All language subtitles for New.Amsterdam.S01E17.WEBRip.x264-ION10

.

[dramatic music]

- I gotta get
this hospital ready for

the worst storm that
we've seen in

I don't know how many years.

- If you pull me off,
won't I die?

- If we stay here,
you definitely will.

- [screams in agony]

- Get me a gurney!

- If people can't get to
this hospital,

then we need to bring
this hospital to them.

- Max, as your doctor,

I cannot let you traipse
through a storm.

- And I will take care
of myself

because I love my doctor.

- Honey, I'm sorry,

but it's never gonna work out
between you and Max.

- We need to talk.

This thing between us...

[ominous tone]

[tense music]

♪

Max.

- Uh, we lost power.

- Shouldn't the generator
be coming on?

- Any second.

- What's happening?

- Um, sorry folks.
It appears we lost power,

but the generator should
be kicking in shortly.

- Is everyone all right?

- My baby's cold.
C4an I get a blanket?

- Newborn?

- My husband couldn't get here
for her birth,

and we've been discharged.

The insurance company
wouldn't let us stay.

- It's okay.
Here, just take my coat,

and I'll get you a blanket
as soon as possible.

- Is the heat coming back on?
- Yeah, shortly.

- Come on in, guys.
Just head right over here.

We're gonna fix this.

- Max.
- Yeah?

- The generator should have
kicked in by now.

The circulatory machines,
the ventilators--

- Okay, just do
a quick status run,

check all the wards,
and I'll meet you in the ED.

- No--should someone else--
- I'm fine.

[suspenseful music]

♪

- You wanted to tell me
something.

- It can wait.

♪

[alarm bells ringing]

- [panting]

Henry.
- Dr. Goodwin.

- How many on maintenance
tonight?

- You're looking at him.

- Why isn't the generator
coming on?

- I'm on my way to find out,
but it looks like

the entire lower Manhattan grid
is down.

- Every minute
we're without power...

- No, I get it.
- Patients will die.

- Status?
- Improvising.

Call it out, April.

- Mr. Ayers,
blood pressure: 130/75.

Pupils sluggish to react.

- We have someone on each of
the ventilator patients

working an AMBU bag,
taking pulses,

visually monitoring stats
and meds...

- Uh, what do you need?

- Besides power?
More people.

Since the storm, we've been
working with a skeleton crew.

- Thermal socks.
We have to clean the feet.

- Keep his clothes on
for the time being.

- No monitor. No suction.

- No cautery.

- But you still have me, right?

- Oh, yeah, holding firm.

- Hey, can we get
a battery-powered fan?

- Reynolds.

- It's all good, Dr. Sharpe.

I'm, uh, holding Hugh's heart
together with my fingers,

but without power, we've got no
cardiopulmonary bypass...

- No way to titrate anesthesia.

- We can't operate
without them.

- Max is working on
the generator.

- All right.

- How are you doing, sir?

- Oh, you know...meh.

- Can I get another
micro-insertion kit?

- On it.

♪

- [grunts]
- Hey.

How you doing in there, Burl?

- [grunting]
Get me out of here.

It's tight!
- Yeah.

Hey, guys, is there any way
to slide this out

while the power's off?

- We're safer with him
in the machine.

- Danny, come on.
- He's here 'cause

he attacked a guard.
- No, he's not.

He's here because a guard
bashed his head in.

- In self-defense.
- Oh, give me a...

- The guard is my friend.
Your patient went off.

- [grunting and moaning]

- Hey, hey, Burl--Burl, listen.

Take a few deep breaths for me,
okay, buddy?

- Deep breaths?
- We're all in this together.

- All right?
Burl?

- Iggy.
- Yeah.

- It's midnight. Why wasn't
this scheduled for earlier?

- We only bring the prisoners
at night, ma'am,

for everyone's safety.

- Can you handle this?

- Sure, we're all in this
together.

- Yeah.

Okay, Burl.

- Get me out!

[echoing thud]

[wind whistling]

[echoing thud]

[echoing thud]
- Oh, um,

where's that sound coming from?
- Elevator?

