Original subtitles

Downloaded from YTS.MX

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Well intentioned. He spoke.

We are laughting too much!

We don't need dress on black tie.

What is this? Why this is a problem?

The weeding is here, here. Weeding is here.

You are lovely as a bride, honey.

And you look lovely as a waiter...

Look, as soon as I get to Italy,

I'm going to the church of Saint Anthony

to fulfill my promise!

I finally met the man of my life!

Saint Anthony, just to let you know,

hat guy there is me, okay?

Look at the size of this line!

Don't you think we're marrying too fast, do you?

Fast? Look at the size of this line!

We've been here for six months.

Did you bring everything?

Let's see, ID, birth certificate.

Oh, my God, this is you?

Your name is Fabio Clovis?

Your name is Mia then, so don't push it, okay?

Man, you're thirty-two?

Hey, you told me thirty. That's so cute, you lied about your age.

Stop, focus, Fabio. Focus.

Next...

And 120 reais in cash. Youbrought it?

I did. And another 200 dollars to spend on the ship

because I'm going to splurge

I'm daring, I'm going to get the money,

throw it all out and then get it back,

because I'm not crazy.

Wait, wait! Did you bring a witness?

I'll give this guy behind us thirty bucks

and he'll swear he knows us since childhood.

Fifty!

Huh?

Next.

We got married, happiness, rise. Hi, Judge, how are you?

The thing is, you have to marry us quick,

our honeymoon will be in Europe...

First time you're going to Europe, right?

Yeah, how do you know?

Because people who've never been to Europe

love telling to any stranger that they're going go Europe.

Let's roll, guys... I, Mia, accept you, Fabio,

in sickness and in health, in poverty... it's important

for you to understand the poverty part...

There's twenty bucks missing.

Hey, but wasn't it 120,00 reais!?

Mia, you told me that it was o...

You've paid me, I'm not giving it back!

Next!

Take it easy, Mr. Justice, you're of the peace,

aren't you?

The name says everything.

Isn't there a discount for cash payment?

Next!

I promised Saint Anthony that I would personally,

thank him for the day that I met a handsome

intelligent, kind, successful man...

Forgive me, miss, but where is this man?

Oh, you're so funny, you're a real riot.

We married! Come on, husband!

Quickly!

Calm down beloved wife!

I'm practically carrying all the bags!

All of your bags, right?

Man, what is all this for?

Look at me, I'm the bride... one bag!

When it starts getting cold and you ask to borrow a coat,

I'm not giving you one!

You know that we are going to go through all these.

Different temperatures during the crossing

of that endless ocean, you know?

Why do people throw rice, huh?

What a stupid tradition.

Not to mention that rice is fattening.

You wanted them to throw brown rice, Mia?

Shouldn't we catch a cab, Fabio?

Look at him there.

Hi, Mr. Péricles! You took your time!

Thank God you got here!

Everything will be fine. Trust me!

Go!

- Come on baby! - Whait, Mia.

- Whait, hold on the ship. - Lets go, get out here.

- Stop! - To Italy!

Italy. Speed up!

Oh, that's lovely! Look at the size!

Why doesn't it sink?

Put aside the passport and the ticket.

We're going to Europe!

On a plane at least I can at least take a pill

and induce a semi-vegetative state and just wake up

at the destination.

My mother warned me that I would get dizzy and feel sick on the ship.

But we haven't even gone aboard yet!

I didn't know you were so afraid of ships!

I'm not a man to be afraid.

It's dread!

Relax, it'll go away soon, it's too much emotion

for one day, right?

I'm impressed!

Have you ever felt this sometime in your life?

There was this time that I helped my father

to carry a sack of cement for construction at the house.

It was very similar.

Take a deep breath, feel the salty sea smell,

let's embrace this ocean.

I can't take a deep breath now, because there is something

crushing my lungs.

Things are kind of heavy for me.

And to embrace he sea, I have to drop you to the floor,

so you choose.

Let's turn around, love!

What?

Wheel around, like in those romantic movies you know?

The couple kisses and twirls around and around.

Loved the idea. But how about this that

romantic movies have too; Let's go to our room,

get naked and have sex?

I love that about romantic movies.

Okay, let's go to the room then.

Hey, hey, hey!

In your arms.

Or it'll be bad luck.

Oh, so this that I'm trying to do is luck for you?

Good of you to tell me.

My love I want to enjoy every second with you!

I can't wait to get to Our master suite plus.

Our room, pleased to meet you, Mia, room? The best cost benefit.

Cost benefit in this case is like

"you pay cheaper and gets a real bargain staying

in a room that looks really cheap!”

Mia, many things in the room cause anguish,

you want to do a lot of things and stuff

when actually the point is to what?

To have sex and spoon

I doubt that a balcony with a view

to the ocean can make you anguished.

I'm going to tell you that this view is making me feel

very anguished... come here, because you can fall out.

Be very still...

Hey, Mia, what can I do?

It's the room.

Look, the room is simple, but our trip

will be incredible.

Just let me make a call...

Yeah, me too.

Hey, Mommy, how's everything?

Hi, Pri, how are things At the newsroom?

You're going to love Mia! Italy, yeah!

In installments!

Okay. But what about the story On renegade Brazilian

exports in Asia?

Say it again, boldus tea

and lemon balm tea.

But if I can mix Paracetamol with

acetylsalicylic acid and clonazepam,

do you think there'll be some bad side effects?

Okay, when I get back from the honeymoon,

we can have a meeting with the team.

No, Grandma, I haven't had a fever yet.

Let's hope.

Hi, Aunt Santinha!

If you need anything, try my personal email, okay?

I ate it, yes, I did I made it,

I made that yogurt loosens everything,

Mom, I have to hang up because something is going on.

I'll call you back, Mom. If I survive.

Okay, big kiss. What is happening?

Attention, attention all passengers

are called to perform the emergency drill.

Dress your jacket life preserver and go to metting place.

It hasn't even left and it's already sinking?

- What is going on? - Calm down, calm down.

It's a routine procedure, love.

Is it routine to sink?

What is this?

Come to the middle of the bed,

we have to keep to the middle.

What is going on, for the love of God?

I don't understand why we're wearing a life vest!

When I travel by plane I don't have to wear a parachute.

Fabio, can you stay close to me, please.

If I hold you, both will be falling. I'm sic.

Lady and gentleman, welcome on board.

In case you listen the emergency alarm,

Is ♪ short beeps after one long beep.

You have to dress the savety jackets.

And go to metting point.

- Can I ask you a question? - Sure! Why not?

Is there a boat for everyone or

just for the rich, like on the Titanic?

Fabio...

Hey, guys, it wasn't a joke, it was a sincere question.

Hmm, this food is wonderful.

Excellent whistle.

Love, are you afraid of sinking from your chair?

Take that off, please.

Just let me keep it on today until I get used to

this idea of being on the high seas.

It makes me feel so safe.

