, he did graduate with an engineering degree.

So I just don't know if he's ready yet.

- I mean-- - For an eight to five?

I don't know.

- I think since he's just graduated,

maybe take a couple months off.

Can have some fun, maybe go on a nice family vacation.

- That sounds fun, yeah.

I mean, he'll always be my baby.

- Yes.

- I can remember just not that long ago,

he was nursing.

(laughing)

All right, it seems like it was just like a couple of years

ago and now he's all grown up.

It's just so bizarre.

- Beyond bizarre.

- Like it almost seems like it was just a couple of years ago

that we were out partying and we were in college ourselves

getting wild and crazy and showing up to graduation drunk.

- With no underwear on.

That was you though, that wasn't me.

I didn't do that.

- No, I mean, I had a little bit too much fun

at the pre-graduating party.

Didn't really sleep, kinda just throwing myself together

and I mean, we graduated, right?

That's all that really matters.

- That is all that matters.

And now we got him through graduation.

So, I think we did a great job, yeah.

- We did do a great job. - Absolutely.

- Yeah, if it wasn't for you two,

there was no way I could have graduated.

You guys helped me out so much.

- Yeah, we definitely did, especially the couple of times

I had to go have some talks with your professors.

About getting your grade changed.

- Aunt Vanessa is a world-class talker too.

She can shmooze with the best of 'em.

- How did you think I graduated?

- Absolutely.

- Too bad he didn't go to the same college

that we went to 'cause it would've been so easy

to get his grades up with some of the professors that

we went to school with.

- Let's face it, they only liked you because you were hot.

They let you get away with murder.

- Do you think Ms. Adams cheats on her husband all the time?

- Oh, all the time.

There's no way she doesn't.

- Ugh, yeah.

- Like why not just get divorced then?

Like, you know, the kids aren't old enough.

- I guess so.

- I may or may not have seen him out to lunch

with another woman before too, but I just keep my mouth shut.

- Ooh, I mean, but how much fun would it be

to just like implode that relationship and just sit back

and we could've just watched it all unfold?

That would've been so much fun.

(sighing)

Yeah, but you know. (laughing)

- Oh, sorry.

- All of this graduation celebration

has me kind of hungry.

- Yes.

- What are you thinking about eating?

- I don't know.

And Vanessa, what do you want to eat?

What sounds good to you?

- Um, that's a good question.

I remember there was this new Chinese place down the street.

I haven't been there yet though.

- Okay.

- Have you there?

Have you guys gone?

- No, it's the one by the grocery store, right?

- Yeah, yeah.

- That one, oh my gosh.

You know, I can totally eat some good chow mein,

chicken fried rice.

That sounds amazing.

I would love that.

I think we should go there.

- That sounds great.

- That would be a good idea.

And if they have some, you know, I don't know, like.

I'm trying to think.

What is that dish that I, oh, cashew chicken.

There we go.

We could just get a bunch of things.

- We should definitely get a bunch of things.

- Yeah, like do a family style.

- Whatever, we don't finish.

We can always just bring home and celebrate.

Yeah.

- Eat later.

- Leftovers.

I think that's a great idea.

Could we stop at the pharmacy first though?

I need to pick up a couple things.

- Okay.

- That sounds great.

Should we head out right now?

- Yeah, let me go get my keys and we'll head out, okay?

- All right.

.

- Oh, hey auntie, you look amazing.

- Oh, thank you so much.

- Of course, you going somewhere?

- Um, yeah, me and your mother just going to a corporate

brunch thing, you know.

- Okay, it sounds like fun, but you already look amazing.

So it's good.

- Had to wear a work attire, you know, our boss wants to

make sure that we all get along.

So he drives us through these things.

So you know how it is, right?

- I know.

- Or you will soon.

- Not really excited for that part.

- I love it a job soon enough.

- I know, I'm just not really sure what people will say on

their first interviews and stuff.

It all seems so professional and I can't really like, you

know, say what I want.

It seems like a lot to you guys.

- Have you guys, or have you had any thought about what you

would want to do?

- Well, I love engineering and stuff and computers.

And it seems like real fun.

.

- How long do you want to wait til you start applying for

jobs though?

- Still got a week, remember?

- Yes, you definitely still have at least a week.

(sighs)

- Are you excited for this week?

