Original subtitles

You better take pretty good care of me if you know what's good for you.

Gary Coleman rockets into the 25th century as the president of a distant

planet trapped on a world where only Buck Rogers

can save him. I want that boy found.

Whose side are you on?

He's from old Earth, 20th century.

Your time.

I'm afraid I'm going to have to kill you, Captain.

You're gonna watch these people every minute.

The year is 1987, and NASA launches the last of America's deep space probes.

In a freak mishap, Ranger 3 and its pilot, Captain William Buck Rogers,

are blown out of their trajectory into an orbit which freezes his life

support systems and returns Buck Rogers to Earth 500 years later.

¶¶

We have an appointment with the Science Council in 20 minutes, Mr. President.

Something about redesigning the aqueducts?

Yeah, yeah, I know. If it isn't the aqueducts, it's the sewage system,

and if it isn't that, it's the transport tubes.

How did you people ever develop indoor plumbing before you thawed me out?

I wouldn't know, Mr. President. That was a little before my time.

That's another thing. I wish you wouldn't call me Mr. President.

Makes me feel like I'm 500 years old.

But you are 500 years old.

But who's counting? My mistake, Mr. President.

Sorry, Hieronymus.

That isn't much better, is it?

Go back to Mr. President.

Something wrong?

He overshot our floor.

I can't bring it to a stop. Uh-oh.

Monolithium oxide.

We'll be unconscious within minutes, but no serious after effects. I'm sorry, Ron.

It's all my fault.

Don't blame yourself. Just do me a favor. When you kill over, try not to fall on me.

This is Corrin. Operation went as planned.

The president is unharmed? Sleeping peacefully.

Excellent.

See to what he says that way.

He's too valuable to be damaged in any way.

I'll contact the Genesian government immediately and present our demands.

Zale out.

But you must help me.

The president's life depends on it.

You're the boy's bodyguard, eh?

Yes, although apparently not enough of one. Look, I

failed him once. I won't fail him again.

Lieutenant...

For years, Genesia has shunned diplomatic relations with Earth.

We have no treaty with your government.

Therefore, we cannot interfere in the affairs of a sovereign planet.

My government doesn't even know that I've come to you.

When I'd heard that you'd turned down their formal request for aid,

I thought that a personal request might be more effective.

A child's life is at stake here.

He may be a genius, but he is still a little boy.

Lieutenant, if we could help you, we would.

Our hands are tied. I see.

Well, thank you for seeing me. I'll just have to fend for myself.

Good day.

Hello, and what is your name?

Lieutenant Sertan, Dia Sertan.

Pleased to meet you. Buck Rogers is mine.

Buck Rogers?

The same Buck Rogers who broke that woman out of detention on Zeta Minor?

Well, I had a little help.

I've heard a great deal about you, Captain Rogers. It's a pleasure to meet you.

Maybe we'll... See each other again?

Maybe.

You know what? You should be concerned about it all.

Oh, I don't know about that.

I thought you'd be on your vacation by now.

Well, I was on my way, but I thought I'd drop off a gift for Dr. Hewer first.

Twiggy?

Hold your horses.

It's a tree.

Not quite, Colonel.

It's a ficus decora, commonly known as a rubber plant.

Yeah, isn't it beautiful?

I had to go to three hydroponics labs to find one.

Somebody want to take this thing?

Sorry, Twiggy.

There we are.

Well, uh...

I'm extremely touched, Buck,

but I don't think I'd know how to take proper care of such a thing.

Oh, it's a snap, Doc. You just water it twice a week

and feed it once a month. It'll grow on you.

That's just what I'm afraid of.

Well, I gotta get back to packing.

Oh, and thank you again, Buck. I was very thoughtful of you.

My pleasure, Doc.

I'll see you both in a couple of weeks.

Enjoy yourself.

Don't do anything I wouldn't do.

Uh, Colonel, I don't suppose you'd be interested

in a little added decoration in your... Not on your life.

No, no, I didn't think so.

I wish we didn't have to lie to the lieutenant.

It's obvious she cares a great deal for the boy.

I'm afraid we can't let anyone know that we're about

to become unofficially involved in this case, Colonel.

