All language subtitles for That.Wonderful.Urge.1948.720p.WEBRip.x264.AAC-[YTS.MX]

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[ Woman ]
Thomas Jefferson Tyler!

He ought to be horsewhipped
for using that name.

Thomas Jefferson Tyler!

He's probably one of
those chinless hacks...

who bribes chambermaids
to peek through keyholes.

Thomas Jefferson Tyler!

And he calls that writing,
I suppose.

I've seen better writing
on a board fence.

[ Bells Jingling ]
[ Dogs Barking ]

♪ [ Band ]

♪ [ Stops ]

Oh, there he is.

One, please.

That's the young man
I was telling you about.

Oh.

Oh, hello there!
Won't you join us?
Good evening. Thank you.

This is Mr.--
What is your name again?
Thomas. Tom Thomas.

Tom-Tom. How quaint.
Sounds Indian.

This is my niece,
Sara Farley.

Good evening.
And the Count de Guyon.

How do you do?
How do you do?

Miss Sara Farley
of the Farley chain.

I can hardly believe it.
Sara, show him
a grocery store.

You know, I've bean reading
those articles about you.
Really?

Yes. I run a small-town paper,
and the news syndicates brought
the series to my attention.

How interesting.

Oh, naturally,
I didn't touch them.
Oh? Why not?

Why, I wouldn't
print things like that.
I think it's outrageous.

Besides, the folks in my town
are opposed to that sort
of nasty writing.

Didn't I tell you
he was charming?

Would you like
to dance?
Not now, André.

Tell me, Mr., uh--
Thomas.

Thomas. Do people
in small towns realize
that I'm being libeled?

Of course.

They're just like city folk,
Miss Farley, except that they
have a sense of fairness.

You see, they-they
rather like you.

They feel that you've been
a victim of circumstances
and bad public relations.

They feel that it's happened
because your parents died
when you were a little girl.

Well, you-- you need
a mother and father,
or... husband.

Uh, shall we dance now,
dear?

This is a revelation,
Mr. Thomas.

I always felt
that most people believed
those stories.

Oh, no.
No, Miss Farley.

You-You mustn't lose faith
in the real people.

They understand you.

♪ [ Band ]

I'm sorry. I-- I shouldn't
have started all this,
spoiling your evening.

I don't suppose
you'd care to dance.
I'd love to.

Well, thank you.
Excuse me.

He's nice.
Don't you think?

I do not. I think he's
trying to take the bread
right out of my mouth.

He's stalking her now--
my pigeon. I can tell by
the look on his face.

Hello. Oh, let me speak to
Miss Sara Farley, please.

Yeah.

[ Phone Rings ]

Hello.

Oh, hello!

Tonight? Oh, no.
I can't, Mr. Thomas.

I promised
Count de Guyon that I'd go
dogsledding with him.

No.
[ Laughing ]
Dogsledding.

Okay. I'll try you again
some other time.

Have fun...
with the dogs.

[ Laughs ]
Thanks. And you
will call me again?

Good. Good-bye.

Hello.
Get me the sports desk.

Hello, sports desk?
This is Mr. Thomas speaking.

Yeah, I'd like to talk to
someone in charge of dogsleds.

Oh, I see.
Well, have him call me as soon
as he comes in, will you?

It's very important--
a matter of life and death.

Thanks.

[ Bells Jingling ]

[ Man ]
Mush!

Mush!

Driver,
where's the other sled?

No speak English.
Me Eskimo. Ugh.

And what are you
doing here?

Oh, I'm an old dog driver
from way back. Mush!

[ Dogs Barking ]

Oh, Mr. Thomas.

Mr. Thomas.
Are you all right?

[ Mutters ]
Why'd you have to slug me?

I didn't.
You slugged yourself
on that tree.

Was I out long?
Not long.
Can you sit up?

I guess so. Oh!

You're hurt!

It's nothing at all.
Just a compound fracture
of the skull.

I guess I deserved it though
for playing the smart aleck.

You need first aid.
I need peace and quiet.

Come on. Get up.

We'd better start
back to the lodge,
if we can find it.

Hey, look.
Look. There's one of those
emergency ski cabins.

How very convenient,
Mr. Thomas.

Well, we can
at least keep warm
until they find us.

Keep still!
How can I if you
keep poking into it?

I'm trying to decide
if it's too deep for iodine.
Iodine?

In my first-aid course
they told me that--
Oh, no. Never mind.

It's just a scratch,
believe me. Thank you.

And anyway, I have
something much better.
There we go.

Well, you came very
well-equipped, Mr. Thomas.
Do we pour it on your head?

Is that the way
you like it?

There's nothing wrong
with my head.

I don't know.
You're probably suffering
from shock and exposure.

Oh, no.
Just curiosity.

You went to quite some pains
to get me alone. Why?

Pains is right.
But that tree wasn't
in the script.

Oh, here.
Hold these a minute.

I hope you won't laugh
at me, Miss Farley, but...

I've written an article
about you for my little paper.
You too?

Yes. Well, I wouldn't think
of publishing it without
having you read it first.

That's a new wrinkle anyway.
So that's why I wanted an hour
or so alone with you.

Here. If you don't mind,
this is, uh--

Begins right--

"Few people know the true
story behind Sara Farley.

"She's been hurt--
deeply hurt--

"by all the forces
always arrayed against
inherited wealth.

"She is a fine,
warm human being...

"who has been taught
to conceal
her true emotions...

behind an icy wall."

Well!
You-- Do you like it?

How could I help liking it?
But you're not really going
to print this, Mr, Thomas?

You know, I think
it's time someone printed
your side of the story,

a sort of rebuttal to people
like that-- that Tyler.

Oh, let's forget him.
Here's to Tyler.
May he drop dead.

Well, is it accurate?
Have I my facts straight?

Well, this isn't true
that I'm engaged to
André de Guyon.

He's just
an amusing companion.
And up here--

Well, look. Why don't you
go through the whole thing,
tell me the real story?

Then I can use quotes,
make it authentic.

You see, with quotes from you,
we can make that stuff that
Tyler's been writing look sick.

Well, if you'd like.
I'm not really
that interesting.

Oh, you are to me.
Go on. Tell me everything
from the beginning.

And sometimes I wish
I'd been born poor,

and then I kick myself
and say, "Don't be an idiot,"

because I'm fond
of all the things
money can buy too.

Even André, who comes high,
prices being what
they are these days.

It's a very dull and
prosaic story, and I've talked
about myself much too long.

Oh, no, no. I could
listen to you all night.

I've never told anyone
these things before.

Have you enough
for your article?
Plenty.

I have your permission
to quote you?
Of course.

This is dynamite,
for Tyler, that is.

Here's to Tyler.
May he drop dead.
May he drop dead.

I hate to think what he'd do
with some of those quotes.

Well, he, uh-- he probably
sees things from a slightly
different angle.

Yes, through a keyhole.
Oh, I-- I wouldn't be
too hard on Tyler.

He has to make
a living after all.

Not as far as I'm concerned,
he doesn't.

Well, I do happen to know
that he has a-- a fine record
as a war correspondent.

That makes it even worse
that he should stoop so low.

And let's not
waste any more time
talking about him.

Well, this article will
fix him... but good.

You're not very experienced
in newspaper work,
are you, Mr. Thomas?

Tom.
Are you, Tom?

Well, I make
a living at it.

Don't print
that article.
What?

It'll only make you
look foolish.

Me?

In the first place,
it simply isn't
good journalism.

I know, Tom.
I'm the expert.

They started in on me
when I was in kindergarten.

When I won a prize
for deportment, there wasn't
a line about it,

but it was front page news
when I tried to scratch
the eyes out...

of that little beast
of a Vandermeer girl.

The great reading public
isn't interested
in normal human beings.

They want freaks, served up
with all the trimmings.