- Huh, well, I think in most of it, aren't I?

- Sure seems like it, the week is just barely begun.

- Do you know if your mom's going to be down soon?

- Oh yeah, she should be coming here soon.

- I think she's getting dressed right now as we speak.

- Okay, perfect.

- Yeah, she kind of takes quite a long time when she's

getting ready.

- Oh, don't I know it?

Oh my gosh, you think it's bad now?

It was way worse when we were your age.

(sighs)

- Do you have any fine graduation parties this weekend?

- I was a vibe into a few, but I'm still so anti-social.

I just don't know what these other college kids really like

to talk about when we're not in school anymore.

- I mean, you guys aren't just taking shots and getting

drunk and dancing to music.

That's what parties are all about.

- Yeah, but all the really popular kids like going to that

kind of just, you know, wanna do my own thing.

- There's nothing wrong with that, so just do whatever

works for you.

- Yeah, you're right.

I mean, who knows, I'll probably check out one of these

parties.

- You should definitely try to go to some of the parties.

You only graduate once, right?

- Hmm.

You wouldn't want to miss out on those core memories.

- Yeah, I think you're right.

- And don't worry, either me or your mother can pick you up.

So you don't have to worry about drinking and driving.

- Come on, I'm an adult.

I'm pretty sure I can drive myself, but I won't do anything

irresponsible.

- Of course you're an adult and you can drive yourself,

but adults still are not supposed to drink and get drunk

and then drive.

- Oh, of course not.

- Safety first.

- Never have to worry about me doing that.

- No plans for the rest of the day?

- Probably not.

Spent all day doing my chores and I think I'm just gonna be

lazy today.

- Well, you don't have to go to school anymore, so that's

probably the best thing you can do, just have a nice,

lazy day.

- Exactly.

Like I said, I'm trying to make the best out of my week.

Might not be doing anything today, but I still got six more

days.

- Hmm, yes you do.

You should definitely use this week.

- Hmm, as best as you can.

I'm ready.

Sorry for the wake, guys.

- Wow, you look great.

- Thank you.

You love my outfit?

- It looks amazing.

- Yes.

- You and Auntie are gonna look so great today.

- Well, we have a very important lunch in to head to.

- I'm so not looking forward to it.

You look great though, he's not wrong.

- Thank you, you do too.

I love that you've got the white collared shirt memo.

- Yes.

- We'll be the butt stress sisters there.

- We always are.

- Always.

Yeah.

So I'm really, really, really hoping that the office

politics are kept to a minimum.

Yeah.

- Me too.

- I just can't stand when everyone starts getting so

catty and it's just really frustrating.

So I hope everyone gets along today.

And there's no drama.

And I don't have to listen to any silly stories from our boss.

I've got one guy who's about the fishing.

Ugh.

- Wow, you guys are making work sound like it's a lot.

Do you think I should really pursue something like that?

- Well, we all have to work

eventually, it's called work for a reason.

Not cause it's fun.

- I guess you're right.

- It's what you went to school for to get a job.

You didn't go to school and put in all that time

and energy to just hang out.

- Yeah, you're right.

Gotta make a living somehow.

- Yes, you can't rely on a mom and dad to pay for everything,

for too much longer.

Don't you want a new car?

The only way you're gonna get a new car is if you get a job.

- She has a good point.

- Yeah.

Your dad already said he's not gonna buy you one.

And I'd get in trouble if I went against his wishes.

- You're right.

They have been telling me the whole time I was in school

that that's what I have to look forward to.

Work, work, work, you're gonna have to get up early.

- Like I said, it's called work for a reason.

But it's okay.

You'll have a couple jobs that you hate until you find the job

that you really like and that just works with you.

Or you'll just be in a job that you hate forever until

you reach your breaking point and you just quit.

In the most dramatic way possible.

- I don't want that to happen.

- Oh trust me, it'll happen.

And it's actually really liberating and so much fun.

I'm not done in once or twice.

- Wow.

I never knew life could be such a roller coaster.

Thank you guys so much for sharing this with me.

- Yes, life is definitely a roller coaster.

And there's lots of obstacles and twists and turns along the way.

(sighing)

So that brings us to your next task,

which is to find a hobby.

- Well, I've always enjoyed sports, remember?

