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1
00:00:24,440 --> 00:00:28,690
(GROANS) Oh, I fear
I may not survive this
war reenactment.
2
00:00:28,770 --> 00:00:31,860
I can't believe we're only
12 feet from the parking lot.
3
00:00:31,940 --> 00:00:35,490
(CHUCKLES) This is
every bit as fun
as the real Civil War.
4
00:00:35,570 --> 00:00:39,660
Not the Civil War, Private.
We're reenacting
the Sith-il War.
5
00:00:39,740 --> 00:00:41,740
Sith? What the Hoth?
6
00:00:41,830 --> 00:00:44,580
Enemy invaders!
Up in yonder sky!
7
00:00:59,140 --> 00:01:01,430
I am Darth Stroyer.
8
00:01:01,520 --> 00:01:05,230
Darth Stroyer?
That's the stupidest
name I've ever heard.
9
00:01:05,310 --> 00:01:06,440
Let's hear the rest.
10
00:01:07,310 --> 00:01:08,730
Darth Trocious.
11
00:01:09,360 --> 00:01:10,650
Darth Sploder.
12
00:01:11,280 --> 00:01:12,860
Darth Urderer.
13
00:01:13,690 --> 00:01:15,320
Darth lt-head.
14
00:01:18,490 --> 00:01:20,200
Company, attack!
15
00:01:20,450 --> 00:01:21,660
(ALL SHOUTING)
16
00:01:25,160 --> 00:01:27,960
Don't fire until you see
the greens of their eyes!
17
00:01:28,290 --> 00:01:29,580
It saves on bullets.
18
00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:37,010
(BARKING)
19
00:01:44,770 --> 00:01:47,770
I shall rip out your heart
and show it to you.
20
00:01:48,310 --> 00:01:49,310
(BEEPS)
21
00:01:49,400 --> 00:01:50,770
It is done.
22
00:01:50,900 --> 00:01:54,610
The candle that
burns twice as bright
burns half as long.
23
00:01:58,700 --> 00:01:59,860
(EXCLAIMS)
24
00:02:00,320 --> 00:02:01,740
(BEEPS)
You're dead.
25
00:02:01,830 --> 00:02:04,240
No, I'm just very old.
26
00:02:07,920 --> 00:02:10,170
Whoa. That's good acting.
27
00:02:10,250 --> 00:02:12,290
(GUN COCKING)
It's payback time,
Sploder.
28
00:02:13,170 --> 00:02:14,300
(BEEPS)
29
00:02:18,220 --> 00:02:22,970
Tell my mother to pick me up
outside Quiznos.
30
00:02:24,680 --> 00:02:26,140
That's three dead.
31
00:02:26,770 --> 00:02:28,310
Let's pick up the pace,
people.
32
00:02:28,390 --> 00:02:29,810
At this point in
the actual war,
33
00:02:29,900 --> 00:02:32,270
the death toll
was 98 million.
34
00:02:32,730 --> 00:02:35,900
(CHUCKLES) You humans
and your fragile organs.
35
00:02:35,980 --> 00:02:38,570
One little stab
to the goo, and...
(IMITATES SQUIRTING)
36
00:02:38,900 --> 00:02:39,990
(EXCLAIMS)
(BEEPS)
37
00:02:40,070 --> 00:02:41,950
You're dead, Earth man.
38
00:02:42,870 --> 00:02:44,910
Cruel fate, I'm dead.
39
00:02:45,120 --> 00:02:47,080
They're putting me
in my Sunday suit
40
00:02:47,200 --> 00:02:49,120
and shoving me
in a wooden box.
41
00:02:50,080 --> 00:02:54,090
Now they're lowering me
into the cold, cold ground.
42
00:02:54,380 --> 00:02:57,380
Hello,
here come the worms.
(LAUGHING)
43
00:02:58,340 --> 00:03:00,970
If you were really dead,
you wouldn't be
laughing so hard.
44
00:03:02,260 --> 00:03:05,050
Yeah, death's a big deal
to you flesh bags.
