Original subtitles

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Downloaded from YTS.MX

Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX

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[Baby crying]

[Heartbeat]

♪♪

[Baby coughs]

-[Crying]

-[Laughing]

♪♪

♪♪

[Woman screams]

♪♪

♪♪

[Birds chirping]

["Summer Holiday"plays on radio]

♪♪

-♪ We're all going on a summer holiday♪

♪ No more working for a week or two♪

♪ Fun and laughter on a summer holiday♪

♪ No more worries for me and you♪

♪ For a week or two♪

-Sorry, sorry, darling. Go on, carry on.

-So in 1824,

the whole island quarantined itself in fear

of a deadly flu pandemic.

-Does it say how long the quarantine lasted?

-Yeah. What began as three months

eventually lasted almost two and a half years!

-Wow. What suffering. Amazing.

-Totally amazing.

-Long after the mainland had ended the quarantine,

it remained in place on the island

until most people had either died

or had turned to cannibalism to feed themselves

and their children.

-How many people died? -Oh, it doesn't actually say.

-Bullshit! I need a death toll. -Hey, language.

Why does it matter how many people died?

-Actually, I agree with Sam on this.

It just, it would be nice to have an exact figure.

-Yeah, I think I'd give more of a shit

if it was 200 people rather than, say...

-Four? -Yeah, four.

-Yeah. -Four people.

-Okay, well, I heard it was hundreds.

Are you happy? -Very, thank you.

-Every 10 years, the islanders celebrate the festival of...

Karantan! -Karantan!

-Or quarantine, a gory, eight-hour play --

-Eight fucking hours! -Hey, hey!

-Sorry, Dad.

I fucking hate the theater.

-Mummy, thank you for the info.

-You're welcome, Daddy. -Gross.

I would never eat a person.

-Why not? -I'm a vegetarian.

-Oh, here we go. That's right. -Don't belittle my beliefs.

-Beliefs! Ho-ho-ho! I'm sorry, but believe me,

if you were hungry enough, you'd eat a man.

-Or a woman. -Yeah.

-Don't forget about us! -Sorry.

♪♪

♪♪

-[Arguing in Swedish]

-[Arguing in Swedish]

♪♪

♪♪

-Sorry, hello.

Sorry to interrupt.

Could we order some food, please?

♪♪

-[Speaking Swedish]

-[Speaks Swedish]

-Could I have two hamburgares, please.

And then two pomme frites, chips, fries, chips.

And then two very large beers, please.

And, um, kids, what do you want?

-Yeah, hi.

Sorry, do you have a veggie burger?

-Oh, God. -A bun with no beef?

-Yeah.

-[Speaking Swedish]

-[Laughs]

-We have burgers made from land meat or sea meat.

-Perfect, what's the sea meat?

-Fermented mackerel anus.

-What...um?

-Just chips, thanks.

-Chips. -Yes, thank you.

And, Jessie, what are you having, honey?

-Nothing. I'm not hungry.

-Oh, my God, you have to eat something.

-I'll eat later.

-Well, do you promise me you'll eat later?

-No. -Jessie, where are you --

Oh, my God.

Oh, sorry, could I also --

could I get some cheese on my burger, please?

-Nej. -No, okay. Why not?

Where are you going?

-To find Jessie.

-Geez! Sorry. And sorry about my kids.

They're an absolute nightmare today.

I think they're bored.

Do you have children yourself?

-Nej.It died.

-Well, of course it did.

♪♪

-Ooh! -Hiya!

-Hello, darling. -Here you go.

-Oh, thank you. -Does that taste like fish?

Oh! Sorry.

Thank God we have the table number

so we don't get confused with anyone else.

-Funny.

-Will you go and shout for the kids?

-Where are they?

-Oh, my God, Richard, I don't know.

Use your brain.

-Alright, sorry. -Where are they?

Do I look like a psychic?

-What do you think happened?

-Don't know.

[Camera shutter clicks]

-Kids, food! -We should go.

I'm starving.

♪♪

Ugh! Gross. -Yeah, eww.

♪♪

-That was pretty good. -I don't know.

To me it's like fish. Hello. -Through?

-Yes, thank you.

-It was lovely, thank you very much.

-Let me ask, can we buy tickets here for the ferry?

-Do I look like the ferry?

-No. -No, I just thought I'd ask.

-Where are you going? -Oh, we're going to Svalta.

♪♪

-[Speaking Swedish]

-You cannot go there. It is forbujdetduring Karantan.

-I don't think it is, is it?

-This is Europe, yeah?

-There are no hotels on the island.

This is the last ferry. You'll be stranded.

-No, we won't be stranded

because we're staying on the island.

We've actually booked a B&B. -Look, hang on.

Here. Have a look. -Richard.

-Shush.

-That's the house of Matts Larsson.

-Yes, it is.

It doesn't get more Swedish than that, does it?

-Yes, it does.

-Why did you show him the app?

-He seemed nice. -He's not the B&B police.

-I know he isn't. Sorry. -You don't always have to --

You don't have to apologize for everything.

-Maybe, but -- -Yeah, but it makes me

the bad one.

-I promise you, you will not be welcome on the island.

They don't like visitors at the best of times.

-Oh. Why?

-Foreigners on the island during Karantanplay?

It is like serving pork chops at a bar mitzvah.

-Would anyone do that? -Yeah.

-Delicious. -What's his problem?

-Maybe he doesn't like vegetarians.

-I'm sure there are vegetarians in Sweden.

-Ah. -Stockholm, yeah, sure.

Malmo, Gothenburg, at a push.

-I think it's awful that anyone would hold

onto a grudge for 200 years.

-Says the Irish lady. -[Gasps]

[Boat horn blowing] -The ferry!

-Oh, good. The ferry. -Yes! Come on!

-[Speaking Swedish]

-[Speaking Swedish]

-Hey! I'm sorry to interrupt you.