- Sports or maybe something a little more refined.

- Hmm, like what, an instrument?

(sighing)

Well, an instrument, that sounds good.

- What did you have in mind?

- I thought something like golf, though.

Golf, we're gonna turn him into one of these golf guys already.

- Well, he's gonna have to learn how to entertain people

if he's gonna have business associates.

- I mean, yeah, I guess.

- Boys in their golf.

- Well, golf is pretty fun.

- What, said no one ever.

You won't know until you try, though, right?

Definitely try golf, maybe do something more fun,

like riding motorcycles or...

Going to the shooting range, maybe.

You can go surfing.

- That all sounds really, really fun.

You can't just pick one.

Why don't you guys come with me and we can try them all together?

- That sounds like a really good idea, don't you think?

- Since we have a whole week. - It does, I love it.

Yes.

Oh.

I'm so not looking forward to this brunch today.

- Well, you know, we just have to make the best of it.

It's a mandated company event.

- I'm so sick of these events.

I swear it's like at least two or three every month

as if we don't have better things to do

or, you know, lives outside of work.

- Well, you know, it's because Mr. Smith just doesn't want

to be around his wife anymore.

I mean, I'm sure you've heard the office rumblings about that.

- Yes, I definitely have. I absolutely have.

- And him and the new assistant allegedly have a thing going on.

- No wonder. - So that's why there's so many work

functions because those two need excuses.

It's so annoying how they always drag us into their office

drama. Like why can't they just, you know, have fun in a hotel

room like normal people who are having a fair deal?

- Like really? - You know, I don't know.

I often wonder the same thing.

- Does that kind of drama always happen in your workplace?

- It does. - Hmm, always.

And it will likely happen at yours.

So you just have to be a good boy and keep your head down

and not fraternize with any of the women at work.

- Yes, do not, I repeat, do not have sex with anybody

that you work with.

That never ends well.

- Seems very unprofessional too.

- Yes, it is very unprofessional, but I mean, sometimes it is a

little fun. If you know you're going to leave the job, then

fuck whoever you want at that job.

Literally and figuratively.

- And Vanessa always with the words of wisdom.

You know, always tell the T straight.

Honey, you just need to focus on doing a great job at work

after you find a job.

- That is, you can't keep coursing around.

- Or you can.

- Many years to do that.

Your father will be very disappointed if you don't find

something soon.

He made that list and emailed it to you.

All those contacts he told you were graduating.

You should be getting calls to line up the interviews.

(clapping)

- He's still, I mentioned that to him earlier too, and he was

like, I still have one more week.

I was like, I know, I know.

Me and your mom know about your one week.

Don't you worry we haven't forgotten.

- We know all about your one week.

- This is probably going to be the best week ever.

- Yes.

- I'm sorry, I'm so amazing.

- But don't put it off for too long because we're not going

to be footing the bill for you anymore.

- Well, I think.

(shuffling)

- Do you know where we're going for this?

Like what place we're going to brunch for?

- We're going to that Ritzy hotel.

- Oh.

- Didn't you read the email?

- No, I knew you. - I knew you.

- You had it all handled.

- Of course, I'm always the responsible one.

- That's why I love you.

- We're going to that new resort.

- Okay.

- And it's gonna be fabulous.

- Hmm.

- So.

- I can't wait.

- Yeah, I think, you know, I think I'm going to splurge

and I think I'm going to get some bacon

because I worked up quite an appetite this morning already.

- You should.

- It was like splurge, it's the company's dime.

- So.

- Bring them limosas, keep them coming, keep them coming.

- Absolutely.

I think that's my plan.

- It's definitely a good plan.

I'm really going to splurge especially since they're

making us come out on a freaking Sunday for work,

like as if we don't already have to go to work tomorrow.

Now we have to have a company event on the weekend.

So rude, but I'm definitely going to order it.

Definitely ordering some bacon,

maybe get a full on lunch platter.

- Yeah.

- Just.

And then all the drinks, shots, limosas,

maybe we should take a car service to brunch.

- Only if you promise not to hit on the drivers.

It's so embarrassing to do that.

- All right, I won't hit on the driver

when we're going to brunch,

but there's no guarantee what I may do after brunch.

(sighs)

- I mean, come on, live a little.

I'm just going to have a little bit of fun, you know?

