Original subtitles

PREVIOUSLY ON THE L WORD...

WHO DID THIS TO YOU? IT DOESN'T MATTER.

NO, TELL ME. I WILL FUCKING KILL THEM.

WHO DID THIS TO YOU?

YOU DID IT.

LOOK, I NEED SOMEBODY

WHO LOOKS RELATIVELY HUMAN,

OR AT LEAST IS A CREDIBLE SIMULATION,

AND THAT'S WHERE HAIR GIRL COMES IN.

FUCK YOU.

WE'VE BEEN BEST FRIENDS FOR HOW LONG, HUH?

AND NOW YOU'RE GOING TO FUCK UP THIS GIG

WE'VE BEEN WORKING OUR ASSES OFF ON

FOR SOME CHICK?

WE'RE WATCHING

A BURR CONNOR FILM FESTIVAL.

YES, MISS JENNY OVER HERE

IS GOING TO GHOSTWRITE

HIS MEMOIRS.

ARE YOU FIRING ME

BECAUSE I'M GAY?

WELL, I WASN'T AWARE THAT I'D ACTUALLY HIRED YOU.

IT GETS KIND OF LONELY ON THE ROAD SOMETIMES.

YOU MUST MISS YOUR FAMILY.

[GIGGLES]

WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING?

THEY'VE BEEN HAVING SEX ALL WEEKEND.

HI. HI. HEY.

MY NEXT SONOGRAM

IS WEDNESDAY THE 7th AT 10:00 A.M.

WELL, I'D LOVE TO BE THERE.

I MEAN, IF THAT'S OKAY WITH YOU.

YEAH.

I'D REALLY LIKE TO SEE OUR BABY.

[WATER RUNNING]

[CARMEN]: WELL, I HAVE TO PEE, TOO.

[JENNY]: I'M GOING TO BE DONE IN A SEC.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

I WANT YOU TO SPREAD YOUR LEGS.

[LIQUID TRICKLES]

[GASPS]

OH, MY GOD.

OH, FUCK.

THESE GIRLS ARE TAKING FUCKING FOREVER.

ARE YOU OKAY?

I'M DYING.

HEY, GUYS, COME ON.

LET MARK IN. HE HAS TO GO.

DO YOU FEEL THAT?

COME ON, GUYS.

HIS BACK TEETH ARE FLOATING.

BE NICE.

FUCK IT.

OH.

USE THE BUSHES.

FUCK.

HEY, I'M MARK WAYLAND,

AND I LIVE IN A HOUSE WITH TWO LESBIANS.

MY NAME IS JENNY SCHECTER.

I'M SHANE.

AND THIS WILL BE A DOCUMENT OF MY JOURNEY.

INITIAL OBSERVATIONS AND THEORIES.

AND WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THAT LESBIANS DON'T FUCK?

WHERE DO YOU LIVE, MARK?

IT'S ENTIRELY POSSIBLE.

I'M DANA FAIRBANKS.

I THOUGHT IT WOULD TOTALLY RUIN MY CAREER,

BUT IT DIDN'T.

PEOPLE THANKED ME.

THESE GIRLS TALK ABOUT EVERYTHING.

MY NAME IS CARMEN DE LA PICA MORALES.

I WAS 16 BACK THEN,

AND I FELL MADLY IN LOVE WITH LUCIA TORRES.

SHE WAS PABLO FUENTES' GIRLFRIEND.

YOU JUST, YOU DIDN'T FUCK WITH PABLO'S GIRL...

BUT I DID.

THIS IS ALICE, UH...

PIE... PIESZECKI.

I DON'T MISS IT.

NO, THERE'S WAYS AND THINGS.

[MARK]: I DON'T KNOW IF THAT'S, LIKE,

STRICTLY A LESBIAN THING OR WHAT,

BUT MAN, THESE GIRLS ARE ALL UP ON ONE ANOTHER'S BUSINESS.

THIS IS SO MUCH MORE COMPLICATED THAN THAT.

[MARK]: NOW, I KNOW...

YEAH, YEAH, WHERE'S THE FUCKING PUSSY?

LOOK, THE HIDDEN CAMERAS ARE STILL IN PLACE,

SO I CAN GET MORE FOOTAGE, BUT...

I MEAN, ALREADY WHAT I'VE SHOWN YOU HERE

IS A BIG STEP UP

FROM BARE-KNUCKLE BACKYARD BRAWLS

AND WILD WOMEN OF ENCINO.

THIS COULD BE REALLY HUGE FOR US.

WHAT'S GREAT ABOUT THIS PROJECT

IS IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT SEX.

THESE WOMEN, THEY HAVE A WAY OF LIFE,

A CULTURE OF THEIR OWN,

AND IT'S REVELATORY.

IT'S ANTHROPOLOGICAL.

IF WE JUST... IF WE DO THIS RIGHT,

THIS COULD SO EASILY BE AT SUNDANCE.

I'M PRAYING TO GOD YOU'RE FUCKING KIDDING.

GOMEY, MAN, GET MY BACK.

YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS TO ME.

YEAH, I DO.

EAT A DICK.

LOOK.

JUST FROM A MARKETING PERSPECTIVE...

LISTEN TO ME, WAYLAND.

I'M THE MARKETER, OKAY?

I KNOW OUR AUDIENCE.

MEN, RED BLOODED,

TESTOSTERONE-CRAZED AMERICAN MEN

DO NOT GIVE A FUCK

ABOUT SOME KIND OF ANTHROPOLOGICAL BULLSHIT.

WE WANT HOT LESBIAN SEX, AND WE WANT IT NOW.

YOU'RE IN DIRECT VIOLATION OF YOUR CONTRACT, OKAY,

AND I EXPECT YOU TO RETURN EVERY PENNY

OF THE MONEY I ADVANCED YOU.

YOU HEAR WHAT I'M SAYING?

SO HAVE YOU THOUGHT ABOUT IT?

HAVE I THOUGHT ABOUT WHAT?

[BOTH GIGGLE]

ABOUT WHAT WE TALKED ABOUT.

THE TOYS.

OH, YOU MEAN THE SEX TOYS.

MM-HMM.

CAN I ASK YOU SOMETHING?

YEAH,

ASK AWAY.

IS IT A BISEXUAL THING?

YOU TRYING TO HAVE YOUR CAKE AND EAT YOUR PUSSY, TOO?

