Original subtitles

THE BLACK FLAG FLIES OVER THE POT

EXHIBITION OF RAILWAYMEN ARTISTS

Hours of work went into this. - It's the result that counts.

- Dad, do you think you'll get a prize?

- Not a chance, The prizes always go to the painting section.

There's that one.

- The jury's deliberating.

They're talking about it, Simonet, they're talking about it.

- Are you just saying that to tease me, boss?

- I'm just saying they're talking about it.

- Imagine you getting a prize!

- Don't talk nonsense. - But M Volabruque says they're talking about it.

- It's all they're talking about

They were quite right to talk about it.

With 2,372 matches, a little glue and a lot of patience,

Dad had built his masterpiece.

La Belle Poule, a frigate of the first rank.

Exactly like the one that in 1840 returned Napoleon to us once and for all.

- You're right. Your triumph, Simonet,

is a page of new tracks in the golden book of Villeneuve-Saint-Georges.

It reflects on the entire marshalling yard, on the entire railways company.

- Bravo Antoine!

Your frigate, La Belle Poule, shall long sail in the minds of railwaymen-poets.

Thanks to it, your hitherto modest name is inextricably linked to that of the Emperor.

- Bravo.

- We heard the news! We've been waiting for you.

- Well Madame Simonet, you're famous now! - Yes, yes.

- How do you feel? - A first prize deserves first choice.

I opened some premium wine. - You're a hero, a real one!

- A great day, boy, a great day!

- Take it easy, you big ape.

- Fill the glasses.

- Doesn't this sudden glory feel strange to you?

- You'd have to ask Antoine. - It's not every day.

- I'd like some lemonade.

- Come on! Long live Villeneuve and sailing ships!

- Between the two of us, Simonet, now you've tasted the intoxication of the peaks,

what will be your next summit?

The Normandie? The Nautilus, the Titanic?

- A small boat, a small simple boat, M Volabruque.

- That doesn't sound like much. - But hold on. Life-size!

On Sundays, I'll take Pierrot fishing for gudgeon.

And we'll do little trips now and again. - Of course, little trips.

I'd like to go on little trips too, Mme Coulibeux.

- I'm a married woman, M Balloche.

- Everyone's married. What difference does that make?

- As Simonet envisages little trips, can't he envisage big ones?

He who fishes for gudgeon, can he not also fish for sea bream?

- Sea bream? in Villeneuve?

- In two years, my poor Simonet, Villeneuve will be no more.

No more choo choo … Retirement.

- We'll miss you, M Volabruque.

There are qualities we won't see again.

Fascism, capriciousness.

- Thank you, my friends. - Bad faith.

- Drinking.

- Thank you, thank you. - Well, I'm off to make the soup.

Don't you come home too late. - I only have to cross the street.

- But that could take a while. Come on, Pierrot.

- But I haven't had my lemonade. - There's some at home.

- Yeah, but it's not the same. - Never mind, come on!

- Bye Paulette. - Goodbye Mme Simonet.

- Forgive me for backtracking, but however much I think about it,

I absolutely can't see the connection between gudgeon and sea bream.

- Dieppe. - Dieppe?

- Dieppe.

I'm retiring to Dieppe.

To Dieppe, a fishing port.

Hear that, Simonet? When you talk about a fishing port, you talk about a boat.

A fishing boat.

I have in mind something modest, but seaworthy.

It's called a grondin.

My wife and I will live on board exclusively on profits from our fish products.

- Will Mme Volabruque agree to that?

- M Coulibeux.

I don't know how the Coulibeux operate, but at the Volabruques,

the men make the decisions and the women serve the soup.

- Bravo! - Now now, Camille.

You don’t need any more to drink.

- Where was I at? - At your grondin.

Oh yes. Devil take me if I don't catch ten kilos of sea bream a day.

I sell them for five francs a kilo.

In ten years, the boat is paid off and we share the profits.

- Who is 'we'? - You and me.

I provide the capital. You, the workforce.

And Simonet, the genius.

You must have been wearing climbing boots last night.

- Paulette, aspirin.

- And you made such a noise!

- Leave your father alone, you can see he's tired.

Right, aspirin.

- Sounded like you were taking your bed for a walk.

- If you have to talk, do it softly. My head is splitting.

- First prize gives you the right to have a drink. It's even a custom.

I'll never forget yesterday. - Nobody will.

- If only Volabruque could forget it.

- Volabruque?

- D'you know what he's got into his head?

That I build him a boat, no less.

He's right, you're the champion.

Not a model. A real one, life-size.

A grondin. He wants to fish for sea bream.

- Well!

We thought your boss was an idiot, but we were wrong.

- What did you just say? - I said we were wrong.

- The way things are going I'd better have two.

- The boat idea is really great.

- Can you see me building a grondin? - Well, you built a frigate.

- Don't you think it's time you went to school?

- I need to find a way to avoid it.

Volabruque's here for another two years.

If I don't build his grondin, I can forget promotion.

He's going to torture me.

- Go on, you're going to be late. - Torture you for first prize?

I can just hear France Culture!

If you don't build Volabruque's boat for him,

it's because you're chickening out.

- The boy's right.

Are you chickening out, Simonet?

- M Volabruque, what a surprise. - What a nice surprise.

- Come on in.

- You should know a railwayman never goes back on his word.

- The agreements between the builder and the skipper-fisherman,

that were concluded last night, in front of witnesses—

- In the euphoria of Beaujolais, M Volabruque.

And maybe Christopher Columbus' voyage was agreed on in the euphoria of Manzanilla?

- There's no point in talking, M Volabruque.

The truth is I'm incapable of building a boat.

Completely incapable.

It's like asking me to build an aeroplane.

If you … Antoine Simonet,

who built La Belle Poule,

are incapable of building a grondin, who then is capable of building one?

Tell me who?

- Come on, you. - Uncle Victor.

- Uncle Victor? But of course, Pierrot's right.

How can I think when my head's splitting? Uncle Victor!

