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1
00:00:20,646 --> 00:00:22,648
ANNOUNCER:
With the stars...
2
00:00:28,028 --> 00:00:30,113
and...
3
00:00:44,086 --> 00:00:47,088
Ralph, if you sink this one,
you tie the house record--
4
00:00:47,089 --> 00:00:48,965
17 balls in a row.
5
00:00:48,966 --> 00:00:50,800
Well, as the bride said
to the groom
6
00:00:50,801 --> 00:00:53,135
when they took the burnt steak
out of the oven,
7
00:00:53,136 --> 00:00:54,971
it's as good as done.
8
00:00:54,972 --> 00:00:56,806
Well, here it goes, for the run.
9
00:00:56,807 --> 00:00:58,475
Yup. Seventeen.
10
00:01:00,435 --> 00:01:01,811
You did it, Kramden.
11
00:01:01,812 --> 00:01:04,397
You tied the house record,
17 in a row.
12
00:01:04,398 --> 00:01:06,482
And now I'm going
to hit in the 18th ball
13
00:01:06,483 --> 00:01:07,984
and break the house record.
14
00:01:07,985 --> 00:01:09,860
Yeah. You know something?
15
00:01:09,861 --> 00:01:12,071
There's something I can't
figure out about your game.
16
00:01:12,072 --> 00:01:14,490
Any time you come in here
on a Saturday afternoon,
17
00:01:14,491 --> 00:01:15,950
you shoot like a champ.
18
00:01:15,951 --> 00:01:17,785
But when you play at night,
19
00:01:17,786 --> 00:01:20,037
you're a sucker for every guy
that comes into the place.
20
00:01:20,038 --> 00:01:22,039
What have you got
on Saturday afternoon
21
00:01:22,040 --> 00:01:23,874
that you haven't got at night?
22
00:01:23,875 --> 00:01:25,960
It isn't what I haven't got
on Saturday afternoon.
23
00:01:25,961 --> 00:01:28,379
It's what I have got: Norton.
24
00:01:28,380 --> 00:01:30,256
That guy'll drive you nuts.
25
00:01:30,257 --> 00:01:32,508
Now, don't rush it, Ralph.
26
00:01:32,509 --> 00:01:34,885
- Don't worry, pal.
-This is the one that counts.
27
00:01:34,886 --> 00:01:36,972
It's going to go in
like it had eyes.
28
00:01:50,485 --> 00:01:53,154
Say there, Ralphie boy in there.
29
00:01:53,155 --> 00:01:55,823
I have just knocked in
17 balls, Norton,
30
00:01:55,824 --> 00:01:57,533
to tie the house record.
31
00:01:57,534 --> 00:01:59,702
I am now going
to knock the 18th ball in
32
00:01:59,703 --> 00:02:01,329
to break the house record,
33
00:02:01,330 --> 00:02:04,166
and I don't want to hear
one sound out of you.
34
00:02:06,209 --> 00:02:08,629
You won't even know I'm here.
35
00:02:16,887 --> 00:02:18,304
I'll be right with you.
36
00:02:18,305 --> 00:02:20,724
I'll show you
how to play the game.
37
00:02:24,061 --> 00:02:25,519
Just let him come out.
38
00:02:25,520 --> 00:02:27,104
Just let him out, Harry!
39
00:02:27,105 --> 00:02:29,774
Please, take it easy, Kramden.
Take it easy.
40
00:02:29,775 --> 00:02:31,442
That guy's enough
to drive you nuts.
41
00:02:31,443 --> 00:02:33,194
He hasn't got
any consideration for anybody.
42
00:02:33,195 --> 00:02:35,404
I'm telling you,
if he wasn't my best friend,
43
00:02:35,405 --> 00:02:37,198
I'd have nothing to do with him.
44
00:02:37,199 --> 00:02:39,075
Look... Look, Ralph,
45
00:02:39,076 --> 00:02:41,369
I've been watching pool players
for a long time.
46
00:02:41,370 --> 00:02:43,287
You're a much better player
than he is.
47
00:02:43,288 --> 00:02:45,039
You know something?
48
00:02:45,040 --> 00:02:48,125
Norton doesn't beat you,
you beat yourself.
49
00:02:48,126 --> 00:02:50,127
Now, look,
pay no attention to him,
50
00:02:50,128 --> 00:02:52,755
and I guarantee
you can beat him.
51
00:02:52,756 --> 00:02:54,799
You know, you're right, Harry.
52
00:02:54,800 --> 00:02:57,468
I don't care what he does,
he's not going to get me upset.
53
00:02:57,469 --> 00:02:59,845
I'll have 50 balls
before he can chalk up.
54
00:02:59,846 --> 00:03:01,764
Now you're talking.
I'll rack 'em up for you.
55
00:03:01,765 --> 00:03:03,974
Go ahead and rack 'em up.
I'm ready for him.
56
00:03:03,975 --> 00:03:07,603
Hey there. (chuckles)
57
00:03:07,604 --> 00:03:09,105
Well, it's just 5:00.
58
00:03:09,106 --> 00:03:12,733
Got time to show you how
to play a game or two.
59
00:03:12,734 --> 00:03:14,193
All right, get your cue.
60
00:03:14,194 --> 00:03:16,070
Sorry I can't offer you
one of these,
61
00:03:16,071 --> 00:03:18,614
but a fellow I work with
down the sewer there, Hagerty,
62
00:03:18,615 --> 00:03:19,949
had a blessed event.
63
00:03:19,950 --> 00:03:22,284
Oh. Had a baby?
64
00:03:22,285 --> 00:03:26,289
No, his mother-in-law moved back
to Schenectady.
65
00:03:28,667 --> 00:03:30,292
Well, what do you do
with the break there?
66
00:03:30,293 --> 00:03:31,627
Toss 'em up in there?
67
00:03:31,628 --> 00:03:33,462
Well, how much
you want to play for?
68
00:03:33,463 --> 00:03:35,965
Well, uh, let's raise
the ante up there.
69
00:03:35,966 --> 00:03:38,050
Let's make it
a nickel a ball there
70
00:03:38,051 --> 00:03:40,469
and a crack over the knuckles
for every scratch.