NO, IT'S NOT A BISEXUAL THING.

OKAY, GOOD,

BECAUSE, WAIT,

I DON'T WANT TO DO THAT WITH YOU.

I MEAN, IF YOU'RE TRYING TO MAKE ME INTO A MAN

BECAUSE YOU THINK THAT THERE'S SOMETHING MISSING

THEN I WANT YOU TO GO AHEAD... DANA,

MANY BONA FIDE LESBIANS FIND STRAPPING IT ON

THE ULTIMATE WAY OF FUCKING.

AND I THINK IT WOULD BE REALLY HOT

FOR YOU TO FUCK ME LIKE THAT.

OKAY?

[HELENA]: HOW DOES IT COMPARE, HMM?

PRIVATE EDUCATION, TRAVEL,

FASCINATING LIFE EXPERIENCES...

I JUST DON'T SEE

HOW YOU ENVISION ANY JUDGE OR JURY

FINDING YOU THE SUPERIOR CHOICE.

AS YOU WISH.

HEY.

HOW ARE WE THIS MORNING?

I'M GOOD.

I'M EXCITED ABOUT THE ULTRASOUND THIS AFTERNOON.

THAT'S RIGHT.

WELL, JUST TELL ME A TIME.

I'LL SWING BY THE OFFICE AND PICK YOU UP.

I'M GOING WITH BETTE, REMEMBER?

OH, THAT'S RIGHT.

OKAY, SO WHY DON'T YOU JUST COME BY HERE AFTERWARDS.

YEAH?

WELL, DR. WILSON'S OFFICE IS SO CLOSE TO MY APARTMENT.

WHY DON'T YOU JUST COME TO ME?

HELENA...

LOOK, IT'S FINE, YOU KNOW?

I'LL, UM...

I'LL CALL YOU WHEN I'M ON MY WAY OVER.

WE'LL GO OUT FOR DINNER.

OKAY?

ANNIE WANTS TO SHOOT HER OLD-HOLLYWOOD STYLE,

AFTER LOUIS B. MAYER, SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

THEN YOU'RE GOING TO GET HER READY

FOR HER LUNCH MEETING AT THE GRILL

WITH THE WRITER OF HER NEXT FEATURE.

DO YOU MIND TELLING ME WHO THIS IS?

THE WRITER?

NO, THE PERSON WHO HIRED ME.

I WANT TO KNOW WHO IT IS.

THE STORY'S ABOUT THE MOST POWERFUL WOMAN

IN HOLLYWOOD.

[WOMAN]: YOU ARE BRILLIANT.

I FUCKING LOVE THAT IDEA!

I FUCKING LOVE YOU.

I WANT TO FRENCH-KISS YOU,

AND IF YOU WEREN'T SUCH A FAGGOT,

I'D FUCK YOU.

WHEN IS BENJAMIN COMING IN?

HE'S GOING TO CHECK IN AT THE HOTEL,

THEN HEAD OVER HERE.

SO HE'S NOT STAYING WITH YOU?

UM... BECAUSE HIS WIFE...

IT'S NOT LIKE

SHE'S GOING TO FIND OUT,

BUT HE'S JUST...

WHAT?

I JUST DON'T WANT YOU TO GET HURT.

I'M NOT GOING TO GET HURT.

I KNEW GOING IN WHAT THE DEAL WAS,

AND I'M FINE WITH THAT.

YOU THINK I'M A FUCK-UP, DON'T YOU?

NO, I DO NOT. YES, YOU DO.

I DO NOT THINK YOU'RE A FUCK-UP.

I DON'T.

I THINK YOU'RE AMAZING.

I SEE HOW YOU'VE TURNED YOUR LIFE AROUND,

AND REALLY, I'M IN AWE

OF HOW TOGETHER YOU ARE THESE DAYS.

I JUST KNOW THE SITUATION,

AND NO MATTER WHAT,

I MEAN, THERE'S ALWAYS SOMEONE WHO GETS HURT,

AND I JUST DON'T WANT IT TO BE YOU.

HE'S NOT ON TOUR NOW.

HE'S JUST COMING TO SEE ME.

WELL, HE'S OBVIOUSLY CRAZY ABOUT YOU.

I'M PREPARING

THIS VERY SPECIAL DINNER FOR HIM.

LARA HAS ORDERED LOBSTERS FROM MAINE.

BENJAMIN LOVES HIM SOME LOBSTER.

[CHUCKLES]

WELL, YOU JUST...

YOU LOOK OUT AFTER YOURSELF, OKAY?

I LOVE YOU.

OH, WOULD YOU BRING ME BACK

ONE OF THOSE X-RAY PICTURES OF THE BABY?

PLEASE?

OKAY.

I LOVE YOU.

THANKS FOR BREAKFAST.

YOU'RE WELCOME.

COVER OF THE NEW YORK TIMES MAGAZINE.

[LAUGHS]

PRETTY GOOD, HUH, SHANE?

YEAH, IT'S PRETTY GREAT.

I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU REQUESTED ME, THOUGH.

YOU DO HAIR, DON'T YOU?

APPARENTLY

THAT'S YOUR LIFE'S AMBITION.

DON'T FUCK WITH ME, VERONICA.

HOW AM I FUCKING WITH YOU

WHEN I OFFER YOU THE WORLD ON A SILVER PLATTER?

WHAT'S SO WRONG

WITH SEEING THE POTENTIAL IN SOMEBODY

AND GIVING THEM A CHANCE

TO MAKE SOMETHING OF THEMSELVES?

DID I UNDERESTIMATE YOU, SHANE,

OR DID I JUST MISTAKE YOU FOR A PERSON OF SUBSTANCE?

NO.

I THINK YOU MISTOOK ME FOR ONE OF YOUR LITTLE TRICKS

WHO WOULD LET YOU SLAP HER AROUND

AND BE GRATEFUL FOR THE PRIVILEGE

OF TAKING YOUR SHIT.

ARE WE GETTING TO SOME CORE ISSUES, SHANE?

POOR SHANE.

FUCK YOU.

WHAT ABOUT THE POSSIBILITY THAT I'M RIGHT

ABOUT YOU?

THAT YOU REALLY ARE BETTER THAN THIS LIFE YOU'RE LIVING?