- Who's Uncle Victor? - A sailor.

- You might even say a hero of the sea. - Yeah.

- The king of circumnavigation.

- What does that mean? - Well, the king of world tours.

My husband's uncle, Victor Ploubaz.

From Saint-Malo.

- That smells good, Saint-Malo.

It smells of the sea.

Well, we must call this gentleman today.

- Where? - In Saint-Malo!

- He's hardly ever there. Always crossing the Equator.

- Or rounding Cape Horn.

- It's simple, I haven't seen him since my first communion.

- I've never seen him.

Every time we tried to contact him, he was between Saint-Pierre and Miquelon.

- Between Barbados and Marie-Galante. - Oh, Pierrot, please.

Do you think that between regattas, he might give us two or three weeks?

- No, you can't build a grondin in three weeks.

- Well, in three weeks Uncle Victor would build you a transatlantic liner.

Look, was there a sailor on board?

- A sailor? Yes, he got off at Prairie.

- Oh my God!

- Let's go. - Come on, quick!

What are you doing here? We've been looking for you. - A sailor?

- Yes, he asked for you, then set off along the tracks. He looked really pissed off.

- What next! We'd better get a move on.

It wasn't between Barbados and Marie-Galante that Uncle got lost.

It was between Villeneuve-Saint-Georges and Villeneuve-Prairie.

- Uncle! - Victor!

- Ploubaz!

- No, wait for me!

- Well this is a good start. Thank you.

It's that way, I hope? - Yes, Uncle.

We told you Villeneuve, not Villeneuve-Prairie.

When it's Villeneuve-Prairie, we specify.

When we don't specify, it's always Villeneuve-Saint-Georges.

- We sometimes say Marshalling Yard. - When it's Prairie, we say Prairie.

- The railway topography seems a bit vague to me.

When I speak of the Cape of Good Hope, gentlemen,

it's a specific place on the globe, immutable and mapped.

Not a bazaar with multiple branches.

It all turned out right in the end.. - We'll get there.

- The bubbly got us through.

- To the health of the Captain. - To the health of the boat.

- I don't often uncork one of these, it's good.

- Yeah, it can't be bad. - Give me a rum.

- Don't you like mousseux?

- Excuse me, my dear sir, but except on steamers cruising past Agadir or Capri,

sparkling wine is not a specifically marine drink.

What's that? - Well, rum.

- Rum is bought in Kingston, my dear Madame.

I know there are some in Cuba and even in the Antilles,

but a trick like that doesn't work on me.

- Well, Camille? Where does your rum come from? - Well, Bercy.

- Sorry. - And now, Captain … the surprise.

- What's this? - The drawing of my grondin.

It's a rough drawing, a simple sketch. I don't claim to be an architect.

- What's wrong, Uncle? - Have I overstepped, Captain?

- I accepted an apology at the station.

I accepted one for the adulterated rum.

I will not accept one, my dear sir, for that.

- But look, Captain—

I didn't make a 200-mile journey, three of which were on foot, for people to make fun of me!

- Don't get angry, Uncle. - Can you explain?

- You want me to explain? Very well, I'll explain.

But I'm warning you …

I won't explain twice.

Boating being boating, and the five-masted schooner having fallen out of favour,

when it comes to boats, I see only one. Observe.

Seven metres fifty long.

Displacement, eight tonnes.

And it consists of a mast …

a jib …

and a Bermudian rig, there.

I'll grant you the spinnaker, if you want to play the gigolo in Saint-Tropez.

- Far from it, Captain. - That's better.

It's called a Marconi sloop. - And will it stand up to rough sea?

I know people, modesty aside, who've crossed the Atlantic in one.

- And even sailed around the world. - Exactly.

- A rum.

Do you really think fishing for mackerel in Dieppe—

- My dear sir, whether you fish for bleak or swordfish,

or dip your lines in the Dieppe swell or in the Gulf Stream,

that's your business!

Mine is to build a boat. To hell with it, that's enough.

Baron Bich expects me for the Sydney-Hobart race.

I'm heading north-northwest, and to you gentlemen, fair winds!

Having a helmsman like Uncle Ploubaz in Villeneuve was a real chance.

Come in.

You shouldn't have bothered, my dear.

- I didn't know if you'd want it here or downstairs.

Doesn't it feel strange sleeping in that?

- No no. It would be strange to sleep in that.

It's been forty years since I slept in a bed.

- Your wife has become used to it?

- Alas, a sailor's wife is a woman of sorrow.

I've always been a sea wanderer, an ocean runner.

And during that time, my poor Marie-Ange has spent three-quarters of her life

on the ramparts of Saint-Malo hoping for a return, watching for a sail.

Why are they yelling like that? - They're discussing the boat.

- Isn't there anywhere else?

- A grondin could be built anywhere … but a Marconi sloop,

That's a different story.

- And seven and a half metres isn't nothing, is it.

- That's two cars placed end-to-end. - Two cars or six bikes.

- Six bikes, that doesn't mean a thing, it's stupid.

- It's no more stupid than your two cars.

- But bikes and cars aren't units of measurement.

- Look, this is all just meaningless words..

We're not going to build this at the Renault factory,

nor at Vigorelli, nor in the street. - Nor in my dining room.

- We need a shed, I tell you, we need a shed.

- Come on now, gentlemen, take it easy I've already gone from grondin to Marconi sloop.

And now I need to rent a shed? Where can I go?

- My brother-in-law could rent you part of his garage in Bourg-la-Reine.

- Why not in the Jura?

- If I were you, boss, I'd get it done quickly.

I'll get rid of the premises at depot 26 then drop anchor here.

- Right! We'll build it here.

- What if we go over? We'll find ourselves in the schoolmaster's garden!

- I don't recommend that.

- What do you mean, if we go over?

- It can happen. - On the railway maybe.

But according to the criteria of the International Yacht Racing Union,

a seven and a half metre boat is a seven and a half metre boat.

