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1
00:00:05,374 --> 00:00:07,157
What's that?
2
00:00:07,158 --> 00:00:09,072
A life needs saving?
3
00:00:09,073 --> 00:00:10,639
Well, it's a good thing
I just had
4
00:00:10,640 --> 00:00:14,077
a nap in our comfy,
cozy on-call room.
5
00:00:14,078 --> 00:00:15,078
Boom!
6
00:00:16,298 --> 00:00:18,821
Our doctors must
be well-rested.
7
00:00:18,822 --> 00:00:21,780
Working tired is the
same as working drunk.
8
00:00:21,781 --> 00:00:24,261
Although, from
a liability standpoint,
9
00:00:24,262 --> 00:00:26,089
tired is better than drunk.
10
00:00:26,090 --> 00:00:29,614
But-- oh, this room
has a humidifier.
11
00:00:29,615 --> 00:00:30,659
Oh, Jesus!
12
00:00:30,660 --> 00:00:33,096
Shut the door!
13
00:00:33,097 --> 00:00:36,491
They look well-rested.
14
00:00:36,492 --> 00:00:37,883
So...
- Oh, my God.
15
00:00:37,884 --> 00:00:39,276
- Are they out there?
- Yeah, all of them.
16
00:00:39,277 --> 00:00:40,321
The whole camera crew
is out there.
17
00:00:40,322 --> 00:00:41,365
- What?
- Even the sound guy.
18
00:00:41,366 --> 00:00:42,366
- Oh.
- What's his name?
19
00:00:42,367 --> 00:00:43,324
What is his name?
20
00:00:58,470 --> 00:01:01,385
This morning,
unfortunately, I found
21
00:01:01,386 --> 00:01:04,214
two colleagues misusing
one of on-call rooms
22
00:01:04,215 --> 00:01:06,738
in a sensual manner,
23
00:01:06,739 --> 00:01:08,305
and it doesn't matter
who it is.
24
00:01:08,306 --> 00:01:10,002
Oh, man.
Who could it have been?
25
00:01:10,003 --> 00:01:11,569
- Lacy and Paul?
- Nope, wasn't them.
26
00:01:11,570 --> 00:01:13,571
No, I think she's back
with Dr. Richards in Neuro.
27
00:01:13,572 --> 00:01:15,138
Are you serious?
They're together?
28
00:01:15,139 --> 00:01:17,097
Man, ever since that guy
got hair plugs,
29
00:01:17,098 --> 00:01:18,533
he has been unstoppable.
30
00:01:18,534 --> 00:01:20,578
Oh, that whole department's
blowing up.
31
00:01:20,579 --> 00:01:22,754
Dr. Sullivan just got veneers.
- Wait, really?
32
00:01:22,755 --> 00:01:24,843
Is there a-- is there
a text chain I'm not on?
33
00:01:24,844 --> 00:01:26,497
I heard someone saw Stephanie
sneaking out
34
00:01:26,498 --> 00:01:28,195
of the on-call room
before her shift.
35
00:01:28,196 --> 00:01:30,110
- Where did you hear that?
- Hector.
36
00:01:30,111 --> 00:01:32,329
- Oh, bro!
- I'm sorry, man.
37
00:01:32,330 --> 00:01:35,202
You said that was a secret.
I-- come on, Matt.
38
00:01:35,203 --> 00:01:37,160
Things change
when you're in charge.
39
00:01:37,161 --> 00:01:39,423
You are out of the loop.
40
00:01:39,424 --> 00:01:41,295
People don't want
to confide in you,
41
00:01:41,296 --> 00:01:42,731
even though
you're a very regular,
42
00:01:42,732 --> 00:01:44,428
very cool person.
43
00:01:44,429 --> 00:01:46,517
But, boy,
when I was just a doctor,
44
00:01:46,518 --> 00:01:49,085
I was a walking "Page Six."
45
00:01:49,086 --> 00:01:52,175
Who has a pill problem?
Oh, Mary.
46
00:01:52,176 --> 00:01:53,959
Who lost custody of her kids?
47
00:01:53,960 --> 00:01:55,484
Also Mary.
48
00:01:58,661 --> 00:02:01,184
Yeah, yeah,
Mary had a lot of problems.
49
00:02:01,185 --> 00:02:02,403
You know, all this hanky-panky,
50
00:02:02,404 --> 00:02:03,926
it might have been OK
in the past,
51
00:02:03,927 --> 00:02:08,017
but times have changed.
No more sex at work.
52
00:02:08,018 --> 00:02:10,715
Come on!
How is there a question?
53
00:02:10,716 --> 00:02:12,630
Yeah, I hate to side
with Joyce here,
54
00:02:12,631 --> 00:02:14,632
but are people really
that desperate to do it
55
00:02:14,633 --> 00:02:17,635
in the same room they go
to watch their grandpas die?
56
00:02:17,636 --> 00:02:18,723
Seriously.
57
00:02:18,724 --> 00:02:20,638
Like, even if
we weren't at work,
58
00:02:20,639 --> 00:02:22,814
who's having midday sex anyway?
59
00:02:22,815 --> 00:02:24,512
Like, that is not a thing
60
00:02:24,513 --> 00:02:26,078
when you're married
with small children.
61
00:02:26,079 --> 00:02:29,517
Trust me, you barely have time
for a nighttime sex.
62
00:02:29,518 --> 00:02:30,822
Oof.
63
00:02:30,823 --> 00:02:32,476
Can we please go
back to guessing who hooked up
64
00:02:32,477 --> 00:02:35,087
instead of doing these
sad lady stand-up bits?
65
00:02:35,088 --> 00:02:36,611
No, wait, I'm not--
I'm not--
66
00:02:36,612 --> 00:02:38,743
Alex, Alex,
you don't have to justify
67
00:02:38,744 --> 00:02:40,310
your troubled marriage
to anybody.
68
00:02:40,311 --> 00:02:41,529
I'm not saying that.
69
00:02:41,530 --> 00:02:43,313
I'm saying that
when you're married,
70
00:02:43,314 --> 00:02:45,315
sometimes it's hard
to schedule sex, and so--
71
00:02:45,316 --> 00:02:48,318
Babe, we're just gonna
leave it there, OK?
