Original subtitles

HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU NOT TO STEAL MY PAPER?

3 MORE TIMES.

I NEED THE BUSINESS SECTION.

BERG, GIVE ME THE BUSINESS SECTION.

HEY, SHAR, DO YOU WANT THE BUSINESS SECTION?

THERE'S AN ARTICLE

ON MY DAD'S CONSTRUCTION COMPANY.

OOH! HERE IT IS, HERE IT IS.

"GREGORY CARTER." AAH! THAT'S MY DAD.

"EXPERT IN URBAN RENEWAL

WILL GIVE BOSTON'S HISTORIC THEATERS A FACELIFT."

OH, MY GOD. THERE'S A WHOLE BIOGRAPHY ON HIM.

HEY, GO, DAD.

WHERE'S MY NAME? WHERE'S MY NAME?

FAMILY... FAMILY... HERE IT IS.

"HE IS THE PROUD FATHER OF 3.

"DAUGHTER ELIZABETH IS A TOP-LEVEL EXECUTIVE AT BICKFORD CONSULTING."

AAH! THAT'S MY SISTER!

ACCORDING TO BERG, IT'S YOUR PREGNANT SISTER.

IT WAS AN HONEST MISTAKE.

SHE WAS WEARING A BAGGY SWEATER.

"SON TODD IS A SUCCESSFUL VICE PRESIDENT

AT THE BROKERAGE FIRM OF LEDERMAN AND ANTONOTTI."

OOH! THAT'S MY BROTHER!

AND HE HAS ANOTHER DAUGHTER, SHARON."

AAH! THAT'S YOU!

I LIKE IT.

IT WAS NICE AND TO THE POINT.

ELIZABETH.

TOP-LEVEL EXECUTIVE.

TODD. SUCCESSFUL VP.

AND SHARON.

WHY DIDN'T HE MENTION WHAT I DO FOR A LIVING?

WHAT FATHER WOULDN'T BE PROUD OF A DAUGHTER

WHO HAS SUCH A HIGH-LEVEL POSITION IN A COMPANY?

YOU'RE EVEN QUOTED IN THE PAPER TODAY.

"OUR CHEMICAL COMPANY DENIES ANY RESPONSIBILITY

FOR THE SUDDEN INCREASE IN 2-HEADED FISH."

OH, MY GOD. THAT'S IT.

HE'S ASHAMED OF ME.

HE REFURBISHES NEIGHBORHOODS.

I BREED CIRCUS FISH.

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.

I'VE GOT TO GET A NEW JOB.

HAVING TWINS.

TELL HER TO STOP EATING.

HI, SHARON. MR. CARTER.

HEY, PETE.

HOW YA DOIN'?

ALL RIGHT. BERG.

WE JUST CAME DOWN

TO INVITE YOU TWO TO DINNER TONIGHT

TO TOAST THE NEW DIRECTOR OF MARKETING

FOR ANNE NIVEL FASHIONS.

YOU GOT THE JOB?

DAD, I DIDN'T GET IT YET.

I'M WAITING TO HEAR.

AW, YOU GOT IT.

YOU SAID THEY LOVED YOU.

WELL... THEY DID.

REMEMBER WHEN YOU RAN FOR BROOKVILLE JUNIOR MISS?

AND YOU DIDN'T THINK YOU'D WIN THE TALENT COMPETITION.

DAD.

NO ONE WILL EVER DO THE ROBOT LIKE YOU DID.

REALLY?

YEAH. COME ON, DO IT. DO IT.

OH, GO AHEAD.

YEAH. COME ON, HONEY. COME ON.

I GOT A MEETING TO GO TO.

I'LL PICK YOU GUYS UP AT 8:00 AT THE PARLOR.

Berg: SEE YA, DAD.

I WANT TIES.

OH. MM.

LOBSTER. TIES. TIES ARE GOOD.

SEE YOU TONIGHT.

I'M SO PROUD OF YOU.

BYE, DADDY.

BYE-BYE.

DID YOU SEE THAT?

HE HASN'T GUSHED LIKE THAT SINCE I GRADUATED.

HE'S SO HAPPY I'M FINALLY GONNA BE WORKING

FOR AN ETHICAL COMPANY.

I DON'T THINK YOU'RE GIVING YOUR FATHER ENOUGH CREDIT.

I THINK HE'S JUST HAPPY 'CAUSE YOU'RE HAPPY.

WRONG.