Look around you, everyone is happy,

excited, taking pictures.

Hmm, look.

Could there someone famous out there?

Oh, I think this is so chic.

Every chic place has a tragic event happen there.

And if there is someone famous here

then it's even worse.

Because the newspapers are only going to

talk about the celebrity and I'll be buried as an indigent!

Hi, how are you?

Thank you very much.

You can leave the bottle on the table, please.

Wait. It's all included in the package?

Oh, then you can take it away! Thank you.

Come back only with water.

Be back only with wather. Please, drink only a little.

Stop!

You gave me something to me, right.

Stop!

Stop! Look at! What?

We get food at this time.

You are so lovely, you know?

Let's take off this life vest?

No!

Haven't you heard about safe sex?

What is it? Are you crazy?

Cruise minibars are even even more expensive

than hotel minibars, Mia.

You're an economist and should know that.

Okay, so I die of thirst, is that it?

What do you want? Water?

I brought water, so we wouldn't have to spend money.

Hey, the room is occupied.

Who are you?

Good morning, darlings.

I am Suzana, cabin chief and I.

Oh, and also to warn you to hurry up because your

time is almost over.

What is it?

The boat is sinking and there aren't enough boats.

What boat, kid, you're going to miss breakfast!

It's only served until 10 o'clock!

Man, we slept really well, right?

We've already missed a lot of things, Mia.

Have a look, we lost a lecture on the importance

of arnica, a relaxing walk with Uncle Ruy,

a Jacuzzi for pregnant women

Mia, we're paying we have to enjoy everything!

He's just kidding.

Well, if you want it, I can bring your breakfast

to your bed, no problems.

That way you can relax, wake up on your own time,

acuddle a bit.

That's great!

God, what a mess!

Let me take care of that.

I'll put everything in the closet for you.

The service here is super VIP, huh?

Honey, for just 40 extra dollars, I wash, iron, sex...

Look, that's one of their tactics, I know!

We don't want it.

What's included in the package.

Do you want me to warn reception that they mixed up

his bags with those of a teenager?

Mia, this tobogan is a monster.

Man, this tobogan is awesome!

Fabio, don't you think that now that you're

a married man you should try to speak

less slang, read some adult books

Mia, seriously, now that you're a married woman,

couldn't you relax and let your man be happy

with the entire range of his tastes and hobbies?

You're right, I'm sorry, I love you!

Wonderful little fuck we had earlier today.

WONDERFUL.

The five minute one because you wanted to come quickly

to enjoy the day?

My love, here the days are wasted in dollars!

We have to enjoy them!

And all that phobia, all that fear?

It was terror, we know that, and it was replaced

by the fear of being here on the ship, spending

a fortune and not enjoying and not making the most of everything!

Excuse me, lovely couple!

My name is Wilson and came to tell you that in a

few minutes we'll have the forro class with me

and the lambaerética class with Guilherme Malhagao.

It's not right that they're both at the same time.

Because if those two Classes are in the package,

the right thing would be for me to be able to do both...

But you have that right!

You're the one who chooses!

Then I'll do the forré class and you the lambaerébica!

That way we enjoy to the max the advantages of the ship.

He's joking...

Come on, forward and backwards.

To one side, go...

You're great.

Now make your bodies sexy, everyone.

Very sexy.

That's great, now each of you choose a partner!

Oh, lovely creature, what's your name?

Fabio.

Fabio, I'm going to take you out of solitude you'll

be my assistant!

Mia, don't drink that, drinks are included

in the package, right?

Not at all, you have to pay for everything.

I get it, your wife likes to spend a lot?

Actually, I don't know, we've only known each other a month.

It was a love at first site thing.

I'm finding out here.

Really?

Then enjoy this moment all you can.

After that it's all down hill.

First there's the "you're the love of my life" phase,

then it's "come on, man, don't talk like that to me"

and at the end the "you fucking bastard,

"I should have never met you" phase.

Just to remind you that I'm on my honeymoon and

you're an employee paid to entertain, give hope.

That's right, but you can't have joy and hope

in the life I lead, kid, especially with a bitch

for an ex-wife over there.

This woman invaded my room today without even asking

for permission.

She did the same with my life.

Which is much worse.

Hey, Wilson, you could really have a good thing here, you know?

All these hot chicks...

And you think the chicks are the ones who hit

on the entertainers?

My turn to dance with the big boy!

Of course! It's an honor!

What is your name, ma'am?

Ma'am is in heaven just like the three

husbands I buried.

My name is Mirtes.

You are very elegant, Mirtes.

I imagine these husbands left behind much more

than just good memories for you.

Let's dance.

Let's dance... Come your face close, please!

That scented that you are today!

Let's start?

What's the name of her best friend?

Correct. And couple 3?

Who is Lu?

What is his favorite movie?

Dead Poets Society.

My God, they're Jamaicans, they're cold, what more

do you want from a movie?

Purple.

That's a color?

He said color.

Clarice Lispector.

The blogger?

Crotch.

Fabio...

Oh, unfortunately couple number 3 is disqualified.

I can't qualify you, you haven't made any points.

It's much better!

Because it means that we'll get to know each other

much better during our life.

It's much better to be surprised ten years from now,

like: Carolzinha, who is she?

Oh, your best friend...

Couple 1 has won. Congratulations!

They won a super fanny pack.

Congratulations, a fanny pack!

And inside the fanny pack, there is a stay at a five

star hotel in Italy!

Couldn't you even remember that my favorite director is Truffaut?

Truffaut? Isn't that a kind of chocolate?

Fabio, I showed you one of his movies, remember?

All I remember is that when I woke up some documentary was on TV.

I'm tired, Fabio.

You won't stop for a second.

You won't even stop talking! Do me a solid.

You know all the old ladies fall for me,

you have access to the ballroom key

I take the old ladies there and in half an hour of dancing,

I get some money from them.

You keep an eye out to make sure no one comes.

Forget it, Wilson, I'm not going to be a pimp

for my bankrupt ex-husband who takes advantage

of dancing grannies.

We have to find another way to make some extra money

and get out of here.

I can't stand looking at your face every day!

And you think I can stand it?

Second day and they're already at it.

You know what that's called?

Marriage.

Poor guy, he got married too fast.

I think this marriage isn't going to last,

it won't last even until Europe.

I want 50%.

You want? What?

Give me 50% of what you make with the old ladies

that I'll help you with the illegal ball.

I hate doing business with you.

If on the second day of marriage you're already tired,

I don't know how it's going to be when we get to Italy.

Let's choose together, love.

Gym opening. The most modern in America.

Bridge ten.

You don't even like exercising.

But it could be fun, they'll have some hotties.

Fabio!

I mean, some hot activities some nice bikes...

Let's go? I need to work on my glutes!

I've surfed, did rock climbing, and participated in marathons!

But I had never seen sport as an extension of my work.

Today I know that the courage necessary to jump

from a mountain at a height

of 300 meters is the same for new investments!

