Original subtitles

[upbeat music plays]

[phone rings]

Stein.

I definitely think Dan can be curmudgeonly. [chuckles]

I'm with a customer right now.

I kind of think he puts on the grouch thing

to, you know, startle people, and then he lures them in with kindness.

You're gonna be a movie star. You know that, right?

He's our friend, Dan.

I mean, we all have friends that we hate, right?

I like to think that I'm a very caring person,

but please don't tell anybody.

"Our hero this week is a man named Dan Stein."

"He is a local legend in New Orleans."

"He's the owner of Stein's Market and Deli,

a local institution…"

-[Tan] Love an institution! -Love a deli. Love an institution.

"…that's famous for two things. Sandwiches and Dan Stein." Whoo!

I've been running Stein's Market and Deli for a little bit over 15 years now.

It is really the center of the community.

[Dan] We welcome everybody.

Annoying, not annoying.

[Cara] He's known for doing these crazy ad campaigns.

I think half of New Orleans has seen my boyfriend's tuchus.

-Cool. -[man] Dan, you owe me pickles.

[Dan] I don't owe you anything.

Everybody in the city knows Dan Stein.

We're all there to get our sandwich and get yelled at.

"Describing Dan as a workaholic would be an understatement."

"The man works over 80 hours seven days a week at his deli."

It is all deli.

-Kosher salt. -All the time.

"He's in his first serious relationship with his girlfriend of two years, Cara."

He's in a relationship, with that schedule?

I definitely have grown to love Dan a lot.

He's nearing a fatherly figure in our life, but he gets home really late.

His mind is always on the deli.

At least twice a week,

my mom calls me because Dan was supposed to come home for dinner

and instead he's still at the deli.

"His good heart and caring nature has won her over,

but Dan's gruff exterior and addiction to his deli

has caused one too many issues in their relationship

and Cara is one foot in and one foot out."

-Now that makes more sense. -Yeah. There we go.

[Cara] He's so busy at the deli that he can't change his clothes

and shave his face.

[Jonathan] "Some people use hair products to tame their mane."

"Dan uses his own saliva."

[Bobby] Ew!

[Jonathan] Hot!

I hope he does it after he brushes his teeth.

Does he, like, overproduce saliva?

'Cause you need a lot of saliva.

-[Jonathan] I do think-- -He uses his saliva.

Why are you all acting like that's normal?

That's nasty as hell.

[Cara] I've only taken Dan to one work event.

He was late,

and then he was wearing all of his deli clothes,

and I was like, "I am the new CEO at this job,

and you are late, and you have not dressed up."

And he promptly sat down in one of the chairs

and fell asleep.

That didn't go well.

There's just moments I need to know I can count on him

and that the deli isn't gonna win.

Hey, Regis, did salt go up?

[Dan] I know I'm in a toxic, codependent relationship with the deli.

If I were Samson, the deli's my hair.

There's this sort of sense of frustration

where you just say, "Is this all I have?"

"Is this all I'm meant to do,

is come to this place and never smell the roses

and never take a break?"

[Cara] There is a real feeling that something has to give.

We love Dan, and we love the deli,

but we know that he deserves to invest in himself a little bit.

"Madeline wants the Fab Five to help shape up Dan

to be the boyfriend he needs to be for her mom

and help him end his codependent relationship

with his deli."

Our mission this week is to turn Deli Dan into Cara's dream man!

-Yeah! -Yeah!

That's cute!

♪ Things just keep getting better ♪

♪ Down in New Orleans ♪

[upbeat music plays]

-[Jonathan] I am hungry. -[phone rings]

-[Jonathan] Snacks. -[Karamo] Oh wow!

Stein's. Can you please hold?

[Karamo] Ooh, it smells good.

-Hi. -[Karamo] What does Dan look like?

-[Bobby] Oh man. -That him?

Yeah, yeah.

All right. I got a caprese with one ounce of prosciutto.

[Jonathan] Look at that little picture. He's got a lot of personality.

[Bobby] That's also him. Look at this.

-[Karamo] Oh my gosh. -[Jonathan] Oh God. He's George Costanza.

Can you take me off speakerphone? I can't hear a thing you're saying.

Dan.

[Bobby] I don't know. Maybe we should come back later.

[whistling]

[Jonathan] When I was little, if I had, like, a huge crush on someone,

I would just ignore them because I didn't know what to do

and I was really nervous.

So maybe this is just a case of, like, Dan-Stein's-in-love-with-us nerves.

-Can I help you? -Honey, yes. I worked up an appetite.

This place is gorgeous, and look at your hazel eyes.

-I've heard they're lovely. -Okay. I wanna order something.

Can I please get an egg and cheese bagel?

-Double egg would be wonderful. -Do you know we're here to help you?

-Yes. -Hi!

-You could help me by placing an order. -But you're so attractive.

-Wow! -Could I have this cookie, please?

[Tan] I wanna make it really clear none of us have money.

Fine. I'll put you on account.

You're getting a great review on Yelp from me, honey.

This is top tier.

I'm looking forward to that Yelp review.

Dan Stein would not have made it past episode one of America's Next Top Model,

not because he's hot. Because he doesn't know how to smize.

Where's your internal…

That's how Tyra does it. Come on, Dan Stein!

I would not like anything to eat.

The only thing I'd like is to know more about you.

I can person the register if you're nervous to leave.

-No, I will-- -I used to work at McDonald's.

-I can do that. -Thank you.

[Antoni] How did a Philly man end up in New Orleans?

[Dan] I used to be a lawyer. That's where I got my first legal job,

and I stayed down here 'cause I felt comfortable.

Are you open seven days a week?

-No. Six days. -Okay.

-Are you here seven days a week? -Oh yeah.

[Tan] Wow.

Do you feel you can't leave the business because they need you

or you just like being here all the time?

It's probably some of the former, but mostly the latter.

-Look at that quad. -[Tan] Look at that action.

[Dan] Yeah, I've got a good base.

[Antoni] Makes me curious about what your home is like.

