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1
00:00:02,160 --> 00:00:03,250
Tonight at 11:00...
2
00:00:03,330 --> 00:00:05,790
(SHOUTING)
Doom!
3
00:00:26,810 --> 00:00:29,150
Boy, that thing's big.
4
00:00:29,230 --> 00:00:31,570
Fry, is my colossal eye
too big?
5
00:00:31,820 --> 00:00:34,200
No, it's what
makes you you.
6
00:00:34,280 --> 00:00:37,530
But it's so round,
so hideously round.
7
00:00:37,620 --> 00:00:39,030
Leela, listen.
8
00:00:39,120 --> 00:00:42,040
You're the most
beautiful woman
I've ever known.
9
00:00:42,120 --> 00:00:44,540
Oh. So you only care
about my looks?
10
00:00:44,620 --> 00:00:46,120
No, I... What?
11
00:00:46,210 --> 00:00:49,630
Finally, New New York
got a blast of class today
12
00:00:49,800 --> 00:00:53,460
as Nikolai, playboy ruler
of the Robo-Hungarian Empire,
13
00:00:53,550 --> 00:00:56,840
arrived aboard
his extravagant
caviar-powered yacht.
14
00:00:56,930 --> 00:00:58,970
I am just
a humble emperor
15
00:00:59,180 --> 00:01:01,220
with a big,
big crown!
16
00:01:01,720 --> 00:01:04,180
Of course
I'm not planning to
steal that crown!
17
00:01:04,270 --> 00:01:05,600
What?
True.
18
00:01:05,690 --> 00:01:07,770
I've always dreamed
of being an emperor.
19
00:01:07,860 --> 00:01:10,190
You know, for Halloween,
and then forever.
20
00:01:10,270 --> 00:01:12,820
But heisting those jewels
would be difficult.
21
00:01:12,900 --> 00:01:14,400
You'd be stupid to try.
22
00:01:14,490 --> 00:01:15,780
I'll need accomplices.
23
00:01:15,860 --> 00:01:18,360
A sexy vamp to distract
and tie up the guard.
24
00:01:18,450 --> 00:01:19,620
Never!
25
00:01:20,280 --> 00:01:22,700
A claw man to slip past
the metal detector
26
00:01:22,790 --> 00:01:24,250
and cut the alarm wires.
27
00:01:24,330 --> 00:01:27,420
Sorry,
I'm set for life
after that last job.
28
00:01:31,250 --> 00:01:32,960
And finally, a chump,
29
00:01:33,050 --> 00:01:35,170
to be caught on video
and later arrested.
30
00:01:35,420 --> 00:01:37,300
As I told you on
Sucker-Punch Day,
31
00:01:37,380 --> 00:01:38,680
I'm through being a chump.
32
00:01:39,180 --> 00:01:42,510
Of course,
it would all require
split-second robotic timing.
33
00:01:42,600 --> 00:01:46,060
That's where I come in.
You see, I own a watch.
34
00:01:48,900 --> 00:01:52,940
There. This time I'm sure
I've fixed the mind switcher.
35
00:01:53,030 --> 00:01:56,320
Good, I'm sick of
cleaning up those heaps
of dead monkeys.
36
00:01:56,400 --> 00:01:58,570
But why would
you want your mind
in a new body?
37
00:01:58,780 --> 00:02:01,950
Well, as a man
enters his 18th decade,
38
00:02:02,030 --> 00:02:04,790
he thinks back
on the mistakes
he's made in life.
39
00:02:05,200 --> 00:02:06,620
Like the heaps
of dead monkeys?
40
00:02:06,870 --> 00:02:09,620
Science cannot move forward
without heaps!
41
00:02:09,710 --> 00:02:13,840
No, what I regret
is the youth I wasted
playing it safe.
42
00:02:14,170 --> 00:02:16,710
I wasted my
youth porking out.
43
00:02:16,920 --> 00:02:18,380
Yes, I remember.
44
00:02:19,760 --> 00:02:21,140
Would you please
take that down?
45
00:02:21,220 --> 00:02:22,470
It's making me hungry.
46
00:02:22,550 --> 00:02:26,220
Funny, I could use
a little extra meat
on my bones.
47
00:02:26,730 --> 00:02:27,810
Wait a second!
48
00:02:27,890 --> 00:02:31,810
If we switched bodies,
I could live life
to the extreme,
49
00:02:31,900 --> 00:02:34,400
and you could indulge
your demonic food lust.
50
00:02:34,570 --> 00:02:38,780
(GASPS) We're just the people
this mind switcher was
made for by us!