Twenty-four feet. And it never goes over.

And I'd like not to have to say that it again.

That's fine … Stop!

At the end of the week, the materials were delivered.

This time, Captain Ploubaz was going to be able to show his art.

Just by looking at him, we could tell it would be tough going.

And we weren't wrong. Our uncle was a leader of men.

Just like Long John Silver in Treasure Island.

There were days I thought Uncle Victor looked like him, like John Silver.

I even thought that Volabruque's boat ought to be called the Hispaniola.

Only, I didn't dare tell anyone about the Hispaniola.

It was a really nice name though.

Well, Simonet? Always one step ahead?

That's what's annoying about being a kid, you can never say anything.

Always on the go, our uncle. To the point of forgetting to eat and drink.

If you don't improve productivity, you'll have to do double shifts or work overnight. Got it?

If he was taking so much trouble, it's because he only thought about the boat.

Deep down, that was all everyone in the Marshalling Yard was thinking about.

It's going to be really nice.

- I've done better.

But then I did have a real workforce.

- Why? Aren't Dad's friends any good?

- No, I'm not accusing anyone.

Besides, it's not just a matter of workforce, but climate, environment.

Villeneuve-Saint-Georges isn't the birthplace of the schooner.

You should see Key West or Brisbane.

See the forest of masts, halyards and shrouds in the port of Brisbane.

- Where's Brisbane? - In Australia, at the end of the world.

- Hey, Pierrot, don't you think it's time you went to bed?

- Yes, I'm going.

- Come on, Pierrot, go to bed! - Go on, off you go.

- Well, good night, Uncle.

- Good night, my boy.

- Victor? -What?

- Not going to sleep?

- I never sleep, I think.

- I don't know if he never sleeps, he just keeps the rest of us from sleeping.

Eight hours on the boat, eight hours on the trains.

Multiplied by seven that's over a hundred hours of work.

- You're right. It's worse than before May.

- That's the price of a dream.

- What did you say?

- All we dream about is this fucking boat.

- I dream of seeing it finished, yes.

- It's not only that, Antoine. Be fair, it's not only that.

- No, it's not only that!

- Because of planing gunwale rails, nailing chines and fixing bulwark plating,

I don't even think about my bike now.

- That can't be true? - Yes, Monsieur.

I've been riding with a loose pedal for two weeks now.

And you know what? I don't care. Amazing, no?

- And my wife talking about divorce after twenty years of happiness.

Isn't that amazing?

- Since we're talking about it, I'll tell you something.

The Marconi sloop is eating at my sleep and Uncle Ploubaz is getting on my nerves.

But I have to admit, Marcel,

there are evenings in the garden, I can hear the sea just as I can see you.

- I'm sure you're not the only one.

Are you resting?

- There's never any rest. When it's not your arms, it's your head.

I was calculating the keel and the draught.

If I were at the helm, there wouldn't be a problem, I'd sacrifice everything to speed.

But with the stationmaster, when he finds himself in twelve-metre waves, I don't know if you realize …

- Has that ever happened to you?

- Of course it's happened to me, but I like that, storms are my thing.

- Like Long John Silver. - Who's that?

- A guy like you, wooden leg, parrot on his shoulder.

Have you never read Treasure Island?

Oh, you know, I never had much time for reading.

I was fourteen, barely out of school, when I set sail for Newfoundland.

At sixteen I passed Cape Horn for the first time.

And then, since I'm class of 24, I did five years in the Royal Navy.

And then, when I came back, I was a whaling skipper.

I hunted cetaceans in the Arctic. That's where I met Charcot, by the way.

And later, when I was about 40, I developed a taste for warm seas.

So I went back up towards the sun, Manila, Surabaya, the Tropic of Cancer.

- Maybe you passed Turtle Island one day?

- It's possible, I sailed past everything.

I'd rather tell you that through travelling, I'd become a legend without knowing it.

All the billionaires had their eye on me. They expected me in Miami, Santa Barbara, Key West.

Besides, it was from that time on that I started winning all the cups.

In Saint-Malo, I have a cabinet full of them.

There's more, but we have to get going.

Because I know them.

As soon as my back is turned, these gentlemen tell their life stories.

A little break, gentlemen.

My dear M Volabruque, I have absolutely nothing against wildcat strikes or coffee breaks,

but if you want to set sail before the equinox storms,

you should take your staff in hand.

- You're right.

Come on, men, back to work!

If I want to set sail before the equinox storms,

we mustn't get soft.

- I ordered a galley for us!

- He treats us worse than convicts, worse!

Uncle Victor, without wanting to distract you from your work …

- What?

- Tonight, Antoine and I have an appointment with the school principal.

It's about Pierrot, he's not working at all now, so maybe … we'll eat a little late.

- Not me.

Can you imagine, my dear Paulette, when a man has travelled the world like Victor Ploubaz,

he learned long ago to cook his own soup.

- Do you cook as well?

- Yes, and on tonight's menu spare ribs and chili con carne.

That'll be a change from the usual.

Pierrot!

You know the kitchen, do you know where the Cayenne pepper is?

Pierrot!

Well, Pierrot, you might answer me.

What are you doing there? - I'm doing my algebra.

Hey, do you take me for a kid?

Bibi, can you smell something? It smells like there's a fire.

- It smells like gas.

- It's all burnt! - Take a rag, you're going to burn yourself.

- Here, hold this for me.

- Here’s Cap’n Flint, said Long John Silver, pointing at the parrot.

I calls my parrot Cap’n Flint, after the famous buccaneer.

- I thought he'd just been killed. - No, it's Black Dog who's just been killed.

- Ah, yes. Go on.

- Now that bird is, maybe, 200 years old.

And if anybody’s seen more wickedness, it must be the devil himself.

- What's the matter with you? What are you two doing here?

- Well, algebra. - Yes, I asked Uncle to help me.

- Have you seen the kitchen? - What's wrong with the kitchen?

- Well, all that's left to do clean everything. - Yes.

