Original subtitles

Thank you.

Sorry, love.

And another thing

I want none of this 'out of sight, out of mind'.

Just because I'm not in England does not mean I cannot be reached.

I want none of this 'English Channel' mentality.

The telephone lines do not stop at Dover.

Furthermore, all executive decisions will be referred to me

and I'm relying on you, Morgan, to make sure they are.

Five minutes we're off, Mr Bishop.

Who are you?

- Your steward, sir. - Out!

I want you to phone me on the hour, every hour

just like a weather report, understand?

Yes, Mr Bishop.

What about Archimedes?

He's in the dog's home, sir.

Tragic.

Absolutely tragic, they won't allow a poor animal on a

lousy boat like this. I mean it's not, er,

not exactly the 'Queen Mary' is it?

Well, you wanted to go out this way, sir

- and the shipping line- - I know, I know.

Have you inspected it?

The ship?

You fool - the dog's home!

Of course, sir.

It's a good one.

I don't want good, I want the best!

As far as I'm concerned, the major source of

solar radiation shines out of that dog's-

The gangway's near off, sir.

Out!

The boys and I

as a token of our respect

just a little goodbye present.

What do I want with a present?

'Ere, you trying to bury me?

Now remember

tell the boys I'll always be watching them

at the first sign of disloyalty, the first hint of double crossing

they can take my

A doggie bowl!

We had it made up at Aspreys.

Look.

It's got his name on the side, 'Archimedes'.

Yeah

tell the boys if any of them step out of line,

they'll be sent to my punishment people.

That's a very kind thought, Morgan.

Sir, unless you're coming with us.

Goodbye, Mr Bishop.

Au revoir. Remember, this is only a tactical withdraw.

'He who hits and runs away, lives to fight another day'.

Yes, sir.

Archimedes, I take this as a tribute to the both of us.

Holts!

Holts shipping.

This is Detective Inspector Regan here - Scotland Yard.

I'm making enquiries about a man named Bishop

no, not all the phones at Scotland Yard are coin operated.

The Commissioner shares a party line with the Queen.

No, I'm afraid I cannot tell you the serial number of my warrant card.

Look, Bishop may be travelling on the 'Subad'.

She sailed already?

Yeah.

Yeah, well, thanks for your kind co-operation.

She sailed.

Hello, guv. They're in there.

Oh, come on, Moose.

Don't waste my time.

I know you know.

You know I know you know so tell us where he's gone.

I'm asking you once again, where is Mr Bishop?

He's gone, boss.

I know he's gone. But where has he gone?

He just left, boss.

Ah, he didn't just leave, did he'?

He paid off the servants, he put covers on the furniture. He sold his Rolls Royce.

He's even put the dog into a home. Now all that takes time.

One minute he was here, the next minute he was gone.

But where, man, where?

He left no forwarding address.

Alright, take him in.

I'll sort out the charges later.

- Charges, boss? - Yes, Moose. Charges.

- Hello, Mr Regan. - Hello, Moose.

Pringle'll get nothing out of him.

Mr Pringle.

- What about Bishop? - Clean away.

Find out where the dog's been parked. Keep and eye on it.

The dog?

Superintendent!

Thank you and goodnight.

I found this in the milk bottle.

Written in his own hand.

No more milk.

Yeah, well he's right isn't he?

Where he's going, it will be all champers and chips

- birds with no bras and all that. - Find where Pringle's taken the Moose.

Use your charm. Go down to the cells and find out what he knows.

Okay, guv.

Play Pringle up as a heavy.

Now promise him anything you like but try and get some kind of information.

Right.

- Don't you ever knock? - Captain's compliments, sir.

I always make a point, steward, of never letting alcohol touch my lips

- until we're out of territorial waters. - We are, sir

or we couldn't have open the Bond, could we?

Oh well, in that case er, why don't you join me?

The nice thing about a cruise ship is the cheapness of the booze.

The nice thing about this ship is that it's not British.

I want to talk to you about Bishop, guv.