-Are you ready to show us your house? -[Dan] I am ready.

-I am ready for you to leave my deli. -[Jonathan] Let's go! Yes.

[Jonathan] Show us your home.

[Antoni] Let's see inside. Is it as cool as the deli?

-Uh, no. -[Antoni] Oh. Oh.

All right.

-Whoa! Massive kitchen. -[Bobby] It's nice!

[Karamo] It's beautiful.

[Bobby] Doesn't seem like anyone lives in it.

[Dan] I mean, that's a good way of putting it.

Your girlfriend doesn't come over.

That is correct.

-[Tan] Do you invite her? -[Dan] Uh, no.

By the time it's like, "Let's get together on a weeknight,"

it's 11:00 or 11:30, I'm leaving.

-[Bobby] So it's a booty call. -She's already in bed.

It's not a booty call.

We… we snuggle.

[laughs]

[Bobby] And now is this living room?

[Dan] Not much living done in this room.

[Tan] It feels like you haven't quite moved in yet.

-How long have you been here? -Uh, probably, like, five or six years.

Huh.

[Dan] I don't spend a lot of time here.

[Tan] You don't spend time because it's like this

or you choose to keep it like this so you don't have to?

I think it's the chicken and the egg.

[Bobby] There is so much personality going on with Dan,

with the paintings of himself, the photos of himself all over the deli,

but then you get to his house and…

no personality.

[Antoni] Whoa, this is huge up here.

This is lovely!

[Antoni] Out of seven nights, how many nights do you spend at Cara's versus here?

Right now, seven.

We sleep in the same bed at night, and that's about it.

I think she wants a little bit more out of the relationship.

-Do you want more out of the relationship? -Sure.

[Dan] This is the bathroom.

[Karamo] What's interesting for me is you have these double sinks,

and one of them is empty

because no one ever comes here.

[Dan] That's correct.

-[guys] Hi! -Oh!

[Bobby] Hello.

[Tan] Are you Cara?

Aren't you a vision?

Well, thank you.

-[Dan] When am I getting a hug? -Kiss him! Kiss him!

[Jonathan] Aw. Tell us about Dan, honey.

Oh my gosh. He's like an enigma.

Like, I can find somebody who dresses well

and someone who has, like, good Southern manners,

but to find someone with a big heart

who leads every day and every moment with how can he help others,

it's DNA.

-He's got a super big heart. -[Cara] Yeah.

What does he need help with?

Balance is almost too gentle of a word.

I'm an independent woman, but I'm not so independent

that I wanna be alone on Friday and Saturday nights, right?

And makes me feel… sometimes disrespected almost.

He's giving cake to the deli, and you're getting crumbs.

-[Cara] Right. -Yeah.

[Tan] Have you tried to resolve it?

Have you spoken about it? Dan, what has been the outcome of it?

She's told me a couple things, and I've tried to do better.

[Tan] I can tell that Dan was raised right.

He knows that this kind of behavior is not okay.

Something is wrong here.

Can I go to the bathroom?

-Yes, please. -Yeah!

To investigate your situation. Not to, like, blow it up.

Oh, no, please.

Bye.

[Cara] Love y'all.

[Tan] All right.

He says that he doesn't dress up, but he's got a load of ties.

[gasps]

Oh my!

Naughty, naughty Dan.

Hey, Jackie. I need to show you something.

-[Jonathan] Okay. -Turn around.

-[Tan] Oh! -Ooh! Ah!

[Tan] Does that not hurt?

Can I go harder?

-[Jonathan] Ow! -Ay! [laughs]

Not too hard. Don't start too hard.

Go. You can go slightly harder.

-Ow! That stung, you bitch! -[both laugh]

-[Dan] First of all, where are we? -We're in your kitchen.

[Dan] I have a kitchen?

-[Antoni] You don't cook here very much? -No.

It's time to get the ingredients together, to plan.

There's so many interesting opportunities for you and Cara to bond over

that I feel like you're not taking advantage of

that I really kinda wanna hone in on.

You mentioned that you spend a lot of time at her house.

Do you remember the last time when, like, she came over here

and you were in the kitchen making something for her to eat?

-No. -[Antoni] Okay.

-So-- -'Cause it never happened.

Would you wanna change that and try something different?

You know, it kind of pains me that I've never thought of that until now.

When you know better, you do better.

Right.

[Antoni] That's all that we can do in life.

I just wanna say that when I look deep into your eyes,

I see my grandfather's eyebrows,

and that makes me feel at home and comforted and nice.

-They're very big. -[Jonathan] We'll trim them.

-Thank you. -Can I see your hair?

Please.

Wow, that's nice, thick hair.

You have great hair.

You have a great canvas to work with.

I care less about, like, the correct order to apply things

and how it makes you look.

I care more about the way that you feel.

And, to me, like, beauty, skincare, haircare, body care,

all of those things, it's like an avenue

for you to explore your relationship with yourself.

Let's just fill up our own cup a little bit,

and this can be an avenue for you to fill up your own cup.

We have a closet of really boring, "It is what it is. I throw on something."

Then you have this, which is actually kinda great.

There's stuff that anyone would feel nice in,

but by all accounts, you never wear this.

-That's correct. -Is it because you don't care anymore?

Is it because you're exhausted,

and you just think, "Well, I'm working all the time."

"It doesn't matter"? Give me the honest answer.

-I used to be more of a preppy guy. -[Tan] Okay.

And the occasions to wear said stylish clothing,

it's not that I don't care, although that's probably…

But I care relatively less.

I dress like this to dinner,

and I know Cara would probably prefer that I not do that.

Is it because I need to show you how you put a look together?

Is it because you don't have clothes that fit that make you feel good?

What is it?

All of the above.

I just want you to have a wardrobe

that makes it clear to Cara that you care about her.

She deserves that, no?

[Dan] Yes.

Or no, I don't know.

[laughs] She deserves that, yes.

I wanna know a little bit about what was growing up like for you?

Oy! Um…

I guess I didn't have a lot to be super proud of.

You know, I was, like, the runt of the… of the litter.

