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1
00:00:23,356 --> 00:00:25,775
Mr. President. I
found the TV remote.
2
00:00:26,108 --> 00:00:29,237
Good work, Sergeant. I'm
awarding you the Purple Heart.
3
00:00:29,403 --> 00:00:30,947
But I wasn't injured.
4
00:00:31,447 --> 00:00:33,115
Ow! (SCREAMS)
5
00:00:34,200 --> 00:00:36,953
Well, enough governing.
It's Saturday morning, damn it.
6
00:00:37,161 --> 00:00:39,580
Let's watch some cartoons.
7
00:00:39,664 --> 00:00:40,873
(GRUNTS)
8
00:00:41,082 --> 00:00:42,708
(CARNIVALESQUE MUSIC PLAYING)
9
00:00:43,125 --> 00:00:44,961
ANNOUNCER:
It's time to fall into
10
00:00:45,044 --> 00:00:48,839
the Futurama and Friends
Saturday Morning Fun Pit!
11
00:00:48,923 --> 00:00:51,968
Here comes Bendee-Boo
and the Mystery Crew!
12
00:00:53,052 --> 00:00:55,888
MAN: (SINGING) Bendee-Bendee-Boo,
what's wrong with you?
13
00:00:55,972 --> 00:00:58,975
You're such a lousy mascot
14
00:00:59,475 --> 00:01:05,856
No one understands a single word
you say not even the jerk in the ascot
15
00:01:09,443 --> 00:01:11,696
Rite my riny retal Rass!
16
00:01:14,657 --> 00:01:16,117
(OWL HOOTING)
17
00:01:20,204 --> 00:01:23,457
It sure was nice of your nephew
to invite us to his cloning lab
18
00:01:23,624 --> 00:01:25,251
here in the
Repeating Forest.
19
00:01:25,334 --> 00:01:28,170
Uh-huh. Hey, like,
here's a puzzler.
20
00:01:28,337 --> 00:01:31,424
How old are we on
a scale of 14 to 327
21
00:01:31,507 --> 00:01:33,301
(CANNED LAUGHTER)
22
00:01:33,718 --> 00:01:35,803
Did anyone else
hear that weird laugh?
23
00:01:35,928 --> 00:01:40,099
It's spooky. It doesn't seem to
correspond to anything funny happening.
24
00:01:40,349 --> 00:01:41,350
I'll say.
25
00:01:41,434 --> 00:01:43,060
(CANNED LAUGHTER)
26
00:01:45,896 --> 00:01:47,398
(BRAKES SQUEAL)
27
00:01:47,607 --> 00:01:51,694
Turn around.
Go away. Do it now.
28
00:01:52,361 --> 00:01:53,529
Rikes!
29
00:01:53,946 --> 00:01:55,990
Splinkies! What was that?
30
00:01:56,157 --> 00:01:58,534
I don't know.
It's a mystery.
31
00:01:58,784 --> 00:02:02,622
Like, I've got a bigger mystery. How
am I going to fill my hungry stomach?
32
00:02:02,705 --> 00:02:04,457
(CANNED LAUGHTER)
33
00:02:04,540 --> 00:02:08,002
Yeah. Where can we find
food here in the woods?
34
00:02:08,169 --> 00:02:09,962
How about that
kabuki theater?
35
00:02:10,421 --> 00:02:14,258
Like, where there's a kabuki
theater, there's a concession stand.
36
00:02:15,384 --> 00:02:17,011
(CANNED LAUGHTER)
37
00:02:18,846 --> 00:02:21,349
Say, Fry, why do you
always have the munchies?
38
00:02:21,557 --> 00:02:23,726
And also your eyes are
bloodshot, you're paranoid,
39
00:02:23,809 --> 00:02:25,519
and the van
has a skunky odor.
40
00:02:25,645 --> 00:02:28,856
Search me. No, don't.
I'm carrying. (LAUGHS)
41
00:02:28,939 --> 00:02:30,524
(CANNED LAUGHTER)
42
00:02:31,150 --> 00:02:32,652
(GROWLING)
43
00:02:33,319 --> 00:02:34,737
(ALL SCREAM)
44
00:02:35,613 --> 00:02:41,577
(LAUGHING) I do enjoy
a well-buttered floor.
45
00:02:42,453 --> 00:02:45,331
ALL: George Takei?
Reorge Rakei?
46
00:02:45,414 --> 00:02:47,375
Sorry to haunt
you so effectively.