We can't refuse a call for help, but at the same time,

we cannot violate Federation law.

At least not openly.

Uh-oh.

Perfect place to hide somebody.

No law enforcement to speak of, and certainly no stellar authorities to worry about.

Exactly.

We've arranged a cover for you as a technician in the

General Service Center in the capital city of Barony.

Take this voiceprint of Zales and pinpoint his location. And remember,

you have but one week to locate Hieronymus Fox before his abductors kill him.

Piece of cake.

Piece of cake. I wish someone would tell me what that means.

Hey, easy on us, friends. Why'd they pick you up anyway? On a remainder table?

By all means, Corinne.

Treat our guest with some respect.

After all, he's about to make us all rich men.

Greetings, Mr. President.

My name is... Your name is Roderick Zell.

Your specialty is political abduction,

and your modus operandi sticks out like a sore thumb.

Half the galaxy probably knows you're the one who snatched me.

You're as perceptive as I was told.

How much are you asking for me?

A reasonable price.

6,000 kilograms of pure quadrillion.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Ain't no way the Genesians are gonna cough up that much loot, pal.

I don't even think we got that much quadrillion on the whole planet.

Then they'd better find it somewhere.

Or within a week, their technological miracle worker will die.

Oh, come on, Zell. I'm worth more to you alive than dead any day of the week.

Even if the Genesians don't pay up,

you can make a fortune selling my brains to the highest bidder.

So don't give me any of that Dr. Doom jive.

You better take pretty good care of me if you

know what's good for you, starting right now.

Now, first of all, there's food.

I have what you might call a voracious appetite.

General Service provides a complete line of food discs and soy supplements.

Food disk?

Are you kidding?

I mean real food, like french fries, milkshakes, cheeseburgers.

Cheeseburgers?

An old 20th century docusy.

Meat patties made from an extinct animal called a cow.

In a pinch, though, you can use a rejillion mountain lizard.

Mountain lizard?

Call the service center.

Get him whatever he wants.

Just don't bother me with it.

For breakfast, I usually like scrambled eggs with peppers and onions.

An onion is a bulbous plant that you grow in the dirt.

Wait till you hear what's in the milkshake.

All right, enough already. I feel like I'm in a department store.

How about giving me some of my music?

That's better.

Much better.

God bless Dr. Junius and the archives.

Come in.

Well, hi.

Lieutenant Sertan, isn't it?

That's right.

A what?

Never mind. Listen, I hope you don't think I'm being rude,

but my flight leaves in 20 minutes. I'm meeting someone on regular supply.

I really wish I had more time to talk to you.

That's all right. I don't have time for an extended conversation either.

Well, maybe we can get together when I get back.

Aw.

Why'd you do that?

Like I said, Captain, I don't have time to convince you to come with me.

Oh, that's all right. I really like it better this way.

Where are we going?

To rescue the president.

Oh, right, right. Rescue the president. What president?

Hieronymus Fox, president of Genesia.

Well, ask a silly question.

Lieutenant, this better be a joke.

And if it is a joke, it better have one great punchline.

No joke, Captain.

I'm sorry I had to do it this way.

But from all I've heard, you're the best man for the job,

and I'm gonna need the best if I'm to recover Hieronymus.

I mean, the president.

Yeah, well, look, there's something you don't understand.

I'm meeting a lady named Tangie, and if I don't show up, I'm gonna be missed.

Besides, whenever we land, wherever we land,

I'm just going to hightail it out of there no matter how many hypos you pull on me,

so why don't you just save yourself a lot of trouble, pull this ship around,

and take me back to Earth right now?

Captain, Hieronymus Fox is not a native Genesian.

He's from old Earth, 20th century.

Your time.

You're kidding.

He was a child genius.

He graduated from college at the age of nine,

got his PhD in physics at the age of 10.

When the Holocaust began, he created a device to preserve people in a cold sleep,

but it was only an experimental model.

The war escalated, and in the end, he didn't dare risk anyone's life but his own.

If all this is true, then why didn't Dr. Hewer tell me about it when I first awoke?

Dr. Hewer doesn't know.

After the Holocaust, while your civilization was still in ruins,

Earth was looted by aliens.