How do you think that messaging still plays in your life today?

Since I lack a certain measure of self-esteem,

I tend to gravitate to areas where I feel comfortable.

I mean, working at the deli,

that's created the self-esteem that I feel comfortable with right now.

So I heard from some of the people who work at the deli,

we heard from Cara,

and it's this over-general sense

that either people think of you as the most amazing guy

or an asshole.

Doesn't really bother me that much.

There's enough people that like me that I'm like,

if they didn't get the right read on me the first time, in time they will.

[Karamo] I kind of don't believe that.

You say, "I don't care that people say these things,"

but then also you have low self-esteem.

I don't… wanna be known as an asshole,

but I don't…

I know that enough people think of me and think--

-Can we stop at that first part? -Yeah, please.

"I just don't wanna be known as an asshole."

-[Dan] Sure. -Just say that.

I don't wanna be known as an asshole.

Half the people get this guy that's, like, abrasive and tough

and, like, maybe standoffish,

and other half get this sweet, loving guy.

I actually don't believe that both guys are you.

Mm-hmm.

I believe that one guy is a protection, and the other guy is who you really are.

-I think that's what we gotta figure out. -Yes.

And why would you like to figure that out?

'Cause I'm sure it'll help me grow in some respect. [chuckles]

-[Tan] Do we know what to do? -[Bobby] I do.

-[Karamo] Yes. -[Tan] Great.

-Do you know how to twerk? -[gasps]

-No. -I'll show you.

Lesson number one.

[Tan] Don't you dare break the counter!

[Jonathan] You can even do a little…

-My gosh. -[Karamo] Cross, like that.

I bet this wasn't part of how you thought this was gonna go.

-[Karamo] It's lower back. -Crawl up here.

-You really want me to do a twerk? -What's it worth to you?

There you go. Put your hands here. Yes!

-Up! -Up!

I haven't seen such bad twerking since Tina Belcher.

Yes! Yes!

Gorgeous.

Who knew Dan had moves?

[Tan] Yeah!

They're not great moves, but Dan got moves!

-Yes! -[Jonathan] Right here.

-You gotta pop it up. -Give me a dollar!

This is gonna be a week.

He does grow on you.

[laughing]

♪ I can feel it when you're near me ♪

♪ Don't come too close to me ♪

♪ You see this ring on my left hand? ♪

♪ We can never be ♪

[Tan] I want Dan to turn up and be an active partner with Cara.

I want him to feel a lot more refined and sophisticated

for the refined and sophisticated woman he has.

[Karamo] If you wanna be a successful businessperson, great,

but you have to attend to the other areas of your life.

Otherwise, you'll end up being a grumpy old man.

Hi, Dan.

[Bobby] I really wanna make his home

somewhere that Cara wants to spend the night.

I want them to start sharing more aspects of their life together.

[Antoni] I want Dan to show up for Cara

the way he's been showing up for his business.

I need Dan to realize that I'm sure Cara would appreciate every once in a while

to have a nice home-cooked meal.

[Jonathan] My hope for Dan is that he can unfurl his fist

holding on to that kind of gruff-guy persona

and move on with some hope and some love in his heart

that he can share with Cara and, most importantly, himself.

-[inspirational music plays] -♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ Did the summer never stop? ♪

[Tan] When Cara invites you to an event,

do you think, "I should dress up for that thing"?

Uh, it probably doesn't occasion me at first.

When we went to Nashville together, she's like,

"We have to set aside a night for us to make sure that we have your stuff."

Am I making you wince?

You're 50.

-49.9. -Okay, close to 50.

How is it that we've got to this place where your girlfriend has to tell you,

"Hey, pack appropriately"?

Because I haven't really gone with a girlfriend

as opposed to going out--

My question is this. You turn up to the event.

-Cara walks in looking like a vision. -[Dan] Yeah, exactly.

And then you stand there like…

-Uh… -[chuckles] That's pretty much… Yeah.

But that happens once.

Is there a learned moment, or a moment for learning,

thinking, "I can't let that happen again"?

It goes away, unfortunately.

Maybe what I need you to do going forward is actively tell yourself,

"I need to do more for her."

My relationships haven't really gone this deep.

This is my shot, you know, at 50.

No way you have a successful business without thinking ahead.

Treat her as an extension of your entrepreneur mind.

You wanted to see success in the deli, you got there.

If you want success in a relationship, you know how to get there.

Gotcha. No, you're right.

I want Dan to really start to realize

that he has to be an active participant in this relationship.

Now, are you open to trying on anything I want you to try on?

-[Dan] Yes. -I've got this wonderful crop top.

-You're gonna look amazing in it. -[Dan] That's fine.

I just need him to make a little bit of effort with Cara,

and it's gonna make all the difference to her and their relationship.

-[Tan] Can I see? -Yes.

-Whoo-hoo! -Would you like me to get my baseball cap?

Definitely don't want your baseball cap. You really have such lovely hair.

-Thank you. -I can't believe you hide it away.

[Dan] I like it a lot. I like the way it fits.

Maybe the color being a little bit more stronger…

Would you like a poppier color?

My whole thing used to be everything was classic and simple,

and then the tie would--

-One pop. -Pop.

The cuffing, that seems… That's like…

Are you gonna teach me how to do that?

I mean, yes. It's really simple.

So all we're doing is three rolls, and then it makes it look more fitted.

It looks like that person's actually styled out their outfit.

I wanted to get you a version of a sneaker that isn't exactly a sneaker

that you could wear to dinner

and Cara thinks, "He's made an effort. He has put in thought."

-[Dan] "He's made an effort!" -[Tan] Yeah!

[Dan] The shoes are actually growing on me.

You've got a smile on your face, complementing the look.

This was not you yesterday.

I agree.

Great. Okay.

The next look is already set up. Please give that a go.

-But so far, so good. -[Dan] Okay.

-Yeah. -[Dan] Thank you.

[Tan gasps]

You all right?

No, I'm not.

-I like. -You look hot.

I like. I like the blue.