45
00:03:05,140 --> 00:03:08,140
But in case you
didn't notice,
I'm a robot.
46
00:03:08,230 --> 00:03:11,230
So? What if something heavy
fell on you, like a church?
47
00:03:11,310 --> 00:03:12,400
You could still die.
48
00:03:12,480 --> 00:03:13,690
Nuh-uh!
49
00:03:13,770 --> 00:03:16,980
My wireless backup unit
saves a copy of me every day.
50
00:03:17,070 --> 00:03:19,570
So, if my body gets killed,
big whoop,
51
00:03:19,650 --> 00:03:21,820
I just download
into another body.
52
00:03:21,910 --> 00:03:23,200
I'm immortal, baby.
53
00:03:23,280 --> 00:03:25,200
What? Then how come
you always scream
54
00:03:25,280 --> 00:03:26,910
so much when
you're in danger?
55
00:03:27,120 --> 00:03:29,660
I never said I wasn't
a drama queen.
56
00:03:30,330 --> 00:03:33,000
And the winner
of the war is...
57
00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:36,000
Let me just cross-check
my tabulation here.
58
00:03:36,460 --> 00:03:38,380
Factor in the corsages
for the widows...
59
00:03:38,460 --> 00:03:41,260
Hurry up,
you number-crunching
crumb-nuncher!
60
00:03:41,340 --> 00:03:43,720
Everybody but me
is dying of old age!
61
00:03:43,840 --> 00:03:45,140
Okay.
62
00:03:45,800 --> 00:03:50,600
The winners, at a net cost
of only $12 per life cut
tragically short,
63
00:03:50,680 --> 00:03:52,640
our Sith Overlords!
64
00:03:52,810 --> 00:03:54,020
Yeah!
Yes!
65
00:03:54,100 --> 00:03:56,560
Hot diggity. I mean,
66
00:03:56,650 --> 00:03:59,650
(IMITATES DARTH VADER)
Supreme diggity.
67
00:04:00,650 --> 00:04:05,200
ALL: Good war,
good war, good war...
68
00:04:08,580 --> 00:04:10,290
(ALL GROANING)
69
00:04:11,710 --> 00:04:15,330
It may have been a fake war,
but my scuffed knee
is all too real.
70
00:04:15,420 --> 00:04:19,090
I've got pains in joints
I had removed a century ago.
71
00:04:19,170 --> 00:04:22,760
Bender, bring me
my soft chair with
the wheels on it.
72
00:04:22,840 --> 00:04:25,340
Your wheelchair?
I don't need a wheelchair!
73
00:04:25,430 --> 00:04:27,260
The one with the wheels!
74
00:04:27,350 --> 00:04:29,430
Poor flimsy humans.
75
00:04:29,510 --> 00:04:32,020
Don't you wish you were
flawless like me?
76
00:04:32,100 --> 00:04:34,640
A towering inferno of
physical perfection?
77
00:04:34,730 --> 00:04:38,310
I hate to pop
your blimp-like ego,
but you are not perfect.
78
00:04:38,400 --> 00:04:39,940
Am so.
Are not.
79
00:04:40,030 --> 00:04:41,650
Is too!
Says who?
80
00:04:41,740 --> 00:04:45,700
Says the only human
whose opinion I even
remotely respect.
81
00:04:48,450 --> 00:04:52,450
Inspector 5,
the best inspector
a kid could want.
82
00:04:52,620 --> 00:04:54,870
The day I was built,
he looked me over,
83
00:04:55,040 --> 00:04:57,290
probably with tears
of pride in his eyes,
84
00:04:57,380 --> 00:04:59,340
and proclaimed
to all the world,
85
00:04:59,460 --> 00:05:01,460
by means of this
scrap of paper,
86
00:05:01,550 --> 00:05:05,420
that I was perfect and
infallible in every way.
87
00:05:06,010 --> 00:05:07,430
Hey, Mr. Perfect,
88
00:05:07,510 --> 00:05:09,180
you wet the chair.
89
00:05:09,260 --> 00:05:13,890
Huh? It wasn't me.
Must be some of that urine
you're all so proud of.