In the second place, you know
what they'll say about you--
Tyler and people like that?

That I took you in,
made a fool of you,

even that I paid you
to write about me favorably.

I'm grateful to you, Tom,
for wanting to do it,

but it just
isn't worth it.

Do you care
what they say about me,
Miss Farley?

Sara.
Do you, Sara?

Yes, I do, Tom.
Why?

Oh, I don't know.
Because--

Because you're such
a bad dog driver and because
you get hurt so easily.

I don't want you
to get hurt for my sake.

Then you'll become
warped and cynical
like the rest of them.

You're too nice
for that.

Why are you looking at me
like that, Tom?

As if you'd never
seen me before.

Maybe it's the whiskey
or the crack on the head
I took.

Or maybe it's just you.

[ Man ]
Hey! Anybody in there?

I guess
we're being rescued.

I'm afraid we are.

Tom's room's over there.

[ Knocking ]

[ Knocking Continues ]
Come in.

Good morning, sir.
Oh, good morning.

A little early,
aren't you?
It's 9:00, your usual time.

Sort of overslept yourself,
didn't you?

I had a big night.
Guess you was at the fire.

- What fire?
- The old courthouse
at Three Forks.

Here.
It's in the local paper.

Burned to the ground.
Nothing left of it.

Oh, a lot of folks
went over from the lodge.

Yes, sir. We'll miss
the old courthouse.

Lot of Sun Valley romances
wound up there.

You know, we used to
have two or three
weddings a season.

Regular Gretchen Green,
you might say.

Ow.

Uh, will that
be all, sir?

Yes, yes. That'll be all.
I'll sign that later.

[ Door Closes ]

Oh, hello. Let me speak
to Miss Sara Farley, please.

[ Woman ] Miss Farley
left word that she was not to
be awakened until she called.

May I take a message?
No, no. That'll be
all right. Thanks.

Hello? Yeah, give me
the transportation desk.

[ Man ] Transportation desk.
When is the next train
out of here?

9:35, sir.
Well, this is
Mr. Thomas speaking.

Can you get me
a reservation on it?
Anything?

But that's in half an hour.
I'll be ready.
Can you get me on it?

Yes, sir.
Thanks.

Where are they?
I'm starving.

So am I.
I'll look and see.

Are they coming?
André is,
but I don't see Tom.

Why don't you and André
go ahead and have lunch?
Well!

Have you seen Tom?
No, I haven't.

And as a matter of fact,
I don't think you will either.

Why not?
I inquired at the desk
and found he's checked out.

Checked out? When?
About an hour ago.

Without even saying anything?
Why would he do that?

He had his reasons.

André, have you
that wedding ring you're
always flashing at me?

Why, yes, Sara dear.
I have it right here.
This is so sudden.

I only want to borrow it.
Now, Sara.

That lying, sneaking brute,
twisting everything I say.

How was Sun Valley,
Miss Farley?
Did you see Tom Tyler?

[ All Chattering ]
Please! Please.

Is that a wedding ring?
It's a secret?

Come on.
Let's have the story.
Tell us about it.

All right, gentlemen.
All right.

Well, it was a most
surprising thing really.
It was love at first sight.

It happened at Sun Valley.

At first I disliked him
intensely, but he swept me off
my feet and we were married.

At last
I've found a man with whom
I can be really happy.

And to prove my love,
I've-- I've settled
a million dollars on him.

A million dollars!
Who is it? The count?

Oh, no.
Well, what's his name?

Well, who is it?
Tell us.

Tom-Tom.
Who?

Tom-Tom. Better known
as Thomas Jefferson Tyler.

Tom Tyler?
Oh, no!

Hey, are you kidding?
How long has this been going on?
Come on. Miss Farley!

You look wonderful,
Jess.
You too.

I ought to.
I did nothing but sleep
on the train.

Didn't you turn out
any more copy?
Yes.

We caught up
on all the other stuff.

Yes, I did one more,
and then the local gazette ran
my picture and I had to beat it.

Thank you.
[ Horn Honking ]

"In a way, the public has
always misunderstood her.

"Few people
know the true story
behind Sara Farley.

"She has been hurt--
deeply hurt--

by all the forces always arrayed
against inherited wealth."

You call this
a detached viewpoint?

Well, you know,
I got a different slant.
It reads like a testimonial.

"She is a fine,
warm human being"--
[ Chuckles ]

"who has been taught to
conceal her true emotions
behind an icy wall."

Let me tell you something,
Duffy. She's not the kind
of girl we thought she was.

Courier. Dispatch.
Observer.
Thanks. "Even as a"--

Findlay. Come in here.

What's the matter?
What are you
doing that for?

Findlay,
get him out of here.
Him? Why?

Get him out, or I'll print
the next edition in his blood.
Oh, no! Wait a minute.

Don't speak to me,
you Benedict Arnold.

But this isn't true.
It's a lie. It's a hoax--
Get him out of here!

Come on. Will you, please?
No. I'm not going.
You don't believe this.

Stabbed me in the back
for a dirty million bucks.
It's a lie.

I wouldn't believe
your dying confession!

I'll get her on the phone.
I'll prove it.
Not one of our phones.

Get Mr. Sara Farley
out of here!
I'm trying to explain.

You two men
like working here?
Yeah. Why?

Sure.
Well, he doesn't
work here anymore.

So if you want to keep on
working here, throw him out!

Shut up a minute.
Please.

Hello? Hello.
Is this the Farley residence?

Well?

All right. All right.
I'll use the phone booth
in the hall.

Out!

Tom, are you sure?

Am I sure what?
You didn't fall for her?

Of course I didn't.
She's not a woman.
She's a corporate structure.

She asked for it,
and she'll get it.

I'll write a series
of articles about her
that'll burn her to a crisp.

For what paper?
What's that?

Remember?
Duffy fired you.
I can get another job.

I wonder,
after everything
that's happened.

All right then.
I'll do the series
for-- for Pravda.

They'll eat it up.
Typical capitalist behavior.

Oh, Tom, be serious.
The sensible thing is
to demand a retraction.

From her? Not a chance.
From the papers
that ran the story.

Yeah, I guess you're right.
I could do that.

Good.
Will you drop me off
at my place?

Wire the papers,
and then try and get
a good night's sleep.

Good night.

There he is!
Can I have
your autograph?

[ Squealing, Chattering ]
Now, wait a minute!

Let go!
Everybody, get away now.
Go on home. Beat it.

Go away and let me alone.

Go on and mind
your own business.
Get away from me!

Mrs. Riley! Go away!

Mrs. Riley!

[ Screaming, Shouting ]
Mrs. Ri--

You get out of here,
you bunch of hoodlums!

This is a respectable house,
and I don't want any trouble
with any of you!

Thank you, Mrs. Riley.
Mr. Tyler,
you rascal, you.

Oh, no, please,
Mrs. Riley.

How come you never
said a word about it,
you slyboots?

You dear boy,
I could kiss you.
Oh, no, no.

Oh, no, you don't!
Don't you dare come
into my house.

You get right out!

Every one of you, get out
of my house and you stay out!
You hear me?

[ Women Chanting ]
We want Tyler!
We want Tyler!

Hello.
Get me Western Union.

Hello. Western Union?
This is Lexington 2-1598.
[ Chanting Continues ]

Yeah. I want to send
a telegram to the Courier,
Dispatch, Observer--

all the New York newspapers.

That's right.
Now, this is the message:

I categorically de--

Hmm? Oh, never mind.

I positively deny that I
am married to Sara Farley.

I demand an immediate
retraction and apology.

Signed
Thomas Jefferson Tyler.

Of course it's the truth!
You send it just the way
I gave it to you.

All right.