47
00:02:47,500 --> 00:02:51,212
I thought you kids were that dragon
ghost that's been spooking the town.
48
00:02:51,587 --> 00:02:54,048
Like, what's the
story with the yakitori?
49
00:02:54,256 --> 00:02:59,303
Help yourselves. But I warn
you, that chicken is over a year old.
50
00:02:59,512 --> 00:03:02,765
(CANNED LAUGHTER)
51
00:03:03,599 --> 00:03:07,269
Why is the food in your
concession stand so old, Mr. Takei?
52
00:03:07,436 --> 00:03:11,023
You see, Amy, this used to be
the most popular kabuki theater
53
00:03:11,107 --> 00:03:13,317
in the entire
outskirts of town.
54
00:03:13,526 --> 00:03:17,780
But people stopped coming after
they built that darned basketball arena.
55
00:03:19,198 --> 00:03:22,493
Now everybody likes
basketball instead of kabuki.
56
00:03:22,702 --> 00:03:25,413
It's an insult to
my Japanese heritage.
57
00:03:25,663 --> 00:03:28,457
How so? This is
America, not Japan.
58
00:03:28,624 --> 00:03:30,543
Maybe so.
I'm not sure.
59
00:03:30,835 --> 00:03:33,212
Now, how many tickets
would you like for the show?
60
00:03:33,421 --> 00:03:36,298
Like, none. But thanks
for the yucky-Tori.
61
00:03:36,382 --> 00:03:37,383
(LAUGHS)
62
00:03:39,009 --> 00:03:42,221
Another grave
insult to my ancestry.
63
00:03:42,388 --> 00:03:44,056
(CANNED LAUGHTER)
64
00:03:49,854 --> 00:03:51,105
(DOORBELL RINGS)
65
00:03:52,481 --> 00:03:55,317
Is this the professor's
cloning lab? Nu?
66
00:03:55,568 --> 00:03:57,820
Cloning is a sin
against nature!
67
00:03:58,154 --> 00:04:01,157
But yes. Follow me to the
professor's cloning room.
68
00:04:01,574 --> 00:04:03,325
(MACHINERY BEEPING)
69
00:04:04,410 --> 00:04:05,953
You see, I'm his butler.
70
00:04:06,162 --> 00:04:09,999
Oh! My uncle Fry and
his mystery-solving friends.
71
00:04:10,166 --> 00:04:12,042
Perhaps you can
make sense of the...
72
00:04:12,168 --> 00:04:14,962
What is it that's been
haunting us, ZOIDBERG?
73
00:04:15,087 --> 00:04:16,672
Ghost.
(SCREAMS)
74
00:04:17,089 --> 00:04:19,467
Now then, let me
show you my lab.
75
00:04:20,551 --> 00:04:22,511
This is my
cloning machine.
76
00:04:22,970 --> 00:04:25,848
This is where I keep
various lengths of wire.
77
00:04:26,015 --> 00:04:28,851
And those are
the Harlem Globetrotters.
78
00:04:28,976 --> 00:04:30,811
ALL: The Globetrotters?
79
00:04:31,061 --> 00:04:33,272
What you doing' wearing'
an ascot, brother?
80
00:04:33,522 --> 00:04:34,982
I think it looks nice.
81
00:04:36,692 --> 00:04:38,319
(CANNED LAUGHTER)
82
00:04:42,865 --> 00:04:45,117
(SPLUTTERING)
83
00:04:45,242 --> 00:04:46,452
Ah!
84
00:04:47,286 --> 00:04:49,497
What are you Globetrotters
doing here?
85
00:04:49,622 --> 00:04:51,290
We're in town
for the big game.
86
00:04:51,373 --> 00:04:55,461
And we stopped by to help our friend,
the professor, with his cloning machine.
87
00:04:55,836 --> 00:04:58,589
Just call me the clone
prince of basketball.
88
00:04:58,672 --> 00:04:59,840
(CANNED LAUGHTER)
89
00:05:00,925 --> 00:05:03,052
(WHIRRING)
90
00:05:03,135 --> 00:05:04,178
(BELL DINGS)
91
00:05:05,054 --> 00:05:08,390
Like, it's basketball
superstar Larry Bird!
92
00:05:08,557 --> 00:05:10,810
Larry Bird, what
are you doing here?
93
00:05:10,893 --> 00:05:13,187
(TAPE RECORDER CLICKS)
Hi. This is Larry Bird calling.