90
00:05:15,480 --> 00:05:17,350
That's not urine.
It's oil.
91
00:05:17,440 --> 00:05:20,690
Impossible.
I'm triple-sealed to
prevent any chance of...
92
00:05:20,770 --> 00:05:22,110
(SHRIEKS)
93
00:05:23,400 --> 00:05:25,110
You call that
an ink defense?
94
00:05:25,650 --> 00:05:26,780
(EXCLAIMS)
95
00:05:28,410 --> 00:05:29,950
Goodbye, friends.
96
00:05:32,200 --> 00:05:33,620
What could have
caused the leak?
97
00:05:33,700 --> 00:05:35,910
Excessive heat,
on account of
I'm so hot?
98
00:05:36,580 --> 00:05:37,870
Alas, no.
99
00:05:37,960 --> 00:05:42,340
Oh, Bender, I'm afraid it's
a symptom of a fatal defect.
100
00:05:42,420 --> 00:05:43,920
Yeah, fatal, schmatal.
101
00:05:44,010 --> 00:05:46,760
If I die, I can just
download my backup copy
102
00:05:46,840 --> 00:05:49,300
into a new,
equally fabulous body.
103
00:05:49,390 --> 00:05:54,430
That's just it. You can't!
You were built without
a backup unit!
104
00:05:55,930 --> 00:05:57,690
There's no backup
copy of me?
105
00:05:57,770 --> 00:06:00,400
That's what I just said,
you mortal coil.
106
00:06:00,650 --> 00:06:02,150
So, if I die...
107
00:06:02,230 --> 00:06:04,780
You die.
Or as you put it...
(RASPS)
108
00:06:06,610 --> 00:06:08,530
Excuse me for a moment.
109
00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:16,700
(SHOUTING) No!
110
00:06:22,670 --> 00:06:25,090
I can't believe it!
I'm gonna die!
111
00:06:25,170 --> 00:06:27,510
How much time
does he have left,
Professor?
112
00:06:27,590 --> 00:06:30,130
Between a minute
and a billion years.
113
00:06:30,340 --> 00:06:32,430
Well, at least you
can plan accordingly.
114
00:06:32,510 --> 00:06:34,010
Dying sucks butt!
115
00:06:34,100 --> 00:06:36,430
How do you living beings
cope with mortality?
116
00:06:36,520 --> 00:06:37,770
Violent outbursts.
117
00:06:37,890 --> 00:06:39,140
General sluttiness.
118
00:06:39,230 --> 00:06:41,310
Thanks to denial,
I'm immortal.
119
00:06:41,400 --> 00:06:43,480
Damn it,
I'm supposed
to be perfect!
120
00:06:43,570 --> 00:06:46,110
Inspector 5 gave me
his blessing!
121
00:06:46,190 --> 00:06:48,820
How could he bring me
into this world
knowing I would die?
122
00:06:48,900 --> 00:06:51,200
So you wish you
were never born, maybe?
123
00:06:51,280 --> 00:06:55,410
Yes, anything less
than immortality is
a complete waste of time!
124
00:06:55,490 --> 00:06:57,080
Then suicide it is.
125
00:06:57,160 --> 00:07:00,540
Step into my office.
I'll give you
a nice Kevorking.
126
00:07:00,620 --> 00:07:04,790
Not until I hunt down
Inspector 5 and beat
an explanation out of him!
127
00:07:04,880 --> 00:07:07,630
I'm all for a good beating,
but you'll never find him.
128
00:07:07,710 --> 00:07:09,720
Product inspectors
are bureaucrats,
129
00:07:09,800 --> 00:07:12,550
faceless bean-counters
who blend into the woodwork.
130
00:07:12,800 --> 00:07:14,220
I beg to differ.
131
00:07:14,390 --> 00:07:16,510
Stinking bureaucrats.
I hate them!
132
00:07:17,020 --> 00:07:19,930
Then again,
you might be able
to find Inspector 5
133
00:07:20,020 --> 00:07:22,190
with the help of another
seasoned bureaucrat.
