All language subtitles for Futurama S06E22 - Fry am the Egg Man

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:19,602 --> 00:00:20,895 (SCREAMING) 2 00:00:20,978 --> 00:00:23,689 FRY: Run, Leelal They're bouncing right at us! 3 00:00:24,023 --> 00:00:25,858 (ANGRY YELLING) 4 00:00:27,610 --> 00:00:29,153 (SCREAMING) 5 00:00:37,453 --> 00:00:39,247 So, anybody hungry? 6 00:00:39,330 --> 00:00:40,498 I could stuff myself. 7 00:00:40,706 --> 00:00:43,376 I'll use that free app that tells you what restaurants you're near. 8 00:00:43,584 --> 00:00:45,503 You mean the window? Yes. 9 00:00:53,928 --> 00:00:55,429 (HORN HONKING) 10 00:00:55,888 --> 00:00:59,892 I am Lrrr, ruler of the planet Omicron Persei 8! 11 00:00:59,976 --> 00:01:02,019 I demand extra dipping sauce! 12 00:01:02,186 --> 00:01:03,187 How many? 13 00:01:03,312 --> 00:01:04,313 I don't know. Two? 14 00:01:08,401 --> 00:01:09,777 Welcome to Fishy Joe's. 15 00:01:10,069 --> 00:01:12,238 Today is Stroganoff Thursday. 16 00:01:12,321 --> 00:01:15,074 We are currently out of the following menu items. 17 00:01:15,157 --> 00:01:16,325 WOMAN: Stroganoff. 18 00:01:16,409 --> 00:01:17,535 May I take your order? 19 00:01:17,660 --> 00:01:18,744 I'll have the Stroganoff. 20 00:01:19,745 --> 00:01:20,746 Okay. 21 00:01:20,830 --> 00:01:24,500 Yeah, give me the fried spaghetti dinner breakfast pocket for lunch 22 00:01:24,667 --> 00:01:27,587 and a big bucket of mixed sodas. 23 00:01:27,837 --> 00:01:29,130 One kids' meal. Got it. 24 00:01:29,505 --> 00:01:31,340 LEELA: Huh. Buggalo Tots? 25 00:01:31,424 --> 00:01:32,925 What exactly are those made of? 26 00:01:33,342 --> 00:01:34,385 You got a warrant? 27 00:01:34,468 --> 00:01:36,345 I'll just have something from the light menu. 28 00:01:36,429 --> 00:01:38,389 How about the gardener lover's salad? 29 00:01:38,723 --> 00:01:40,349 What kind of cheese filling you want in that? 30 00:01:40,516 --> 00:01:41,559 (GROANS) 31 00:01:41,642 --> 00:01:42,893 Just give me the fruit cup. 32 00:01:43,269 --> 00:01:44,770 Okey-doke. 33 00:01:44,854 --> 00:01:46,689 What kind of cheese filling you want in that? 34 00:01:49,817 --> 00:01:50,818 (SLURPING) 35 00:01:51,360 --> 00:01:55,156 Oh, God. Fruit is spelled F-R-O-O-T. 36 00:01:55,448 --> 00:01:57,783 And it's got quotation marks around it. 37 00:01:58,367 --> 00:01:59,368 Hmm... 38 00:01:59,910 --> 00:02:02,913 There's nothing wrong with a little fast food once or twice a meal. 39 00:02:02,997 --> 00:02:04,373 (WHEEZING) 40 00:02:04,457 --> 00:02:06,876 (GROANING) Heart attack. 41 00:02:07,585 --> 00:02:08,586 (GASPING) 42 00:02:10,963 --> 00:02:11,964 (GULPS) 43 00:02:12,131 --> 00:02:13,382 I'm fine. 44 00:02:14,008 --> 00:02:15,009 (CRACKING) 45 00:02:15,092 --> 00:02:18,387 Ow! I got a bone in my fruit! That's it. 46 00:02:18,679 --> 00:02:20,389 From now on, we're not eating anything 47 00:02:20,473 --> 00:02:22,933 unless we know what it is and where it's from. 48 00:02:23,059 --> 00:02:25,353 We're going to the local farmers market. 49 00:02:25,436 --> 00:02:27,730 Ah, Mom, do we have to? 50 00:02:41,786 --> 00:02:43,412 (CLUCKING) 51 00:02:46,874 --> 00:02:48,668 This is what I'm talking about. 52 00:02:48,918 --> 00:02:52,505 See all the dirt and earwigs? That's the sign of healthy food. 53 00:02:52,755 --> 00:02:55,424 You think that's healthy, try this. 54 00:02:55,508 --> 00:02:58,469 I found it growing at the bottom of my hamper. 