It would appear that he's clean away.

Mr Pringle's worry now.

Mr Pringle is Fraud Squad.

He's been given carte blanche.

He's not a copper, he's an accountant.

Aren't we all?

He didn't join the force, he fell through the hole in the Inland Revenue.

Well that's the future, Jack.

It will be if we don't pull our fingers out, guv.

You're supposed to keep academics like Pringle off my back.

Why aren't you in the canteen sticking knives between his shoulder blades?

Y'know somewhere out there beyond the Post Office Tower

there is a vast committee called Pringle

constantly regenerating itself.

Yeah, well let's be practical.

Alright.

I'll arrange a meeting between you, Pringle and Maynon, The Commander's away sick.

It won't do you any good.

You'll be eaten alive.

Alright Jack, what's the grievance?

For the last two years, members of my squad have been investigating Bishop

with a view to finding something big enough to bury him.

We conducted the enquiries in the usual painstaking manner

that is from the ground downwards.

At the same time, we had over one hundred other cases on our books

so our resources were limited.

Nevertheless, we were just about to put something together

when I get the news that Bishop has fled the country

and I am informed that the Superintendent is about to take over the enquiry

and the Squad is being told to back off.

As I understand it, over the past

five years neither your squad, nor any other element in the Job

has been able to obtain anything that looked

remotely like a conviction against Bishop.

I was brought in because of his activities in the City.

He was buying into companies where his presence represented a threat.

He has recently obtained interests in the Bantram Group.

This group has interests in small arms manufacture

security companies and, Poperjays, their printers are actually under contract

to the Bank of England.

This isn't the Open University, sir. We don't need a lecture.

My brief came from the Assistant Commissioner of Crime.

- In plain and simple language, it was to- - To warn Bishop off.

That was not the brief.

That was the result.

Bishop has done a bunk. And two years of

painstaking enquiries have gone down the drain

because someone in the City over-reacted when he started making waves.

Oh, I don't know.

The only other conclusion is that you blew it.

It is a fact that now he has left the country

he's no longer a threat to Bantram.

It is also a fact that now he has left the

country we have the problem of getting him back.

I don't think we really want him back, do we?

You may not want him back, sir. But I do.

That man has personally sliced people into

pieces and canned them at his plant at Croydon.

You think I'm joking?

That's wild talk, Jack.

I want him back.

And how are you going to do that?

Any way I can.

You're on thin ice, Regan.

The Norfolk Police have got a lead on the Greenberg killing.

They've arrested Charlie Norton.

Forget Bishop.

Hand your files and information to the Superintendent.

I want you to go up there and interrogate Charlie Norton.

Yes, sir.

Squad office, please love.

How d'you get on?

They destroyed me.

- Well, I did warn you - They've picked up Charlie Norton.

I get stuck right into one case and another comes up, right out of the past.

It's just my luck. Regan.

You're not going to give up as easily, are you?

Hello George.

Hello, guv. I've got the Moose.

- What happened? - Pringle let him go, didn't he?

Great.

Yeah, so I nicked him again.

Where are you?

- Downstairs. - What do you mean downstairs?

In the car park.

You're breaking all the rules today aren't you?

Yeah.

Well what d'you want me to do with him? We're a bit exposed down here.

Keep him out of sight till six, then bring him up.

We've got to hang on a bit, Moose.

Do you mind me asking where we are?

Scotland Yard.

Out of the frying pan into the fire, so to speak.

Oh, I wouldn't say that.

You're in Mr Regan's hands now.

Getting popular aren't I?

Well, 'popular' isn't the word I'd use.

You see we live in a world of supply and demand

and you are in demand.

Like a toilet roll.

If you say so, Moose.

You were right, guv.

Bishop's on the 'Subad' heading for the Med.

- There's been two more calls. - Yeah?

The Norfolk Constabulary called

they're awaiting your confirmation of when you're going up there.

Tomorrow night. And you and Carter will also be coming along.

- Me, guv? - Yeah, that's right.