134
00:07:22,520 --> 00:07:24,110
Hermes, old pal.
135
00:07:24,190 --> 00:07:27,900
Old pal? 8.5 seconds ago,
you said you hated me.
136
00:07:27,980 --> 00:07:29,940
Time heals all wounds.
137
00:07:30,030 --> 00:07:32,150
You know what?
I will help you,
138
00:07:32,240 --> 00:07:35,320
but only to prove I'm not
just a paper-pushing
file jockey.
139
00:07:35,410 --> 00:07:37,620
Will you be taking your
portable filing cabinet?
140
00:07:37,740 --> 00:07:39,040
None of your beeswax.
141
00:07:41,210 --> 00:07:43,620
I'll only be away an hour,
but I'm counting on you
142
00:07:43,710 --> 00:07:46,040
to do the all-critical
filing in my absence.
143
00:07:46,130 --> 00:07:48,460
Shall we review
alphabetical order?
144
00:07:48,550 --> 00:07:49,920
(SINGING)
A, B, C, D...
145
00:07:50,010 --> 00:07:51,340
Get out of my office!
146
00:07:55,890 --> 00:07:58,930
Yes, I'd like to request
a death certificate.
147
00:08:00,430 --> 00:08:02,430
Sorry,
that's Building C.
148
00:08:02,730 --> 00:08:05,900
The Central Bureaucracy
maintains records
on all bureaucrats.
149
00:08:06,020 --> 00:08:08,150
We should be able to
look up Inspector 5.
150
00:08:12,740 --> 00:08:14,820
Application for
ingress approved.
151
00:08:15,070 --> 00:08:16,870
And the other
potential entrant?
152
00:08:17,580 --> 00:08:18,830
He's my pencil sharpener.
153
00:08:18,950 --> 00:08:20,240
You betcha!
154
00:08:20,870 --> 00:08:22,450
(WHIRRING)
155
00:08:23,920 --> 00:08:25,170
Proceed.
156
00:08:40,060 --> 00:08:42,850
I maintain a cubicle here
for weekend getaways.
157
00:08:47,940 --> 00:08:50,980
Wow. Until now, I thought
giant cubes were exciting.
158
00:08:55,530 --> 00:08:58,950
(PEOPLE SCREAMING)
159
00:08:59,780 --> 00:09:00,950
(MAN SHOUTS)
160
00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:02,660
(PEOPLE EXCLAIMING)
161
00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:08,790
I did like the part
where they screamed.
162
00:09:11,170 --> 00:09:13,880
This is mine,
right next to
the center square.
163
00:09:13,970 --> 00:09:18,180
Sorry, Hermes,
I drank all your Wite-Out.
(LAUGHING)
164
00:09:19,180 --> 00:09:22,510
Once I log in, I can access
Inspector 5's profile.
165
00:09:25,690 --> 00:09:26,730
(BUZZER SOUNDS)
166
00:09:26,810 --> 00:09:28,400
Damn it, it won't go on!
167
00:09:28,480 --> 00:09:29,980
That's because
you're not me.
168
00:09:30,070 --> 00:09:31,980
Hooray, it won't go on!
169
00:09:32,070 --> 00:09:33,860
The bureaucra-scan
won't let anyone
170
00:09:33,940 --> 00:09:35,690
but the assigned
bureaucrat log in.
171
00:09:37,990 --> 00:09:39,570
(AUTOMATED VOICE READING)
172
00:09:39,660 --> 00:09:42,790
Also, you have
a rectangular mass
in your colon.
173
00:09:42,870 --> 00:09:45,660
That's a calculator.
I ate it to gain its power.
174
00:09:45,750 --> 00:09:49,750
You locate Inspector 5
while I slip into my
ass-kicking feet.
175
00:09:51,130 --> 00:09:54,090
(GASPS) Sweet file-not-found
of Puget Sound.
176
00:09:54,170 --> 00:09:55,880
His record's been blanked.
177
00:09:56,010 --> 00:09:57,130
Oh, man!
178
00:09:57,220 --> 00:10:00,840
How am I gonna find
some anonymous guy
I don't know anything about?