-What? -Can I pay?

-I don't know. Can you?

-Come on, I'm in a bit of a rush.

♪♪

Please, I'm going to miss the ferry.

-Perhaps that's for the best. -What do I owe you?

♪♪

-Hmm...

300 krona.

-Right, um...

I can't --

My hands are so sweaty.

Right, yes.

-Cash only.

-Okay, uh...

One...

Is that one? Yes. Two.

What are you doing? You're hurting me.

-If you know what's best for you, don't get on that ferry.

Take your nice family

and get back into your hired car and fuck off.

-I said you're hurting me!

I have to leave.

-Don't say I didn't warn you.

♪♪

-What's wrong? Richard?

I know that look. What's wrong?

-I'm fine. -Richard!

-Yes?

-Oh, hello.

Could we order four tickets, please?

-Four tickets? -Mm-hmm.

-To where?

-Well, we're going where you're going, silly.

We're -- Svalta. -Let's go!

-Well, this is most unusual.

-Come on, Dad. [Ship's horn blows]

-Sorry. -What's wrong?

-Oh! -I think I've left

my blooming wallet inside. -D'oh!

-Shut up, Sam. -Sam, just --

Well, then, you numpty, just go run, run, run,

quick, quick, quick, quick. -Yes.

-Go, go! -Yes, yes.

-Go, Richard! Run. -I'm going.

-We must leave now.

To be late is forbjudet.

After this boat, no more.

-Oh, when's the next ferry?

-In three days, after Karantanis over.

-So yeah, four return tickets, please.

-I take your names, please?

-Why do you need our names?

-For our passenger manifest.

In case we sink and everyone drowns.

-Oh, lovely, of course. Well, we're the Smiths.

I'm Susan, and this is Sam. -Just Sam.

-And then this is Jessie.

And then my husband is -- Come on, Daddy!

-Hey!

-And this is Richard, my husband.

Daddy, come on, the tide.

All okay?

-Yeah, fine. -Yeah?

-Yes. -Yes.

Oh, you got some ketchup on your top, silly.

-Oh, yes. Here we are. Thank you.

-Thank you.

-Right, let's go!

Come on.

All aboard the Skylark! -He is so embarrassing.

-We're adopted, right? -You fucking are!

[Ship's horn blows]

♪♪

♪♪

-What's happening?

-I don't know, Richard, I don't know.

[Door opens, closes]

-Fuck off!

-Fuck. It's Johan, the Dane.

-You want to make drink with me?

-Uh... -That's a nice offer.

We're actually not big drinkers, are we?

-No. -I wasn't talking to you,

you fucking four-eyed pussy man.

[Engine revs]

♪♪

-Um... -Shall we? Yes.

-I think we could have a look around the boat.

-Oh, let's.

["Sommar, Sommar, Sommar" plays]

♪ Sommar, sommar, sommar♪

♪ Det a r dans i Folkets Park♪

♪ Sommar, sommar, sommar♪

♪ Hja rtan ska rs I tra dens bark♪

♪ Jag vill viska i ditt ora♪

[Bell tolling]

♪♪

♪♪

-Well, well, well.

Thank you. You honor us!

-No, Richard, don't.

♪♪

-[Speaks Swedish]

-What?

-Who are you?

Why have you come here today?

-Why are you here?

-It's our holiday.

-Holidagen?

-Yes, but not just a holidagen.

We're also here to see your wonderful play.

♪♪

-Play?!

How dare you?

"Billy Elliot" is a play.

"Grease," the musical, is a play.

This is Karantan.

This is our life.

No play.

-Sorry, I think we've got off on the wrong foot.

-The kommune has made a judgment.

You must get back on the ferry and return to the mainland.

You are not welcome here. -Right, but --

-Yeah. Sorry for the push back, we didn't think this was --

It's not a private island, is it?

-Look, all we want to do is just see your thing, the show,

and just pay our respects to the dead.

-The dead?

What do you know of the dead?

-Oh, well, quite a lot actually.

-Mum, just don't. -No, no, no, no.

Honestly, they'll find it interesting.

They will find it interesting.

My great, great, great, great, great grandfather

actually died here on this island,

on Svalta.

-Who was your ancestor?

-He was the -- well, one of the brave officers

who your ancestors murdered.

[Murmuring]

-[Growls]

You will leave this place one way or another.

-Oh! Ugh!

-Sue, Mummy, are you --

-She licked my face, she licked my face!

-Oh, hey! Hey, hey, hey!

I see you have already met our friendly kommune.

Welcome to Svalta.

-Thank you. -I'm -- I'm -- I'm Matts.

They are mostly harmless.

-[Growls] -Mostly.

-Well, they don't seem harmless. -Yeah.

-Matts Larsson! You know these outsiders?

-Huh. Yes.

I have rented them my mother's house.

-You did not seek agreement from the kommune.

-This is not your island.

It is not any of your business

who I rent my mother's house to.

This is Sweden, 2024.

[Speaks Swedish]

-The rules of our society on this matter are clear.

-The rules remain in place

to protect us from people like this.

-200 years ago.

-Your poor mother would turn in her grave

if she could see what kind of a man you have become.

-I hope you'll be able to tell her about it

in person one day soon.

♪♪

-Do enjoy your time on Svalta.

It will be short.

♪♪

-Thank you. -"Thank you."

God, honestly, I give up, I give up.

-Okay, come on. Put your bags on the cart.

We will go now to your house. -It's fine.

We'll -- We'll push it ourselves, thank you.

-That's your decision. -Kids, wait a second.

Hey. You okay?

If you're having second thoughts,

you should probably say something right now.

-No, I need this holiday, Richard.

I need it.

It'll be good. We'll be fine. -Okay.

-Yeah. -Good.

-Yeah. [Ship's horn blows]

-Oh. Shoes off, please.

-Oh, of course.