72
00:02:48,319 --> 00:02:50,146
OK, fine, the jig is up.
73
00:02:50,147 --> 00:02:55,282
It was me and Dr. Taylor
in the on-call room with the--
74
00:02:55,283 --> 00:02:56,935
well, you know what I used.
- Oh.
75
00:02:56,936 --> 00:02:58,937
Ugh.
76
00:02:58,938 --> 00:03:00,461
Oh, hey, guys.
77
00:03:00,462 --> 00:03:02,724
Um, I feel like I want to
clarify that thing from earlier
78
00:03:02,725 --> 00:03:04,029
because it felt like you guys
thought that was, like,
79
00:03:04,030 --> 00:03:05,248
sad or something.
80
00:03:05,249 --> 00:03:06,858
Do you want us to say
it wasn't sad?
81
00:03:06,859 --> 00:03:09,687
- We'll say whatever you want.
- No.
82
00:03:09,688 --> 00:03:11,689
No, I'm just saying,
you know, when I said that
83
00:03:11,690 --> 00:03:13,561
I have to schedule sex,
I didn't mean it like,
84
00:03:13,562 --> 00:03:15,345
you know, oh,
let me get my planner out,
85
00:03:15,346 --> 00:03:17,173
and I'll just pencil you in.
86
00:03:17,174 --> 00:03:19,436
You know,
I mean, sometimes I do
87
00:03:19,437 --> 00:03:21,133
have to do that, though,
because our calendar
88
00:03:21,134 --> 00:03:22,526
will fill up really quickly,
89
00:03:22,527 --> 00:03:23,788
and then months will go by.
90
00:03:23,789 --> 00:03:24,833
It's been months since
91
00:03:24,834 --> 00:03:26,008
you've done it
with your husband?
92
00:03:26,009 --> 00:03:27,792
I don't know
the exact date, Serena.
93
00:03:27,793 --> 00:03:29,403
Do you need
to check the planner?
94
00:03:29,404 --> 00:03:31,667
It's been three months, OK?
95
00:03:33,321 --> 00:03:35,713
Oh, come on.
That is not that bad.
96
00:03:35,714 --> 00:03:37,541
Three months is,
like, 100 days.
97
00:03:37,542 --> 00:03:39,239
If you haven't worked out
in 100 days,
98
00:03:39,240 --> 00:03:40,718
you wouldn't say, "I work out."
99
00:03:40,719 --> 00:03:43,199
You'd say,
"I used to work out."
100
00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:44,940
Just like
you used to have sex.
101
00:03:44,941 --> 00:03:47,334
OK, but it's not like
we don't want to.
102
00:03:47,335 --> 00:03:50,380
It's just, with kid stuff and
house stuff and my promotion,
103
00:03:50,381 --> 00:03:52,382
it's really hard.
Ron! Ron!
104
00:03:52,383 --> 00:03:54,471
OK, you were married.
105
00:03:54,472 --> 00:03:56,081
Will you please tell them
that sometimes
106
00:03:56,082 --> 00:03:58,910
intimacy takes a back seat,
and that is completely normal?
107
00:03:58,911 --> 00:04:00,347
Oh, absolutely.
108
00:04:00,348 --> 00:04:02,262
After a few years,
you have kids.
109
00:04:02,263 --> 00:04:04,351
It just ebbs and flows.
- See? Yeah.
110
00:04:04,352 --> 00:04:06,048
And that is just called
being married.
111
00:04:06,049 --> 00:04:09,094
Well, well, we technically
are no longer married.
112
00:04:09,095 --> 00:04:10,879
I guess it just kept on ebbing.
113
00:04:10,880 --> 00:04:13,185
And now she's on a ski trip
with a guy named Kent,
114
00:04:13,186 --> 00:04:15,884
so I may not be the best person
to talk to this about.
115
00:04:15,885 --> 00:04:17,799
OK, thank-- thank you.
Thank you so much.
116
00:04:17,800 --> 00:04:20,584
That's good.
You know what?
117
00:04:20,585 --> 00:04:23,631
That-- that is not
gonna happen to us, OK?
118
00:04:23,632 --> 00:04:25,894
And we are not gonna hit
100 days, all right?
119
00:04:25,895 --> 00:04:29,854
I am going to have a talk...
120
00:04:29,855 --> 00:04:33,249
With him today.
121
00:04:33,250 --> 00:04:34,730
Yeah.
122
00:04:37,515 --> 00:04:39,124
I can't imagine
going that long.
123
00:04:39,125 --> 00:04:40,691
I have sex once a week.
124
00:04:40,692 --> 00:04:42,998
I tell folks I'm going
to Wendy's for lunch,
125
00:04:42,999 --> 00:04:45,696
but I'm really meeting up with
my ex, Shelly, at her condo.
126
00:04:45,697 --> 00:04:48,525
It's the same Wendy's bag
every time,
127
00:04:48,526 --> 00:04:50,093
and no one can tell
the difference.
128
00:04:51,442 --> 00:04:53,617
Shelly is pretty toxic, though.
129
00:04:53,618 --> 00:04:55,663
Oof.
Tuesdays, huh?
130
00:04:55,664 --> 00:04:56,925
Mm-hmm.
131
00:04:56,926 --> 00:04:59,667
The old second-in-command
to Monday.
132
00:04:59,668 --> 00:05:01,669
Well, I guess
you could say that.
133
00:05:01,670 --> 00:05:04,933
Nobody else does, but sure.
134
00:05:04,934 --> 00:05:08,676
It's just been such
a wild week already.
135
00:05:08,677 --> 00:05:11,287
You know, hookups,
affairs, hair plugs.
136
00:05:11,288 --> 00:05:12,810
Ugh.
137
00:05:12,811 --> 00:05:14,986
Did you know about
all this before the meeting?
138
00:05:14,987 --> 00:05:16,248
Pretty much.
139
00:05:16,249 --> 00:05:17,815
Can hardly get any work done
without somebody
140
00:05:17,816 --> 00:05:21,384
coming over to talk about
something stupid.
141
00:05:21,385 --> 00:05:23,343
Not unlike now.
- Right.