VERONICA,

LISTEN TO WHAT I'M SAYING TO YOU.

I HAVE NO MAGIC,

AND THERE IS NO MOJO,

THAT YOU THINK YOU'RE LOOKING FOR,

IT DOESN'T EXIST.

OKAY?

THEN WHY DON'T YOU DO MY FUCKING HAIR?

NO, THANK YOU.

HELLO.

BURR WILL BE HERE IN A MINUTE.

HAVE A SEAT.

I'D THOUGHT THAT HE'D FIRED ME.

I WOULDN'T LET HIM.

YOU'RE TOO GOOD FOR ONE ANOTHER.

ANOTHER DRINK.

MORE TWIST, LESS ICE.

CAN I HAVE A CHARDONNAY, PLEASE?

YOU ARE A COMPULSIVE EXCAVATOR

OF YOUR OWN EMOTIONAL NAVEL LINT,

A NIT-PICKING OBSESSIVE TRUTH-TELLER,

AND BURR COULD STAND A BIT OF LITERARY PEDICULOSIS.

EW.

HMM.

DOES THAT HIT A LITTLE TOO CLOSE TO HOME?

ARE WE SELF-LOATHING, BODY MUTILATORS AS WELL?

OF COURSE.

I CAN'T WAIT TO READ ABOUT THAT

IN ONE OF YOUR STORIES.

I HOPE YOU'RE NOT A CUTTER.

LISTEN, JENNY.

YOU ACTUALLY HAVE A GIFT

TO PORTRAY THE DETAILS OF A LIFE LIVED.

I THINK NON-FICTION MAY END UP BEING YOUR METIER.

IT'S WHY I WANT YOU TO WORK WITH BURR.

I DON'T WANT TO.

YOU NEED TO GET HIM TO TELL YOU STORIES.

I DON'T LIKE HIM.

HE'S A HOMOPHOBE.

[BURR]: HI.

HI. HI, DARLING.

HOW ARE YOU?

GOOD. HOW ARE YOU? GOOD.

HELLO.

YOU REMEMBER JENNY SCHECTER.

I DO.

APPARENTLY

WE'RE DESTINED FOR ONE ANOTHER.

THANK YOU, SUZIE.

ALL RIGHT, WHAT DO YOU THINK?

[WOMAN]: WELL, HERE'S A GOOD WAY

TO THINK ABOUT IT.

AN INCH IN DIAMETER IS TWO FINGERS INSIDE OF YOU.

AN INCH AND A HALF

IS THREE FINGERS INSIDE OF YOU.

THE SILICONE ONES ARE EASIEST TO STERILIZE,

AND SO YOU CAN SHARE.

SHARE. HOW DO YOU STERILIZE THEM?

BUT DON'T FORGET TO TAKE IT OUT BEFORE THE MAID COMES.

OH, LOOK, THIS LOOKS FUN.

OH, NOW, THAT'S VERY POPULAR.

EVERYONE'S A WINNER.

NO?

YEAH, I KIND OF WANT YOU TO...

YEAH. YOU KNOW? ANYWAY.

I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE TO START.

THERE ARE SO MANY SHAPES, SIZES...

WELL, ARE YOU INTO SEMI-REALISTIC, REALISTIC?

THESE ONES HERE,

CHAMPLETTE, LEO, AND RANDY,

ARE ALL THE SEMIS,

AND UP HERE, KING KONG AND TYRANNOSAURUS REX.

THESE ARE VERY LIKE THE REAL THING,

AND THEY COME IN COLORS.

THERE'S BLACK, PURPLE, BLUE, TEAL, RED,

HOT PINK, CHOCOLATE, AND VANILLA.

THERE'S COMBINATION MARBLE-SWIRL.

THERE'S DISCO GLITTER,

AND KING KONG AND TYRANNOSAURUS REX

BOTH COME IN CAMOUFLAGE.

IN CASE YOU'RE SCREWING IN A WAR ZONE.

OH, LOOK!

HAIRY BALLS.

OH, THAT'S JUST WRONG.

IF YOU LOOK AT THE BASE,

THEY COME WITH A SUCTION CUP,

AND THAT WAY IT MAKES THEM EASY TO ATTACH

TO THE HOTEL WINDOW.

OH, LOOK.

[SWAGGERING]: HEY.

NO, THAT'S A BUTT PLUG.

THE BOYS LIKE THOSE,

BECAUSE THEY GET RIGHT INSIDE

AND TICKLE THE PROSTATE.

ALTHOUGH THE GIRLS DO LIKE THEM, TOO.

IF YOU USE IT WITH A HARNESS,

YOU CAN DETACH THE DILDO,

LEAVE THE BUTT PLUG INSIDE WHILE YOU DO OTHER THINGS.

WHAT, LIKE, THE DISHES?

BY THE WAY,

WE HAVE A GREAT NEW LUBE.

IT JUST CAME IN TODAY.

I HIGHLY RECOMMEND THIS.

OH, YOU KNOW,

I THINK I'M ALLERGIC TO THAT KIND, SO...

STRAWBERRIES. WHAT?

WHAT HAVEN'T YOU DONE?

I HAVEN'T DONE LOTS OF THINGS.

IF YOU NEED ANY HELP, JUST GIVE ME A SHOUT.

OH, SHIT.

IT'S MELANIE CAPLAN.

[PULLS ZIPPER]

SO?

SO...

WHY DON'T WE GET A COCK RING?

IS THAT OUR BABY?

THAT'S YOUR BABY,

AND THOSE ARE HER FINGERS.

VERY WELL FORMED, YEAH.

ISN'T SHE AMAZING?

OH, IT'S LIKE SHE'S WAVING AT US.

LOOK.

SHE'S SHOWING YOU HER PROFILE.

[BURR]: SO I GUESS I'M BEING DRAGGED,

KICKING AND SCREAMING, TO A PLACE OF TOLERANCE.

I DON'T REALLY LIKE THE IDEA OF BEING TOLERATED.

WHAT'S WRONG WITH BEING TOLERATED, JENNY?

IT'S BETTER THAN BEING SPAT ON.

THAT THERE'S SOMETHING UNACCEPTABLE

ABOUT MY BEING GAY.

FRANKLY,

I THINK IT'S PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE

FOR A GIRL THESE DAYS.

MEN ACTUALLY FIND IT HOT.