-You'll find a pair of slippers here for each of you.

-Do I have to? I'd rather keep my trainers on.

-It is the tradition in Sweden, so if you can.

-Well, it's our tradition...

-Feels comfy womfy? No?

-Yeah. -Alright.

-Comfy womfy.

-I don't understand why I have to take my trainers off.

-It's our tradition here in Skane.

Feels comfy too? -Stop saying that.

My trainers are comfy. -Just --Just put them on.

-Fuck! -Shh, shh, shh.

Well, well, well. This is lovely.

It's very Swedish.

-That's because we are in Sweden.

-Yeah. -He's got you there.

-'Cause we are.

[Laughs] -And you were saying this --

this was your mother's house, Matts?

-Yeah, she was born here, and in 1974 she married my father,

right here, on the island.

-God, that is so sweet.

-Yeah, no, no, no, it was February, minus-25.

Very bad snow.

My mother and her sisters arrived at the ferry

only to find the sea outside the harbor wall had frozen solid.

-Oh, what happened? -Well, in their high heels

and...

big coats, they walked across the ice.

My father and...

♪♪

...his brothers met them in the harbor,

and the wedding went ahead.

-Hmm. -That is so romantic.

-Yeah.

-And is she still with us, Matts?

-Sadly, no. She died 10 years ago, aged 91.

-Wow. -God.

-I'm sorry. But she had a lovely, long life.

-Yes, and then she was murdered, beheaded,

right there in her favorite chair.

-Oh. -Jesus.

-Um... -Sorry.

-Um, Richard, get up out of the chair.

-Can we go up stairs and check out our rooms?

-Yeah, of course, of course.

This is your house now. -Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

-Oh, thank you. -Just...good.

-Get the fuck up out of the chair, Richard.

-Let me take you. There we go.

-It's about time you got up.

♪♪

-I want this one. -Fucking hell, Sam!

[Thump] -[Groans]

-[Laughs] -Jesus!

-Dickhead. [Laughs]

[Sighs]

Oh, fuck sake!

My phone's got no signal, Sam.

-Of course it hasn't!

We've come on holiday to a Swedish horror film.

♪♪

-Hej.

Don't be scared.

It's only Matts.

-I'm not scared.

I just didn't hear you come up.

-Oh, I'm almost silent in my slippers.

-Maybe you should wear a little bell round your neck.

-Oh, like a young cat. -Yeah.

That way you can let the little birds know you're coming.

Now why would I want to do that?

♪♪

-Meow!

♪♪

-Meow!

Meow!

-Fuck off.

-[Groans] Dickhead!

-I must go and leave you to begin your vacation.

-Oh, Matts, before you go,

did you manage to get those bits of shopping I asked for?

-Oh, yeah, I did.

I put it all away into the cupboards and -- and the fridge.

-[Speaks Swedish poorly]

-Well, we better get on.

This chicken paprika isn't going to make itself.

-Yeah. Oh, I couldn't get paprika.

-Oh, not to worry.

-Or chicken.

-Well, toasties it is then, Daddy.

-Delicious. -Mm-hmm.

♪♪

♪♪

-Oh!

Wow! These are razor sharp.

-Be careful, Daddy.

-Life must've been so shit before phones.

No wonder they had massive fucking wars, right?

So bored all the time. Nothing better to do.

-Have I got time for a bath?

-'Course you do, darling! You're on your holibobs!

Go have a nice soak and forget about your phone.

-Ow! Don't touch me. Don't fucking touch me!

Mum, can you tell her? -Yeah, don't fucking touch him.

-Not -- Jessie, don't --

[Water running]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Shuffling]

[Shuffling]

[Shuffling]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

-[Snoring]

♪♪

♪♪

-[Snoring]

♪♪

♪♪

-What's going on?

-Well, I don't know, do I? How am I supposed to know?

-I don't understand. What do we do?

-I'm going down there. -Don't be stupid.

-I am, I'm going down there.

Anyway, I'm not going to be scared away by these people.

Whatever they are.

We have every right to be here, Richard.

-We do, but Brexit!

Sus.

♪♪

♪♪

-Leave us alone!

♪♪

There are children inside sleeping.

And you're frightening us.

So please, just...

Go away!

♪♪

-[Gasps]

♪♪

Richard, look.

-What are you doing?

You can't leave that here!

♪♪

-Well, thanks for your help, Richard.

-I thought I'd let you helm this one.

-Oh, cheers. -Are you cross?

Hey, we talked about this in couple's counseling.

It's really important, you know, as a man,

that sometimes I sit back and empower you, and you did great.

-Shut the fuck up, Richard.

-Sorry.

-I'm going back to bed. You can deal with this.

-What do you want me to do with it?

-Work it out!

-D-- Do we have bin bags?

♪♪

♪♪

[Bell tolling]

♪♪

Hey, morning! You alright?

-No, not really.

-Okay. Um... Something I can help with?

-Probably not. -Is this about last night?

-No, what happened last night?

-Forget it. What's on your mind?

'Cause you know, you can talk to me about anything.

I won't be shocked, I promise.

Between us, when I was a younger man,

I used to live in Vienna, and, uh...

Between us, I used to do a bit of the old cannabis.

[Laughs]

Ah.

-I feel like we are being watched.

-What makes you say that?

-So last night I was taking a soak,

and I could hear noises coming from behind that big mirror.

-Right. What kind of noises?

-I don't know, like a shuffling,

a loud crack. -Alright, well, look, I mean,

it could have been us moving around.

It's a very old house. -No. It wasn't that.

[Voice breaking] 'Cause it was actually quite creepy, and...

-Shh, come here. -I'm sorry, I just, um...

-It's alright. It's okay.

If you ever hear anything else again,

just come and wake me up, alright?

-Yeah, okay. -You promise?

-Sorry, oh, God. I'm just being, like, silly, I feel like.