I saw this color, a version of this color, in your suit jacket

that I'd hoped were gonna work lovely with your hair.

It's super chic, but also quite casual.

It's a denim shirt.

If you were to take the jacket off, it's still perfectly appropriate,

but it is still casual.

I have never worn a shirt that…

-A tunic, yeah. -What's it called? Tunic?

-A tunic shirt, yeah. -Got it.

[Tan] The detail makes it more interesting than a regular chambray shirt.

It looks very much like the man that you are,

which is successful, sophisticated.

We've just made it a casual version

so it doesn't feel like you're dressing up as your dad.

That's funny 'cause I guess at this point,

I'm, like, the age of my dad when I thought of my dad as my dad, so…

I wonder if he dressed as stylishly. Did he?

Uh…

No comment.

[laughs]

That's a no!

[Tan] The way Dan is carrying himself, it is clear he knows how good he looks.

Ever since I got to know Dan,

he's not held himself in a posture

that feels appropriate for a successful man.

And for the first time,

I'm seeing who he could potentially be going forward.

-Thanks for being open. -[Dan] I just wanna be lovely.

You are lovely!

[upbeat dance music plays]

-Hello. -[woman] Hi!

-You must be Madeline. -Madeline.

Hi. Catherine.

-Hi. -How are you doing?

-I'm good. -Thank you for coming. Take a seat. Come.

I brought you both here because I needed to learn more about Dan.

When we were meeting him,

I realized that Dan can be a bit of an asshole.

-Yeah. -Yeah.

-[Karamo] And… -I'd say.

But on the flip side, everyone's like, "He's an amazing guy."

Yeah.

And what I really need to understand is, like, is this behavior at the deli

or does this affect his personal life with friends, family, your mom?

I mean, I think for both of us,

we'd say we've had a few tough circumstances with Dan

over the years.

So this is definitely something that's at home and not just at the deli.

[Karamo] I don't think Dan really understands how his grouchy behavior

is affecting his life.

So there's no better people to, like, really wake him up

than his nominators, Cara's daughters.

-[Catherine] Hi. -Hi!

[Karamo] The first time you've seen each other.

[Karamo] It's so important that Dan hears this

because, in Dan's mind, he thinks everything's okay in his personal life.

So I wouldn't be here if I wasn't totally team Dan, right?

But the first… the first few years,

I really wasn't the most supportive of y'all's relationship.

I gotcha.

Did you know that she felt this way for all those years?

[Dan] No.

-You didn't? -[Dan] No.

How do you think the relationship with him and your mom could be better?

I would say, be more, like, consistently authentic.

[Madeline] Yeah. Reliable, right?

She doesn't know who she's meeting, Dan the deli man or Dan the boyfriend.

It's just day-to-day pending.

[Karamo] Yeah.

[Madeline] I think she wishes that she had someone

who she could be a bit more vulnerable with.

I don't think he knows a lot of things about her life,

and it's just simply because he's not there.

[Karamo] Got it.

[Madeline] You know, he's coming home at 10:00, she's asleep.

Unfortunately, they just don't have that ability to connect

whenever they're just kind of meeting in passing.

Got it. Well, this helps because I came up with a little game!

[vocalizes]

[both chuckle]

I came up with questions that I asked your lady.

[game show music plays]

So are you ready to play this game?

[laughing]

What is Cara's favorite candy?

-I'm drawing a blank on her favorite. -[Karamo humming]

-[Karamo] Red ball. -[Dan] Yeah.

Now the reason I have this here is as a visual aid

for you to see, like, "what I know, what I don't know."

You're not helping my self-esteem issues. [chuckles]

How does Cara like her tea or coffee?

Tea, not coffee. She likes it with a lot of milk.

-[Madeline] Yeah! -Boom. We'll go for that.

-Ladies, yes? -Yeah, that was good!

Can we start asking them questions?

[Karamo] Yes, exactly.

What's her most prized possession?

Her artwork?

[imitates buzzer]

-Her teddy bear! -[Karamo] Did you know there's a bear?

Yeah. Me.

[all laugh]

What sibling is she closest to?

-Give me a red ball. -[Karamo laughs] Okay.

-[buzzing] -[Karamo] What was her first job?

What is something she has always wanted to do but hasn't?

What would she consider to be her greatest strength?

-[buzzing] -What is she most proud about herself?

She's proud that she's been able to provide for her family.

-Yeah. -Totally.

-[ding] -We couldn't have said it better.

What is her love language?

Quality time.

-[ding] -You knew that one. Good job.

-Oh, I know it. -[laughs]

I don't spend enough time with her.

With this game, Dan can see he needs to pay more attention to Cara.

He's definitely spending way too much time at the deli and being late.

I think she wants somebody who's gonna be there for her.

It's what we always do.

A big thing that my mom and I talk about about y'all

is enjoying the little nothings of life.

She wants to hold your hand. She wants to watch movies on the couch.

-She wants to do the little things. -She sees you have the potential to do it.

-Otherwise, she wouldn't bother. -I know.

[Karamo] They want you to win,

but there has to be some acknowledgement so that the growth can start to happen.

-It's gonna take work. -[Karamo] Yeah.

-Are you willing to do that work? -[Dan] Yeah.

I feel terrible.

This was an opportunity for Dan to realize he has to do more work on himself

so that his relationships can flourish.

You never wanna know you've hurt people and that you have to make changes.

Changes is work.

I need you to go home, and I need you to write down

the ways that you've been impacting people negatively

and the ways that you can be better for them.

He's finally got it.

He's ready to do the work.

[Catherine] Bye, Daniel. Oh!

-We love you. We're rooting for you. -[Dan] Thank you.

♪ If I fall, are you gonna catch me? ♪

[Bobby] Your home itself, awesome.

But the thing that stands out to me the most

is obviously it's not really somewhere you live, right?

Correct.

But I want you to start thinking of it more

'cause I almost feel like it's an area in your life

where you haven't grown up yet.

Fair enough. Yes.

[Bobby] I wanted to take Dan shopping with me today to help him realize

that his home is not a place that feels like a home at all.