- But it's my night off tomorrow. - Was. I'm shorthanded. Anything else?

Mr Pringle's office.

They called to say that Sergeant Carter has

re-arrested Moose and they're not well pleased.

Well, I didn't expect they would be.

What is this, may I ask?

It's an electronic surveillance device.

It has been used by Mr Haskins to chart the

approach of the tea trolley for the last week.

Which is why we've been getting our tea hot for a change.

- Oh I see. Well what you doing with it? - Look, I know it's irregular

but I'm going to see the Moose in the office. When he leaves, I want him tailed.

So get out there quick.

Hello, Mr Mathews.

Hello, Moose.

- Nice offices you got here. - Come on.

First time I've ever seen them.

Come in, Moose.

Sit down.

Mr Pringle's going to put you away for a long time.

He's got nothing on me.

- He practically told me as much. - He'll find something.

Yeah, he's a very persistent man, the Superintendent.

Sergeant, canteen's open. You must be hungry.

Er, you want anything, guv?

Moose?

Bring him up a bacon roll. You like two?

Two bacon rolls.

Carter's a good fella.

Yes, we had a nice chat coming up in the car.

Loyal, but thick.

- Thick? - Thick!

However, loyalty's a rare thing these days innit?

That's why I appreciate your loyalty to Mr Bishop.

- You do? - I understand it.

- You understand what? - Your loyalty.

After all, you've been with him seven years, isn't it?

He told me so himself.

- Mr Bishop? - Yeah.

Y'know how much he trusted you.

'Jack', he said to me

'apart from you, there's only one other person I really trust'.

- You? - Me.

Me and you?

Oh, of course that was some time ago.

Before all this blew up.

He's had some bad words to say about you, Mr Regan. Of late.

Of course.

'Cos I'm in the invidious situation, aren't I?

I'm conducting the flaming investigation against him, aren't I?

So all I could do was warn him about Pringle

and tell him when it was essential that he get out.

Course, where you were concerned he didn't think Pringle would arrest you

let alone put up these conspiracy charges.

What charges? He let me go.

Mr Bishop gave me orders that if Pringle was to take any liberties

I was to get you out of his clutches.

And I have.

You shouldn't have done that, Mr Regan.

- You'll get into trouble. - Don't you worry Moose.

But listen, Sergeant Carter will be back in a minute with the bacon rolls.

So er, if we're going to work out how we can help Mr Bishop.

We haven't much time.

Now what about his dog? ls there anything we can do there?

It stands to reason, doesn't it.

It was Charlie Norton.

The deceased was doing Charlie's wife.

The gun was stiff with Charlie's prints

and the suspect drives off in Charlie's car.

Well it stands to reason doesn't it.

It was Charlie who robbed him.

I'd have thought the case was proved, me.

You're a genius, Matt.

These reports, these reports, these reports.

These reports connect Bishop with the filling stations.

It seems that he was trying to move in on the independents.

Yes I know that, Inspector.

This one in particular, Shepherd's Bush.

One of his companies bought into the service station through a dummy partner.

A certain amount of violence was used.

Hm, but no court proceedings.

The owners didn't have a leg to stand on. Literally speaking.

Next.

This is our personal file on Bishop.

Backgrounds, habits and associates.

He's very fond of Gilbert and Sullivan.

Gilbert and Sullivan?

And, of course, dogs.

Dogs are his -

Next.

This is the stolen car file.

He was involved in exporting stolen cars to Cyprus.

Well we're not going to get him on anything like that.

I mean the Director of Public Prosecutions isn't.

There's enough here to go to the DPP. with.

What for?

Extradition.

Next?

Roberts and Leicester, theatrical agents.

A funny thing happened to Roberts on his way to the theatre one night

he fell down a hole.

What would Bishop want with a theatrical agency?

Cash flow.

Next?

Next - next - next

Course, I can't believe that Charlie did this all on his own.

Why not?

He's got pride like the rest of us.

Look, if someone was having it away with your wife and stealing your life savings

well you wouldn't write to the papers about it, would you?