-Joking aside, what I said before about cannabis...

-Right.

-Don't do it because in -- in the end, for me,

I went a bit mad.

And it wasn't nice.

-Well, no, I-I tried cannabis once, and, um, not my thing,

it wasn't for me. I hated it.

-Good. -So yeah. Cool?

-Cool. -Cool.

-What is your thing?

-Cocaine and fat dicks.

-[Coughs]

-[Spits]

♪♪

♪♪

[Knock on door]

[Lock clicks]

-Hey! -Oh, hey.

-Can -- Can I come in?

♪♪

[Chuckles]

This is a bit awkward. Um...

You didn't happen to see all the people outside here last night,

did you?

-No. What were they doing?

-Um...It's hard to say.

They were...humming.

It was just really -- really threatening, you know?

-Hmm. -Look.

They threw this at us.

♪♪

-Oh. -Do you know what it is?

-It's dead.

-Yeah, I know it's -- it's dead, but...

It also feels a bit like a warning, you know?

-Yeah, maybe, maybe not.

It could also be this kind of

a traditional welcome here in Skane.

-Ah, right.

[Birds calling]

Is it a traditional welcome here in Skane?

-No. It is a warning.

-Ever since we came to Svalta,

we have felt nothing but unwelcome,

and -- and it's -- it's a shame, you know,

because the app, it promised so much more.

And j-- Between us, I'm not --

I'm not a confrontational person at all, but...

our review is going to be less than favorable.

♪♪

-I will take this to the kommune.

-Thank you. I-I appreciate that. It's, uh...

It's been a hell of a year.

We need this, you know?

Okay. Thank you.

-Yeah. -Bye-bye.

♪♪

-Oh, God, I needed this.

-Hang on.

Here we go, hang on. No...

That's video. Portrait.

-What are you doing?

-Hang on, let me do it that way.

-Oh, give it to me.

♪♪

-I love you, Mummy.

-Oh, love you, Daddy. Can't wait till the big day.

♪♪

-Ha! Beautiful!

♪♪

[Camera shutter clicks]

-Okay.

Nice.

Tak.

♪♪

♪♪

-[Burps]

♪♪

[Bird screeching] -Duck, Richard!

-Ah! -Or stay still, actually.

-Susan! What do I do?

-Just -- Oh!

You've got to stay still, Richard!

-Stop laughing! Stop it!

-He thinks you're one of his eggs!

-What does it want? -He thinks you're an egg!

-I'm not an egg! Stop it! -You are!

[Slurping]

-Look, there's a boat.

-Oh. Looks so small.

-That's because it's quite far away.

-Gimme that.

Oh, look at that.

Do you think that's because four people have died?

-Not yet.

-Oi! Jessie and me are going to go for a swim.

-Oh, will you be careful though? -No.

-Will you be alright on your own?

-No.

-[Sighs]

Pair of idiots.

-Do you think they're happy?

-Honestly, right now, I couldn't give a shit.

-Do you want a blow job?

-[Chuckles] What?

-Do you want a blow job?

-[Laughs]

♪♪

-Hej,Detective.

♪♪

How is Yanet?

-Yanet died.

-This is the way of life.

It ends.

-It does end.

Have you seen Johan today?

-I saw him getting off the ferry yesterday.

Very drunk.

Oh, my, this is serious.

He's only just been released.

Have you alerted the kommunity?

-Not yet.

-Klara will want to know.

♪♪

-[Laughs]

-Oh!

Come on! Oh! Oh!

Oh, Mama.

-Dada. -Mama.

♪♪

♪♪

-I'm sorry to... -Stop!

How dare you interrupt my rehearsal?

-Murder. That's why.

I'm sure you'll understand death comes before art.

Do you know Johan?

-The Dane? -Have you seen him today?

-Nej.

♪♪

-Did any of you see him?

-He left the island.

-Are you sure?

Do you know where he went?

-Probably to the Systembolaget to get more vodka.

♪♪

-Thank you for your time. -Good.

Leave this place and don't come back.

You have no jurisdiction here, Detective Forsberg.

In here, the Karantanis judge.

It is our way.

It has always been our way.

-Be careful.

I'd hate for you to do something rash and lose your head.

♪♪

♪♪

-Fuck you!

♪♪

[Bell jingles]

-Hej! Hej! We're closing soon,

but would you like to taste my crispy waffle?

-Waffle? Yes, please!

-Coming here was a big mistake for you.

-Why?

Are your waffles shit? -How dare you!

[Bell jingling]

[Door closes]

♪♪

-It's fine, we'll leave.

-Yes, you will.

-Okay, you know what?

We don't want to be here, mate, okay?

We're only here because our parents want to see

a stupid fucking play.

-Not a play! -Okay, and you know what?

Your waffles look dry as fuck anyway.

-My waffles...are moist!

-They don't look it, so...

-Don't fucking touch me.

-Ah! Ah! Ah! My eyes!

-Okay, let's fucking go.

♪♪

♪♪

-[Laughs]

[Laughter]

♪♪

♪♪

-[Laughs]

-[Laughs]

♪♪

Oh!

-Oh. -[Laughs]

-Dickhead.

-I mean, the name plate said, "English Liars"!

-This shit is so weird.

What is happening, for fucks sakes!

We should tell the others.

-No, no, don't.

You know, I don't want Mum to miss the play.

You know, she's been trying so hard.

Sam, will you put the kettle...on?

♪♪

Sam, have you -- have you been in here?

-No, why?

-Um, be honest.

Did you, um -- Did you move my underwear?

-[Laughs]

-You're being shifty as fuck right now, Sam.

-I'm not! Sorry! I'm nervous.

-Okay, look, if you took them to seagull off into,

or have a sniff, whatever, okay, I don't care.

I just want them back. They were £22.

-Ugh! Seagull! Don't be weird.

I'm gay.