Without will and passion, we wouldn't have become the

largest fitness enterprise in Latin America!

Wonderfull! He? He get atletic power.

Let's go further up ahead.

No, I'm fine here.

Don't you want to go back to our room, love?

I need to take one of your anxiety meds.

Suddenly I feel so afraid of ships...

It's written there that the guy's biography is for free.

Why not get a copy?

We already missed out on the quiz prize.

Sailing is necessary.

And so is working out! We wish you all a good trip!

Hello, fine? My name is Fabio, can I have another one?

I'm here with my wife over there, Mia!

It's our honeymoon!

Oh, that's your wife?

She is shy?

Not at all, she's jealous of me, poor thing.

Lots of hot chicks here, right? It's just a passing thing!

Can you autograph it for me, please.

Write "For Fabio and Mia, with love"...

Man, what a chic guy.

He completed a master's degree In Massachussets.

He completed a master's degree in sports marketing

management in llli-fucking-nois!

I'm not feeling very well!

Hi, how are the lovebirds?

Everything is fine.

Actually I already cleaned up the room, you can give me

tip next time, okay?

But you just got married and you're already so pale,

not knowing how to tell your husband that it was a mistake?

That love doesn't exist and that living with any other human

being is unbearable?

It's not because Wilson kicked you to the curb that we are going

to be unhappy, right?

Honey, I don't know what that lowly employee told you,

but I was the one who let him go.

Take it, I just came to give you this VIP invitation

for dinner tonight.

VIP invitation?

Enjoy! Considering how cheap you are,

it's not always that you have this chance, right?

Is it an actual invitation in the sense that it's free

or one of those trap invitations and you have to pay at the end?

Looks like it's an actual invitation,

but we can forget about this.

Let's just stay in our room tonight, just you and me?

"Fabio and Mia, who are already on a honeymoon, I will have great

pleasure to receive you for a special dinner at the

ship's best restaurant.

I'll expect you at nine.

"A big hug, Beto Assunc¢ao!"

Ah, it's from him, is it?

That's nice.

Rich people love making friends with ordinary people.

It brings credibility.

And I have charisma right, so I bring people together.

But we didn't bring clothes for this VIP restaurant.

You didn't even bring a basic blazer.

Basic or not basic blazer my ass!

You know what, love? I would rather we have

dinner just the two of us something more simple.

Honey, you're going to have dinner just with me for

the rest of your life.

And it's always going to be beans rice potatoes.

But tonight I want to enjoy with the love of my life a little

free glamour.

Can you do that for me?

Great!

Is that one?

Great!

Is good!

- And now? - Is Ok!

-For what? Good, you nor looked at!

Oh, Sir!

And now did you like this one?

That's great.

By the way, you cancelled the dinner.

Now we're going to the Oscars!

You're not going dresses like that, are you, Fabio?

You can't go to dinner with that shirt!

Why not? I've had dinner with it since I was 15

and I've never had any problems!

Let's focus here, Fabio: This one or this one?

They're just the same so it doesn't matter.

Of course not this one is white and this one is eggshell.

Oh, I get it. Give me the eggshell one then.

Oh, my God, have you seen the price of this white shirt

trying to be eggshell?

Forget it, put it back.

Eh! Is very chic! What is this?

Honey, I have to tell you something.

I didn't want to come to this dinner because Beto, he...

Look him there, can you talk later.

How are you? This is Mia, my wife.

Who would have imagined!

This is Fabio, my husband.

I know, very nice we spoke at the opening!

But let's sit down.

My wife should be coming soon.

You know how it is they take ages to get ready.

I do.

I got ready really fast.

I took two seconds.

Per favore puo portare che il vino italiano rosato?

You still like rosé wine, right?

Yes, a lot, my favorite.

Fabio?

- Could be. - We studied together...

How are Dona Ruth, Mr. Luiz Carlos!?

Great. My parents...

And your uncles, they still have that house in Ibiuna?

You still like French movies?

Truffaut, right?

Wow, some good times at that house!

Taking a bath in the river and then a movie.

I used to invite my class from college...

Look, make yourselves at home.

But I warn your chef, Nicola, is offering a tasting menu...

Wow, awesome, congratulations to Nicola!

Listen, don't these chic dinners always have those bullshit shrimp dishes?

Where's the shrimp?

Fancy restaurants always have them.

He's joking.

This is my wife, Laura. Mia and Flavio.

Fabio.

Hi honey.

Hello, good night. Good night.

Wow, you...

L... Laura?

Ih, it's Titty! Titty! Titty!

Come, Laura, this kid is strange!

you seem familiar to me, you know?

I have an ordinary face, that's all.

I'm sorry I'm late.

I was on the phone with an old patient.

Laura, and it's not just because she's my wife,

but I'd say she's one of the best doctors

in the country.

Don't exaggerate...

That's great. What's your specialty?

She's a pediatrician, but she is really in love

with alternative treatments.

Chinese, Indian medicine! A great woman!

Stop, Beto. I really love children and...

She loves studying! Helping people!

Wow, pediatrician is really cool. I love kids.

You really wore me down tonight!

Stud! Sexy! I want more!

Later, Dona Mirtes. Later. You have to take a medicine.

Dona Mirtes wipe out she dance very well.

So? How much did we make?

They came with this talk that seniors pay half price, Wilson.

I got 100 dollars.

Fifty for me and fifty for you.

Old crows! And I'm sweaty all over,

giving my all in the electronic meringue!

For nothing!

I make more money cleaning toilets.

Since we split up, you've been going down hill, honey.

Fuck!

And now in Salvador we're going to open the first

six units in Bahia.

So you see, the company is really growing.

Wow...

And, Mia, what do you do?

I'm a economics journalist...

Save a little is good, but you don't!

And how did you meet?

Yeah, how?

Let go of me so we can sing Happy Birthday.

Are you nuts? Look at what you did.

You got my hair all wet, my new dress.

In Paris, right, love?

Hi, would you have something that's less "sea"?

A cheeseburger, an omelet?

He's joking!

And Fabio? What does we work with?

And speaking of work!

Sorry, it must be one of my companies!

- Hello, mr. Rubens. - Binho, how is everything on the ship?

Yes, Mr. Rubens, everything is as expected.

I'm sorry to bother you, son, but what is the costume

we have to send to fix?

Batman or Spiderman?

The orphan man's, who lost his parent's too early.

What, son?

The one who lost his parents in a robbery, so sad.

He finally get revenge and turn out a milionnare!

We are almost close the deal.

We have to grow up!

Hello, Fabio?

I didn't understand anything.

Police captain? Judge? Criminal lawyer?

I work with big events.

Imagine that, another business man at the table!

Large parties, very sought after, thematic, with great impact, crazy...

What kind of audience?

Child audience.

Education?

Yeah, you could say that.

His family has a child's buffet.

Oh, that's so cute.

Gee, I've always people who manage to stay forever

in their childhood.

