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00:00:00,783 --> 00:00:01,958
- Warning.
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00:00:01,958 --> 00:00:03,090
The following program contains
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00:00:03,090 --> 00:00:04,787
really coarse language, weed,
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00:00:04,787 --> 00:00:06,658
alcohol consumption, smoking,
5
00:00:06,658 --> 00:00:09,922
and sexual Inferences.
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00:00:09,922 --> 00:00:11,402
This content may not be suitable
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00:00:11,402 --> 00:00:13,100
for viewers under 18.
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00:00:13,100 --> 00:00:15,363
To activate parental
controls, please press
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00:00:15,363 --> 00:00:17,278
the big go [beep]
yourself button
10
00:00:17,278 --> 00:00:18,627
on your remote control.
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00:00:19,628 --> 00:00:22,196
[upbeat music]
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00:00:31,031 --> 00:00:33,642
- All right. Okay,
boys guess what?
13
00:00:33,642 --> 00:00:34,512
Guess what? Guess what?
14
00:00:34,512 --> 00:00:36,036
- What?
15
00:00:36,036 --> 00:00:37,515
- You're not gonna
like this Bubs,
16
00:00:37,515 --> 00:00:38,821
but you're gonna
have to deal with it,
17
00:00:38,821 --> 00:00:40,344
but I'm getting a dog.
18
00:00:40,344 --> 00:00:41,998
- [Ricky] You aren't
getting a fucking dog.
19
00:00:41,998 --> 00:00:43,130
- I'm gonna get a
fucking dog, man.
20
00:00:43,130 --> 00:00:44,261
- Give me a steak knife Ricky.
21
00:00:44,261 --> 00:00:45,871
- [Ricky] A steak knife.
22
00:00:45,871 --> 00:00:46,698
- I'm getting a
fucking dog buddy.
23
00:00:46,698 --> 00:00:48,526
- Nevermind.
24
00:00:48,526 --> 00:00:49,614
- [Ricky] Well look at this
shit coming together eh.
25
00:00:51,094 --> 00:00:53,966
Hey, I wonder if he's
gonna do a dance for us.
26
00:00:53,966 --> 00:00:55,664
That'd really make
me happy right now.
27
00:00:55,664 --> 00:00:57,187
- Would it?
28
00:00:57,187 --> 00:00:58,362
- [Ricky] Yeah, I
might even dance
29
00:00:58,362 --> 00:00:59,972
along with the little guy.
30
00:00:59,972 --> 00:01:01,800
- What would make you so
happy about that, Ricky?
31
00:01:01,800 --> 00:01:03,846
- I love a little
dance on Friday.
32
00:01:05,282 --> 00:01:07,371
- You like to have
a little dance.
33
00:01:09,330 --> 00:01:11,506
- A wolf dog Bubs, it's gonna be
34
00:01:11,506 --> 00:01:13,377
a fucking wolf dog.
35
00:01:13,377 --> 00:01:14,378
- What is?
36
00:01:14,378 --> 00:01:16,250
- The dog I'm getting.
37
00:01:16,250 --> 00:01:19,035
- Don't get a wolf, you're
not getting a wolf dog.
38
00:01:19,035 --> 00:01:21,211
My kitties will not
like a wolf dog.
39
00:01:21,211 --> 00:01:23,126
- That's what I'm saying.
40
00:01:23,126 --> 00:01:24,997
You had kitties your entire
life. I've never had a pet.
41
00:01:24,997 --> 00:01:27,609
- You ever read the story
about the big, bad wolf, bud.
42
00:01:27,609 --> 00:01:28,871
- What happened in
the Big Bad Wolf?
43
00:01:28,871 --> 00:01:30,002
- It wasn't pretty.
44
00:01:30,002 --> 00:01:31,221
- What happened?
45
00:01:31,221 --> 00:01:32,179
- He got killed.
46
00:01:33,267 --> 00:01:34,833
- Did he? How'd he die?
47
00:01:34,833 --> 00:01:37,358
- I don't remember, but
I think he got eaten.
48
00:01:37,358 --> 00:01:40,752
- Okay. This is a Wolf dog
they said it's a chill dog
49
00:01:40,752 --> 00:01:42,189
- Are those brand new batteries?
50
00:01:42,189 --> 00:01:44,104
- I don't know.
51
00:01:44,104 --> 00:01:45,235
- Plus, what do you got
there, man? What is that?
52
00:01:45,235 --> 00:01:46,845
- It takes AAA.
53
00:01:49,935 --> 00:01:52,068
They might be still good
though. For all I know.
54
00:01:52,068 --> 00:01:53,896
- Yeah is there not?
55
00:01:53,896 --> 00:01:55,724
- But I can't find an on
switch, that's the problem.
56
00:01:55,724 --> 00:01:58,118
- Well that's the fucking
problem. He's got a trap door.
57
00:01:58,118 --> 00:01:59,641
[chuckles]
58
00:01:59,641 --> 00:02:00,772
- What the fuck are
you talking about?
59
00:02:00,772 --> 00:02:02,687
- I don't know.
60
00:02:02,687 --> 00:02:04,428
I just found him and Ricky
doesn't know what he does.
61
00:02:04,428 --> 00:02:06,604
- He, well, cause he
doesn't seem that exciting,
62
00:02:06,604 --> 00:02:08,389
but now we think he might be.
63
00:02:10,217 --> 00:02:11,392
- Well, we gotta figure what
the fuck the thing does now.
64
00:02:11,392 --> 00:02:12,697
- Maybe rip his tail off.
65
00:02:12,697 --> 00:02:14,308
- No, Ricky don't rip it off.
66
00:02:14,308 --> 00:02:15,831
- No, no, no, no.
67
00:02:15,831 --> 00:02:17,006
What if he gets
smacked on the head?
68
00:02:17,006 --> 00:02:18,834
- That might be his sensor
69
00:02:18,834 --> 00:02:20,357
Well, he's got no batteries
in him right now, boys.
70
00:02:20,357 --> 00:02:21,358
He's not gonna do
all fuck. Is he?
71
00:02:21,358 --> 00:02:22,925
- I Wasn't saying do it.
72
00:02:22,925 --> 00:02:24,535
I was just saying,
what if we did this?
73
00:02:24,535 --> 00:02:26,320
- Well, let me
put these back in.
74
00:02:26,320 --> 00:02:27,886
- Does this start yet?
75
00:02:27,886 --> 00:02:30,672
Or we just waiting until
this is done to start.
76
00:02:30,672 --> 00:02:32,195
- Come on.
77
00:02:32,195 --> 00:02:33,065
- That's like 30 year
old batteries, Bubs.
78
00:02:33,065 --> 00:02:33,892
- Hey Bubs,
79
00:02:33,892 --> 00:02:34,893
- Do something
80
00:02:34,893 --> 00:02:35,894
- What's your deal?
81
00:02:35,894 --> 00:02:37,069
- What do you do?
82
00:02:37,069 --> 00:02:37,896
- Talk to him. What's your name
83
00:02:37,896 --> 00:02:39,681
- Do something.