55 00:03:00,721 --> 00:03:01,722 Mmm! 56 00:03:01,806 --> 00:03:03,349 So fresh and musty. 57 00:03:03,432 --> 00:03:04,767 MAN: It's what I do. 58 00:03:08,729 --> 00:03:10,189 Hello, tiny man. 59 00:03:10,272 --> 00:03:13,401 You want sample small-batch Amazonian maple syrup? 60 00:03:13,609 --> 00:03:14,694 Sure. 61 00:03:15,861 --> 00:03:16,862 (COUGHING) 62 00:03:17,279 --> 00:03:18,656 Mmm. Ah. 63 00:03:18,781 --> 00:03:20,449 That's the kind of sap I like. 64 00:03:20,616 --> 00:03:23,994 You the kind of sap I like. 65 00:03:24,078 --> 00:03:25,621 I'm scare-roused. 66 00:03:25,788 --> 00:03:26,831 (HUMMING) 67 00:03:26,956 --> 00:03:31,293 (GASPS) Zuban tobacco? The richest, most obnoxious kind! 68 00:03:31,711 --> 00:03:34,463 Listen, pal, I'm looking for a versatile smoke, 69 00:03:34,547 --> 00:03:36,716 one that's equally good in a crowded elevator 70 00:03:36,799 --> 00:03:38,050 or an audience with the Pope. 71 00:03:38,509 --> 00:03:40,553 Forget the Pope, my friend. 72 00:03:40,636 --> 00:03:41,887 Smoke one of these, 73 00:03:41,971 --> 00:03:45,933 and God himself will ask to be seated far away from you. 74 00:03:46,392 --> 00:03:47,393 Ooh! 75 00:03:48,144 --> 00:03:51,105 Heirloom eggs? That's so life-affirming. 76 00:03:51,480 --> 00:03:53,566 I'll bet you run your own hatchery, 77 00:03:53,649 --> 00:03:56,485 just you and your wife, Matilda. 78 00:03:56,944 --> 00:04:00,072 No, ma'am. Matilda and I gather them eggs in the forest. 79 00:04:00,156 --> 00:04:02,616 And Matilda's really more of a mongoose than a wife. 80 00:04:02,825 --> 00:04:04,034 You're a lucky man. 81 00:04:04,118 --> 00:04:06,537 But are they way more expensive than regular eggs? 82 00:04:06,871 --> 00:04:08,831 Way more. Ooh! 83 00:04:08,914 --> 00:04:09,915 I'll take a dozen. 84 00:04:15,838 --> 00:04:16,839 What? 85 00:04:18,966 --> 00:04:22,386 You're not my breakfast friends. What are you doing here? 86 00:04:22,511 --> 00:04:26,015 Leela blackmailed us all into eating healthy, organic food. 87 00:04:26,182 --> 00:04:28,642 Blackmail? What does she have on you? 88 00:04:28,809 --> 00:04:31,270 As long as we eat her filthy scrambled eggs, 89 00:04:31,353 --> 00:04:32,521 you'll never find out. 90 00:04:32,730 --> 00:04:34,148 They're not filthy. 91 00:04:34,231 --> 00:04:38,152 They're wholesome, fertile and fresh from the forest floor. 92 00:04:38,235 --> 00:04:39,361 There's some filth. 93 00:04:40,196 --> 00:04:41,864 "Fertile?" What does that mean? 94 00:04:41,947 --> 00:04:45,910 It means it will hatch into a tiny, little, infant creature 95 00:04:45,993 --> 00:04:47,369 unless we cook it first. 96 00:04:47,703 --> 00:04:50,080 Hey, Leela, hurry up with those scrambled infants. 97 00:04:50,372 --> 00:04:52,249 What? That's horrifying! 98 00:04:52,374 --> 00:04:54,668 ZOIDBERG, you're an inhuman monster. 99 00:04:54,752 --> 00:04:56,879 What are you, my driver's license? 100 00:04:57,171 --> 00:05:00,174 Eating a sweet, innocent chick before it's even hatched? 101 00:05:00,257 --> 00:05:04,261 Oh, no, you won't! I refuse to eat an unborn animal. 102 00:05:04,553 --> 00:05:07,890 I'm going to keep this egg safe and warm and secure 103 00:05:07,973 --> 00:05:10,142 until it hatches out into the world. 