And if he wants to take his relationship with Cara to the next level,

he needs to be a fully formed, fully functioning adult.

And right now, he's not.

[Dan] My house is very sparse.

There's nothing I feel super proud of,

and I'm glad that you're helping me

because I'm looking at a bunch of stuff and I'm somewhat lost.

[Bobby laughs]

Coming home to a space that has had zero effort put into it

can't be a good feeling.

[Bobby] I was thinking two little chairs like this out on your balcony

for you and Cara to have when you come home

and just have your guys' special moment.

[Dan] These are nice.

-That table's kind of cool too. -[Bobby] Cool, right?

I figured you'd like that.

-It reminds me a bit of your deli. -Yeah, it does.

You've been doing this how long now?

-Fifteen years. -Yeah.

-[Bobby] And you were a lawyer before? -Yeah.

What made you decide one day, "I don't wanna be a lawyer anymore?"

My father wanted me to be a lawyer, and I wanted to make my dad happy.

And then, uh, I did private practice one summer.

I really didn't like it,

and, in fact, they were gonna give me an offer the last day,

and during the exit interview, I said, like, "I don't really like it here,"

and I didn't get the offer, and my father was pretty pissed.

My brother's a urologist at the Cleveland Clinic.

-My father's proud of him. -Your dad should be proud of you too.

He's… I don't know if he's as proud, but he's--

He doesn't… he doesn't hate me.

I think, you know, I have some self-esteem issues,

and a lot of my lack of self-esteem

has translated itself into my over-dedication to work.

Have you been looking for somebody

that you can kind of hand the reins to a little bit,

to where maybe you could focus more on your relationship?

Um…

I have not been outwardly looking.

So, for me,

what I see is you could get away from behind the counter

and doing the stuff that you're doing in the evening.

Yes.

I mean, that is actually one thing, is having some more front-hand work

so that I can do my other stuff.

[Bobby] I get where Dan's coming from.

I had stores of my own for years.

I worked there seven days a week,

and I lost my passions for anything else in life.

And eventually, I started to realize it was affecting not only my marriage,

but friendships as well.

I finally had to take a step back.

Do you think this making your house a little less Peter Pan

and more the grown-up, successful business owner that you are

will help your life and your relationship?

I do. I really think it'd be nice

to… to walk into a place which I'm like, "Damn, this is kind of cool."

-[Bobby] Yeah? -[Dan] Yeah.

♪ Once in a lifetime ♪

♪ This is once in a lifetime ♪

I had a chat with Cara,

and I wanted to get to know, like, what her very favorite things are,

and she was like, "Pasta alla Norma."

I wanna do something that's just, like, so out of the box

and drastic and different for Cara.

Yeah, that's great because, like, it's… Yeah, and I'm making eggplant.

-[Antoni] And it's unexpected, right? -Absolutely.

If you don't like eggplant, try a nice Norma sauce.

It's basically crisped-up eggplants in a very simple tomato sauce.

It's a wonderful vegetarian meal that's hearty, fresh,

and, most importantly, Cara loves it.

[Antoni] I picked up amazing ingredients, all from your deli.

[Dan] Okay.

So it's not lost on me that you have this wealth of product and resources

available at your very own deli to make amazing meals at home.

And I'm here to encourage you to do more of that.

Let's start with the eggplant.

I'm gonna ask you to cut these into rounds.

Probably about a half inch or so.

[Dan] Explain what that means.

-Okay, great. You want me to start? -[Dan] Absolutely.

Sorry. I'm assuming that you're super adept in the kitchen.

-You're assuming completely wrong. -Okay. Got it.

You can lead with the tip, then probably a half inch.

[Dan] This is more prep work than I've probably done in a long time.

When Cara cooks for me,

it shocks me how wonderful a meal she can throw together.

-[Antoni] She's a good cook? -Very good.

Oh, she made chili the other night

and, uh, just sent me with a little thing of chili

and some chips and stuff like that.

Isn't it nice to, like, show up

and, like, your partner just has everything ready for you?

Oh my God. That was wonderful.

It, like, feels good when you make something from scratch too.

-[Dan] Humble. -I feel like that's actually enough.

You've had enough?

No, I'm saying the eggplant.

-You've had enough of watching this? -[chuckles]

You're actually doing great.

I basically covered the entire surface area with oil,

and my goal is for these to get a beautiful golden brown.

I'm gonna get some of these Calabrian chilies out

and then ask you to chop them up.

They're gonna kind of, like, fall apart and disintegrate a little in the pan.

San Marzano tomatoes.

-[Dan] What am I doing exactly? -[Antoni] Breaking it apart.

We have your beautiful penne.

You can dump the whole thing right in.

So I'm actually gonna slide this off the heat.

I'm gonna gently salt the eggplant.

So I'm gonna go ahead and take all of this wonderful garlic and the chilies.

Beautiful.

As you're doing that, I'm gonna add a bit of dried oregano.

-We're gonna put the eggplant in there. -[Dan] Okay.

[Antoni] Go ahead and put that in there.

So we're gonna let that sit for a second.

Is that enough cheese?

That's definitely enough cheese.

-[Dan] Never enough cheese. -[Antoni laughs]

And you're gonna get the garnishes ready. Some basil leaves.

Cara's a big garnish person. She always says, "I'm cooking dinner."

"Do you have any basil at the deli? Are you…"

She actually… If she isn't growing it in our garden.

-Do you feel like she's the one? -Yeah.

-Really? -Yeah.

You seem more happy about that than me.

Because what's better in the world than finding your person?

Finding the person that makes you wanna be better.

-The one that makes you happy. -I like the way you just said that.

-"Makes me wanna be better." Yeah. -So what do you wanna do differently?

Like, we're here for a reason.

Uh, I mean, at this point, it's…

it's listen, and when I need to be there,

when she probably, you know, would like more time from me.

It's like… a nice, dramatic, if you will, gesture of love.

[Dan] Is this what she wanted?

This was the first thing that came out of her mouth,

and then she started listing a whole bunch of other things.