71
00:03:40,470 --> 00:03:42,638
If you don't mind,
we'll stick to the same odds
72
00:03:42,639 --> 00:03:44,473
we always play.
That's a penny a ball.
73
00:03:44,474 --> 00:03:47,017
Okay. Heads or tails?
74
00:03:47,018 --> 00:03:48,644
Heads.
75
00:03:48,645 --> 00:03:51,313
Tails. I... break.
76
00:03:51,314 --> 00:03:53,315
Wait a minute!
77
00:03:53,316 --> 00:03:55,985
Don't you think
I should see that coin?
78
00:03:55,986 --> 00:03:57,653
Yeah, sure.
79
00:03:57,654 --> 00:03:59,363
Look at it. Look.
80
00:03:59,364 --> 00:04:02,159
Go ahead and break.
81
00:04:20,260 --> 00:04:22,428
Wait a minute.
82
00:04:22,429 --> 00:04:25,264
- What's the idea
of all that powder? -Huh?
83
00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:27,349
I said, what's the idea
of all the powder?
84
00:04:27,350 --> 00:04:29,059
Well, it makes the skin smooth,
85
00:04:29,060 --> 00:04:30,603
the cue don't stick
to your skin there, you know.
86
00:04:30,604 --> 00:04:32,438
Yeah, I learned it
from the pros.
87
00:04:32,439 --> 00:04:35,524
It flies easier there. Yeah.
88
00:04:35,525 --> 00:04:37,277
All right!
89
00:04:50,624 --> 00:04:52,959
Come on!
90
00:04:59,007 --> 00:05:01,467
Just don't shout when I'm about
to break the ball, that's all.
91
00:05:01,468 --> 00:05:03,887
Go ahead and shoot!
92
00:05:13,730 --> 00:05:15,398
Hey!
93
00:05:18,735 --> 00:05:20,904
That's the way I played it.
94
00:05:22,572 --> 00:05:24,406
Not a bad break.
95
00:05:24,407 --> 00:05:26,408
Well, like I say,
with plenty of talcum powder,
96
00:05:26,409 --> 00:05:28,078
the cue don't stick
to your skin there.
97
00:05:47,097 --> 00:05:49,474
You and your talcum powder!
98
00:05:51,059 --> 00:05:53,435
Wait a minute.
What do you think you're doing?
99
00:05:53,436 --> 00:05:55,855
You had your shot.
Now it's my turn.
100
00:05:55,856 --> 00:05:58,941
Move away from that table
before you're not able to move.
101
00:05:58,942 --> 00:06:00,944
Boy, what a grouch.
102
00:06:02,445 --> 00:06:04,906
Three ball. Look out.
103
00:06:10,954 --> 00:06:13,747
Will you stop blowing smoke
in my face?
104
00:06:13,748 --> 00:06:15,750
Put the cigar down.
105
00:06:24,426 --> 00:06:27,094
(screams):
Ow!
106
00:06:27,095 --> 00:06:30,264
What's the matter with you?!
107
00:06:30,265 --> 00:06:31,932
Look what you did to my hand!
108
00:06:31,933 --> 00:06:34,394
Look what you did
to my cigar!
109
00:06:35,604 --> 00:06:37,438
That settles it.
110
00:06:37,439 --> 00:06:39,064
I'm quitting, I'm going home,
111
00:06:39,065 --> 00:06:41,108
-and I never want
to see you again. -All right.
112
00:06:41,109 --> 00:06:42,484
You are the only man
113
00:06:42,485 --> 00:06:44,194
that can turn my stomach
upside down.
114
00:06:44,195 --> 00:06:46,280
Go ahead. There ain't a man
in New York City
115
00:06:46,281 --> 00:06:49,618
that's strong enough to turn
your stomach upside down!
116
00:06:55,624 --> 00:06:57,458
(alarm bell ringing)
117
00:06:57,459 --> 00:06:59,460
(gunshots, whistle blowing)
118
00:06:59,461 --> 00:07:00,794
(engine accelerating)
119
00:07:00,795 --> 00:07:03,714
- What was that?!
-I heard a shot!
120
00:07:03,715 --> 00:07:05,215
- Hey, what's it all about?
-I don't know.
121
00:07:05,216 --> 00:07:06,634
It sounded like
a burglar alarm or something.
122
00:07:06,635 --> 00:07:08,052
- A burglar alarm?
-Yeah.
123
00:07:08,053 --> 00:07:09,470
I'll be back in a minute.
124
00:07:09,471 --> 00:07:11,890
Watch the place,
will you, Norton?
125
00:07:18,563 --> 00:07:21,023
Hey, Ralph,
were you out there when...?
126
00:07:21,024 --> 00:07:23,400
- What happened to you?
-(Ralph stammers)
127
00:07:23,401 --> 00:07:25,069
What do you mean, "ba-ba?"
128
00:07:25,070 --> 00:07:27,489
What happened?
129
00:07:29,574 --> 00:07:32,242
(Ralph mutters)
130
00:07:32,243 --> 00:07:34,495
Right through the hat.
131
00:07:34,496 --> 00:07:36,497
- Right through the hat!
-Hey, Ralph.
132
00:07:36,498 --> 00:07:37,998
- I... -I'm standing
on the corner, I'm waiting
133
00:07:37,999 --> 00:07:39,750
-for a red light to change.
-Yeah.
134
00:07:39,751 --> 00:07:41,919
All of a sudden, two guys
come running out of the bank,
135
00:07:41,920 --> 00:07:43,587
they see me,
and they take a shot at me.
136
00:07:43,588 --> 00:07:46,340
My hat flies off.
Right through the hat, Norton.
137
00:07:46,341 --> 00:07:50,260
Ralphie boy,
that could have killed you!
138
00:07:50,261 --> 00:07:51,845
Did you see the guys?
139
00:07:51,846 --> 00:07:53,305
I got a little glimpse of them.
140
00:07:53,306 --> 00:07:54,932
Yeah, I know
what they look like all right.
141
00:07:54,933 --> 00:07:56,600
Well, why don't you tell
the cops?
142
00:07:56,601 --> 00:07:59,270
You're right. I got
to tell the cops right away.
143
00:08:01,272 --> 00:08:02,856
- Wait a minute.