84
00:02:39,681 --> 00:02:40,682
- Maybe you gotta say
please. Bud's do something.
85
00:02:40,682 --> 00:02:42,249
- Maybe you gotta check.
86
00:02:42,249 --> 00:02:43,772
- Oh he moves and
stuff. I can tell.
87
00:02:43,772 --> 00:02:45,643
- He does dance.
88
00:02:45,643 --> 00:02:47,254
- He's got gears and stuff,
but there's no on switch.
89
00:02:47,254 --> 00:02:48,646
- Fuck, there has to be, man.
90
00:02:50,344 --> 00:02:52,172
- Come on.
91
00:02:52,172 --> 00:02:54,174
- Maybe you need this.
Do you need this back on?
92
00:02:55,523 --> 00:02:57,133
- I think the
batteries are dead.
93
00:02:57,133 --> 00:02:58,439
- Here. Look him up
online and tell him,
94
00:02:58,439 --> 00:03:00,310
get his manual going.
95
00:03:00,310 --> 00:03:03,270
- What the fuck is the name
of it? Has he got any numbers?
96
00:03:03,270 --> 00:03:04,619
- Nothing. He's
just a, a fucking.
97
00:03:04,619 --> 00:03:06,229
- What. What is this thing?
98
00:03:06,229 --> 00:03:08,144
[laughing]
99
00:03:08,144 --> 00:03:09,276
- Is he a squirrel?
100
00:03:09,276 --> 00:03:10,625
- He's a squirrel with a flower
101
00:03:13,149 --> 00:03:14,803
- He's a Prairie dog with
a flower and a heart.
102
00:03:14,803 --> 00:03:17,675
- And what were those
things on Caddy Shack?
103
00:03:17,675 --> 00:03:19,547
- A gopher.
104
00:03:19,547 --> 00:03:21,113
- Gopher could be a go, no
he's too small for a gopher
105
00:03:21,113 --> 00:03:22,854
- Do you ha not have any
more batteries, Ricky?
106
00:03:22,854 --> 00:03:26,118
- Battery operated
Prairie. What did I say?
107
00:03:26,118 --> 00:03:27,250
Prairie dog.
108
00:03:27,250 --> 00:03:28,817
- Oh, just wait. He's from.
109
00:03:28,817 --> 00:03:29,992
- Oh, here we go.
110
00:03:29,992 --> 00:03:31,994
- He's from Gemmy Industries.
111
00:03:31,994 --> 00:03:34,257
G E M M Y Gemmy Industries.
112
00:03:34,257 --> 00:03:35,824
- Man, you serious?
113
00:03:35,824 --> 00:03:39,219
- Yeah. Getter fired
up. Gemmy Industries.
114
00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:41,308
- Just a second. Let me get
it on the fucking Google.
115
00:03:41,308 --> 00:03:43,048
- Did we start yet?
116
00:03:43,048 --> 00:03:44,006
- We could start.
117
00:03:44,006 --> 00:03:44,833
- Just a second.
118
00:03:44,833 --> 00:03:46,356
- Gemmy
119
00:03:46,356 --> 00:03:47,357
- All the buttons
haven't been pushed
120
00:03:47,357 --> 00:03:48,532
- Oh, these have.
121
00:03:48,532 --> 00:03:50,055
- Okay. What is it? J E M M
122
00:03:50,055 --> 00:03:50,882
- Oh, but there's
more screws involved.
123
00:03:50,882 --> 00:03:51,100
- Was it J E?
124
00:03:51,927 --> 00:03:53,058
- Bubs?
125
00:03:53,058 --> 00:03:54,408
- J E?
- J E M M Y.
126
00:03:54,408 --> 00:03:55,409
- Industries.
127
00:03:55,409 --> 00:03:56,410
- Jemmy Industries. Yes.
128
00:03:56,410 --> 00:03:57,628
- Boys. This is fucked.
129
00:03:57,628 --> 00:03:58,542
Did we start?
130
00:03:58,542 --> 00:03:59,717
- There's a G
131
00:03:59,717 --> 00:04:01,806
- No. Ricky. You gotta start it.
132
00:04:01,806 --> 00:04:02,981
- G or J.
133
00:04:02,981 --> 00:04:03,808
- G.
134
00:04:05,810 --> 00:04:07,899
- How do you know
those batteries work?
135
00:04:07,899 --> 00:04:10,772
- Well, they were making the
horns go on the batteries.
136
00:04:10,772 --> 00:04:13,209
- Yeah, but he looks
like he needs more power.
137
00:04:13,209 --> 00:04:15,864
- He might. How old is
that fucking mouse thing?
138
00:04:15,864 --> 00:04:17,039
- I don't know.
139
00:04:17,039 --> 00:04:18,214
- He's pretty mysterious.
140
00:04:18,214 --> 00:04:19,694
- Is there a year in the thing?
141
00:04:19,694 --> 00:04:21,086
- No, he can't
find this company.
142
00:04:21,086 --> 00:04:23,001
- I found the company,
143
00:04:23,001 --> 00:04:24,481
but do you know how many toys
this thing the company makes?
144
00:04:24,481 --> 00:04:26,309
nothing was.
145
00:04:26,309 --> 00:04:27,745
- They can't make too
many gophers with fucking,
146
00:04:27,745 --> 00:04:29,791
- Just pick. Any
dancing, fucking animal.
147
00:04:29,791 --> 00:04:32,228
- What do you think of doing
I'm fucking Googling this shit.
148
00:04:32,228 --> 00:04:33,273
- He probably has the
same fucking God damned
149
00:04:33,273 --> 00:04:34,448
on off switch somewhere.
150
00:04:34,448 --> 00:04:36,319
- Gopher
151
00:04:36,319 --> 00:04:38,843
- Smart company, Let's hide
the fucking on off switch.
152
00:04:38,843 --> 00:04:40,105
Maybe it needs music.
153
00:04:41,237 --> 00:04:42,282
It could be cued by music.
154
00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:43,457
- What the fuck, see.
155
00:04:43,457 --> 00:04:44,762
- Check. One, two. Hey, bud.
156
00:04:44,762 --> 00:04:46,242
- Sing a song.
157
00:04:46,242 --> 00:04:51,073
- ♪ Oh, I'm a dancing
little mouse. ♪
158
00:04:52,161 --> 00:04:53,684
- He's not a mouse. [chuckles]
159
00:04:53,684 --> 00:04:54,511
- He's not a fucking,
he's not a hedgehog.
160
00:04:54,511 --> 00:04:56,078
- Oh, just wait.
161
00:04:56,078 --> 00:04:57,645
Oh, I feel something in
the back of his neck.
162
00:04:57,645 --> 00:04:59,211
- That's a good place to put it
163
00:04:59,211 --> 00:05:01,388
- No, I think he, you
smashed him, Ricky.
164
00:05:01,388 --> 00:05:02,563
- Did I?
165
00:05:02,563 --> 00:05:03,912
- Think so? I think he's broken.
166
00:05:03,912 --> 00:05:05,827
I think he's got a broken spine.
167
00:05:05,827 --> 00:05:07,524
- Well, let's take him here.