94
00:05:13,479 --> 00:05:16,065
Listen, my agent sent me
that cartoon script,
95
00:05:16,273 --> 00:05:19,568
and I have decided I don't
want to be involved in any way.
96
00:05:19,652 --> 00:05:20,820
(TAPE BEEPS)
(RECORDER CLICKS)
97
00:05:20,903 --> 00:05:22,738
Nice to meet you,
Larry Bird.
98
00:05:23,072 --> 00:05:27,076
Okay, let's clone us
a whole team of Larry Birds.
99
00:05:33,791 --> 00:05:35,918
Now we can practice
for the big game.
100
00:05:36,043 --> 00:05:39,755
We figure, if we can beat five
Larry Birds, we can beat anybody.
101
00:05:40,005 --> 00:05:42,216
Cloning is wrong.
It's wrong, I say!
102
00:05:42,299 --> 00:05:45,094
Oh, I just hope that
mysterious dragon ghost
103
00:05:45,177 --> 00:05:47,179
doesn't show up
at the lab again.
104
00:05:47,429 --> 00:05:51,016
But why would a ghost want to
stop the Globetrotters from practicing?
105
00:05:51,141 --> 00:05:53,894
And against a team
of clones, no less.
106
00:05:56,438 --> 00:05:57,565
(DOOR SLIDES SHUT)
107
00:05:57,940 --> 00:06:02,319
Well, gang, it looks like we've got
more of the same mystery on our hands.
108
00:06:07,408 --> 00:06:09,118
(THUNDERCLAP)
109
00:06:10,411 --> 00:06:11,871
(ALL SNORING)
110
00:06:16,542 --> 00:06:20,462
Like, the real mystery is how I'm
gonna get any sleep with all this noise.
111
00:06:20,629 --> 00:06:22,047
I need some air.
112
00:06:22,423 --> 00:06:23,507
(SCREAMS)
113
00:06:23,591 --> 00:06:27,386
It's me, the dragon ghost.
We met before.
114
00:06:27,511 --> 00:06:29,054
Like, yikes!
115
00:06:29,597 --> 00:06:30,639
(CRASHING)
116
00:06:30,723 --> 00:06:32,349
(CANNED LAUGHTER)
117
00:06:32,850 --> 00:06:35,352
It's time to spring
into action, gang.
118
00:06:36,353 --> 00:06:37,688
Okay.
119
00:06:38,147 --> 00:06:41,984
Rabbit goes around
the tree. There.
120
00:06:42,484 --> 00:06:45,487
All right, it's time to get to the
bottom of what, at this point,
121
00:06:45,613 --> 00:06:47,990
can only be called
a mystery.
122
00:06:48,073 --> 00:06:49,116
Let's split up.
123
00:06:49,199 --> 00:06:52,745
Eight of us will stay here with
this dragon-trap the professor built.
124
00:06:52,828 --> 00:06:55,831
HERMES: Meanwhile, Fry,
Bendee, you go look for the dragon.
125
00:06:55,998 --> 00:06:59,585
Like, you guys are terrible friends
for always sending us to our deaths.
126
00:06:59,793 --> 00:07:01,962
I'm not going.
Re reither!
127
00:07:02,129 --> 00:07:04,006
Would you do it
for a Bendee Brew?
128
00:07:04,173 --> 00:07:06,967
Rokay. Ri'm a ralcoholic.
129
00:07:10,471 --> 00:07:11,764
MAN: (SINGING)
Yummy, yummy, yummy
130
00:07:11,847 --> 00:07:13,682
I've got love in my tummy
131
00:07:13,849 --> 00:07:16,185
And I feel like a-loving' you
132
00:07:17,728 --> 00:07:20,773
Love, you're such a sweet
thing Good enough to eat thing
133
00:07:20,856 --> 00:07:23,692
And that's just
a-what I'm gonna do
134
00:07:24,818 --> 00:07:28,280
Ooh, love to hold you
Ooh, love to kiss you
135
00:07:28,364 --> 00:07:32,368
Ooh, love, I love it so
136
00:07:33,869 --> 00:07:37,206
Ooh, love, you're sweeter
Sweeter than sugar
137
00:07:37,456 --> 00:07:41,043
Ooh, I love,
I won't let you go
138
00:07:44,880 --> 00:07:46,507
(CANNED LAUGHTER)
139
00:07:47,216 --> 00:07:50,260
All right, gang. I think we
have all the clues we need
140
00:07:50,344 --> 00:07:53,639
to solve the mystery of
the haunted cloning machine.