♪ We want Tyler, we want Tyler
We want Tyler ♪

♪ [ Loud Big Band ]

♪ [ Volume Down ]

[ Man On Radio ]
Slicko, gentlemen, gives
the hair that smooth gloss...

that makes you irresistible
to the ladies.

As irresistible
as Romeo was to Juliet,

as Anthony was to Cleopatra,

as Tom-Tom Tyler was
to Sara Farley.

Dedicating the next number
to this romantic pair,

you will now hear a new
recording of an old favorite,

"Thanks a Million."

♪ [ Big Band ]

[ Tom ]
Who is it?
It's me, Mrs. Riley.

Are you alone?
Yes, dear.

Come in.
I made your breakfast
myself.

Never mind about that.
Did you get those papers?
Here they are.

Mr. Tyler,

I hope you'll disregard
that foolish note
I sent you...

about last month's rent.

I should have realized
your head was up
in the clouds...

and you had no time
for sordid and mundane things.

Ah.

[ Groans ]
Something wrong,
Mr. Tyler?

Everything's wrong.
Aw, it can't be that bad,
Mr. Tyler.

A little tiff,
a lover's spat.

I always say
the course of true love
never runs smoothly.

A little sun
and a little shade
makes the fairest day.

Get out of here!
Why, Mr. Tyler.

Get out!
Mr. Tyler.

Get out of here right now.
It's a good thing you've
got a million dollars.

Get out!

Mr. Tyler! Only $1,500,
and it's yours.

Take it away!
I'm not interested.
But you don't understand.

- It works.
- Oh.

[ Chattering ]

Hi, Findlay.
Hello, Findlay.

Well?
[ Scoffs ]

But this is crazy.
Look, you've got to
explain to him.

Tell him that I--
I can't. You know Duffy.
He won't listen. Beer, Joe.

Yes, sir.
How's it going,
Cinderella Man?

You don't happen
to have a couple of grand
in small bills on you.

Lay off, Eddie.
Duffy's fired him.

So he's
an unemployed millionaire.
My heart bleeds.

Joe, a round of drinks
on Mr. Farley.

Wait a minute.
I'm not married to--
Have a fight already?

How can you argue
with a million bucks?

Maybe he doesn't
want to get measured
for his polo mallet.

Here's mud on your spats.
Why don't you two guys
mind your own--

Take your tired jokes
back to the bar.

Listen, Tom.
Why don't you go home?

If Sara's there, maybe
she'll convince you too.

Well, anyway, go home.
If Duffy comes in here,
there's gonna be trouble.

No, I can't go home.
The hall's full of guys
trying to sell me things.

Real estate, insurance,
perpetual motion machines,
yachts.

How can I prove
I'm not married to that dame?
How would you prove it?

Oh, I'm married already.
My wife hasn't got a yacht
to her name.

Jess, will you marry me?

What?
I said,
will you marry me?

It'll prove it.
Don't you see?

I'm not going to marry you
just to prove that you're
not married to her.

All your life
you've been railing against
her kind of woman--

useless, troublemakers,
parasites.

You're not gonna let her
get away with this, are you?
Well, I don't--

See it my way. We can go
right down to city hall.
Hey, what is this?

Please, Jess.
Let's go.

I'll tell Duffy.
You phone from the city hall.
I'll call you from down there.

Cinderella Man weds.
Wait till Sara
hears about this.

Can I ride down with you?

Hello? I want to speak
to Miss Sara Farley.
Johnson of the Courier.

Oh. Well, just tell her
her husband's getting married.

That's what I said.
He just went down
to the city hall.

Look, I don't know what kind
of license you fellows want,
but this ain't the place for it.

What's keeping
the clerk?

Probably can't
read your signature
on the application.

Thomas Jefferson Tyler
and Jessica Wood?
Yes.

Mr. Conovan, the chief clerk,
would like to see you in his
office. Right this way.

Excuse me.

What's up?
Chief clerk
don't confide in me.

You can't go in there.

What's Conovan want?
Give us a break.

You Thomas Jefferson Tyler,
Jessica Woods?

[ Both ] Yes.
These the two that applied
for the license, Fisher?

Yes, sir.
What's this all about?

You may not know it,
Miss Woods, but this man
already has a wife.

I have not.
He's marrying me.

He's married to Sara Farley.
Here it is all over
the front page.

I'm not married to anybody,
and I insist that you
give me a license.

I can't be a party
to a conspiracy
to commit bigamy.

You got any proof
that you're not married
to Sara Farley?

Well, you know
no one can prove that
they're not married.

Nobody issues certificates
of non-marriage.

You gotta take my word for it.
I'm not married to Sara Farley.

Tom-Tom!

How can you say that?

We had a little quarrel.
I'm sorry, darling,
and I forgive you.

You forgive me?
Now you cut this out.
This is--

This must be so awkward
for you, my dear.

I'm terribly sorry,
but Tom-Tom is married
to me and--

When were we married?
Have you forgotten already?

Where were we married?

You shouldn't do this to me,
and on our honeymoon, too, just
because you're angry with me.

It's so embarrassing.
[ Shouts ]
Where were we married?

Don't shout, dear.
We shouldn't air
our quarrels in public.

She's lying! I'm not married to
Miss Farley! Give me a license
to marry Miss Woods!

Stop shouting at me.
You ought to be ashamed,
pulling such a scurvy trick.

You're here to serve the public.
I'm one of the public.
I insist on my rights!

Let go! Take him out.
You're denying me
my rights by force.

That man is setting up
a moral censorship,

when all he was ever
commissioned to do was to
grant licenses to citizens!

[ Door Slams ]

I just don't
understand it, Jess.

I'm absolutely innocent,
and I lost my job,
can't go home.

I can't even get married.
No civil rights.

I'm like a man
without a country.

Also, I'm hungry.

Let's have dinner
at my place.
Have any money?

I think I spent it all
on taxi fare.

We have four dollars.
Come on.
Oh, fine.

Jess! This is
a Farley store.

Look.
There's the caviar.

Come on. Here.
Give me a hand
with these.

Take these, huh?
Tom, we only have
four dollars.

Never mind about the money.
I'm married to a rich woman.

Come on.
Bring your basket along here.
Wait. We'll get another one.

Tom, you'll never
get away with this.
Huh? Sure I will.

We can't possibly
eat all this stuff.

Never mind.
We'll put it away
someplace.

Thank you very much.

3.65.
Where do you keep
the champagne?

- No champagne, sir.
- No champagne?

5.75.
A low type of store.

Probably
have boll weevils
in the flour.

5.11.
Oh, no, sir. 6.85.

Oh, you can stop
that counting.
That isn't necessary.

Thirty, 40. Oh, yes, sir.
I have to. 9.40.

10.35.
You don't think I'm gonna
pay for this, do you?

I own this stuff.

13.80. Mr. Bissell!

Ninety-five.
Mr. Bissell!

Yes?
[ Muttering ]

This man doesn't want
to pay. 19.45.

I mean he-- 21.45.

Sir, let's have no trifling
with the clerks,
if you please.

19.45.
Perhaps you
don't know who I am.

Here.
Take a look at that.
21.45.

Mr. Farley!
I-I mean, Mr. Tyler.

Well, well.
This is an honor!

To be chosen out of all
the Farley stores!

I'm so pleased,
Miss Farley.
I'm not Miss Farley.

- This is Miss Woods,
my fiancée.
- How do you do?

Your fiancée?
But-- But you're--

- My wife is very broad-minded.
- Five.

52.30.
Stop counting!

Now I've lost count.

Never mind.
I hope--

I mean, well,
congratulations.
Thank you.

Pick up a couple of bags,
Jessica dear,
and let's go home to dinner.

There we are.
Good night. Thank you.

I don't know
what we're going to do
with all this stuff.

You can give it away
if you like. There's plenty
more where this came from.

We could start
another grocery store.
This has great possibilities.

Jessica? This has even
greater possibilities.