179
00:10:00,930 --> 00:10:04,770
I recommend the men's room
at the TWA Terminal.
(LAUGHING)
180
00:10:14,860 --> 00:10:17,400
Okay, just file it
alphabetically.
181
00:10:17,490 --> 00:10:19,490
(SINGING)
A, B, C, D...
182
00:10:20,870 --> 00:10:23,080
Well, this requires
a little extra thought.
183
00:10:26,200 --> 00:10:27,710
I'm a natural.
184
00:10:28,460 --> 00:10:31,750
The information we need
will be here, in the
physical files.
185
00:10:32,040 --> 00:10:35,340
Those bastards won't know
what leafed through them.
186
00:10:46,060 --> 00:10:47,270
It's on.
187
00:10:47,680 --> 00:10:48,850
(GRUNTS)
188
00:10:51,520 --> 00:10:53,480
No! This is impossible!
189
00:10:53,690 --> 00:10:55,400
Quit blacking out
and look at this.
190
00:10:55,610 --> 00:10:59,570
"Inspector 1, 2, 3, 4, 6."
191
00:10:59,900 --> 00:11:02,240
There's no trace
of Inspector 5!
192
00:11:02,320 --> 00:11:04,030
But 5's the one we want!
193
00:11:04,120 --> 00:11:08,160
Maybe if I kicked
the asses of Inspector 2,
plus Inspector 3...
194
00:11:08,250 --> 00:11:10,460
Addition never
solved anything, man.
195
00:11:10,540 --> 00:11:12,920
Let's cut our losses
and go home.
196
00:11:16,090 --> 00:11:17,840
So I'm doomed to die,
197
00:11:17,920 --> 00:11:20,920
and I'll never even
get to punch
whoever's responsible?
198
00:11:21,680 --> 00:11:23,010
What's the point?
199
00:11:23,220 --> 00:11:26,680
Bender, no! Suicide isn't
necessarily the answer.
200
00:11:26,770 --> 00:11:30,270
It's not a suicide booth,
you lard-ass.
It's a phone booth.
201
00:11:31,230 --> 00:11:33,020
They have phones
in booths now?
202
00:11:33,100 --> 00:11:35,940
Finally, I don't have to
lug this cell phone around.
203
00:11:42,360 --> 00:11:45,070
Who the hell is this?
How did you get this number?
204
00:11:45,160 --> 00:11:46,660
Is this the robot company?
205
00:11:46,740 --> 00:11:49,370
'Cause I have a complaint
about a defective robot.
206
00:11:49,450 --> 00:11:50,830
His name is me!
207
00:11:51,000 --> 00:11:53,420
A defective robot, you say?
208
00:11:55,340 --> 00:11:57,000
Stay right there, dearie.
209
00:11:57,090 --> 00:11:59,800
I'll have tech support
take care of you.
210
00:12:01,630 --> 00:12:03,550
Well, things are
starting to look up.
211
00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:04,720
Look up!
212
00:12:10,310 --> 00:12:12,230
Who did you call?
Dial-a-bomb?
213
00:12:12,310 --> 00:12:15,600
No, I just told
the robot company
I was defective.
214
00:12:15,730 --> 00:12:17,860
You dumb cocktail shaker!
215
00:12:17,940 --> 00:12:20,900
Mom won't allow
a defective product
to tarnish her good name!
216
00:12:20,990 --> 00:12:22,030
She'll kill you!
217
00:12:22,110 --> 00:12:24,740
Big whoop. I'll just
download into a new...
218
00:12:24,820 --> 00:12:27,530
Oh, right.
If I die, I die.
219
00:12:27,740 --> 00:12:29,120
Speaking of which...
(MACHINE GUN FIRING)
220
00:12:29,200 --> 00:12:32,000
You're right.
You're right.
You're right.
221
00:12:33,160 --> 00:12:36,080
That's what you get
for calling tech support.
222
00:12:44,880 --> 00:12:46,180
(BOTH PANTING)
223
00:12:46,260 --> 00:12:48,970
I can't run anymore.
I'll have to skip.