-What?
144
00:08:02,857 --> 00:08:04,608
- I can't tell the cops.
-Why not?
145
00:08:04,609 --> 00:08:07,277
If I tell the cops, my picture
will appear in the paper,
146
00:08:07,278 --> 00:08:08,904
with my address and everything.
147
00:08:08,905 --> 00:08:10,531
Oh, hey, hey, that's right.
That's right.
148
00:08:10,532 --> 00:08:11,949
They're killers, Norton.
149
00:08:11,950 --> 00:08:13,492
-(Norton stammers)
-They'll do me in.
150
00:08:13,493 --> 00:08:14,868
Don't tell the cops nothing,
because
151
00:08:14,869 --> 00:08:16,328
if the cops didn't know
you were there,
152
00:08:16,329 --> 00:08:17,746
then the killers
don't know you were there,
153
00:08:17,747 --> 00:08:19,415
and nobody saw you,
and nothing happens.
154
00:08:19,416 --> 00:08:20,916
I'm not saying a word.
155
00:08:20,917 --> 00:08:23,920
- I didn't see anybody.
-That's good.
156
00:08:26,131 --> 00:08:27,756
I know they're going
to get me, Norton.
157
00:08:27,757 --> 00:08:29,925
I'm a-scared.
I'm a-scared!
158
00:08:29,926 --> 00:08:32,636
Just calm down. Relax.
Look, it's getting dark out.
159
00:08:32,637 --> 00:08:34,930
It's 5:00, 5:30, you know,
nobody's seen you.
160
00:08:34,931 --> 00:08:37,391
All they seen
is the dark outline, you know?
161
00:08:37,392 --> 00:08:39,601
Maybe
there's a thousand people there
162
00:08:39,602 --> 00:08:41,603
built like you
in New York City.
163
00:08:41,604 --> 00:08:43,440
You really think so?
164
00:08:44,941 --> 00:08:47,484
Maybe a hundred, a...
165
00:08:47,485 --> 00:08:51,113
A couple, anyway-
166
00:08:51,114 --> 00:08:52,906
- Boy, oh, boy, what excitement!
-What?
167
00:08:52,907 --> 00:08:54,450
The guys knocked off
the watchman
168
00:08:54,451 --> 00:08:56,201
and made a clean getaway.
169
00:08:56,202 --> 00:08:58,579
- And the cops can't find
an eyewitness. -No kidding?
170
00:08:58,580 --> 00:09:01,498
Hey, Ralph, weren't you outside
when it happened?
171
00:09:01,499 --> 00:09:03,375
(Ralph stammers)
172
00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:05,961
You know, if you saw anything,
you better tell the police.
173
00:09:05,962 --> 00:09:07,838
L-I didn't see anything.
What did I see?
174
00:09:07,839 --> 00:09:09,256
Oh, no,
you haven't seen a thing.
175
00:09:09,257 --> 00:09:11,383
Look, uh, uh, just relax.
176
00:09:11,384 --> 00:09:14,219
Uh, you come home
with me, you know,
177
00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:16,013
you haven't seen nothing,
and, uh, uh,
178
00:09:16,014 --> 00:09:18,057
Trixie is spending the night
with her sister there,
179
00:09:18,058 --> 00:09:19,975
you come home with me,
we have some supper,
180
00:09:19,976 --> 00:09:21,560
we play a couple
of games of pinochle,
181
00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:23,896
and, uh, then we look
at a very good movie
182
00:09:23,897 --> 00:09:25,481
on the late, late show.
183
00:09:25,482 --> 00:09:27,483
Maybe you're right, Norton.
184
00:09:27,484 --> 00:09:29,068
Maybe that'll calm me down.
185
00:09:29,069 --> 00:09:31,236
What's playing tonight
on the late, late show?
186
00:09:31,237 --> 00:09:35,950
Uh, Humphrey Bogart
in Dead Men Tell No Tales.
187
00:09:56,638 --> 00:09:58,847
(knocking on door)
188
00:09:58,848 --> 00:10:01,267
Coming!
189
00:10:05,605 --> 00:10:07,147
Hiya, Tommy.
190
00:10:07,148 --> 00:10:08,982
Hello, Mrs. Kramden.
191
00:10:08,983 --> 00:10:10,651
My mother sent me down here
to find out
192
00:10:10,652 --> 00:10:12,444
if there was any water
running in your sink.
193
00:10:12,445 --> 00:10:13,862
Ours is busted.
194
00:10:13,863 --> 00:10:16,907
Well, I'll see.
195
00:10:16,908 --> 00:10:18,909
(hissing, loud popping)
196
00:10:18,910 --> 00:10:20,410
Ch!
197
00:10:20,411 --> 00:10:21,745
Sounds like a cannon.
198
00:10:21,746 --> 00:10:23,247
Just like ours.
199
00:10:23,248 --> 00:10:24,665
Tommy, would you do me a favour?
200
00:10:24,666 --> 00:10:26,834
See if you can turn
that valve under there.
201
00:10:26,835 --> 00:10:28,085
That might do something.
202
00:10:28,086 --> 00:10:30,505
Sure.
203
00:10:32,090 --> 00:10:33,924
Attaboy.
204
00:10:33,925 --> 00:10:36,760
Try it now, Mrs. Kramden.
205
00:10:36,761 --> 00:10:39,680
(hissing, loud popping)
206
00:10:39,681 --> 00:10:41,431
(Alice groans)
207
00:10:41,432 --> 00:10:43,892
Same old story-- plenty
of pressure, but no water.
208
00:10:43,893 --> 00:10:45,769
I guess you better
tell your mother
209
00:10:45,770 --> 00:10:47,896
that it's the same thing
all over the house.
210
00:10:47,897 --> 00:10:50,941
What a break! That means I won't
have to take a bath tonight.
211
00:10:50,942 --> 00:10:54,069
- Oh.
-Oh, hiya, Tommy.
212
00:10:54,070 --> 00:10:56,948
- Hi, Alice.
-Hi.
213
00:11:01,119 --> 00:11:03,537
- Boy, I sure am glad
you stopped in, Trix. -Huh?