Like what?
Can--

Not so fast--
Oh, sonny?

Huh?
Here. Is that
your sister?

Uh-huh.
Well, you take that home
to Mother now.

Gee. Thanks!
Oh, thanks.

I won't be home
to dinner, dear.
Where are you going?

I'm going to call
on my wife.

[ Doorbell Buzzes ]

Yes?
Oh, hello.
Is Mrs. Tyler in?

Who, sir?
I'm Mr. Tyler,
Miss Farley's husband.

Oh, yes, sir.
Won't you please come in?

Miss Sara--
I mean, Mrs. Tyler didn't
tell me you were coming.

My congratulations, sir.
Thank you.

I'm Barret, sir.
Oh, thank you, Barret.
Is she in?

No, sir. She's out
for the evening.
Oh.

Well, I'll see her later.
Do you have a spare room
for me?

Oh, certainly, sir.
Adjoining Miss--

Adjoining
Mrs. Tyler, sir.
Oh.

This way, please.

May I say, sir,
that the staff was delighted
with your articles?

You liked them?
I saw right
through them, sir.

Hmm?
I even predicted
the marriage, sir.

Won $180 from the staff.
Well, have they
paid off yet?

They will at the end
of the month, sir.
It was child's play.

I recognized it
immediately, sir.

A kind of
left-handed romance,

the devastating criticism
of a man in love.

That's a nice deduction.
Rather obvious,
if I may say so, sir.

The writer of those articles
was trying to avoid
showing his affection.

Do you happen to know
where she went, Barret?

She's dining
at the Whitsons'.

The where?
The Whitsons', sir.

The Whitsons'?
Yes, sir.

This one, sir.

Miss Sara's parents
left Mr. Whitson in charge
of the Farley chain.

Frankly, sir, he doesn't
know his wholesale
from his retail.

Barret?
Yes, sir?

Get me a cab.

Yes, sir.

[ Doorbell Buzzing ]
♪ [ Orchestral ]

This the Whitson
residence?
Yes, sir.

Is Miss Sara Farley here?
Who shall I say's
calling, sir?

Mr. Tom-Tom Tyler,
the Cinderella Man.

I'm Miss Farley's
husband.

[ Door Closes ]
Darling.

Mr. Tom-Tom Tyler.

It's your last chance
to call it off.
No.

You'll have to excuse us.
We're still on our honeymoon.

Well, dear, you might
at least introduce me.

Oh. This is Mrs. Whitson,
our hostess.

Oh, Mrs. Whitson.
How do you do?

I understood you were
too ill to accept tonight,
Mr. Tyler.

Oh, he is.
He's going right home,
aren't you, dear?

Well, I should say not.
I feel wonderful.

My husband, Mr. Tyler.
Oh, how do you do,
Mr. Whitson?

How do you do?
Oop!

First one I've missed
in years.

Mr. and Mrs. Vickers.
How do you do,
Mrs. Vickers?

How do you do?
Mr. Vickers.

How do you do?
And my favorite auntie.
Hello.

Is it true that you've
given up newspaper work?
Yes, dear.

I'm going in
for pigeon hunting.

Miss Clayton.
Oh, Miss Clayton,
how do you do?

Mr. Sharpe.
How do you do?

Mr. Sharpe.
Oh, and Count
André de Guyon.

Why, André, how are you?
Good evening.

Mrs. Whitson,
this sounds like
a wonderful party.

I always have wanted
to mingle with
the filthy rich.

But you know, I can't afford
one of those monkey suits,

and Sara hasn't bought me
my trousseau yet.

Darling, you look feverish.
I really don't think
you should stay.

Oh, no. I feel like
a million dollars.

A million dol--
That's pretty good, huh?
The old bean's working fine.

Ah, there.
Thank you very mu-- Oh.

Get out of here.

Not unless you holler "uncle"
and make a public statement
that we're not married.

Not on your life.
Oh!

Oh.

No. No, thanks.
I'll stick with
my peanuts.

Goobers, they call 'em
where I come from.
[ Shell Cracks ]

And where is that,
Mr. Tyler?

Oh, the hills
of West Virginny.
God's own country.

Yep, I grew up there
as a barefoot boy with nothin'
more than a green thumb...

and a natural talent
for making an eight
the hard way.

But I did all right.
I got Sara. Ow!

His foot just happened
to fit the glass slipper.

You know, it's funny.
Ma always used to say,
"Marry a rich girl."

"Feather your nest,"
she said. "It can't hurt."

She was right.
Guess she must still
be watching over me.

Has your mother
passed on, Mr. Tyler?
Oh, no, no, no.

She's still up there
in the cabin on the mountain.

"The old widdy
of Mount Baldy"
they call her.

Why, she's about 70 now.
Frail and white-haired.

Yep, I can see her
there now,

smoking that old corncob pipe
that Dad left her.

Yes, indeed.
You know, Sara?

We'll have her come
and live with us.
She's a wonderful gal.

Why, she chews tobacco
just like Dad, only better.

She can drown
a beetle at 20 paces.
Oh, she's-- You'll love her.

Yes, from the stories
Tom tells me,

Mother Tyler is terribly
quite an independent.
Mm-hmm.

Tell them about the time
she shot the government agent.
Uh--

Oh, well, you don't
have to hide anything here.
We have tax trouble too.

Or do you think it would
be carrying things too far?

Why, no, no. You mean about
the time that the revenuers
surrounded the still,

and Ma came out with the--
Yes, that was the time.

Why, sure. Now come on.
You get over there, pretend
that you're the agent--

Oh, no. Why don't you
let Mrs. Vickers
be the agent?

Well, if you insist.
Uh--
Why--

Oh!
Whoops!
We busted our beads.

Well, don't worry about that.
There's plenty more
where those came from.

I never could resist these
stories, 'cause I'm mighty proud
of my family's doings.

Oh. Now, Mrs. V., if you'll
just step right over here...

and pretend like you're one
of those government varmints
hiding behind an old pine tree.

He'd have to pick a big one
just like you would.
Why--

That's all right.
Just step right back here.
That's fine. You stay there.

Ma was down by the cabin,
standing guard with
her squirrel gun.

Oh.

Ma was quite a shot,
when she was sober.

Well, Uncle Porter--
He's my half-wit uncle
with the hives.

Uncle Porter was heating up
the mash and starting in to
sweat out about a 40 gallon...

of the prettiest mountain dew
that ever invited snakes
to a picnic.

Well, Ma suddenly spies
that government varmint.

His treasury pallor
give him away.

So she throws
a sight on him and--

Hey. Hey!
[ Door Opens ]

[ Tires Screech ]

Not tonight, dear.
Good night.

- Well, it's about time.
- How did you get in here?

Where have you been
since your rude exit
from the Whitsons'?

I was at the Stork Club
with André.
The Stork Club. A fine thing.

Get out of here right now!
Shh! [ Whispers ]
Remember the servants.

What are you doing here?
I've been waiting
for you for hours.

I made some sandwiches,
I brought you some milk,
and then I waited some more.

How did I know you weren't
killed or something?
You worried about me.

Well, if you'd been killed,
I'd never been able to prove
I wasn't married to you.

[ Scoffs ]

Now will you go home?
Oh, but I am home.
I live here.

I'm Mr. Farley,
or you're Mrs. Tyler.
Remember?

Oh, a fine wife you are.

Still a bride and already
you're out with another man.

Oh!

Tsk, tsk, tsk.
You gonna marry
this De Guyon?

That's none
of your business.

Mm-mmm. No answer.
I gave all the servants
the night off.

- You gave them the night off?
- Sure. I'm the new man
of the house.

Oh, I'll--
I'll call the police!
Good!

Tell 'em I'm not your husband,
please.

Don't let me go through life
with that blot on my record.

You may as well get
this straight. You're not
going to get out of this.