IN MY FAMILY, YOU ARE WHAT YOU DO.

MY DAD GAVE UP

A SUCCESSFUL REAL ESTATE DEVELOPMENT COMPANY

AND COMPLETELY STARTED OVER

BECAUSE HE DIDN'T LIKE THE PEOPLE HE WAS DEALING WITH.

MY DAD EXPECTS A LOT FROM US.

GOOD THING YOU'RE NOT IN THAT FAMILY, HUH, PETE?

OH, MY GOD. OH, MY GOD.

THIS IS IT.

HELLO.

THIS IS SHE.

THANK YOU. I LOVED YOU GUYS, TOO.

WHAT?

NO, THAT'S NOT TRUE.

THERE MUST BE SOME CLERICAL ERROR.

I WILL GO DOWN THERE AND STRAIGHTEN IT OUT IMMEDIATELY.

JUST DON'T GIVE MY JOB AWAY.

THANK YOU.

WHAT'S GOING ON?

THEY WERE DOING A ROUTINE CHECK ON MY RESUME,

AND TUFTS SAID I NEVER GRADUATED.

YES, YOU DID.

YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.

LOOK. SEE?

I'M GOING OVER TO THE REGISTRAR'S OFFICE.

DO YOU WANT COMPANY?

YEAH. I'LL GET THE CAR.

YOU DON'T THINK THIS IS ABOUT...

NO, BUT I'M GONNA GO WITH HER JUST IN CASE.

SHE MUST NEVER FIND OUT

WHAT HAPPENED GRADUATION DAY.

SHE NEVER WILL.

I REALLY APPRECIATE YOU COMING WITH ME.

AW, COME ON, SHAR.

YOU KNOW YOU COME BEFORE MY BUSY SCHEDULE.

YOU'RE TAPING GENERAL HOSPITAL FOR ME, RIGHT?

YES.

WELL, I GOTTA FIND OUT IF LUKE OR STEFAN

PUSHED KATHERINE OFF THE BALCONY.

OH! THIS IS SO FRUSTRATING.

THEY SAID I WAS PERFECT FOR THAT JOB.

THAT'S WHAT THEY SAID... "PERFECT."

THEY SAID I WAS FRIENDLY AND FUN...

AND I'M GONNA TEAR THIS WOMAN'S HEAD OFF.

WHOO! WHOO! HOO!

AH, LOOK AT 'EM.

SO NAIVE,

SO UNPREPARED FOR WHAT AWAITS THEM.

WASTING 3 YEARS OF THEIR LIVES

GOING DOWN THE WRONG CAREER PATH.

ONLY TO FIND YOURSELF WORKING IN THE SAME PIZZA PLACE

FOR MINIMUM WAGE DAY AFTER DAY.

PUPPETS. YOU'RE ALL PUPPETS.

NEXT.

NAME?

SHARON CARTER.

UH, LISTEN, I HAD THIS VERY IMPORTANT

JOB INTERVIEW TODAY,

AND THEY CALLED ME UP AND TOLD ME

I NEVER GRADUATED.

WELL, LOOK AT THIS.

THEY WERE RIGHT!

YOU LEFT SCHOOL WITH UNPAID PARKING TICKETS,

AND THEY HELD YOUR DIPLOMA.

NO, NO, NO, NO. I PAID THEM.

I REMEMBER PAYING THEM.

PETE, DON'T YOU REMEMBER ME PAYING THEM?

YEAH. SHE PAID THEM.

OH, WELL, I CAN'T TELL YOU

WHAT A DIFFERENCE THAT DOESN'T MAKE.

LISTEN, I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS.

CAN I SEE A SUPERVISOR?

WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.

NOW IS NO TIME TO STAND ON PRINCIPLE, OK?

JUST PAY THEM AGAIN.

HOW BAD COULD IT BE?

OH, MY LORD.

12 TICKETS WITH INTEREST, PLUS PENALTIES.

WHATEVER. JUST TAKE CARE OF IT.

AT LEAST YOU'RE GETTING AIR LINE MILES.

NOW WE CAN ALL FLY FREE TO SATURN.

OK. YOU'RE ALL SET. JUST SIGN HERE.

CONGRATULATIONS.

YOU'RE NOW JUST 3 ENGLISH CREDITS SHY OF GRADUATION.

WHAT? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

I HAVE ENOUGH CREDITS.

NOT ANYMORE.

REQUIREMENTS HAVE CHANGED.