168
00:05:07,524 --> 00:05:09,831
Let me, you just
gotta love him maybe,
169
00:05:09,831 --> 00:05:11,659
and he'll come back to life.
170
00:05:11,659 --> 00:05:13,225
- Give him some love,
man. Let's go for it, man.
171
00:05:13,225 --> 00:05:15,140
- He's got a heart in
his hand and a rose.
172
00:05:15,140 --> 00:05:16,011
- Rick, just wait, I'm sure
we can make this thing work.
173
00:05:16,011 --> 00:05:17,534
Hello?
174
00:05:17,534 --> 00:05:18,535
- If you can convince
it that you love it,
175
00:05:18,535 --> 00:05:19,841
It'll start to dance.
176
00:05:19,841 --> 00:05:21,103
[upbeat music]
177
00:05:21,103 --> 00:05:22,104
- Are you kidding me?
178
00:05:22,104 --> 00:05:23,671
- No, you did not.
179
00:05:23,671 --> 00:05:26,282
♪ I think I love you,
I think I love you ♪
180
00:05:26,282 --> 00:05:30,112
♪ I think I love you, so
what am I afraid of? ♪
181
00:05:30,112 --> 00:05:31,679
[upbeat music continues]
182
00:05:31,679 --> 00:05:32,506
- Fuck.
183
00:05:33,811 --> 00:05:34,812
That's awesome.
184
00:05:34,812 --> 00:05:37,380
[upbeat music continues]
185
00:05:37,380 --> 00:05:39,817
- Oh, look, if you just help
him along a little bit, look.
186
00:05:39,817 --> 00:05:40,992
- Loosen him up, yeah.
187
00:05:42,951 --> 00:05:44,126
- That was fantastic.
188
00:05:44,126 --> 00:05:45,736
- It's in his foot, boys.
189
00:05:45,736 --> 00:05:49,349
[upbeat music] ♪I
think I love you.
190
00:05:49,349 --> 00:05:51,481
- I think I love you
191
00:05:51,481 --> 00:05:54,005
♪ I think I love you, so
what am I so afraid of? ♪
192
00:05:54,005 --> 00:05:54,963
[upbeat music continues]
193
00:05:54,963 --> 00:05:56,225
- Awesome man.
194
00:05:56,225 --> 00:05:57,400
- Look at him go, boys.
195
00:05:57,400 --> 00:06:00,664
- This is the Partridge family.
196
00:06:00,664 --> 00:06:03,275
- He's just, he's just
spreading love around the world.
197
00:06:03,275 --> 00:06:05,147
I love this guy that
just brought back
198
00:06:05,147 --> 00:06:07,497
a whole lot of memories. Man.
199
00:06:07,497 --> 00:06:09,107
Love this guy.
200
00:06:09,107 --> 00:06:10,587
- The hidden switch
is in his left foot.
201
00:06:11,501 --> 00:06:12,981
cocksucker.
202
00:06:12,981 --> 00:06:15,157
- What a great
little guy you are.
203
00:06:15,157 --> 00:06:16,550
Spreading the word of love.
204
00:06:18,421 --> 00:06:20,945
[deep exhale]
205
00:06:28,126 --> 00:06:31,391
- A lot of people think they
know that they can imagine what
206
00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:32,609
it's like. If they're in,
207
00:06:36,308 --> 00:06:38,441
fucking danger
around every corner,
208
00:06:38,441 --> 00:06:40,269
that old soap in
the shower shit,
209
00:06:40,269 --> 00:06:41,705
that soap in the shower shit,
210
00:06:41,705 --> 00:06:44,665
I'm talking about
shimmy shanking the guy,
211
00:06:44,665 --> 00:06:46,536
and fuck him when he's having,
212
00:06:46,536 --> 00:06:48,408
sitting down and having his
fucking gruel for supper.
213
00:06:48,408 --> 00:06:50,801
And that is what I
heard is gonna happen
214
00:06:50,801 --> 00:06:52,586
to yours fucking truly today.
215
00:06:54,414 --> 00:06:59,419
Now, one thing for certain, if
I get, when bubbles, I went,
216
00:07:01,246 --> 00:07:04,902
I ever that fucking ask what
I consider as a human being,
217
00:07:04,902 --> 00:07:09,080
but you know what? Some people
get all the fucking breaks.
218
00:07:09,080 --> 00:07:12,257
Yeah, Here's the fucking keys
to the cock sucking workshop.
219
00:07:12,257 --> 00:07:14,129
Why? Cause' fuck.
220
00:07:14,129 --> 00:07:17,175
You know what a too wide
fucking bittle bottle is?
221
00:07:17,175 --> 00:07:20,178
A bottle glass piece
of cock sucker.
222
00:07:20,178 --> 00:07:24,574
Well guess what? When bubbles
wasn't looking, I stole this.
223
00:07:26,402 --> 00:07:29,666
Yeah, that's gonna keep,
you know what about Ricky?
224
00:07:29,666 --> 00:07:33,540
The other thing about
him, he's really fucking.
225
00:07:37,369 --> 00:07:40,982
- One hour until I kill fucking
Jim Lahey in the cafeteria.
226
00:07:40,982 --> 00:07:43,985
I'm a little nervous,
a little bit excited.
227
00:07:43,985 --> 00:07:45,595
Let's put on some fucking tunes.
228
00:07:48,163 --> 00:07:50,078
Since bubbles wouldn't help
me get something to stab him
229
00:07:50,078 --> 00:07:53,603
with, I'm gonna have to build
my own little fucking stabber.
230
00:07:53,603 --> 00:07:55,126
So I got my toenail chippers.
231
00:07:55,126 --> 00:07:56,954
I just chip away at
this and sharping it up.
232
00:07:58,739 --> 00:08:01,481
It's not fucking working
very well though.
233
00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:02,482
[metal scraping sound]
234
00:08:02,482 --> 00:08:04,266
That's not working.
235
00:08:04,266 --> 00:08:05,528
I wonder if I could just
flatten this fucking thing out.
236
00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:08,096
[banging]
237
00:08:08,096 --> 00:08:09,532
Pretty fucking hard.
238
00:08:11,142 --> 00:08:12,753
Fuck, that's not gonna work.
239
00:08:12,753 --> 00:08:15,320
[spitting sound]
240
00:08:15,320 --> 00:08:19,237
Fuck. I have to keep chipping
away at this fucking thing,
241
00:08:19,237 --> 00:08:20,238
I guess.
242
00:08:20,238 --> 00:08:20,978
Still got an hour.
243
00:08:22,676 --> 00:08:24,025
Come on, mother fucker.
244
00:08:26,506 --> 00:08:28,420
[buzzer sound]
245
00:08:28,420 --> 00:08:29,247
Hey Bubs.
246
00:08:30,814 --> 00:08:31,641
What's going on?
247
00:08:31,641 --> 00:08:32,729
- Hey Ricky.
248
00:08:32,729 --> 00:08:33,556
- How are you?
249
00:08:33,556 --> 00:08:34,557
- I'm good.
250
00:08:34,557 --> 00:08:35,427
Listen, we gotta talk.