- I understand.

I completely get it.

And football games on later and your favorite team is playing.

So I thought I would make us some popcorn,

maybe some avocado dip.

We can get--

- Pizza, pizza right?

- Our cozy days and hang out.

- Yeah, pizza.

- That's what I'm talking about, don't be hanging.

(laughs)

- Love pizza.

- The yard guy is supposed to come today.

So I really need you to watch out for him.

- Okay.

- Can you do that?

- Of course.

- Are you sure?

- Yeah.

- Okay, there's an envelope for him, okay?

- Okay.

- Speaking of, I think, what time is it?

- We're starting to run a little bit late.

- Really?

- Oh, sister, you love making an entrance.

- Don't you? - Don't you?

- You're the sir that we're going to be late.

(laughs)

- I mean, as long as we're casually late, right?

That's all that really matters.

So you're just gonna stay home all day

and make sure to let the gardeners in the back gate?

- Of course, and I'm gonna make sure

I find the envelope too before I get him.

- Okay, good.

Good.

'Cause no telling when we'll be back,

hopefully by like five o'clock or so,

so if you watch the game, but,

the game's on at seven.

- Okay.

- Don't worry, and if anything,

I'll just prove it. - Maybe six

for the pre-game show.

So we'll have plenty of time,

and I do need time to get everything prepped, so.

- Yeah, what prepped? - The avocado,

the guacamole, let's go to brunch.

I'm starving now, let's talk about food.

- Okay.

Don't fall asleep while the gardeners are supposed to come.

- All right, yes ma'am.

- Ma'am, that's your mother, I'm not.

I'm here in fun, don't call me ma'am.

- What a day.

I know, today at work was just,

I cannot deal with her at work anymore.

- I know.

Auntie Vanessa!

Mom, you didn't tell me

that she was staying over the night.

- Yeah, well, hi honey, yes,

we're having a little slumber party tonight.

- Oh, wow, you guys look so good.

- Oh, hey, aren't you supposed to be in bed by now, sweetie?

- Yeah, it's still over the week,

and remember, no college, no rules.

I'm still doing my thing.

- Oh, that excuse is not gonna last you much longer.

- Right, I'm an adult now, I can do whatever I want.

- So does that mean you're paying rent, right?

- When I get my job, remember?

- Speaking of that, are you applying any interviews?

Do we need to take you shopping for a new interview outfit?

- Oh, that sounds like so much fun.

- Please say yes, please say you have an interview.

- Yeah, I have it actually too lined up, I'm just,

like I said last time, I'm not really sure

what to do or say.

- Well, the first part of the interview

is always looking the best.

- Absolutely, always looking professional,

always looking, you know,

better than the people that are interviewing you.

- 'Cause you are better than them,

and that's the attitude you have to go in there with,

is I'm better than you.

- Absolutely.

- And I know it, and I'm gonna get the job and you're not.

- Right, totally.

- Shopping trip.

- I can't wait, oh my gosh, that new department store opened up.

Oh gosh, over by the strip mall.

I forget the name of it,

but I think they're having a really big sale next weekend.

- Ooh. - Yes, yes.

- Yes. - I'm so excited, we have to go.

- I would love to go.

(panting)

That all sounds like super fun,

but it seems like a huge process just for an interview.

- I mean, it's the start of your new life,

so yeah, of course, it is a big process.

Kind of like a first date, you know?

You gotta get all ready, you get nervous,

you think about what you're gonna say,

what you're gonna do, where you're gonna take her.

- Absolutely.

- And you know, first impression is everything,

so they're gonna be judging you

based on what you look like and what you're wearing.

- Wow, sounds like so much to account for.

- Yes, so I think we need to make a list,

we're gonna need some shoes, we're gonna need some socks,

some nice new slacks.

- Yes, absolutely, some button-ups,

we're gonna need some undershirts.

Oh, what about a watch?

- Ooh. - Do you still have

your dad's watch he gave you?

- Yeah. - Are you sure?

- It's stored somewhere safe in my room.

- Oh, oh sure it is, okay, so that means-

- Somewhere safe. - That means it's lost.

- Somewhere safe. - Okay.

- Well, maybe we'll look at a new watch as well.

So yeah, and a belt, and you know,

we still need to work on this hair.