WHAT'S WITH THE DOUBLE STANDARD, BURR?

OH, DON'T BE A PRICK, CHARLOTTE.

LOOK AT ANY MALE ACTOR TODAY.

THERE'S NOT A SELF-PROCLAIMED QUEER

IN THE BUNCH.

PLEASE, DOES ANYBODY GIVE A SHIT ANYMORE?

THEY GIVE A SHIT.

DO YOU HONESTLY THINK

A STUDIO'S GOING TO PAY A GUY WHAT THEY PAY ME

IF HIS FANS THINK HE'S A FAGGOT?

ALL THE MILLIONS YOU'VE COLLECTED OVER THE YEARS,

WHAT HAVE YOU GOT TO LOSE?

I WAS SPEAKING HYPOTHETICALLY, DARLING.

WE'RE NOT REALLY TALKING ABOUT ME.

OH, I THOUGHT WE WERE.

DON'T TWIST MY WORDS, CHARLOTTE.

I KNOW YOU TAKE PLEASURE IN IT, BUT BE WARNED, SWEETHEART.

DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY LAWSUITS I'VE WON

AGAINST PEOPLE WHO'VE TRIED TO ACCUSE ME

OF WHAT YOU JUST ACCUSED ME OF?

ARE YOU THREATENING ME?

I THINK YOU MIGHT WANT

TO ORGANIZE YOUR FRIENDS

TO FORM A LITTLE LEGAL DEFENSE FUND

FOR THEIR BELOVED PROFESSOR.

FUCK OFF, CHARLOTTE.

HEY.

HEY.

I WANT TO TELL YOU

THAT I AGREE WITH WHAT YOU SAID, MAN.

YOU DO, HUH?

I DO.

BECAUSE THE THING IS,

IF SOME MALE ACTOR WERE TO COME OUT

AND SAY, "FUCK, YEAH. I'M GAY,"

THAT WOULD BE, LIKE, A HUGE GIFT TO THE WORLD,

BUT IT WOULD DESTROY THEIR FUCKING CAREER.

EXACTLY RIGHT.

AND DON'T WORRY ABOUT CHARLOTTE, YOU KNOW?

SHE'S AN ASSHOLE.

SHE'S NOT GOD, YOU KNOW?

I WOULDN'T BE SO SURE ABOUT THAT, JENNY.

[LAUGHS]

JENNY, IF YOU STILL FEEL LIKE WORKING ON THE BOOK,

BE AT MY HOUSE TOMORROW NIGHT AT 8:30.

THANK YO

THAT WAS REALLY NICE.

THANK YOU.

I REALLY LOVED BEING THERE WITH YOU.

I LOVED IT MORE THAN YOU CAN IMAGINE.

COME HERE.

YOU FEEL SO GOOD.

YOU SMELL GOOD.

[♪♪♪]

TOUCH ME HERE.

FEEL THIS.

TOUCH ME HERE.

OH, MY GOD.

OH, MY FUCKING GOD.

ARE YOU SURE IT'S OKAY?

[GASPING]

I DON'T KNOW, BABE.

I THINK IT LOOKS LITTLE DYKE-ISH.

WELCOME TO THE CLUB.

[CHUCKLES]

I'M JOKING. I LIKE IT A LOT.

SO, WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK THAT BITCH WANTED FROM YOU?

OH, I DON'T KNOW.

SHE'S A FUCKING FREAK.

DAMN, YOU KNOW,

I WAS JUST ABOUT TO ASK YOU TO HOOK IT UP.

YOU WERE GOING TO ASK ME TO CALL VERONICA BLOOM?

I HAD A MINUTE OF THINKING

IF SHE SAW MY PROJECT, SHE MIGHT BE INTO IT.

MARK, WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY SOMETHING?

NO, IT WAS JUST A FLEETING THOUGHT.

DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.

DO YOU HAVE ANY OTHER LEADS?

UH, NO.

NO? MM-MM.

WELL, LOOK, MAYBE I...

MAYBE I'LL GET ANOTHER JOB WITH A STUDIO HEAD

OR MAYBE I ACTUALLY WILL HAVE A NEXT JOB.

YEAH, YOU AND ME BOTH.

[KNOCKING]

YEAH?

HEY.

HEY.

HI.

JENNY'S AT WORK.

YEAH, SHE'S WAITRESSING.

YEAH.

SO, UH...

OH, UM, I JUST WANTED

TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT SOME STUFF, UM...

YOU'RE CUTTING HAIR.

YES, I AM.

YOU KNOW WHAT?

I HAVE GOT A TON OF WORK I NEED TO BE DOING RIGHT NOW.

UM, I'LL CLEAN THIS UP WHEN I...

NO, I HAVE IT. I HAVE IT.

NO, I GOT IT.

OKAY.

HEY.

HI.

HOW ARE YOU?

THANK YOU.

YEAH.

WHAT'S UP?

[HEART BEATING]

[HEARTBEAT RATE INCREASES]

SHANE. IT'S...

I FEEL LIKE

THERE'S SOMETHING GOING ON WITH YOU,

AND I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW WHAT IT IS.

LOOK, I JUST...

[SIGHS]

OH, FUCK, YOU KNOW, IT'S...

IT'S HARD FOR ME

TO HAVE YOU AND JENNY IN MY FACE ALL THE TIME.

YOU'RE HAVING A HARD TIME WITH IT?

I'M HAPPY FOR YOU GUYS.

IT LOOKS LIKE YOU TWO ARE HAVING A BLAST TOGETHER.

THAT'S A VERY GOOD THING.

THEN WHY WOULD IT BE SO HARD FOR YOU?

NOW, SHANE,

I WANT YOU TO LOOK AT ME.

I KNOW HOW HARD YOU WORK

TO KEEP YOURSELF AT A DISTANCE

FROM EVERYONE ELSE ON THE PLANET,

BUT IT'S NOT WORKING FOR YOU ANYMORE.

IT'S WORKING FINE.

NO, IT'S NOT.

IT'S NOT, BECAUSE OF THIS.

OKAY?

DO YOU FEEL THIS?

MOST PEOPLE DON'T HAVE THIS.

THIS IS RARE.

SO WHAT?

THAT'S RIGHT.

SO WHAT?

SO WHAT, IF NOTHING EVER COMES OUT OF THIS?