251
00:08:35,427 --> 00:08:36,951
- All right.
252
00:08:36,951 --> 00:08:38,039
- What are you hiding
back there? What's this?
253
00:08:38,039 --> 00:08:38,866
- Nothing.
254
00:08:38,866 --> 00:08:39,867
- Give me this.
255
00:08:39,867 --> 00:08:41,042
- It's just my hand.
256
00:08:41,042 --> 00:08:42,826
Well, just toothbrush.
257
00:08:44,306 --> 00:08:45,960
Sharpening it up. Are
you Ricky? Look at that.
258
00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:47,744
- Nope, I was not sharpening it.
259
00:08:47,744 --> 00:08:49,572
What happened was I
found there this morning.
260
00:08:49,572 --> 00:08:51,531
I don't know if it's a
squirrel maybe got in it,
261
00:08:51,531 --> 00:08:53,010
or a rat or mouse and it
just started eating it.
262
00:08:53,010 --> 00:08:54,795
- A squirrel fucking did that.
263
00:08:54,795 --> 00:08:55,970
- You don't want
cut your hand right?
264
00:08:55,970 --> 00:08:58,015
If you're brushing your teeth.
265
00:08:58,015 --> 00:08:59,843
- Oh Yeah. Oh yeah.
266
00:08:59,843 --> 00:09:02,324
Ricky, look at the look at
the done with a straight edge.
267
00:09:02,324 --> 00:09:04,935
Some kind of snippers.
268
00:09:04,935 --> 00:09:07,111
- Okay. Bub's you know what?
I've gotta make something.
269
00:09:07,111 --> 00:09:09,374
I've gotta kill Lahey today
in case he gets out or I get
270
00:09:09,374 --> 00:09:11,159
out, it's gotta be done in here.
271
00:09:11,159 --> 00:09:12,856
Cause it's not really that
illegal in jail to kill people.
272
00:09:13,944 --> 00:09:15,337
- What are you talking about?
273
00:09:16,251 --> 00:09:18,166
Ricky it's very illegal.
274
00:09:18,166 --> 00:09:20,516
You can't kill him in here
or you're gonna be in here
275
00:09:20,516 --> 00:09:21,343
forever.
276
00:09:21,343 --> 00:09:23,171
- No I won't.
277
00:09:23,171 --> 00:09:24,346
- It's the same as if you
did it on the outside.
278
00:09:24,346 --> 00:09:26,174
- It can't be you're in jail.
279
00:09:26,174 --> 00:09:28,045
- It is Ricky.
280
00:09:28,045 --> 00:09:30,570
It's a fucking fact, like you
need to research this stuff
281
00:09:30,570 --> 00:09:32,746
before you start
stabbing people.
282
00:09:32,746 --> 00:09:35,836
That's what happened to
Gonzo down in the other wing,
283
00:09:35,836 --> 00:09:37,011
you know? Big Gonzo.
284
00:09:37,011 --> 00:09:38,578
- Yeah. Yeah, he killed someone.
285
00:09:38,578 --> 00:09:40,362
- Yeah, and he's
in here for life.
286
00:09:40,362 --> 00:09:42,407
- Yeah, but I don't think
where'd he kill him.
287
00:09:42,407 --> 00:09:44,061
- In here.
- No, I don't think so.
288
00:09:44,061 --> 00:09:45,193
I think you got that wrong.
289
00:09:45,193 --> 00:09:47,108
- No, Ricky.
290
00:09:47,108 --> 00:09:49,153
He killed them in here. He was
supposed to be in for a week.
291
00:09:49,153 --> 00:09:51,068
Cause he was at the mall.
Pulled his pants down.
292
00:09:51,068 --> 00:09:53,984
Stuck his bird in someone's
ice cream. That was one week.
293
00:09:53,984 --> 00:09:56,378
- That's why they're
calling him ice cream cock.
294
00:09:56,378 --> 00:09:59,294
- Yes. That's why they were
calling him ice cream cock.
295
00:09:59,294 --> 00:10:01,513
That's what happened?
Everybody was teasing him.
296
00:10:01,513 --> 00:10:03,428
Ice cream cock, ice cream cock.
297
00:10:03,428 --> 00:10:05,343
He turns around. Oh
that's funny is it?
298
00:10:05,343 --> 00:10:06,518
[grunts]
299
00:10:06,518 --> 00:10:08,346
Fucking dead.
300
00:10:08,346 --> 00:10:10,522
And then he's in here for
life and that's the same thing
301
00:10:10,522 --> 00:10:12,307
that's gonna happen to you.
302
00:10:12,307 --> 00:10:15,266
- I didn't know that. I thought
he killed someone outside.
303
00:10:15,266 --> 00:10:19,053
- No in here. And Ricky
that's that's the thing.
304
00:10:19,053 --> 00:10:20,837
I mean, I can't lose you.
305
00:10:20,837 --> 00:10:22,404
- Fuck sakes.
306
00:10:22,404 --> 00:10:23,927
- I can't have you
in here forever.
307
00:10:23,927 --> 00:10:25,102
You need to come
back to the pack.
308
00:10:25,102 --> 00:10:26,669
- I can't.
309
00:10:26,669 --> 00:10:28,236
- You gotta think
of your grandson.
310
00:10:28,236 --> 00:10:30,107
- I know. I don't want
to be in here for life.
311
00:10:30,107 --> 00:10:31,935
I just thought that if it
was only for a few months or
312
00:10:31,935 --> 00:10:33,676
whatever, it'd be worth
getting rid of him forever.
313
00:10:34,634 --> 00:10:36,505
- Well, it's not,
314
00:10:36,505 --> 00:10:38,420
I mean you could punch him or
something like that, Ricky,
315
00:10:38,420 --> 00:10:42,990
but you gotta promise me
you're not gonna, you know,
316
00:10:42,990 --> 00:10:43,991
oh fuck.
317
00:10:43,991 --> 00:10:45,862
- Watch out for Donny!
318
00:10:45,862 --> 00:10:47,690
You okay Donny? That was
a little dinosaur I made.
319
00:10:47,690 --> 00:10:50,737
It took, it only took four
days. Pretty fucking nice. Eh.
320
00:10:52,173 --> 00:10:53,435
- You made that Ricky?
321
00:10:54,915 --> 00:10:58,005
That was that. That
was a, that's T-Rex.
322
00:10:58,005 --> 00:11:01,182
That was the most vicious
creature that ever walked the
323
00:11:01,182 --> 00:11:02,662
earth right there.
324
00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:04,751
- Yep. You can believe
whatever you want.
325
00:11:04,751 --> 00:11:06,230
And some people believe in
them. Some people don't,
326
00:11:06,230 --> 00:11:07,710
I guess I'm not really
ever gonna know.
327
00:11:09,146 --> 00:11:10,713
- What're you
talking about Ricky?
328
00:11:10,713 --> 00:11:12,628
They know they've
dug up the bones.
329
00:11:12,628 --> 00:11:14,674
I mean, they've put the
fucking things back together.
330
00:11:14,674 --> 00:11:16,197
- How do you know they're real?