Can I have that list or no?

I'll write it down for you, but you should be asking her so you can surprise her.

Good point.

Remember to be creative

in figuring out ways on how to remind her of that.

Everyone wants to feel special. Everybody wants to feel loved.

-Delicious. -Wow.

-[Dan] I really appreciate you doing this. -[Antoni] Of course!

Thanks.

-You know exactly how to make this? -I got a book in the car.

-I'm gonna write it all down. [chuckles] -Okay.

[upbeat music plays]

♪ Ay, ay, ay, ay, ay, ya ♪

♪ Why don't you take control? ♪

♪ Try, ay, ay, ay, ay, ya ♪

♪ And be unstoppable ♪

♪ Yeah, you gotta shimmy, shimmy, shake ♪

♪ Oh, just like an earthquake, yeah ♪

♪ You know you gotta pay attention now ♪

[Jonathan] Get comfortable. Take a seat.

-[Dan] Smells great. -It's actually me that you're smelling.

-You smell great. -I'm kidding. Can I take your hat off?

-Please. -Okay.

The prognosis is great.

That's the first positive.

No, it's so good. Why are we covering up in a hat?

I never wanna see a… hat on you again.

Okay.

-[Jonathan] Do you get what I'm saying? -Yes.

-[Jonathan] We are gonna scrub your knees. -Wow. Really?

[Jonathan] That is an accumulation of dead skin.

Patty, I need some exfoliant.

Dan's knees are the color of a hardwood floor,

and I am just not understanding

why Dan's knees are the color of maple syrup

when no other part of his body is the color of maple syrup.

[Dan] How come this dead skin doesn't just fall off?

[Jonathan] One could be that you need to change out your loofah.

It could also be that you're just not spending enough time.

-[Dan] And it's called exfoliant? -[Jonathan] Yes.

If you use it once a week, it's gonna keep getting it off.

Come over here. I'm gonna wash your hair.

Feel how I'm rubbing this through your scalp, this oil?

-Yes. -It's really soothing for your scalp.

Especially for you 'cause you wear a lot of hats.

So is this a pre-wash?

[Jonathan] Exactly, it's a pre-wash oil.

Ooh, you know what you could also do for Cara?

You could do this for her and give her a little scalp massage.

And you guys could get freaky.

But pre-wash scalp oil is for external use only.

Understood.

There we go.

Hair hydrator.

-Do you derive your worth from your work? -Yes.

As a nonbinary bad bitch myself, I'm not into, like, this or that.

I don't think that you have to really change your priorities, like, so, so much.

I think you have to make room for both Cara, like, and your work.

But I think it's probably hard for you to do that

because, like, where you derive a lot of your self-worth is, like, your job.

Yes. It's definitely an issue.

Like, I heard her say something like, "You get home at 10:00. I need 7:30."

That doesn't have to be every night

'cause now if she's getting that no nights a week…

I mean, I'm a genius at negotiation.

You should be like, "I can give you 7:30 three nights a week,"

and she'll be like, "I'd love that," and you'll be like, "Great!"

No, you're right.

You know, understanding what the deli is for me

is trying to find another energy source that obviously involves Cara.

[Jonathan] We gotta get this language of love happening.

We gotta make some time in Dan's life

for him to be the man that Cara needs him to be.

-Its nose's go time. -Uh-oh.

-You got enough wax? [laughs] -[Jonathan] Yeah, I do.

One, two, three. Ah!

I'm exhausted.

The straights have worn me out.

Who's a cutie pie?

-Me? -[Jonathan] Dan is!

Thank you.

-I really appreciate this. Thank you. -[Jonathan] Oh my God. You're so welcome.

-Ready to see the new you? -I am.

All right. Here's the new Dan.

In three, in two, in one.

Here you are.

-Look at your knees. They're better, no? -Absolutely, they are. Yeah.

But look at your cute face.

I like it.

You do look noticeably more relaxed and, like, happier now.

Yeah.

[Jonathan] Just take that hour for yourself

'cause when you don't show up for yourself,

it's really hard to show up for another person.

And I want you to show up for Cara.

The little time I got to spend with her, I just adore her. She has amazing energy.

You know who else I adore who also has great energy?

This guy. And I mean, look at how handsome you are.

-Thank you. -[Jonathan] So let's go.

-Let's go. -Here's your hat.

If you put it on now, I'll come unglued in a way you've never seen.

Look how cute you look. It makes your pecs stick out more.

[Dan] Thank you.

-♪ Whoa, whoa, yeah ♪ -♪ Yeah ♪

♪ I'm ready to believe in you ♪

-♪ Whoa, whoa, yeah ♪ -♪ Yeah ♪

♪ I'm ready to believe in you ♪

♪ Whoa ♪

-[Antoni] Are you nervous at all? -[Dan] A little bit.

I'm actually nervous at how I'm gonna look trying to cook dinner tonight. [laughs]

[horn honking]

[Jonathan] They're here! He's here.

Let's do it. You ready?

-[Dan] I'm ready. -[Antoni] All right.

Oh my God! Look at you!

-[Karamo] You look so handsome. -[guys] Wow!

-[Karamo] And you know it! -[Bobby] You look ten years younger too.

Looks great, Jonny.

[Jonathan] Oh, you look great, honey.

You would've been proud of me this morning.

[Jonathan] I would've? I can tell.

Yeah, I washed the knees with the washcloth.

[Tan] You look so handsome.

-Thank you. -[Tan] Ready for this?

[upbeat music plays]

Wow.

[Bobby] What do you think?

[Dan] Wow.

This is night and day.

It looks wonderful.

This is…

-Move out the way. -[all laugh]

-[Karamo] I know! I wanna see it. -[Tan] Yeah.

[Bobby] I wanted to create spaces

where you could not only have moments with yourself,

but also with Cara.

A place where you can entertain, and this becomes a home,

and more, you know, the deli is less the center of your life

and just a stop.

[Tan] It's gorgeous.

It's so nice.

It's… Yeah.