104 00:05:10,226 --> 00:05:11,685 And then I'm going to eat it. 105 00:05:12,269 --> 00:05:16,398 (MAN SINGING) Ain't nothing like a postcard coming from your own mind 106 00:05:16,607 --> 00:05:18,067 Your own mind 107 00:05:18,984 --> 00:05:24,532 Hey there's a toothache coming from your goldmine, your goldmine 108 00:05:27,743 --> 00:05:31,163 Why don't you come on over sometime 109 00:05:31,247 --> 00:05:34,667 And have ourselves a really good time 110 00:05:34,750 --> 00:05:38,170 Talk about whatever inside 111 00:05:38,254 --> 00:05:42,633 Trip into the egg man's mind... 112 00:05:52,017 --> 00:05:53,394 Should we turn on the TV? 113 00:05:53,477 --> 00:05:54,520 Nah. 114 00:05:58,440 --> 00:05:59,483 (COUGHING) 115 00:05:59,567 --> 00:06:01,819 Bender, do you mind? I'm roosting. 116 00:06:02,111 --> 00:06:05,239 I'm considering buying a yacht to house my thoroughbreds. 117 00:06:05,322 --> 00:06:07,908 How do you expect me to do that without smoking a cigar? 118 00:06:08,242 --> 00:06:09,827 Think of the unborn embryo. 119 00:06:10,035 --> 00:06:11,453 That's what I'm gonna call the yacht. 120 00:06:11,954 --> 00:06:12,955 (CLUCKING) 121 00:06:14,164 --> 00:06:15,624 Stop pecking me! 122 00:06:16,792 --> 00:06:17,793 Hey! 123 00:06:17,877 --> 00:06:18,878 (YELLS) 124 00:06:18,961 --> 00:06:20,754 Leggo my eggo, crabbo! 125 00:06:21,046 --> 00:06:23,465 Stop it, Fry. That's sexual harassment! 126 00:06:23,716 --> 00:06:26,844 Yeah, come down off your round, white pulpit. 127 00:06:26,927 --> 00:06:28,804 You're just going to eat that thing anyway. 128 00:06:29,054 --> 00:06:31,807 I was, but you can't sit on something for a week 129 00:06:31,891 --> 00:06:33,642 without falling in love with it. 130 00:06:33,726 --> 00:06:36,395 Whoever's in here deserves a chance at life. 131 00:06:36,478 --> 00:06:39,565 A chance to blossom into a beautiful young man, 132 00:06:39,648 --> 00:06:41,483 like I did as a baby. 133 00:06:41,567 --> 00:06:46,405 And so I make this solemn vow to do everything I can to make sure 134 00:06:46,488 --> 00:06:49,366 this wonderful, innocent creature 135 00:06:49,450 --> 00:06:52,578 enters this world happy, healthy, and... 136 00:06:53,370 --> 00:06:54,663 All yours, ZOIDBERG. 137 00:06:58,000 --> 00:06:59,001 (HISSING) 138 00:06:59,209 --> 00:07:00,210 (ALL GASP) 139 00:07:01,378 --> 00:07:04,340 Ah, look at the cute little... Aah! 140 00:07:05,007 --> 00:07:08,010 I was gonna go yachting in those feet! 141 00:07:13,515 --> 00:07:14,892 (HISSING) Oh! 142 00:07:15,017 --> 00:07:16,810 (GRUMBLING) Oh! Oh! 143 00:07:17,561 --> 00:07:18,562 Aah! 144 00:07:19,480 --> 00:07:23,108 Relax, you babies. It's no different from stomping a puppy. 145 00:07:23,609 --> 00:07:24,902 (GRUNTING) 146 00:07:24,985 --> 00:07:27,196 Everyone, stop! He's not going to hurt you. 147 00:07:27,404 --> 00:07:29,698 I'm standing in a pool of my own feet! 148 00:07:29,949 --> 00:07:32,409 Bender's right. Kill it before someone names it! 149 00:07:32,701 --> 00:07:35,079 No! Mr. Peppy just wants to be our friend. 150 00:07:35,162 --> 00:07:36,121 Oy! 151 00:07:36,205 --> 00:07:38,666 Look, I know he's ugly, and kind of corrosive, 152 00:07:38,749 --> 00:07:42,044 but we can't murder someone just 'cause he's hideous and annoying. 153 00:07:42,252 --> 00:07:44,964 That's what we said about ZOIDBERG, and look where that got us. 154 00:07:45,214 --> 00:07:46,632 Amy has a point. 155 00:07:46,840 --> 00:07:49,969 Mr. Peppy's not like ZOIDBERG. He's my friend. 