214
00:11:03,538 --> 00:11:05,789
Our sink's on the blink again.
215
00:11:05,790 --> 00:11:07,583
Oh, I know.
I left a note for Ed,
216
00:11:07,584 --> 00:11:10,043
and I put it
where he'd be sure to find it.
217
00:11:10,044 --> 00:11:12,379
- In the icebox?
-Yeah.
218
00:11:12,380 --> 00:11:14,715
I just hope he's able
to fix it, though.
219
00:11:14,716 --> 00:11:16,049
Boy, me, too.
I'm telling you,
220
00:11:16,050 --> 00:11:18,051
this house is just
falling apart.
221
00:11:18,052 --> 00:11:20,888
Why not? It's so old, I'll bet
George Washington slept here.
222
00:11:20,889 --> 00:11:22,556
He couldn't have.
223
00:11:22,557 --> 00:11:23,891
This place was condemned
224
00:11:23,892 --> 00:11:26,393
before George Washington
got here.
225
00:11:26,394 --> 00:11:28,896
I got to be going, Alice.
226
00:11:28,897 --> 00:11:30,898
Hey, Alice,
what's this doing here?
227
00:11:30,899 --> 00:11:33,317
- Oh, that's Tommy Manicotti's
water pistol. -Oh.
228
00:11:33,318 --> 00:11:34,693
- He just left it here.
-Oh.
229
00:11:34,694 --> 00:11:36,403
I guess he'll pick it up later.
230
00:11:36,404 --> 00:11:38,488
Yeah. Listen, Alice, I'll be
down to see you tomorrow
231
00:11:38,489 --> 00:11:40,407
-just as soon as I get back.
-All right, Trix. -Okay.
232
00:11:40,408 --> 00:11:42,409
- Say hello to your sister
for me. -I sure will.
233
00:11:42,410 --> 00:11:44,787
'BYE. honey,
'BYE-bye .
234
00:11:49,250 --> 00:11:51,669
(tapping lightly at window)
235
00:11:54,756 --> 00:11:58,008
I just want to let you know
in case you see me out here.
236
00:11:58,009 --> 00:12:00,093
I'm putting up a television
aerial for Mrs. Halperin.
237
00:12:00,094 --> 00:12:02,763
Oh, thanks. You're working
kind of late, aren't you?
238
00:12:02,764 --> 00:12:04,097
Ah, you know
how some people are.
239
00:12:04,098 --> 00:12:05,557
She's got to have
the set tonight.
240
00:12:05,558 --> 00:12:07,894
Yeah, I know.
241
00:12:28,539 --> 00:12:29,790
Oh, Ralph!
242
00:12:29,791 --> 00:12:32,335
(Ralph screams)
243
00:12:34,921 --> 00:12:37,256
What's the matter
with you, Ralph?
244
00:12:37,257 --> 00:12:40,092
Nothing, you just
surprised me, that's all.
245
00:12:40,093 --> 00:12:42,094
Oh. Well, I just want to tell
you I'll have your supper ready
246
00:12:42,095 --> 00:12:43,512
for you in a minute,
but I'm just finishing
247
00:12:43,513 --> 00:12:44,763
a hem on a dress in here.
248
00:12:44,764 --> 00:12:47,141
- Yeah.
-I'll be right out.
249
00:12:55,108 --> 00:12:56,942
How are you?
250
00:12:56,943 --> 00:13:00,112
(yells)
251
00:13:00,113 --> 00:13:01,822
I'm sorry I scared you, mister.
252
00:13:01,823 --> 00:13:04,033
I'm just putting up
a television aerial.
253
00:13:14,919 --> 00:13:16,378
(hissing, loud popping)
254
00:13:16,379 --> 00:13:18,798
(cries out in pain)
255
00:13:22,719 --> 00:13:26,221
(groaning)
256
00:13:26,222 --> 00:13:28,557
They got me, Alice!
257
00:13:28,558 --> 00:13:30,058
They got me! They got me, Alice!
258
00:13:30,059 --> 00:13:32,060
Ralph, what's the matter?
259
00:13:32,061 --> 00:13:33,562
They got me, Alice!
260
00:13:33,563 --> 00:13:35,897
Ralph, Ralph, nobody got you.
261
00:13:35,898 --> 00:13:39,068
It's the sink, Ralph.
I forgot to tell you about it.
262
00:13:41,738 --> 00:13:44,072
- Sink?
-Yeah. The noise that it makes.
263
00:13:44,073 --> 00:13:45,907
I hope it didn't scare you.
264
00:13:45,908 --> 00:13:48,910
What are you talking about?
Why would I get scared?
265
00:13:48,911 --> 00:13:51,330
We're going to really have to do
something about this, Ralph.
266
00:13:51,331 --> 00:13:52,748
Now will you help me
slice the bread, please?
267
00:13:52,749 --> 00:13:54,207
I got to set the table.
268
00:13:54,208 --> 00:13:56,377
Oh, the big knife is
in the bureau drawer.
269
00:14:00,757 --> 00:14:03,925
Hey... what is this thing doing
in there?
270
00:14:03,926 --> 00:14:05,719
Oh, that's little
Tommy's water pistol.
271
00:14:05,720 --> 00:14:07,429
He was up here a while ago
and left it here.
272
00:14:07,430 --> 00:14:09,556
You want to take it down
to him after supper for me?
273
00:14:09,557 --> 00:14:10,975
All right.
274
00:14:25,073 --> 00:14:27,240
All right, Ralph.
275
00:14:27,241 --> 00:14:29,743
- Tell me.
-Tell you what?
276
00:14:29,744 --> 00:14:31,078
Ever since
you came home tonight,
277
00:14:31,079 --> 00:14:32,579
I knew you were upset
about something.
278
00:14:32,580 --> 00:14:34,581
Now look how
your hand is shaking.
279
00:14:34,582 --> 00:14:36,083
Who's shaking?
280
00:14:36,084 --> 00:14:37,918
Well, all right,
then, cut the bread.
281
00:14:37,919 --> 00:14:40,087
I'll cut it.
282
00:14:40,088 --> 00:14:43,423
There's no sense in me lying to
you, Alice. I got to tell you.