-I wanna spend time here. -[Antoni] Wow.

Hey.

[Karamo] You didn't before.

-Oh, no. You saw before. -[Karamo] Yeah, we hear you.

-[Dan] It's very warm. It's welcoming. -[Bobby] You ready to see more?

-[Dan] Yes. -[Bobby] Okay.

Oh wow.

-Right? -Yeah.

Wow.

[Bobby] Before, in your house,

nowhere to entertain, nowhere except for the bed to cuddle.

-[Karamo] You see yourself cuddling here? -[Dan] Absolutely.

-[Karamo] You do know how to, right? -Oh yeah.

-Sure? I'm not sure if I believe you. -Yes.

[Karamo] I'm not sure. Wanna cuddle me just to show me?

Hi, I'm Cara.

[laughing]

-I just got off of work. -[Tan] The final test.

Oh my God!

-Yeah! -[guys] Oh!

You actually are a good cuddler. This is, like, very strong.

-[Bobby] You ready to see more? -[Dan] Yeah.

Oh wow. [chuckles]

It's wonderful.

[Tan] Whoa!

[Karamo] Oh, you painted the bed black. The tree!

[Bobby] The big, tall tree makes the ceiling seem super tall.

And also the chandelier.

[Dan] The chandelier is beautiful.

-Nice. -[Antoni] There we go!

-There he is. -[Tan laughs]

[Antoni] I, for one, didn't know there was a balcony.

[Bobby] Right? It had absolutely nothing on it.

Now it's a special little place

for Cara and Dan to go out and have alone time.

-This is so nice. -Yeah?

Yeah. This is so beautiful.

This is…

-Sorry. I'm a… a little… -[Bobby] It's okay.

A little in awe?

A little taken aback, yeah.

Just when you've been wandering into a place…

Like, it's one, wandering into five or six years,

you're just unaware or capable

of what you could possibly have done with the place to make it look like this.

-[Bobby] Yeah? -Yeah.

It's just… Yeah, this is really ******* great.

This is wonderful.

And obviously it takes somebody with your skill level

to be able to see and, uh… heal.

Do you feel this is a bit healing?

I don't know if the word is "heal." You know, it makes it…

You know…

Yeah. If things are inflamed, they're hard to touch.

If things are less inflamed, they're more approachable.

[Bobby] Agreed.

-You're the best, man. -[Dan] Thank you, Bobby.

-[Karamo] How you been? -[Dan] I'm all right.

Good. Good, good, good.

I made a big list of all the issues that Cara might feel

from the way that I have been acting towards here.

Causing her to feel-- or be alone when she doesn't want to be.

I make her feel less important than she should feel.

I raise her stress level because she cannot rely on me.

I'm not inflicting pain on her because I want to.

I hurt too.

Always.

And the best way for me not to hurt is to stay in my business.

Working in the store is my ibuprofen.

-And being at the store is my hot bath. -Yeah.

I appreciate you making me more aware of this.

-[Karamo] Yeah. -I do.

And I see a potential path to fixing the issues.

You are a pretty damn exceptional man

of how you love others and how you built something that's great.

I'm just so happy for you,

and for what's gonna happen and the steps you're about to take.

You can be a successful businessperson

without leaving the other areas of your life unattended.

This is where the growth happens.

Now he can start to change.

Oh! I really do appreciate you.

What's going on tonight?

-I'm… I'm cooking dinner. -[Antoni] Yes!

You know how to make the pasta alla Norma.

-Right? -Right.

But, when they get here, you have to have a little bite

to sort of, like, introduce them to your new home with.

I thought we could make bruschetta.

-[Dan] Okay. -[Antoni] Just a little different.

It actually has strawberries in it.

Got a beautiful Italian loaf and a baguette.

-And you're gonna drizzle… -[Dan] A little bit of the olive oil.

[Antoni] A little bit of the olive oil. Excellent.

So now you're gonna grab those two pieces and just put 'em right into that toaster.

We have some basil,

we have some parm from your deli, of course,

and we have a garlic clove.

Little bit of balsamic for some nice acidity.

Little bit of olive oil.

If you can mix that around, please.

This couldn't be easier.

Mm.

-So… -Are you gonna teach me table manners too?

[chuckles]

-I only have a week with you. -I don't know if you…

I probably don't come off, but I'm really appreciative of this.

-I'm trying. -Hug it out.

-[upbeat dance music plays] -Thank you.

-All right, kids, ready for this? -[all] Yeah!

[Karamo] Wow, mister!

-Holy shit! -[Bobby] Love this.

-Where's the runway? -[Tan] You can give us a runway!

You really are giving, like, young Brendan Fraser.

-I'm gonna rip his top off. -[Bobby] Yes!

-Yes! -Let him get past. His runway!

-Excuse me, sir. -There we go.

Oh my God.

[Tan] His pants bring out his ass. Like, he's got a--

[Karamo] I was gonna say the same thing.

[Tan] Sorry to objectify you, but isn't that nice?

-Didn't know you had a booty. -Apology accepted.

All right, thanks.

What is he wearing tonight?

-Shall we try on some other looks? -That is what I wanna see.

[Tan] Let's do it. Thank you.

-All right, kids. -[Bobby] Yes.

-Ready for date look? -Absolutely.

-Good. -[Antoni] Can't wait!

-[Bobby] Very dashing. -[Tan] Look how handsome he looks!

You're so adorable!

The brown because I wanted to bring out the beautiful color

of his hair and eyes.

The blue compliments the brown perfectly.

It fits you amazing.

[Bobby] What do you think Cara's gonna think?

Oh, she's gonna love it.

I mean,

compared to what she's been getting for, like, two years!

-[laughing] -How could she not?

He looks like a different man.

First of all, he's smiling so much more than he has before.

[Tan] He looks like a gentleman.

He's looking amazing. My loins are boiling.

-Tell us about the week, how you found it. -First, I wanna thank you.

I like this. This is great.

You found my look.

-I feel comfortable. -That makes me so happy.

Physically and mentally.