51
00:02:41,490 --> 00:02:43,620
Wait, can I still
change my mind?
52
00:02:43,700 --> 00:02:44,910
Let's find out.
53
00:02:51,710 --> 00:02:54,340
(IN AMY'S VOICE)
It didn't work, you
doddering old... (GASPS)
54
00:02:55,050 --> 00:02:56,840
(IN FARNSWORTH'S VOICE)
Ah! Cartilage!
55
00:02:56,920 --> 00:02:59,970
Dude, I bid you
a fond cowabunga.
56
00:03:00,050 --> 00:03:02,640
I'm off to laugh
at the Reaper.
57
00:03:05,970 --> 00:03:07,100
(WHOOPING)
58
00:03:08,310 --> 00:03:10,640
Look out, world,
here I... (GROANS)
59
00:03:15,190 --> 00:03:18,360
I'm sorry, Amy,
but your body's
not up to the task.
60
00:03:18,610 --> 00:03:22,360
Also,
I don't care for these boobs
flapping every which way.
61
00:03:22,450 --> 00:03:23,990
Now, quit your
bologna-gargling
62
00:03:24,070 --> 00:03:26,660
and let's switch back
into our original bodies.
63
00:03:27,160 --> 00:03:30,830
Body-switching, eh?
Mayhap the heist is back on.
64
00:03:30,910 --> 00:03:33,620
Who needs accomplices,
if I can just
use their bodies?
65
00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:36,420
(DEVICE BEEPING)
66
00:03:39,130 --> 00:03:41,420
Professor,
what's not happening?
67
00:03:41,590 --> 00:03:43,340
Bad news, me.
68
00:03:43,430 --> 00:03:46,930
I failed to take into account
the cerebral immune response.
69
00:03:47,010 --> 00:03:48,180
You idiot!
70
00:03:48,520 --> 00:03:50,930
Once two bodies
have switched minds,
71
00:03:51,020 --> 00:03:53,140
they can never
switch back.
72
00:03:55,060 --> 00:03:56,810
However,
perhaps they can.
73
00:03:56,980 --> 00:03:59,780
Maybe we can swap back
using a third body
74
00:03:59,860 --> 00:04:01,780
for temporary storage space.
75
00:04:02,030 --> 00:04:04,240
I'm 60% storage space.
76
00:04:05,320 --> 00:04:07,330
You are?
I... Mmm?
77
00:04:10,330 --> 00:04:12,000
(IN BENDER'S VOICE)
Well, I'm off to
the royal yacht
78
00:04:12,080 --> 00:04:13,660
for a quick
seduce-and-snatch.
79
00:04:13,790 --> 00:04:15,750
See you!
(IN FARNSWORTH'S VOICE)
Now, then, Amy
80
00:04:15,830 --> 00:04:18,380
we'll simply switch bodies,
and then we'll...
81
00:04:18,460 --> 00:04:19,460
We'll...
82
00:04:19,550 --> 00:04:21,710
No, I'd be back
in my body,
83
00:04:21,800 --> 00:04:23,720
but then you and Bender
would be switched.
84
00:04:23,800 --> 00:04:28,100
And the Amy and Bender bodies
can't trade minds again,
since they just did.
85
00:04:28,350 --> 00:04:29,600
Oh, no!
86
00:04:29,680 --> 00:04:31,220
Is it possible to
get everyone back
87
00:04:31,310 --> 00:04:33,430
to normal using
four or more bodies?
88
00:04:33,520 --> 00:04:34,640
I'm not sure.
89
00:04:34,730 --> 00:04:36,690
I'm afraid we need to use
90
00:04:37,310 --> 00:04:38,360
math.
91
00:04:45,320 --> 00:04:46,860
Stupid air-needing lungs.
92
00:04:48,410 --> 00:04:50,450
(GASPS) The crown jewels.
93
00:04:50,540 --> 00:04:53,410
Now I just have
to locate the guard
and seduce him in...
94
00:04:54,040 --> 00:04:55,160
Four seconds?
95
00:04:55,290 --> 00:04:56,420
GUARD: Who goes there?
96
00:04:56,500 --> 00:04:58,420
Three, two, one.
97
00:04:58,710 --> 00:05:00,630
(IN FEMALE VOICE)
Hello, big boy.
98
00:05:00,710 --> 00:05:02,250
(IMITATING EROTIC MUSIC)
99
00:05:03,130 --> 00:05:04,970
Silence!
I am Basil,
100
00:05:05,050 --> 00:05:07,430
the Emperor's cousin
and chief of his royal guard.