I'm going to devote my life
to making you miserable--

especially after what you did
at the Whitsons' tonight.

Why, I just showed pride
in my family.

Have a goober?

You're going to get out
of here if I have to
throw you out myself!

Wrong build.
Nice, but wrong for the job.

Why don't you try slugging me
with a few old diamonds?

Hey! Hey, no, no! Hey!

Hey, look out! Hey, look out
there! Hey, put those down.
Wait a minute!

Have you gone crazy?

Look-- I--
[ Indistinct ]
Let me go!

Now you listen to me. I lost
my job, my friends hoot at me,
[ Muffled Shouts ]

my girl feels foolish,
and you get playful.

Ow! Now listen.

You just listen
to me for a minute,
and then I'll let you talk.

Okay? Did you hear me?
[ Muffled Shout ]

All right.
Now, first of all--

I smell like
the Rose Parade.
That's your opinion.

Let's stop being silly
and get serious.
Oh, certainly.

When you get hurt
it's serious.

Now, my attorneys happen
to have checked on you,

and you haven't learned
to make an eight the hard way.

You're a fair writer,
but you're unscrupulous.

And you're a wolf.
That's a lie.

Stella, Joan, Lucy,
Martha, Tillie, Patsy,
Lucille-- Deedee?

Poppy, Vera,
Nancy and Jessica--

a round dozen.

I see you like
the athletic type too.

Deedee-- a pitcher
on a girls' baseball team.

Probably had
quite a windup.

And Tillie, professionally
known as the Titillating
Twister from Tennessee.

You gave her a fox scarf
and then took it back.
She gave it back.

Oh, yes.
She decided you
weren't steady enough.

No sense
of responsibility.

A gangster's moll too.

Don't remember Patsy?

You had to go into hiding
until her boyfriend
got caught, remember?

Yeah, well, I--
I was just after a story.

Anyhow, she was
in hiding with me.
Don't brag.

Two F.B.I. men
were with you.

According to the record,
you're much worse than I am.

So where do you get
the right to criticize
me in print?

Okay. You through?
Not with you.

You're going to be mud in
the public eye until I change
my mind, Cinderella Man.

You sure?
Mm-hmm.

Positive?
Mm-hmm.

Okay, darling.
I give in.

I surrender.
I'm your husband.

Put out the cat, dear,
and let's turn off
the lights.

Well, what are you
so surprised about?
I'm still your husband.

Now wait a minute.
Come to your Tom-Tom.

Go away!

You maniac!
But I love you, dear,
as I have a legal right to do.

Go away! Stop it!
Do you want this marriage
to be a farce,

a travesty
on conjugal bliss?

Didn't you promise
to love and cherish me?
Well?

All right, all right.
You win.

A signed statement that I'm
not married to you, hmm?
All right.

I'll sign it in the morning.
Now go home.
Oh, no.

We're going right down to
the Chronicle office now.

- There's plenty of time
for the late edition.
- But I've got to see my lawyer.

- I can't sign anything.
- Now!

All right.
And this better not
be a gag, darling.

Hello? Hello, Duffy?

Listen, I'm bringing
Sara Farley right down
to the Chronicle office.

Yeah. Meet me there. You'll get
her signed statement and a story
to top all Farley stories!

What are you
in a huff about?
I'm the injured party.

After all, other reporters
wrote things about you too.
Why pick on me?

Because you pried into my
personal life, wormed your
way into my confidence...

and then twisted
everything I said.

Well, it was--
it was my job.

Well, I'm still hungry.

It just occurred to me
I could've used
a sandwich myself.

And there's a lunchroom
up ahead.

They say truck drivers
always find the places
that serve good food.

[ Brakes Squeal ]

♪ [ Big Band ]

You know, in a way,
this has sort of been fun.

Well, shall we--
shall we go?
Mmm, no.

Mmm, I mean,
down to the paper.

I understood you.
I said no.

We've got to get there before
the deadline. Duffy'll be
waiting for us.
No!

Sara, you're not going
to start this all over again.
[ Loudly ] I'm not going.

Shh!
Don't shush me.

Sara, please.
I've changed my mind.

Fine thing.
Every time I eat,
you get richer.

Come on.
Let go of me,
you monster.

Oh, no--
Don't you dare
hit me!

Why not?
You're my wife.
What's up, bud?

It's just a little
family argument.
She's my wife.

I am not!
What?

Repeat that-- louder.
Listen, you're a witness.

Are you going to stand
there and let him hit me?
Nope.

They're married, Herman.
It's legal. Don't mix in.

Who's mixin'?

[ Sniffing ]
You smell nice!

What you got on?
I'll get some for my wife.
[ Men Sniffing ]

Oh--

Oh, Sara, now--

Herman, I'm chairman
of the local, ain't I?

I said
we don't mix in.
Just a minute.

You keep out of this.
I got a right to disagree,
don't I? What about the bylaws?

Gentlemen, please.
Let's take a vote.

What's the resolution?
Do we got a right to mix
in another union's troubles?

That's the resolution.
Get me
the sheriff's office.

- Please, gentlemen--
- Excuse us, lady. It's illegal
to influence the voting.

Two-thirds vote
or simple majority?
Majority.

I'd like some discussion
on this subject--
point of information.

Now, gentlemen, just a minute.
He's calling you a gentleman,
so answer him, stupid.

Are you a member of
the Truck Drivers Local?

Well, I-- No.
Well, then shut up!

Oh, Sara!
Wait a minute.
We ain't even voted yet.

No, but she's going!
Wait a minute.
You started this.

Now you can wait
till we count the votes.
[ Car Engine Starts ]

[ Arguing, Indistinct ]

[ Crashing ]

You shouldn't have
done it, Herman.
He was out of order, wasn't he?

Well, you should have
appealed to the chair.
Oh, you brute!

Now, lady,
is that parliamentary?
I warned you, Herman.

It's purely jurisdictional,
just like you said.
Oh.

[ Siren Wailing ]
Tom!
You would have a glass jaw.

Tom. Wake up.

Wake up!
What's the matter with you?

[ Sputters ]

[ Coughing ]

[ Man ]
I won't be long.

Come on. Get up there.
Here comes His Honor.

Can't see why they
have to get you up
at all hours, Homer.

Gotta do my duty, Martha.
A regular crime wave
we've been having.

[ Clears Throat ]
Court's in session.
What's the charge, Sheriff?

Disturbing the peace,
rioting, drunk and disorderly
and assault.

But this is ridiculous.
That'll be five dollars
or five days.

But it isn't true.
I was merely trying--
Now it's $10 or 10 days.

- But I have a right
to see a lawyer.
- Now it's $20 or 20 days.

If you want to make it more,
just keep on talkin'.

But you can't do
this to her, Judge.
Don't you know who she is?

Don't know and I don't care.
Now it's $30 or 30 days.

But this is Sara Farley,
the grocery store heiress.
Sixty.

She'll take
this courthouse, and--
Oh, Tom, stop it, please.

I'll pay.
How much is it?

Sixty dollars,
like the judge said.

Well, I haven't any money
with me, but if you'll
let me use the phone--

Lock her up, Dan.
[ Laughing ]

What's so funny?
I was just thinking about
you and your millions.

I shouldn't think you'd laugh.
Now I can't make that statement
to your editor.

It's too late for the morning
papers, but I'll bail you out
tomorrow in time to sign it.

- Why, you--
- None of that now. Come along.

Take her away, Sheriff.
Good night, Your Honor.

- Thank you for restoring
my faith in human nature.
- Wait a minute.

Come here, boy.

Who? Me?

[ Laughing ]

[ Snoring ]

[ Snorting,
Groaning ]

♪ Oh, give me land
lots of land ♪

♪ Neath the starry
skies above ♪

♪ Don't fence me in
Let me ride-- ♪
Shut up!