331
00:11:16,197 --> 00:11:18,765
Did you ever meet a
dinosaur? No, I haven't.
332
00:11:18,765 --> 00:11:20,288
Like you don't really know?
333
00:11:20,288 --> 00:11:22,116
- Yes. You do know Ricky.
334
00:11:22,116 --> 00:11:25,597
They got their bones and they
can test them for DNA and
335
00:11:25,597 --> 00:11:27,904
carbon dating and all
that stuff. They know.
336
00:11:27,904 --> 00:11:29,776
- Oh, whatever.
337
00:11:29,776 --> 00:11:31,212
Some people think that, some
people don't believe Santa
338
00:11:31,212 --> 00:11:32,692
Jesus, God exists.
339
00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:34,258
But I know that's
true. I've seen them.
340
00:11:34,258 --> 00:11:36,086
That's the first thing
I made right there.
341
00:11:37,435 --> 00:11:38,915
- What the hell is that Ricky?
342
00:11:38,915 --> 00:11:40,743
- Oh, I don't really know.
343
00:11:40,743 --> 00:11:42,963
I got really high and I was
just thinking of doing a
344
00:11:42,963 --> 00:11:44,616
rainbow that gets
hit by tornado.
345
00:11:44,616 --> 00:11:46,618
So it just kind of
turns into this.
346
00:11:48,795 --> 00:11:49,665
- Rainbow tornado
347
00:11:51,711 --> 00:11:53,495
- Today, we're dealing with
348
00:11:53,495 --> 00:11:56,541
a very special drink
from Newfoundland.
349
00:11:56,541 --> 00:11:59,240
A lot of you people don't
know about Newfoundland.
350
00:11:59,240 --> 00:12:01,503
You've heard of
fucking idiot, Canada.
351
00:12:01,503 --> 00:12:03,810
but Newfoundland sticks
straight under the Atlantic
352
00:12:03,810 --> 00:12:06,421
and it's washed by the
fucking cruel winds of
353
00:12:06,421 --> 00:12:08,249
the north fucking Atlantic
354
00:12:08,249 --> 00:12:10,991
and the brave Newfoundland
sailors for 200 years,
355
00:12:10,991 --> 00:12:12,819
have been shipping out
356
00:12:12,819 --> 00:12:14,864
and they kiss the cod before
they go down in the big
357
00:12:14,864 --> 00:12:16,692
[indistinct]
358
00:12:16,692 --> 00:12:19,173
to get the fucking rum because
359
00:12:19,173 --> 00:12:21,523
the rum is where
it's at. Seriously.
360
00:12:21,523 --> 00:12:22,829
I think in fact [indistinct]
361
00:12:22,829 --> 00:12:25,657
[slurs speech]
362
00:12:25,657 --> 00:12:29,009
This is called
Newfoundland screech.
363
00:12:29,009 --> 00:12:30,619
It's in a bittle bottle.
364
00:12:30,619 --> 00:12:32,316
This is a fucking
Lagadoor Betiever.
365
00:12:32,316 --> 00:12:35,058
And this is a
fucking faithful dog.
366
00:12:35,058 --> 00:12:37,234
You'll put on a
bigger,[indistinct]
367
00:12:37,234 --> 00:12:39,019
[slurs] it's not
like a brink brassard
368
00:12:39,019 --> 00:12:41,195
but you can fucking
rescue these fucking dogs.
369
00:12:41,195 --> 00:12:43,066
And you know why?
370
00:12:43,066 --> 00:12:46,504
Cause it's got screech and
you can get 50 millimeters,
371
00:12:46,504 --> 00:12:48,593
50 proof screech, if you want.
372
00:12:48,593 --> 00:12:50,117
But before you drink it,
373
00:12:50,117 --> 00:12:52,815
you gotta be screeched
in the Newfoundland way.
374
00:12:52,815 --> 00:12:54,382
And the screeching
goes like this.
375
00:12:54,382 --> 00:12:56,906
You started off you
pour a little bottle,
376
00:12:57,820 --> 00:12:59,996
just excuse me. [slurs]
377
00:12:59,996 --> 00:13:03,217
You have to put this
right around [giggling]
378
00:13:03,217 --> 00:13:04,784
You have to put just the right.
379
00:13:06,437 --> 00:13:07,264
[gulps]
380
00:13:07,264 --> 00:13:08,788
Ah, do I?
381
00:13:08,788 --> 00:13:10,877
50 proof out of a
cup, made it up.
382
00:13:10,877 --> 00:13:12,922
Okay so here we go.
383
00:13:12,922 --> 00:13:15,229
Rule number one,
fill your little, you
guys rule number two,
384
00:13:15,229 --> 00:13:18,058
pick your MC. I'm not talking
about picking your MC.
385
00:13:18,058 --> 00:13:19,799
I'm talking about
master ceremony.
386
00:13:19,799 --> 00:13:21,365
[hiccups]
387
00:13:21,365 --> 00:13:23,193
I'll be the master
ceremonies today.
388
00:13:23,193 --> 00:13:25,065
Okay. Just pretend
you're the guy
389
00:13:25,065 --> 00:13:26,240
that's gonna be screeched. Okay.
390
00:13:26,240 --> 00:13:27,763
Here. I got the cod fish.
391
00:13:27,763 --> 00:13:30,026
Where the fucking cod fish.
392
00:13:30,026 --> 00:13:32,550
Just pretend I have the
cod fish in my hand.
393
00:13:32,550 --> 00:13:35,423
Your hand. Okay. Kiss the
cod right in the lips.
394
00:13:35,423 --> 00:13:39,296
There. now, that's step three
or step two or whatever.
395
00:13:39,296 --> 00:13:41,081
Anyway,
396
00:13:41,081 --> 00:13:42,952
I am gonna do the special
speech and then you're going do
397
00:13:42,952 --> 00:13:44,998
the special speech. Okay.
398
00:13:44,998 --> 00:13:46,826
Goes like this.
399
00:13:46,826 --> 00:13:50,960
From the waters of the Avalon
to the shores of Labrador.
400
00:13:52,353 --> 00:13:55,051
We always stuck together.
401
00:13:55,051 --> 00:13:57,793
I'm gonna rant, rave, and roar
402
00:13:57,793 --> 00:14:00,274
to those who'd ever been here.
403
00:14:01,753 --> 00:14:04,844
You'll soon understand
from coast to coast,
404
00:14:04,844 --> 00:14:06,541
we raise the toast cause
405
00:14:06,541 --> 00:14:10,110
♪we love you Newfoundland.
406
00:14:11,198 --> 00:14:13,113
But you don't drink yet.
407
00:14:13,113 --> 00:14:17,378
First I have to ask you the
question is you a screecher?
408
00:14:17,378 --> 00:14:19,293
And then you answer like this,
409
00:14:19,293 --> 00:14:23,906
Deed I am ye old cock and
long may yer big jib draw.
410
00:14:23,906 --> 00:14:27,954
That's it say that,
deed I am ye old cock.
411
00:14:27,954 --> 00:14:31,609
Say that, long may
yer big jib draw.
412
00:14:31,609 --> 00:14:33,307
You got it [indistinct slurs].