142
00:05:23,344 --> 00:05:27,390
So people are including you
on their little group chats.
143
00:05:27,391 --> 00:05:30,219
That's nice.
That's nice for you.
144
00:05:30,220 --> 00:05:32,656
- Are you jealous?
- No.
145
00:05:32,657 --> 00:05:35,311
I'm concerned about gossip
in general.
146
00:05:35,312 --> 00:05:37,139
It's bad for morale.
- Right.
147
00:05:37,140 --> 00:05:39,663
When you gossip,
you hurt three people.
148
00:05:39,664 --> 00:05:41,491
You hurt yourself,
you hurt the person
149
00:05:41,492 --> 00:05:43,145
you're gossiping about,
150
00:05:43,146 --> 00:05:45,626
and you hurt the person who
doesn't get to hear the gossip
151
00:05:45,627 --> 00:05:47,845
by making them feel left out.
152
00:05:47,846 --> 00:05:50,674
You know, you could force
everyone to tell you
153
00:05:50,675 --> 00:05:53,198
all of their secrets.
You're the boss.
154
00:05:53,199 --> 00:05:55,723
What?
155
00:05:55,724 --> 00:05:57,594
Well, how would that even--
no, come on.
156
00:05:57,595 --> 00:06:00,249
Come on.
How?
157
00:06:00,250 --> 00:06:03,905
How would I do that?
158
00:06:03,906 --> 00:06:04,993
Hey, sweetie.
159
00:06:04,994 --> 00:06:06,647
Um, I was thinking
that maybe later,
160
00:06:06,648 --> 00:06:10,390
you and I could have some
private time, you know?
161
00:06:10,391 --> 00:06:13,480
Like, naked private time.
162
00:06:13,481 --> 00:06:16,700
Yes, Tim, like sex.
163
00:06:16,701 --> 00:06:18,354
Oh, right,
I forgot about poker night.
164
00:06:18,355 --> 00:06:21,705
Um, OK, well,
you know, tomorrow--
165
00:06:21,706 --> 00:06:23,403
tomorrow is totally booked,
too, isn't it?
166
00:06:23,404 --> 00:06:24,708
OK, you know what?
167
00:06:24,709 --> 00:06:27,756
Just meet me here at 2:00, OK?
168
00:06:29,845 --> 00:06:31,803
Yeah, still about the sex.
169
00:06:34,545 --> 00:06:36,285
Hey, team?
170
00:06:36,286 --> 00:06:38,200
Team, I just wanted to say
I'm sorry for earlier
171
00:06:38,201 --> 00:06:40,985
when I was all, "Ah, you can't
do sex stuff at work.
172
00:06:40,986 --> 00:06:42,770
I'm a mean old hag."
173
00:06:42,771 --> 00:06:44,902
Well, that is what you said
and, frankly, how you said it.
174
00:06:44,903 --> 00:06:46,687
Look, things happen,
175
00:06:46,688 --> 00:06:50,212
but I do not need to know
who's doing what with whom.
176
00:06:50,213 --> 00:06:53,476
That is not my business,
but it is very thorny legally.
177
00:06:53,477 --> 00:06:57,175
so HR insists that
all of you fill out
178
00:06:57,176 --> 00:06:59,308
one of these
mutual consent forms.
179
00:06:59,309 --> 00:07:02,224
Ah, yes, how every
passionate encounter begins,
180
00:07:02,225 --> 00:07:04,008
with a form.
181
00:07:04,009 --> 00:07:05,662
Well, that's HR for you.
182
00:07:05,663 --> 00:07:07,534
Damn you, #MeToo, huh?
183
00:07:07,535 --> 00:07:09,840
No, that was important.
It had to happen.
184
00:07:09,841 --> 00:07:11,538
It really did.
185
00:07:11,539 --> 00:07:13,844
Well, I don't know
if you realize this, Joyce,
186
00:07:13,845 --> 00:07:15,498
but this would mean
that you would end up knowing
187
00:07:15,499 --> 00:07:17,500
everyone's personal,
private details.
188
00:07:17,501 --> 00:07:20,111
No, not me.
The system.
189
00:07:20,112 --> 00:07:22,505
The system
would know the details.
190
00:07:22,506 --> 00:07:25,508
I'm just a vessel
for the system.
191
00:07:25,509 --> 00:07:27,728
So we should return these
to HR?
192
00:07:27,729 --> 00:07:29,251
Uh, no.
193
00:07:29,252 --> 00:07:32,820
You can return them to,
uh, to me.
194
00:07:32,821 --> 00:07:35,518
Yeah, me first, and then I'll--
I'll deal with them.
195
00:07:35,519 --> 00:07:38,739
Legalese and liability,
that's all these are for.
196
00:07:38,740 --> 00:07:41,263
Will I then be informed
of all the relationships
197
00:07:41,264 --> 00:07:43,613
and goings-on?
Yes.
198
00:07:43,614 --> 00:07:47,269
Is it my job to know?
Kind of, yes.
199
00:07:47,270 --> 00:07:51,100
Is it required
by HR that I do this?
200
00:08:01,327 --> 00:08:03,024
Girl, where is the fire?
201
00:08:03,025 --> 00:08:06,201
Mm, well,
I'm sneaking my lunch now,
202
00:08:06,202 --> 00:08:08,203
and then later,
Tim's gonna pick me up.
203
00:08:08,204 --> 00:08:09,465
I'll have my full hour.
204
00:08:09,466 --> 00:08:11,032
We're gonna go to
the Courtyard by Marriott
205
00:08:11,033 --> 00:08:14,949
and, you know, talk.
- Oh, look at you.
206
00:08:14,950 --> 00:08:16,690
- Yeah.
- I'm so proud.
207
00:08:16,691 --> 00:08:18,169
That's how I do it.
208
00:08:18,170 --> 00:08:20,128
Also, the hotel's only,
like, 12 minutes away.
209
00:08:20,129 --> 00:08:21,738
So 12 there, 12 back.
210
00:08:21,739 --> 00:08:25,133
That leaves 36 minutes for
the discussion and, you know,
211
00:08:25,134 --> 00:08:27,439
general cleanup.
- OK.
212
00:08:27,440 --> 00:08:29,572
First, wow.
- Mm.