No.

No. Neither did Charlie.

So he got out his Holland and Holland and blew the geezer's head off.

It's a classic case of 'Crime Passionel'.

Did anyone re-call Thorpe?

From the dog's home you mean?

Yeah, you did put Thorpe onto the kennels, didn't you?

Well yeah, but you haven't told me to take him off.

I know I didn't tell you to - but I can't think of everything can I?

Well, I'm sorry guv. I just got so carried away with this caper.

Well what were your last instructions to him?

Well, wait there till he was relieved.

How long ago was that?

Three days.

There are some times, George

when I believe you are incapable of looking after a potted plant.

Let alone personnel!

Sorry, guv.

Oscar two three.

No, Inspector Regan's in Norfolk.

Oh, it's you Thorpe, why didn't you say so?

Er, hang on, there's a message for you.

Yes, it says don't worry - help is on the way.

I've been here for three days.

I'm starving.

I need a fresh change of clothes.

I'm dying of exposure, sir.

Yes well it says if you need any help, try and

contact a D.S. Gallagher at the local division.

He says he is the only human being around there.

Thank you, sir.

Yes?

I'm looking for D.S. Gallagher.

Detective Sergeant Gallagher's on sick leave.

Are there any other human beings in the building?

No.

Hello, Mr Carter.

- Charlie. - Where's Mr Regan?

Having dinner. Take a seat.

Am I on the front page?

You're on page 3 and there's not even a picture.

I got my hair cut specially - they came along and took hundreds.

Well, maybe they're saving you for the Sundays.

You tell me the secret, Charlie.

Did you shoot him?

If you don't mind, sir.

I'll save my breath until Mr Regan arrives.

- You're late. - Has the copper gone?

- Yes, he's gone. - I thought he'd never go.

Yeah well, he's bound to be back, so we'll have to work fast.

Hey, how will I know which is Archimedes?

By the spikes on his collar.

And how will I calm him down? Stop him from barking?

Give him this sweater.

It's one of his master's. He loves it.

- That'll do the trick? - Should do.

Take these.

'Ere, what are they?

Tranquillisers.

- For me? - No! For the dog.

These are for you.

What are they?

Reds.

You've got a long drive ahead of you.

It was the night I got out. I came home -

Is this your opening 'Parl'? 'It was the night I got out'.

Was that what I said?

Yeah, come on, Charlie, you can do better than that.

Where were you the night you came out?

I was on the town, wasn't I - celebrating.

And I came home and there she was in bed.

Lying there with nothing on but a mink coat.

God, I said. Where did you get that?

Alright, Charlie skip that bit.

Tell us what happened on the night of the killing.

I'm leading up to it.

Yeah, like a Nineteenth Century novelist - 300 boring pages.

When did you shoot him?

On the thirteenth. But this was only the tenth.

Well skip the next two days.

I have no intention of skipping the next two days.

I heard he was living up here in Norfolk and without thinking about it

I was driving up here with a shooter in the boot.

How it got there, I'll never know.

You put it there, Charlie.

I suppose I must have done.

Regan.

It just came to me that I had to kill him.

It was 'Crime Passionel', you might say.

I was calm but there was this horrible force squirming up inside me.

There was a four letter word frothing from my lips.

What do you mean the dog is gone?

- 'Kill' - that was the word. - Who?

'Kill! Kill!'

Oh turn it off, Charles. Just for one moment.

I'm giving it to you straight- I had to kill him. 'Kill!'

Are you telling me it clipped its way through a barbed wire fence.

It's a bleeding dog, Thorpe.

Next you'll be saying it was all blacked up with a beret on its head.

'Kill!'

Yeah, I want you to find it at once!

Oh, where was I?

You said, 'Kill, Kill, Kill, Kill!'

Now listen, pull in the owner of that home.

He's what?

A major in the what?

Well, you outrank him, son.

Don't take any lip from the army.

I'll be down there tomorrow.

Yeah, now listen get onto Superintendent Pringle this is his pigeon.