101
00:05:07,510 --> 00:05:09,390
And I shall not
be seduced by a...
102
00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:11,640
I said...
103
00:05:11,720 --> 00:05:13,390
(IMITATING EROTIC MUSIC)
104
00:05:16,650 --> 00:05:17,650
(GROANING)
105
00:05:17,730 --> 00:05:19,360
(MUTTERING)
106
00:05:19,440 --> 00:05:21,070
Professor?
What's the matter?
107
00:05:21,400 --> 00:05:24,530
I'm Amy.
The Professor and I
switched bodies.
108
00:05:24,650 --> 00:05:25,650
Oh, lord.
109
00:05:25,740 --> 00:05:28,490
All I wanted was to
gorge myself a little,
110
00:05:28,570 --> 00:05:31,160
but I can't digest anything
with these false teeth
111
00:05:31,240 --> 00:05:33,040
and this hit-or-miss colon.
112
00:05:33,120 --> 00:05:35,540
At least you get
a senior discount
at the movies.
113
00:05:35,620 --> 00:05:39,830
I hate paying $14
to see Nicolas Cage
solve things.
114
00:05:39,920 --> 00:05:43,050
If you want to save $2,
we could switch bodies.
115
00:05:43,460 --> 00:05:46,220
Hmm. We can always
switch back, right?
116
00:05:47,090 --> 00:05:48,260
(GIGGLES INNOCENTLY)
117
00:05:52,100 --> 00:05:53,100
Hey, Leela.
118
00:05:53,180 --> 00:05:55,220
Mmm.
What smells saturated?
119
00:05:55,310 --> 00:05:58,940
Deep-fried ice cream sandwich
wrapped in frosting
and lightly baconed.
120
00:05:59,150 --> 00:06:01,940
Whoa. That sounds
like something Amy
would say and eat.
121
00:06:02,230 --> 00:06:05,740
I am Amy. Leela and I
used the Professor's
mind-switching machine.
122
00:06:06,030 --> 00:06:08,320
So Leela's
in your body?
123
00:06:08,950 --> 00:06:09,990
(IN LEELA'S VOICE)
Not exactly.
124
00:06:10,160 --> 00:06:11,160
(EXCLAIMS IN FEAR)
125
00:06:11,370 --> 00:06:14,160
Aha! You do only
like me for my body!
126
00:06:14,580 --> 00:06:16,910
That is entirely
not true, sir!
127
00:06:17,290 --> 00:06:18,750
(MUFFLED GROANS)
128
00:06:19,670 --> 00:06:23,420
Now to go switch
bodies with Zoidberg,
sneak past the metal detector
129
00:06:23,500 --> 00:06:25,840
and clip the alarm wires,
all in less than...
130
00:06:26,420 --> 00:06:28,840
Ten minutes ago? Oh!
131
00:06:29,220 --> 00:06:30,260
(BEEPING)
132
00:06:30,340 --> 00:06:31,760
(ALARM SOUNDING)
133
00:06:35,430 --> 00:06:38,390
Uh, could you come back
when my chump gets here?
134
00:06:42,610 --> 00:06:46,110
Now, then,
what is a filthy human doing
aboard my royal yacht?
135
00:06:46,190 --> 00:06:49,490
With all due respect,
Your Majesty,
I'm a robot like you.
136
00:06:49,570 --> 00:06:51,700
I just switched bodies
with some bimbo.
137
00:06:51,780 --> 00:06:54,370
Go ahead, ask me something
only a robot would know.
138
00:06:54,450 --> 00:06:56,990
A reverse Turing Test, eh?
Very good.
139
00:06:57,160 --> 00:06:58,580
What is the square root
of nine?
140
00:06:58,660 --> 00:07:01,170
Uh, hold on, let me
just get out a pencil.
141
00:07:01,790 --> 00:07:06,000
(SIGHS) Okay, look,
I'm not that kind of robot.
I'm more this kind of robot.
142
00:07:06,130 --> 00:07:07,760
(BEAT BOXING)
143
00:07:08,090 --> 00:07:11,010
He steps forwards
but moves backwards.
144
00:07:11,090 --> 00:07:13,340
By the gods!
He is a machine!
145
00:07:15,100 --> 00:07:17,850
No, that won't
restore everyone, either.
146
00:07:17,930 --> 00:07:21,520
Besides, I don't want
my decrepit old body back!
147
00:07:21,600 --> 00:07:26,190
I'm running away with
this invincible robot body
and joining something.