141
00:07:53,847 --> 00:07:58,143
Only one person took issue with
the ethical ramifications of cloning
142
00:07:58,352 --> 00:08:00,980
and also had access
to this castle.
143
00:08:01,271 --> 00:08:03,315
The butler, Dr. ZOIDBERG!
144
00:08:03,524 --> 00:08:06,902
Let's see who this
so-called butler really is.
145
00:08:09,905 --> 00:08:11,323
(THUD)
Oops.
146
00:08:11,407 --> 00:08:13,409
Never mind.
Here, take this.
147
00:08:14,410 --> 00:08:16,078
(CANNED LAUGHTER)
148
00:08:20,958 --> 00:08:23,168
(SPLUTTERING)
Ah!
149
00:08:24,962 --> 00:08:27,423
May he rest in peace.
150
00:08:27,589 --> 00:08:29,550
Hey, there's
a dragon in this trap!
151
00:08:29,883 --> 00:08:31,135
TAKEI: Help. Help.
152
00:08:31,301 --> 00:08:34,221
Let's see who this
dragon ghost really is.
153
00:08:34,430 --> 00:08:35,931
(SQUEAKING)
154
00:08:36,098 --> 00:08:37,599
ALL: George Takei?
155
00:08:37,683 --> 00:08:38,684
That's right.
156
00:08:38,767 --> 00:08:42,646
And I would never have gotten away
with it, regardless of you meddling kids.
157
00:08:42,771 --> 00:08:46,442
But, like, that dragon ghost
was hovering and translucent.
158
00:08:46,525 --> 00:08:50,362
Yes. You see, I used the
projector from my kabuki theater.
159
00:08:50,612 --> 00:08:53,032
But kabuki theaters
don't have a projector.
160
00:08:53,115 --> 00:08:54,283
Some do.
161
00:08:54,450 --> 00:08:55,826
It all makes sense.
162
00:08:56,035 --> 00:08:59,580
He knew that if he scared the Globetrotters
away from the big basketball game,
163
00:08:59,747 --> 00:09:02,666
disappointed fans would
flock to his kabuki theater.
164
00:09:02,791 --> 00:09:04,001
Of course!
165
00:09:04,251 --> 00:09:06,795
No, that's not why I did it.
166
00:09:06,962 --> 00:09:08,881
Then, like, why
did you do it?
167
00:09:09,214 --> 00:09:10,799
I'm mentally ill.
168
00:09:11,008 --> 00:09:12,634
(CANNED LAUGHTER)
169
00:09:14,178 --> 00:09:15,846
(CROWD CHEERING)
170
00:09:17,222 --> 00:09:19,475
Thanks for helping
solve the mystery.
171
00:09:19,641 --> 00:09:23,187
After practicing against five Larry
Birds, we're ready for anything.
172
00:09:23,395 --> 00:09:27,858
ANNOUNCER: And now, introducing
the opponents, six Larry Birds!
173
00:09:28,067 --> 00:09:29,735
(CROWD CHEERING)
174
00:09:35,324 --> 00:09:37,493
Bendee-Bendee-Boo!
175
00:09:39,828 --> 00:09:41,580
(ALL SHOUTING)
176
00:09:44,750 --> 00:09:47,336
What's all this ruckus?
People live here, you know.
177
00:09:47,586 --> 00:09:52,257
Mr. President, our children are fat
and dumb, and we blame cartoons.
178
00:09:52,382 --> 00:09:55,135
It's time to get
government onto our backs.
179
00:09:55,302 --> 00:09:58,263
We demand you regulate
children's programming
180
00:09:58,347 --> 00:10:01,850
and force the writers to
shoehorn in helpful lessons.
181
00:10:01,975 --> 00:10:04,311
Fine, fine. Get off my lawn.
182
00:10:04,394 --> 00:10:07,523
I'll have Agnew put
in a call to Hollywood.
183
00:10:09,024 --> 00:10:10,442
(DIALING)
184
00:10:10,526 --> 00:10:13,445
(GROWLING)
185
00:10:14,696 --> 00:10:17,199
All right,
let's laugh and learn.
186
00:10:18,283 --> 00:10:19,993
ANNOUNCER: And now,
the show that teaches kids
187
00:10:20,077 --> 00:10:22,037
to eat right and
have a good time,
188
00:10:22,121 --> 00:10:24,248
all while tolerating others.