No, don't wait till the morning. Wake him up.

I can't hear myself think.

- This is an important moment. - Sorry Charles.

The dog's got out.

- Well, what do you know? - But the best bit's have yet to come.

Yes, well I'm sorry Charlie.

I'll read it in the Sundays. I'm afraid I've got to go back to London.

But I'm doing a favour, Mr Regan.

I'm saving you thousands of pounds of tax payer's money.

Yeah, well you'd have made it a lot easier

Charlie, if you'd surrendered to the first priest

fireman, or police constable you came across

or better still

you could have got a train down to London.

We'd have reimbursed the fare and er

you could have worked out a whole story, between you, your brief

and the papers right there in my office.

Take over, will you George?

And keep the paragraphs short.

It was the night I got out - it was lashing down with rain.

It's been made to look like an accident.

A dozen escaped. But it was an outside job.

The lock to the compounds been forced.

Hm. Where's the owner?

Rounding the rest of them up.

Evidently they went for some sheep.

Oh, well erm, Eddie

erm would you go back to the transport cafe and get us some

I don't know, egg sandwiches and fill the thermos. You take sugar?

- Yes, guv. - And sugar - if there's any.

This is the local law.

Not very co-operative.

Good morning, sir. Are you the owner of this establishment?

No. I'm Detective Superintendent Pringle. Scotland Yard.

Yes, I'm the Sergeant from Hunstanton.

Oh good, well look, I want you to get on to your headquarters

and ask them to send a photographer up here as soon as possible.

Oh, and I want whatever strength you've got on your C.l.D.

There hasn't been a murder, has there?

There will be if you don't get a move on.

Hello George.

- Check out these contacts. - Righto, guv.

How's it going?

He hasn't said a word, guv.

Er he keeps going over the same old story, but then

when he gets to the important bit just he blanks up.

I feel like giving him a kicking.

Be patient he needs to be loved.

Regan?

- Good morning Superintendent. - The dog's gone.

Yes, so my D.C. told me.

So what was the idea of staking the place out?

I wanted an eye kept on it.

For what purpose? You failed to prevent the dog from going.

If we ever get Bishop before a jury a little

lark like this could jeopardise the whole case.

My intention was simple - to follow the dog.

Because it's destination is where Bishop's going to be.

Oh...that's why you had Moose re-arrested.

Yes.

Did you put a tail on him?

- Yes. - and?

We lost him.

For the last time back off will you, Regan. This is my case, remember.

You were saying, George?

Cheers

The owner's back, sir.

Did my driver say anything about the tracks?

144's. High speed and for a heavy car.

God

they could be 200 miles away by now.

We could put out an all ports call, sir?

For a dog?

They'd never wear it. Everything costs money these days -

- Get 'em to go over this area again, eh. - Yes, guv.

Good.

I had an Electronic Surveillance Device on test.

it's disappeared. Mathews said you took it.

Yeah, that's right guv. I locked it on the bottom of Moose's Range Rover.

Huh. Alright. Where's the Range Rover now?

Well that's the point. It's disappeared

right here.

- With my E.S.D. - That's right, guv.

You've lost my E.S.D. Have you any idea how much those things cost?

Wait a minute I haven't lost it, guv'nor. It lost itself.

After all, it's supposed to be unloseable.

That's the whole point of the machine, innit?

Gives off these little bleeps so that you can tell where it's going.

They cost a fortune.

Look, we were asked to evaluate it.

Well, I have just evaluated it.

In fact, I can give you my considered verdict:

it's useless.

We've lost Moose and the dog, and the machine.

It was working perfectly well on the tea trolley.

Well, that's life.

Back to the drawing board, innit?

See, the thing is Stanley.

What you've got to realise is this is temporary

see. I'm here only for a short time.

Oh but Jerry, I've told you - it's already too long.

The bank are getting nervous.

They see this... holiday... as a sign of weakness.

An admission of guilt, you might say.

Stanley I just got here.