Hieronymus has been handed down from one generation

to another, one planet to another.

Yeah, so then the Genesians got hold of him,

decided he was worth his weight in gold, and kept him, huh?

Do you wonder why we hesitated to open up diplomatic relationships with Earth?

I mean, if you Terrans had known what we'd done...

So why should I help you recover this kid?

So you can make him a prisoner again?

Oh, Captain, he wasn't a prisoner.

Hieronymus helped us because he wanted to.

In gratitude, we made him our president.

Now he's been kidnapped. Will you help us recover him?

He is from the 20th century. You couldn't keep me away.

All right. Do you have any idea where he's being held captive?

My informants say he's being held on Aldebaran 2,

somewhere outside the capital city of Barony.

Aldebaran 2. Terrific.

Another visit to the Barbary coast of space. You know,

the last time I was there, I was almost killed.

Me too.

Great place, isn't it?

This trip is going to be a whole lot of fun.

So, here's the central core of our operation, the nerve center, you would call it.

From here, we dispatch food, supplies, fuel,

and power to all the surrounding territories. I'm not going too fast for you, am I,

Deering? I mean, I know you organic life forms

need lots of time to assimilate information.

I wouldn't want to strain your synapses.

I was just noticing your vid screens.

I take it they're monitoring all incoming requests

for supplies from private residences?

Oh, very good, dearie.

They didn't give you that degree in electronics for nothing, did they?

Now, if you're through belaboring the obvious,

I want to show you where you'll be stationed.

Please.

Nolan, Calkins, break time is over. Don't you humans ever get done eating?

Organic scum. You've got to watch them every minute.

Okay, Deering, here's your station.

We'll start you right at the top with the garbage.

You'll monitor the rate at which the sewage flows

under the city. Wonderful. I knew you'd like it.

Oh, and Deering, I like to keep an eye on my workers.

It makes me feel more secure. So if you slip up...

I'll know about it.

Excuse me, Mr. Corrin?

Yes, well, you certainly fit your description.

M.D. Tolman, I'm here to see Mr. Zale.

Oh, yes, he mentioned it.

What is it you do again, Mr... Tolman.

Well, you might say I'm in pest control.

Right this way.

Thank you.

What is that?

Transport tube. Sends out supplies from Barony.

Where do you come from, anyway? Lansing 12.

Never heard of it. Must be one of the lesser quadrants.

Not really. The entertainment dish you wanted.

Lauren, you got the manners of a sand squid.

I try. Keep an eye on him, and don't let him out of your sight.

Mr. Sayles, I want to see you. Well, of course.

You must be... M.D. Tolman.

Pleased to meet you. Well, well, well, come

in, come in. Come in, Mr. Tolman, sit down.

Well, you're just in time. I just had a call from the spaceport.

The president's bodyguard, Tia Sertong, is here on Aldebaran.

She's acquired the services of a Terran named Rogers.

Buck Rogers.

Obviously, they plan to rescue our prisoner.

Oh, I can take care of them. Don't be ridiculous, Corrin.

That's what Toman is here for.

I have the exclusive services of Mr. Toman for a week.

You mean he's going to kill them?

Mr. Towman is going to kill Dia Sertan and Buck Rogers.

All my informant knew was that Zale was within 50 kilometers of Barony.

Yeah, well, that makes sense.

None of the transport tubes extend any further out from the city than that.

Do you have any idea how we can narrow that radius down a bit?

Well, I was told there might be someone here who could help us.

He's an information broker.

He comes from Dyson 3, and his name is... Looking for me?

Over here, by the trilog paper.

I was sworn I heard that voice in my head. You did.

Over here.

Selmar?

I was given your name by... I know who gave it to you.

Yes, well, my name is... Dia Sertong, Lieutenant of the Genesian Starfleet,

and Buck Rogers, Captain, Earth Defense Directorate.

Yeah.

We're looking for Roderick Zane.

Captain, there's nothing you can tell me that I didn't

know the moment you stepped into this room.

Unfortunately, I can't help you. Not that I wouldn't like to, for the right price.

I have money, as much as you need.

Lieutenant, that isn't the point.