189
00:10:24,373 --> 00:10:27,042
This will shut up
those whining hippies.
190
00:10:27,167 --> 00:10:30,212
ANNOUNCER: Stay tuned
for Purpleberry Pond.
191
00:10:30,504 --> 00:10:33,590
(SINGING) Purpleberry Pond is
fun for young and old
192
00:10:33,757 --> 00:10:37,052
When healthy juicy
purple-berries fill your bowl
193
00:10:37,219 --> 00:10:41,598
We all get along
and we're happy and merry
194
00:10:41,765 --> 00:10:45,352
I must get my hands on those
healthy purple-berries.
195
00:10:45,435 --> 00:10:46,436
Bort.
196
00:10:46,520 --> 00:10:49,982
Of eating right
we are very fond
197
00:10:50,065 --> 00:10:54,611
When we eat together
on Purpleberry Pond
198
00:10:55,195 --> 00:10:57,531
(READING TEXT ALOUD)
199
00:11:04,997 --> 00:11:09,835
Good morning, Princess
Purpleberry. Isn't it a lovely morning?
200
00:11:09,918 --> 00:11:12,838
It's particularly
purp-tacular.
201
00:11:12,921 --> 00:11:15,090
It's pur-practically
pur-perfect.
202
00:11:15,340 --> 00:11:19,761
It's funny how we never get
tired of the word "purple.” Never.
203
00:11:19,887 --> 00:11:24,892
And it's all thanks to a balanced diet,
composed of nothing but purple-berries.
204
00:11:27,811 --> 00:11:31,315
I must get my hands on those
healthy purple-berries.
205
00:11:31,773 --> 00:11:32,774
Bort.
206
00:11:34,526 --> 00:11:38,280
ANNOUNCER: Purpleberry Pond
will return after these messages.
207
00:11:38,822 --> 00:11:41,283
Hey, Mickey, you
seem kind of down.
208
00:11:41,450 --> 00:11:44,661
You should try some
sugar-blasted Purpleberry Puffs.
209
00:11:47,748 --> 00:11:51,835
My sugar-blasted purple-berries are
triple-soaked in maple-flavored syrup
210
00:11:51,919 --> 00:11:54,254
to start your day
with purple power.
211
00:11:54,421 --> 00:11:57,549
And the leftover milk
looks like Purpleberry Pond.
212
00:11:57,633 --> 00:11:59,885
(SLURPS) Ah!
213
00:12:00,219 --> 00:12:03,138
ANNOUNCER: Purpleberry Puffs are the
sweetest part of your complete breakfast.
214
00:12:03,305 --> 00:12:07,351
Along with juice, toast, ham, eggs,
bacon, milk, cheese, liver, waffles
215
00:12:07,476 --> 00:12:09,186
and a big horse vitamin.
216
00:12:09,478 --> 00:12:11,730
And now, back to our show.
217
00:12:11,980 --> 00:12:15,234
(SINGING) Healthy, healthy,
healthy Healthy purple-berries are
218
00:12:15,400 --> 00:12:19,655
Eat purple-berries
and you'll be a star
219
00:12:19,947 --> 00:12:23,242
Look, a new purp-son
is coming to Purpleberry Pond.
220
00:12:23,325 --> 00:12:24,910
(NEIGHING)
221
00:12:26,245 --> 00:12:28,580
Announcing Lord Loquat.
222
00:12:28,664 --> 00:12:31,041
I wonder what shade
of purple he'll be.
223
00:12:34,211 --> 00:12:35,212
(ALL GASP)
224
00:12:35,587 --> 00:12:37,547
Greetings,
Princess Purpleberry.
225
00:12:37,631 --> 00:12:40,676
I am Lord Loquat,
your new neighbor.
226
00:12:40,801 --> 00:12:42,594
You're coming
to live here?
227
00:12:42,761 --> 00:12:44,304
There goes
the purple-hood.
228
00:12:45,347 --> 00:12:47,975
(SHATTERS) You're
different, and I don't like you.
229
00:12:48,183 --> 00:12:51,353
Wait, it doesn't matter
the color of your berries.
230
00:12:51,520 --> 00:12:55,232
After all, it takes two
colors to make a rainbow.
231
00:12:55,607 --> 00:12:59,528
Shucks, I never thought of it
that way. Sorry, cheddar-head.