156 00:07:50,344 --> 00:07:52,054 Aw... 157 00:08:07,820 --> 00:08:08,821 (DOGS BARKING) 158 00:08:12,032 --> 00:08:13,867 (WHIMPERING) 159 00:08:17,830 --> 00:08:18,831 (SIREN WAILING) 160 00:08:24,795 --> 00:08:26,922 (MOANING) 161 00:08:27,006 --> 00:08:29,299 Where to, adulterers? 162 00:08:29,466 --> 00:08:30,676 (GASPS) (BEEPING) 163 00:08:30,759 --> 00:08:31,844 Calculon? 164 00:08:31,927 --> 00:08:35,556 Then it wasn't your body they found in the harbor after the bomb went off. 165 00:08:35,806 --> 00:08:36,974 What bomb? 166 00:08:38,934 --> 00:08:42,312 It takes more than that to surprise me. Bender. 167 00:08:42,396 --> 00:08:43,397 (YELLS) 168 00:08:45,065 --> 00:08:46,608 What you doing, little buddy? 169 00:08:46,692 --> 00:08:49,862 Ah, yeah, Uncle Bender, he's your friend. 170 00:08:49,945 --> 00:08:51,447 (GROWLING) 171 00:08:51,530 --> 00:08:52,531 (SCREAMS) 172 00:08:54,116 --> 00:08:55,117 Huh? 173 00:08:55,367 --> 00:08:56,368 Oh... 174 00:08:56,452 --> 00:08:57,536 You want to play fetch. 175 00:08:57,619 --> 00:08:58,871 (PANTING) 176 00:08:59,538 --> 00:09:01,623 Come on, boy, get the ball. 177 00:09:01,790 --> 00:09:03,375 (GROWLING) 178 00:09:04,293 --> 00:09:05,335 (LAUGHS) 179 00:09:05,419 --> 00:09:08,047 Dumb jerk. Come on, get the ball. 180 00:09:08,714 --> 00:09:09,715 (YELLING) 181 00:09:10,841 --> 00:09:11,925 (EVERYONE GASPS) 182 00:09:12,009 --> 00:09:15,429 Sweet freak of Mozambique, that thing's colossal! 183 00:09:15,512 --> 00:09:16,972 It's gonna Kill us all. 184 00:09:17,097 --> 00:09:20,267 It's so huge. How big does one of those things get? 185 00:09:20,350 --> 00:09:23,187 Well, that depends on what one of those things is. 186 00:09:23,270 --> 00:09:25,272 That seems like a fact worth knowing. 187 00:09:25,731 --> 00:09:28,650 Good startling news, everyone. 188 00:09:28,901 --> 00:09:30,569 I found a description of the creature 189 00:09:30,652 --> 00:09:32,696 in this medieval monster manual. 190 00:09:38,660 --> 00:09:41,955 Just as I feared. Attack-type J. 191 00:09:42,164 --> 00:09:44,208 No! No! 192 00:09:44,333 --> 00:09:48,045 Yes! It kills its prey by sucking out the skeleton, 193 00:09:48,128 --> 00:09:50,422 leaving nothing but a puddle of flesh. 194 00:09:50,756 --> 00:09:51,965 ALL: Ew! 195 00:09:52,257 --> 00:09:55,594 Hence, the Latin name, Bonus vampirus, 196 00:09:55,677 --> 00:09:59,932 or as you non-Catholics would say, the bone vampire. 197 00:10:00,224 --> 00:10:01,350 Dios mio. 198 00:10:03,477 --> 00:10:06,605 That's ridiculous! Mr. Peppy doesn't eat bones. 199 00:10:06,688 --> 00:10:10,442 I raised him on a simple diet of Brussels sprouts and mixed soda. 200 00:10:10,526 --> 00:10:11,527 (GAGGING) 201 00:10:11,944 --> 00:10:13,445 At least there's only one of them. 202 00:10:13,529 --> 00:10:15,781 The good news is, they can't start breeding. 203 00:10:16,031 --> 00:10:20,786 The bad news, everyone, is, the beast reproduces asexually. 204 00:10:20,869 --> 00:10:22,454 A single bone vampire, 205 00:10:22,538 --> 00:10:26,708 left alone with some quiet music and some bone vampire porn, 206 00:10:26,792 --> 00:10:29,128 could produce dozens of deadly offspring. 207 00:10:29,461 --> 00:10:31,964 That lucky bastard. I say Kill it! 208 00:10:32,214 --> 00:10:34,049 But it loves me, and I love it! 209 00:10:34,258 --> 00:10:35,342 Kill them both! 210 00:10:35,425 --> 00:10:36,969 Killing them seems like a hassle. 