SO WHAT, IF YOU'LL NEVER ACT ON IT?

YOU ARE SO CONVINCED

THAT HAVING A RELATIONSHIP NEAR YOU

IS GOING TO KILL YOU.

BECAUSE IT WILL.

AND THAT'S WHY I'M WITH JENNY.

IT WORKS BECAUSE SHE AND I

ARE BOTH BIDING OUR TIME,

WAITING FOR THE REAL DEAL TO COME ALONG.

YEAH.

YOU DON'T THINK YOU AND JENNY ARE THE REAL DEAL?

NO.

JENNY WOULDN'T KNOW WHAT THE REAL DEAL WAS

IF IT BIT HER IN THE ASS.

SHE IS SO LOST IN HER OWN DARKNESS.

I THINK SHE LIKES IT IN THERE.

[HEARTBEAT POUNDING]

BUT DO YOU KNOW WHAT'S FUCKED UP?

IS THAT YOU AND I KNOW WHAT THE REAL DEAL IS.

WE SAW IT THE FIRST TIME WE LAID EYES ON EACH OTHER.

BETTE, I JUST WANTED TO TELL YOU THAT...

I KNOW.

I KNOW.

THIS DOESN'T MEAN WE'RE BACK TOGETHER.

I KNOW.

LET'S NOT LET IT MESS EVERYTHING UP.

IT WON'T.

I PROMISE.

WE'RE DOING GREAT.

YEAH, GREAT.

OKAY.

OKAY.

BYE.

BYE.

YOU'RE NOT LIVING YOUR LIFE, SHANE...

AND IF YOU DON'T TAKE ANY RISKS...

THEN YOU MIGHT AS WELL BE DEAD.

FUCK ME.

HI.

HEY, UM, COME IN.

ARE YOU...

YOU'RE NOT READY TO GO?

DO YOU MIND

IF WE JUST STAYED HERE TONIGHT AND ORDERED IN?

I JUST... I DON'T FEEL LIKE BEING OUT IN PUBLIC.

WELL, WE COULD GO BACK TO MY PLACE.

IS THERE A PROBLEM WITH STAYING HERE?

NO. NO, THERE'S...

NO PROBLEM.

GOOD.

YEAH.

[CHUCKLES]

ARE YOU HAVING

SOME KIND OF HORMONAL SURGE HERE?

FUCK YOU.

THAT IS WHAT YOU SEEM TO WANT.

IT IS, ACTUALLY.

MM-HMM?

YEAH.

I JUST WANT TO FUCK ALL NIGHT,

AND I WANT TO FUCK AND FUCK AND FUCK

AND FUCK AND FUCK.

OH, OKAY.

NO, NO, YOU KNOW,

I'M NOT SO SURE THAT I LIKE THIS.

I DON'T THINK I LIKE THIS.

WHY NOT?

BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT ACTING LIKE YOURSELF,

AND I'M NOT SURE THAT I LIKE IT.

OH, I SEE.

IS IT MY APARTMENT?

IS IT JUST TOO ORDINARY FOR YOU?

OR, YOU KNOW, MAYBE

IT'S THAT YOU NEED TO BE IN CONTROL ALL THE TIME.

OR MAYBE YOU NEED AN AUDIENCE.

THAT'S IT.

I DON'T THINK YOU'RE INTERESTED IN SEX

UNLESS THERE'S SOME SORT OF RISK

OR SOMEONE'S WATCHING OR SOMETHING ELSE IS GOING ON.

HERE WE GO.

HEY, WE'RE ABOUT TO HAVE SEX.

YOU WANT TO COME IN AND WATCH?

TINA, YOUR NEIGHBORS.

MY NEIGHBORS!

THAT IS A... THAT IS A WONDERFUL IDEA!

YOU ARE SO FUCKING HOT.

HEY, WE'RE ABOUT TO HAVE SEX, ME AND MY GIRLFRIEND.

DO YOU WANT TO COME DOWN HERE AND WATCH US?

WE'RE JUST GOING TO FUCK!

HAVE YOU GONE MAD?

I DON'T KNOW.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

WHAT DO YOU THINK? THAT I'M FUCKING CRAZY?

WHAT, ARE YOU TURNED ON?

NO, I THINK YOUR HORMONES ARE RAGING OUT OF CONTROL,

AND I THINK I KNOW BETTER

THAN TO REASON WITH YOU.

WHAT, I'M NOT ALLOWED TO HAVE ACTUAL FEELINGS NOW?

TINA, I'VE BEEN THROUGH THIS BEFORE.

WINNIE WAS A MONSTER

AT THIS STAGE IN HER PREGNANCY.

YEAH, AND LOOK AT YOU AND WINNIE NOW.

YOU KNOW, I THINK I'M GOING TO GO NOW.

I'M GOING TO CALL YOU TOMORROW.

NO.

NO, I NEED YOU NOW.

I NEED YOU TONIGHT.

STAY HERE.

I DON'T THINK SO.

I THINK YOU NEED TO BE ALONE.

YOU NEED TO BE ALONE, OKAY?

WHAT AM I DOING?

[BETTE]: I DON'T KNOW HOW IT HAPPENED.

I DON'T KNOW.

I MEAN, WE WERE WORKING SO HARD

AT FORGING THIS FRIENDSHIP.

DO YOU THINK I FUCKED IT UP

BY HAVING SEX WITH HER?

DO YOU THINK YOU FUCKED IT UP?

I DON'T KNOW.

WHAT DID IT MEAN?

I DON'T THINK SHE WANTS TO GET BACK TOGETHER WITH ME.

DO YOU WANT TO BE BACK TOGETHER WITH HER?

I DON'T KNOW.

HOW DID IT FEEL, HAVING SEX WITH HER?

IT WAS FUCKING AMAZING.

IT WAS JUST FUCKING... AMAZING.

IT WAS LIKE ALL OF THE REASONS THAT WE FELL APART

JUST DISAPPEARED,

AND IT WAS LIKE I HAD...

IT WAS LIKE I HAD MY LIFE BACK FOR JUST ONE SECOND...

AND IT WAS ALSO REALLY SAD.

SAD. HOW SO?

BECAUSE I'VE LOST HER.

BECAUSE WE DON'T...

WELL, LIKE, SHE DOESN'T BELONG TO ME ANYMORE.