And then also, thank you all for the, uh, pep talks

in between the specific help.

[chuckling]

Um, they brought some issues up that I need to make myself aware of

and that I have been made aware of

and that I'm gonna try to… remedy,

starting with, you know, tonight when I, uh, take care of Cara.

I think what you have displayed is an extreme amount

of vulnerability, humility, and love,

and you are just a gracious man who deserved every bit of this week.

I do hope that you can take a little bit of time

to celebrate how far you've come,

celebrate what a great guy you are.

Cara's gonna be here soon. We should get out.

Uh, just get real nasty with her, you know?

[laughing]

-[Dan] Thank you. -Good luck, my friend.

[Karamo] You're welcome, man.

Just to let you know, and this is a pro tip,

you can still twerk in suits. Give it to me, Daddy!

-Give it to me, Daddy! -[Bobby] Johnny, you're missing this!

[laughing]

♪ Every day's a new day To find my way again ♪

♪ Rise and shine or do or die ♪

♪ I'm coming back home again ♪

♪ I've been lost in outer space Swimming through an ocean ♪

♪ Every day's a new day ♪

♪ To pick up the pieces And do it all over again ♪

[Dan] Who is it?

[Cara] It's me!

[Madeline] Oh my God!

-[Catherine] Oh my God! -[Madeline] Dan!

[Catherine and Madeline laughing]

-You look so handsome. -Oh my God!

I feel so strange.

-Aw! -[chuckles]

You look so…

Oh!

And looking fresh.

-Oh my gosh! -Dan!

Look at your house! Look at you!

-I know. -Look at your suit!

Let me give you a tour.

-[Madeline] Unbelievable! -[Catherine] It looks insane in here.

[Cara] I'm truly gobsmacked.

[Dan] Yeah.

-[gasps] -No! [laughs]

[Cara] Oh my… I'm…

Oh my gosh!

Catch me here. [laughs]

Oh, the pi…

Everything looks fabulous!

-You're slaying. -I'm slaying?

[laughing]

I'm slaying.

-We're moving to your house. -My house?

No, your house is still really nice,

but we can definitely come over here sometimes,

as long as I come home earlier.

Wait till you see my bedroom.

Oh my gosh!

-[Madeline] Daniel, this is swanky. -[Dan] Yeah.

Ladies first.

Oh my gosh.

Thank you, Daniel.

-[Cara] Wow. -[Madeline] The view! Oh my gosh.

[Catherine] It's gorgeous.

[Madeline] I hope that y'all just, like, sit out here,

drink a glass of wine, and enjoy each other.

Oh my God.

[Dan] All right, who wants what?

-The garlic rubbed on both sides… -That's what they told me to do.

So good. Really delicious, Dan. Thank you.

This is amazing.

-Cheers. -Kind of?

I've never had this many people in my room like--

-We're proud of you. This is incredible. -Thank you guys for making me do this.

Everything that was in you, we're seeing finally.

-We're actually getting to know that Dan. -Well, I…

But we wanna give you guys some time to talk.

[Catherine] Yeah.

Bring it in here.

[Catherine] I love you.

It's, like, a lot of hugs this weekend.

[Madeline] The most hugs we've ever had.

-So proud of you. -[mouths] Thank you.

-[Cara] We're alone! -[chuckles]

[laughs]

[Dan] We're having eggplant.

-[Cara] So you made eggplant just for me? -I did.

[Cara laughs]

-[Dan] Cheers. -Cheers.

-I love you. -I love you.

[Cara] That's delicious!

-It's, like, really good! -[Dan] Yeah.

-This is all really nice. -[Cara] Yeah.

[Dan] And this is great,

but, you know, I mean,

I, frankly, quite frankly, think it's gonna take more work on my behalf,

and they made me, like, realize,

"What do you think the impact is on Cara?"

It's, like, showing up late. Not giving her enough time.

Not being there when she needs.

I don't mean to hurt you.

-I know that. -[Dan] I know you do.

-I've always known that. -[Dan] I know.

I'mma try to be better.

Now you can make pasta,

and before you could only make reservations.

-I couldn't even make the reservations. -You couldn't even make reservations!

[both laugh]

I hope that this week we have really showed Dan

that there's so much more to life than work.

To really find happiness, you need a well-rounded life.

Here's to trying to be better.

I think you're pretty amazing, Dan Stein.

[chuckles]

[phone ringing]

[quirky music plays]

Stein's Deli. What can I do for you?

[Jonathan] Hi, yeah, I was wondering if you had any hot meat?

'Cause I went cold turkey.

Looking for some hot meat?

[laughing]

[Tan] Hi, Dan Stein!

Wow, what a nice button-up shirt.

You look pretty.

Hi… hi, everybody.

Why aren't you guys here? Are you afraid of me?

I was wondering why you're there because it's after 5:00,

and I think you should be spending time with Cara.

I have a date with her at eight o'clock tonight,

but I appreciate your concern.

[Bobby] We love you, and we're so glad you're doing well.

-Bye, honey. -It was good to see you.

-Thank you. -[Antoni] Take care of yourself.

I will. I will try.

I will try to keep doing it.

-He's so sweet. -Yeah.

[quirky music winds down]

[energetic music plays]

No time to iron your shirt?

Don't sweat it.

Steam it whilst you shower.

[disco music plays]

See? Perfect.

-Let's talk about me? -[man] All things… all things Dan Stein.

All right, well, why wasn't I talking about me before?

Talk about fashion?

I was watching the fashion channel last night.

[man] Were you really? Looking for inspo?

-[beep] …no. -[man laughs]

Uh, underwear, foo--

[man] We don't… we don't need to talk about underwear.

We don't have to talk about underwear? Why not?

[man] Let's talk about something I think you are gonna be more interested in, okay?

Have I been not interested in any of this other stuff?

Coffee from my coffee people?

That's delicious.

I get one though. You can't have more than one,

or else I'm gonna be agitated and pooping all day.

Want me to stand up on the chair and say that?

Or something like that?

I just, um…

What was the question?

[cheerful instrumental music plays]