232
00:13:00,028 --> 00:13:03,115
ALL: (SINGING) Look up
high where the rainbow bends
233
00:13:03,573 --> 00:13:06,994
Orange and purple
are the best of friends
234
00:13:07,577 --> 00:13:11,039
I must get my hands on those
healthy purple-berries.
235
00:13:11,123 --> 00:13:12,124
Bort.
236
00:13:12,332 --> 00:13:14,543
And orangeberries.
237
00:13:16,378 --> 00:13:18,839
ANNOUNCER: We'll be back
after these messages.
238
00:13:20,757 --> 00:13:23,885
Mom, why is there orange
in my Purpleberry Puffs?
239
00:13:24,094 --> 00:13:27,055
As an active mom,
I care about these things.
240
00:13:27,306 --> 00:13:29,683
I'll check the box
while you start eating.
241
00:13:30,642 --> 00:13:35,856
Now my sugar-blasted Purpleberry
Puffs have Loquat-flavored orangeberries.
242
00:13:36,064 --> 00:13:38,608
Two colors? Wow.
243
00:13:41,737 --> 00:13:42,738
(BELCHING) Bort.
244
00:13:42,904 --> 00:13:45,240
It's a small part of
this girl's breakfast.
245
00:13:45,365 --> 00:13:46,575
Whoa, whoa! (SCREAMS)
246
00:13:46,658 --> 00:13:49,286
(SPLUTTERING)
(BOTH LAUGHING)
247
00:13:52,581 --> 00:13:54,541
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
248
00:13:55,334 --> 00:13:56,376
Bort?
249
00:13:56,543 --> 00:13:59,671
I have a plan to get my
hands on those purple-berries
250
00:13:59,921 --> 00:14:02,966
with new Loquat-flavored
orangeberries.
251
00:14:03,091 --> 00:14:07,596
Soon I will have an important
part of a complete breakfast.
252
00:14:11,058 --> 00:14:15,604
Oh, no. The Berry Burglar
fired his snowball bomb.
253
00:14:18,106 --> 00:14:20,525
The snow will destroy
the Purpleberry crop.
254
00:14:22,194 --> 00:14:25,238
Wait, it's not snow.
It's sugar.
255
00:14:25,322 --> 00:14:27,032
ALL: Yay!
256
00:14:28,033 --> 00:14:31,912
New sugar-frosted,
sugar-blasted Purpleberry Puffs.
257
00:14:32,120 --> 00:14:33,997
You can really
see the sugar.
258
00:14:34,122 --> 00:14:38,251
I don't know which I like
more, original or type two.
259
00:14:41,129 --> 00:14:43,924
ANNOUNCER:
And now, back to our show.
260
00:14:46,093 --> 00:14:50,305
Curses, I didn't get my hands
on those healthy purple-berries.
261
00:14:50,389 --> 00:14:54,976
But next time, by gosh, I'll get my
hands on those healthy purple-berries.
262
00:14:55,310 --> 00:14:56,395
Bort.
263
00:14:57,062 --> 00:14:59,481
Will the Berry
Burglar never learn?
264
00:14:59,648 --> 00:15:01,817
Probably not, but we did.
265
00:15:02,025 --> 00:15:05,570
We learned that no matter
whether we're purple or orange...
266
00:15:05,654 --> 00:15:08,490
Or new polka-berry.
(HONKING)
267
00:15:08,573 --> 00:15:11,368
Good nutrition is
just a bowl away.
268
00:15:13,328 --> 00:15:17,124
ALL: (SINGING) You know you
want to try it So tell your mom to buy it
269
00:15:17,332 --> 00:15:19,334
Buy Purpleberry
Puffs cereal.
270
00:15:19,668 --> 00:15:21,837
Buy! Buy! Buy!
271
00:15:22,170 --> 00:15:23,213
Bye-bye.
272
00:15:25,173 --> 00:15:26,633
ANNOUNCER: We'll be
back with more commercials
273
00:15:26,716 --> 00:15:28,844
after these
important messages.
274
00:15:31,847 --> 00:15:33,265
(FIRING)
275
00:15:40,730 --> 00:15:41,857
(SCREAMS)
276
00:15:42,232 --> 00:15:43,817
Go, me!
277
00:15:45,318 --> 00:15:49,906
(SINGING) They fight for the heck of it
because they like to, here comes G.I. Zapp
278
00:15:50,323 --> 00:15:52,909
G.I. Zapp, G.I. Zapp!