Can't have your hair getting as long as mine.

- I have to cut my hair again.

- Of course you do, honey, it's corporate America.

- I mean, I do have a hair appointment this weekend,

so he could tag along and I'll have my lady

cut his hair for him.

- I thought we were doing a girls' day though.

- Okay, okay. - He just had

this whole week with us. - That's true, that's true,

that's true.

- So, can we talk about getting a new car?

- I thought we already discussed that. - No.

- Sorry.

- Can we talk about you paying rent?

- Yeah, you know, we talked about that too.

I'll get a job soon, just enjoying my week.

- You definitely have been enjoying your week, haven't you?

- Oh yeah, so much.

- All grown up, graduated college, just living the life,

not having to wake up and go to school.

Must be nice.

Me and your mother have had such a long week at work

and I'm so ready for the weekend.

So ready, absolutely, I can't wait for the weekend to come.

Speaking of which, when we go shopping for you,

I could use some new bra and panty sets as well.

So, Auntie Vanessa and I will have to go shopping together.

We'll have to, maybe we can drop you at the arcade,

what do you think?

- Sounds great.

- Yeah, I know you brought the arcade.

Yes.

- He's an adult, now we're not dropping him off

at the arcade.

- Oh, he can have a little fun.

- I think he can go into this apartment store

and start looking at clothes and tell him, yes, this works.

No, that doesn't work and when all of it doesn't work,

we'll just pick it out ourselves.

But he can be a little bit more useful.

Perhaps, perhaps.

- I'm pretty sure we might have time for everything, right?

- There's always time for everything.

- Like being an adult isn't always fun, so.

- What else?

Do you have a portfolio, a portfolio for your interviews?

So you can take notes and,

do we need to make you some business cards?

- No, he doesn't need a business card yet, right?

- You don't think so?

Well, you know, you want him to stand out.

- But we all do.

- We don't want him to seem too cocky.

- Yeah, that's true.

- 'Cause it's not like, you know, he's,

he doesn't have a resume necessarily,

except high school and college.

- You're right.

Well, maybe we should make him a resume.

Speaking of resumes.

- You really do have the best at mind-over.

- What if we just typed him up something simple

and put it in the portfolio so that he can disseminate it

to all of the people that are gonna be interviewing him.

- I mean, but he is an adult. - I love that idea.

- We can't do everything for him still.

- I think we should book a spa day.

- Ooh, we should absolutely book a spa day.

- Yeah.

- I think that would be great.

- This spa sounds fun.

- We can say you could come.

- Ugh, dang.

- I know you just graduated and all,

but all the fun and hoopla isn't gonna last forever.

- Yeah.

- Plus you need some time here to reach out

to all those contacts you're down emailed, Joe.

He forwarded me the email he sent.

Should take a couple hours.

- Yeah, you should get started on that.

- I guess so.

- Those interviews aren't gonna make themselves.

I know it seems like we're trying to scare you

on everything but we're just trying to prepare you

for what's to come.

- Absolutely.

- Sometimes work can be fun.

It's not always fun, but occasionally it can be rewarding

and a very good time.

- Well, what are some things I should look out for

to know I'm working for the right place?

- Um, well, definitely you don't want long hours.

- Nope, you don't want long hours.

You really wanna make sure that they have

a good vacation package.

- That is definitely a must 'cause--

- Benefits?

- Yes, benefits for sure.

You wanna make sure that you're definitely respected at work

and not being harassed or taken advantage of.

- Yes, you wanna make sure that their upper management

is just really well-credentialed.

And 401k, all of these things.

- I recommend making sure that your boss isn't hot though

'cause then you might end up having sex with them

and then get fired or just things can get sticky.

Like I said the other day, in the kitchen,

make sure you just don't have any kind of sexual relations

with someone you work with 'cause it gets sticky.

- Absolutely.

Huh, this is all very informative.

Thank you guys.

- As long as you have fun and you make some money though,

screw it.

It's all that really matters.

You make money so that you can pay your own rent

or you know, maybe move out.

We can have this house back to ourselves again.

- It would be great if you could get your own apartment.

- Yeah, I mean, you have a girlfriend now.

- Yeah, yeah sort of, I'm just so shy.

I haven't even taken her on her first date yet.

- What, she's not your girlfriend then.

I'll tell you that right now.