213
00:08:29,573 --> 00:08:31,705
Second, maybe let me
throw some paint on that face
214
00:08:31,706 --> 00:08:33,097
and we change your scrubs.
215
00:08:33,098 --> 00:08:35,099
I don't think Tim's
gonna care, honestly.
216
00:08:35,100 --> 00:08:36,318
I mean, he sees me
in sweatpants
217
00:08:36,319 --> 00:08:38,146
most of the time, anyway.
218
00:08:38,147 --> 00:08:39,539
Oh, wow, I can tell
by your face
219
00:08:39,540 --> 00:08:41,192
that's maybe part
of the problem.
220
00:08:41,193 --> 00:08:43,847
You gotta keep it spicy.
Seduce him a little.
221
00:08:43,848 --> 00:08:47,155
You can't just be like,
"Hey, bro, wanna
222
00:08:47,156 --> 00:08:49,810
in 12 minutes?"
- What? No.
223
00:08:49,811 --> 00:08:52,247
Oh!
- See?
224
00:08:52,248 --> 00:08:54,989
Too aggro.
Not cute.
225
00:08:54,990 --> 00:08:57,774
I said no because that was
just like, obviously, a joke,
226
00:08:57,775 --> 00:08:59,950
or like a prank of sorts.
227
00:08:59,951 --> 00:09:05,216
That's not-- that's not
how people suggest sex.
228
00:09:05,217 --> 00:09:10,352
Maybe on websites.
But, you know, we are IRL, so--
229
00:09:10,353 --> 00:09:11,832
sorry, what was the question?
230
00:09:11,833 --> 00:09:15,618
Well, it kills spontaneity.
I'll tell you that much.
231
00:09:15,619 --> 00:09:17,620
Dear God, please be talking
to someone else.
232
00:09:17,621 --> 00:09:20,623
These sex clearance forms
that Herr Commandant Joyce
233
00:09:20,624 --> 00:09:22,538
wants us to fill out,
they're ridiculous.
234
00:09:22,539 --> 00:09:25,062
I mean, without random hookups,
what's the point
235
00:09:25,063 --> 00:09:27,151
of all those boozy fundraisers
we do?
236
00:09:27,152 --> 00:09:28,500
I don't know.
237
00:09:28,501 --> 00:09:30,328
Maybe raising money
for muscular dystrophy?
238
00:09:30,329 --> 00:09:32,200
Oh, come on, Ron.
Grow up.
239
00:09:32,201 --> 00:09:34,724
Look, in my many run-ins
with Eros,
240
00:09:34,725 --> 00:09:37,597
I've found that carnal love
comes on fast.
241
00:09:37,598 --> 00:09:38,685
Oh, yeah.
242
00:09:38,686 --> 00:09:40,034
And you never know
who's gonna spark
243
00:09:40,035 --> 00:09:41,688
with who and when and how.
244
00:09:41,689 --> 00:09:43,864
You know,
I just noticed that nurse,
245
00:09:43,865 --> 00:09:45,779
Callie, has a crazy lisp,
246
00:09:45,780 --> 00:09:47,868
and now I can't get her
out of my mind.
247
00:09:47,869 --> 00:09:49,478
Well, here's a thought.
248
00:09:49,479 --> 00:09:53,090
Maybe have everybody fill out
a form about everybody else.
249
00:09:53,091 --> 00:09:55,005
Then you got
all your bases covered.
250
00:09:55,006 --> 00:09:56,441
Huh.
251
00:09:56,442 --> 00:09:59,227
You're talking about
preclearing the hookups.
252
00:09:59,228 --> 00:10:02,230
Oh, Ronnie,
you crazy son of a bitch.
253
00:10:02,231 --> 00:10:04,058
You've just cracked
this thing wide open.
254
00:10:05,234 --> 00:10:07,322
People here trust me.
255
00:10:07,323 --> 00:10:10,368
They feel they can come to me
for advice, support,
256
00:10:10,369 --> 00:10:12,153
guidance, you name it.
257
00:10:12,154 --> 00:10:14,416
I just don't know
where they got that idea.
258
00:10:14,417 --> 00:10:16,331
So with my AAA discount,
on top of
259
00:10:16,332 --> 00:10:19,421
my Wells Fargo points,
the room is basically free.
260
00:10:19,422 --> 00:10:21,902
I mean, if that doesn't
get you guys in the mood.
261
00:10:21,903 --> 00:10:24,121
- Yeah.
- There.
262
00:10:24,122 --> 00:10:25,557
What do you think?
- Oh, wow.
263
00:10:25,558 --> 00:10:27,342
I really like this
lipstick color.
264
00:10:27,343 --> 00:10:28,691
Where'd you get it?
265
00:10:28,692 --> 00:10:29,866
You know that box
where we put the stuff
266
00:10:29,867 --> 00:10:31,912
we pull out of
people's anal cavities?
267
00:10:31,913 --> 00:10:33,391
What?
268
00:10:33,392 --> 00:10:35,002
I'm kidding.
269
00:10:35,003 --> 00:10:36,699
It's not from the butt box.
270
00:10:37,788 --> 00:10:40,094
Ew.
271
00:10:40,095 --> 00:10:42,662
Raj, did you get a form?
272
00:10:42,663 --> 00:10:44,402
Candace, form?
273
00:10:44,403 --> 00:10:46,100
I'll put it right here
under your keys.
274
00:10:46,101 --> 00:10:48,015
No way.
Are you serious?
275
00:10:48,016 --> 00:10:50,321
No.
Why would Claire do that?
276
00:10:50,322 --> 00:10:51,845
You know why.
277
00:10:51,846 --> 00:10:55,283
Oh, I bet you know.
I bet you know.
278
00:10:55,284 --> 00:10:57,285
Oh, sorry,
we'll get back to work.
279
00:10:57,286 --> 00:10:59,766
No, no, no.
As you were.
280
00:10:59,767 --> 00:11:02,116
So what's going on
with Claire-bear?
281
00:11:02,117 --> 00:11:03,900
Give me the scuttlebutt.
282
00:11:03,901 --> 00:11:06,207
The what?
283
00:11:06,208 --> 00:11:07,643
Just tell the story.