- Can you tell everyone
to get to ED?

I'll be there in a minute.

[echoing thud]

[thudding continues]

Hello?
- Helen?

- Vijay?

- Yes, I'm here with
Dr. Hartman.

- You know my name's Clint,
right?

- Are you okay?
- Yes, we are fine.

- You don't look fine.
Are you claustrophobic?

- Hardly.
It's been a very long day,

and I'm stuck in this
very small box with you.

- Helen, why hasn't
the generator kicked in?

- We're working on it.
- Keep working on it.

- [exhales]

- [groans]
- What? Talk to me, Henry.

- I mean, this thing took
a big hit

during Hurricane Sandy.

A lot these parts, they should
have been traded out.

- And they weren't?
- It doesn't look like it.

I mean, this fuel oil pump
is failed,

this main pipe that's
still cracked...

- So?

- So, I could really use
some more light down here.

Wait.
Wait.

I just remembered something.

I hope it's still here.

[dramatic music]

♪

This...this could buy us
some time.

- What is it?
- Emergency battery.

They got it after Sandy.

- Is it enough to power
the hospital?

- No way, but it could
cover a floor for an hour.

♪

- Okay, we got a battery.
That'll buy us

a little breathing room
while Henry keeps working.

- Reynolds is literally
holding a man's heart

together with his fingers.
- Yeah, I understand.

- And we got a NICU
full of babies

getting colder by the minute.

- I can buy us a little juice
for one floor for one hour.

- Okay, so ICU, ventilators,
IV pumps?

- Yes.
- Yes?

What do you mean "yes"?

We need to pick one.
We need to triage.

- Nope.
- Shouldn't we be evacuating?

- No.
- To where? How?

In this storm, we can't even
get across the street.

- Yeah, it's true.
She's right.

We're one of the only hospitals
with the, um...

I was gonna say "with
the lights still on," but...

- We could move everybody
to the same floor.

- Yes.
- That's crazy.

- Well, why?
We're not at capacity.

- Uh...
- Look, it's Helen's idea.

- But that's only because
you won't let me triage.

- No triage. Look, Henry is
having difficulty seeing.

Would you grab a flashlight
and meet us down there?

- Yeah, yes.

- Max.
- Huh?

- We cannot--
- We will.

- Yo, hand me those
soft-grip pliers.

- Yeah, yeah, you got it.

Going with the soft-grip.
Here you go.

So, are you gonna check
those rotors or what?

- Yeah, I'm doing it now.
- Yeah, cool.

Boom.

- I'm very impressed.
- Yeah, are you?

Well, that's what growing up
on a farm does for a man.

- Teaches him
to say "boom" a lot?

- Yeah.
- Hmm.

- These rotors seem fine,

but the connections
are damaged.

- Tweak the rotors.
- If I could just

get them to turn a little bit,
there might be enough power

left inside the system f--

[shouts]
- Whoa!

[Henry screaming]
- Henry!

- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa!

.

- One, two, three...

- Nothing.

- Come on, Henry.
Stay with me.

Stay with me, come on.
Three...four...

- Come on, Henry.
- Five, six...

- Seven, either, nine, ten.

- No, nothing.
Let me get an AED--

- No, no, no.
There's no time.

Here we go.
[exhales deeply]

- [grunts]

- All right.
- Yeah?

Oh, come on, Henry.
Going again.

Yeah?

- Nothing.
No, Max, that's enough.

- No, one more try,
one more try.

Come on, Henry.

[grunts]

- [gasps]

- NICU and ICU
are priority zones.

- But they're different floors.

We could move the babies
to the ICU.

- And everyone else?

- Yeah, move everyone
to the ICU, all the patients.

Keep the NICU separated,

and bring the people up
from the lobby.

- We can turn off
all nonessentials,

convert IV drips
to subcutaneous injections.

- What about Reynolds' man
in the OR?

- I can help with that.
- Go ahead.

[banging]

Wha--what happened?

- He was electrocuted,
v-fib arrest

with ROSC after
pericardial thump.