- Listen, my dear, with the boat, cooking and algebra, wouldn't you like me to clean too?

And that's it, everything's in place.

- What's going on? - Ah, Captain, it's all done.

- Done, you say? That's your opinion.

Well my answer is fittings, paint, masts, sails.

It's not finished, dear chap, it's only just started!

- Perfect!

A mast changes everything. I'd never have believed it.

- Impressive.

- All that's missing is the sails, Boss.

When will they arrive, M Volabruque? The beautiful sails from Manila?

- I wanted to talk to you about that, my friend. I'm a bit behind with the payments.

The purchase of the sails, especially in the quality required by the captain,

is causing me problems.

- Do you have any family property? - Family property?

- Yes, stocks and shares, buildings, farms, land, all that.

- Well, I mean … yes and no.

My wife owns a pasture in Normandy, near Bernay.

Two hectares of apple trees.

- You need to decide, M Volabruque, if you want to catch mackerel or pick apples.

- You're right. Come on, I'll sell Mme Volabruque's apple trees,

and if that's not enough, I'll clean out her savings account.

And long live sailing! - Excuse me, Alexandre …

Come home with me and have a chat about all this.

- Mme Volabruque, I presume. - I'll be back in five minutes.

That was a long five minutes.

Mme Volabruque must have given him a hard time.

Damn!

It's an embargo.

She's taking away everything.

Chequebook, cash, tobacco, everything.

Even the car, in case I sell the petrol or the tyres.

Total blockade.

No sails, my good friends, no more boat.

I would have liked, Captain, to avoid such a conclusion.

- I've seen worse, M Volabruque.

No adventures without misadventures.

- Even so, now we've come this far.

- The colours of the Marshalling Yard won't be waving in the port of Dieppe, boys.

- I admit I foresaw a more noble destiny there.

- What was that? - Let's not re-open the wounds.

- What are we going to do with it? Little benches?

- Or firewood for the old people in the hospice?

- Right!

It's no longer a helmsman you need, it's a lumberjack.

Farewell, gentlemen. - Are you going to find your billionaires?

- What billionaires? - The ones in Miami.

The ones who have enough money to finish a boat and to buy an old sea dog.

- No one can buy Victor Ploubaz, young man.

- Pierrot, apologise to our uncle right now!

I'm talking to you, Pierrot!

- But the boy has nothing to apologise for. Deep down, he's the one who's right.

Absolutely right.

I'm going to go and extort money from these usurpers of glory.

And I'm going to bargain like an Arab.

The sails against the America's Cup.

The winches against the Bermuda Race.

The halyards and shrouds against Sidney-Hobart.

I'm going to be demonic.

Well M Ploubaz, are you back? - Yes.

PLOUBAZ HARBOUR SHOP

Ah, there you are again, you bastard.

- Please, Marie-Ange, behave yourself. If anyone heard you, you'd look pretty bad.

Where have you been this time, you creep? What stories have you been telling?

Who have you been lying to?

- My dear, you probably won't believe me, but I've been with my family.

- What family? You always told me you were from Public Assistance.

A child reared by the Army, you forget. The School of Cabin Boys, the Fishermen of Iceland.

- That doesn't stop me having a nephew. A nephew who works on the railway.

- A nephew you just invented a second ago.

As you'll have invented something else. To lie even more.

Idiot! - Oh yes, idiot.

- What? - I said idiot.

You see, Marie-Ange, my great weakness is to believe in the goodness of humanity, its generosity.

- Go and put on your overalls, that'd be better. There are haricot beans to sort.

Oh yes, there are haricot beans. There are haricot beans, haricot beans.

- Open the door for me, so you won't have come back for nothing.

Because there are also lentils to sort.

When I think …When I think that I left a hidalgo for you.

- You call him a hidalgo, I call him a dago.

- A dago? A dago who owned a hacienda in the heart of Brazil!

My dear, with your level of education to think Caracas is the capital of Brazil … fair enough.

But it's alarming that at your age, to confuse a hacienda with a gambling den.

- If you came back to make fun of me— - No.

To offer you a way out and tear you away from your mediocrity.

A Marconi sloop. Keeled, decked, ready. All that's missing are the sails.

It's yours for a million.

Look at me, Victor.

You wouldn't dare, would you?

- What wouldn't I dare?

- Talk to me about a boat. - Why not?

- Raising the galleon, does that ring a bell? The galleon full of gold off the coast of La Ciotat?

The Minotaur. I haven't forgotten the name, it cost me my dowry.

- You call that a dowry?

Are you starting again? Monsieur knew all about it.

The location of the wreck, the depth, even the speed of the currents.

Instead of a wreck, we found a bed of mussels. I ended up broke.

- Well sweetheart, now's your chance never to be broke again.

We hoist the mainsail, we organize cruises on the Seine,

introducing the exhilaration of regattas to suburban populations.

And the boat will be called Marie-Ange.

Oh yes, yes, I insist on it.

I can see it now. Tacking along by the low-rent blocks, reefing past the shanty towns,

slicing through the detergent foam, while we fill our pockets.

- You think so? - I'm sure of it.

- Really? - Yeah.

- And I'm listening to him … He's gonna drive me crazy, the idiot!

I'd rather tell you now, for board and lodging, wine and Pernod,

you'll have to find someone else!

- But my angel, my angel!

Definitely a new trend.

The Blue Waves

Everyone can lead their own life as they please.

I simply believe my sister wasn't made for you.

I don't claim to be a clairvoyant.

- And yet you are, dear Séverine. - No.

But I am a little crazy. That helps to understand some men.

If I tell you, Victor, that I happen to be a very beautiful woman.

- You are, Séverine.

- In general, it's in a spa town in Austria.

Why in Austria? - Why not?

- It's usually in summer, around six in the evening.

I'm wearing a dress with ruffles, and I'm climbing a path deep in the trees.

I think they're lime trees.

The evenings I walk past these lime trees must be when you cross the Caribbean, Victor.