Why, Tom.
Don't you like my singing?

I am trying to sleep.

On our honeymoon?

[ Snoring Continues ]

[ Sighs ]

- Tom?
- What?

I'm cold.
If I could get at you,
I'd warm you up but good.

Darling, you have got
a terrible disposition,
haven't you?

I'll, uh, tell you
what I'll do.

I'll give you
my coat.
Well!

Don't tell me
under that rude exterior
lurks the soul of a gentleman.

That's not all
that lurks there.

Thanks, pal.
You're welcome.

You know, it could be
a lot worse. Suppose we
were really married.

Huh-uh. My imagination
doesn't carry that far.

A lot of girls would be
very glad to marry me.

Well, I suppose
if a girl kept
the keyholes plugged up...

and looked under her pillow
for microphones every night--
You get this straight.

This is the first time
in my life I ever took
an assignment like that.

Why'd you take it then?

Well, I, uh-- I like to ski,
and I saw a chance...

to get a vacation at Sun Valley
on-- on the paper.

Don't you ever do
anything honestly?

I did once.
Never again.
When?

You remember
that article you read
in the cabin up there?

Oh, yes-- the bait for
your filthy little trap.

Well, I admit
that's why I wrote it.

But, uh, funny part of it is
that I turned it in to Duffy
just the way you read it.

You're lying.

No! Ask Duffy.

Listen, I'm not proud of it.
No man likes it to get around
that he's soft in the head.

He'd probably have fired me
for it anyhow even if you
hadn't given out that story.

And he'd have been right.
A reporter's supposed to
dish out facts, not moonshine.

You shouldn't be so
self-critical, darling.

You should leave that
to your wife.
My wife?

I've always wanted to be
someone's severest critic.

Listen, you're not going back on
your promise. You're gonna sign
that statement tomorrow.

How can I? Thanks to you,
I'm stuck here for 60 days.

You won't get out of it
that easily.

That lunatic of a judge
will have to let us use
the phone in the morning.

Then you can call
that gigolo of yours.

Better yet,
I could call the press.
Can't you see the headlines?

"Tom-Tom and heiress honeymoon
in jail. Lovers' tiff lands
glamour couple in the clink."

You wouldn't.
Oh, wouldn't I?

Apparently your education
hasn't been completed yet.

[ Groans ]

[ Whistling ]

Could I have a cigarette,
Tom?

It's the last one.
Oh, one puff then.
Please.

Well, you don't
deserve it, but here.

Ah-ah!
I'll hold it.

I can't reach it there,
Tom.

[ Groans ]
Here.

Is that better?
Perfect.

Oww! Oh, you
cannibalistic little--
Give me back my cigarette!

Give me that cigarette,
do you hear?
♪ Give me land, lots of land ♪

♪ Neath the starry skies above ♪
Give me back
that cigarette right--

- ♪ Don't fence me in ♪
- Oh, I should have known better
than to trust you!

Give me that cigarette!
♪ Let me ride through the wide
open country that I love ♪

♪ Don't fence me in ♪
Give me that cigarette
right now!

♪ [ Scatting ]
I should've--
[ Shouts ] Judge!

Judge!

Cut out that racket!
What's going on in here?

What's all this noise about?
Just wait'll I get
my hands on you!

She bit me, Judge.
She bit you?

How in the world
could she--

I don't know
how you done it,
but don't do it again.

Ten, 20, 30,

40, 50, 60.

There you are, Your Honor.
Is that correct?
Yep.

And, uh, here's
$20 for you personally.
Uh--

Are you trying
to bribe me?
Oh, no, Your Honor.

Attempted bribery.
I fine you $20.

Well,
it's not my money.
Let's go.

[ Man ]
Well, time's a-wasting, boys.
[ Chattering ]

Right there.

Thank you.
Now don't crowd around,
fellas.

Darling, what
a terrible experience.

It wasn't so bad. It reminded
me a little of your château,
especially the plumbing.

How about a statement?
Is it true that you and Tom-Tom
have had a fight?

We had a little disagreement.
I'm sure you wouldn't want
to pry into the reasons for it.

But Tom-Tom has apologized.
[ Men Exclaiming ]

And now you can say
we're very, very happy.

[ Chattering ]
What have you
got to say?

[ Tom ]
No comment.
Judge, how much is his bail?

Sixty dollars.
Pay it, André.

[ Man #1 ] She's going to bail
you out.
[ Man #2 ] I wish
I had a rich wife.

No, she's not gonna
pay my bail.
[ Sara ] Why, Tom-Tom.

I'll stay right here in jail.
You meet a better class
of people.

[ Man #1 ] That's tellin' 'em.
[ Man #2 ]
How about a statement?

You want a quote from me?
Okay then, take this.

Rather than accept
one nickel of
her tainted money,

I'll rot here in jail
for the rest of my life.

[ Man #1 ] That's tellin' 'em.
[ Man #2 ]
Hold it. Hold it.

My poor darling.

In all my experience,
I have never met
a more frightful cad.

Imagine turning down
your generous offer.
Can't you imagine it, André?

Of course not. If the man
were a gentleman--
He'd have accepted my money.

Yes, as a matter
of simple courtesy.

It's the first time
anyone ever insulted me
by turning down my money.

Well, it just shows
how far he'll go to
demonstrate his hatred.

Hatred?

Do you think he
really hates me, André?

Well, naturally.
You want him to hate you,
don't you?

Yes.
Yes, of course.

You can't really blame him.
You've made him a national
laughingstock.

You're right, André.

But now I--

now I think it's time
to deny the story.

As you say,
I've accomplished everything
I set out to.

A very wise decision,
my dear.

After all, you can't
go on pretending that
you're married to him...

and then marry
someone else--

someone who really
has something
in common with you.

[ Tom ] That's why I didn't
show up with her. I got knocked
out and thrown into jail.

Every paper in town
beat us to it again.
But I couldn't call you.

I was locked up.
[ Intercom Buzzes ]

Yes?
[ Woman ]
Mr. Ketchell is here.

Ask him to wait.
I've got a way out
of this.

I'm gonna prove
I'm not married to her.

I'm leaving town this afternoon.
I'm going up to Maine
or Canada or someplace,

and I'm really
going to get married.

Let Sara Farley
charge me with bigamy.
Married? Whom are you marrying?

Jessica, of course.
We'll come back with
this whole thing licked.

That Farley dame
will just look silly.
I'll keep in touch with you.

After the ceremony
just let me write the story.

Jessica, eh? That's rather
drastic, isn't it? I mean,
rushing into marriage just--

[ Fingers Snap ]
There might be another way
out of this.

[ Intercom Clicks ]
Send Ketchell in here.

There's the man
to help us.
Ketchell? How?

He's a lawyer.
Well, what of it?

We can sue Sara Farley
and have the facts established
in a court of law.

No, you're not
getting me in any deeper.
I've had enough of this.

Tyler, you've made this
newspaper a laughingstock.
Newsboys sneer at me as I go by.

Why? Because every paper in town
beat us on our own yarn.
They did not. It's not true.

I'm not married to Sara Farley.
That's what you say.
But can you prove it?

No.
No. Now, you're
responsible for this.

You can repay me
in some small measure
for what you've done to me.

Come on in.
If I marry Jess--

We can not only prove we were
right and they fell for a gag,
we can get an exclusive story,

because you'll be the plaintiff,
and you'll be covering
the story for us.

Who are we
suing this morning?
Sara Farley.

Why? Won't she
give him his allowance?
Oh, very funny. Huh!

Sara claims she's Tyler's wife,
and Tyler's suing for libel.

Do you mean to imply, sir,
that this beautiful specimen
of American womanhood,

this veritable flower
of ravishing femininity
who represents--

How much?
A hundred million?

Merely claims that she's
married to you, and you
want to sue her for libel?