He should be okay,
but we need to monitor

his rhythm and treat
the burns on his hands.

- All right, okay.
So, no generator?

- Not unless you can fix it.

- Guys, I may know someone
who can.

- Who?

- Well, he's, um...

He's currently stuck
in an MRI machine.

- The Rikers patient?
- Yes, the Rikers patient.

But he used to work for DWP,
he's smart...

- Okay, great.
- Yeah.

Full disclosure, though,

he sort of murdered
his coworker.

- Oh, my God.
- Right.

But it wasn't premeditated.
He's not a psychopath.

He just has behavioral issues.

- A rather big one,
don't you think?

- Yeah.

I'll take full responsibility.

Plus, there's a guard there,
so....

it's our best shot.

[compelling music]

♪

- Keep this tray in place.

- His blood pressure's dropped
down to 90/64.

- Hang in there, Hugh.
- Is that a fence joke?

- Just keep talking.

Make a list of all the things
you're gonna do

with your husband when
you get home.

- Scrub the baseboards,
fold the towels...

though, Eric always says
three folds is overkill.

- Eric can have an opinion
on three folds

when he starts doing laundry.

- Good point.

You have to help me remember
to tell him all this

if I make it.

- You're gonna make it.

- BP's dropped to 82/40.

We need to do something now.

- Hypothermic coma.

Lower his body temp
to near freezing

and slow his metabolism.

- Wasn't I freezing outside?

- No, no, no,
this will be controlled.

I'm afraid it's
our only option.

- Respectfully disagree.

- You bring me some power?

- No, but we can do
his surgery right now.

- With what?

- We have all the equipment
we need here.

I worked in far worse
conditions in Afghanistan.

- Dr. Candelario,
this is my patient, my OR.

- Your OR has decent lighting
and electricity.

We can save this man,

but I'm gonna need you
to let go.

Literally.

- Go ahead with the IV,
it'll help BP...

- We'll have battery power
at any moment.

It's all right.
We're all gonna get there.

Will you just take your time,
please?

And don't panic!

[indistinct chatter]

- Will you hurry up?

- Take your time.

- Ugh, I just wanna
get out of here.

- What's going on here?

- Do you know what's
going on here?

[indistinct chatter continues]

- Calm down, okay?

- Everyone...

Hey!
[bellowing] Hey!

We have light.
Heat will follow.

I know that the circumstances
are less than ideal, but we--

- [moans]

- Hey, there's something wrong
with this woman.

[panicked chatter]

- Help that lady.
Help that lady.

It's a baby.
- [crying]

- Agnes.

- I'll hold her.

- She was complaining of
a headache earlier.

- Want me to get Dr. Kapoor?

- He's stuck in an elevator...
With Hartman.

[baby crying]

You're gonna have to take care
of her.

[tense music]

♪

- It's all right, Dr. Sharpe.
I've got her.

♪

- You can write
.6 mg per minute.

- Confirming he said he was
162 pounds?

- Confirmed.

- I've never managed
anesthesia levels

without a monitor before.

- Hold my beer.

- That's okay.

Though neither of you
learned these techniques

in medical school,
I can assure you

they've been practiced
for ages.

That said,
you may wanna stand back.

[hammer whooshes, thuds]

[exciting jazz music]

♪

- Hello, Agnes.

- Hi, Dr. Kapoor.
Are you all right?

- I'm fine. Better now.

- I'm here too.
- Yes, he's here too.

- I need your help.

- [together]
Mine?

- Both of you, I think.

- What's the matter with her?

- She gave birth yesterday,
complained of a headache,

then collapsed when we moved
everyone up to the ICU.

- Have you assessed
her reflexes?

- She has a motor deficit
of the left upper extremity

and left lower extremity,
sensory intact.

- It sounds like
an amniotic stroke.

- What do I do?

- Nothing. There's nothing
you can do,

not until the power
comes back on.

- Get a 60cc syringe,

a 7 French catheter with
a metal tip, and a magnet.

- A magnet?
- Yes. Hurry.

- Okay, you're kidding, right?

- The woman will die
if we don't try to help her.