148
00:07:30,740 --> 00:07:34,700
Look,
I paid for 15 robot clowns
per cubic meter of car,
149
00:07:34,780 --> 00:07:38,740
and you're
barely giving me 12.
Now, crumple up and get in...
150
00:07:38,830 --> 00:07:40,290
And fasten your seatbelts.
151
00:07:40,370 --> 00:07:42,000
(ALL GROANING)
Come on!
152
00:07:43,040 --> 00:07:44,210
Good day.
153
00:07:44,290 --> 00:07:47,630
I am Nonchalanto,
the robot daredevil.
154
00:07:47,710 --> 00:07:52,680
And my dream is to
risk my life in strange
and original ways.
155
00:07:52,800 --> 00:07:55,300
Hmm. You don't look
so foolhardy to me.
156
00:08:05,770 --> 00:08:06,980
(APPLAUSE)
157
00:08:07,520 --> 00:08:10,030
That's the dumbest thing
anybody's ever done.
158
00:08:10,400 --> 00:08:11,650
You're hired!
159
00:08:16,070 --> 00:08:17,870
So you're a common
bending robot,
160
00:08:17,950 --> 00:08:19,620
with a human
peasant roommate?
161
00:08:19,700 --> 00:08:22,330
Oh, crap,
that is what I am!
162
00:08:22,410 --> 00:08:24,370
No, Bender, I envy you.
163
00:08:24,460 --> 00:08:26,750
I'm so bored
with all these
pretentious trappings.
164
00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:29,500
The jewels, the parties,
the beautiful robo-women.
165
00:08:29,590 --> 00:08:30,750
Hello.
166
00:08:33,090 --> 00:08:35,630
(SCOFFS) My fiancée,
Princess Flavia.
167
00:08:35,890 --> 00:08:39,640
Dearest, meet Bender.
He's a robot in the body of
a Chinese Martian physicist.
168
00:08:39,890 --> 00:08:41,770
How tedious.
169
00:08:41,930 --> 00:08:45,310
Oh, to escape this
gilded cage for a day.
170
00:08:45,400 --> 00:08:48,360
You know,
we could trade bodies.
171
00:08:48,440 --> 00:08:50,480
I could take over
the humdrum royal stuff,
172
00:08:50,570 --> 00:08:52,280
and you could be
a regular Joe for a day.
173
00:08:53,150 --> 00:08:55,400
Or more. Much more.
174
00:08:55,490 --> 00:08:59,490
In that horrid
non-robot body?
Sir, I have my standards.
175
00:08:59,700 --> 00:09:03,750
Ah, but what if I could
put you in my fabulous
bending-robot body?
176
00:09:04,040 --> 00:09:07,630
(GIGGLES) Me, posing
as a lowly bending unit?
177
00:09:07,880 --> 00:09:09,040
How wicked!
178
00:09:09,500 --> 00:09:12,800
But wait, I'm supposed
to give a speech
at the U. N. Tomorrow.
179
00:09:12,880 --> 00:09:14,220
Can I trust you to do it?
180
00:09:14,340 --> 00:09:15,670
You can trust anything.
181
00:09:20,470 --> 00:09:21,970
So now Leela's
all crotchety
182
00:09:22,060 --> 00:09:25,020
because she thinks
I'm not attracted to her
in the Professor's body.
183
00:09:25,230 --> 00:09:27,140
You aren't, are you?
Of course not!
184
00:09:27,230 --> 00:09:30,360
But I was willing
to lie about it.
What more can a man do?
185
00:09:30,440 --> 00:09:32,780
A man can give her a toke
of her own medicine.
186
00:09:33,030 --> 00:09:35,900
Yes! I could put my mind
into a hideous body
187
00:09:35,990 --> 00:09:38,200
and show Leela she's
not attracted to me.
188
00:09:38,570 --> 00:09:42,490
But it would have to be
a really, really
disgusting body.
189
00:09:42,830 --> 00:09:46,660
Friends! Friends!
I've got barnacles
on my tuchus.
190
00:09:47,170 --> 00:09:49,330
The long search is over.
191
00:09:49,960 --> 00:09:53,050
Wait here and earn interest
while I find my robot body.
192
00:09:56,550 --> 00:09:57,550
Professor?
193
00:09:57,630 --> 00:09:58,930
Leela. Amy?
194
00:09:59,010 --> 00:10:00,760
Bender.
Have you seen my body?
195
00:10:00,850 --> 00:10:02,010
I think
the Professor's in it.
196
00:10:02,350 --> 00:10:04,720
Yeah, he said something
about running away.
197
00:10:05,020 --> 00:10:06,060
Then he ran away.