WELL, WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO NOW?

YOU'RE IN LUCK.

NIGHT CLASSES IN FRESHMAN ENGLISH START THIS EVENING.

I CAN'T RETAKE FRESHMAN ENGLISH AGAIN.

WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT?

UM... THAT'S REDUNDANT.

YOU DON'T NEED TO SAY "AGAIN."

WHAT?

SEE, WHEN YOU SAY "RETAKE,"

THE "AGAIN" IS IMPLIED.

WELL, I'M NOT WRONG.

WHAT HAPPENED?

LUKE PUSHED KATHERINE.

WITH SHARON NOT GRADUATING.

OH. OH, OH.

IT WAS THE PARKING TICKETS.

NO, NO, NO.

BUT SHARON THINKS THAT THE SCHOOL SCREWED UP...

AND SHE HAS TO RETAKE FRESHMAN ENGLISH.

BUT WE'RE COOL, RIGHT?

YEAH.

SHE MUST NEVER FIND OUT.

SHE NEVER WILL.

OVER THE NEXT FEW WEEKS,

YOU WILL NOT ONLY UNDERSTAND THE PARTS OF A SENTENCE,

BUT YOU'LL BE ABLE TO DIAGRAM ONE ON YOUR OWN.

ONE MORE HOUR, AND WE ARE GRADUATES.

ALL RIGHT. OK. HEY, THIS IS IT.

ALL RIGHT. LET'S GO. COME ON.

WAIT, WAIT. WAIT, WAIT.

PICTURE. PICTURE.

OH, WAIT. I NEED MY CAP.

WHAT'S IT WORTH TO YOU?

ACTUALLY, CAPS ARE FREE TODAY.

OH, GOSH. HEY. YOU GUYS DROPPED OFF

THE MONEY I GAVE YOU FOR MY PARKING TICKETS, RIGHT?

ABSOLUTELY. ALL $210 TAKEN CARE OF.

BOY, ARE THEY PAID.

THERE HAVE NEVER... THANK YOU, PETE.

WHAT DO YOU SAY WE DO THIS RIGHT, HUH?

OOH! CHAMPAGNE.

YES.

WHAT WOULD YOU DO

IF YOU WERE YOUNG AND BEAUTIFUL

AND HAD A BIG BOTTLE OF CHAMPAGNE?

YOU'D SHARE IT WITH YOUR CLOSEST FRIENDS,

AND THAT'S JUST WHAT THEY DID.

WOW. THAT'S EXPENSIVE STUFF.

HOW'D YOU GUYS AFFORD IT?

CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT SOME GIRL

ACTUALLY GAVE IT TO US?

ALL RIGHT. CHEERS.

HERE'S TO GRADUATION, OR AS I LIKE TO CALL IT...

GETTING OUT OF JAIL.

Instructor: COULD SOMEONE GIVE ME A SENTENCE

WITH A SUBJECT, A VERB, AND AN ADJECTIVE?

I'M GONNA TEAR PETE AND BERG'S HEADS

OFF THEIR SPINDLY LITTLE NECKS.

SHA-RON.

HEY, SHAR.

WHICH ONE OF YOU WANTS TO DIE FIRST?

ACTUALLY, YOU KNOW,

WE'RE GOING TO GO TOGETHER.

WE HAVE THIS SORT OF THELMA-AND-LOUISE PACT.

NO.

GRADUATION DAY.

YOU TOOK THE MONEY I GAVE YOU TO PAY FOR MY PARKING TICKETS

AND BOUGHT CHAMPAGNE. ADMIT IT.

WE WOULD NEVER DO THAT.

SOME GIRL GAVE US THAT CHAMPAGNE.

WHO?

I DON'T KNOW.

OH, YEAH. SOME GIRL YOU DON'T KNOW

GAVE YOU A $200-BOTTLE OF CHAMPAGNE?

YES. YES.

ADMIT YOU DID IT,

OR, TONIGHT AT DINNER, I'M GONNA TELL MY FATHER

THAT YOU TWO SQUANDERED THE THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS

HE SPENT TO GET ME THROUGH COLLEGE

ON A BOTTLE OF BOOZE.

WELL, I HAD TO TELL MY FATHER

I SQUANDERED THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS IN BOOZE

TO GET ME THROUGH COLLEGE.

WOULD YOU STOP IT?

THIS JOB WAS IMPORTANT TO ME.

THIS JOB WAS MINE.