- I cross the Caribbean more and more.

- And Marie-Ange, less and less. - No more.

I suggested she create a sailing school on the Seine,

because now I have a boat. Just by talking about it, anything can happen.

Well, she had a crazy fit. Does that amuse you?

- I'm thinking of another river project.

One that's thirty years old.

The showboat on the Marne.

The Séverine, that would have been great. - Yes, well …

- Yes! A women's orchestra, a restaurant, an attraction.

With your talent and my physique, we could have made a fortune in a year.

I wouldn't have any trouble buying my sails today.

- M'selle, the little one has measles. The doctor is due to come at eight o'clock.

So, if you don't need anything more from me … - No, no, I'll close up. Good night, Fernand.

- Good night, M Ploubaz. - Good night, Fernand.

- Are these sails very important?

- Well you might say on a sailboat, they're essential.

- I was talking about the price.

- They're cheap … I don't know. … 10,000 francs.

And you didn't talk about it to … to my sister?

- Of course I talked to her about it. But right away, it was blackmail.

She wanted me to sort haricot beans.

I can't stand haricots any more, all beans, white or green.

I can't stand the beans, the grocery store, nor the grocer.

When you walked under your lime trees, Séverine, you walked playing the violin, so …

so there's … there's a beginning, a trigger.

Me? I round Cape Horn surrounded by packets of chicory and cans of tuna fish.

I can't take any more of that. No more! No more!!

- Maybe you chose the wrong path thirty years ago.

Above all, I chose the wrong sister, dear Séverine.

And now, gentlemen, I'm going to answer the question you're all asking yourselves.

And like any good sailor, I'll answer it realistically.

One adventure is over, another begins.

- Bravo, bravo!

With this sloop, named the Cerf-Volant in homage to Captain Flint's famous schooner,

we'll be able to skim the waters of Villeneuve Marshalling Yard,

and if we have to, sail all the way to Le Havre.

But here is my itinerary. My own.

The South-Southwest Atlantic, Cape Horn. Diagonally across The Pacific.

And you don't hoist the Grand Pavois before Port Arthur. All that without a stopover.

Hooray! - Bravo, bravo!

- He's got a lot of energy, the bloke from Saint-Malo.

- He's from Surcouf country.

Modern times demand new men.

- Alain Gerbault had his moment, Éric Tabarly too. But they were sailors.

You, Antoine Simonet, will be the first railwayman of the sea.

- Bravo, bravo,!

- Nobody wants to harm you, darling.

Uncle was joking. - Really?

He never jokes. He came back to us crazier than when he left!

Why can't he go to Port Arthur himself?

I wouldn't mind if the question was only impertinent, but it's stupid too.

Personally, I've harvested enough glory.

And I don't see what one more round the world trip would add to my list of achievements.

- That's obvious. - Come on.

- Do you really think Antoine's capable of sailing the seas?

- Why not? He has two legs and two arms. What does Tabarly have that he doesn't?

- No, no, no and no!

- But why not?

Tabarly doesn't have two arms and two legs like everyone else?

- I'm not talking about Tabarly. I'm talking about me.

- What? You don't have two arms and two legs?

- I also have two feet and you're gonna feel one of them in the arse!

- Paulette, witnessing such an outburst of violence makes you wonder why he wanted the boat.

It was Volabruque who wanted it, to fish for mackerel.

I just want to grow potatoes.

- Yeah, there's some truth to that, undeniably.

- He can't live locked up like that, it's not healthy.

- He's been up there for two days now.

- I put a tray outside the door. He hasn't even touched it.

- Maybe he'd rather starve than drown.

You should talk to him, Captain. Your prestige, your authority would carry more weight than us.

- Listen, Antoine, you're getting the wrong idea about the sea.

A little boat trip isn't the end of the world, for heaven's sake.

- Port Arthur, do you have any idea?

But why do you think that more things will happen between Le Havre and Port Arthur,

than between Point du Jour and Île Saint-Louis? Well?

Antoine, do you think I'm crazy? - Oh, Uncle!

- Or maybe I'm an idiot? - Oh, Uncle!

Or worse, I'm an amateur? - Oh, Uncle!

- Right, now you listen to me. - Yes, Uncle.

- Let's start with the ABC.

Left is port, right is starboard.

- Well, without being smart, I knew that. - Me too.

- You think you know! You'll find that out when you face your first cyclone.

The word travelled beyond my thoughts, Antoine.

There are no more cyclones anywhere.

That, I promise you.

- What about the Azores? You think I don't listen to the radio?

- Yes, well, you'd be better listening to me.

Since you're not making a stopover, what the hell would you be doing in the Azores?

I'm asking you.

- Are you sure?

Well! I've been told you're going to sail around the world, M Simonet?

- We're going to try, Professor.

- He has no doubts.

- Well, are you ready to hoist? - Ready!

- Ho-oist!

Hey, that's a strong wind!

- That's barely Force Two.

Force Three maximum.

- Victor! The boat's moving! - Bring down the sail!

- But I can't! The varnish must have stuck the keys to the sleeves!

- So, cut the bolt-rope quickly! - What?

- Cut the string, you bloody idiot!

Drop the anchor! - What?

Drop the anchor, I tell you! For God's sake, drop the anchor!

- You see? I can't even do it in the garden!

- Yes you can! Because with a tailwind and houses all around, you started with the hardest part!

And you did very well!

- Captain Ploubaz!

Rather than Saint-Malo, are you sure you haven't escaped from the St Anne asylum instead?

- A cul-de-sac …

40 metres long …

and eight metres wide …

is bordered on three sides …

by a pavement one metre 40 wide.

What are the length and width of the pavement?

M Simonet!

May I, without being suspected of petty feelings,

enquire of you what it is you are drawing?

A flag, sir.

A black flag!

Out!

- And now Pierrot's been expelled!

- What?

- I'm telling you Pierrot got kicked out!

And right in the middle of term!

