All language subtitles for New Rule Political Firestorm Real Time with Bill Maher (HBO)

And finally, New Rule.

We not-- may not be able
to do much about the weather,

but we do need a better plan
for putting out a burning city

than waiting for rain.

(AUDIENCE CHUCKLING)

America is so partisan now

that even when there's
a disaster of any kind,

so many people choose
to defend their own team,

even over death.

A lot of Democrats in this
one-party state this week

went right to,
"Don't blame politicians,

you can't do anything
about the wind,"

which is exactly half true.

-The wind part.
-(AUDIENCE CHUCKLING)

Yes, fire is
a tough fight out here.

And yes, global warming
absolutely makes it worse.

(INHALES) But that's largely
out of our control.

What are we gonna do?
Pass a ballot measure

to make sure
Chinese stop burning coal?

(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)

It's also, yes,
undeniably true

that L.A. is built

in a stupid place
to build a city.

(AUDIENCE LAUGHING, APPLAUDING)

But when it's not on fire,
it's really quite lovely.

(AUDIENCE CHUCKLING)

And it's my home.

And stupid as its origin may be,
it's not going anywhere.

Axios ran a story
on how getting the water

out of the hydrants
in Pacific Palisades

was more complicated
than it seems.

I'm sure it is.

I'm sure it's very complicated.

That's why I pay 13 percent
of my income

in this state every year

to people
who I assumed were working

on things like this.

(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING, CHEERING)

When asked why so many
of the hydrants

in the Palisades
ran out of water,

Governor Newsom said,
"The local folks are trying

to figure that out."

Yeah, you gotta do that
before the fire.

(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING, CHEERING)

At least in the Palisades,

the hydrants were still there.

Three hundred other ones
around the city

are just gone, stolen for parts.

(INHALES)
One of the three reservoirs

for the Palisades was offline

at the one time of year
when it was most needed.

(INHALES) L.A.'s mayor,
Karen Bass,

the Nero of American politics,

was fiddling in Ghana
while the city burned

and later placed the blame on,

"Eight months of negligible rain

and winds
that have not been seen in L.A.

in at least 14 years."

Yeah, that's not
that long a time.

Maybe look in the history books

to see how our ancestors
handled it back in two and 11.

(AUDIENCE LAUGHING, APPLAUDING)

The mayor said about cuts
to the fire department's budget,

"There were no reductions
that were made

that would have impacted
the situation."

The fire chief here
had a slightly different take.

She said, "We are screaming
to be properly funded."

-(AUDIENCE CHUCKLING)
-And yes, the budget was cut,

"and it did impact our ability
to provide service."

And by the looks
of all the fire engines

in the boneyard out of service

because we didn't fix them,
she's right.

-Expo-- (CHUCKLES)
-(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)

Exposed power lines
keep causing fires

and keep not getting
buried underground

because it's expensive.

I've heard people say,
"Do you wanna pay more taxes

to fund this?" No!

I want you to use
the exorbitant taxes

you already collect
to prioritize it.

(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING, CHEERING)

The power lines
that cut through Topanga

weren't upgraded
because it endangered

an herb, the milkvetch,

which sounds like something
they serve at Passover.

(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)

I mean, talk about not seeing
the forest for the trees.

You know what
the absolute worst thing

for the environment is?

Wildfires.

A '22 study found that the smoke
from just the two in 2020

wiped out 18 years

of carbon reduction
in the state,

which means we suffered
the pain of driving

those early model Priuses
for nothing.

(AUDIENCE LAUGHING, APPLAUDING)

LARRY WILMORE: Oh, man.

California is the place
that spends money

and gets nothing, which is why
you may have noticed

when the fires broke out,

no one escaped
by high-speed rail.

(AUDIENCE LAUGHING, APPLAUDING)

We have the highest
marginal tax rate in America,

higher than
almost all other states,

and soon Greenland.

(AUDIENCE LAUGHING, APPLAUDING)

Uh, what is included for that?

Breadsticks?

(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)

Because it clearly
doesn't cover fire.

That's government's job.

Protect us from crime,
violence, theft, fire.

I'm not saying Alabama
would've done better with fires

by fighting them
with prayer in school.

(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)

But look me in the eye

and tell me anyone
could have done worse.

We just got our ass kicked
by fire,

something Neanderthals
fought to a tie.

(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)

The good news is
our fire chief is a lesbian.

(AUDIENCE LAUGHING, APPLAUDING)

Am I against a lesbian
being chief?

Of course not.

Do I think a lesbian
can do the job?

Of course I do.

And maybe she's the best person
for the job.

Or maybe they really wanted
a lesbian in that job,

and she's just
the best lesbian for the job,

and with essential services,

that's not
good enough.

Crowley's official bio says,

"Chief Crowley leads
a diverse department,

creating, supporting,
and promoting a culture

that values diversity,
inclusion, and equity

while striving to meet

and exceed the expectations
of the communities."

Well, you didn't exceed
my expectations...

-(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)
-...was that the--

Which was that the whole city
wouldn't burn down.

But it's telling that diversity
is mentioned twice

before we get to "while."

"While striving
to meet expectations."

Now, can you do two things
at once?

Yes, but it matters
where your head is.

Deputy Chief Kristine Larson
said this.

Which would sound kind of racist
if a Southern sheriff said it.

-(AUDIENCE LAUGHING, APPLAUDING)
-So...

So we should be
sending White firefighters

to White houses
and Black ones to...

Who teaches people
this bullshit?

No one cares
what someone looks like

when they're pulling you
out of a burning house.

(AUDIENCE LAUGHING, APPLAUDING)

Larson also seems to believe

that if a female firefighter
can't pick up a man,

it's his fault.

She said, "He got himself
into the wrong place

if I have to carry him
out of a fire."

Well, tell that to these guys.

'Cause who pays
the highest price

when politicians
don't prioritize basic services?

The first responders are heroes

who every time
go above and beyond

because they have to,
because we leave it all to them.

Now, is wokeness
the main reason for the fires?

Of course not.

But it's also
not wrong to associate

some of the unforced errors
our government made

with the things normies
see as hallmarks

of uber-progressive politics.

Questionable budget priorities.

High taxes that get you nothing.

Making everything
about identity politics.

Virtue signaling overseas

instead of tending to the nuts
and bolts at home.

Cali has no shortage
of safety commissions

and agencies and bureaucrats
and regulators, and of course,

sign language interpreters
who communicate with their face.

-(INHALES)
-(AUDIENCE LAUGHING, APPLAUDING)

AUDIENCE MEMBER: Whoo!

But common sense?

We better get some
of that back soon,

because wildfires in California

are like boob jobs
in a strip club.

-Inevitable...
-(AUDIENCE CHUCKLING)

...and they're only going
to get bigger.

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