Actually, how many memories today.

Laura, I forgot to tell you, but Mia and I used to be sweethearts!

Really?

What a coincidence.

I am very happy to have met you at this,

very important for me.

And for you, of course!

A toast to your honeymoon!

Dessert?

Look, I can't stay any longer.

Remember, love, that we were going to see

the rerun of that Sunday show?

It's almost time. So I have to go!

Success!, pediatrician, very happy.

I'm taking the rose because she loves it... You see?

I didn't even want to come to this dinner!

But you couldn't give lose a free meal

for anything in the world.

If you weren't so cheap, we would have had

a romantic dinner just the two of us.

Lying is ten times worse than enjoying

toasts and VIP invitations, Mia!

I didn't lie. I tried to tell you.

Why are you so irritated?

Because I'm a childish, fearful man who never

left my childhood, isn't that right?

Enough, this argument makes no sense!

Forget it, Beto!

You called me Beto?

No, I said Fabio, Fabio.

I said Fabio.

Don't be silly, honey.

Beto is part of another part of my life.

A time when everything was fun, partying, adventure.

Really?

Of course! Now I want to have kids, stay at home

and watch TV by your side!

Oh, with him its fun and with me its washing the dishes!

Fabio, there is no reason for you to idealize my relationship with Beto.

We had many problems.

Tell me one them.

And it better be good.

"Oh, he didn't cut his toe nails".

I want something serious!

Okay... Well we had a serious sexual problem.

Ah-ha! I knew it!

These guys can't get it up, they have their blood

stuck in their heads.

It was just like that... but it was the opposite.

This hyperactivity thing was the worse.

Beto wanted to have sex all the time, morning, noon and night.

It was a terrible problem!

I'm going to take a walk and figure out what is

the best way to kill myself and we'll see each other later, okay?

Meanwhile, you can have your favorite rosé, okay?

I'm very tired!

What a surprise finding your ex-girlfriend here...

So much time lost with intense, crazy, jealous, scandalous, aggressive women.

Where were you that you didn't show up sooner?

Are you sure that my meeting my ex didn't bother you?

Of course not! You had a love life before you met me!

And since I enjoyed it, it was great, I really had fun.

But you're not bothered, are you?

No, love. It's all fine.

Give me a whiskey, please.

Did someone die or your problem is just marriage?

I've just found out that the super millionaire on the ship

is my wife's ex-boyfriend.

And the worse thing is that she never told me about him.

She thought you would be bothered because you're poor or she never

forgot this guy and thought you would be bothered

because you're poor.

Hum?

It's that the poor guy complex is the right answer.

And the guy is married with the most beautiful from my school.

I was crazy about her during all my teenage years.

Wait a minute!

Your wife is much more hot because I'm a red blooded man and

I saw her in a bikini today and she's here with you on a honeymoon.

She's not with him.

You're really going to waste a night of make up sex because

of some shitty millionaire with whom she did not marry?

Why are we here?

- On the ship? - Yeah.

Because we got married and...

And we love each other...

Okay, it's getting good...

We love each other and I'm crazy about you...

It's getting better, I like it...

And I'm crazy for you and I'm really getting horny

I love you very much!

I love you too!

Let's go, baby.

Fabio?

That tasting menu didn't agree with me!

What didn't agree with you was stuffing yourself like a refugee.

Go on, get dressed already, we're already in Salvador.

Does the HMO helicopter come out here?

Come on! My godmother is dying to meet you, get rid of that sick face!

Honey, look at me, I'm in no shape to go.

But she said she would make a vatapa, acarajé, that

shrimp with garlic and olive oil that you love.

Honey? You're not okay, are you?

You go, honey. I'll be fine.

Are you sure?

Of course, this here is nothing! I'll be fine.

Hi, Beto.

Where are you going? I can give you a lift.

Forget it, Beto, there's no need. I'll wait for the next one.

Don't be silly, Mia.

I'm in a car, I'm heading downtown, come on.

Yeah... ok.

Just drop me off anywhere and I'll catch a cab.

Calm down, we're getting to the infirmary!

You had to have taken some medicine against seasickness,

this happens very frequently.

I not only took twenty of those pills as I took all the other medicines

there are in the universe.

I think there is no point in going to

the infirmary to deliver my life

into the hands of some incompetent resident,

I need an experienced doctor.

So you're going to have a witch doctor look you over, take a bath with coarse

salt, a more alternative medicine.

Fabio? Are you all right?

Oh, I miss my godchild so much, you are the one I love the most!

Hi, godmother, let me introduce you, this is...

What an elegant man you married, my dear!

No, godmother, this isn't...

Huh? What a catch.

But look at this car.

It's like a spaceship.

And your mother was so worried thinking that your husband

was just some ordinary man, but look what a lovely man what a catch!

To protect you and protect your love. Welcome to the family!

Gee, thanks! It's an honor!

Godmother, no, that's not it...

We have to take a picture to preserve this lovely moment, come on.

Sorry, this is the liver.

I vomited so much it ended up in my foot, right?

This is the heart!

God, my heart sometimes beats in strange places...

Calm down, everything will be fine.

You always wanted to be a doctor, right? Since school

yeah. When I turned 18, I went off to do some work as a

model abroad and I became interested in oriental medicine.

You lived in Japan. Tokyo.

Exactly. Then I came back, applied for medical school...

He get on federal exam in third place.

Wow, you were guessing this as I was placing the needles on you?

This connection with the patient is very rare and very magical.

You are very sensitive, Fabio!

Yeah, that's how I am.

But it also helped that we studied in the same class at school.

What?

I want you to tell me everything.

How was the wedding?

She probably was very beautiful, right, Mr. Fabio?

Godmother, I want to make clear once and for all...

Look when your godchild walked into the church in the white dress and veil,

I started trembling, truly, I was frozen because I was so nervous.

She was the most beautiful bride I have ever seen in my life.

You are beatifull.

Can I do an ayurvedic massage?

Breathe and relax. Relax everything. Relax.

I'm getting tenser. It's pulling...

Relax. Release the air in five times.

I think I'll relax better on my back.

It makes it easier for me.

You have wide shoulders, they're great for exercising. Don't you like that?

Of course I do. I kind of let go because I ate too much at the wedding party,

but tomorrow I'll be in the gym!

It's so weird that we studied at the same school, right?

Funny I don't remember any Fabio in my class.

It's okay. I wouldn't remember me if I were you.

According to Ayurveda, when any of the five elements are in

unbalance, a disease process begins.

That is why you were sick...

Ah, sorry to bore you with all this talk.

Beto is always saying this no one is interested in this stuff.

No, perish the thought! I'm loving this story of the

elements, earth, water, rock, paper, scissors! Really!

You didn't have to say that to please me, I saw you were nearly sleeping.

Laura, I'm sleepy because for the first time

on this ship I'm feeling 100% calm and relaxed.

Oh, no, get off of me, senior citizens!

Excuse!