-Oh. Okay, whoa. Didn't know that about you.

-There's lots you don't know about me.

-I'm sure there is. -There are.

[Shuffling]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

-You have all worked very hard the last 10 months.

Well done.

I have worked hard all my life.

It's what I do.

I have been doing this successfully for many years now,

many Karantans.

♪♪

But soon my time will end,

and it will be time for one of you

to become the custodian of our traditions.

[Applause]

I am proud and honored to say that I have been shown a way,

and have been given the opportunity very recently

to close the circle.

-It would be great to have some clarity about what you mean

when you say "close the circle."

-In years gone by,

we honored the traditions by sacrificing tributes.

[Murmuring]

-I guess as much as we want to honor the dead of the Karantan,

the thought that you would want us to...

-I think what Marten is trying to say

is that the thought of having to...

-Speak your mind, Ingemar.

-Kill again.

It seems very old-fashioned.

I know it was our way in the past, but now...

-The English arriving here has solidified my resolve.

It offered me an unsurpassed clarity.

♪♪

The English must be offered up.

It will be the greatest modern Karantanever.

-I thought we were just going to scare them off!

-The last time we honored the Karantanin this way,

we were all much younger.

-I wasn't even born yet!

-The world was different then.

-Was it?

I don't think it was that different.

I remember you that summer, Sven Svensson.

You couldn't wait to kill those poor people.

-We won't kill and eat people.

We love the Karantan,and our culture and traditions but --

-You will do what I fucking tell you to do!

You will not fuck this opportunity up for me.

[Indistinct conversation]

♪♪

♪♪

-Jesus.

These potatoes are shit.

Jens, do you hear?

♪♪

-Matts Larsson, how are you?

♪♪

I assume you received a visit from Detective Forsberg.

A policeman on the island at the time of Karantanis bad.

As you know,

a lot of work has gone into this year's production.

As always.

And the Karantanwill go ahead as it always has.

Our debt must be paid.

You know this. -Yes.

-Bringing those people here was wrong, Matts.

The kommune did not approve such a request,

and look what has happened.

-Why should I have to get the approval of a kommune

that barely recognizes my existence?

-Because it is our way.

It is the way of Svalta,

ever since the first Karantan, Matts Larsson.

You do what you want.

You come and go, drunk pretty girls, pretty boys.

They arrive laughing. They leave crying.

We see this.

You pray on weakness, beauty,

you are a pervert, an alcoholic,

a drug-taking pig.

I make sure that we turn a blind eye

to these indiscretions.

Do you know why I do this?

Hmm?

Because you are one of us.

That could very easily change.

Do you understand?

-What do you want?

-It's 200 years since the Karantanbegan.

This is a big deal I think.

I feel this anniversary be celebrated in the old style.

There are some who think that...

About what went before.

They no longer have the stomach for the old ways.

I think you might. Hmm?

-We haven't done that for 30 years.

-When the Karantanis complete tomorrow,

I will come to your home,

and we will put things right together.

We shall eat roast beef.

The old way.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

Perhaps our friends would like some nice cookies.

Do you have everything you need for this recipe?

♪♪

Hm.

♪♪

[Bell tolling]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

-Mmm.

-You know, you moan about my little plastic bags

of bits and bobs, but I bet you're glad

I brought my own teabags from home now.

-Yeah. Absolutely delicious. -Mm.

-I will never doubt you again, Mummy!

-Oh! Can I have that in writing, Daddy?

[Both laugh]

♪♪

Did you sleep okay? -Yeah, I did.

-Yeah? It was deep, and...

-Mm-hmm.

-I just feel really refreshed here.

You? -Same. Just relaxed.

-I finished what I was saying. [Laughter]

-Ah! Hello, gang!

-Morning. -Morning.

-Everything alright last night?

-Yeah, it was fine. -Let's eat!

-Whoo! -[Laughs] Daddy!

-Right, I don't want to have to keep virtue signaling,

but I'm not going to eat this.

-Well, then just eat the egg, Sam.

-I'm not going to eat an undeveloped hen fetus.

-Hen fetus? It's a bloody egg. -You're a bloody egg.

-Don't call me that. -Sam.

-Don't call me that.

Egg. Why would he say egg? -Richard, please.

Don't call Daddy an egg.

Okay?

Now, why don't we finish up breakfast,

and go and get dressed because today is the big day.

-Yeah. -Yes.

-Today is the big day! -Whoo!

♪♪

♪♪

-Good news.

I had a little chat with the kommune,

and they decided that you guys are more than

welcome to see the play.

They even reserved seats for you.

-Great, thank you.

Are you not heading out to see the Karantan?

-Nope.

-Going for a swim in the harbor.

-I thought you came here specifically to see the play.

-Not all of it, mate. -It's eight hours long, babe!

-I guarantee you though, we shan't miss the climax.

-Are you back for lunch? -Oh, absolutely.

-Great! I have a surprise for you.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Man shouts in Swedish] [Booing]

♪♪

[Booing]

[Man shouts in Swedish]

[Booing]

[Man shouts in Swedish]

♪♪

-Nej!

I don't want to gobble your kaga.

Not while the rest of the kommune struggles so.

-As you wish.

But know the mainland is still rife with disease.

Many thousands dead. Many more dying.

-Oh!

-It will be months before you get the chance

to eat a moist kargan again.

♪♪

-[Honks] [Laughter]

♪♪

[Booing]

-Why won't you open the harbor?

-As the leader of this kommunity,

I have decided to keep the harbor closed for now.

It is for the best.

[Booing]

-[Honks] [Laughter]

-But for how long?

We can't take this much more.

-Our English friends shall let us know

when it is safe to lift the Karantan.

[Booing]

[Laughter]

[Booing]

-That was sweet!

-Now perhaps I will feast upon your sweet Kaga.

-Nej!

[Applause]

-Splash, Daddy!