283
00:14:43,424 --> 00:14:46,259
Now, look, when I tell you,
I don't want you to get nervous,
284
00:14:46,260 --> 00:14:49,096
'cause there's nothing
to get nervous about.
285
00:14:49,097 --> 00:14:50,972
There's a couple of guys
out after me.
286
00:14:50,973 --> 00:14:52,766
- They're going to kill me.
-What?!
287
00:14:52,767 --> 00:14:54,559
I was coming out
of the poolroom,
288
00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:56,978
I was on my way home,
and I stopped for a red light.
289
00:14:56,979 --> 00:14:59,022
And two guys come running
out of the bank,
290
00:14:59,023 --> 00:15:00,607
and they saw me,
and I saw them,
291
00:15:00,608 --> 00:15:02,234
and they took a shot at me
and the hat flew off,
292
00:15:02,235 --> 00:15:03,652
and I got a hole in my hat.
293
00:15:03,653 --> 00:15:05,028
Oh, Ralph, this is terrible!
294
00:15:05,029 --> 00:15:07,030
- Why didn't you tell me before?
- Well. ..
295
00:15:07,031 --> 00:15:08,949
What did the police say?
296
00:15:08,950 --> 00:15:10,492
I didn't tell the police.
297
00:15:10,493 --> 00:15:12,160
You didn't tell them?
298
00:15:12,161 --> 00:15:14,329
I can't tell the police, Alice.
299
00:15:14,330 --> 00:15:16,289
If I tell the police,
my picture will be in the paper
300
00:15:16,290 --> 00:15:17,707
with my address
and everything else.
301
00:15:17,708 --> 00:15:19,084
Those guys will know
right where we are.
302
00:15:19,085 --> 00:15:20,794
They'll come up here
and get me.
303
00:15:20,795 --> 00:15:22,504
They're killers, Alice.
It's better off this way.
304
00:15:22,505 --> 00:15:23,922
Nobody knows that I saw them,
and it's all right.
305
00:15:23,923 --> 00:15:25,465
What do you mean,
"better this way?"
306
00:15:25,466 --> 00:15:26,883
Why, you're shaking
so you can't even
307
00:15:26,884 --> 00:15:28,260
cut a slice of bread, Ralph.
308
00:15:28,261 --> 00:15:29,678
And you jump
at the slightest noise.
309
00:15:29,679 --> 00:15:31,179
I'll be all right tomorrow.
310
00:15:31,180 --> 00:15:32,639
I'll calm down,
and everything will be fine.
311
00:15:32,640 --> 00:15:34,266
Ralph, you've got
to go to the police,
312
00:15:34,267 --> 00:15:35,892
or it'll just get worse.
Don't you understand?
313
00:15:35,893 --> 00:15:37,310
You won't be able
to walk down a dark street,
314
00:15:37,311 --> 00:15:38,728
you'll be afraid
of every shadow.
315
00:15:38,729 --> 00:15:40,564
And if a car backfires,
316
00:15:40,565 --> 00:15:42,357
you'll think somebody
took a shot at you.
317
00:15:42,358 --> 00:15:44,025
Why, it'll get so
you get on the bus,
318
00:15:44,026 --> 00:15:45,444
you'll think
every passenger that's on there
319
00:15:45,445 --> 00:15:47,237
is going to try and kill you.
320
00:15:47,238 --> 00:15:49,574
You can't live the rest
of your life in fear, Ralph.
321
00:15:50,825 --> 00:15:52,742
You're right.
322
00:15:52,743 --> 00:15:54,411
I'll go down
to the police now.
323
00:15:54,412 --> 00:15:56,163
I knew you would, Ralph,
and I'll go with you.
324
00:15:56,164 --> 00:15:58,165
Oh, wait a minute. You're not
going anywhere with me.
325
00:15:58,166 --> 00:15:59,791
I don't want you
to get mixed up in this.
326
00:15:59,792 --> 00:16:01,418
- Oh, but Ralph.
-This is my responsibility.
327
00:16:01,419 --> 00:16:03,086
Don't "But Ralph" me now.
328
00:16:03,087 --> 00:16:04,921
Sweetheart, I don't want
anything in the world
329
00:16:04,922 --> 00:16:06,506
to happen to you.
I'm in love with you.
330
00:16:06,507 --> 00:16:08,300
Now let me
take this thing alone.
331
00:16:08,301 --> 00:16:09,718
Ralph, anything
that's going to happen to you
332
00:16:09,719 --> 00:16:11,136
is going to happen to me, too.
333
00:16:11,137 --> 00:16:12,596
Now I'm going to go
and get my coat.
334
00:16:12,597 --> 00:16:15,016
Now, look...
335
00:16:23,733 --> 00:16:26,068
MAN:
That's him. That's the guy.
336
00:16:29,155 --> 00:16:30,572
(pounding on door,
Ralph stammers)
337
00:16:30,573 --> 00:16:33,367
ALICE:
Ralph! Ralph, open this door!
338
00:16:34,702 --> 00:16:36,203
Stay in there, Alice!
339
00:16:36,204 --> 00:16:38,246
Don't come out.
Don't get in this.
340
00:16:38,247 --> 00:16:39,664
Come on, Danny,
let's grab him and blow, huh?
341
00:16:39,665 --> 00:16:41,416
Are you crazy?
A minute after we left,
342
00:16:41,417 --> 00:16:43,710
the dame would spread the alarm.
Come on, get out of the way.
343
00:16:43,711 --> 00:16:45,504
Oh, wait a minute, now, pal.
344
00:16:45,505 --> 00:16:46,838
Now, wait a second. She doesn't
know anything about the...
345
00:16:46,839 --> 00:16:48,298
You heard me.
Get out of the way!
346
00:16:48,299 --> 00:16:49,716
She doesn't know anything
about this, pal.
347
00:16:49,717 --> 00:16:51,092
Okay, lady, out.
348
00:16:51,093 --> 00:16:52,761
- Look...
-Oh, Ralph!
349
00:16:52,762 --> 00:16:55,055
Look, look, I won't
tell anybody, honest. I-l...
350
00:16:55,056 --> 00:16:56,973
- Shut up!
-I swear I won't tell.
351
00:16:56,974 --> 00:16:59,809
Shut up! Bibbo, you go
and see if it's clear.