- Yeah, but we don't have
the tools.

- You don't have the tools.

[eerie music]

♪

- Where are
your maintenance people?

- All but one were sent home,
and he's hurt.

- Huh.

Hurt trying to do the job
you want me to do?

- Afraid so.

- Is this your idea?
- Not remotely.

- I'm gonna need a set
of plans.

- For the generator?

- For the hospital.

♪

[chuckles darkly]
Not exactly state of the art.

- Yeah.

What exactly do you need
the plans for?

- He doesn't.

- Hey, nothing gets fixed
in a vacuum.

An old building...

Could be a wiring issue.

Your man get fried on the pump?

- Honestly, I'm not sure.

- If you want me to,
I can fix it.

I'm gonna need a set of plans,
and um...

And a reduced sentence.

- Burl...

- Pardon from the governor
works too.

- Okay, we're done here.
Let's go.

- Hey, hey, hey.
Hold on.

Well, how much longer
do you think

the guards and the prisoners
are gonna play nice

if they're freezing to death?
- Look, Burl,

I'm not in a position
to negotiate terms.

- Well, then I guess
people are gonna die.

- Hold on.

No, but you don't
want that, Burl.

None of us want to lose anyone.

Now, this man, whom I know
to be a good man,

he doesn't trust you.

But that's
a familiar scenario, isn't it?

- You could be a hero tonight,
Burl.

I'm trusting you
to come through for everyone.

- Has anyone ever said that
to you before?

Has anyone ever give you
that opportunity?

Burl, you said
you wanted to change, right?

This is it.
This is where it starts.

[solemn music]

♪

- Okay.

I'll help.

But I need those plans...

And these off.
- No way.

- Can't work tied up.

♪

- Okay, there's a set of plans
in my office closet.

- Okay.

- He's playing you, man.

- Maybe, but tonight's
not gonna end well for anyone

if he can't get
this thing fixed, so Reyes,

please remove his restraints.

- [clears throat]

♪

[grunts]

♪

.

- Right ventricle's exposed.

- Lung sounds bilateral.

- In a traditional surgery,
this is where

I'd stop the heart
from beating.

- But we can't do that.
- No, we can't.

- But you've been holding
the heart for a long time.

Perhaps you've got
the rhythm down, right?

- You want me to time
each suture

to the relaxation phase.

- Exactly.

[heart beats slowly]

Time to let go.

[dramatic music]

♪

- [exhales]

- Um...

Can you slow him down
a bit more, Alicia?

Give me time to sew?
- I'll try.

- Kat, I'm gonna need
a 3.0 Prolene

on a needle driver.

♪

[thumping]

♪

- You're doing great.

- [exhales]

It's not much different,
actually.

I mean, it is,
but I never realized

how much I relied on machines.

[thumping]

Doing it old-school like this

makes me think I might be

a better surgeon
than I thought.

- [moaning]

- Oh, no.
- Alicia?

[moans]
What...

What are you...?

[groaning]
- Alicia...

- Alicia, get him back under!

- [screaming]

- Uh, sir?

Sir, we need to be able
to get through here.

[baby crying]

[indistinct chatter]

- She's hungry.
I tried giving the formula,

but she wouldn't take it.

- [groans]

- She needs her mother.

- His heart's racing!
- I'm trying.

- [agonized yelling]

[moaning]

- [grunts]
We need blood, O-neg.

- [grunts]

- There isn't any. We exhausted
the supply earlier tonight.

- Then find some.
We're not losing him.

[tense music]

♪

- Sorry, can I have
everyone's attention?

We have a medical emergency
in one of our operating rooms,

and we need, um, uh,
type O-negative blood.

So, the process is quick
and relatively painless,

and, uh...you can help
save a life.

So if anybody knows that
they are O-negative already,

go ahead and, um, uh,
raise your hand,

and we'll, um...

Uh...

[loud clanging]

Sorry, guys,
but I need your attention

just for a minute.

Would everybody look down?

Just look directly below you.

Um...

If you had X-ray vision,
what you would see

is our second-floor OR.