211 00:10:37,052 --> 00:10:39,596 Can't we just set it free to live with its own kind? 212 00:10:40,722 --> 00:10:42,641 Poor, ignorant Leela. 213 00:10:42,724 --> 00:10:45,811 The bone vampire is now extinct on its home planet. 214 00:10:46,061 --> 00:10:47,688 (GASPS) That's perfect. 215 00:10:47,771 --> 00:10:51,441 We can reintroduce it to the wild and repopulate the species. 216 00:10:51,525 --> 00:10:54,111 Yeah, let's do those Leela things! 217 00:10:54,403 --> 00:10:55,404 (YELLS) 218 00:11:06,623 --> 00:11:08,917 Well, buddy, how do you like your new home? 219 00:11:11,128 --> 00:11:12,588 See, he's happy already. 220 00:11:12,880 --> 00:11:14,756 That thing doesn't have emotions, Fry. 221 00:11:14,923 --> 00:11:16,800 Its brain is the size of a walnut. 222 00:11:17,050 --> 00:11:19,678 So are walnuts, and they're delicious. 223 00:11:23,765 --> 00:11:27,394 I'll miss you, Mr. Peppy, but you'll be happier here. 224 00:11:27,603 --> 00:11:28,812 (MUTTERING) 225 00:11:28,896 --> 00:11:30,898 So, go on, go. 226 00:11:31,523 --> 00:11:33,650 Goodbye, Mr. Peppy. 227 00:11:33,734 --> 00:11:36,361 Come on, man, don't do this. 228 00:11:36,445 --> 00:11:38,071 Go on now. 229 00:11:38,155 --> 00:11:41,867 I mean it, don't make this any harder than it has to be. 230 00:11:41,950 --> 00:11:43,660 It's time to let go. 231 00:11:43,744 --> 00:11:44,745 Ow! 232 00:11:45,787 --> 00:11:48,957 Thanks, Leela, he just needed a little extra push. 233 00:11:56,882 --> 00:11:58,008 Come on, Fry, let's go home and... 234 00:11:58,091 --> 00:11:59,134 (BEEPING) 235 00:11:59,218 --> 00:12:02,137 Hold up, there's alcohol around here somewhere. 236 00:12:02,471 --> 00:12:04,723 My Tanqueraydar IS going crazy. 237 00:12:05,265 --> 00:12:06,225 (BEEPING GETTING FASTER) 238 00:12:06,308 --> 00:12:07,351 Ha, ha. 239 00:12:07,643 --> 00:12:09,728 Thought you could get away from me? 240 00:12:09,811 --> 00:12:12,439 You lose again, you stupid intoxicant. 241 00:12:14,316 --> 00:12:15,651 (FOLK MUSIC PLAYING) 242 00:12:27,287 --> 00:12:29,957 We're not from around here. Hello. 243 00:12:30,415 --> 00:12:33,543 (SPEAKING IN INDECIPHERABLE LANGUAGE) 244 00:12:33,877 --> 00:12:37,673 Excuse me, but we're guests on your planet. Speak English! 245 00:12:37,839 --> 00:12:39,633 Behave yourselves, gents. 246 00:12:39,716 --> 00:12:42,261 Off-worlders best be welcome here, 247 00:12:42,344 --> 00:12:45,347 especially if we're trying to get the Olympics. 248 00:12:45,472 --> 00:12:46,848 (CLAMORING) 249 00:12:48,850 --> 00:12:50,269 May I buy you a drink? 250 00:12:50,352 --> 00:12:52,854 We don't get a lot of pretty faces around here. 251 00:12:53,146 --> 00:12:54,273 (GIGGLES) Uh... 252 00:12:54,356 --> 00:12:56,233 Sure, but I'm driving. 253 00:12:56,358 --> 00:12:58,610 I'll just have the smallest whiskey you've got. 254 00:12:58,694 --> 00:13:01,947 A small aquarium of whiskey for the busty lass. 255 00:13:03,240 --> 00:13:05,284 Thanks. I suppose I should know your name 256 00:13:05,367 --> 00:13:07,953 if I'm going to be drinking ten gallons of alcohol with you. 257 00:13:08,161 --> 00:13:10,831 MacZongo. Angus MacZongo. 258 00:13:11,206 --> 00:13:13,333 Major Angus MacZongo. 259 00:13:13,417 --> 00:13:16,878 Handsome Major Angus MacZongo, Esquire. 260 00:13:17,004 --> 00:13:18,171 Ooh! 261 00:13:18,255 --> 00:13:20,048 Handsome and Esquire. 