352
00:16:59,810 --> 00:17:01,394
Find out
if everything's all set.
353
00:17:01,395 --> 00:17:03,063
(distant sirens wailing)
354
00:17:03,064 --> 00:17:05,607
Now, I don't want a word
out of either of you two.
355
00:17:05,608 --> 00:17:06,983
Hey, you hear something?
356
00:17:06,984 --> 00:17:09,361
(sirens continue,
engine accelerating)
357
00:17:09,362 --> 00:17:11,029
DANNY:
ls that Marty pulling away?
358
00:17:11,030 --> 00:17:12,864
He's pulling away with the car.
359
00:17:12,865 --> 00:17:14,699
Hey, there's something wrong.
360
00:17:14,700 --> 00:17:16,576
- Hey, Danny, it's the cops!
-DANNY: What?
361
00:17:16,577 --> 00:17:19,204
- Cops? -Yeah, a patrol car
just pulled up.
362
00:17:19,205 --> 00:17:22,249
- Did you talk to the cops?
-(stammering): Oh, I...
363
00:17:22,250 --> 00:17:24,668
- The truth! -(Ralph stammers)
-Hey, wait a minute.
364
00:17:24,669 --> 00:17:26,169
- Wait a minute. -RALPH:
I wouldn't say anything.
365
00:17:26,170 --> 00:17:27,504
One of those cops
is coming up this way now.
366
00:17:27,505 --> 00:17:29,047
Hey, look,
we got to blow this joint.
367
00:17:29,048 --> 00:17:30,882
The roof. We can beat it
across the roof, huh?
368
00:17:30,883 --> 00:17:32,551
Now, wait a minute,
wait a minute, Monty.
369
00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:34,219
Just get a hold of yourself.
370
00:17:34,220 --> 00:17:36,096
They found out about this guy
down at the poolroom.
371
00:17:36,097 --> 00:17:37,597
Those cops don't know nothing.
372
00:17:37,598 --> 00:17:39,224
- They're coming here
for information. -Yeah?
373
00:17:39,225 --> 00:17:41,560
And you ain't giving it
to 'em, mister.
374
00:17:41,561 --> 00:17:43,895
If they come in here,
you know nothing.
375
00:17:43,896 --> 00:17:45,564
You don't say one single word,
376
00:17:45,565 --> 00:17:48,692
or else... she gets it.
377
00:17:48,693 --> 00:17:52,237
- Okay, Bibbo, take her inside.
-All right.
378
00:17:52,238 --> 00:17:54,239
- Come on. -(Ralph stammers)
-Now, just remember what I said.
379
00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:56,242
-(knocking on door)
-One word!
380
00:18:06,836 --> 00:18:10,005
- Kramden?
-I don't know anything.
381
00:18:10,006 --> 00:18:12,215
Police Department, Mr. Kramden.
382
00:18:12,216 --> 00:18:13,925
I don't know nothing.
383
00:18:13,926 --> 00:18:16,845
Now, look, you're in a bad spot,
you know that?
384
00:18:16,846 --> 00:18:18,972
I'm going to tell you
just what I told your pal
385
00:18:18,973 --> 00:18:20,557
down at the poolroom.
386
00:18:20,558 --> 00:18:23,184
Your safety and your life
is in danger
387
00:18:23,185 --> 00:18:25,353
if you don't give us
a description.
388
00:18:25,354 --> 00:18:26,688
I didn't see anything.
389
00:18:26,689 --> 00:18:28,023
These fellas are killers.
390
00:18:28,024 --> 00:18:30,025
They shot the night watchman.
391
00:18:30,026 --> 00:18:31,401
I don't know anything. I...
392
00:18:31,402 --> 00:18:33,236
You don't know anything, huh?
393
00:18:33,237 --> 00:18:36,197
All right,
I'm going to give you a break.
394
00:18:36,198 --> 00:18:38,533
I'm leaving
a policeman downstairs
395
00:18:38,534 --> 00:18:40,702
to look after you overnight.
396
00:18:40,703 --> 00:18:43,204
But if you don't tell us
what you know by morning,
397
00:18:43,205 --> 00:18:45,040
you're on your own.
398
00:18:45,041 --> 00:18:46,583
If you're not a witness,
399
00:18:46,584 --> 00:18:48,543
you're not entitled
to police protection.
400
00:18:48,544 --> 00:18:51,212
And thanks... for nothing!
401
00:18:51,213 --> 00:18:53,591
Welcome.
402
00:18:56,927 --> 00:18:58,720
I didn't tell him anything.
403
00:18:58,721 --> 00:19:01,389
- Alice?
-He's gone.
404
00:19:01,390 --> 00:19:03,850
Sure, sure, he's gone,
but what about the other copper
405
00:19:03,851 --> 00:19:06,019
that's waiting downstairs?
What about him, huh?
406
00:19:06,020 --> 00:19:07,520
Nothing.
He'll be gone in the morning.
407
00:19:07,521 --> 00:19:09,022
But we can't stay here
all night!
408
00:19:09,023 --> 00:19:10,607
Why not?
We got the police protecting us.
409
00:19:10,608 --> 00:19:12,609
Please, please, go away.
We won't say anything.
410
00:19:12,610 --> 00:19:14,194
Look, I just proved to you
411
00:19:14,195 --> 00:19:16,029
I wasn't going
to say anything. I... -Shut up!
412
00:19:16,030 --> 00:19:17,656
Look, Danny, Danny, what about
Marty in the car, huh?
413
00:19:17,657 --> 00:19:19,282
Don't worry about Marty.
414
00:19:19,283 --> 00:19:20,950
He was smart enough
to duck when the cops showed.
415
00:19:20,951 --> 00:19:22,452
He'll come back
when they're gone. Don't you...
416
00:19:22,453 --> 00:19:24,204
Look, look, I-l don't like this.
417
00:19:24,205 --> 00:19:26,373
I don't like the idea
of staying here all night.
418
00:19:26,374 --> 00:19:28,708
I didn't ask you
what you liked.
419
00:19:28,709 --> 00:19:30,710
Please, please,
will you go away?
420
00:19:30,711 --> 00:19:33,214
- I want your...