Don't make a campaign speech out
of it. Now, you can sue for
defamation of character,

damage to his reputation
and livelihood,

holding him up
to public ridicule
and great mental anguish.

How does it strike you?
I don't know.

Why don't you sue for divorce
and get a fat settlement?
Because I'm not married to her.

Can we win?
Well, if he's telling
the truth we can.

He's been damaged, all right--
damaged to the tune
of a million dollars.

I don't care about the money.
Just get me out of that mess.

We'll save our face,
and we'll get an exclusive
on a great story.

File suit right away.
Draw up the papers.

This gets you out
of the nutcracker.
Maybe--
and maybe it'll be worse.

More headlines about me.
That's not getting me out.

A legal decision
will be better than this,
won't it?

I'd like to see
Thomas Tyler, please.

Name?
Sara Farley.

Freddie.

Miss Sara Farley
to see Mr. Tyler.

Oh, right this way,
Miss Farley.

Just a minute, Freddie.
I'll take care of this.

What are you doing here?
You making a career
out of hounding me?

I just came to give
your editor the statement.
You're gonna get the surprise--

What?
I'll sign
the statement.

You mean it?
It's no gag?

What made you
change your mind?
Oh, a lot of things.

Your glass jaw,
and your gallantry in giving me
your coat last night,

and-- and sharing
your last cigarette with me,

and-- and it suddenly stopped
being fun, Tom.

I don't want you thinking
I'm hard and vindictive,
because,

well, I wouldn't want
anyone to think that.

Oh, I knew
I was right about you.
That's what I told Duffy.

That isn't what you wrote.
No, but he didn't have a chance
to run the last installment.

That was the only one that
was legitimate, on the level
and flattering too.

Oh, what a relief this is.
You're a great girl, Sara.

Duffy won't believe this,
but I told him.

I said you weren't the girl
that we started to write about.
I knew you'd come through.

Sit down over here.
I'll see if he's in his office
and break the good news to him.

Don't go away.
Oh, I could kiss you for this.

In fact, I think I will.

[ Laughs ]

Miss Sara Farley?
Yes.

Thank you.

♪ [ Whistling ]

Duffy, look at this stuff.

Everything was going fine till
you hit her with that summons.
Just bad timing, that's all.

Anyway, we've tried to explain,
we've tried to apologize,
and she wouldn't listen.

Now she'll get
what's coming to her.
She'll get what's coming to her?

Maybe you don't know
what's happening.

This morning an old lady hit me
over the head with an umbrella.
What for?

She said she was
doing it in the name
of American womanhood.

Go on! Are you afraid
of a few women?

[ Woman ]
There he is!

[ Chattering, Shouting ]

And now, Mr.Tyler, I am certain
that you will agree that...

you could hardly have forgotten
such an important event
as your marriage, could you?

You have a good memory?
I have a very good memory,
Mr. Prosecutor.

As a matter of fact, I recall
that you asked me that same
question about 20 minutes ago.

I am not a prosecutor,
Mr. Tyler.

I am the legal counsel
for the defendant,
which you very well know.

The plaintiff will refrain
from further sarcasm.
Proceed with the examination.

You remember everything
that happened at Sun Valley,
for instance?

Yes.
Do you remember
falling off a dogsled...

and being knocked
unconscious?
Yes.

Memory doesn't function
during an unconscious period,
does it, Mr. Tyler?

I mean, if you were
unconscious, you couldn't
very well remember...

what happened
while you were unconscious,
could you?

- Nothing happened
while I was unconscious.
- How do you know?

Well, I--
Nothing happened.

[ Counsel ]
Isn't it possible that while
you were in this condition...

you might have done
quite a number of things
you don't remember?

I remember everything.
Isn't it possible that
after the accident in the sled,

you visited the local
justice of the peace?

No, it is not possible.
I've just told you
I remember everything.

I resent your attempts
to make me appear an idiot.

Your Honor, do I have
to stand for this?

The matter of who is
or who is not an idiot has not
been brought into this action.

The witness will answer
the questions.

[ Counsel ]
By the way, Mr. Tyler,

while you were serving
as a war correspondent,

were you ever wounded
or injured in any way?

Yes, but I assume
that's no crime.

Seriously enough
to be hospitalized?
Yes.

Would you tell the court
what was the nature
of your injury?

I was struck on the head
by shell fragments.

Which resulted in
a loss of memory?
Yes, but it was only temporary.

Objection.
This line of questioning
is irrelevant and immaterial.

It seems to me that
whether or not the plaintiff
had a good memory...

has a great deal
of bearing on this case.

- The objection is overruled.
- Thank you, Your Honor.

And now, Mr. Tyler,
according to your deposition,

it is your contention that
you are the helpless victim
of a diabolical plot...

on the part of the defendant.
That is definitely
my contention.

It is the whim of this
evil and designing woman
to wreck your life?

That's exactly what
she's trying to do.

Isn't it just the other
way around, Mr. Tyler?

Didn't you lure this
young woman to a cabin
in Sun Valley?

I did not lure her.
Well, did she
invite you there?

- No, but--
- Then how did it happen
you were there with her?

- Well, I wanted to be
alone with her--
- Ah, you did?

You wanted to be alone
with her in the seclusion
of a cabin in the woods...

where you subsequently--
You're putting
the wrong connotation on this.

[ Counsel ] Well, what other
connotation could be placed
upon it, Mr. Tyler?

The truth! You're making it
appear as though I had
a personal interest,

whereas I was only collecting
material for my articles,
nothing else.

Now, Mr. Tyler,
I ask you to look
at the defendant.

In your articles,
you described her
rather flatteringly.

Do you still agree
that she has charm?

I do.
She's young
and desirable.

- Yes, she is.
- Then she'd naturally attract
the attention of most men.

I suppose she might.
And yet you maintain that while
you were collecting material...

for your articles,
the defendant was so overcome
by your manly charms,

your magnetic personality
and beauty,

that without any encouragement
from you, she dreamed up
a fraudulent marriage to you...

and threw
her considerable fortune
at your feet.

[ Spectators Murmuring ]

[ Counsel ]
And although you had
never seen him before,

you permitted him
to enter the house because
he said he was her husband?

Yes, sir.
I gave him the room
adjoining hers.

I was always put
in the guesthouse.

Was he still there
when she returned?
I don't know, sir.

He gave me the night off.
He assumed the rights
of the man of the house?

Yes, sir.
Was he still there on
the following morning...

when you brought up your
mistress's breakfast to her?
No, sir.

But there were
signs of a struggle
or some unpleasantness, sir.

Huh? What signs?

Broken perfume bottles, sir.

Did it look as if she
had defended herself
against violence?

Objection. Presumption
on part of the witness
and leading question.

- I know where it's leading.
- So do I, counselor.

Objection sustained.

[ Murmurings ]

And the plaintiff
charged these purchases
to the Farley account?

Sixty-seven dollars
and eighty-four cents,
we estimate.

And you permitted
him to charge
such a large amount?

Well, he said
he was her husband.

Of course,
I thought it was very odd.
What was odd?

Well, he said he was
married to Miss Farley.

Then he pointed
to that woman there...

and introduced her
as his fiancée.

[ Murmurings ]

[ Counsel ]
Having heard the accusations
of the plaintiff, Mrs. Tyler,

would you be kind
enough to tell the jury
your reaction to them?

Oh, I forgive him.
He doesn't really mean it.

She forgives me?

I think you deserve
a lot of credit for
your forbearance, Mrs. Tyler.

Now, Mrs. Tyler--
Objection. Defense counsel
constantly addresses...

the witness as Mrs. Tyler
to influence the jury.

But she is Mrs. Tyler.
We dispute that.

We're here to prove that
she's not Mrs. Tyler.

Sustained. It'll be
stricken from the record.

Perhaps you may address
the witness as, uh, Sara?