You definitely need to take her out.

- I've been taking her on her first date.

- I know.

- What do you guys just hang out in your room?

- No, I kinda like to you guys that she's my girlfriend

'cause I don't want to be embarrassed

that I haven't even asked her out yet.

- So she's just your friend then?

- Yeah, yeah, but I think we like each other.

- Well, you better hop on that before somebody else does.

- Yeah.

- Girls don't wait around forever.

- No, and they like guys with a stability.

- Yes, that is a very important.

- Stability is so important.

- Mental stability and financial stability.

- Right, absolutely, and she's gonna wanna visit you

in your own home, so. - Yeah, she's definitely gonna want

to come back to your mom's place.

- No, not at all.

I mean, she's more than welcome to come here

and bake cookies with me anytime she wants,

but aside from that, do you have any fresh cookies?

- I do, I baked some earlier.

- As a matter of fact, I made some really yummy

oatmeal chocolate chip.

- Oatmeal, yeah.

- Oh, it's healthy for you. - Your mom's oatmeal cookies.

- Hard to help you guys, come on, oh fine.

You know what, because I know you guys have the sweet tooth,

I made your favorite.

- What is it? - I made your favorite.

- What do you mean? - Chocolate chip.

- It is, yes, and I even got you a thing

of chocolate milk tube and vanilla ice cream.

- Yes. - I know, I'll just have

to eat the oatmeal all to myself.

- Oh, what's she thinking that we want oatmeal?

- Right, that's for us on the oatmeal, the better.

- We're not 60 yet. - So, heart health starts way earlier

than you're 60, it's okay.

So, it's fine, I got you your junk,

it's fine, I got you some chips too.

- Yes. - So.

- She's the best, isn't she?

- She's amazing. - That's it.

- I always know the exact right things to treat us.

- She really does.

- Well, you're my family, so.

- Oh, and that's why we love you.

- Yes, absolutely.

It just dawned on me that we're gonna have to get long

sleeves to cover those tattoos.

- What are you talking about?

- Yeah. - Yeah.

- You don't remember your mom telling you about

how you're gonna have to cover those tattoos

up when you start applying for jobs.

- Oh, where are some jobs that accept these kinds of things?

You might find a cool job, who knows?

- Maybe, you might just find a cool job.

- I might.

- But for the interview process,

you definitely need to wear a long-sleeved shirt

and cover up your tattoos, 'cause you don't want them

judging you as soon as you walked in the door.

- I guess you're right.

Let's see how you guys are putting it.

- I mean, we do know better, you know?

So, I think this next week for dinner,

what if we do an Italian night?

What do you guys think about that?

- That sounds awesome. - Does it?

- That sounds so good. - I can bake some spaghetti,

your favorite meatballs. - Oh, yes.

- We can get some breadsticks. - Yes.

- I think that sounds fun.

I think I'll do that.

- You'll have to help me make a list, Auntie Vanessa.

We'll have to do that.

- I can help you make the list, but--

- Yeah.

- We'll probably be playing video games

on the couch while you cook.

- Yeah. - That's fine.

That's fine.

I mean, you know how I like my red wine when I'm cooking, so--

- Oh, I'll be drinking a little bit while we're--

- The more the merrier. - The merrier.

- You are right, the more the merrier.

- The more the merrier, absolutely, there's something--

- There's something right with you.

- Yes, play some video games.

And maybe I even do some tiramisu.

- Ooh.

- I mean, of course I'm not gonna eat any

because I have to keep this figure, but you too can.

- We can just go to the gym the next day.

- Oh, perfect.

Yeah, we have a half day at work the next day,

so that would be so good.

- That's not funny. - Yeah, absolutely.

(groaning)

- So, what day are we doing the Italian night?

- Well, let's see, I have my bridge group on Tuesday.

- You have a bridge group?

- Oh, well, yes.

With the women from my sewing group.

So, I have that Tuesday, what about Wednesday?

- Wednesday's great. - I think the schedule's

clear Wednesday, and you don't have school anymore.

- Yeah. - So, why don't we plan

on Wednesday?

- I think that would be perfect.

- I think that's great, and that'll give us a couple days

to find a movie on one of the streaming platforms.

- Yeah, so Wednesday is leg day,

so I can have all those carbs and put them to use.