AND YOU LAUGH, BUT, MEANWHILE,

I HAVE TO SIT ACROSS FROM MY FATHER AT DINNER TONIGHT

AND TELL HIM I DIDN'T GET THIS JOB

AND SEE THAT LOOK OF DISAPPOINTMENT ON HIS FACE.

HEY, SHAR, COME ON.

NO! COME ON NOTHING!

I DO EVERYTHING FOR YOU TWO,

AND I CAN'T EVEN COUNT ON YOU

TO DO ONE SIMPLE THING?

AND YOU SIT HERE

AND YOU LIE TO ME AND YOU MAKE JOKES?

I'M SICK OF IT.

I'M SICK OF YOU TWO.

I THINK SHE'S SERIOUS.

IT'S BEEN 3 YEARS. LET'S JUST TELL HER THE TRUTH.

NO, NO, NO. BERG, LOOK, WE MADE A PROMISE.

SO, WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?

THE FIRST THING I'M GONNA DO

IS PUT HER NEWSPAPER BACK UNDER HER DOOR.

ALL RIGHT. 5 MORE HOURS,

AND WE ARE GRADUATES.

HEY, GUYS.

HEY. HEY.

I NEED YOUR HELP.

I HAVE, LIKE, 800 THINGS TO DO TODAY.

PICK UP MY ROBE, SELL BACK BOOKS,

PAY MY PARKING TICKETS, GET MY NAILS DONE,

AND BE BACK HERE BY NOON TO HAVE LUNCH WITH MY DAD.

NO PROBLEM. I'LL HAVE LUNCH WITH YOUR DAD,

AND PETE WILL GET HIS NAILS DONE.

HERE.

OH, LOOK. BERG, SHARON UPPED OUR ALLOWANCE.

YIPPEE.

IT'S TO PAY FOR MY PARKING TICKETS.

WHY ARE YOU PAYING IN CASH?

'CAUSE MY CHECKS AND CREDIT CARDS

GO TO MY FATHER'S ACCOUNTANT,

AND I DON'T WANT MY DAD TO KNOW I SCREWED UP.

ALL RIGHT. WE'LL DROP IT OFF FOR YOU.

I WANTED TO SAY GOOD-BYE

TO THE CAMPUS POLICE ANYHOW.

I GOTTA RUN, BUT I WILL MEET YOU GUYS BACK HERE AFTER LUNCH,

AND WE'LL GO TO GRADUATION TOGETHER.

ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT.

THAT'S A LOT OF MONEY.

OH, YEAH.

I FORGET.

DID SHE SAY "PARKING TICKETS" OR "DOG TRACK"?

I DON'T RECALL.

WHAT DO YOU BOYS FEEL LIKE DOING?

O'MALLEY'S?

BERG, THE PRESIDENTS WANT TO HAVE COCKTAILS.

IT'S OPEN.

HI, HI, HI, HI. IT'S ME.

HEY. HEY.

GOD, I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU GUYS ARE GRADUATING.

THIS PLACE IS NOT GONNA BE THE SAME WITHOUT YOU.

WELL, THANK YOU.

HERE. A LITTLE GOING-AWAY PRESENT.

LOOK.

WHOA. OH, THIS IS EXPENSIVE STUFF.

YEAH, WELL, YOU GUYS ARE WORTH IT.

GOD, I'M GONNA MISS YOU.

WHOA.

COME HERE.

ALL RIGHT!

OK. ALL RIGHT.

WE'LL MISS YOU, TOO.

BYE-BYE.

AHH.

WHO WAS THAT?

ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA.

ALL RIGHT. COME ON, BERG,

BETTER GET THESE PARKING TICKETS TAKEN CARE OF.

YEAH. YEAH.

HANDLEBARS.

YOU CAN'T CALL "HANDLEBARS" INSIDE.

HANDLEBARS.

LOOK, I JUST DID IT AGAIN.

HELLO.

HEY, HOW YA DO... WHAT?

WHY?

WHY WHAT? WHAT WHY? WHAT?

OH, MY GOD. OH, MY GOD, WHAT?

LOOK, PETE AND I ARE ON OUR WAY.

WE'RE ON OUR WAY WHERE? JAIL.

WHICH ONE OF OUR BONEHEAD FRIENDS

GOT ARRESTED THIS TIME?

HEH HEH. SHARON'S DAD.

HI. WE'RE HERE TO BAIL OUT GREGORY CARTER.