198
00:10:06,180 --> 00:10:07,270
What? Whither?
199
00:10:19,200 --> 00:10:20,240
What am I gonna do?
200
00:10:20,320 --> 00:10:22,780
I got an emperor
all patsied up to
switch bodies,
201
00:10:22,870 --> 00:10:24,120
but only with
another robot!
202
00:10:24,450 --> 00:10:25,830
Washbucket full.
203
00:10:26,200 --> 00:10:27,660
Scruffy's work here
is done.
204
00:10:35,260 --> 00:10:36,800
(CHUCKLING)
205
00:10:36,880 --> 00:10:38,970
(CACKLING)
206
00:10:39,050 --> 00:10:41,590
(IN BENDER'S VOICE)
Now to find Emperor
Von Richendoof.
207
00:10:41,680 --> 00:10:43,220
Now to find Scruffy.
208
00:10:45,390 --> 00:10:47,930
Switch bodies?
I don't see why not.
209
00:10:48,730 --> 00:10:50,390
I also don't see why.
210
00:10:51,560 --> 00:10:52,860
(CHUCKLING)
211
00:10:52,940 --> 00:10:54,520
(IN FRY'S VOICE)
In your face, Leela.
212
00:10:54,860 --> 00:10:58,820
If you're a bender,
why is your body
full of fetid water?
213
00:10:58,900 --> 00:11:00,860
If you're an emperor,
why don't you shut up?
214
00:11:01,240 --> 00:11:02,320
Move it, Fry!
215
00:11:05,080 --> 00:11:06,830
Well, so long.
Wait!
216
00:11:06,910 --> 00:11:08,500
Point me to my
normal human roommate!
217
00:11:08,580 --> 00:11:10,120
That's him there.
Maybe.
218
00:11:10,290 --> 00:11:11,540
Got to go!
219
00:11:12,750 --> 00:11:14,000
(IN DR. ZOIDBERG'S VOICE)
Robot?
220
00:11:14,130 --> 00:11:16,590
Yes, 'tis I, Bender.
221
00:11:16,670 --> 00:11:18,880
Do you not recognize
your own best friend?
222
00:11:19,090 --> 00:11:21,930
Aha! The guy in this body
has a friend!
223
00:11:22,300 --> 00:11:25,930
Bender, old pal!
It's me, the Fry!
224
00:11:28,270 --> 00:11:31,770
But then Nicolas Cage
discovered the real
treasure was his family.
225
00:11:32,270 --> 00:11:33,600
Yes, I'll hold.
226
00:11:34,610 --> 00:11:36,860
Hey, Leela, look!
I'm in Zoidberg!
227
00:11:37,900 --> 00:11:38,900
Fry?
228
00:11:38,990 --> 00:11:40,150
You're not so shallow
229
00:11:40,240 --> 00:11:43,110
that you find me repulsive
because of my body, are you?
230
00:11:44,740 --> 00:11:45,820
(CHOKES)
231
00:11:46,120 --> 00:11:47,450
Not at all.
232
00:11:51,460 --> 00:11:53,040
Amy? Stop it!
233
00:11:53,120 --> 00:11:56,290
Fry, help!
She's turning me
into a parade float.
234
00:11:56,590 --> 00:11:58,050
Ew! Look at her!
235
00:11:58,130 --> 00:11:59,130
(GROWLS)
236
00:11:59,880 --> 00:12:03,260
Oh. So you're so shallow
that my body disgusts you
237
00:12:03,340 --> 00:12:05,090
if it puts on
a little extra weight?
238
00:12:05,180 --> 00:12:07,010
That wasn't
a little extra weight.
239
00:12:07,100 --> 00:12:09,890
Admit it!
You don't care about
the inner me at all!
240
00:12:09,970 --> 00:12:11,270
No, you admit it!
241
00:12:11,350 --> 00:12:12,980
You'd be ashamed
to be seen in public
242
00:12:13,060 --> 00:12:14,650
with someone as
hideous as me!
243
00:12:14,730 --> 00:12:16,520
Would not!
Oh, yeah?
244
00:12:16,610 --> 00:12:20,230
Then I challenge you
to a romantic dinner
at Elzar's tonight.
245
00:12:20,320 --> 00:12:21,740
It's on.
246
00:12:26,200 --> 00:12:27,200
(DOOR OPENS)
247
00:12:27,450 --> 00:12:29,080
Sweet orca of Majorca!
248
00:12:29,160 --> 00:12:31,330
You make Fat Albert look
like Normal Albert!
249
00:12:31,580 --> 00:12:32,910
I don't know what to do.