284
00:11:07,644 --> 00:11:09,732
Well, a few of us
went out last night.
285
00:11:09,733 --> 00:11:11,255
Of course you did.
286
00:11:11,256 --> 00:11:14,128
Fun group of ladies like you,
a bunch of troublemakers.
287
00:11:14,129 --> 00:11:15,607
Well, it did get
a little crazy.
288
00:11:15,608 --> 00:11:17,740
Ah!
Who called it?
289
00:11:17,741 --> 00:11:20,003
OK, so Claire,
she took these edibles.
290
00:11:20,004 --> 00:11:21,265
And then--
291
00:11:21,266 --> 00:11:23,137
OK, OK, um...
292
00:11:23,138 --> 00:11:28,577
I'm thinking this might not be
a great story to tell at work.
293
00:11:28,578 --> 00:11:30,274
Oh.
294
00:11:30,275 --> 00:11:31,798
But...
295
00:11:31,799 --> 00:11:33,495
Here's something.
296
00:11:33,496 --> 00:11:36,280
Did you guys ever work
with Mary Jenkins in the ICU,
297
00:11:36,281 --> 00:11:39,371
like, 22 years ago?
Because get this.
298
00:11:41,243 --> 00:11:43,375
She died.
299
00:11:46,944 --> 00:11:48,858
Now, it's very, very simple.
300
00:11:48,859 --> 00:11:51,992
Just put down anyone you could
conceivably ever hook up with,
301
00:11:51,993 --> 00:11:53,994
and then you don't have
to think about paperwork
302
00:11:53,995 --> 00:11:55,343
when arousal strikes.
303
00:11:55,344 --> 00:11:56,692
So we fill out a form
for anyone
304
00:11:56,693 --> 00:11:59,390
who we might want to be with?
- Exactly.
305
00:11:59,391 --> 00:12:01,436
It could be someone
you have a crush on.
306
00:12:01,437 --> 00:12:03,220
Could be people
you can't stand.
307
00:12:03,221 --> 00:12:04,918
You know, that kind of sex
can really
308
00:12:04,919 --> 00:12:06,310
get you out of a dark place.
309
00:12:06,311 --> 00:12:08,356
Oh, which reminds me,
what's Stella's last name?
310
00:12:08,357 --> 00:12:09,836
- Baporia.
- Baporia.
311
00:12:09,837 --> 00:12:11,794
Insane, but OK.
- I don't know.
312
00:12:11,795 --> 00:12:13,317
This kind of feels
like harassment,
313
00:12:13,318 --> 00:12:15,058
but I can't exactly
describe why.
314
00:12:15,059 --> 00:12:16,973
What?
No, it's a fail-safe.
315
00:12:16,974 --> 00:12:18,540
Everything would be consensual.
316
00:12:18,541 --> 00:12:20,716
The forms are a backup,
not a guarantee.
317
00:12:20,717 --> 00:12:22,152
Come on, how are you
not getting this?
318
00:12:22,153 --> 00:12:24,372
So what if you can't remember
the person's name?
319
00:12:24,373 --> 00:12:26,374
Is it OK to put down
their body shape
320
00:12:26,375 --> 00:12:28,245
and presumed racial background?
321
00:12:28,246 --> 00:12:30,204
That is a great idea.
322
00:12:30,205 --> 00:12:32,510
Yes, thank you for being
a problem solver,
323
00:12:32,511 --> 00:12:35,383
not a problem creator, Dakota.
324
00:12:35,384 --> 00:12:37,429
What?
325
00:12:40,215 --> 00:12:42,042
Hey, Tim.
326
00:12:42,043 --> 00:12:43,304
Whoa!
327
00:12:43,305 --> 00:12:45,393
Look at you.
- I know, right?
328
00:12:45,394 --> 00:12:47,221
Serena did my makeup
and my hair.
329
00:12:47,222 --> 00:12:48,570
But I washed
my own face, though.
330
00:12:48,571 --> 00:12:49,832
- Oh.
- Hey.
331
00:12:49,833 --> 00:12:51,268
Um, you can let go
of the door, baby.
332
00:12:51,269 --> 00:12:52,400
- Oh, yep.
- Yep.
333
00:12:52,401 --> 00:12:54,881
Uh, well,
this is kind of awesome.
334
00:12:54,882 --> 00:12:57,753
I can't believe we're
doing this in the afternoon.
335
00:12:57,754 --> 00:12:59,407
I know, right?
It's like, what are we, 15?
336
00:12:59,408 --> 00:13:01,844
Right? 15?
Wow--
337
00:13:01,845 --> 00:13:03,193
You know, we should go.
338
00:13:03,194 --> 00:13:04,238
We should get this show
on the--
339
00:13:04,239 --> 00:13:05,413
Alex, I'm so sorry.
340
00:13:05,414 --> 00:13:07,067
I know you're on your lunch.
341
00:13:07,068 --> 00:13:09,504
Really quick, do we need to
run labs on the patient in 110?
342
00:13:09,505 --> 00:13:11,549
No, I just need you
to monitor his vitals.
343
00:13:11,550 --> 00:13:13,116
- OK, gotcha.
- Yeah.
344
00:13:13,117 --> 00:13:14,596
Uh, Matt, I'm sorry.
345
00:13:14,597 --> 00:13:16,076
Did-- did you check
to make sure he's been given
346
00:13:16,077 --> 00:13:18,556
Cipro and not penicillin?
Because he's allergic, so--
347
00:13:18,557 --> 00:13:21,342
Um, not sure.
348
00:13:21,343 --> 00:13:25,259
But I assume
that I would have done that.
349
00:13:25,260 --> 00:13:26,956
OK, well, I have to go.
350
00:13:26,957 --> 00:13:29,567
So did you, or didn't you?
351
00:13:29,568 --> 00:13:32,875
I feel like I did.
352
00:13:32,876 --> 00:13:34,094
OK, you know what?
353
00:13:34,095 --> 00:13:35,095
I'm just gonna go check
real quick, OK?
354
00:13:35,096 --> 00:13:36,531
Two minutes.
- Of course.
355
00:13:36,532 --> 00:13:38,054
Do your thing.
- Mm-hmm.