LIKE, I COULD FEEL SOMEONE ELSE HAD BEEN TOUCHING HER

AND MAKING LOVE TO HER,

AND I FELT THAT OTHER PERSON,

AND I FELT HER CONNECTION TO THAT OTHER PERSON, YOU KNOW?

AND SHE DID THINGS THAT WE HAD NEVER DONE TOGETHER,

AND IT WAS LIKE SHE WAS SO... FREE.

FREE.

YEAH.

I MEAN, I HAD ALWAYS TREATED HER SO GINGERLY,

YOU KNOW, LIKE SHE WAS SOME KIND OF FRAGILE THING,

AND NOW, EVEN THOUGH SHE'S PREGNANT,

IT'S LIKE SHE'S...

IT'S LIKE SHE'S UNBREAKABLE.

[SNIFFLES]

I DON'T...

[SIGHS]

IT WAS SHOCKING, I GUESS.

IT WAS SHOCKING.

IT WAS SHOCKING THAT SHE WAS SO...

SURE OF HERSELF.

BETTE...

TINA'S BEEN THROUGH SOME MAJOR ORDEALS

YOUR BREAK-UP, A NEW CAREER, HER PREGNANCY.

THESE THINGS CAN CHANGE A PERSON,

MAKE THEM STRONGER.

DON'T YOU THINK IT MIGHT BE A GOOD THING?

OF COURSE IT'S A GOOD THING.

[SIGHS]

IT JUST MEANS...

SHE DOESN'T NEED ME ANYMORE.

HEY, MARK,

I NEED THOSE BURR CONNOR DVDs BACK.

HELLO?

MARK?

[♪♪♪]

THIS IS THE PIECE CHRISTO DID

BETWEEN '80 AND '83 DOWN IN MIAMI.

WE'VE INCLUDED IMAGES FROM MICHAEL HEIZER,

ROBERT SMITHSON, WALTER DE MARIA,

DENNIS OPPENHEIM,

AND OF COURSE ANDY GOLDSWORTHY.

I'VE BEEN TALKING TO ALLYN

ABOUT COMMISSIONING A NEW PIECE.

OF COURSE WE'LL HAVE TO DO

MORE FUNDRAISING.

HOW ABOUT IF I JUST ADD IT INTO THE BUDGET?

HELENA.

WE'RE JUST IN THE MIDDLE OF A MEETING.

I'M OFFERING TO UNDERWRITE ALLYN'S ENTIRE RETROSPECTIVE.

I DON'T WANT MONEY TO BE A DECIDING FACTOR

ON ANY CREATIVE DECISION.

DO YOU HAVE A BUDGET?

I DO.

WELL, I'D LIKE TO SEE IT, IF I MAY.

WELL, I'M NOT REALLY READY

TO PRESENT IT YET,

BUT I WILL SHOW IT TO THE ENTIRE BOARD.

THAT'S NOT REALLY HOW I LIKE TO WORK.

WELL, IT'S THE ONLY WAY I CAN WORK.

I CAN DEAL WITH LEO ON THIS

IF YOU'D RATHER.

CAN WE JUST HAVE A SEPARATE MEETING?

ABSOLUTELY.

GREAT.

OH, I'M JUST GOING TO SIT HERE AND LISTEN FOR A WHILE.

OKAY.

WHY DON'T YOU SHOW HELENA YOUR PROPOSAL

FOR DEALING WITH THE PASSAGE OF TIME?

[CLEARS THROAT]

YOU DON'T THINK YOU AND JENNY ARE THE REAL DEAL?

NO.

JENNY WOULDN'T KNOW WHAT THE REAL DEAL WAS

IF IT BIT HER IN THE ASS.

SHE IS SO LOST IN HER OWN DARKNESS.

I THINK SHE LIKES IT IN THERE.

BUT YOU KNOW WHAT'S FUCKED UP?

IS THAT YOU AND I KNOW

WHAT THE REAL DEAL IS.

WE SAW IT THE FIRST TIME

WE LAID EYES ON EACH OTHER.

HELLO.

HI.

HOW ARE YOU FEELING TODAY?

SAME AS YESTERDAY.

YOU'RE COMING OVER TO MY HOUSE TONIGHT.

ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO SEE ME?

WHAT IF I HAVE

SOME SORT OF HORMONAL FIT?

I'M SORRY, THAT WAS...

THAT WAS UNCALLED FOR ON MY BEHALF.

ACCEPT MY APOLOGY?

LOOK, IF YOU WANT ME IN YOUR LIFE,

YOU JUST HAVE TO UNDERSTAND ONE THING, OKAY?

I'M NOT SOME SORT OF TOY

THAT YOU CAN TAKE DOWN OFF THE SHELF

AND PLAY WITH WHENEVER IT SUITS YOUR MOOD.

DO YOU UNDERSTAND?

YES.

YOU'RE NOT A TOY.

AND IF WE HAVE SOME SORT OF DISAGREEMENT,

THE FACT THAT I'M PREGNANT, IT'S NOT FAIR GAME.

I DON'T WANT TO BE REDUCED

TO SOME SORT OF RAGING HORMONAL LUNATIC.

IT'LL NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.

GOOD.

SO... DO I SEE YOU LATER ON?

OKAY.

GOOD.

SEE YOU LATER, DARLING.

BYE.

[GRUNTING]

YOU ALL RIGHT?

YEAH, I'M ALL RIGHT.

WHAT A HIT.

BE WITH YOU IN A SEC.

WE GOT TO STOP.

OH, THAT'S GOING TO LEAVE A MARK.

I'LL BE ALL RIGHT.

OKAY.

OKAY, THAT'S GOOD.

HEY. JENNY. HELLO.

ROY, JENNY.

NICE TO MEET YOU.

NICE TO MEET YOU, TOO.

LET ME SHAKE YOUR HAND.

YOU READY?

GREAT.

COME ON OVER.

HOW ARE YOU?

A LITTLE SORE.

YEAH? THAT'S AWESOME.

COOL.

OKAY, SO...

OKAY.

SO YOU GOT ALL YOUR STUFF?

YOU CAN USE YOUR LITTLE TAPE RECORDER TODAY.

[THUMPS]

WHAT'S THE MATTER?

NOTHING.

SOMETHING'S THE MATTER.

NOPE.

YOU SURE?

[SNIFFLES]

JENNY.