262 00:13:20,299 --> 00:13:23,385 I'm Turanga Leela. My crew and I are from Earth. 263 00:13:24,886 --> 00:13:27,389 So what brings you folks here to Do oh an 6? 264 00:13:27,472 --> 00:13:30,392 We just released an endangered animal back into the wild, 265 00:13:30,475 --> 00:13:31,727 a bone vampire. 266 00:13:31,893 --> 00:13:33,145 (THUNDER CLAPS) 267 00:13:36,565 --> 00:13:40,569 No need to thank us. Your shocked stares of gratitude say it all. 268 00:13:40,944 --> 00:13:44,406 Dear God, you brought back the bone vampire? 269 00:13:44,489 --> 00:13:46,158 The damned things wreaked bloody havoc 270 00:13:46,241 --> 00:13:48,160 on our livestock for centuries. 271 00:13:48,243 --> 00:13:52,164 Aye, until MacZongo here shot 'em all into extinction, he did. 272 00:13:52,331 --> 00:13:55,667 Now we've got more livestock than we can slaughter. 273 00:13:55,751 --> 00:13:59,296 Aye, 'tis a Bonnie time to be an ignorant villager. 274 00:13:59,588 --> 00:14:03,342 We cannae have no murdering bone vampires back here. 275 00:14:03,467 --> 00:14:05,719 Kill it afore it puts a bun in its own oven 276 00:14:05,802 --> 00:14:07,721 and repopulates the bleeding planet. 277 00:14:07,804 --> 00:14:09,598 No! Angus is right. 278 00:14:09,806 --> 00:14:11,391 I thought you were named Angus. 279 00:14:11,558 --> 00:14:12,893 We're all named Angus. 280 00:14:13,101 --> 00:14:15,771 Please, Mr. Peppy won't attack your livestock. 281 00:14:15,854 --> 00:14:18,607 He's a vegetarian, and he's not even preachy about it. 282 00:14:18,774 --> 00:14:21,401 Poppycock. Once he gets the smell of bones, 283 00:14:21,485 --> 00:14:25,280 there'll be no stopping him. Tonight, Mr. Peppy must die. 284 00:14:26,531 --> 00:14:29,326 Angus, wait, my strictly platonic friend is right. 285 00:14:29,785 --> 00:14:32,287 At least wait a few days before you decide to Kill it. 286 00:14:32,704 --> 00:14:36,792 The last time I hesitated, a bone vampire snicked out me left shin. 287 00:14:39,711 --> 00:14:41,505 Please, just a few days. 288 00:14:42,297 --> 00:14:45,384 Well, it would give us a chance to get to know each other. 289 00:14:46,468 --> 00:14:49,304 The beast lives for now. 290 00:14:49,638 --> 00:14:50,889 Thank you, Angus. 291 00:14:51,098 --> 00:14:52,516 You're welcome! 292 00:14:56,061 --> 00:14:57,062 (YAWNING) 293 00:15:00,899 --> 00:15:02,901 I don't trust that MacZongo. 294 00:15:03,110 --> 00:15:05,237 Maybe I should go keep an eye on Mr. Peppy. 295 00:15:05,320 --> 00:15:07,155 Don't worry about MacZongo. 296 00:15:07,239 --> 00:15:10,742 He and I are having brunch tomorrow. I'm thinking of wearing this. 297 00:15:11,076 --> 00:15:15,080 It's nice, but there's still something I don't like about that guy. 298 00:15:15,163 --> 00:15:17,582 My dad always said you could tell a lot about a man 299 00:15:17,666 --> 00:15:19,835 by the rigidity of his shins. 300 00:15:20,669 --> 00:15:22,087 (SNORING) 301 00:15:27,134 --> 00:15:28,093 (MAN SCREAMS) 302 00:15:28,176 --> 00:15:29,261 (ALL GASP) 303 00:15:29,344 --> 00:15:30,720 What is it? 304 00:15:35,725 --> 00:15:39,646 Gryffindor, Slytherin, Hufflepuff! It killed little Angus! 305 00:15:39,771 --> 00:15:42,524 They're all dead, and their bones are gone. 306 00:15:42,607 --> 00:15:45,110 This was no accident. 307 00:15:45,360 --> 00:15:48,196 Still think your Mr. Peppy is harmless, Fry? 308 00:15:48,447 --> 00:15:50,198 He wouldn't do this in our sleep. 