356
00:13:38,055 --> 00:13:40,796
Alex is a great boss,
really patient with me.
357
00:13:40,797 --> 00:13:41,971
Well, you're probably
not a screw-up
358
00:13:41,972 --> 00:13:44,104
like that new guy
that she keeps saying
359
00:13:44,105 --> 00:13:47,063
is improving a lot.
360
00:13:47,064 --> 00:13:48,413
She really likes him.
361
00:13:50,589 --> 00:13:53,026
Hardy-har-har, real funny.
362
00:13:53,027 --> 00:13:54,897
Well, I guess
the art of romance
363
00:13:54,898 --> 00:13:57,291
is just some dumb punchline
to you people.
364
00:13:57,292 --> 00:13:58,466
What are you talking about?
365
00:13:58,467 --> 00:13:59,859
What I'm talking about,
Dakota,
366
00:13:59,860 --> 00:14:02,426
is that I've only received one
pre-consent form,
367
00:14:02,427 --> 00:14:05,647
and it's from somebody
named Fart.
368
00:14:05,648 --> 00:14:08,737
I was doubting myself
on that fart joke.
369
00:14:08,738 --> 00:14:12,828
Just overthinking it.
But hearing Bruce say it?
370
00:14:12,829 --> 00:14:14,917
It just works.
371
00:14:14,918 --> 00:14:17,615
- Here you go.
- Yes!
372
00:14:17,616 --> 00:14:20,009
All right.
My gal, Val.
373
00:14:20,010 --> 00:14:21,619
See?
374
00:14:21,620 --> 00:14:23,317
That's what I'm talking about.
375
00:14:23,318 --> 00:14:24,753
I got to admit,
I'm a little surprised.
376
00:14:24,754 --> 00:14:26,537
I wasn't sure
you'd get the vision.
377
00:14:26,538 --> 00:14:28,496
Joyce doesn't like things
to be too spicy.
378
00:14:28,497 --> 00:14:31,151
But me?
I like spice.
379
00:14:31,152 --> 00:14:32,543
Yeah, you do.
380
00:14:32,544 --> 00:14:34,850
Look at all those names.
Wow.
381
00:14:34,851 --> 00:14:37,113
Now we're talking, yeah?
382
00:14:37,114 --> 00:14:39,072
It only takes
one domino to fall.
383
00:14:39,073 --> 00:14:40,377
God bless.
384
00:14:40,378 --> 00:14:41,944
She's got just about
everybody on here.
385
00:14:41,945 --> 00:14:46,907
Men, women, lab techs.
That's a shame.
386
00:14:49,213 --> 00:14:50,344
Huh.
387
00:14:50,345 --> 00:14:52,085
Hey, guys and gals.
388
00:14:52,086 --> 00:14:56,350
Oh, you will never believe
what I just overheard.
389
00:14:56,351 --> 00:15:00,267
Apparently,
Cynthia is cheating on Brian.
390
00:15:00,268 --> 00:15:03,879
Can you believe it?
391
00:15:03,880 --> 00:15:06,186
I'm Cynthia.
392
00:15:06,187 --> 00:15:07,578
Oh.
393
00:15:07,579 --> 00:15:09,102
Well, it's a good thing
Brian's not here, huh?
394
00:15:14,282 --> 00:15:16,414
Brian, huh?
395
00:15:18,634 --> 00:15:19,808
Sorry.
396
00:15:19,809 --> 00:15:21,418
That took too long,
but we're good.
397
00:15:21,419 --> 00:15:22,985
We're--
well, we're cutting it close.
398
00:15:22,986 --> 00:15:24,726
No, hey, I can make it go
as fast as we need.
399
00:15:24,727 --> 00:15:27,033
Oh, honey, let's maybe not
sound so proud of that.
400
00:15:27,034 --> 00:15:28,730
I'm kind of excited
about this, to be honest.
401
00:15:28,731 --> 00:15:31,211
Oh, God, that looks bad.
402
00:15:31,212 --> 00:15:33,387
Yep, huge pile-up on 84.
403
00:15:33,388 --> 00:15:35,737
- 84 East or West?
- East.
404
00:15:35,738 --> 00:15:37,086
Damn it.
405
00:15:37,087 --> 00:15:38,609
We're not gonna make it
to the hotel in time.
406
00:15:38,610 --> 00:15:41,003
Also, the accident,
I'm sad about that, too.
407
00:15:41,004 --> 00:15:42,918
Well, I mean,
I got the iPad in the car.
408
00:15:42,919 --> 00:15:45,529
Why don't we just put on
"The Crown" and hang out?
409
00:15:45,530 --> 00:15:48,358
I don't want
to just hang out.
410
00:15:48,359 --> 00:15:50,274
You know what?
Here, come with me.
411
00:15:53,930 --> 00:15:55,975
You never know
who was or wasn't joking
412
00:15:55,976 --> 00:15:57,585
or not joking about what,
413
00:15:57,586 --> 00:16:00,414
so can't hurt to fill out
one of these, you know,
414
00:16:00,415 --> 00:16:01,632
just so it's on file.
415
00:16:01,633 --> 00:16:04,070
Well, Matty...
416
00:16:04,071 --> 00:16:05,462
I didn't know you were
seeing somebody at work.
417
00:16:05,463 --> 00:16:07,247
Hey, Joyce.
418
00:16:07,248 --> 00:16:08,726
Um, yeah, you know what?
I'm actually not.
419
00:16:08,727 --> 00:16:11,033
I changed my mind, so...
- Who is it. Who is it?
420
00:16:11,034 --> 00:16:12,600
- No, Joyce, Joyce--
- Just let me see.
421
00:16:12,601 --> 00:16:13,862
- Joyce--
- I'm gonna find out anyway.
422
00:16:13,863 --> 00:16:15,516
Oh, my God.
423
00:16:15,517 --> 00:16:16,908
It's in there now.
424
00:16:16,909 --> 00:16:18,432
And you're not allowed
to grab it because
425
00:16:18,433 --> 00:16:21,479
that's my private area.
426
00:16:24,482 --> 00:16:25,830
Do you have
your insurance card, sir?