-That's enough. -Sam! Sam, come on!

-You get one! And you, and you!

-Stop! -Oh, grow up.

-I...

have received word from our English friends.

[Booing]

I'm afraid the Karantan must endure.

-[Shouts in Swedish] -Nej!

-Our children and families are dead.

We are weak and many are close to the end.

♪♪

-People have started to eat the dead.

-I didn't know they were dead!

[Laughter]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

-Oh! Oh, that's nice.

Looks like it's time for a cup of tea and...

-Together: Biccies! -Yay.

[Booing]

-Traitor! -Turncoat!

-Traitor!

-Soon the whole island will be dead.

And who will profit then?

-What's wrong, Mr. Larsson?

Are you losing the stomach for it?

I think not.

[Laughter]

-I have let friends die.

Wives have lost husbands.

Fathers have buried children.

Why?

There is no disease!

-Nej!

♪♪

-I never imagined the horror our deal would bring.

-What did you think would happen, old thing?

-They grow thin and weak while you grow fat and rich.

♪♪

-Nej! Nej!

-Nej!

-Rotten turncoat!

-Ohh!

[Cheers and applause]

♪♪

-Hmm.

-Hmm, these are unusual.

-Hmm. -Gross.

-Oh. -They're really dry.

I think that's... -You could...

-What? Dry! Fuck you.

Yeah, dig in. Enjoy.

[Cheers and applause]

-Your lies will weaken us no more.

You will suffer as we have suffered.

-Might I beg your pardon for one last wish

before you pass your final judgment?

-Yor!

♪♪

-♪ God save our gracious King

♪ Long live our noble King

-♪ God save the King

♪ Send him victorious

♪ Happy and glorious

♪ Long to reign over us

♪ God save the King

♪ Thy choicest gifts in store

♪ On him be pleased to pour

♪ Long may he reign

♪ May he defend our laws

♪ And ever give us cause

♪ To sing with heart and voice

♪ God save the King

-Please, no!

Please!

-Oops. [Chuckles]

Rest assured, Matts,

you'll be getting a big thumbs up from us on the app.

-No, no, no, no. -Goodbye, Matts.

-Mama! Mama!

[Screaming]

♪♪

-[Screams]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[Cheers and applause]

♪♪

["Run to the Hills"plays]

♪♪

[Cheers and applause]

-Help!

[Screaming]

♪♪

♪ White man came

♪ Across the sea

♪ He brought us pain

♪ And misery

♪ He killed our tribes

♪ He killed our creed

♪ He took our game

♪ For his own need

♪ We fought him hard

♪ We fought him well

♪ Out on the plains

♪ We gave him hell

♪ But many came

♪ Too much for Cree

♪ Oh, will we ever be set free? ♪

-What is happening?

-People are being killed! -Who would attack us here?

-We should leave, find shelter.

There must be a boat in the harbor we can use.

-I am not running away.

This is a moment to cherish.

My last Karantan, my best Karantan.

I deserve all the --

-I am going to try and call the Polargen

from the harbor office.

-Fuck the Polargen!

-It's Johan the Dane!

He's going to kill us all! Run!

-I can't stay here. Come with me.

-I can't.

-Then good luck.

-♪ Run to the hills -Ah!

-Hello. -[Grunts]

-♪ Run for your life

♪ Run to the hills

-[Groans]

-You okay? -I am so unfit.

I'm bloody Kate bushed.

-I really wish you'd kept up street jazz

with me and Mandy, you know.

-I fucking hate street jazz! -♪ Run for your life

-Yeah, but you were getting really good at it.

-Alright, maybe. -What shall we do now?

-Oh, God! This is your slaycation.

What do you want to do?

-Clyde River Paradigm! -Yeah!

-Come on! -Whoo!

-Sorry, Daddy. Look, I'm not trying to stress you,

I just worry about your shoulder.

-Oh, I'm alright. -I hate feeling like a nag.

-Hoo. -You know?

-Yeah. -And if you strengthen up

that back, then everything else becomes easy.

-Welcome to the harbor office communication center.

[Laughs]

-Do you want to cry this time or shall I?

-I thought you couldn't cry on your meds.

-Obviously actual tears can't come out,

but it'll look like I'm crying.

-Shall I, like, pretend to comfort you?

-Fuck no. Don't touch me. -Okay, fucking sorry.

-It's okay, I -- I appreciate you asking.

-Cool, bro. -Yeah.

-Yeah.

-[Hyperventilating, sobs]

-Ready? -Yeah.

[Laughs]

-[Laughs] -What?

-Let's do Mumma, Mumma. Let's do Mumma, Mumma.

-Yeah, yeah, okay, okay, okay.

Mumma! Mumma! [Pounding on door]

Mumma, Mumma, Mumma!

Mumma! -Please help us!

-My poor children!

Come in! -There was a strange man!

-Hide from the monsters.

[Knives plunging]

-♪ Run to the hills

♪ Run for your life

-We are the monsters, babes.

♪♪

♪♪

[Camera shutter clicks]

[Man shouts in Swedish]

Yeah, hmm.

-I'm bored.

Alright, let's fuck this place up.

-Fuck yeah.

♪♪

-Please, Klara, come with me.

We have to hide.

-I don't have to do anything, Sven Svensson.

This is my island,

and I assure you everything is fine.

-[Screaming]

♪♪

-I am going to pay a visit to my friend Matts Larsson.

♪♪

-[Screams]

-Jesus Christ.

♪♪

[Glass breaks]

♪♪

♪♪

-So pretty.

-It's not pretty, it's bad news.

-I wasn't talking about the flare.

♪♪

-[Chuckles]

You're a cheese ball.

-♪ Killing

♪ Killing

-♪ Mama loves a-killing

♪ Mama loves a-killing with you ♪

-[Groans]

[Panicked Swedish radio chatter]

-This is Kristianstad Harbor Control.