309 00:15:50,282 --> 00:15:52,367 He would not, could not to a sheep. 310 00:15:52,701 --> 00:15:55,579 The deal is off. The beast must die. 311 00:16:00,333 --> 00:16:02,461 Ooh. Pimpy. 312 00:16:06,548 --> 00:16:07,966 What are we supposed to do, 313 00:16:08,049 --> 00:16:10,677 just sit here and wait for Mr. Peppy to be killed? 314 00:16:10,760 --> 00:16:12,095 Sounds like a plan. 315 00:16:12,179 --> 00:16:15,474 Guess I'll pass the time by lighting up an El Jerko. 316 00:16:22,105 --> 00:16:23,106 (BIRD CHIRPING) 317 00:16:24,774 --> 00:16:25,817 (COUGHING) 318 00:16:25,901 --> 00:16:28,403 Okay, that's it. I need some air. 319 00:16:33,533 --> 00:16:34,534 (CRACKLING) 320 00:16:35,243 --> 00:16:36,661 Who's there? 321 00:16:37,913 --> 00:16:40,874 Hermes, is this one of your zany practical jokes? 322 00:16:42,417 --> 00:16:43,418 (YELLING) 323 00:16:50,675 --> 00:16:51,676 (GASPING) 324 00:16:53,386 --> 00:16:56,348 Leela, are you okay? Did you drink too many aquaria? 325 00:16:56,973 --> 00:16:58,642 Look, the bone vampire! 326 00:17:02,103 --> 00:17:03,188 (MOANS) 327 00:17:03,271 --> 00:17:06,399 Mr. Peppy attacked me. Quick, count my bones. 328 00:17:06,608 --> 00:17:08,109 There should be 205. 329 00:17:13,949 --> 00:17:16,034 Okay, that's better. 330 00:17:16,117 --> 00:17:17,202 Keep them coming! 331 00:17:17,536 --> 00:17:21,790 I'm sorry, Fry, but no vegetarian could have done this. 332 00:17:22,082 --> 00:17:26,503 I know, and as much as I love Mr. Peppy, I love Leela more. 333 00:17:26,962 --> 00:17:29,130 He has to be put down. 334 00:17:29,464 --> 00:17:33,843 Ah, don't feel bad. Major MacZongo is an experienced hunter. 335 00:17:33,927 --> 00:17:37,138 He'll blow Mr. Peppy's head off as painlessly as possible. 336 00:17:37,305 --> 00:17:38,890 No, not MacZongo! 337 00:17:38,974 --> 00:17:42,769 If anyone is going to kill Mr. Peppy, it should be me. 338 00:17:42,852 --> 00:17:45,480 Fry, I know you're upset right now, 339 00:17:45,564 --> 00:17:49,651 but I hope you'll consider donating the body to science dinner. 340 00:17:49,734 --> 00:17:50,735 (SLURPING) 341 00:17:54,364 --> 00:17:55,657 Here, Mr. Peppy. 342 00:17:55,824 --> 00:17:58,159 Mmm, lovely bones. 343 00:17:58,451 --> 00:18:01,663 We've been walking for hours. I hope we can find our way back. 344 00:18:01,871 --> 00:18:04,416 Don't worry, I left a trail of bread crumbs. 345 00:18:04,541 --> 00:18:06,751 And I left a trail of cigars. 346 00:18:10,463 --> 00:18:12,257 You don't have to do this, Fry. 347 00:18:12,340 --> 00:18:14,801 Mr. Peppy just gave me a little love concussion. 348 00:18:14,884 --> 00:18:16,970 Thanks, Leela, but I have no choice. 349 00:18:17,053 --> 00:18:20,348 I can't let my monstrous de-boner get anywhere near you. 350 00:18:20,432 --> 00:18:21,850 There it is! 351 00:18:23,935 --> 00:18:25,353 Well, this is it. 352 00:18:25,645 --> 00:18:27,480 You guys wait here. 353 00:18:27,564 --> 00:18:30,734 This is going to kill him more than it does me. 354 00:18:33,278 --> 00:18:34,529 Goodbye, boy. 355 00:18:34,613 --> 00:18:37,657 I'll think of you whenever I sit on something round. 356 00:18:40,994 --> 00:18:41,995 (SCREAMS) 357 00:18:43,872 --> 00:18:44,873 (EVERYONE GASPS) 358 00:18:44,956 --> 00:18:47,042 What's happening? Did you Kill it? 359 00:18:47,292 --> 00:18:51,129 The bloody idiot bloody shot me. I'm all bloody bloody! 