427
00:16:25,831 --> 00:16:28,485
So, Val, I was looking
at your consent form,
428
00:16:28,486 --> 00:16:31,401
and I noticed the lack
of my name, Bruce Schweitz,
429
00:16:31,402 --> 00:16:33,969
and I realized, Brucie,
you didn't clarify
430
00:16:33,970 --> 00:16:35,753
if you were eligible,
you big dummy.
431
00:16:35,754 --> 00:16:38,060
People might think you aren't,
since you're the organizer.
432
00:16:38,061 --> 00:16:40,497
But just FYI, I am eligible.
433
00:16:40,498 --> 00:16:42,369
Yeah, I know.
434
00:16:42,370 --> 00:16:43,761
Hold on, bud.
435
00:16:43,762 --> 00:16:44,980
You know, putting my name down
436
00:16:44,981 --> 00:16:46,721
doesn't commit you
to hooking up with me.
437
00:16:46,722 --> 00:16:48,679
It's a "just in case" thing.
- Like a fail-safe.
438
00:16:48,680 --> 00:16:50,464
Yes!
That's what I said earlier.
439
00:16:50,465 --> 00:16:52,640
Look at that. Same wavelength.
- I get it.
440
00:16:52,641 --> 00:16:55,121
OK, it's just you've listed
half the hospital here.
441
00:16:55,122 --> 00:16:56,557
I'm into a lot of types.
442
00:16:56,558 --> 00:16:58,428
And like you said,
you never know what'll happen.
443
00:16:58,429 --> 00:17:00,430
Right.
That's why I'm confused.
444
00:17:01,998 --> 00:17:03,651
OK, are you here
for a throat thing?
445
00:17:03,652 --> 00:17:05,131
Because that's not
an emergency.
446
00:17:05,132 --> 00:17:07,307
It's just disruptive.
447
00:17:07,308 --> 00:17:09,004
Hey.
448
00:17:09,005 --> 00:17:10,353
What are you
doing back already?
449
00:17:10,354 --> 00:17:11,833
We had to pivot,
and I need a room.
450
00:17:11,834 --> 00:17:14,140
Oh, I got you.
I see you.
451
00:17:14,141 --> 00:17:15,750
Room 321.
452
00:17:15,751 --> 00:17:17,665
Oh, if it's too intense
up there--
453
00:17:17,666 --> 00:17:19,667
hey, Parker,
do people still have
454
00:17:19,668 --> 00:17:21,756
adult conversations
in that room
455
00:17:21,757 --> 00:17:22,974
with the broken Pyxis machine?
456
00:17:22,975 --> 00:17:24,324
- No, it got rats.
- How many?
457
00:17:24,325 --> 00:17:26,326
Like, a rat, or a community?
458
00:17:26,327 --> 00:17:27,501
No, that's OK.
We'll just--
459
00:17:27,502 --> 00:17:29,155
Oh, there's a guy
in a coma in 313.
460
00:17:29,156 --> 00:17:30,460
He won't know
what's happening, probably.
461
00:17:30,461 --> 00:17:31,461
No.
No, thank you.
462
00:17:31,462 --> 00:17:32,680
There's the oncology rooms,
463
00:17:32,681 --> 00:17:33,985
but some people feel weird
about that.
464
00:17:33,986 --> 00:17:35,552
Yeah, I would.
I would feel weird about that.
465
00:17:35,553 --> 00:17:36,945
- Weird about what?
- Nothing.
466
00:17:36,946 --> 00:17:38,686
- Alex wants a place to smash.
- Oh!
467
00:17:38,687 --> 00:17:40,688
Well, go in the VIP suite.
Nobody ever goes in there.
468
00:17:40,689 --> 00:17:42,646
- Ooh, and it's got a bidet.
- Thanks, team.
469
00:17:42,647 --> 00:17:44,605
It takes a village,
and I am truly horrified.
470
00:17:44,606 --> 00:17:47,956
Let's go.
Excuse me.
471
00:17:47,957 --> 00:17:50,133
- So they all know?
- Yeah.
472
00:17:52,831 --> 00:17:53,962
So I have 18 minutes
left on my break.
473
00:17:53,963 --> 00:17:55,050
So we just really need
to just get right
474
00:17:55,051 --> 00:17:56,225
to the heart of things, OK?
475
00:17:56,226 --> 00:17:57,661
Are we gonna get caught
in this room?
476
00:17:57,662 --> 00:17:59,576
No. Let's just save the
questions for after, yeah?
477
00:17:59,577 --> 00:18:00,969
Well, should I put
some music on?
478
00:18:00,970 --> 00:18:02,144
Oh, my gosh.
That would be perfect, yes.
479
00:18:02,145 --> 00:18:03,189
Oh, wow,
they have 5G in here?
480
00:18:03,190 --> 00:18:04,321
- OK.
- Oh!
481
00:18:05,627 --> 00:18:07,976
So I guess we have to
take this off-site now.
482
00:18:07,977 --> 00:18:09,151
Uh-huh.
483
00:18:09,152 --> 00:18:10,718
Hey, what's your deal
with Saturday?
484
00:18:10,719 --> 00:18:12,415
I have a girls' dinner
at 6:00, but I could be done--
485
00:18:12,416 --> 00:18:14,635
Yeah, we all have stuff.
Excuse me.
486
00:18:14,636 --> 00:18:18,856
Oh, boy, that was
a marathon of a surgery.
487
00:18:18,857 --> 00:18:21,294
Yeah, but it was all worth it
so that that
488
00:18:21,295 --> 00:18:23,383
little girl could walk again.
489
00:18:23,384 --> 00:18:26,168
What was that?
- I didn't say anything.
490
00:18:26,169 --> 00:18:28,605
Gotcha, yeah.
Yeah.
491
00:18:28,606 --> 00:18:31,260
Hey, you got a good girl here.
Yeah, one of the best.
492
00:18:31,261 --> 00:18:32,827
One of my favorites.
493
00:18:32,828 --> 00:18:34,350
I'm not putting you
on my sex list, Bruce.
494
00:18:34,351 --> 00:18:35,482
What?
495
00:18:35,483 --> 00:18:37,701
I wouldn't.
I don't even-- yeah.
496
00:18:37,702 --> 00:18:41,096
I-- I can see
what you're doing.