Dona Mirtes! Were you looking for me?

No, honey, I'm sorry, not I only dance with Danilinho.

He is younger, dances better and new flesh

is always more interesting, isn't it?

Wow, do you remember that you had to convince your father that I wasn't

going to drink and also had to take your friends home.

God, my friends turned out to be so boring.

And you turned out so beautiful. What is it?

I feel guilty for lying for leaving Fabio in the room

I loved being your husband for a few minutes.

Beto, please.

I mean it. What can I do, Mia? You move me.

What part of "this is my honeymoon" you didn't understand?

You want me to really ignore this crazy coincidence? And look, it's

obvious that Fabio isn't the man for you!

You're crazy to say something like that. You're being overbearing.

You don't even know Fabio!

But I know you very well.

You broke up with me because

you were a girl and I was the older, more experienced man.

You couldn't handle that.

Okay. But now you're an incredible woman, are you going to be scared?

Goodbye.

Incredible how you still smell the same.

- Mia? Z? - Hi, love!

Hi, love, how are you?

Wow, are you better?

I am... yeah (coughs) a little.

Kind of... Well, now that you mentioned it. I'm not.

My godmother said these are to protect you and protect our love.

You explained that I was sick.

I explained, she understood completely.

I'll call her later to thank her.

No! There's no need. She doesn't care about these formalities.

Of course I'm calling. Give me her phone number.

- Her phone doesn't work very well. - You sure?

- She lives in a distant area. - I'll send the e-mail.

There is no cell phone service or internet.

What a crazie!

I would like she love me justa little.

Than after, she will love me, than we will be back!

- You will be there, and metting! - I like!

You look so flushed, love,

it doesn't look like you were in the room all day.

Yeah, well, it's

I think the fever is coming back!

It could be malaria, dengue fever, stagnant water.

God, what karma. I can't get away from this looser even in the kitchen.

Hey, Suzana, don't butt into my life, okay?

Okay, okay. Listen, did you or didn't you find a way for us

to get some money from the passengers?

Mirtes isn't yielding me any money.

I haven't thought of anything because I was present at the birth of adultery!

Do you know where I left the silly blonde kid?

At the SPA!

Doing what? Buddhist badinage with that trophy wife of Beto Assuncao!

Come on, you think the worst about everybody.

They were there, lying down talking each others ears off, laughing like crazy!

And where are the spouses?

On land. This isn't going to have a good ending.

Wilson. I can see it! Wait a minute...

If there is something that these lazy women on cruises love is

a little tarot, some astrology.

Sounds good.

If I give you privileged information, can I keep 50%?

Deal!

Then pay attention.

Fabio was crazy for this Laura woman when she was a

teenager! He studied with her! Beto Assuncao is Mia's ex.

They, that is, the couples are doing the crossing.

Are you all right, girl?

Sure, why?

I think you look a little worn, your skin a little muddled,

I feel some confused feelings.

Don't you want me to read you the tarot cards?

There's no need, thanks.

The first one is free. Look, I know you don't want it, but

I can do a quick reading,

I can see a situation from the past that hasn't been put to rest,

but which is coming back now with full force.

Really?

I see betrayal now

I see an ex-boyfriend, a stolen hug... Death!

Take it easy, it can be the end f the rebirth of a love affair!

That's it. Sorry, to see more, I really have to do a proper reading.

How much is that?

200 dollars.

Hey, this gym isn't modern at all, there are bicycles in all.

This treadmill is modern, there's a computer.

Eh, boy... there is a computer.

I'm very hi. Today, very hi!

This boy, Great!

Let's go. Move on, is good?

Fabio! What a surprise finding you here. I didn't know you jogged!

Oh, I love it. And today I'm really very excited to run. I should run all day.

Look, if you allow me to give you a tip.

The tip. The tip is permited. What is a tip?

Set it to this speed here. On this inclination here.

For you who is just starting, it is important to maintain some

constancy, this speed is okay?

This is the speed at which you run?

No, but I've been running for 17 years, see?

But I've always been very active, I have a good structure.

I'm always on the run. Bam, bam,

running here and there.

I have a good frame, big thighs,

I run pretty good. You can adjust it to the same as yours.

- Ok. - 13.

Go straited!

Everything's fine. I'm going to market, get some DVD.

I went on some dancing place. I caught a lulling.

I'm going to home, to put some letters on mail box.

Good. That's good!

So, how are things with Mia?

That's good! Yesterday I was talking

that never being so happy.

Fine? But a marriage is a marriage.

Not even a discussion, a drag out fight?

If you'll allow me a tip.

Another one!? Go on.

Wow lots of tips.

You are the tip guy.

If one day she gets angry buy her a jewel with diamonds.

It can be simple, like a pendant or a solitaire.

That's all?

And traveling, of course.

Bed and breakfasts from the Charm Route, resorts yachts.

Mia is just like a child, isn't she?

She is easily distracted.

When you least expect it, she's already forgotten the fight.

Do you have some other tip, something under the 15 thousand dollars limit?

Of course I do, but you'll have to find them alone.

Easy, easy, are you all right?

I'm fine. Has the Sao Silvestre race started?

Look who's here. My helper.

What are you doing here all alone?

Are you trying to run away from your big spending wife? We're starting a

relaxing walk in a moment, coming?

I don't think so, right now I'm feeling kind of shitty, I'm going to stay here.

It's being hard to bear the presence

of my wife's big dick, athletic, millionaire

stud ex-boyfriend, right here in my honeymoon. It's hard.

Come on, kid. But feeling kind of shitty is just a basic prerequisite

for being a married man. You'll just have to learn how to live

with it. So the guy is...

Huge. It's actually a little scary. It's immense a ship, a vessel.

And you and Mia, how are you? And the other one, your crush from school?

You won't tell anyone? Don't talk about it out loud.

Who would I tell? My only friend here is you. I don't know anyone in this place.

Tell me everything, get it all off your chest, man!

Let's go, guys.

Concentration!

Any news?

Fabio didn't tell Mia that he got a relaxing massage at

the spa and by her turn, Mia did not tell Fabio that she

came back from Salvador very friendly with her ex.

This is going to end badly,

Suzana, because not only Beto has a big dick but he's addicted to sex.

And you tell me this without any preparation.

My God, this is wonderful. I'm even all sweaty.

You're so shameless, Suzana! Get away from me!

Go find a toilet to clean yourself.

Mia!

I'm just taking a walk...

It's lovely. Come in, there's room!

It's water from the Dead Sea. They say it's good for the skin.

My mother always says, the skin first.

You never came here?

No, you come here often?

Every day, get in already, you'll feel the difference.

Can the Dead Sea be really here?

I loved our dinner. You're such a fun couple.

I loved the invitation, too. Thanks.

Beto speaks of you with great tenderness.

I'm glad that's not an issue for you.

Of course not, we're both mature and balanced. That's how it is for you?

No! Truly, Fabio was a bit bothered when he found out

about Beto, because he is crazy about me.