-All right, stick 'em up!
421
00:19:34,715 --> 00:19:36,549
Get 'em up!
422
00:19:36,550 --> 00:19:38,051
(knocking on door)
423
00:19:38,052 --> 00:19:39,386
Who is it?
424
00:19:39,387 --> 00:19:40,887
TOMMY:
It's me, Tommy.
425
00:19:40,888 --> 00:19:43,265
Have you got my water pistol
in there?
426
00:20:05,246 --> 00:20:06,746
Here you are, Tommy.
427
00:20:06,747 --> 00:20:08,248
TOMMY:
Thanks, Mr. Kramden.
428
00:20:08,249 --> 00:20:11,668
You're very welcome.
429
00:20:11,669 --> 00:20:15,547
Hey, look, Danny, let me
give him a working-over, huh?
430
00:20:15,548 --> 00:20:17,841
- No, no! -Another stupid move
like that, Kramden,
431
00:20:17,842 --> 00:20:20,427
you'll get the worst beating
anybody ever got in their life.
432
00:20:20,428 --> 00:20:22,262
Just let me give him
a sample, huh, Danny?
433
00:20:22,263 --> 00:20:23,763
- A little sample, huh?
-Ralph, please.
434
00:20:23,764 --> 00:20:25,223
Tell them that you'll do
anything they say.
435
00:20:25,224 --> 00:20:26,850
Now, look,
you two are sitting down.
436
00:20:26,851 --> 00:20:28,935
You're not making a sound
or a move from here in.
437
00:20:28,936 --> 00:20:31,438
If you try anything,
I ain't stopping Bibbo.
438
00:20:31,439 --> 00:20:33,106
Now sit!
439
00:20:33,107 --> 00:20:34,441
(knocking on door)
440
00:20:34,442 --> 00:20:36,025
Answer that.
441
00:20:36,026 --> 00:20:38,111
- Who is it? -NORTON: Uh,
it's me, Ralph, Norton.
442
00:20:38,112 --> 00:20:40,613
What you got
the door locked for?
443
00:20:40,614 --> 00:20:42,449
It's my friend from upstairs.
444
00:20:42,450 --> 00:20:44,993
You get rid of him
the same way you did the copper.
445
00:20:44,994 --> 00:20:47,787
Inside. Go ahead, Bibbo.
446
00:20:47,788 --> 00:20:49,957
Coming, Norton.
447
00:20:52,460 --> 00:20:55,003
Hey there, Ralphie boy.
448
00:20:55,004 --> 00:20:57,172
My, you got the door locked,
you're pale, and you're shaking.
449
00:20:57,173 --> 00:20:59,382
Those bums are
a thousand miles away from here.
450
00:20:59,383 --> 00:21:00,925
Uh, why don't you go home now?
451
00:21:00,926 --> 00:21:02,343
What do you mean,
"Why don't I go home?"
452
00:21:02,344 --> 00:21:03,845
Those guys ain't got
any courage.
453
00:21:03,846 --> 00:21:05,221
They're not going
to stick around here.
454
00:21:05,222 --> 00:21:06,473
They'll run like rats.
455
00:21:06,474 --> 00:21:08,224
- Go ahead out now.
-Huh?
456
00:21:08,225 --> 00:21:11,394
I say, get out.
457
00:21:11,395 --> 00:21:13,730
What's the matter, Ralph,
you got a twitch?
458
00:21:13,731 --> 00:21:15,648
Just get out.
459
00:21:15,649 --> 00:21:19,652
You act like a guy
that's got a gun in his back.
460
00:21:19,653 --> 00:21:21,738
Will you get out of here?!
461
00:21:21,739 --> 00:21:24,657
Look, I come down here
in good faith to fix the pipes,
462
00:21:24,658 --> 00:21:26,743
and that's just
what I'm going to do.
463
00:21:26,744 --> 00:21:28,828
Uh, we don't want
any pipes fixed now.
464
00:21:28,829 --> 00:21:31,456
You can come on down tomorrow
and fix all the pipes.
465
00:21:31,457 --> 00:21:32,916
- All?
-All the pipes.
466
00:21:32,917 --> 00:21:35,126
The pipes out here
and the two pipes
467
00:21:35,127 --> 00:21:36,836
that need fixing
inside the bedroom.
468
00:21:36,837 --> 00:21:38,588
I'll take a look-see.
469
00:21:38,589 --> 00:21:41,549
You can't go in there now.
Alice is in there.
470
00:21:41,550 --> 00:21:43,301
She's getting dressed.
471
00:21:43,302 --> 00:21:46,137
Uh, you can come down and fix
those two pipes tomorrow.
472
00:21:46,138 --> 00:21:47,931
Oh...
(chuckles)
473
00:21:47,932 --> 00:21:50,809
Well, okay, like you say,
if there's a better time,
474
00:21:50,810 --> 00:21:52,435
I'll come down
and fix the pipes tomorrow.
475
00:21:52,436 --> 00:21:55,104
- Bye. Bye. So long, Norton.
-Bye, Ralph.
476
00:21:55,105 --> 00:21:56,941
- Okay, pal.
-Okay.
477
00:21:58,609 --> 00:22:00,360
Hey, uh, I got rid of him.
478
00:22:00,361 --> 00:22:01,778
Okay, now lock the door.
479
00:22:01,779 --> 00:22:03,196
Yes, sir. Yes, sir.
480
00:22:03,197 --> 00:22:04,572
- Hey.
-Oh.
481
00:22:04,573 --> 00:22:06,199
I was just thinking.
482
00:22:06,200 --> 00:22:08,993
There's only one pipe there
that needs fixing.
483
00:22:08,994 --> 00:22:11,372
(laughing)
484
00:22:23,384 --> 00:22:25,218
You're making
a big mistake, you know.
485
00:22:25,219 --> 00:22:26,845
What are you going
to do, untie us
486
00:22:26,846 --> 00:22:28,721
every time somebody
knocks at the door?
487
00:22:28,722 --> 00:22:30,723
Now, listen, redhead,
don't strain your brain.
488
00:22:30,724 --> 00:22:33,059
- It's after 11:00.
Visiting hours are over. -Ow!