250
00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:34,750
Do you think I
should eat more butter?
251
00:12:34,830 --> 00:12:36,790
I am putting a stop
to this right now!
252
00:12:36,880 --> 00:12:38,750
Come on.
We're switching bodies.
253
00:12:38,840 --> 00:12:42,130
Hermes, no!
I'll ruin your body, too!
254
00:12:43,090 --> 00:12:45,760
Three decades of the munchies
beat you to it.
255
00:13:03,740 --> 00:13:05,780
BIG BERTHA: You make
quite a show, young man.
256
00:13:05,860 --> 00:13:08,530
You remind me of myself
as a young cannon.
257
00:13:08,620 --> 00:13:11,200
Big Bertha is
the circus's grande dame.
258
00:13:11,290 --> 00:13:13,290
She shoots robots
through the air.
259
00:13:13,540 --> 00:13:14,620
(BELCHES)
260
00:13:14,870 --> 00:13:17,170
Excuse me.
Too much goulash.
261
00:13:17,250 --> 00:13:19,880
I've always wanted
to be shot out of something.
262
00:13:19,960 --> 00:13:22,300
How about a quick
blast after lunch?
263
00:13:22,460 --> 00:13:26,680
Alas, a fine big one like you
would shatter my barrel.
264
00:13:26,760 --> 00:13:30,140
But, ah, to amaze
the crowd once more.
265
00:13:30,510 --> 00:13:33,310
I understand
the problems of age,
266
00:13:33,390 --> 00:13:35,680
but suppose I could
put you in a new body?
267
00:13:35,770 --> 00:13:39,650
Never! My body may be old,
but it is mine,
268
00:13:39,730 --> 00:13:43,570
and every crack
a memory of heavy things
shot a long way.
269
00:13:43,650 --> 00:13:45,150
Good day!
270
00:13:50,120 --> 00:13:51,160
(JEWELS CLATTERING)
271
00:13:51,240 --> 00:13:52,280
(SIGHS)
272
00:13:52,370 --> 00:13:56,500
I have
everything I ever wanted.
Money, wealth, riches.
273
00:13:56,920 --> 00:13:58,460
Yet something's missing.
274
00:13:58,580 --> 00:14:00,750
A hot princess with
whom to get grizzly.
275
00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:03,880
Hello.
Hello, baby!
276
00:14:04,840 --> 00:14:07,010
Huh? Hey,
what's going on here?
277
00:14:07,090 --> 00:14:09,970
And why are you kissing
my dashing cousin
instead of me?
278
00:14:10,050 --> 00:14:12,180
Nikolai,
you imperial fool.
279
00:14:12,260 --> 00:14:14,770
We've been having
an affair for 700 years.
280
00:14:15,100 --> 00:14:18,100
At long last,
I shall kill you,
blame the burglar
281
00:14:18,190 --> 00:14:20,020
and inherit the throne.
282
00:14:27,570 --> 00:14:29,200
Farewell, Nikolai.
283
00:14:29,280 --> 00:14:30,860
Wait! I'm not Nikolai!
284
00:14:30,950 --> 00:14:33,780
I'm Bender,
the fabulous
body-switching burglar.
285
00:14:36,700 --> 00:14:39,790
So you are.
However, you do
have Nikolai's body,
286
00:14:39,870 --> 00:14:41,330
and that's the part
we want to kill.
287
00:14:42,290 --> 00:14:43,290
(MOTOR RUNNING)
288
00:14:55,770 --> 00:14:56,850
Great food, huh?
289
00:14:57,180 --> 00:14:58,230
(BURPS)
290
00:14:58,310 --> 00:14:59,430
(ALL GROANING)
Ew!
291
00:14:59,560 --> 00:15:01,060
I'm sorry, Leela.
292
00:15:01,150 --> 00:15:03,860
I hope that didn't make you
ashamed to be seen with me.
293
00:15:04,110 --> 00:15:06,820
No, it only makes
you more attractive.
294
00:15:07,990 --> 00:15:09,570
(PEOPLE GASPING)
Ew!
295
00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:14,320
Oh! Did my bodily
infirmity embarrass you?
296
00:15:14,410 --> 00:15:15,410
Not at all.
297
00:15:15,490 --> 00:15:18,660
It's just another thing
that makes you
a very special lady.
298
00:15:18,790 --> 00:15:20,000
You mean, like my penis?
299
00:15:22,290 --> 00:15:25,340
(EXCLAIMS IN DISGUST)
Admit it!
You're disgusted by me!
300
00:15:25,420 --> 00:15:27,880
No,
you're disgusted by me!