- Well, that's an arbitrary decision,

One you seem to hold me responsible for, by the way.

Is that a reasonable impression? - You could say that!

- Well that's admirable.

Listen, Victor, it's one to put into the heads of all the people of Villeneuve,

the notion of sending me to Port Arthur without a stopover. That's bad enough.

But to put into Pierrot's head to have me return via Turtle Island to bring back treasure,

don't you think you're going too far?

- I didn't know about Treasure Island before your son told me about it.

- Did you talk about it or not? - But he started it!

What's wrong? - Give me a brick.

Do you know why he's been expelled?

He was drawing the black flag of anarchy in class.

- Anarchy, anarchy …

The Jolly Roger, a skull with two shinbones on a black background.

That's not the beggars' flag, it's the buccaneers'!

- If you like.

Anyway, since you've been here Pierrot's been unbearable.

Uncle here, Uncle there, you should talk to him.

- But when I talk to him, you yell at me! - It depends on what you're talking about.

- Right, well, I'm off. - You're leaving?

I have to use the concrete while it's fresh.

I also have to strike while the iron is hot.

- This is really cool. It's like being in the cabin of a transatlantic liner.

- Hey, instead of messing around in that thing, come here so I can talk to you.

- What do you want to tell me?

- I'd like to know if you want to study, yes or no.

- Have you done any studying? - Me, me, me …

But your father's got his Certificate. - Well, that's why.

- That's why what?

- Dad's working hard at the Railways while you're going around the world.

I want to go around the world.

- You wouldn't want to embark at eleven, would you?

- Well, you told me you were coming back from Newfoundland at fourteen.

- Yes, well, that, there's … there's what I say, and then …

- What? - Nothing.

What about your mother's sorrow?

Have you thought about your poor mother's sorrow if you ever were lost with all hands?

- But my mother doesn't love me. - Come on, Pierrot, that's hard.

- This afternoon she wouldn't give me three francs fifty to go to the cinema.

To see The King's Pirate. You call that love?

- You've got some nerve, you know?

You get kicked out of school and you want rewards.

Why not a bonus while you're at it?

What's your … your pirate thing, then?

It would have been a crime to miss it, don't you agree?

When the one-armed man sticks his hook in the sail and dives off the mainmast.

It's really great.

- And when the Bosco cuts off the Chinese man's head, that's not bad either.

Where do you think they filmed the storm?

- Off the coast of Maracaibo. I recognized the area.

- In the battle, those guys were strong.

But I heard you laughing. Did you think the scene was too fake?

I'm not saying everything's fake, but when it comes to the sea, I won't have the slightest mistake.

Total honesty.

Are you going to tell me it wasn't great when he kissed the Commodore's daughter?

- Well, that, you see, is not what I prefer.

- Here, Pierrot, switch the light on.

- What's that?

Well, a sextant.

- A sextant, a sextant, of course, it's a sextant. But I mean, what's it doing there?

- Volabruque brought it. Just as you were leaving.

- Volabruque, Volabruque! He doesn't know anything, Volabruque!

- The railwaymen did a collection and it seems everyone contributed.

- well, if everyone chipped in, that's because everyone believes in it.

- So how does it work?

- It's based on calculating angles relative to the Greenwich meridian.

- So show us. - I'm telling you, it's mathematics.

So, I don't see what you could understand given the grades you get in algebra, am I right?

- Thanks, Victor.

If you hadn't been expelled, he'd have explained everything to you.

The meridians, the angles, everything.

Isn't that so, Victor? - Naturally.

- But there's no reason for you to punish me.

Not to mention that out on the Atlantic, I'll have to take sightings.

I'll have to calculate my angles.

- Listen to me carefully, Antoine. Do I have to get angry?

You, my student, soon to be my disciple, would you think it normal for me to take a sighting?

Would you find that normal? - Well yes.

- For God's sake! Does it occur to you that you need the sun above and the horizon in front of you?

I mean the sun and the horizon, not your chandelier and your cupboard.

Well?

Can you see the sun? - So what?

- The horizon's clear all the way to Choisy. Great weather to take a sighting.

- That's what I was saying to Uncle. - And what was my answer?

- That we don't take a sighting according to the whims of the weather.

- Exactly, we take a sighting when we need to do it.

- And when we need to do it and we don't know how to do it, what do we do?

Oh, I beg you, let me manage your studies.

- Of course, meanwhile, if you want to take a sighting, you can always learn from a book.

- Fine, if that's how you want it, let's go.

But I warn you, geometry in space, trigonometry, table of logarithms …

Watch your brain.

- What do you think about here?

- We can't see anything. What we need is height.

- There aren't many heights at sea.

- Well then, if you know everything better than me, you can just explain it to your father.

- Well? Isn't that good?

- It's too low, I don't have any vanishing lines.

- What about the bridge, would that work? - Too high, it would distort the calculations.

- There's some vanishing lines, you should like that.

- No!

But since we're tinkering, let's tinker.

There, what's this fucking screw?

Yes, a model thirty-two.

It's been at least twenty years since I used such an antique.

- Don't you ever take a sighting in Sydney-Hobart?

- Of course, but there, with a double-reading electromagnetic compass, that's something else.

Is that you, Pierrot?

- Is the marmoset in town? - Excuse me?

- Are you the wife of the sea railwayman?

The future widow?

- Madame … - Ploubaz.

- Won't the Captain be happy!

Good day to you, Aunt. Do come in.

Come in, please. This way.

This is lovely!

- Dear oh dear, this is really crap.

Anyway, let's go. Right!

You look at a given point. - What's a given point?

- Well, it's a given point. A given point is a given point.

It's a point you choose arbitrarily.

- Not easy to understand. - Do you think it's easy to explain?

Take Volabruque's house, if that suits you.

So, I lower my thing twenty-five degrees.

- Why twenty-five?

- Listen, if you're interrupting and trying to confuse me all the time, don't.

Twenty-five, twenty-five or thirty, I don't know, somewhere in those numbers.