Unless Zale or one of his people comes into my psionic range,

we should say 50 or 60 meters. I can't tell you anything.

Even telepaths have their limitations.

Well, if you happen to hear anything, what...

You will be staying at the Hotel Verony.

I see.

Yeah, right.

Guy must be a blast at cocktail parties.

I heard that.

Well, it's about time. I've been waiting for you.

Boy, these people got a lot to learn about making cheeseburgers.

Hey, Curly Joe.

Why do you keep calling me that?

No reason.

These cruddy earphones you got me are defective.

What do you mean, defective?

Oh, see for yourself.

Pleasant dreams, Curly. The thirty-fourth of Mexico. That's definitely it.

Sertan and Rogers were seen at the casino on Darkover Street.

Toman should be arriving there shortly. And if Toman doesn't kill them? He will.

But even if they escape, they'll just be walking right into our hands.

Oh!

Sorry, fella. Excuse me. Let me give you a hand with that.

Just who do you think you are, anyhow?

Look, it was an accident. I didn't mean to spill it on you.

You're going to be an accident in a minute. You know,

it really hurts me that you won't accept my apology.

Well, if you're gonna be contrite about it, how do you accept it?

He sure puts you back in line.

Yeah, barely escaped with my life.

Look, I've been thinking.

We ought to be able to find Zales' hideout through a little aerial reconnaissance.

But how?

He told me that Zale has a squadron of starfighters at his disposal.

That must mean he has a private flight hangar as well.

We could use the heat sensors on board your ship to

detect any unusual energy sources in the area and... Yeah.

Excuse me, are you Captain Rogers? That's right.

Good.

Sorry.

Can't let you do that.

I'm terribly sorry about this, Captain,

but I'm afraid I'm going to have to kill you.

You're sorry?

He must be from Lansing 12, heavy gravity planet.

You little jerk!

Hold it!

You can stop running now. You're safe.

Where'd you come from?

I have that information you wanted concerning Roderick Zale

and President Hieronymus Fox of Genesia.

But how? Five minutes ago, you didn't know a thing.

True, but three minutes I walked into the casino, and I took a good,

long look into his mind. He works for Roderick Zale.

I can tell you your president's exact location for, say, 3,000 credits.

Here.

Now, where is he?

In a private home located 36 kilometers south-southwest of Barony. Here.

Let me implant the exact coordinates in your minds.

There.

Thanks.

What's the security like around Zell's place?

Close to impenetrable.

Terrific.

Well, at least we know where your president is.

I'd like to remind the committee that I appear

here today as a courtesy, not an obligation.

This is residence 4-3-9, sector C. This is the Dr. Hura,

I've punched in our voice print of Roderick Zayo.

The computer is comparing all voices recorded here within the last week.

Excellent.

Then your cover is still secure.

Affirmative. I'm probably taking a chance coming in here this early in the morning.

But it's the only chance I've had so far.

I'd like to remind the committee that I appear here today as a courtesy.

I shouldn't have to do this. Bingo. Bingo?

One of Buck's expressions.

It means, I think I found it.

You mean the computer has found a match for Zales' voiceprint?

There's a .007 deviation between the two prints.

I'll have to run a tracer to triple check. Deering out.

Deering? Who are you talking to?

Uh, I don't know what you're talking about.

Yes, you do, and I know exactly what you're up to.

You're using those monitors to find out when those

rich people's houses outside of town are empty,

so you and whomever you're working with can rob them, right?

Uh, uh... You humans are all alike,

always scheming to take something away from one another.

That's what I like about Aldebaran.

It's the kind of planet that destroys your faith in human nature.

Where are you going?

Oh, don't worry, Deering.

I don't care what petty thefts you're up to.

It just confirms my opinion of the lower organisms.

There must be an easier way to reach Zale.

As a matter of fact, I think there is.

What about the maintenance android?

Come on.

Halt! Transport to city property.

Okay, ma'am.

It must be that way.

He turned that bit player we gave him into some sort of sonic pacifier. Now,

how he got out of the house, I have no idea. Well, I should have known better.

But because he looked so harmless,

I underestimated the president's resourcefulness and his genius. Well,

he could have slipped through a window,

which means he's somewhere down on the grounds right now. Well, in that case,

he'll never make it past the photon shield.