You would see a man
on the table in the dark.

His name is Hugh.

Hugh is having
open-heart surgery right now,

in a no-electricity setting,
and he is running out of blood.

So however difficult
you're finding today,

I promise you, Hugh's day
is going a lot worse.

So, here, I will go first.

[exhales]

We're in the middle
of a night that

we're gonna remember
for the rest of our lives.

We're gonna tell
the story of how,

in the worst blizzard
New York's seen in a century,

we were trapped in
a hospital.

And it can be a story about
how tired and hungry

and cold and angry we were.

It can be a story about
how we couldn't

stop fighting with each other

or how Dr. Sharpe kept yelling
at you.

Or it can be a story of how,

when every instinct told us
to be at our worst,

we were at our best.

And if we do that,

then maybe Hugh gets
to stick around

and tell that story too.

So...would anyone like
a blood test?

[indistinct murmuring]

- Yeah, I will.

- Yes? Thank you.
- Yeah, me too.

- Yeah? Great. Thanks.

You just see Casey right here,

and, um, and he'll
help you out.

Thank you.
Thank you.

- Nice work,
except for the yelling part.

- [moans]
- You need to sit down.

- Max, as your doctor--
- I'm fine.

- You're not well.
- Thank God for adrenaline.

- Dr. Sharpe, the baby...

[baby crying]

[suspenseful music]

♪

- The introducer's in place.

- Good. Now thread
the catheter into her arteries.

♪

- Done, now what?

- Oh!
[breathing heavy]

- Dr. Kapoor?
- [moaning]

- What's wrong with you?

- Oh, God, my foot is cramping.

I spent too long in the snow.

I need you to apply acupressure

to K-6 point, please.

- On your foot?

- Dr. Hartman,
as you often enjoy pointing out

that I'm not a young man,

I cannot contort myself
to do this.

- So that's why you treat me
like garbage?

Because I made a couple
of jokes about your age?

- More than a couple.
[breathing heavy]

- Okay, I got into neurosurgery
so I didn't have to touch

my patients' bodies,
much less their feet.

- Dr. Kapoor?

- If you don't help me,
I cannot help Agnes.

All you have to do is to apply
pressure between

the second
and third metatarsal,

one third the way between
the MTP joint and calcaneus.

Please.

- Oh, God.
Yeah.

- Open the laces, please.

- Yeah, I have shoes.

- Oh!
- Just calm down.

- [grunts]
[panting]

Without the socks, please.

There.

[yelps]

Gently.

Oh.
Ah.

Put some pressure, no?
- Oh, my God.

- I'm ready with the magnet.

- Agnes,
the baby needs to be fed.

- [crying]

- Station her here.
- But she's unconscious.

- Well, I don't think
we have a choice.

- [crying]

[somber music]

♪

- When was this place built?
- Uh, 1766.

- You know, there used to be

an old swimming pool
in the basement?

- Uh...no, I didn't.
No, I did not.

- Neat.

[clanging]
- Ah!

Damn it!
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait!

Hold on.
Burl?

Burl, are you all right?

- What?

- Uh, you screamed.
- Yeah. I got frustrated.

- Okay.

- Anyway, I think I know
what to do.

I'm gonna need
welding equipment.

- Yeah, we can get that
for you.

- It shouldn't take me
more than ten minutes.

- All right.

- Problem is, it's gonna
suck up a lot of your juice.

You said you had a portion
of the hospital

running on a battery?

- The ICU.

- I'm gonna need that power.

- If you can't fix it...

- Then we'd all be done.

No more juice for anybody.

- It's your call.

♪

.

- How can you put
your faith in this man,

a violent man?

- Well, his violence
was triggered by abuse at work

and years of beatings
as a kid.

- The guard will be with him
at all times.

He gets the power he needs,
we get New Amsterdam

back on its feet.

It's the only way.
- No, it is not the only way.

- The latest emergency
bulletin said

the storm should break
around 5:00 a.m.

With the wind down,

we could get a helicopter
on the roof

and a new generator.

- Yeah, but there's
no guarantee

the storm's gonna break.

