Original subtitles

♪ I will never let you go My pretty sweet one ♪

♪ For you're mine, love To hold, my joy and pride ♪

♪ And I hope and trust I'll never, ever meet one ♪

♪ Who will try to take you From my loving side ♪

They're coming! The boys are coming.

Yeah, and they're riding head-bent-for-leather.

Whoa.

Larry! Shemp!

Moe! Ella!

Bella! Stella!

Gosh, we sure missed you.

Yeah. So we got everything ready for the wedding.

From now on, we're gonna be at your sides forever.

That's a powerful thought...

You know, you all is just right...

♪ You're the flame Within my heart ♪

♪ That keeps a-burnin'... ♪

Hold hands, everyone.

♪ ...I'll answer to the call ♪

Now, repeat after me: "With this ring I do thee wed."

With this ring I do thee wed.

With this ring I do thee wed.

With this ring I do thee wed.

Oh, with this ring... Oh, pardon me.

I now pronounce you man and wife.

Oh!

Oh!

Mm!

Honey.

Why don't you throw that to Mandy?

I'm sorry.

Mandy, catch!

I hope you'll excuse me,

but I've gotta catch the train in half an hour.

Much luck to all of you. Sorry I've gotta leave.

Well, when you gotta leave, you gotta leave.

Gosh, with the sheriff out of town,

there's gonna be trouble. Yeah.

While you were gone, the Noonan brothers

forced their attentions on us.

They said if we married you, they'd shoot you on sight.

On sight? We'll leave town right now,

then we'll be out of sight.

So you'd turn tail and run instead of fight for us.

You cowards.

Aw, wait a minute. We can explain.

We're leaving you, chicken.

Oh!

Hm!

You heard what they said.

Sheriff will be leaving town in a half-hour,

and the Noonan boys'll be a-gunnin' for you.

Say, I'll go over and order you some coffins.

Oh, thanks.

Coffins!

How do you like that?

If we leave, we lose our wives.

If we stay, we're as good as dead in a half-hour.

Dead in a half-hour?

Say, we gotta have more time to think.

Wait, I'll fix that.

Listen, we're all nervous. Let's have a beer.

Maybe it'll relax us. All right.

That'll give us time to think.

Oh, stubborn, eh?

Here's how. I know how.

All the luck in the world...

Ooh!

Oh, oh.

I'm sorry, fellas.

Why, you... No, wait a minute, look.

We're doomed.

We're doomed, we're doomed.

I'm nervous. I gotta have a drink.

Me too. Me three.

Phew, oh, boy.

I can't drink this stuff straight.

Here, you take it.

You stoop. Oh...

Boy, that's liquid dynamite.

What is that?

Come on, fellas. Let's get out of town.

Yeah.

Hey, this town is sure deserted. I wonder why?

Because of the shooting.

Hey, look.

They're coming.

I'm going.

Don't be a coward. Oh, well, I...

Drill them on sight.

Out of my way.

I'm going in through that door.

Wait a minute. There's no door there.

Well, I'll make a door on my own.

Stoop.

Oh!

What do you think you're doing?

Taking my coat off so I can run faster.

Good idea. Ooh!

Listen, if we're gonna take our coats off,

let's do it all together. Ready? Go.

Get out of here.

Come here.

We'll sneak out to the street and watch them go by.

Then we can run for it. Right.

But be very quiet. Be very quiet.

Okay.

Hey, watch the rear...

They must be behind us. Let's go that way.

Come on.

I don't see them anyplace. Shh.

They must have got scared and run away.

If you think they're scared, tell my knees to quit shaking.

Well, if you're gonna be a coward, okay.

As for me, I'm a-stayin' and I'm a-fightin'.

Yes, sir! I'm a-fightin' to your last breath.

Right in your face. Me too.

Oh, Moe, now. Moe.

Hi, Noonan.

Over here.

Hey, Moe, look at your stone.

That's a hot one.

Larry, what's it say on yours?

Why, you varmints.

Ah!

Oh, they got me!

Oh...

Why, you...

Hey, we're out of bullets.

What are we gonna do now?

We're sunk.

If I only had a slingshot.

Hey, Larry, come here.

Get over to the general store

and see if you can find some more ammunition.

Keep me covered. Go ahead.

Ow! Ah!

Ready, kid? Right, right, right.

Range: across the street.

Elevation: 6 feet. Weight: 180 pounds

Weather clear, track fast. They're off!

Give.

Ah, good one.

I fixed you.

All right, ready, aim.

Now this time right between the eyes.

Ouch! Oh, oh, oh!

Give.

Ouch!

Oh!

Oh, oh, oh!

Oh, boy, a gun.

And shells! Am I lucky.

Oh...

Oh, gee, it's stuck.

Ah, excellent.

Let me at him. I'll blast him out of this world.

Give it to him. Now!

All right, give it to him.

They're firing back at us.

I better get him now. It's our last bullet.

All right. Blast him.

I could use it as a club.

That guy must have cat in him. He's got nine lives.

Wait a minute, Noonan. We're out of ammunition.

Come out and fight like a man with your bare fists.

Why, you...

I'll tear you limb from limb.

Wait a minute.

You take him first, killer. Why, certainly.

Why, I got you coming.

I'll chop you into little mincemeat,

that's what I'll do to you. Yes, sir.

Why, I got you prowling. I got you prowling.

Why...

Larry, ram him in the belly with your head.

Right. Come on.

- I'll get you. - No, you won't.

I'll get you. Oh, no, you won't.

Shemp, Larry! Larry, Shemp!

Hurry up!

Come on, Shemp.

Let him have it. I got him.

Okay, Shemp!

Oh, I'll get him this time.

Oh! I did it.

It's Moe. That'll fix you.

Get him up there. Come on, kid.

Where's the horse that kicked me?

Leave it alone. You're all right now.

Larry! Moe!

Shemp!

Ella! Bella!

Stella! Ah-ah!

Oh, darling, thank goodness you're not hurt.

We would never leave you.

We just didn't want you to disgrace yourselves.

♪ For you're mine, love To hold, my joy and pride ♪

♪ And I hope and trust I'll never, ever meet one ♪

Why you diddly, dag-blamed...

♪ You're the flame Within my heart ♪

♪ That keeps a-burnin' ♪

♪ But when duty-bound ♪

♪ I'll answer to the call ♪

♪ So don't stray away Because for you I'm yearnin' ♪

♪ I'm just asking you To stick around, that's all ♪

Mm!

Give me a kiss, baby.