Look Jerry, you are about to go public.

The shares in your company are ready for issue.

Now merchant banks and

brokers of repute are ready to launch you into a new future

and you need it.

Agreed Stanley.

But the moment I decide to go straight, I am persecuted.

By malicious elements who see me as as some threat to their own futures.

Exactly.

So you must come back and fight.

If I come back certian irresponsible men will want to put me in jail.

Such as who?

Inspector Regan for one.

- Oh there's nothing he can hit you with. - Don't underestimate Regan.

He can manufacture a case. He's done it before.

Oh no - Regan's not in the running.

No it's Pringle from now on and he's a nobody.

Now that too is a mistake.

Now Regan is so bent he cannot be straightened, but Pringle -

Pringle's a nobody who wants to be a somebody.

Now he's a head hunter. And I don't want my bonce in his trophy room.

What you've got to realise Stan is that these

guys are paid to destroy people like you

and me!

They're in the demolition business. Don't underestimate them.

"What comes up, must go down."

That's their motto.

But Jerry, I beg you

you're fighting shadows!

I'll stay here till everybody's been sweetened.

I have my girl, my flowers and soon, I hope

my dog.

What more can a man need this side of a million dollars?

Cables for you Jerry.

Hello.

You fly home, Stanley - take care of things.

Alright, Jerry. But don't say I haven't warned you.

"Bye bye. -Bye.

Paragraph.

Furthermore, I know nothing about the escape

of Bishop's dog from the Salthouse Dog Home

other than what I've read in Detective Constable Thorpe's report.

Paragraph.

It was unfortunate that D.C. Thorpe was not relieved for three days.

This was due to an oversight.

Paragraph.

On the other hand

Superintendent Pringle had at no time indicated

any intention of placing the dog's home under observation

so I do not understand his complaint.

Under his charge the dog would have escaped more easily

and probably sooner, in fact

just like his master did.

Mark one copy for the Commander and one for Mr Pringle.

- Is that all? - Yeah.

Tell me

I don't suppose you go out with married men?

Only for money. How many copies for the files?

Two thousand seven hundred and fifty.

That's him!

on

Wait for me!

Archi - come here!

Are you sure Jerry?

I know him. It's him.

Where's the tin opener?

You're not going to give him tinned meat?

I don't trust the steak out here.

Well we eat it!

And only Evian for the first week. You can't trust the water either.

He he he. Come on boy. He he he he.

Woah. Come on boy, Steady!

Can you hear him?

Listen to him.

Come here.

Hello, Miss.

A toast.

Hello, boss.

A toast - to weary travellers -

Welcome to France

here have a champers and

That's not my dog!

Porter! It's alright. I'll take him.

Cheers.

Hello, Moose.

Been to a football match?

What's going on?

Have a nice flight?

Terrible.

Are you nicking me again?

Dunno.

Where've you been?

France.

Delivering a dog?

- The wrong bloody one, wasn't it? - Oh dear.

There you go.

What about my luggage?

You haven't got any.

Hello, Moose.

Hello, Mr Regan.

I gave him my trust.

Treated him like a brother.

It was not a mistake.

How could it be a mistake?

He arrived here with that dog wearing HIS collar.

I'm not upset, Henry.

I merely strangled the hound with my bare hands.

Eh, no it's not a felony here no.

No. They eat them here Henry,

Yeah, they eat them here. Yes.

Now look, I want you to find out what happened to Achimedes.

No - I do not recall what happened to Moose.

Yeah, yeah - he got away. Yes, yes - he caught the plane.

Now look, this is very important Henry.

What - He- Henry? Hello?

Henry? Hello He- Henry? Hello?

I would have thought someone with your expertise -

They're all teeth to me.

Well how'd you recognise him in the first place?

By the spikes on his collar.

- You mean someone changed the collar? - Not someone

you did.

Not me.

It was Mr Pringle.

I told you not to trust him.

I wouldn't pull a stunt like that.

Whoever did, it was evil,

Mr Bishop nearly killed me.