Yes.

Sara.

Now, Sara, you met Mr. Tyler
at Sun Valley?
Yes.

Can you tell us
what happened
at Sun Valley?

Oh, it was just wonderful,
because we fell in love.
[ Fingers Snap ]

- Just like that.
- Just like that, eh?

Now, Sara, ordinarily
a woman has too much pride
to contest a lawsuit like this.

Will you please tell the jury
why you're contesting?

Well, because I know
he loves me.

After all, he came to the
Whitson dinner party because
he couldn't keep away from me.

And if he had no emotional
interest in me, he wouldn't
have wanted to... strike me.

That's why he broke
into the house
at 3:00 in the morning.

A woman knows
about those things.

He was so jealous
of the Count de Guyon.

But even though he was
in a jealous rage
he was so sweet.

He went down to the kitchen
and got sandwiches and milk.

Well, I was hungry.

Of course, he hates rich people.
He blames me for having money.

He does?

He's the only man I've ever met
who really isn't interested
in my money.

A man often reveals things
without knowing it.

I guess we both fell in love
before we knew it.

[ Counsel ] Well, Sara,
if he isn't interested in money,
and he loves you,

why do you think
he's suing you?

Well, sometimes...
he's a heel.

I object, Your Honor.
[ Judge ]
Sustained.

Question led to an opinion
on the part of the witness,
and was so designed.

However, it has become
increasingly clear...

that there are rather
unusual factors behind
the testimony so far given.

The court cannot
disregard certain
emotional implications...

which apparently have
remained undetected
by opposing counsel.

Therefore, I shall ask both
litigants and their attorneys
to meet with me in my chambers.

Meanwhile-- [ Clears Throat ]
the court will recess.

[ Murmurings ]

Uh, will you be seated,
please?

Be seated, please.

It's not in the province
of the court to interfere
in libel actions,

but this action basically
is one of domestic origin,

deriving from the marriage
or non-marriage
of the litigants.

Now, it's always been my policy
to attempt reconciliations
in the public interest,

and because
I'm just an old meddler
with a sentimental streak.

Now, everyone in the courtroom,
including the jury...

is fully aware that you two
are eminently suited
to each other.

The way you look
at each other.

And the-- the way you--

you smile at each other.

- You've got a good marriage.
- They're not married,
Your Honor.

Ask her where they were married.
This is a conference!
She's not on the stand now.

Gentlemen, please.
This is entirely off the record.

It's a sort of a family affair.
There's no courtroom procedure
whatsoever.

It's merely a matter
of good manners
and no raised voices.

Well, where were
we married?

Well, off the record,
at the courthouse
at Three Forks, Idaho.

Three Forks, I-- We can
check that in about two hours,
Your Honor.

Well, unfortunately
for all of us,
that's impossible.

You see, the courthouse
burned down and the records
were destroyed.

That fire?
Mm-hmm.

She--
Your Honor, I'd like
to confer with my client.

You may.

But she's--
Shh!

She's right.
We can't prove a thing.
We're licked.

Not yet we're not.
Now listen to me.
[ Whispering, Inaudible ]

Your Honor,
we're prepared to concede
that it's possible...

Mr. Tyler did in fact
marry Miss Farley.

Uh, this concession,
however, introduces
certain other factors.

Such as?
Oh, merely
routine matters--

all to the benefit
of the Farley Enterprises.

In what way?
My client, being cognizant
of his obligations as a husband,

wishes to assume
his duties in regard
to the Farley interests.

He'd like to see the financial
statement-- uh, to protect his
wife's interests, naturally.

He'd like to assume his
position of authority and take
active charge of the business.

Take over the business?
I merely want to help.

I don't need your help!
After all, Mrs. Tyler,
your husband's devoted to you.

Devoted to me!
His devotion will have
you bankrupt in six months.

Your Honor,
the purpose of this suit
is very evident now.

This literary ne'er-do-well
really wants you to validate
this marriage...

so that he can establish
his dower rights
in the Farley fortune.

Oh, come now, Mr. Rice.

Your Honor, this suit was
brought to determine whether
or not Mr. Tyler married me.

He's admitted that he did,
so I feel that my reputation
has been cleared.

I ask just one other thing
of the court, and that is
to clear my name.

I want this marriage
annulled.

So soon?
I only admitted to being
married a few seconds ago.

Perhaps you're being
a bit hasty, my dear.
Hasty?

Oh, no.
I'm just
not quite bright.

I really thought you were
the one man who wasn't
interested in money.

But you're just
a little more clever
than the others.

You'll-- You'll cherish me,
will you?

You've double-crossed
and lied to me
every chance you had.

At Sun Valley,
when I came to your office,
and now when I--

Well, you can just go
cherish somebody else's
checking account!

Mr. Rice and I can discuss
the terms of the divorce--
I said annulment, not divorce.

But on what grounds?

[ Whispering, Inaudible ]

Why, yes. On the grounds
that they haven't lived
together as man and wife.

Could anything be simpler?
Wait a minute.
How do you know we haven't?

After all, I was there.
You may have been unconscious,
but I wasn't.

That has nothing to do with it.
I deny the allegation.
I deny everything.

Just a minute!
The procedure--
There's been trickery here.

The law is the law! You
married me, but in name only.
You can't get away with this.

Conscious or unconscious,
I'm still your husband!
Quiet. Quiet!

There's been deception
and trickery throughout
this trial. Bailiff!

The chambers of the court
are not the place to settle
domestic feuds. Bailiff!

Nor is it the proper place
to seek an annulment
of marriage. Bai--

I'm not only throwing
this case out of court,

but also the plaintiff,
the defendant
and their attorneys.

And-- And I'm
very disappointed
in you two.

Hmm.
Your Honor.

Bailiff!
Your Honor, please,
I want some advice.

Bailiff!
I gave you my advice.
Only fools repeat themselves.

I'm willing to take it now.
But I'm being annulled.
What can I do about that?

You want her back?
Yes, sir.

You convinced me.
But she wants
to get that annulment.

Well, well.
So I convinced you, hmm?
Yes, sir.

My boy, I can't advise
you personally, but--
[ Clears Throat ]

if you want a judicial tip, the
way to forestall a legal action
is to remove the grounds.

To remove the, uh--
Remove the grounds.

[ Umbrella Thumps ]
Court's adjourned.
I mean, good evening.

Did you call me,
Your Honor?
Huh?

Oh, yes, Bailiff.
Uh, good evening.

Miss Farley--
I mean, Mrs. Tyler--

You were right
the first time, Barret.
Thank you.

Miss Farley,
I want to tell you that--
In the morning, Barret.

Good night.

Oh, thank you.
I--
Uh--

[ Screams ]
Don't be frightened.
It's only me.

How dare you
come in here!

Get out or I'll--
I'll call the police!

You'll call nobody.
I'm your husband.

We haven't
been annulled.
We'll see about that!

We're gonna settle this
once and for all, and we're
gonna settle this now.

Aah! How dare you
handle me this way!

Let me up!
Not until you listen
to what I have to say.

I'm not interested
in anything you have to say.
Help!

Ow! You do that again,
so help me, and I--

You'll what?
I'll tell you what
I came up here to tell you.

I love you.

Well, there's no law
against a man telling his wife
he loves her, is there?

Oh, uh--

If there is,
there shouldn't be.

Oh, Tom. I'm so glad
you're not annulled.

Just a minute.
There's one thing
I'd like to know.

What really happened
at Sun Valley?
Did I marry you?

That's something
you'll never know.

No, but I--
I've got to.
I mean--

Well, you know, if--
if we have children, why--
Well, it w-wouldn't be legal.

0h, all right. If you're
going to worry about it,
we'd better settle this.

We'll get married
all over again
just to keep you happy.

Good idea.

It'll keep
the children happy too.