Really? It didn't look like it.

It didn't look like he is crazy about me?

No! He didn't seem to be bothered!

And yesterday, at the spa, I also found him very sweet, calm.

Spa?

Yeah, he wasn't feeling too good because of his liver and

I did some detoxifying work with him using my hands.

He didn't tell you about it?

Oh, yeah, he did. Of course, now I remember.

Thanks! With your hands, huh? To detoxify?

And how is he, is he better?

He's fine. He's really great!

I'm glad, Fabio is such fun.

Yeah, great fun.

You're lucky, marrying a man with a sense of humor.

All these coincidences are funny.

All? There are a lot of them? There are more?

We used to study at the same school,

but I didn't realize it, Fabio is so different.

And married with my husband's ex.

It's a small world!

You studied together?

Look at this things. Excuse me!

Only ugly women here!

What is this shit?

I think you owe me an explanation!

Oh, yeah? Then you owe me too!

What? Have you checked the Internet today?

What is this I hear about you and Laura at the spa?

Laura is a doctor and I was feeling very sick when you left me behind

to die, remember?

The ship has its own doctors, remember?

But you'd rather look up you little friend to get a massage.

Meanwhile, my wife was introducing her husband to the family!

To an aunt that didn't even have a phone,

and she now has a Facebook account!

The only reason why I don't go

and bash his face in is because... because...

Because he didn't do anything.

He just gave me a ride.

My godmother never let me explain. If you look carefully,

you'll see I look awful in the picture, very unhappy.

You are laughing, Mia.

I'm laughing because I'm so nervous.

My godmother is a nut job, but I know who my husband is!

And I love him!

From now on we'll have a pact to only say the truth. Deal?

You have cellulite.

I once faked an orgasm with you.

You shore.

You have bad breath in the morning.

You have this fold under your arm that is kind of fat.

Look at your stomach.

You look beautiful when you're angry.

I get so angry that I can't get angry at you.

Attention! Lady and gentleman!

Be prepair to crossing the atlantic sea.

In 3 days we will be on Marrocos.

Honey, take it easy. We'll arrive in Casablanca tomorrow.

I'm calm, Mia.

Calmer now because it's been two days seven hours and five

minutes since we've had a fight!

Promise that nothing more is going to get in our way?

I promise!

Couldn't you have told me that you were going to meet

this friend of yours?

I wanted to surprise you, Mia, you're going to love him.

Titty! Fatso!

Give it to me, Head!

Ask me if I have candy?

You have candy?

Titty.

Stop. Let me introduce you, this is Mia,

the woman of my life. This here is Head.

Hey, Mia, how's tricks?

But tell me!

Have you seen anyone from the old gang?

And Bolado, have you seen him?

And Peida? Mario Maconha? Rodrigueira? Big Joe?

Fart, pum, fart men.

What is this? What a Casablanca?

Let's applaud the most beautiful woman in the world.

What are you doing now, Head?

Currently nothing.

Okay, and when you are doing something?

The thing is that with this busy life as a traveler,

I don't have a lot of time to work.

So I'm making due with my unemployment checks.

Wow cool!

Cool? The unemployment benefits are sinking Europe.

No boss can compete because the government pays.

People better to not do anything.

Great! The dream is becoming reality. Master, master...

Hey, Fabio, you know what I remembered now?

All of us classifying women in school by the size of their boobs.

Whait... 12!

Easy to win!

Remember, I was the fourth! I Was the fourth!

- I won of Gabi and Paulinha. - Paulinha, she is breast less.

What is this?

Take, take...

Loved meeting you Head.

It was great you came here to say hello to your friend.

Bye now.

Fabio didn't tell you? I'm going to travel with you guys.

- On the ship! - Let's go, she is very on time people.

I told you he was afraid of being alone in the cabin,

he's kind of tense with this high sea thing.

But it's just for tonight.

All right, you want me to sleep in the extra bed so you can

spoon with your friend Head?

Come on, Mia, it wasn't on purpose but I can't leave my friend alone.

First it was just to remember old times,

then he comes to torment us on the ship?

Pretty soon I'll find out that his name is Rubia and you have a son together.

Look, lady, let's make one thing clear. This kid who is before us called Fatso,

had a very difficult adolescence,

many problems and who was with him to help him?

Who?

You better believe it!

So now you see how he's much better?

Look, Mia, pay attention!

I won't let you take my man away from me you hear me?

Oh, My man.

- His joke! - Did you see the girl?

God! Look at her face!

Eh, the breast of my man.

Get around!

Whait Mia, just a joke. She don't get you humor.

I-Oh, Mia! Is refined!

Alone at last!

Listen, I had the impression that I saw muse of your

self-abuse, from fifth to eighth grade on the ship.

SHHHH, not so loud! I don't want Mia to know.

By the way, try to be nice. Mia and I have just made up,

things are much better.

Come on, she is a wonderful woman, a woman who is...

A pain in the ass!

She couldn't even receive your best friend properly!

Actually, for everything.

You married and we didn't even get drunk!

Come with me, my man.

Let's get drunk!

Look, I'm sorry to intrude, but I can see you like to know about the future.

I work with the future too. Tarot,

divination, coffee grinds, palm readings

I get it, look, thanks, I don't believe in this stuff.

It's not everyone who has this talent.

I've been perfecting my gifts for years.

Looking at you, I see a "woman from the past."

What?

Sir, I know women from a distance.

No way, I'm a married man.

My wife can come in at any moment.

Ok, since you don't want to know how your ex feels.

No, wait! Do I have a chance with her?

You know, I'm not feeling anything anymore?

Being sensitive requires some incentive.

Excuse.

Look, I see that you are on the same path.

You are going to reach a destination

and are going to arrive at the same time.

Really?

For just a little more, I can guide you better and...

Shure. Right here!

This is good! Is very good. Excuse me!

Yeah, she misses something that is very grandiose about you.

Something she doesn't have with the current spouse.

I can't see here is if it's character or goodness,

but really seems something palpable.

- Are you sure, Suzana? - Absolutely!

The tarot isn't giving us anything.

It's far from freeing us from this enforced togetherness,

this prison called a cruise ship. We have to go big.

You see that security guard over there? Stall him with some

story cause I'm going to gamble a bit. Or do you want to go?

You have more luck than me, Suzana, you married me. I married you,

I have terrible luck.

- Get out here! - Will be a winner..

Look the man, looking us!

Everything goes wrong with you!

You're nothing but a washed up old man,

like that grandfather of yours who used

to extort money from the alcoholic sister!

You know I can't handle it when you badmouth my family!

They're better than you cousins, those whores from Valinhos!

The only slut cousin was yours, the one who hung out at the overpass.

The Ema who lived with the bad bladeer.

- Oh right! - Ok!

After discharge, the things going to were?

To the gap.

Gap? Must be stunk.

My God, look at your wifey...

Stop! That's rightt.