JENNY, STOP.

NO, NO, NO. COME ON.

NO, NO, NO, PLEASE.

PLEASE, LET ME DO MY JOB.

PLEASE. I'M SORRY.

JUST IGNORE ME.

I HAVE SUCH BAD HAY FEVER.

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE.

PLEASE?

[CRYING]

IT'S OKAY, ALL RIGHT?

[KIT HUMMING]

IS EVERYTHING ALL RIGHT IN THERE?

IT'S PERFECT. DON'T WORRY.

LARA IS WORKING HER MAGIC.

EXCELLENT.

[CELL PHONE RINGING]

HELLO.

HI, BABY, WHERE YOU AT?

OH, NO.

WHAT HAPPENED?

THE HOSPITAL.

OH, NO, NO, NO, I UNDERSTAND.

[SIGHS]

NO, I HOPE HER MAMA'S OKAY.

NO, UM...

OH, NO, NO, DON'T EVEN WORRY ABOUT IT, OKAY?

IT'S YOUR FAMILY,

AND YOU HAVE TO BE THERE FOR THEM.

YEAH, IT'S OKAY.

SO JUST CALL ME NEXT WEEK, OKAY?

AND I...

I HOPE EVERYTHING WORKS OUT OKAY.

ALL RIGHT.

BYE, NOW.

[♪♪♪]

[SIGHS]

WHAT?

I GUESS... I GUESS...

SO IS DINNER OFF?

JUST PUT IT ON THE MENU AND SELL IT.

[TINA]: HELLO?

IN THE KITCHEN.

HEY.

HEY.

THANK YOU.

DID YOU COOK ALL THIS?

MM-HMM.

I GAVE SANDRA THE NIGHT OFF.

YOU MEAN WE'RE COMPLETELY ALONE?

MM-HMM.

THAT LOOKS AMAZING.

I WAS ACTUALLY THINKING OF BECOMING A CHEF AT ONE POINT.

YOU'RE JUST FULL OF SURPRISES.

NOW, LOOK, I KNOW YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO,

BUT THIS IS TOO GOOD TO MISS.

JUST A SIP.

NOW,

COME WITH ME.

I'M GOING TO SIT YOU DOWN

AND WAIT ON YOU HAND AND FOOT.

[UNZIPS BOOT]

I DON'T DESERVE IT.

FORGET ABOUT DESERVE.

DESERVE SUGGESTS YOU HAVE TO WORK FOR IT.

JUST THINK, "I'M ENTITLED TO IT."

I LIKE THAT.

IT COULDN'T HAVE BEEN WORSE TIMING

FOR MY SPONSOR TO BE OUT OF TOWN.

BUT YOU FOUND YOUR STRENGTH

AND YOU HUNG ON.

GOOD FOR YOU, RYAN.

THANKS FOR SHARING TONIGHT.

HEY, PRETTY LADY.

LOOKS LIKE YOU HAVE SOMETHING YOU WANT TO SHARE TONIGHT.

HI.

I'M KIT.

HI, KIT.

HEY, KIT.

AND, UM, I GOT STOOD UP TONIGHT.

I GOT STOOD UP,

AND I...

I LOOKED OVER AT THAT BOTTLE OF WINE

SITTING ON THE TABLE THAT I SET FOR HIM,

AND I JUST SAID, "FUCK IT," YOU KNOW?

I DON'T WANT THAT BOTTLE OF WINE,

BUT I'M...

I'M JUST SO DAMN LONELY

THAT I JUST WANTED TO BE AROUND SOMEBODY

WHO WOULD LISTEN TO ME.

SO I CAME HERE.

WE'RE GLAD YOU CAME, KIT.

[GROUP APPLAUDS]

[♪♪♪]

SO THIS IS WHERE YOU SPEND YOUR TIME.

YEAH, THIS IS THE PLACE.

OH, THERE'S MY GAL.

HEY. HEY.

HOW ARE YOU, BABY?

GOD, I AM SO EXHAUSTED.

I HAD TO DANCE TWO SETS BACK TO BACK,

AND MY FEET ARE KILLING ME.

UM, IRIS,

I'D LIKE YOU TO MEET KIT.

SORRY. NICE TO MEET YOU.

SAME.

SO YOU WANT TO HANG?

I CAN GET A TABLE OVER HERE.

UM, NO, I REALLY DON'T WANT TO BE THE THIRD WHEEL.

OH, KIT, COME ON.

NO, NO.

KIT'S HAD A REALLY ROUGH NIGHT.

SHE IN THE PROGRAM?

COME ON.

SO YOU KNOW EACH OTHER FROM THE PROGRAM?

KI-KIT OWNS THE PLANET.

OH, RIGHT,

THAT LESBIAN PLACE YOU INVESTED IN.

IT'S NOT ONLY A LESBIAN PLACE, YOU KNOW?

ALTHOUGH A LOT OF MY CUSTOMERS ARE LESBIANS, BUT...

YEAH, IVAN'S TRIED

TO TAKE ME THERE A FEW TIMES.

IT'S JUST NOT MY SCENE.

WELL, MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T PASS JUDGMENT

UNTIL YOU'VE BEEN THERE.

I JUST DON'T HANG OUT WITH LESBIANS VERY MUCH.

IT'S TOO MUCH DRAMA.

I REMEMBER THIS ONE TIME

WHEN IVAN AND I FIRST STARTED SEEING EACH OTHER

ABOUT FIVE YEARS AGO,

AND THERE WAS THIS ONE TIME...

WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.

FIVE, FIVE YEARS AGO?

BABY, IT'S BEEN ABOUT THAT LONG, RIGHT?

YOU MEAN YOU... YOU'VE BEEN SEEING EACH OTHER

FOR THE LAST FIVE YEARS?

YOU KNOW WHAT? I'VE GOT TO WORK.

SEEMS LIKE YOU TWO HAVE SOME UNFINISHED BUSINESS.

YOU'VE BEEN DOING MISS THANG AND TRYING TO ROMANCE ME?

KIT, YOU'RE GOING DOWN A REAL BAD ROAD HERE.

OH, IT'S A VERY BAD ROAD, A ROAD OF LIES.

WE NEVER DISCUSSED MONOGAMY, OKAY?

WE DIDN'T GET THAT FAR,

BUT IF WE HAD, I WOULD'VE EXPLAINED TO YOU

THAT IT JUST DOESN'T WORK FOR ME.