But I don't want him injuring himself on our defenses, Tommen.

Go down into the woods, find Hieronymus Fox,

and this time do a more efficient job than you did with Rogers and Sertan.

Yes, Mr. Zell.

You too.

I want that boy found.

Move.

I hope Zale doesn't know we're on our way. If he does,

he'll move Hieronymus to another location.

You said it makes so much sense.

Oh, boy, what is that?

I'm sure I could deactivate the force field from the other

side if there were some way to get around the light poles.

Instead of around it, how about over it?

What? Come on. Haven't you ever heard of the flying Melendez?

No, but I think I have a pretty good idea what you're talking about.

You okay?

No problem. I always thought my elbows were my least attractive feature anyway.

Well, you were the one who said this mission was going to be exciting.

That was me, wasn't it?

There we go.

Okay.

From here on, it's all uphill.

Terrific.

Dr. Hewer, I've traced Zales' call.

He's located in a private residence 36 kilometers south-southwest of here.

Uh-oh.

The morning shift is coming back in.

I'll check back with you again on my way to Zales, during out.

Ugh.

Ugh.

Gee, did anybody get the number of that spaceship?

Uh-oh.

Uh, hi there. I bet you're wondering what I'm doing in your parcel bin.

Actually, I'm not a real person at all.

I'm a doll. That's it.

A pre-programmed cybernetic doll. My name is Ken.

Mr. President, are you all right?

Before I answer that, whose side are you on?

Yours.

Colonel Dearing from the Earth Defense Directorate.

How did you get away from Zale?

Nothing to it. I just did a quick impersonation of a sack of groceries.

Well, I guess I'm a little late. No, you're just in time.

Now, my bodyguard, Dia Certain, is here on Aldebaran.

She and somebody named Buck Rogers are on their way to Giselle's place right now.

Buck?

Yeah, and if we don't get back there and help them, they're both gonna get wasted.

You know what wasted means.

Yes, I've heard the term before.

Okay, here's what we gotta do.

Now, first, get me out of this bin, please.

What's that?

It's called a photon shield.

25th century minefield.

Yeah, except that the entire field is a mine.

One step and we'd be paralyzed instantly.

Unless I use this, that is.

Very nice.

Some sort of energy-damping device?

It's only temporary, I assure you.

Let's keep moving.

Well, what have we here? Trespassers.

Hello again, Captain Rogers.

I believe we have some unfinished business to settle. Hold it.

They may know where the kid is.

We'll take them up to Zeal. Then you can do whatever you like with them.

The Tunisian government has just received another warning from the kidnappers,

repeating their threat to kill the president at the end of this week.

They're bluffing. I just left Hieronymus 20 minutes ago.

You mean you've already freed him?

More like he freed himself.

Well, then you're on your way back to Earth.

Not exactly. Lieutenant Sertong got Buck involved in this somehow.

They're up in Zale Stronghold right now.

I can only hope and pray they're still alive. Good heavens.

What a bummer. I see. And you're going to their aid.

Where did you hide the president?

Well, I didn't exactly hide him.

Anonymous got a chance to study Zales' defenses,

and the only way to penetrate them is to deactivate them from the inside.

And the only one who could sneak in and do that is... No.

No, Colonel.

I don't want to hear this.

I don't want to have to tell the Tunisian government that their president is

walking right back into the peril that we're supposed to get him out of.

He knows what he's doing. He's sneaking in there the same way he got out,

through the transport tubes.

Besides, it's his decision. Lieutenant Sertan is his friend,

and we have to do something, or she and Buck would die.

Well, in that case, I understand, Colonel.

Just keep me apprised of your progress.

And be careful. You are out.

Deering out.

Well, what do you think? I believe Colonel Deering

and Captain Rogers have the situation well in hand.

He also believes in the Easter Bunny.

Buck, I'm sorry. If I'd known all this would happen,

I never would have gotten you involved.

It's all right. Don't worry about it. I make my

own decisions. Besides, it's not over with yet.

Yes, but... Dia, be quiet.

Inside. We're not going to tell them where the kid is, and that's that.

Yes, but Buck, they'll kill us.