Look at, is everyhing that we wanted.

To this very special day: To Esteban's bachelor party!

Eh, esteban, congratulations!

Today is to extrapolate! We lost more than one warrior.

We lost two warriors. Right, Anderson?

Stop, stop... I'm jealous.

That's why I don't want anyone touching my man.

But everything is included here.

But I'm "The Inclusive" Only one way.

French kiss, French Kiss...

Hey, I'm not fucking gay!

What is it, bro?

Is a lie!

We're kidding!

French kiss, French Kiss...

Thanks.

I tried...

No.

Listen, I just wanted...

Shut up!

Sorry, honey, are we late?

No, not at all!

Hey there, Mimia. Were you waiting for us?

Gee, that's so creative!

Actually, no, I was waiting for my husband for a romantic

dinner for two. Oh, do you want an extra chair for you?

Ih, so tense.

I thought you had cooled off.

I'll take a walk, see you.

Gee, honey you went too far.

Oh, really! There is a limit for everything.

Love, enough, you can trust me.

Head isn't going to bother us, I swear.

Tomorrow he's going to his own room, okay?

Take easy!

We are getting a competition on contest of belly!

Falling! Get out!

Get out here. Don't scrull my jump!

Hi, who are you again?

I'm Head.

I'm sharing a room with Mia and Fabio, Fatso.

Poor guys, come on, they're on their honeymoon!

Poor Fabio, who married this unbearable woman.

Because, I mean, come on, she could be more easygoing.

Hi, hi, hi, remember me?

You're Fabio's friend, right?

He's a doll!

Now, is me!

Judge, be prepair!

Go Fabio, is you!

Champ!

Corageos!

Fabio, I can understand why you work with children!

I have their mental age.

I was going to say their purity!

Yeah?

Ok.

Hey there, wifey!

There's going to be a super couples competition.

Unfortunately, my husband traded me for his asshole

friend and the Zen ass of his school crush.

I'm going to give you a tip, pay attention, dear.

When a man marries a woman, they also marry the family.

When the woman marries the man, she also married his friends.

So there's no point fighting against it.

I would rather have a manipulating

mother-in-law that this brainless friend...

You can be sure that you'll also have the manipulating

mother-in-law or your husband wouldn't act like

a 14-year-old beast in a 9-year-old body.

I get it, you had sex with my chambermaid, became

confused and decided to take it out on me, who have no

participation in any of this.

Go, leave, get out, entertainer, because I'm trying to see dolphins

and you're in my way!

Thurday only on Costa Fabulosda.

The big bale with mask.

I wanted to take the opportunity that

we're alone to talk about our relationship.

Sure, honey! A very propitious moment!

I actually think Head is nice, and I also want to meet Ass, Ear, Neck...

But I think we should do more romantic things.

We should try a little cooler hotel tomorrow when we get to Italy,

this one with a community bathroom that you reserved,

frankly... and going back to Brazil, I would like to

change your TV room into a closet because my clothes and your clothes...

Gorgeus! What a romantic!

I'm very festive..

Honey, can you get a drink for us? With ambrella, strawberry.

- Let's talk more! - Yes, talk about everything.

I want the carpet on the room.

Let's put the sofa and green cushion

you are crazzy?

Let's go there, come on!

Yeah, Mia will take a drink to me.

The best fantasy of the ship.

Won the prize!

Look at the commander!

Where you get the fantasy do convincent.

Weren't you in that gay group that was partying with Esteban?

Looks like a washing machine.

Look, we're really in shit.

Look, Captain Giuseppe, we really didn't get it see?

We thought it was a costume.

Eh Freitas?

The bous had a inappropriate behavior and need

stay by here.

- Have to stay here. - Just a little.

Amateur. Now learn from someone who knows. Zorro is going to play.

It's all or nothing now, Wilson, you go take a long walk,

take that bad luck away from me!

You're completely wrong. We either play together or we don't play.

- Dona Suzana, did you understood? - Ok!

- So, you go! - Do you believe?

- I'm talking! - 0k, nothing!

- But! - Oh, god!

Lie!

I told you, you bastard, that I was lucky!

I told you, you depraved woman, that I'm your lucky charm!

The man who leaves alone the most beautiful woman on the ship

has no concept of danger.

You're talking about yourself, aren't you?

Where did you leave your wife?

She is resting, will wake up early tomorrow to meditate.

My marriage is over, Mia. It was already at an end.

It was borring!

But then I found you again.

Look what the pirate here stole for you at a jewelry store today.

Are you crazy?

I'm kidding. I didn't steal it. I just bought it.

Come back to me, Mia?

You're a handsome, wealthy, nice smelling, wealthy guy...

Wealthy...

But I love my husband.

And where is he? Or do you think it's right to be alone like this

during your honeymoon?

I don't know where that bastard is and neither

that blockhead friend of his.

You know what? Let's dance!

Suzana, look at this!

I can't believe we won all this money, you crazy, wonderful woman!

We can finally leave this ship, get on with our lives, be rid of each other.

None of that, let's not confuse things. I was the one who won!

- You won! - Yeah, was me!

Suzana, don't be crazy now. The money will be shared between both of us.

Hmm, are you nervous now?

You sound like your uncle Cleber, unemployed, living off his wife.

Don't start, you know I can't take it!

How about your mother, who never worked, that useless ignorant woman!

- Talk about her. - She is better than

your ignorant, classless brother who says "nucular” and " dolphins”.

"Pei" as peru, brother. Came here right now, I will cath you!

And your cousin Rose, that pig with the nasty nails.

Your father is a beggar. This is a hot!

Oh, Wilson, I'm so horny! Take me, my stud. Come.

My God, Mia has been alone all this time... She's going to kill me!

They'll not let us in go back to the party...

This party is included in the package I'm paying!

You can not do this!

Lets's talk something!

Can't be enter, is not that way.

We talk, we just went.. I don't know.

How are you, we can enter here?

Eh, my dear, did you remember me?

Soi we are free, everything is right.

Our relationship with the captain is like family. Huh?

- He don't talk our idiom. - Don't talk?

His is strawed.

For God, I need metting Mia.

Stop, stop, I'm feel bad.

And I'm crazy to kiss you.

No, Beto, you're crazy?

- Mia, do you traveled? - Shut up, litte head.

Fabio...

Fabio!

Fabio!

Fabio!

Mia, I forgot!

- Fabio! - Wy did you?

You don't know what happened.

Fabio, wait. Wait.

Listen to me.

Let me explain me.

Fabio!

Fabio!

Fabio

I didn't do anything, he was the one who...

Oh, sure, Beto drank alone, danced alone, laughed alone!

He is so "self-sufficiently" badass, isn't he?

You disappeared from the party, left me alone once more to party

with you little friend,

as though you were a reckless single teenager!

I am a woman! Treat me like a woman!

Take it easy, Mia. It's over!

You can go back to your millionaire perfect lover boyfriend.

Go back to your "approved" Beto.