- As opposed to
the iron certainty

of us trusting
a homicidal electrician?

- In a half an hour,

the battery will be dead
regardless.

We may not be able to keep

our most critical patients
alive until 5:00 a.m.

- Right, so your prisoner
uses up all

of our existing power
and fails,

and that's a half an hour
less time that we have to try.

Not to mention all the people
that we'd be putting

back into the cold.

Just think about
the greater good, Max.

- Yeah, I am, Helen.
Okay?

I'm not signing off on any plan
that requires me to triage,

to give up on anyone.

- Well, then you are risking
everyone's life.

- I'm trying to save
everyone's life.

- That is not possible.

- Dr. Sharpe, please inform
everyone that in a few moments

the power will go down for
approximately ten minutes.

After which, God willing,
New Amsterdam will be

fully back online.

Okay?

[dramatic music]

♪

[baby cooing]

- What are you...?
[exhales]

- Kira...
- [crying]

What happened?

[moans]
My arm.

- You've had a mild stroke.

- [moaning]

And my baby?
How did she...?

- She's fine.

- Agnes, it's time
to place the magnet

on the right side of
the patient's temple.

- Okay.

- And surely your foot
is better by now.

- Of course, but you seem to be
happy holding it.

Okay, Agnes, now when you feel
the tug on the catheter,

you will know when
it's in the right place.

- [breathing heavy]

- I feel it.
It's working.

- Good. You have Hartman

and his youthful fingers
to thank.

- [scoffs]

[cart clanging]

- Okay, this is all
the welding gear

that we could find.

- Yeah, we got this thing
and whatever this thing is.

- I thought you grew up
on a farm.

- Yeah, I can make that work.

- How can we help?

- Run the cables up
to the battery.

- Okay.
Yeah, I'm on it.

- And then you should all
go out in the hall

before I light this.

So you don't, you know,
blow up.

- [grunts]

- Thank you.
- No, thank you.

- The minute you're done
with this little game,

I'm dragging your ass off
to a cold, dark corner.

You understand me?
- Reyes.

- [grunts softly]

[ominous music]

♪

- All right, everybody,
here we go.

- ♪ Think about it

♪ There must be
a higher love ♪

[stirring rendition
of "Higher Love"]

♪ Down in the heart

♪ Or hidden in
the stars above ♪

♪ Without it

♪ Life is wasted time

♪ Look inside your heart

♪ I'll look inside of mine

♪ Things look so bad
everywhere ♪

♪ In this whole world,
what's fair ♪

♪ We walk blind,
we try to see ♪

♪ Falling behind
in what could be ♪

♪ Bring me a higher love

♪ Bring me a higher love

♪ Bring me a higher love

♪ I could rise above

♪ On a higher love

- Is he done?

- Yeah, I guess.

Hey, Burl, you okay
in there, buddy?

- Burl?

- Burl, hey, buddy.
How you doing?

[menacing music]

♪

- [groans]

- Damn it.
- I told you.

- [laughs darkly]

[groans]

- Max.
Max!

Where you going?

♪

.

- Where's Henry?
- In the ICU.

- Where's his notebook?
He had a notebook.

He was making notes.
We can wake him up,

he can look at them
with fresh eyes,

and then we can come up with
a different plan,

a better plan,
and we can fix it.

Okay?

'Cause there's still time
to fix--

Damn it!
- Max.

Stop.

It's nearly 2:00 a.m.

[exhales deeply]

Hopefully the storm breaks
at five.

And that gives us
at least three hours

to disburse extremely
limited resources,

but you and I need
to decide which patients

are gonna get them
and which ones aren't.

- [scoffs]
That's not who we are.

- No, but it's where we are.

- Helen...
- Max.

We have no power, no blood,
it's freezing...

- That doesn't mean
someone has to die.

- But someone will.

That's just a fact now.

Your job is no longer
to save everyone.

It's to try and minimize
the damage.

Do you understand that?

- I thought it would work.

I just couldn't see a scenario
where it didn't.

- I know.

But now we have to choose...

who to let go.

- I can't...

Choose.