And there's a difference to calculate, but it slipped my mind.

Oh damn.

On the Jean Bart, they did it like that.

- Who? - Well, the others.

- I promised your mother you'd go to the market with her.

She must be waiting for you.

- I swear, you're doing it on purpose. Just when Uncle was about to explain to us.

- Just go.

Uncle Victor …

You've never taken a sighting.

- No.

- Uncle Victor …

Have you ever seen the sea?

- Now you're exaggerating, really. Really.

- Have you ever been on it?

- have I been on it? I spent five years on the Jean Bart.

- Are you sure? - Oh well, yes, I'm sure of that.

But as a cook.

- A cook?

- Yes, but that wasn't written on his beret.

Blue collar and red pompom …

He spoke well … and waltzed backwards.

He waltzed me out of everything, including my dowry.

- But he was always very honest with us.

Too much so even, he must be the one out of pocket.

- Did Victor pay for something? - Well yes, he bought the sails.

- In that case, he scammed my stupid sister.

A sailor's girl. She's been crazy about him for thirty years.

What worries me in your case is the boat.

Until now, there was never a boat involved.

Believe me, my girl, send the whole lot on the Saint-Malo train before the real mess starts.

The galleon full of gold, the sunken city, Rommel's treasure, I've heard it all.

- Is anyone there? - It's me.

Dad said we're going to the market.

- My son, Pierrot.

- The cabin boy, no doubt.

- This is a friend of Uncle Victor.

- Oh I see … Well that's not all.

I have to open my shop at eight o'clock.

You'll tell the sea eagle that his pelican came.

Remember, if you want to keep a father for your child,

and save your silverware, full speed backwards!

- I'll go with you.

- Goodbye, Madame.

- Basically, the main culprit in all this, there's only one. Your kid.

With his films and his books, he made me a liar.

- Is it possible you were one already?

- No, not so much.

What I don't understand is how you managed the boat.

Because after all, it's here.

- That was a carpenter from Saint-Malo who gave me the drawing.

I learned everything by heart.

I wrote down the words I couldn't remember. Here.

Reminders everywhere. That's what I get by with.

- But that won't help get me out of the doldrums.

- Yes, but we can't go back now because of Pierrot.

I've become a god for him.

I don't know, Long Silver Jones, the King's Pirate.

I'm a comic strip and an adventure story all by myself.

- If you're a comic strip why am I the one you send to slaughter?

- I'll go with you. - To take a sighting?

- You're right, I'll go by myself.

Turtle Island, Captain Flint's treasure.

I'll tack in the wind of my own words …

And I'll tack on Pierrot's dreams.

- It's not to Turtle Island you're going to, Uncle.

It's death.

Stupid things happen if you keep talking about them!

Now all we have to do is test it.

- Maybe the Captain will give us a little demonstration?

- He'll even pull out the big guns, won't you, Captain?

- Take it easy, gentlemen, take it easy. First the boat has to mature.

Let it get used to the sea, as they say.

- Yes, that might be better. - Yeah.

If the Captain says it has to get used to the sea, it's because it has to get used to the sea.

- It'll never get used to the sea if we don't work the winches,

the pulleys, the cleats and the shackles.

- You think so? - Do you want me to give you an example?

It's like running in a car. - That's it exactly, my dear chap, exactly.

- Do you have amnesia? - There's not a ripple on the water.

There's no risk.

Fine. To please you, gentlemen, we're going to tack a few times.

But I warn you, no fantasies, no stunts.

Anyway, Antoine, if you see me starting to take risks, you stop me.

- Old fool. - I'm coming with you!

- Oh no you're not. - Don't worry, Paulette, my dear.

In front of Choisy, I tack luff to luff and I go upwind.

Get out the glasses, we'll be back for the aperitif.

This is the life, eh?

What do you think, sailor? - Nothing yet.

I have to say, things don't seem to be going too badly for now.

♪ Good bye farewell, good bye farewell ♪ - Maybe we were imagining things?

We were always expecting the worst.

♪ Hooray! Oh Mexico! ♪

♪ And we'll sail to Valparaiso ♪ ♪ Farewell ♪

I'd give more sail if I were you.

You know, at this speed, Choisy doesn't seem far enough.

What if we sail on to Charenton? - Just what I was going to say.

♪ Good bye farewell, good bye farewell ♪

♪ Hooray! Oh Mexico! ♪

TWENTY THOUSAND LEAGUES UNDER THE SEA Jules Verne

Tell me … will going upwind, as you suggest, be more difficult?

And against the current, will be be going more slowly?

- Well yes, much slower.

If we want to get home for dinner, perhaps we should turn back.

- What do you think I've been trying to do for the last half hour?

I'd like to see Long Silver John in a fix like this.

- Who are you talking about? - A sailor.

A sailor with a wooden leg and a parrot on his shoulder.

Have you got the flares ready? - Do you think we're going to need them?

- I don't think anything, I'm planning ahead. That's why I'm in charge.

- I'm starting to get worried.

- If it was Dad by himself, I'd understand. But with Uncle at the helm …

- What's the matter with you? - Didn't you see?

- Lave that alone, for God's sake, it's not a toy!

- And is that a toy coming at us?

What? What's coming? What's coming?

- watch where you're going! Look out for the Belgians!

Are you crazy?

They're stupid. They can't see properly, they're in a bad way!

- I think we've just been called stupid.

- Just a sailor mouthing off.

- The bridge!

- What bridge? - The mast!

- What about the mast?

Don't panic!

On the Titanic, the chaos was the result of panic!

- It's all white, Victor, where are we?

It's all white! - Don't panic, I tell you.

Go and get the flares.

The red ones! - Get this into your head. I've had enough..

I'm getting out of here!

I said a red one!

The yellow ones mean there's cholera on board.

- Well there is cholera on board!

- Serves you right!

There. Now all we have to do is wait to be rescued.

Antoine!

- What now?