413
00:14:33,307 --> 00:14:34,699
And then, and only
then are you allowed
414
00:14:34,699 --> 00:14:36,397
to have a little
sippy-poo, okay?
415
00:14:40,009 --> 00:14:41,141
Down the hatch.
416
00:14:41,141 --> 00:14:43,012
[grunts]
417
00:14:43,012 --> 00:14:44,840
Okay.
418
00:14:44,840 --> 00:14:48,888
I'll tell you why Jamaica
farewell don't know
419
00:14:50,454 --> 00:14:52,326
where the nights are getting.
420
00:14:52,326 --> 00:14:55,155
You know what the national
food dish of Jamaica is?
421
00:14:55,155 --> 00:14:57,287
Fucking salt fish
from Newfoundland.
422
00:14:57,287 --> 00:14:59,811
And you know what the national
drink of Newfoundland is?
423
00:14:59,811 --> 00:15:03,772
Look, empty glassy-poo. Ah,
doesn't have to be, look.
424
00:15:03,772 --> 00:15:07,950
This is like [slurs]
an old story that I,
425
00:15:07,950 --> 00:15:10,910
you know why they call
me officer cod cock?
426
00:15:10,910 --> 00:15:15,392
Because I was screeched in
by my old friend, Ray Hurley.
427
00:15:15,392 --> 00:15:18,265
He look, he asked me if I'd be
the best man in his wedding.
428
00:15:18,265 --> 00:15:22,965
I agreed, but little did I know
I was gonna be all men there
429
00:15:22,965 --> 00:15:25,576
And it was the first time I
ever got a binky bonk thinking
430
00:15:25,576 --> 00:15:27,404
about other men's genitalia,
431
00:15:27,404 --> 00:15:29,711
because a lot of the guys
took off their bathing suits.
432
00:15:29,711 --> 00:15:31,104
Cause we were in a pool.
433
00:15:31,104 --> 00:15:32,932
It was about 50
fucking Newfoundlander,
434
00:15:32,932 --> 00:15:34,716
fucking blonde guys
with big muscles,
435
00:15:34,716 --> 00:15:36,544
cause they coming
out from out west.
436
00:15:36,544 --> 00:15:38,328
They were fucking working
on the oil patches.
437
00:15:38,328 --> 00:15:40,722
And anyway, I got some
getting [slurs indistinctly]
438
00:15:40,722 --> 00:15:43,290
and they said, get
out of the pool.
439
00:15:43,290 --> 00:15:45,988
We're gonna get, we're gonna
make him, he screech you in.
440
00:15:45,988 --> 00:15:47,903
So I, how much
and I [indistinct]
441
00:15:47,903 --> 00:15:51,080
So I took a little duck there
and I was holding the duck
442
00:15:51,080 --> 00:15:53,343
over my dick and I
climbed over the pool.
443
00:15:53,343 --> 00:15:57,173
And then they hand me [slurs]
the cod fish bring pool.
444
00:15:57,173 --> 00:16:00,046
And so what I did was I kiss
a cod and the cock and I
445
00:16:00,046 --> 00:16:02,439
shoved him down my little
Speedo. And guess what?
446
00:16:02,439 --> 00:16:05,747
Cod cock most open
right on my dicky-poo.
447
00:16:05,747 --> 00:16:07,488
That's where they called
me officer cod cock,
448
00:16:07,488 --> 00:16:09,272
cause I was running
all around the pool.
449
00:16:09,272 --> 00:16:11,144
They were laughing
their shits off.
450
00:16:11,144 --> 00:16:13,842
Anyway, I got screeched in
that day I tell yeah and I,
451
00:16:13,842 --> 00:16:18,803
something happened to me and
I changed, not for the better.
452
00:16:18,803 --> 00:16:21,328
I went into the shitty bits,
453
00:16:21,328 --> 00:16:24,853
but that's another story
tune in soon again,
454
00:16:24,853 --> 00:16:28,988
for Jim Lahey and another
one of my liquor stories,
455
00:16:28,988 --> 00:16:30,554
his seal.
456
00:16:30,554 --> 00:16:32,904
♪We love you. We love you.
457
00:16:32,904 --> 00:16:36,038
♪We love you Newfoundland.
458
00:16:36,038 --> 00:16:36,908
So,
459
00:16:38,214 --> 00:16:39,302
oh it's already full.
460
00:16:41,087 --> 00:16:43,698
Oh so, fill your glasses
bales in and give a little
461
00:16:43,698 --> 00:16:46,092
[indistinct]
462
00:16:49,399 --> 00:16:52,663
Thank you. Turn in more for
another story [indistinct].
463
00:16:54,056 --> 00:16:55,405
[giggling]
464
00:16:55,405 --> 00:16:57,146
Think I'll save this,
465
00:17:00,193 --> 00:17:01,672
kidding.
466
00:17:01,672 --> 00:17:03,935
[giggling]
467
00:17:05,676 --> 00:17:07,722
- All right. Allison Hope,
468
00:17:07,722 --> 00:17:12,205
Dear Julian, how do
I get over a guy?
469
00:17:12,205 --> 00:17:14,033
Long story short.
470
00:17:14,033 --> 00:17:16,122
I had the opportunity to ask
an old friend in marriage about
471
00:17:16,122 --> 00:17:19,342
a year ago did act
upon it because I'm
extremely shy when it
472
00:17:19,342 --> 00:17:22,345
comes to romantic stuff.
And now he has a girlfriend.
473
00:17:23,955 --> 00:17:26,828
Jesus, this is gonna be
a fucked up question.
474
00:17:26,828 --> 00:17:29,961
It's kind of long Allison
like shorten it down a bit.
475
00:17:29,961 --> 00:17:31,876
All right.
476
00:17:31,876 --> 00:17:33,704
He didn't find out until later
that I felt for him that way.
477
00:17:33,704 --> 00:17:36,664
And we haven't talked much
since he doesn't wanna
478
00:17:36,664 --> 00:17:39,145
screw things up
with his girlfriend.
479
00:17:39,145 --> 00:17:42,017
She regrets this. Now you have
a hole in your heart, blah,
480
00:17:42,017 --> 00:17:45,673
blah, blah, blah, blah.
481
00:17:45,673 --> 00:17:48,632
What should I do? I know that
I want to meet other people,
482
00:17:48,632 --> 00:17:50,069
but
483
00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:52,114
A. my mind keeps
going back to him and
484
00:17:52,114 --> 00:17:54,943
B. I'm a very nervous
and somewhat socially
awkward person.
485
00:17:56,771 --> 00:17:58,903
I'm also a bit concerned about
the expectation of hooking up
486
00:17:58,903 --> 00:18:01,210
or sex without some
level of commitment,
487
00:18:01,210 --> 00:18:05,388
giving our current culture and
any advice on would be great.
488
00:18:05,388 --> 00:18:07,608
Okay, fuck. Allison.
489
00:18:07,608 --> 00:18:09,566
I mean give it up. Okay.
490
00:18:09,566 --> 00:18:12,047
Okay. This is what you gotta do.