301
00:15:27,960 --> 00:15:30,130
I'm as attracted to
you as I've ever been!
302
00:15:30,220 --> 00:15:31,300
Prove it!
303
00:15:33,010 --> 00:15:34,430
(PEOPLE SCREAMING)
304
00:15:39,350 --> 00:15:43,350
Well, Bender,
here's our apartment
that we live in every day.
305
00:15:44,940 --> 00:15:47,860
A floor?
We live like kings!
306
00:15:48,190 --> 00:15:49,400
Kings? Silence!
307
00:15:49,740 --> 00:15:51,400
Like you, I'm a common lout.
308
00:15:51,610 --> 00:15:53,280
Now fetch me some
working-class cognac
309
00:15:53,360 --> 00:15:55,820
from our brandy storeroom
that you know how to find.
310
00:15:55,910 --> 00:15:56,910
Uh...
311
00:16:03,250 --> 00:16:04,290
(SCREAMS)
312
00:16:04,380 --> 00:16:05,630
Relax, Bender.
313
00:16:05,710 --> 00:16:08,210
I'll dry up that leak
with this heating box.
314
00:16:09,340 --> 00:16:10,800
(GAS LEAKING)
315
00:16:12,050 --> 00:16:14,800
Ah, cigars.
Light me up, old friend.
316
00:16:20,560 --> 00:16:21,730
(PANTING)
317
00:16:27,440 --> 00:16:29,110
There you are,
Emperor Nikolai.
318
00:16:29,230 --> 00:16:30,940
It's time for your
speech to the U. N.
319
00:16:31,400 --> 00:16:32,490
What now?
320
00:16:34,240 --> 00:16:35,240
(SCREAMS)
321
00:16:38,280 --> 00:16:39,280
Miss Wong?
322
00:16:39,370 --> 00:16:41,700
No, Scruffy,
I am Washbucket.
323
00:16:41,790 --> 00:16:45,210
I love you.
Washbucket has
always loved you.
324
00:16:48,340 --> 00:16:49,590
This is wrong, Washbucket.
325
00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:52,260
Oh, it would be
sweet for a while,
326
00:16:52,340 --> 00:16:55,050
but in the back of our minds,
we'd know that I'm a man
327
00:16:55,130 --> 00:16:56,590
and you're
janitorial equipment.
328
00:16:56,890 --> 00:17:00,220
In another city,
we could be anyone we want!
329
00:17:00,770 --> 00:17:02,430
Go. Go now,
330
00:17:02,600 --> 00:17:04,060
before I beg you to stay.
331
00:17:11,280 --> 00:17:12,480
(CRYING)
332
00:17:13,280 --> 00:17:14,280
Yep.
333
00:17:16,160 --> 00:17:21,280
Please welcome
an insane dictator,
and one heck of a bowler,
334
00:17:21,370 --> 00:17:23,870
Emperor Nikolai!
335
00:17:26,330 --> 00:17:28,130
Thanks, Nixon.
How we doing?
336
00:17:28,210 --> 00:17:29,960
WOMAN: I love you,
Your Majesty!
337
00:17:30,040 --> 00:17:32,130
Shut up, Madame Ambassador!
I know it!
338
00:17:32,420 --> 00:17:33,510
Anyhow,
339
00:17:33,590 --> 00:17:34,970
(CLEARING THROAT)
340
00:17:35,470 --> 00:17:38,390
I'd now like to digress
from my prepared remarks
341
00:17:38,470 --> 00:17:39,720
to say I'm done!
342
00:17:39,800 --> 00:17:41,140
(ALL CHEERING)
343
00:17:42,270 --> 00:17:45,060
Ladies and gentlemen,
this robot is an impostor!
344
00:17:45,140 --> 00:17:46,390
(ALL GASPING)
345
00:17:47,440 --> 00:17:48,520
(EXCLAIMS)
346
00:17:50,020 --> 00:17:51,860
I shall enjoy this.
347
00:17:52,150 --> 00:17:53,570
Not me!
348
00:17:55,150 --> 00:17:57,610
That devil, Basil,
will kill our emperor.
349
00:17:57,700 --> 00:17:59,990
You're Robo-Hungarian?
350
00:18:00,070 --> 00:18:03,410
Yes. Our nation's
chief export is carnies.
351
00:18:03,490 --> 00:18:06,790
If only there were some way
I could get to the U. N.
To help.
352
00:18:06,870 --> 00:18:09,620
There is.
Get in, Nonchalanto.
353
00:18:09,710 --> 00:18:11,750
Bertha, no!