360 00:18:51,379 --> 00:18:52,881 (EXCLAIMING) 361 00:18:52,964 --> 00:18:55,425 Mr. Peppy, bullets make you talk? 362 00:18:55,717 --> 00:18:57,594 That's not Mr. Peppy. 363 00:19:00,055 --> 00:19:02,432 Jinkies, he Scooby-Doo-ed us. 364 00:19:02,682 --> 00:19:05,060 Why, Major MacZongo, why? 365 00:19:05,268 --> 00:19:09,314 It's been 30 years since last I killed a bone vampire. 366 00:19:09,397 --> 00:19:11,983 The villagers didn't idolize me like they used to. 367 00:19:12,192 --> 00:19:14,277 You seemed pretty popular at the pub. 368 00:19:14,444 --> 00:19:16,905 I work there as a greeter. 369 00:19:16,988 --> 00:19:19,324 Your beast was my chance to be a hero again, 370 00:19:19,407 --> 00:19:21,201 but the damn thing was a vegetarian, 371 00:19:21,326 --> 00:19:23,161 so I slaughtered the sheep myself. 372 00:19:23,411 --> 00:19:24,913 But why did you attack me? 373 00:19:25,121 --> 00:19:28,249 So I could impress you by seeking revenge on the creature. 374 00:19:28,375 --> 00:19:30,585 Us greeters don't get a lot of action. 375 00:19:30,669 --> 00:19:32,754 On paper it seemed like a win-win situation. 376 00:19:32,962 --> 00:19:35,590 Do you realize what this means, Fry? 377 00:19:35,715 --> 00:19:38,343 Your pet's not dangerous after all. 378 00:19:38,426 --> 00:19:41,638 I told you. Mr. Peppy's a lover, not a fighter, 379 00:19:41,721 --> 00:19:44,182 like Dwayne "The Rock" "The Tooth Fairy" Johnson. 380 00:19:44,599 --> 00:19:46,434 (CHEERING) 381 00:19:47,352 --> 00:19:48,770 (SLURPING SOUND) 382 00:19:48,853 --> 00:19:51,189 Hey, what's that bone-sucking sound? 383 00:19:54,442 --> 00:19:56,986 It's Mr. Peppy. I'd know him anywhere. 384 00:19:57,278 --> 00:20:00,365 Huh. So apparently, Major MacZongo and Mr. Peppy 385 00:20:00,448 --> 00:20:02,283 were each doing about half the sheep-killing. 386 00:20:03,118 --> 00:20:04,119 (GROWLING) 387 00:20:04,452 --> 00:20:05,453 (SCREAMING) 388 00:20:08,123 --> 00:20:12,168 Why, Mr. Peppy, why? That tickles. (LAUGHING) 389 00:20:12,252 --> 00:20:15,463 (CRYING) Now I really do have to kill you. 390 00:20:17,465 --> 00:20:19,008 Wait! Don't shoot! 391 00:20:19,300 --> 00:20:21,094 The beast is a Godsend. 392 00:20:21,177 --> 00:20:24,556 Like I said, we've more livestock than we can slaughter, 393 00:20:24,639 --> 00:20:28,643 but thanks to this ravenous bogie, that's no more a problem. 394 00:20:28,935 --> 00:20:30,228 Angus is right. 395 00:20:30,311 --> 00:20:32,564 The cursed thing even debones them, 396 00:20:32,647 --> 00:20:36,067 which is perfect for today's fast-paced, lazy consumer. 397 00:20:36,317 --> 00:20:39,154 (SPEAKING IN INDECIPHERABLE LANGUAGE) 398 00:20:39,320 --> 00:20:40,864 The beast must live! 399 00:20:41,239 --> 00:20:43,116 (CHEERING) 400 00:20:44,075 --> 00:20:45,785 You know what the best part is? 401 00:20:45,869 --> 00:20:49,622 From now on, whenever we're eating fresh, organic space-meat, 402 00:20:49,706 --> 00:20:51,958 we'll know exactly where it comes from. 403 00:20:53,501 --> 00:20:57,464 One bucket of double-fried, triple-salted, boneless sheep tots, please. 404 00:20:57,630 --> 00:20:59,299 What kind of cheese filling you want in that? 405 00:20:59,632 --> 00:21:01,259 All kinds. 406 00:21:01,342 --> 00:21:02,844 Ah... Make it two, 407 00:21:03,511 --> 00:21:06,055 and a small whiskey. Large. 29383

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.