You ruined everything!

Great! Because you were the one who ruined this honeymoon!

Go on, you can go back to admiring you Zen little high school friend

with the perfect ass!

I didn't break up with you because I was a silly and insecure girl!

But because you think you own the world,

the guy who can have everything he wants!

But you're just an arrogant prick who only knows how to talk about himself!

You see! But that's why I love you! You tell me the truth!

And the truth is that I want nothing to do with you!

Because I was betrayed by my wife during my own

honeymoon, get it? Mia is her name.

Tis woman is a slut. SLU...

Right. Yeah. She's a slut.

She kissed another man, during our honey fucking moon.

I'm the cuckold of the world!

Look, Wilson.

Isn't that Fabio?

- Eh, folks! - Look at!

Stoked! Poor!

We caused this, Wilson.

We were so bitter and wanted to destroy other people's love...

We who, Suzana?

You were the one who read that Taiwan tarot cards to those poor guys

and ruined everyone's marriage.

And all for what? A thousand dollars?

What do you mean a thousand?

You only paid me 100! Weren't we splitting it 50/50?

I can't believe it.

Can you focus on the problem here: We need to help this boy!

You owe me 400 dollars.

Pipe down... Come on... Fabio

Laura, I need to tell you something.

Sure, love!

Mia... she... moves me...

That's normal, she's your ex!

Listen: I think I still like her.

That's normal. Liking is a good feeling...

Enough! Can you tell the truth for once in your life?

You're a selfish, individualistic, sexist bastard, but I enjoy the life

you afford me and I think you enjoy making me into your happy, stupid wife.

They say those are the marriages that really last!

Wow!

If you'd let me speak more, you'd remember that I can be smart as well.

And there's more: You'll never be naive, fun,

tender and candid like Fabio!

I think he and Mia deserve each other.

And I think we deserve each other as well...

Can you forgive me?

Try to cheer up, Fatso, pretty soon we’ll be in Italy,

full of women...

No joke, Head, leave me alone.

I need to talk with you.

Are you crazy, man?

Don't you have any shame?

You come here with that bastard millionaire face

I want to hear what he has to say.

Did you come to show your compassion with the cuckold?

Did you come to give me shopping tips to improve my mood?

Did you come to offer me a VIP dinner, but it's not quite

a tasting menu you're hungry for, is it?

Look, Fabio, I really did want Mia back, I kept after her, declared

myself to her... but she loves you.

Oh, all right, Beto, bla bla bla. Mia fucked up and now she sent you here...

See? Could you react to that?

No, right?

That is what I did to Mia.

And she didn't feel a thing because she loves your silly adolescent,

stupid, clueless, upbeat way!

Fuck, millionaires are all bisexual!

Mia!

Hi, Laura...

My, I've never seen a man so sad to see me.

I'm sorry, I just thought that

I came to say good-bye to you, Titty.

You remembered me?

I did! But I had to make an effort!

You became an interesting, sexy man,

almost unlike that boy at school.

Almost?

Almost because

you managed to keep the spark in your eyes from that boy.

Few guys manager that.

You're the best catch on this ship, Fabio.

You can have any woman you want.

Fabio, look at this.

Fabio, what are you doing?!

Me? Nothing much, just some calculations.

Calculations?

Yeah. Come with me. This ship is 60 meters tall, right?

I think it's 63.

Perfect. I weigh 80 kilos.

That means that with the impact on the water... force

equals mass over distance, 80 divided by 63... you can do some good damage.

Come on son, are you going to kill yourself because of a woman?

Actually, it's not even worth living because of a woman

imagine killing yourself.

There's no other way. How can I trust Mia again?

Honey, you don't have a choice.

You have to place emotion above reason.

Love above the facts.

Feelings above intelligence.

Love demands a certain stupidity honey, but one thing I can tell you:

It's better to have a woman who makes you suffer once in

a while than an ex-wife that makes you suffer every

single day. If you need it, you can count on us!

Is this? Not be that way.

Suzana, is bad we metting Mia by here?

We have to find out this girl!

Wy is your fault?

Oh, shut up! It is your fault.

It is your.

Seen questa donna?

You know dove is la donna?

Hai visto questa donna?

This is my wife. Dark skin, kind of thin, you haven't?

So, the boy let her go away alone can you believe it?

No, wait, nobody told her to kiss the other guy, Suzana!

Wilson, do you want to go against me in front of the Europeans, do you?

If you're angry, that's your problem!

She is happy...

No no.

- Mia! Mia! - Folks, look at here!

Mia!

Mia, is brasilian, she is losting by here.

Do you know?

- Yes! - Where, on TV?

- This woman? - Yes.

No. No in TV.

Prego, no.

We have to separate. Each one go mto one place.

I'm go to find out Mia.

- Let's go! - Let's go to here.

Whait!

Mia!

Excuse me, did you see a girl...

No, I didn't see.

- Marry me, I love you. - No!

And...

Nothing.

The city is small but it's not a neighborhood.

Let's stop a moment, Titty, pretty soon will distribute more.

Fabio? Whait!

She is there!

Where are you going, you nut?

- Let's go fastly. - Fabio!

Wait me!

Saint Anthony, how are you? I'm Fabio, husband of Mia.

She disappeared and I need to bring her back.

I swear I'll never leave her alone because of any friend,

I'll never say "cost-benefit"...

Mia!? I had this hope that you would still have some reason

to thank Saint Anthony!

Thank? I came to demand why the man of my life had to be precisely

an idiot, clueless, ham fisted, irresponsible and even so...

You love me!

I do!

Will you marry me, Mia? Now, with no hurry, no idealizations,

and forever?

Mia, do you accept his young man without a cent in his

pocket, who is afraid of being away from his mother and

hasn't learned how to dress as a man till this day?

I do!

Fabio, do you take this hard ass, spoiled, complaining,

compulsive consumer, pseudo intellectual like your wife?

I do!

Then I declare you two fools are going to be tied

together in a boring marriage for the rest of your lives

while I'm going go continue having sex with woman all over Europe.

Sorry. You can kiss the bride!

Never more I will be gone from your life.

For God, don't do that.

Because I'm taking clonazepam, and I'm almost a zumbi.

- What about our honey moon? - What about?

We get a married again.

We will talk about, later.

Now I will tell you. Beto is a bad Kisser.

How?

The Cabecga, is better kisser.

Did you kissed the Cabeca?

Was not as kiss, was only a stamp.

- Who wells did you kissed on this ship? - I kissed you, Mia..

And 3 older on first class,

and suddenly had kissed

may be a money that we can pay some

better hotel than the hostel that will be stay.

- Hostel? - I'm joking

we will stay on any hostel?

Can you imagine, if I will put my love on the hostel?

- Idiot! - We are going to stay on Maneba house.

Friend's mine living in Otaly. You will love him.

Mia, came back, here.

I no support any more, looking you on italy.

Somebody, please have a clonazepam, folks?