I won't.

- [sniffs]

Then I will.

[power thunders on]

[exciting jazz music]

♪

- The city's still out.

- That means the generator...

- [exhales deeply]

- We got power. Hook him up.

- Assess the ABCs.

- Continue monitoring
manually until...

- Come on, man. You just
have to hang on a bit longer.

- Okay, the catheter's
all the way in.

End of the line.

- Good, Agnes.
You're doing a wonderful job.

All you have to do now
is to attach the syringe and--

♪

- Dr. Kapoor?

- Agnes?

♪

- And what?

- [inhales]

- I've got this.

- [tearfully] Mm-hmm.

[sniffling]

[moaning]

[somber music]

♪

- Where's the blood?

♪

Kira, try to move
your left arm for me.

♪

- [crying]
Thank you.

Thank you.

♪

- Hey.
Hey.

How'd you get us the juice?

- I didn't.

- Okay.

- Hey.

- Did you fix the--

- Welding wasn't gonna
fix that.

I couldn't tell you that
or Reyes would have

dragged me off.

I just figured if this place
had an old swimming pool,

it might have a fuel pump
system I could switch out.

It did.

- What do you want?

Anything.
I'll make it happen.

- I wanna get better.

- ♪ Think about it

♪ There must be higher love

♪ Down in the heart

♪ Or hidden in
the stars above ♪

♪ Without it

♪ Life is wasted time

♪ Look inside your heart

♪ I'll look inside of mine

♪ Things look so bad
everywhere ♪

♪ In this whole world,
what's fair? ♪

♪ We walk blind,
we try to see ♪

♪ Falling behind in
what could be ♪

♪ Bring me a higher love

♪ Bring me a higher love

- Oh, and the baseboards...

Never another speck of dust.

- Did you tell him about
the towels? Three folds?

- How do you know about that?
- You wanted to tell him.

- And I'm gonna fold
all the towels

just the way
you don't like them.

- I was brilliant
last night, wasn't I?

- Oh, yes, exceptional

with all your years
in the field.

- [chuckles]

Thank you.

[mellow music]

♪

[siren wailing]

♪

- You were bloody magnificent
last night.

I just said "bloody."

- I could think of
a better expression

under the circumstances.

- It's a UK thing.

- So I've heard.
- Mm-hmm.

Really.

There's no way I would have
gotten through it without you.

We make a good team.

- That's what I wanted to
speak to you about, actually...

before the power went out.

This thing where I am
your deputy and your doctor...

and your confidante
and your friend...

- That is a lot.
- Yeah, it is.

And it's not working.

All last night, we needed
to choose who to save,

and every time,
you chose all of the above.

- Yeah, I--
- No, that's not a criticism.

I'm glad you did.
You saved everyone.

- We saved everyone.
- Yes.

It worked out,
but sometimes it doesn't.

Sometimes you have to choose...

And you couldn't.

- You just said
it all worked out, and...

I don't see what me not
triaging patients

has to do with...

with us.

- It's what you do with
your cancer as well.

You wanna stay healthy
for your family,

but you want to stay in charge
of the hospital.

You want the chemo,
the strongest that we have,

just not any of
the side effects

that come with it.

From the day this began,

from the day we met,

you have refused to choose.

- I'm not refusing,
it's not that easy.

Look, Helen, all I want is--

- Max.

You want everything.

It's who you are.

You are all of the above.

And then you come to me
with these demands,

these inspiring....

completely impossible demands,

and I don't know who
I'm supposed to be.

- You're supposed to be you.

- I've tried.

I have tried to be
all of the above.

I can't.

I can't be your friend
and your doctor

and your deputy,
so I have to choose.

I have to triage us.

I'm gonna ask Dr. Stauton

to take over for me.
- [scoffs] No.

- She's an exceptional
oncologist.

- No, no!
You don't--

- She'll be your new doctor,
Max.

She'll handle your care,
effective immediately.

- But what if I want you?

[melancholy music]

♪

- Well, I'm afraid
that's no longer an option.

Because we all want you.

♪

[sorrowful music]

♪