The woman's right, Rogers.

If you do know where the president is hiding down there, you'd better tell us.

Otherwise, you'll both die very shortly.

And if we do tell you, we'll probably still die, won't we?

There are many ways to die.

Long and short.

Now, once again, where is the boy?

As a matter of fact, we don't know.

We were sent here to rescue him, and we can't find him.

You know something, Rogers? I think you really don't know where the president is.

You want us to think you do, to postpone the inevitable.

That's all.

Take them down to the hangar.

It's a good long walk down there.

If they know anything, they may change their minds on the word.

And if they don't?

Then activate one of my starfighters and place

them directly in front of the ion stream.

That should dispose of their bodies quickly and neatly.

Let's go.

Send out the next warning to Genesia on schedule.

We can't allow them to think anything has gone wrong.

What is it?

It's lizard meat from Rigel IV. More of the kids' weird food?

Let it rot.

This is absurd. A 10-year-old child can't elude us forever.

I'm ordering every guard we have down there.

We'll find him if we have to defoliate the entire forest.

Another few hundred meters, and we'll be on the flight hangar.

Would you mind getting that door, Captain? Do you mind if I ask you something?

Not at all.

How does one become a... Terminator?

Yeah.

What?

That's quite a long story.

You see, on my world...

People grew stronger muscles to compensate for the heavier gravity.

And to tell you the truth, on my planet, I'm considered somewhat of a weakling.

And on planets with lesser gravity?

I can do this.

You see, I realized early in life I could either stay on my world

and be a librarian or go off planet and put my talents to use.

Now, if you don't mind, the door.

¶¶

Atta boy, Hieronymus.

Going somewhere, Mr. President?

Alert! Security androids report to guard post. What is that?

You're asking us?

Listen, if you won't go check it out, we'll promise to wait.

Until I find out what's going on, we'll keep moving. Well, your shoes are untied.

Alert!

Security androids report to guard post.

Alert!

See, I told you you could knock him out.

Come on, let's go find your president.

Colonel Zell, come in, Zell.

Mr. Zell!

Mr. Zell!

Maybe it slipped back under his rock.

Shut up.

Also, help me, I'll kill you right here and now.

I think she might have something to say about that.

That one is almost as old as you are.

Old but true, Mr. Corrin.

Mighty nice shooting, Colonel.

Thank you, Mr. President.

Man, I haven't tasted food like that in 500 years.

Yes, it was quite unusual. Why do you say chili?

Mexican chili. It's a blend of herbs, spices, vegetables, meat.

Where on earth did you find the meat?

You don't want to know.

You know, Hieronymus, I'm gonna be real sorry to see you go back to Genesia.

You're the first person I met for my own time. Probably last.

He's sure the shortest.

You wanna say that again, transistor face?

What did he say?

He was apologizing, Mr. President. No, I wasn't.

Oh, yes you were. Do you want to start an interstellar incident?

Do you want the blood of thousands on your pincers?

You know, Buck, I get the feeling you're starting to like the 25th century.

Yeah, I guess I am.

People are people, no matter what century they're in.

And we got some pretty nice ones here.

Once in a while, I kind of miss the way things were, don't you?

Oh, sure. I miss cheeseburgers and comic books

and rock music and sighted morning cartoons.

Maybe things are kind of plastic here, but you can't say they're dull.

I mean, how many people do you know get to live in their future?

I guess you got a point, Hieronymus.

Looks like we're both pretty lucky.

By the way, Buck, you never did take that vacation you started off on.

Perhaps you'd consider taking it on Genesia?

That sounds like a good idea.

What do you say, Mr. President?

Could I stay at the presidential estate?

Well, I had to turn the presidential estate into a civic center last month.

But I got a little condominium across town you can stay at. Sauna, hot tub, tennis.

You play tennis?

Well, not me personally. My reach is kind of short.

But I instituted it as the new national sport a few months ago.

We play some gladiatorial games.

You're gonna watch these people every minute.

Sounds like some kind of paradise, Hieronymus.

Well, that's what they need me for, make things better.

Say, how about making some more of that chili? That last batch was good,

but it had way too many scales in it.

Scales?

¶¶