224
00:12:57,190 --> 00:12:58,270
Just a few more feet.
225
00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:01,360
We have to get to
that pile of dead bears
by 7:38.
226
00:13:01,440 --> 00:13:05,200
A pile of dead bears can
only mean one thing.
But what?
227
00:13:08,830 --> 00:13:10,530
It's the 7:38!
228
00:13:10,950 --> 00:13:12,080
Jump!
229
00:13:15,040 --> 00:13:17,040
BENDER: Shoot!
Someone said shoot.
230
00:13:36,060 --> 00:13:37,390
Well, we're boned.
231
00:13:37,480 --> 00:13:38,560
No, we're not!
232
00:13:38,650 --> 00:13:39,980
We just got to limbo.
233
00:13:40,060 --> 00:13:43,860
But I'm not
designed to bend that low,
not without limbo music.
234
00:13:44,360 --> 00:13:45,940
(BULLETS STRIKING
RHYTHMICALLY)
235
00:13:46,030 --> 00:13:47,530
That'll do it!
236
00:13:47,740 --> 00:13:49,360
Ow! Ow! Ow! (GRUNTS)
237
00:13:51,450 --> 00:13:52,660
We're gonna get fired.
238
00:13:52,740 --> 00:13:53,910
Someone said fire.
239
00:14:04,130 --> 00:14:05,300
(BENDER WHOOPING)
240
00:14:05,380 --> 00:14:06,510
We did it!
241
00:14:06,590 --> 00:14:08,340
Twelve straight hours
of limbo.
242
00:14:08,430 --> 00:14:10,220
I haven't done that
since my honeymoon.
243
00:14:10,300 --> 00:14:12,680
Hermes, Hermes,
remember that
flock of bats?
244
00:14:12,760 --> 00:14:13,850
I sure do.
245
00:14:13,930 --> 00:14:15,100
That was fun.
246
00:14:16,100 --> 00:14:17,310
BENDER: Where are we?
247
00:14:17,440 --> 00:14:18,810
I have no idea.
248
00:14:20,440 --> 00:14:21,440
(BOTH EXCLAIM)
249
00:14:27,280 --> 00:14:30,740
Hey,
we're just a stone's throw
from Tijuana.
250
00:14:30,820 --> 00:14:31,910
See?
251
00:14:33,580 --> 00:14:34,790
(MAN SPEAKING SPANISH)
252
00:14:34,870 --> 00:14:39,670
A rock has fallen here,
in the outskirts of Tijuana.
253
00:14:39,960 --> 00:14:41,580
Is it within
the city limit?
254
00:14:41,670 --> 00:14:43,250
I think, yes.
255
00:14:43,340 --> 00:14:44,380
Told you.
256
00:14:44,460 --> 00:14:46,340
Hey, you want to
celebrate our escape?
257
00:14:46,420 --> 00:14:49,340
Maybe grab a shot
of tequila and take in
a big-league cockfight?
258
00:14:49,430 --> 00:14:52,220
Sure. No, wait.
I was built in Tijuana.
259
00:14:52,300 --> 00:14:54,890
Maybe Inspector 5
still works there.
260
00:14:54,970 --> 00:14:59,940
He better do some explaining
before I mash up
some face guacamole.
261
00:15:02,650 --> 00:15:05,650
He's Mexican, I'm Mexican.
Let me handle this.
262
00:15:06,570 --> 00:15:08,150
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
263
00:15:09,650 --> 00:15:10,860
Si!
264
00:15:11,360 --> 00:15:12,570
Ouch-o!
265
00:15:14,830 --> 00:15:16,580
Here are our passports,
visas,
266
00:15:16,660 --> 00:15:18,370
and Homeland Security
permission slips,
267
00:15:18,450 --> 00:15:20,210
notarized and starched.
268
00:15:22,170 --> 00:15:24,960
Okay. I also would
have accepted a bribe.
269
00:15:26,500 --> 00:15:28,260
Nice work, butterball.
270
00:15:28,380 --> 00:15:31,550
You know,
I was in Italy last week.