Please, one at -- One at a time!

-We are at siege, please!

-Go, go! Hide, quick! -Go, go, go, go, go!

-Hey. What do you want to do?

-Hmm, I think we should see how many we trap,

and then we pounce. -Yeah.

-And then we can set this shit on fire, baby!

-Hey, kids. You having fun? -Yeah, having a ball!

-Ugh! My photos won't upload to the Slay-cation App.

-Hmm. It's like someone's smashed up

all the comms equipment, isn't it?

-Fuck.

-That flare was pretty, wasn't it?

-Yeah, yeah, it was.

-Love you. -Put your dick away, Dad.

♪♪

-My -- my dick?

-Yes, your willy, hanging between your legs.

♪♪

-Oh! -Ooh!

-Right, let's go grab ourselves a Swede.

-Fucking veggies.

♪♪

-Open this door at once.

You know how I get when I'm hungry.

-It's for your own good, Klara.

-[Growls]

Has anyone seen Ingemar?

-I saw him heading down towards the Vandrarhem some minutes ago.

-Fucking coward.

Just like his fat mother.

-We have seen a lot of death and suffering.

We must leave here, find a boat, and go.

-I am not leaving my island!

♪♪

[Pounding on door]

Get back!

It is Johan the Dane!

♪♪

-I need to whizz so badly! -[Laughs]

-What?! Richard, you're a homicidal maniac.

Just piss yourself. Be a man about it.

-No, it's weird. It's weird. -What?! Just --

Who gives a shit? -[Laughs]

-Stop it! No, I'm not a lunatic.

I'll be all wet then. -No, stop it!

Daddy doesn't want to wet himself.

-I'm going to cry!

[Pounding on door] -Who's there?

-Johan is going to kill us!

[Pounding on door]

[Crying]

♪♪

[Screams]

♪♪

[Knife plunges]

-[Gasps]

♪♪

Fucking Danes.

-Hey, got one! -Ta-ta!

-Yeah! -Yeah! Come on, Daddy.

-Klara.

Fucking Danes.

-[Screams]

["Monsieur Kannibal"plays]

Oh! Oh! -Oh, that is deep!

-Oh, my, he's knocked one of my crowns out.

-Oh!

-[Speaks Swedish]

-[Grunts]

♪♪

-[Grunts]

-[Screams]

♪♪

-No, no!

No! No!

♪♪

-Uh-oh!

♪♪

Hee-hee-hee-heehee!

Ah!

♪♪

Silly goose! [Laughs]

-Mummy?

♪♪

-Marten.

Oh, thank Grud. When I saw the flares --

-Your waffles look dry as fuck.

[Door closes, lock clicks]

-Fuck it. [Grunts]

♪♪

-Oh, oh.

Please. Please, no.

♪♪

Please don't!

-[Chuckles]

♪♪

Hmm. That was good, wasn't it? -Yeah.

-Okay, come on. Let's get back to it, yeah?

And you. -Are you alright?

-I need to do a --

I need to do a toilet.

-Oh! Okay, got it, got it.

Out of here.

[Zipper unzips]

[Urinating]

[Cellphone rings]

♪♪

-This better be good.

-Forsberg, hello? Forsberg, are you there?

Hello, Forsberg! -Hello?

-This is Agnes at Harbor Control.

You need to listen up! -Yeah.

-Really good. Svalta is under siege!

Many people are dead. -Yeah?

-The town is burning! It's a massacre!

-Is this a fucking joke? -A real fucking massacre!

-A massacre in Svalta? -Yes, you're correct!

-Have you been smoking meth again, Agnes?

-Johan the Dane has been spotted on the island.

I am serious. -Wake Peter.

-Why? -Tell him I need Lucky Linda.

-What does Peter have to do with --

-Tell Peter I need Lucky Linda. Do it!

-Johan just went fucking berserk!

Everything is on fire!

♪♪

-Hmm.

The smell reminds me of our honeymoon.

-Mm. Kasiruta.

-Kasiruta. -Mm-hmm.

-God, it was so romantic. -Mm.

-Hey, do you remember when you pegged me with that guy's

fat dismembered willy? -[Laughs]

Yeah, I do.

-Disgusting. Give it a break, Jesus.

-You eff off, Sam. It was nice before you arrived.

-Why don't you fuck off, Dad?

-You should checkity check yourself, boy.

-Should I? -Yeah, you should.

You got on my fucking tits this trip.

-Have I?

-Yeah, you have.

-Fuck you, Richard.

-Yeah, fuck you too, Sam.

Or should I say Ian.

-[Gasping]

-I'm fucking sorry we invited you back after last time.

-Why did you do that? -Oh, my God!

-That is so naughty. -Why? Okay, why.

His attitude generally is shit,

his characterization is 2-D and cliche at best,

and his personal hygiene is absolutely fucking disgusting.

♪♪

-It's because I have AD...HD.

-Yeah.

Well, now you got D-E-A-D.

-Well done. -Brilliant, Richard, brilliant.

-And who is going to have to sort all of this out?

Muggins over here. Muggins.

-You know, I just wish that we could talk about things

before it gets to this point. -Exactly.

-You know what I mean? Just before.

-Yes, yes, yes because I'm the one

who's going to have to spend two hours

on the phone to international clean up,

whereas what I really want to be doing

is very simply going around, killing a few people,

and then sitting down and having a nice, cold glass of rosé.

You can you understand that, can't you, Richard?

-Yes, yes.

-You know what the worst thing about all this is,

is now we have to go out and source an entire new brother,

and that's a task.

-Alright, I get -- I'm sorry, alright?

But just hear me out, alright?

-Do we forgive him? -Um...

[Fake whispering]

-Okay, stop teasing me!

You're not really whispering.

-Okay, let's go back to the house

and have a nice cup of tea. Come on.

-Oh, yeah! -Ah.