- I love it, it's so great, and I'm getting a massage

on Wednesday afternoon, so you'll be nice and relaxed.

- I'll be nice, relaxed, to have some wine,

cook in the kitchen, make us some yummy dinner.

- Yes.

Absolutely.

But speaking of Tuesday night, since I'll be gone.

- Do you need me to come over and watch the house?

- Well, yeah, what if you just go to--

- Tacos? - I was gonna say taco Tuesday,

what if you go grab some-- - Taco sounds great.

- Tacos.

- Yeah, we'll have a night, me and I.

Me and Ilias.

- That sounds like great, I love hanging out

with Auntie Vanessa.

- Like I said, I'm the crew on.

- You are the cool aunt.

- Well, I have the best taco spot that I can take you.

- That sounds great.

- Yeah, you'll have to leave me some in the fridge.

You know. - Yeah, we can do that.

- Yeah.

- We'll get something that, 'cause like some of their tacos,

they don't warm up so good, but we'll get you a nice--

- Maybe with some fish tacos?

- Some fish tacos, we could do that.

- I feel like I could eat this cold.

- We'll get a couple things and bring 'em back

so you can have some more. - Okay.

- No worries, we got you.

But you're driving, 'cause it's Taco Tuesday,

so I'm behind with some margaritas.

The best part about him growing up and being older now

is that I have a designated driver.

- Oh, you do.

- I do, he's right here.

I've been needing one of those for quite some time now, but.

Taco Tuesday.

- If only he had a nice car to drive you around.

- Oh, I know.

- I've been asking for a car, guys.

- I guess I can let him drive my car.

- Get a job.

- I know.

- Well, I'll let you drive my car

so you can get a little taste of what it's like

to drive a nice, new luxury car.

- Oh, Auntie Vanessa's car is so nice.

I love it.

- You know, and you don't have kids,

and all these other expenses.

You have more money to do.

You're getting more stuff with.

- Absolutely.

- So don't go having kids just yet, sir.

- You know what?

- It's a sacrifice.

It's absolutely a sacrifice.

But I was telling him that he needs to go

to some of these college parties while he still can.

- Oh, well that's a great idea.

Before you're so busy, you won't be able to.

- I could always take you.

I could always go with you.

You know I'm always the life of the party.

- I know, no, Missy.

That seems a little dangerous.

- Come on.

Auntie's so fun at parties.

- That'll be fun.

- What?

- We just went to a hotel.

- Oh, okay.

- What I don't know won't hurt me.

- Exactly.

So you just won't know all of the parties

that we're gonna go to.

- Absolutely.

I remember all the fun parties that I used to go to.

- Wow, how were they?

- I miss those college parties.

Those were the good old days.

- Centuries ago.

- Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, not centuries ago.

- Oh, she's not that old.

- It feels like centuries ago but,

feels like just last summer,

we came ploughed at those wrap parties.

- Okay, new subject.

This is not, HG. - Okay, okay.

I guess I did do those things in college.

Yes I did.

- Well, mom, what also you're supposed to do

at those crazy parties?

- Exactly.

You see, he doesn't even go to them,

and he gets, this really has been a fun week.

Spending all this-- - It's been so fun.

- Extra time with you guys.

- I loved all of it.

Red is just my color.

I can never have anything other than red.

- She does love red.

- Just doesn't work.

- I mean, you do look so good in red,

so it makes sense, you know?

- Well, that's why I wore the red dress for the graduation.

It's just, it's my favorite color.

- And you looked great in it and not like,

Mrs. Adams and her slutty dress.

- Oh, yes. - Oh gosh, let's not even

go revisit that. - I still can't believe

that she wore that there.

Like, what?

It's insane to me.

- You know, I just think she's just not in reality.

She just lives in her own world.

- That is, that's gotta be it.

- She definitely is just living in her own world, you know?

Like, it's a little alarming how much she's just in it.

- Yeah. - And I'm like, mm-hmm.

- I'm just absolutely ridiculous.

- Uh-huh, yeah.

So, can we talk about getting my car now?

- (laughs)

I thought that's what this whole week thing was about you,

like having a fun week and not getting a car.

- You know what I think we need to talk about, sweetie?

That you need some more fruits and veggies in your diet.

- Yeah.

(whooshing)

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