(GASPS)
271
00:15:35,680 --> 00:15:38,020
My birthplace.
It's closed!
272
00:15:38,180 --> 00:15:39,680
There's not even
a shrine to me.
273
00:15:39,770 --> 00:15:42,600
With a gift shop,
selling piñatas of me!
274
00:15:42,690 --> 00:15:44,020
End of the line, man.
275
00:15:44,110 --> 00:15:47,110
Come on, we can still catch
a twi-night double cockfight.
276
00:15:47,190 --> 00:15:50,030
No, wait! What's that
in the Mexican garbage?
277
00:15:50,110 --> 00:15:52,150
Looks like
a half-eaten cheese diaper.
278
00:15:52,240 --> 00:15:53,360
No, next to that.
279
00:15:55,530 --> 00:15:57,870
A half-eaten
employee directory.
280
00:15:59,540 --> 00:16:01,460
Inspector 5's home address!
281
00:16:01,540 --> 00:16:04,210
His ass-ias is gracias!
282
00:16:15,640 --> 00:16:17,350
Where are you hiding,
you coward?
283
00:16:17,430 --> 00:16:19,600
Get out here and get
murdered like a man!
284
00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:24,560
Bender, I'm afraid
our search is at an end.
He's obviously long gone.
285
00:16:24,650 --> 00:16:25,980
Oh, yeah?
286
00:16:26,060 --> 00:16:28,570
Well, maybe this is
him in a costume!
287
00:16:29,230 --> 00:16:32,490
I'm gonna squeeze you
out of there like
Tijuana toothpaste!
288
00:16:38,990 --> 00:16:41,500
Okay, Bender,
you're mortal.
289
00:16:41,580 --> 00:16:44,120
And, okay,
Inspector 5 screwed up.
290
00:16:44,210 --> 00:16:47,420
But that just makes
the time you have left
all the more precious.
291
00:16:47,590 --> 00:16:51,710
Do you really want to waste
the rest of your life
in a bitter, homicidal rage?
292
00:16:51,800 --> 00:16:54,340
No! Yes!
293
00:16:55,300 --> 00:16:57,430
I don't know!
294
00:17:05,060 --> 00:17:08,110
Why?
Why did he do this to me?
295
00:17:08,480 --> 00:17:11,440
All I wanted was
a little quality control.
296
00:17:11,610 --> 00:17:14,780
But he didn't care enough.
And now I'm gonna die!
297
00:17:15,320 --> 00:17:18,700
I deserve better!
I'm Bender, damn it!
298
00:17:18,780 --> 00:17:20,910
I'm Bender!
299
00:17:21,410 --> 00:17:23,040
(SOBBING)
300
00:17:23,120 --> 00:17:26,000
There, there, man.
It's gonna be okay.
301
00:17:26,080 --> 00:17:30,250
You are Bender,
which is something
Inspector 5 will never be.
302
00:17:31,630 --> 00:17:34,010
You know what?
You're right.
303
00:17:34,090 --> 00:17:36,050
He was just
a stupid bureaucrat.
304
00:17:36,130 --> 00:17:38,340
A stupid,
paper-pushing bureaucrat.
305
00:17:38,430 --> 00:17:41,050
A stupid l-dotting,
chair-squashing...
306
00:17:41,140 --> 00:17:42,430
(CLEARS THROAT)
Oh.
307
00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:45,020
No offense, Hermes.
You're not like that.
308
00:17:45,100 --> 00:17:47,890
I mean,
you're exactly like that,
but you're okay!
309
00:17:47,980 --> 00:17:51,730
In fact, I'm putting you
on the do-not-kill list.
310
00:17:53,070 --> 00:17:55,860
Come on, fellow mortal.
We're in Tijuana.
311
00:17:55,950 --> 00:17:57,490
I want to live a little.
312
00:17:58,160 --> 00:18:01,370
Help! I'm gonna die!
That's the opposite
of what I want!
313
00:18:06,870 --> 00:18:08,370
Quick, run out the back!