CARTER.

WHAT'S THE CHARGE?

DRUNK IN PUBLIC.

OK. I NEED A SIGNATURE AND $200.

WELL, WE'LL USE SHARON'S MONEY.

SO WE DON'T PAY HER PARKING TICKETS.

EXCUSE ME?

OH. IT'S CAMPUS POLICE.

WAIT HERE. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

WELL, WE STILL GOT 10 EXTRA DOLLARS.

WHAT CAN WE DO WITH $10?

WE COULD BUY MR. CARTER SOME ADVIL.

RIGHT THIS WAY.

YOUR APPEARANCE DATE IS ON YOUR ARREST REPORT.

THANK YOU.

BERG, PETE, THANK YOU FOR COMING.

I DIDN'T KNOW WHO ELSE TO CALL.

NO PROBLEM.

I GUESS I HAD TOO MANY LONG ISLAND ICED TEAS

ON AN EMPTY STOMACH.

EVIDENTLY, I PASSED OUT

IN A McDONALD'S PLAYLAND.

SINCE WHEN DOES McDONALD'S SERVE LONG ISLAND ICED TEAS?

UH, MR. CARTER, IF IT'S NOT TOO RUDE TO ASK,

WE NEED TO ASK YOU FOR THE BAIL MONEY BACK.

SURE, OF COURSE. I'LL SEND YOU A CHECK TOMORROW.

ACTUALLY, WE KINDA NEED IT... NOW IN CASH.

WELL, I'M SORRY. I DON'T HAVE IT ON ME.

THERE'S AN ATM RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER.

LOOK, GUYS.

I'M IN A LITTLE BIT OF TROUBLE.

ACTUALLY, A LOT OF TROUBLE.

I'M... COMPLETELY BROKE.

WHAT? HOW?

THE BOTTOM FELL OUT OF THE REAL ESTATE MARKET.

I LOST EVERYTHING.

CREDITORS CAME AFTER ME.

THE WHOLE THING'S A MESS.

SO THAT'S WHY YOU CALLED US AND NOT SHARON.

I DIDN'T WANT HER TO KNOW.

JUST DIDN'T WANT TO SEE THAT LOOK ON HER FACE.

BUT IT'S PROBABLY TIME I TOLD HER.

NO. WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.

MR. CARTER, YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THAT.

SHE'S GONNA FIND OUT EVENTUALLY.

NOT NECESSARILY, NO.

WE LIE TO HER ALL THE TIME.

MR. CARTER, YOU JUST HIT A ROUGH SPOT.

ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS TURN THINGS AROUND.

YEAH, BUT I GOTTA START OVER FROM SCRATCH.

YOU CAN DO THAT.

SHARON SAYS YOU'RE AN AMAZING BUSINESSMAN,

AND THAT'S WHY SHE IDOLIZES YOU.

YEAH.

I GUESS I PROBABLY SHOULD AT LEAST TRY

BEFORE I TELL HER, HUH?

WHY MAKE HER FEEL ALL UPSET

IF I DON'T HAVE TO?

I MEAN, THE DRINKING SURE ISN'T WORKING.

NO, IT SURE ISN'T.

SO...

THIS WILL JUST STAY BETWEEN US?

IT'S JUST BETWEEN US.

WE PROMISE, NO MATTER WHAT.

THANKS.

YOU'RE MEETING SHARON FOR LUNCH IN 15 MINUTES.

HANDLEBARS.

YOU CAN'T CALL "HANDLEBARS" INSIDE.

ONE MORE HOUR, AND WE ARE GRADUATES.

ALL RIGHT. OK. HEY, THIS IS IT.

ALL RIGHT. LET'S GO. COME ON.

WAIT, WAIT. WAIT, WAIT.

PICTURE. PICTURE.

OH, WAIT. I NEED MY CAP.

WHAT'S IT WORTH TO YOU?

ACTUALLY, CAPS ARE FREE TODAY.

OH, GOSH. HEY. YOU GUYS DROPPED OFF

THE MONEY I GAVE YOU FOR MY PARKING TICKETS, RIGHT?

ABSOLUTELY. ALL $210 TAKEN CARE OF.

BOY, ARE THEY PAID.

THERE HAVE NEVER... THANK YOU, PETE.

WHAT DO YOU SAY WE DO THIS RIGHT, HUH?

OOH! CHAMPAGNE.

YES.