497
00:18:41,097 --> 00:18:43,490
And it's damn sexy.
498
00:18:44,883 --> 00:18:47,494
Honestly, if we could just--
499
00:18:47,495 --> 00:18:49,148
sorry, can we take a sec?
500
00:18:49,149 --> 00:18:51,802
Um, I kind of feel like
an on-demand sex android,
501
00:18:51,803 --> 00:18:53,195
which I always
thought would be kind of
502
00:18:53,196 --> 00:18:54,501
a cool role-play for us,
503
00:18:54,502 --> 00:18:56,372
but, you know?
- Right, oh.
504
00:18:56,373 --> 00:18:57,634
- Well, no, I mean, it's--
- Yeah, no, no, no.
505
00:18:57,635 --> 00:18:58,983
- I'm sorry.
- It's okay. No.
506
00:18:58,984 --> 00:19:01,029
Oh, my gosh, don't.
Don't-- I'm sorry.
507
00:19:01,030 --> 00:19:02,770
Listen, we haven't
had sex in a while.
508
00:19:02,771 --> 00:19:04,989
And I just-- I think I got in
my head about what that means.
509
00:19:04,990 --> 00:19:06,426
You know what I mean?
- Oh, honey.
510
00:19:06,427 --> 00:19:08,210
I think we're fine.
- Yeah.
511
00:19:08,211 --> 00:19:09,690
But, I mean, I love this.
I just think--
512
00:19:09,691 --> 00:19:11,431
No, yeah,
I just-- this is insane.
513
00:19:11,432 --> 00:19:13,215
So I probably--
I wouldn't be attracted
514
00:19:13,216 --> 00:19:14,869
to me right now, either.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
515
00:19:14,870 --> 00:19:16,218
I definitely did not say
I'm not attracted to you.
516
00:19:16,219 --> 00:19:17,524
No, sweetie, it's fine.
517
00:19:17,525 --> 00:19:18,655
Honey, no, this is
super sexy that you
518
00:19:18,656 --> 00:19:20,048
wanted to do this for us.
519
00:19:20,049 --> 00:19:22,224
And I'm never
not attracted to you.
520
00:19:22,225 --> 00:19:23,878
You're my dream girl.
521
00:19:33,236 --> 00:19:35,890
Listen, let's clear
the elephant in the room.
522
00:19:35,891 --> 00:19:37,935
This morning,
whenever I yelled "no,"
523
00:19:37,936 --> 00:19:40,199
I was just joking
because you were.
524
00:19:40,200 --> 00:19:42,505
And I really want
to make sure you know that.
525
00:19:42,506 --> 00:19:44,246
I guess I've been listening
to a lot of
526
00:19:44,247 --> 00:19:45,856
Joy Behar's podcasts recently,
527
00:19:45,857 --> 00:19:47,945
so I was just in
a silly mood, you know?
528
00:19:47,946 --> 00:19:49,947
Yeah, for sure.
529
00:19:49,948 --> 00:19:51,471
OK.
530
00:19:51,472 --> 00:19:56,998
Um, unless you weren't joking
because I actually, uh...
531
00:19:58,392 --> 00:20:02,090
uh, love for you to listen
to Joy Behar's podcast
532
00:20:02,091 --> 00:20:05,267
because it is really fun.
533
00:20:05,268 --> 00:20:06,529
All right.
534
00:20:06,530 --> 00:20:08,792
โช Weapons of war
535
00:20:08,793 --> 00:20:10,707
โช Symptoms of madness
536
00:20:10,708 --> 00:20:12,709
Yes, Sanderson,
I know I'm the boss.
537
00:20:12,710 --> 00:20:14,755
I'm just saying,
it would be nice to feel like
538
00:20:14,756 --> 00:20:17,584
I'm part of the group again.
539
00:20:17,585 --> 00:20:20,543
I don't-- I don't know
if we have Paramount+.
540
00:20:20,544 --> 00:20:23,938
Why aren't you listening to me?
541
00:20:23,939 --> 00:20:26,070
OK, well, I'm-- let me go
someplace where I can--
542
00:20:27,247 --> 00:20:28,812
Oh, good God!
- Oh!
543
00:20:28,813 --> 00:20:30,074
.- Oh, my God!
544
00:20:30,075 --> 00:20:32,686
Joyce, sorry!
I'm so sorry!
545
00:20:32,687 --> 00:20:36,777
It's OK.
Uh, I won't tell anybody.
546
00:20:36,778 --> 00:20:39,040
Your secret's safe with me.
547
00:20:39,041 --> 00:20:40,911
You know what
I realized today?
548
00:20:40,912 --> 00:20:44,045
I can be the boss, but I can
also be part of the group.
549
00:20:44,046 --> 00:20:45,264
Joyce?
550
00:20:45,265 --> 00:20:46,352
Those two things
are not exclusive.
551
00:20:46,353 --> 00:20:47,657
Joyce?
552
00:20:47,658 --> 00:20:48,919
I can wear
my fancy boss pants,
553
00:20:48,920 --> 00:20:51,618
or I can wear
my scuttlebutt slacks.
554
00:20:51,619 --> 00:20:53,228
And, look, I get it.
555
00:20:53,229 --> 00:20:55,143
We're at work more
than anyplace else,
556
00:20:55,144 --> 00:20:58,407
and the stakes are high here--
life, death, et cetera.
557
00:20:58,408 --> 00:21:01,976
So feelings are gonna develop,
and things will happen--
558
00:21:01,977 --> 00:21:05,893
crushes, romances,
flings, heartbreaks.
559
00:21:05,894 --> 00:21:07,677
I really thought
we had something.
560
00:21:07,678 --> 00:21:09,418
But was it all a lie?
561
00:21:09,419 --> 00:21:12,116
But no matter what,
we all deserve respect.
562
00:21:12,117 --> 00:21:14,075
And if you know a secret
about someone,
563
00:21:14,076 --> 00:21:16,033
keep it to yourself.
- Keep what to yourself?
564
00:21:16,034 --> 00:21:18,819
Guess who I saw
hooking up in the VIP suite.
565
00:21:18,820 --> 00:21:21,343
She told everyone,
didn't she?
41473
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