314
00:18:08,460 --> 00:18:11,250
I'll hack into
Inspector 5's terminal
and fake your death,
315
00:18:11,340 --> 00:18:12,710
so they'll call
off the kill-bots.
316
00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:14,710
You know that
terminal is unhackable!
317
00:18:14,840 --> 00:18:16,920
I'm not leaving you,
and that's final!
318
00:18:17,510 --> 00:18:18,630
Good luck, buddy.
319
00:18:29,850 --> 00:18:31,560
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Bender terminated.
320
00:18:31,650 --> 00:18:32,940
Bender saved.
321
00:18:35,190 --> 00:18:37,900
(BEEPING)
Cease fire.
Mom called off the attack.
322
00:18:37,990 --> 00:18:40,530
Although I don't
see how it's her.
Someone said, "Howitzer!"
323
00:18:43,200 --> 00:18:44,580
Yeah!
324
00:18:44,660 --> 00:18:46,540
All right! Yeah!
325
00:18:48,370 --> 00:18:49,540
(GROANS)
326
00:18:56,300 --> 00:18:57,460
(BENDER GASPS)
327
00:18:59,760 --> 00:19:00,880
He did it!
328
00:19:01,510 --> 00:19:04,260
And he's not looking back
at that cool explosion.
329
00:19:04,470 --> 00:19:06,220
He's a hero!
330
00:19:10,270 --> 00:19:12,150
(ALARM BLARING)
What's happening?
331
00:19:12,230 --> 00:19:15,230
The phone's
been disconnected,
the ship's repossessed,
332
00:19:15,320 --> 00:19:16,980
and Zoidberg's
getting overcooked!
333
00:19:20,450 --> 00:19:22,240
This place never changes.
334
00:19:22,370 --> 00:19:24,870
Leela, what in the name
of Jah happened?
335
00:19:25,030 --> 00:19:28,500
Too much papers!
Not enough hiding plants!
336
00:19:28,580 --> 00:19:29,660
It's all right.
337
00:19:29,750 --> 00:19:32,540
This place just needs
a one-hour bureaucratizing.
338
00:19:37,340 --> 00:19:39,010
You make it
look so easy.
339
00:19:39,090 --> 00:19:41,720
I've smoked a lot
of paperwork in my day.
340
00:19:41,800 --> 00:19:43,180
Hey, Bender,
did you ever find
341
00:19:43,260 --> 00:19:45,050
that inspector guy
you were looking for?
342
00:19:45,140 --> 00:19:47,390
Nah, but thanks
to this knucklehead,
343
00:19:47,520 --> 00:19:49,770
I did find a new
outlook on life.
344
00:19:49,930 --> 00:19:51,350
It's precious and sacred.
345
00:19:51,440 --> 00:19:54,400
And you only get
so many millions of
years on this Earth.
346
00:19:54,480 --> 00:19:56,110
So, let's get brick-faced!
347
00:19:56,440 --> 00:19:57,730
(ALL CHEERING)
348
00:20:04,620 --> 00:20:06,950
(NURSERY RHYME PLAYING)
349
00:20:09,290 --> 00:20:12,290
(WOMAN SINGING)
Little bird, little bird
Fly through my window
350
00:20:12,370 --> 00:20:18,460
Little bird, little bird
Fly through my window
351
00:20:18,550 --> 00:20:21,260
Find molasses candy
352
00:20:21,340 --> 00:20:23,590
(BURPS)
Through my window,
my sugar lump
353
00:20:23,680 --> 00:20:26,720
Fly through my window,
my sugar lump
354
00:20:26,800 --> 00:20:29,560
Find molasses candy
355
00:20:33,520 --> 00:20:42,860
Chickadee, chickadee
Fly through my window
356
00:20:42,950 --> 00:20:45,530
Find molasses candy
357
00:20:45,620 --> 00:20:47,870
Through my window,
my sugar lump
358
00:20:47,950 --> 00:20:50,700
Fly through my window,
my sugar lump
359
00:20:50,790 --> 00:20:53,830
Find molasses candy
360
00:21:37,290 --> 00:21:38,290
ENGLISH - US - PSDH
26550
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