WHAT WOULD YOU DO

IF YOU WERE YOUNG AND BEAUTIFUL

AND HAD A BIG BOTTLE OF CHAMPAGNE?

YOU'D SHARE IT WITH YOUR CLOSEST FRIENDS,

AND THAT'S JUST WHAT THEY DID.

WOW. THAT'S EXPENSIVE STUFF.

HOW'D YOU GUYS AFFORD IT?

CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT SOME GIRL

ACTUALLY GAVE IT TO US?

ALL RIGHT. CHEERS.

HERE'S TO GRADUATION, OR AS I LIKE TO CALL IT...

GETTING OUT OF JAIL.

PERFECT.

OK. UH, LET'S GO GRADUATE.

OH, I'M SO GLAD YOU'RE HERE, DADDY.

I COULD NEVER HAVE DONE ANY OF THIS WITHOUT YOU.

SO, ANYWAY, DAD,

AFTER I FINISH THIS STUPID CLASS,

THERE'S A POSSIBILITY

THAT THERE STILL MIGHT BE A JOB FOR ME AT ANNE NIVEL.

I HATE PETE AND BERG.

LISTEN, HONEY, IF THERE'S ONE THING I'VE LEARNED,

IT'S THAT JOBS COME AND GO.

BUT YOUR FRIENDS WILL GET YOU THROUGH THE ROUGH TIMES.

YEAH, BUT THEY'RE THE CAUSE OF MY ROUGH TIMES.

THIS JOB WAS IMPORTANT.

I DON'T WANT YOU TO BE ASHAMED OF ME ANYMORE.

WHAT?

WHY DIDN'T YOU MENTION ME IN THE ARTICLE YESTERDAY?

I MENTIONED YOU.

YEAH, BUT YOU MENTIONED WHAT TODD AND LIZ DO FOR A LIVING.

AND ME... NOTHING.

REALLY?

ADMIT IT.

YOU HATE MY JOB.

HONEY, I DON'T... YEAH, I DO HATE YOUR JOB.

BUT I LOVE YOU.

I KNOW YOU LOVE ME,

BUT I WANT YOU TO BE AS PROUD OF ME

AS I AM OF YOU.

SHARON, LISTEN TO ME.

Berg: HI, SHARON.

NO.

MR. CARTER, CAN WE TALK TO YOU FOR A SEC?

I CAN'T BELIEVE SHE DIDN'T GET THAT JOB BECAUSE OF ME.

WE WERE TALKING, AND WE JUST WANNA LET YOU KNOW

THAT NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS BETWEEN SHARON AND US,

WE'RE NEVER GONNA TELL HER ANYTHING.

JUST GIVE IT A FEW WEEKS.

WE'LL DO SOMETHING WORSE,

AND SHE'LL FORGET ALL ABOUT IT.

THANKS, GUYS,

BUT I THINK IT'S TIME SHARON AND I HAD AN HONEST TALK

ABOUT WHAT REALLY HAPPENED.

YOU'RE GOING TO TELL HER EVERYTHING?

YEAH. I OWE IT TO HER,

AND I OWE IT TO YOU GUYS.

YOU ALL SET, HONEY?

YEAH.

SHARON, IF IT'S OK WITH YOU,

I THINK WE SHOULD GO TO DINNER ALONE.

GOOD.

SHE IS GOING TO FEEL SO BAD.

OH, YEAH.

WE MUST NEVER LET HER LIVE THIS DOWN.

WE NEVER WILL.

I FEEL SO BAD. I REALLY DO.

WE KNOW.

AND WE'VE COMPLIED A LIST OF THINGS YOU CAN DO

TO MAKE IT UP TO US.

"ONE... A 6-PACK OF BEER..."

IMPORTED...

"DELIVERED TO OUR FRIDGE ONCE A WEEK."

UH, 2. I LIKE THIS ONE.

"YOUR FIRSTBORN, REGARDLESS OF SEX,

SHALL BE NAMED ELVIS."

"3... TELL JOHNNY NO STOMPING AROUND IN WORK BOOTS

BEFORE 8 A.M."

YEAH. EVER SINCE HE'S MOVED IN WITH YOU,

WE HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO GET A WINK OF SLEEP.

JOHNNY LIVES WITH YOU?

I FORGOT TO MENTION THAT.

I THINK WE HAVE A FEW MORE THINGS TO DISCUSS.

SEE YOU UPSTAIRS.

OOPS.

OW!

I HATE YOU GUYS.