It would kill you!
354
00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:14,630
I have not so much
time left anyhow.
355
00:18:14,710 --> 00:18:18,760
But you could get a new body!
You could have a rich,
full life!
356
00:18:18,840 --> 00:18:22,260
I am trying to have
a rich, full life!
357
00:18:28,140 --> 00:18:30,100
Long live Robo-Hungary!
358
00:18:31,190 --> 00:18:32,360
(GROANING)
359
00:18:32,900 --> 00:18:34,190
(SCREAMING)
360
00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:42,120
Me!
Thank God you've come!
361
00:18:44,580 --> 00:18:46,910
This is for Big Bertha!
362
00:18:48,620 --> 00:18:51,370
That is not what
I meant to give you
for Big Bertha.
363
00:18:53,630 --> 00:18:55,750
(SIGHS) That was nice.
364
00:18:56,010 --> 00:18:57,170
Oh, yeah.
365
00:18:59,050 --> 00:19:00,050
(BOTH GASP)
366
00:19:04,350 --> 00:19:05,680
Ow! Ow!
(SCREAMS)
367
00:19:05,770 --> 00:19:06,770
(SHATTERS)
368
00:19:14,070 --> 00:19:15,230
(EXCLAIMS)
369
00:19:15,900 --> 00:19:18,900
Whoever you are,
you're the bravest robot
I've ever seen.
370
00:19:20,030 --> 00:19:21,610
I like killing brave things.
371
00:19:21,910 --> 00:19:25,120
Good!
Because I've got 20
of them per cubic meter.
372
00:19:29,910 --> 00:19:32,460
When I grow up,
I want to be a diplomat!
373
00:19:36,750 --> 00:19:39,710
Well, if there's one
thing I've learned,
it's a lesson.
374
00:19:39,800 --> 00:19:41,220
I believe this
belongs to you.
375
00:19:43,850 --> 00:19:45,800
I shall sell it to
help the common folk,
376
00:19:45,890 --> 00:19:47,850
now that I understand
their misery.
377
00:19:47,930 --> 00:19:49,100
Yeah, good luck with that.
378
00:19:49,350 --> 00:19:52,520
I must say, Hermes,
you've got
a smoking-hot body.
379
00:19:52,600 --> 00:19:54,480
(IN HERMES'S VOICE)
I was inspired by Amy.
380
00:19:55,190 --> 00:19:57,610
Wow! How'd you do it?
Well,
381
00:19:57,690 --> 00:20:00,690
there I was at Elzar's,
eating a nice pork sundae,
382
00:20:00,780 --> 00:20:02,780
and suddenly,
I just lost my appetite.
383
00:20:04,450 --> 00:20:05,450
Forever.
384
00:20:05,990 --> 00:20:07,620
Q to the E to the D!
385
00:20:07,950 --> 00:20:12,370
So it is possible for
us all to get back to
our original bodies?
386
00:20:12,460 --> 00:20:14,210
Stone-cold munching, Prof.
387
00:20:14,290 --> 00:20:17,130
Sweet Clyde,
characterize your
inversion theorem.
388
00:20:17,670 --> 00:20:20,510
Basically, no matter
how permuted-up
your minds are,
389
00:20:20,590 --> 00:20:23,680
they can be restored using,
at most, two extra players.
390
00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:28,890
And they say
pure math has no
real-world applications!
391
00:20:35,440 --> 00:20:36,730
(ALL CHEERING)
392
00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:39,190
Everybody back
in their zones?
393
00:20:39,280 --> 00:20:40,650
Yes sir!
Yes!
394
00:20:40,940 --> 00:20:44,490
Ah! My body may be old,
but it is mine.
395
00:20:44,820 --> 00:20:46,240
Brilliant work, Clyde!
396
00:20:46,320 --> 00:20:49,990
You'll win the NBA's highest
academic honor for this.
397
00:20:50,080 --> 00:20:51,910
Also,
I'm making you a duke.
398
00:20:52,330 --> 00:20:54,330
So long, filthy commoners!
399
00:20:54,420 --> 00:20:55,540
¡Adiós!
400
00:20:55,630 --> 00:20:56,830
(CHUCKLES)
401
00:20:56,920 --> 00:20:59,590
And I'm left
with the real jewels
safely inside...
402
00:20:59,920 --> 00:21:02,130
His compartment?
(GROANS)
403
00:21:03,260 --> 00:21:05,680
All right.
I'll need accomplices.
404
00:21:37,040 --> 00:21:38,040
ENGLISH - US - PSDH
29591
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