Not to worry. He had you insured.

Who did?

Mr Pringle.

You're putting me on.

Don't be daft. How'd Bishop take it?

Bad. He attacked me.

Then the dog went for him

and he went berserk.

He got hold of the dog in some sort of Judo hold

and the two went rolling around the floor, biting each other. 'Grr! Grr!'

It were terrible.

Hello, hello, operator? I want London.

Quatre heures?

Allo pronto. This is very very urgent.

Come here. Sit down.

Sit down. Sit down!

Hold on to this phone.

The minute you get a reply get hold of Sir Basil, right?

Call him at the Golf club if necessary. Ask him to right me back here at

6 O'clock. I'm going to the town to send some cables.

Hello? Hello?

Alright. Where is he?

- Who, sir? - Mr Regan.

Oh, Special enquiries, sir.

And the Moose?

Well I don't know, sir.

Inspector Regan picked him up at the airport

didn't he - at 10:00 a.m this morning.

Did he sir? Excuse me.

And where's the dog?

What dog?

Bishop's dog.

- I thought he was in France. - Bishop's in France but his dog isn't.

- Well what do you mean sir? - I mean that somebody switched the dogs.

Now listen, I want the Moose, Inspector Regan

and the right dog. In that order, understand?

Well, I'll leave a message that you called, sir.

It's about the best I can do.

Archimedes!

Oi!

Here boy - Come on!

Archimedes!

Basil - Basil I have a problem.

My d09 '

Has Stanley been?

Yes - well look, the situation is like this.

Yeah, look. Never mind the switch for the moment, that can wait till later on.

Look Basil, what I want from -

What I want from you, Basil, is a complete rundown on

the law concerning the Metropolitan Police and my dog.

How can the police hold my dog?

What are their powers of arrest concerning animals?

What has my dog done to de --

Course they've got him! Who else has?

Of course they'll deny it.

They always deny it, don't they?

Come on, Moose.

Just for me?

I tried so hard.

I know Moose.

It would have been worse but for that dog.

He really loved you, that dog. Didn't he?

Yes

he saved my life.

And Mr Bishop strangled him with his bare hands, eh?

Here.

'There but for the grace of God', I thought 'went the Moose'.

It's all Mr Pringle's fault, isn't it?

That's right, Moose. Mr Pringle put you in it and Mr Bishop has now gone mad.

You're likely to end up in the waste disposal

like his girlfriend Cathy, if you're not careful.

So what can you do?

Mr Pringle wants you to turn Queen's evidence, but that's dangerous isn't it?

You'll have an armed escort each time you go to the Old Bailey

but a good chance of being shot every time the guard bends down to tie his shoelace.

Whereas, all I want from you is everything you know about Bishop on the tape recorder.

No trials, no porridge, no statements. Nothing.

Of course they've got the dog.

I don't care if there's no evidence - You're

in public relations, that's what I pay you for

get out a story.

Let the Press build it up.

Get on to the R.S.P.C.A, tell them that the police are making war on animals.

That's right, they're turning on dogs. I'll have the whole nation behind me.

I'll take it to the Hague. There must be something in the UN Charter about it?

Well, look it up!

It crumbles.

The whole structure just - just crumbles.

The whole rotten structure just crumbles that's all.

Sorry I'm late, sir.

Last time it was your turn, Inspector. This time it's the Superintendent's.

Bishop has briefed Sir Basil Davidge

to take action in the High Court for the recovery of his dog.

Where is it?

- Jack? - Well obviously the dog was lost

on the night that the others got away.

Are you saying you haven't got it?

Of course I haven't!

As a matter of fact, Superintendent, if we are being honest - I thought you had it.

Yeah, in fact I thought what a devastating detective

the Superintendent is becoming in his old age.

He's obtained possession of the dog

and is holding on to it as an inducement for Bishop to return to this country.

Even presuming I had gained possession of the dog

what legal right would I have for withholding him from Bishop?

There is no law which prevents a dog from leaving this country.