491
00:18:12,047 --> 00:18:15,094
Invite your friend over
for a couple drinks. Okay?
492
00:18:15,094 --> 00:18:17,705
Even take his little
girlfriend along or whatever.
493
00:18:17,705 --> 00:18:19,576
Get drunk with them.
494
00:18:19,576 --> 00:18:21,752
When she goes off to go to
the bathroom, you tell him,
495
00:18:21,752 --> 00:18:23,711
Hey, I wanna really
wanna bang you.
496
00:18:23,711 --> 00:18:25,191
I've had these feelings for you.
497
00:18:25,191 --> 00:18:27,236
I really want to bang
you, we're drunk.
498
00:18:27,236 --> 00:18:30,283
It's probably I'm I'm
outta line right now maybe,
499
00:18:30,283 --> 00:18:32,502
but I want to screw
the ass off ya and
500
00:18:32,502 --> 00:18:34,156
I can't get you outta my mind.
501
00:18:34,156 --> 00:18:36,027
Do that. That will help you out.
502
00:18:37,855 --> 00:18:39,944
I mean, you know, don't
worry about the other chick.
503
00:18:39,944 --> 00:18:42,121
He's only been going out with
her for a year and if you've
504
00:18:42,121 --> 00:18:44,993
known this person for a long
time, then if he likes you,
505
00:18:44,993 --> 00:18:46,995
he'll he'll bang you.
Especially if he's drunk,
506
00:18:46,995 --> 00:18:49,911
he'll brush off the other chick.
507
00:18:49,911 --> 00:18:52,261
Maybe get him to make
an excuse, bang the guy.
508
00:18:52,261 --> 00:18:54,481
And I mean, as for
this other stuff,
509
00:18:54,481 --> 00:18:56,700
you're socially awkward.
Liquor will help you out.
510
00:18:56,700 --> 00:18:58,572
Okay.
511
00:18:58,572 --> 00:19:00,139
You're a bit concerned about
hooking up and having sex.
512
00:19:00,139 --> 00:19:01,618
Everybody's banging
these days. Okay.
513
00:19:01,618 --> 00:19:03,359
There's protection. Just go.
514
00:19:03,359 --> 00:19:06,406
What? I mean if this guy
doesn't go for what I just said,
515
00:19:06,406 --> 00:19:08,669
go out and get banged.
Get drunk, get banged.
516
00:19:08,669 --> 00:19:11,237
Make sure you don't hook
up with some creepy dick.
517
00:19:11,237 --> 00:19:13,500
All right.
518
00:19:15,850 --> 00:19:16,851
Aidan Fry,
519
00:19:16,851 --> 00:19:18,766
Dear Julian.
520
00:19:18,766 --> 00:19:19,941
What's the fastest and easiest
way for a 16 year old to make
521
00:19:19,941 --> 00:19:20,768
money?
522
00:19:21,943 --> 00:19:24,380
All right. That's an easy one.
523
00:19:24,380 --> 00:19:28,254
The fastest and easiest way to
make money is to go steal it.
524
00:19:28,254 --> 00:19:29,820
Okay. You can rob somebody.
525
00:19:29,820 --> 00:19:31,605
It's very easy thing
to do, but you're 16.
526
00:19:31,605 --> 00:19:34,347
You're probably not that
bright and you'll probably get
527
00:19:34,347 --> 00:19:36,262
caught and go to jail.
528
00:19:36,262 --> 00:19:40,179
So what you have to do is do
what normal 16 year olds do.
529
00:19:40,179 --> 00:19:42,181
I mean, I was always
breaking the law.
530
00:19:42,181 --> 00:19:44,139
I never really had a real job.
531
00:19:44,139 --> 00:19:46,707
I worked at a pizza joint for
about a month and that sucked
532
00:19:46,707 --> 00:19:47,882
what you should do.
533
00:19:47,882 --> 00:19:49,971
Get a fucking paper route man.
534
00:19:51,407 --> 00:19:52,800
No that you're too,
too old for that.
535
00:19:54,497 --> 00:19:57,108
Get a fucking job at a
fast food restaurant. Okay.
536
00:19:57,108 --> 00:19:59,894
It's shitty, but it'll
teach you good work ethic.
537
00:19:59,894 --> 00:20:02,375
Maybe you'll make
something of yourself, man.
538
00:20:02,375 --> 00:20:04,377
But easy, fast way of doing it.
539
00:20:04,377 --> 00:20:07,815
When you're 16, there's
no other way of doing it.
540
00:20:07,815 --> 00:20:09,599
If you wanna do it easy and
fast, you gotta break the law.
541
00:20:09,599 --> 00:20:12,385
So don't want, I don't
suggest you do that,
542
00:20:12,385 --> 00:20:14,517
but I don't know
how stupid are you.
543
00:20:14,517 --> 00:20:17,085
You are or how smart you
are. So I don't know.
544
00:20:17,085 --> 00:20:19,218
Can't really help you out dude.
545
00:20:19,218 --> 00:20:22,743
- When the person
invented the pencil, okay.
546
00:20:22,743 --> 00:20:24,745
They didn't invent
the fucking eraser.
547
00:20:26,225 --> 00:20:28,618
How many years after
the pencil was invent?
548
00:20:28,618 --> 00:20:31,012
- I think that would
be expecting a lot.
549
00:20:31,012 --> 00:20:32,666
I mean, come up with a pencil,
550
00:20:32,666 --> 00:20:34,885
like you just like
automatically, well fuck bud,
551
00:20:34,885 --> 00:20:36,409
you gotta come up with
that. You gotta get,
552
00:20:36,409 --> 00:20:38,237
come up with something
gets rid of it.
553
00:20:38,237 --> 00:20:40,239
- So how many years later.
554
00:20:40,239 --> 00:20:42,197
- I'm gonna say a lot.
555
00:20:42,197 --> 00:20:43,024
- Like how many?
556
00:20:44,591 --> 00:20:45,418
- 20?
557
00:20:45,418 --> 00:20:46,549
- Nope, 22.
558
00:20:46,549 --> 00:20:48,290
- I say fucking, 200.
559
00:20:50,510 --> 00:20:51,337
- 229.
560
00:20:53,164 --> 00:20:55,341
- It's 220 years.
561
00:20:56,429 --> 00:20:57,995
- That was pretty fucking crazy.
562
00:20:57,995 --> 00:20:59,954
- That's a fucking long
time to knock on man.
563
00:20:59,954 --> 00:21:03,479
- It's 220 years. Holy
fuck, I was sort of joking.
564
00:21:03,479 --> 00:21:05,307
- No. So somebody
in invent the pencil
565
00:21:05,307 --> 00:21:08,223
and then nobody for
220 years thought, fuck
566
00:21:08,223 --> 00:21:11,574
I wish I could get rid of that
thing that I just wrote on
567
00:21:11,574 --> 00:21:13,794
that page. Cause if I
could just erase that.
568
00:21:13,794 --> 00:21:16,449
- So really, eraser
guy's smarter
569
00:21:17,972 --> 00:21:20,670
and probably a fuck
of a lot more richy.
570
00:21:20,670 --> 00:21:21,802
- Than pencil man?