489
00:22:33,060 --> 00:22:36,062
Hey, you, take it easy.
That's my wife.
490
00:22:36,063 --> 00:22:38,565
What are you going
to do about it, fatso, huh?
491
00:22:38,566 --> 00:22:42,443
Now, look, pudgy,
put your hands behind your back.
492
00:22:42,444 --> 00:22:44,237
I'm not going to do it.
493
00:22:44,238 --> 00:22:46,406
I said, put your hands
behind your back!
494
00:22:46,407 --> 00:22:49,742
I don't care what you said,
I'm not going to do it. Look...
495
00:22:49,743 --> 00:22:52,579
- Look, pal...
-You look. And you look.
496
00:22:52,580 --> 00:22:54,581
Go ahead and wave that gun.
497
00:22:54,582 --> 00:22:56,416
I must have been a dope.
498
00:22:56,417 --> 00:22:59,085
You guys are in
just as much trouble as we are.
499
00:22:59,086 --> 00:23:01,546
We can't leave here,
and neither can you.
500
00:23:01,547 --> 00:23:03,923
Those cops are downstairs,
you know.
501
00:23:03,924 --> 00:23:06,342
And if you shoot that gun off,
you know what'll happen?
502
00:23:06,343 --> 00:23:07,886
Every cop in the neighborhood
503
00:23:07,887 --> 00:23:10,930
will be up here in five seconds.
So just go ahead.
504
00:23:10,931 --> 00:23:13,725
And look, I don't know when
I'm going to run into you,
505
00:23:13,726 --> 00:23:15,310
but some day
I'm going to run into you
506
00:23:15,311 --> 00:23:17,228
when you haven't got
this guy with the gun.
507
00:23:17,229 --> 00:23:19,772
And brother,
are you going to get yours.
508
00:23:19,773 --> 00:23:21,482
Look, by the time
we get finished with you,
509
00:23:21,483 --> 00:23:23,276
-you won't be in no condition
to get ours. -Yeah?
510
00:23:23,277 --> 00:23:25,403
Okay, Bibbo, take him inside and
work him over. Come on.
511
00:23:25,404 --> 00:23:27,155
- Over there. -No, no, please!
He didn't mean it!
512
00:23:27,156 --> 00:23:28,573
- Get in there. -He didn't
mean it! Just tie him up!
513
00:23:28,574 --> 00:23:30,074
Get in there!
514
00:23:30,075 --> 00:23:31,868
Don't take him in there!
515
00:23:31,869 --> 00:23:33,328
You ain't married
516
00:23:33,329 --> 00:23:34,996
-to a very smart guy, lady.
-(thudding)
517
00:23:34,997 --> 00:23:36,789
He sure asked for it.
518
00:23:36,790 --> 00:23:39,918
(flying):
Stop it! Stop it!
519
00:23:39,919 --> 00:23:42,879
They're killing him!
520
00:23:42,880 --> 00:23:45,214
- ALICE: Stop it! -If you want
to be next, I can arrange it.
521
00:23:45,215 --> 00:23:46,634
- Yeah?
-DANNY: Yeah.
522
00:23:51,972 --> 00:23:53,765
All right, you! Get 'em up!
523
00:23:53,766 --> 00:23:55,266
ALICE:
Ralph!
524
00:23:55,267 --> 00:23:58,603
Get 'em up. Go over there
and untie them.
525
00:23:58,604 --> 00:24:01,105
Ralph. Ralph.
526
00:24:01,106 --> 00:24:03,608
L-I... I thought it was you
that was getting killed.
527
00:24:03,609 --> 00:24:05,026
Just get over there.
528
00:24:05,027 --> 00:24:07,028
Wait a minute, here.
Just a minute.
529
00:24:07,029 --> 00:24:09,448
Look out.
530
00:24:12,034 --> 00:24:14,327
Nobody's killing me.
531
00:24:14,328 --> 00:24:15,870
Watch out for the other one.
532
00:24:15,871 --> 00:24:17,872
I got him covered. Get up.
533
00:24:17,873 --> 00:24:20,041
That'll be the day
when a burn like you
534
00:24:20,042 --> 00:24:22,085
can take care of me.
535
00:24:22,086 --> 00:24:23,544
I suppose this is the first time
536
00:24:23,545 --> 00:24:26,799
you ever run into a bus driver,
isn't it?
537
00:24:28,884 --> 00:24:32,220
All right. I'm going to take
you guys downstairs.
538
00:24:32,221 --> 00:24:34,180
No, no, no, no, Ralph,
you done enough already.
539
00:24:34,181 --> 00:24:35,723
Let me take them down there,
will ya?
540
00:24:35,724 --> 00:24:38,226
All right, be my guest.
541
00:24:38,227 --> 00:24:40,061
All right, you crummy thugs.
542
00:24:40,062 --> 00:24:41,729
Get on out of here.
543
00:24:41,730 --> 00:24:45,024
All right, get a moving there...
544
00:24:45,025 --> 00:24:46,776
(Alice sighs)
545
00:24:46,777 --> 00:24:49,737
Ralph, I never thought
we'd get out of this alive.
546
00:24:49,738 --> 00:24:52,407
-(snaps fingers) -Sweetheart,
how did you manage it?
547
00:24:52,408 --> 00:24:55,076
A mere bag of shells.
548
00:24:55,077 --> 00:24:58,913
You see, Alice, there's a lot
you don't know about me.
549
00:24:58,914 --> 00:25:00,415
My fighting, for instance.
550
00:25:00,416 --> 00:25:04,544
I go pretty good
when I get going.
551
00:25:04,545 --> 00:25:07,630
See, the reason you don't know
about it is because I'm modest.
552
00:25:07,631 --> 00:25:10,967
I never tell you anything
about my prowess, you know.
553
00:25:10,968 --> 00:25:13,720
I just happen
to be a modest guy.
554
00:25:13,721 --> 00:25:15,763
Hey, I got to get downstairs.
555
00:25:15,764 --> 00:25:17,306
Why? Where are you going?
556
00:25:17,307 --> 00:25:19,475
I got to get down there
before Norton takes credit
557
00:25:19,476 --> 00:25:21,854
for this whole thing.
41517
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