279
00:15:53,535 --> 00:15:55,454
ZAPP: G.I. Zapp
is the code name
280
00:15:55,537 --> 00:15:58,331
for an elite group of
heavily armed mercenaries,
281
00:15:58,415 --> 00:16:03,086
eager to murder the enemy,
regardless of the cost in innocent lives.
282
00:16:07,466 --> 00:16:12,012
Ah! Here we go. No one can
complain about this patriotic dreck.
283
00:16:12,095 --> 00:16:13,472
(MEN SHOUTING)
284
00:16:13,889 --> 00:16:15,056
(GROANS)
285
00:16:15,348 --> 00:16:17,851
What's that?
A rock? I hate rocks.
286
00:16:17,934 --> 00:16:19,519
(ALL BOOING)
287
00:16:21,146 --> 00:16:23,648
What do you stupid
voters want now?
288
00:16:23,732 --> 00:16:27,569
What possible objection could
you have to the G.I. Zapp cartoon?
289
00:16:27,736 --> 00:16:29,321
MAN: It's too violent.
290
00:16:30,822 --> 00:16:34,451
Oh! Very well. As
leader of the free world,
291
00:16:34,701 --> 00:16:38,413
it is my solemn duty to put
an end to cartoon violence.
292
00:16:38,622 --> 00:16:40,081
(FIRING)
293
00:16:40,248 --> 00:16:42,250
I'll have to
re-edit the program.
294
00:16:42,459 --> 00:16:46,296
Rose Mary, have we got any
type of machinery to edit tape?
295
00:16:46,463 --> 00:16:48,006
ROSE MARY: Oh, you know we do.
296
00:16:53,094 --> 00:16:55,847
Time for Dickie to get tricky.
297
00:16:56,681 --> 00:16:58,266
(MUSIC PLAYS)
298
00:16:58,350 --> 00:17:02,187
(SINGING) G.I. Zapp!
G.I. Zapp! G.I. Zapp!
299
00:17:04,856 --> 00:17:08,068
ZAPP: G.I. Zapp is the code
name for an elite group of...
300
00:17:08,193 --> 00:17:10,570
NIXON: Patriotic peacekeepers
who rebuild schools
301
00:17:10,654 --> 00:17:12,948
with their bullet-sucking
vacuum tanks.
302
00:17:13,657 --> 00:17:14,699
That's what they are.
303
00:17:15,033 --> 00:17:17,327
ZAPP: Today's episode,
"Operation throat..."
304
00:17:17,827 --> 00:17:19,621
NIXON: "Banana Split."
305
00:17:20,664 --> 00:17:22,541
What the hell kind
of plane is that?
306
00:17:22,624 --> 00:17:23,875
(BUCKLES CLICK)
307
00:17:23,959 --> 00:17:25,293
Okay, G.I. Zapps.
308
00:17:25,585 --> 00:17:28,380
Today's mission is to parachute
into Fort Weapons worth
309
00:17:28,463 --> 00:17:32,717
and take back our shrapnel laser,
which was stolen by our sworn enemy.
310
00:17:32,884 --> 00:17:35,554
The terrorist group
known as A.C.R.O.N.Y.M.
311
00:17:36,763 --> 00:17:40,141
KIF: "A.C.R.O.N.Y.M. A Criminal
Regiment Of Nasty Young Men."
312
00:17:40,684 --> 00:17:43,228
That's clever. I'll
leave that the way it is.
313
00:17:48,525 --> 00:17:49,943
(LAUGHING)
314
00:17:50,151 --> 00:17:55,115
I'll show those G.I. Zapps once and for
all when I fire this surface-to-air m...
315
00:17:55,198 --> 00:17:56,199
NIXON: Warning shot.
316
00:17:56,324 --> 00:18:00,203
Excellent plan, Profestro.
That'll blow them straight to he...
317
00:18:00,370 --> 00:18:01,371
NIXON: Church.
318
00:18:08,837 --> 00:18:10,005
Sound off as you jump.
319
00:18:11,464 --> 00:18:12,674
Freezer Burn!
320
00:18:13,842 --> 00:18:14,884
Nutcracker!
321
00:18:14,968 --> 00:18:17,429
NIXON: That's no name for a
woman. Let's just call her Pat.
322
00:18:17,679 --> 00:18:19,681
Waterboard!
NIXON: Helpful Johnny.
323
00:18:19,931 --> 00:18:21,766
Box-cutter!
NIXON: Powder Puff.
324
00:18:22,017 --> 00:18:24,853
Orphan Crippler!