-Come on, Daddy, come on.

-[Clears throat]

♪♪

Now who's a fucking egg?

♪♪

-Klara, Klara, wait.

You're still determined to pay tribute?

-Perhaps that it is the want of the Karantan.

-Enough! There is little room for these old ways.

♪♪

-Sven Svensson, I love you.

I could not have wished for a better son.

When you are in charge,

you can do whatever you want.

But tonight, this is for me.

Help me complete the Karantan.

♪♪

-I will make a tribute with you one last time.

♪♪

Just let me go to my home and get my shotgun.

[Laughter] -I know.

Ah, God.

-Go, go, go, to Matts' house.

Quick, Daddy.

♪♪

-I fucking told you!

-Yeah. Yeah, you did.

-Disgusting, that pervert.

I'm bloody glad we brutally murdered him now.

-Oh, yeah. -Me too.

Where do you think this leads?

-Obviously it leads back to the house, Richard.

-Yeah, no, I know.

I'm just trying to be rhetorical.

-Oh, sorry, sorry. I didn't get that, sorry.

-How do you want to do this? -Well, Daddy...

You know there's someone

I've been very impressed with this week.

-Who's that, Mummy?

-It is someone who is a very good girl indeed.

-Oh.

-And who is blooming into quite the lovely young lunatic.

-Stop it! [Laughs]

-I wonder where she gets that from?

-I think that, um...

I think that Jessie is ready to lead her first Trojan Horse.

-Yes! Yes! -Well deserved. Well done.

Well done, you. -Do you really want to do that?

-Go on, I'll meet you round there.

-Fucking love you guys! Whoo!

You coming?

-No, I'm going to...

I'm just going to put my feet up and watch it on the telly.

-Alright, I'll see you there.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

-[Whimpers] Help me.

[Gunshot]

♪♪

Fuck! Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!

He killed them! -Bullshit!

-No, no, no, no, no, he killed my dad, he killed my brother.

[Gun cocks] Okay, okay.

-Who? Who did?

-Matts Larsson.

-Matts Larsson?

How? When did he do this? Why?

-[Crying] I don't know, I don't know.

He just went berserk.

I've lost -- I've lost everyone.

-What do you know about loss?

Ha! You will know.

-What did you say?

Okay, come, come, come here.

-What is it?

-He's still here.

♪♪

-I must check the rest of the house.

-No, no, no, no, just please don't!

Please don't leave me on my own! I'm -- I'm so scared!

I'm so scared! Please don't!

[Whimpers]

-Tell me, girl.

Where are your family now?

Where are their bodies?

-He ate them.

-[Gasps]

He better not have!

[Pounding on door]

-No, no, no, no, don't! Don't, don't open it!

Don't open it. It might be a psychopath.

♪♪

-You let me in! You witch, you let me in!

Get away from my baby!

Baby? Baby!

-Mummy! -Baby!

It is a psychopath.

-Oh, no!

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

-Hara gud.

♪♪

-[Groaning]

♪♪

-Hej?

♪♪

Hello?

-Please help me.

[Crying]

♪♪

Sucka!

♪♪

[Gunshot]

-[Screaming]

Mummy!

-Sven Svensson! Come down this moment.

♪♪

Sven Svensson!

-Ah.

♪♪

-They blew my fucking hand off.

-Oh, Daddy!

You're going to have to wank southpaw now.

-No, no, no, it's too soon, it's too soon.

-Sorry.

-Hello.

Ah?

-It was you! The English.

Of course.

History repeats itself once again.

The English lied to our Larsson.

I now realize that the Karantanitself was

but a dress rehearsal.

This is the real performance.

♪♪

[Screams]

[Gunshot]

-They killed my boy! -Mama! Mama!

-They took the hand I write with.

-We need to leave.

Right now. Go!

-Yes. -Yes.

-Oh, come on, Daddy. -Go!

Yeah. -Oh, baby girl.

-Excuse me. Come on, baby.

-Oh, oh.

♪♪

[Explosion]

["I Eat Cannibals"plays]

♪♪

-That's Johan the Dane! -He's getting away!

-♪ I eat cannibals -Freeze!

[Gunshots] -♪ Feed on animals

♪ Your love is so edible to me

♪ I eat cannibals

-That was the best holiday ever.

-Well, you know what they say, gang.

The family that slay together...

-Stay together!

-[Laughs] -Daddy.

You're a cheese ball, but I love you.

-♪ I'm never gonna stop

♪ Fancy a bite

♪ My appetite

♪ Yum, yum, gee, it's fun

♪ Banging on a different drum

♪ And I eat cannibals

♪ Feed on animal

♪ Your love is so edible to me

♪ I eat cannibals

♪ I eat cannibals

♪ It's incredible

♪ You bring out the animal in me ♪

♪ I eat cannibals

♪ You got the spice

♪ Tasty and nice

♪ Roastin' vitamin

♪ Forget the dietin'

♪ Ooh, such a dish

♪ I can't resist

♪ Healthy recipe

♪ What you got is good for me

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪ All I wanna do

♪ Is make a meal of you

♪ We are what we eat

♪ You're my kind of meat

♪ I got a hunger for your love

♪ You're all I'm thinkin' of

♪ So give the world a bone

♪ 'Cause I got steak at home

♪ I got steak at home

♪ 'Cause I eat cannibals

♪ Feed on animals

♪ Your love is so edible to me

♪ I eat cannibals

♪ I eat cannibals

♪ It's incredible

♪ You bring out the animal in me ♪

♪ Cannibals

♪♪

♪ I eat cannibals

♪ It's incredible

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

-♪ Killing

♪ Killing

-♪ Mama loves a-killing

♪ Mama loves a-killing with you ♪

-♪ Killing

♪ Killing

-♪ Daddy loves a-killing

♪ Daddy loves a-killing with you ♪

-I love you.

-Je t'aime.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