AND I WOULD HAVE TOLD YOU TO FUCK OFF.

KIT, I'M NOT TRYING TO WIN AN ARGUMENT HERE,

BUT DIDN'T YOU JUST STAND UP IN A MEETING

AND ANNOUNCE

THAT YOU'RE SEEING A MARRIED MAN?

OH, DON'T YOU EVEN GO THERE.

YOU OF ALL PEOPLE

BETTER NOT EVEN TRY TO PASS JUDGMENT.

YOU ARE DECEIVING SOMEONE, OKAY?

YOU'RE LYING TO SOMEBODY'S WIFE.

AND THE WAY YOU LIVE YOUR LIFE?

LET ME GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE, ALL RIGHT?

EXCUSE ME.

I'M SUCH A FUCKING IDIOT.

I SHOULD'VE...

IT WAS SO OBVIOUS

THAT ALL OF THIS WAS GOING TO HAPPEN.

IT HAPPENS, JENNY.

IT DOESN'T MAKE YOU AN IDIOT.

EVERY TIME I THINK EVERYTHING'S GOING REALLY WELL,

AND EVEN IF I TRY REALLY HARD,

IT ALL FUCKS UP.

AND I THINK THAT...

MAYBE I'M JUST ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE

THAT DOESN'T DESERVE TO BE HAPPY.

BULLSHIT.

EVERYONE DESERVES TO BE HAPPY.

I DON'T KNOW.

WE ALL DO.

WE ALL DESERVE TO BE HAPPY, JENNY.

MOST OF US JUST DON'T HAVE THE BALLS

TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR IT.

YOU'RE FACING YOUR DEMONS HEAD ON,

AND THAT IS SOMETHING I'VE NEVER DONE.

YOU WANT TO LOOK AT SOMEONE WHO'S FUCKED UP THEIR LIFE?

TAKE A LOOK AT ME.

WHAT DID YOU DO?

OKAY, I'M GOING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING NOW.

[SNIFFLES]

OKAY.

MY LIFE ENDED 20 YEARS AGO,

WHEN I DESTROYED THE ONE PERSON

WHO MEANT ANYTHING TO ME IN THE WORLD

BECAUSE I WAS TOO FUCKING SCARED TO BE HAPPY.

HE HAD A GOOD CAREER, TOO.

HE DIDN'T DESERVE TO GO DOWN LIKE THAT.

ROD SEBRING, RIGHT?

LOVE OF MY LIFE.

YOU'RE A FAG.

YEP.

CARD-CARRYING MEMBER OF THE COCKSUCKERS' CLUB.

YEAH.

WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM?

I HAD MY PUBLICIST PLANT AN ITEM IN THE TABLOIDS

AFTER I CAUGHT HIM FUCKING A P.A.

CAN'T SAY I BLAME HIM FOR SCREWING THE KID.

I MEAN, I MADE HIM SO FUCKING MISERABLE.

WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT

IF YOU LOVED HIM SO MUCH?

I LOVED HIM SO MUCH.

AND NOW I'VE GOT THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE

KISSING MY ASS.

EVERYBODY LOVES ME.

I FUCK WHO I WANT TO FUCK.

IT'S SECRET.

ANONYMOUS, YOU KNOW.

I PAY THEM OR THREATEN THEM TO KEEP QUIET...

AND I'M ALONE.

YOU GOT IT RIGHT, GIRL.

BELIEVE ME.

I HONESTLY DON'T KNOW

WHAT THE FUCK I WAS SO AFRAID OF.

IT'S NOT TOO LATE.

DO YOU KNOW WHY?

YOU'RE SO LOVELY.

I'M AFRAID IT IS TOO LATE, JENNY.

IT IS, FOR ME.

I'M NOT LIKE YOU.

NOW, YOU DO REALIZE, OF COURSE, THAT YOU'RE FIRED.

PLEASE DON'T FIRE ME. NO.

I CAN'T BE FIRED FROM ANOTHER JOB.

[SNIFFLES]

YOU DON'T WANT TO WORK WITH ME.

YOU'RE TOO DAMN GOOD

TO BE CHURNING OUT SOME PRESS KIT PABLUM

FOR AN OLD CLOSET QUEEN, HMM?

YOU ARE GOING TO COME UP WITH SOMETHING.

I FEEL IT RADIATING FROM YOU,

BUT HEAR THIS...

IF YOU'RE EVER TEMPTED,

AND I READ SOMETHING ABOUT THIS ANYWHERE,

I WILL HAVE YOU KILLED.

YOU THINK I'M KIDDING?

NO.

GOOD, BECAUSE I'M NOT.

THEY JUST FINISHED IT THIS MORNING.

THIS IS WILSON'S ROOM.

JUN YING HAS ALWAYS WANTED A CANOPY.

I THINK SHE THINKS SHE'S MARIE ANTOINETTE.

OH, GOD. LET'S HOPE LADY GUINEVERE OR SOMETHING.

THEY'RE LUCKY KIDS.

MM.

THERE'S ONE MORE.

ONE MORE?

FOR YOU...

AND FOR HER.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.

IT'S... IT'S DAZZLING.

IT IS SO BEAUTIFUL.

IT IS TRULY AMAZING. I...

BUT, HELENA...

IT'S FOR WHEN YOU BOTH STAY.

I JUST...

I DID IT BECAUSE I WANTED TO.

OKAY?

I HOPE YOU LIKE IT...

BOTH OF YOU.

[♪♪♪]

WELL, WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

WHAT KIND OF FASHION SHOW?

[DANA]: JUST... JUST HANG ON.

ALL RIGHT, WELL, DO YOU NEED HELP?

NO, NO, NO, AL.

JUST... GOD, THIS THING'S SO COMPLICATED.

[THUD]

OH!

UH... YOU ALL RIGHT?

YEAH.

WHAT IS IT?

WHERE YOU DON'T KNOW WHERE THE STRAPS GO?

SORT OF.

OKAY, ARE YOU READY?

YEAH, I'M TOTALLY READY.

DON'T LAUGH, OKAY?

FUCK.

WHO'S LAUGHING?

CAPTIONING PERFORMED BY:

LINE 21 MEDIA SERVICES LTD. VANCOUVER, B.C. 2005