NIXON: Nah. Pass.
325
00:18:29,399 --> 00:18:30,859
Incoming surface-to-air...
326
00:18:30,942 --> 00:18:31,943
NIXON: Telegram!
327
00:18:32,152 --> 00:18:34,321
Pilot, is your parachute
packed and ready?
328
00:18:34,404 --> 00:18:35,447
Yes, sir.
329
00:18:35,614 --> 00:18:37,198
Good, because
I forgot mine.
330
00:18:41,536 --> 00:18:42,954
KIF: Mayday! Mayday!
331
00:18:43,163 --> 00:18:45,457
Tell my wife... NIXON:
I'll be home for dinner.
332
00:18:49,878 --> 00:18:53,965
I... landed the plane safely next
to this naturally occurring fireball.
333
00:18:54,257 --> 00:18:57,344
At Disneyland.
Hi, Tinker Bell.
334
00:19:05,560 --> 00:19:07,812
Ready. Aim...
335
00:19:07,896 --> 00:19:08,897
NIXON: Negotiate.
336
00:19:18,198 --> 00:19:19,366
(GRUNTING)
337
00:19:19,449 --> 00:19:21,660
NIXON: Ugh!
Here comes a water balloon.
338
00:19:22,035 --> 00:19:23,286
(MEN GRUNTING)
339
00:19:23,370 --> 00:19:24,829
NIXON: That's quite a splash.
340
00:19:25,288 --> 00:19:26,373
(SCREAMS)
341
00:19:26,456 --> 00:19:28,500
NIXON: Uh, beam me up, Scotty.
342
00:19:28,583 --> 00:19:29,668
(GRUNTS)
343
00:19:29,751 --> 00:19:30,835
(SCREAMS)
344
00:19:30,919 --> 00:19:32,587
NIXON: Yay! I caught it.
345
00:19:36,091 --> 00:19:37,133
Ah!
346
00:19:37,217 --> 00:19:39,886
I'm hit. Oh, God, it...
NIXON: Tickles.
347
00:19:42,931 --> 00:19:46,267
Oh, no. Freezer Burn is...
NIXON: Sleeping.
348
00:19:46,518 --> 00:19:49,562
I will avenge him, you
heartless... NIXON: Bastards!
349
00:19:50,063 --> 00:19:51,398
It's okay if I say it.
350
00:19:51,815 --> 00:19:54,067
(GRUNTS)
(GROANS)
351
00:19:54,150 --> 00:19:56,069
NIXON: Just measuring
you for a new hat.
352
00:19:56,695 --> 00:19:58,488
Three, four, you-you-you.
353
00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:02,617
Find that apple.
It's down there somewhere.
354
00:20:10,166 --> 00:20:11,459
(SCREAMING)
355
00:20:11,918 --> 00:20:13,211
(POWER TOOLS WHIRRING)
356
00:20:13,294 --> 00:20:14,879
(GUNS FIRING)
(PEOPLE SCREAMING)
357
00:20:14,963 --> 00:20:16,840
That's it,
I'm pulling the plug.
358
00:20:17,090 --> 00:20:18,842
Agnew, cut to the PSA.
359
00:20:18,925 --> 00:20:20,260
(GRUNTS)
360
00:20:22,011 --> 00:20:24,806
Give me the ball!
No, give me the ball.
361
00:20:25,098 --> 00:20:27,225
I know, let's fight for it.
362
00:20:27,308 --> 00:20:28,977
(GRUNTING)
363
00:20:30,854 --> 00:20:34,482
Now, hold on there, boys.
Violence never solved anything.
364
00:20:34,774 --> 00:20:36,818
Then how do we decide
who gets the ball?
365
00:20:37,152 --> 00:20:38,695
Agnew, show them.
366
00:20:39,279 --> 00:20:40,905
(GRUNTS)
367
00:20:41,823 --> 00:20:44,534
There. How do you like
your stupid ball now?
368
00:20:44,617 --> 00:20:45,744
(LAUGHS)
369
00:20:46,119 --> 00:20:47,495
(SOBBING)
370
00:20:50,165 --> 00:20:52,000
(NIXON READING)
371
00:20:53,376 --> 00:20:57,130
ANNOUNCER: That concludes the Futurama
and Friends Saturday Morning Fun Pit!
372
00:20:57,213 --> 00:20:59,674
Now stay tuned for
six hours of golf.
373
00:20:59,758 --> 00:21:01,176
(GRUNTS)
28071
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