That's it this time. We'll never see Villeneuve again.

Damn it!

Hey, Victor. - What?

There's no more factories. No more houses, nothing.

Where are we?

Hopefully we haven't reached the estuary. Because after the estuary …

- Come on, hold tight, we're going to run aground.

Not glorious, but as you say, after the estuary …?

Hey, Victor.

We didn't moor it.

- So what? Are you afraid we won't find it?

It's getting late. What are we going to say when we get home?

- Do you always wear life jackets when you go for an evening walk?

- We're from River Safety. Intervention Brigade.

We just spent three hours freeing up some idiots who jumped the Joinville dam.

How stupid were they?

That's what we're going to say.

- Where are you running to like that?

- The boat got away, it broke its moorings.

- What's going on? - The Cerf-Volant has vanished!

- The wind must have unmoored it. It may have gone all the way to the sea.

- The wind's carried the boat away.

- Well, with that storm last night.

- I didn't say anything, but I feared the worst.

- Captain! Antoine!

- What's all the fuss?

- The boat's gone. - What?

- What?

- Vanished. - That's impossible.

What about that? That's not possible?

- But in God's name, a boat doesn't just vanish like that.

When we got back I made sure to moor it myself.

Because of the northwest wind I told you to tie a clove hitch.

So, you betrayed me, damn it!

I can still see myself doing a dead turn and two half-hitches.

- Well that's a clove hitch.

All we had to do was load the rum and the corned beef, then set sail in the morning.

The vessel was shipshape, gentlemen.

It's ridiculous, you know.

Victor Ploubaz, conqueror of the five oceans, brought down ten minutes on the train from Paris.

- Here's a little pick-me-up, Captain.

- Come on, an old oak like you doesn't let himself be felled.

- Have a little nerve. - Pull yourself together, M Ploubaz.

- Ah, my poor friends …

What destroys me is to think that we have nailed, hammered, planed,

hurting our hands to get to this point.

Even if we could find the money, I couldn't do it again.

I wouldn't have the energy.

- Don't be upset like that, Captain.

- I'm not upset, I'm living a nightmare.

The boat! The boat!

It was found in the mud, near Melun.

Detection, identification, recovery, delivery.

Signed, Volabruque!

- Bravo! Bravo!

- Other than the mast, there's not much missing.

- A coat of paint and no one will notice.

- To Port Arthur! To Port Arthur!

- I've always had faith in the Captain, I tell you.

Well, Simonet, you're looking a bit pale.

- With emotion, M Volabruque.

- A glass in hand, already, Captain, we're celebrating the reunion.

What joy! Port Arthur in sight!

- My legs are cut off.

I can't helm any more.

The red flares.

Where are those red flares, for God's sake, Antoine?

Antoine, don't helm any more, we're sinking. Come on, the flares.

Don't go.

Don't go.

Don't go, Uncle! Turtle Island is death!

A party for the crabs!

A party for the crabs!

Force six gales were blowing through the house every night now.

If we wanted to get back to sleep and if we didn't want to drown our Uncle,

someone had to find some sense, and quickly.

- Fire! - The Simonets are on fire!

- Fire!

Fire, you three, come here!

- You're going to destroy the whole neighbourhood! Have you got what you wanted?

- Schoolmaster, you're always around when something happens to piss everyone off !

Damn!

- Antoine, where's Pierrot? - What?

- Where's Pierrot? - I don't know.

- Uncle, you might help.

- I can't watch this, I'd rather go.

- How could this have happened?

- It's sabotage. I'm sure it's sabotage. Give me that!

What the hell are you doing here? The boat's on fire.

- You don't say? - What …?

What are you looking for? - Matches.

- Here they are. There might be a few missing.

Well, old chap, that boat's given us quite a time.

First it unmoors, that's no one's fault.

Then it catches fire, that's no one's fault.

I'm not superstitious, but I'd rather not have to embark on a boat like that.

I'd have surely met the great Zigomar of Mercy.

What's that, the great Zigomar of Mercy?

- Well … it's a two-headed bird with hair on its legs.

When it perches at the top of the mast, it means misfortune is going to befall the boat.

One day, in the Gulf of Mexico,

what do I see on the foremast? The Zigomar.

And five minutes later, the typhoon struck.

- Well, Uncle,

when it comes to the great Zigomar, you could have come up with something better than a typhoon.

- Well, since you want to know everything, I didn't meet the Zigomar in the Gulf of Mexico.

It was on a boat whose name it's better not to mention.

- The ghost ship?

Oh dear, yes.

That was a night I'll never forget.

The fog turned red.

I heard the wail of the dead rising, then all of a sudden,

right in front of me, I saw the Flying Dutchman.

When it disappeared, I couldn't remember a thing.

Hey, Pierrot? An idea's just occurred to me.

Instead of going to Grandma's this summer, what would you think of going to Le Tréport?

Le Tréport or Le Crotoy. - Yes, and you could go pedal boating.

You love the sea so much, don't you?

Here's my itinerary.

The south-Southwest Atlantic. Cape Horn. Diagonally across the Pacific.

And you don't hoist the Grand Pavois before Port Arthur. All that without a stopover.

Hey, Victor, instead of watching for the white whale, why don't you sort the haricot beans?

You mustn't think any more about the trip.

In fact, you should stop even looking at the sea.

If we had any sense, you know what we'd do?

We'd find a business in the Massif Central, so you wouldn't see any more boats.

Maybe that would cure you.

Sometimes, I think it would be better if you drank rather than dreamed.

Not that it would hurt you any less, but it would stop you hurting others so much.

Victor, you might answer when I'm talking to you. To travel is very useful, it makes the imagination work (L.F.Céline)

Instead of pretending not to be here, go and draw some cider from the cellar. To travel is very useful, it makes the imagination work (L.F.Céline)

And bring up some coffee, rusks, chicory, prunes … To travel is very useful, it makes the imagination work (L.F.Céline)

English subtitles by jeremys and Marseille

TNT 2024