But there is a law which says that no dogs can be imported into this country

without first undergoing the usual period of quarantine.

Archimedes is such a dog.

Bishop illegally imported him two years ago.

So what you're suggesting is that his illegal

entry is sufficient to have him held

at the Metropolitan Dog Compound?

- Until his owner claims him. - But Davidge can apply for possession.

We can oppose it.

You're on thin ice again.

How long do you think we would have to argue the

case before Bishop gets on a plane and comes home?

This is the one thing he can't handle from France.

All this, of course, supposes that the dog can be found.

I think we can safely leave that to Inspector Regan

after all, he seems to have worked out everything else.

How's the Moose, by the way?

I released him after he gave me a statement.

It's one of the great historic documents of our time.

Yes, okay. I'll accept that. I'll go along with that. You just

find the dog, Inspector, and we'll proceed from there.

Hmm. That's nice. How many men will you need, Regan?

To find the dog? Oh, er, Sergeant Carter and me should suffice.

Over fifty square miles of forest?

We were both in the Boy Scouts at one time.

So they've picked it up.

It's in the police pound -

Well it's only a rumour, Jerry, we've had no official confirmation

there's no possible identification unless somebody comes forward with the proof

well the proof that it's an American pedigree

Jerry - that's what they're looking for.

Well they say that it's an American dog and they want to see the Import Licence

and the date of entry, etc.

Well okay. - it's not called an import license.

Well I - I - I I'm not your lawyer, Jerry.

I'm your accountant. To me a dog is a dog.

Yes, well. I am on the line, Jerry

to tell you the script issue is not going forward.

Well Hanleys don't think that this is a propitious moment.

Come on.

Aww

- Morning, Doris. Morning, guv. - Morning Sergeant Carter.

Your E.S.D turned up, all by itself.

- Oh really? - Cor.

Yes, I think you're right.

Guv.

That's saved you �500 off your wages.

I didn't lose it. You did!

All electronic surveillance equipment in the

department is your responsibility, Sergeant.

- Well there it is, good as new - Hello, Bee

get me Irene. I don't know her second name.

Where did you find it?

Under the Range Rover. At the house of one Stanley Hedge, chartered accountant.

Check it with records?

- Did better than that, I got a wire tap. - Cheeky.

The dog has not got an Import Licence. First of

all there is no such thing as an Import Licence.

Second, I brought the dog in on a fishing boat.

Okay Jerry, it's not called an Import Licence.

I'm not your lawyer Jerry - I am your accountant

Tomeadogisa-

Hello, look tell Irene

the one with the big chest and the ringlets.

Yeah tell her that Jack Regan can't take her to the pictures tonight.

But he'll send a car round with the tickets so she can take a friend.

How much more of that?

About an hour before I was warned off.

Irene eh?

What state is Bishop in?

He's going potty.

Yes so will the Commander if I don't make that wire tap official.

You'd better come with me.

Er what shall I do about that? Give it back to Haskins?

No, put it back under the tea trolley

there it was performing a really useful function.

Get dressed - we're going to the airport.

- The plane doesn't leave till five. - We're going now.

You don't think they've got that dog in that pound for nothing? Do you?

He'll get rabies - fleas

there are diseases dogs get just by smelling each other

they'll be waiting for you. You know that?

He'll be lonely

confused.

It's been six weeks now.

He'll be out of his mind.

You're out of yours.

What did you say?

Oh, I'm sorry Jerry. I didn't mean to argue with you

Get your bags packed!

Don't worry old boy, we'll get you out of this.

I'm not without influence, y'know.

Guv'nor!

Lindair flight 105 Toulouse to Heathrow. Passenger list includes Gerald Bishop.

Alert Scotland Yard. Detective Superintendent Pringle.

Detective Inspector Regan. Please confirm. Heathrow.

He's coming back.

Thanks.

Game, set and match, don't you think?

Yes, sir?

Will you have my car sent round to the side door please?

I don't know Inspector. I'm more cautious than you - I'd call it fifteen - love.