571
00:21:21,802 --> 00:21:22,803
- Yes.
572
00:21:22,803 --> 00:21:24,718
- I don't think so.
573
00:21:24,718 --> 00:21:26,763
- A pencil man probably got
pretty boring after a while.
574
00:21:26,763 --> 00:21:29,288
- Yeah, but he had 220
years to make his fortune
575
00:21:29,288 --> 00:21:31,681
before eraser guy
even shower up.
576
00:21:31,681 --> 00:21:34,249
- But eraser guy probably sold
stuff for a lot more money
577
00:21:34,249 --> 00:21:36,120
and everybody needed one,
578
00:21:36,120 --> 00:21:38,862
cause they already had the
pencils from pencil guy.
579
00:21:38,862 --> 00:21:40,429
- Yeah. But eraser guy,
580
00:21:40,429 --> 00:21:44,215
he took too fucking long
and he missed the boat.
581
00:21:44,215 --> 00:21:47,088
Although once he figured out
582
00:21:47,088 --> 00:21:49,308
how to make those
smelly erasers.
583
00:21:49,308 --> 00:21:51,310
- Oh see that was a
whole new level for him.
584
00:21:51,310 --> 00:21:53,224
- The strawberry
erasers I bet you
585
00:21:53,224 --> 00:21:55,096
- That's the thing.
586
00:21:55,096 --> 00:21:56,837
Pencil guy just stick stuck
with the same old, the pencil.
587
00:21:56,837 --> 00:21:57,968
That was it.
588
00:21:57,968 --> 00:21:59,796
- Well, no he.
589
00:21:59,796 --> 00:22:01,668
- At some point eraser guy went
to him, said, bud, come on,
590
00:22:01,668 --> 00:22:03,844
you gotta let me in here and
put me on top of your pencils.
591
00:22:03,844 --> 00:22:05,454
And they made some sort
of a deal, I guess.
592
00:22:05,454 --> 00:22:07,630
- Like the peanut butter
and chocolate people.
593
00:22:07,630 --> 00:22:09,240
- But he never made
many changes to it.
594
00:22:09,240 --> 00:22:11,982
Whereas eraser guy he's
always coming up with
595
00:22:11,982 --> 00:22:13,810
something new and cool.
596
00:22:13,810 --> 00:22:15,464
- So he probably did a deal
with him where he is like, look,
597
00:22:15,464 --> 00:22:18,772
we'll put my eraser on
the end of your pencil,
598
00:22:18,772 --> 00:22:20,861
splitter 50, 50.
599
00:22:20,861 --> 00:22:23,690
But then he probably went,
you know what? Fuck you, bud.
600
00:22:23,690 --> 00:22:25,561
I'm gonna make
601
00:22:25,561 --> 00:22:27,650
fucking strawberries short
cake erasers, and sell them
602
00:22:27,650 --> 00:22:29,304
- Oh. And then he started
making those ones,
603
00:22:29,304 --> 00:22:31,001
the little puzzle
erasers and shit.
604
00:22:31,001 --> 00:22:33,352
He he's always coming
up with it, eraser guy.
605
00:22:33,352 --> 00:22:34,831
He's a smart fucking dude.
606
00:22:34,831 --> 00:22:36,398
- Eraser guy.
607
00:22:36,398 --> 00:22:38,139
- Or maybe it's a
woman probably is.
608
00:22:38,139 --> 00:22:39,619
- Probably is.
609
00:22:39,619 --> 00:22:42,361
- If you guys ever
eaten an eraser tried.
610
00:22:42,361 --> 00:22:43,927
- Yes.
611
00:22:43,927 --> 00:22:45,059
- Chewed on them,
the grape ones.
612
00:22:45,059 --> 00:22:46,365
They're not great.
613
00:22:46,365 --> 00:22:47,322
- They don't taste like grape.
614
00:22:47,322 --> 00:22:49,150
- Smell good.
615
00:22:49,150 --> 00:22:50,760
If you're keep smelling through
your nose as you're chewing
616
00:22:50,760 --> 00:22:51,848
them, not bad.
617
00:22:53,372 --> 00:22:55,156
- Okay. There's a
tip for everybody.
618
00:22:55,156 --> 00:22:57,071
- Why?
619
00:22:57,071 --> 00:22:59,421
- If you're gonna eat one
of those scented erasers,
620
00:22:59,421 --> 00:23:01,728
breathe in as you chew.
So you can at least smell.
621
00:23:01,728 --> 00:23:03,294
It.
622
00:23:03,294 --> 00:23:04,295
- Smells like it
tastes good, but.
623
00:23:04,295 --> 00:23:05,819
- It doesn't taste good.
624
00:23:05,819 --> 00:23:07,734
It's a fucking eraser.
625
00:23:07,734 --> 00:23:10,693
- Remember that time you got a
pencil erasers shoved in your
626
00:23:10,693 --> 00:23:12,260
pencil hole and you
couldn't get it out?
627
00:23:12,260 --> 00:23:14,523
- I knew you were gonna
fucking bring that up.
628
00:23:14,523 --> 00:23:16,090
- Well. It's worth
talking about.
629
00:23:16,090 --> 00:23:18,222
- Well, it was a
fucking accident.
630
00:23:18,222 --> 00:23:21,269
- How I still, you
never clarified why you,
631
00:23:21,269 --> 00:23:22,879
- I had a pencil in my pocket.
632
00:23:22,879 --> 00:23:24,794
There was a hole in my pocket.
633
00:23:24,794 --> 00:23:28,015
I got booted by this chick
who was in front of me by
634
00:23:28,015 --> 00:23:30,713
accident eraser went
through the pocket.
635
00:23:30,713 --> 00:23:34,413
Bing didn't have underwear on
that day. Right in the pistol.
636
00:23:34,413 --> 00:23:35,849
And that's when I
went to take it out.
637
00:23:35,849 --> 00:23:38,286
- Awfully fishy to me, Julian.
638
00:23:38,286 --> 00:23:39,679
- What do you think I was doing?
639
00:23:39,679 --> 00:23:42,464
- What are the
mathematical chances?
640
00:23:42,464 --> 00:23:46,033
- I think you were, were
sitting around big going.
641
00:23:46,033 --> 00:23:47,774
Wonder if that'll
fit in my best hole.
642
00:23:47,774 --> 00:23:49,123
- No I didn't.
643
00:23:49,123 --> 00:23:50,559
- That's what I think.
644
00:23:50,559 --> 00:23:51,952
- Who would do
something like that?
645
00:23:52,866 --> 00:23:54,694
Not me.
646
00:23:54,694 --> 00:23:56,435
There's people out there
that probably would do that,
647
00:23:56,435 --> 00:23:57,566
but not this guy.
648
00:23:58,654 --> 00:24:00,526
- Maybe you're trying to erase
649
00:24:00,526 --> 00:24:02,136
what happened the night before.
650
00:24:03,224 --> 00:24:05,792
[upbeat music]
651
00:24:14,322 --> 00:24:17,325
[seagulls chirping]
652
00:24:19,109 --> 00:24:21,590
[fish sounds]
48484
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