All language subtitles for GreysAnatomy15x21KILLERS.English.Corig.Addic7ed.com

Almost all human cells
reproduce on a cycle.

Up to 10% of your heart
is replaced each year.

Red blood cells are replaced
every four months.

Thank you.

Skin cells, every two weeks.

Uh.

Want to get a pizza or something?

I know a great place.

Well, it's late.
I should, uh, go to sleep.

It's only 8:30 in Seattle.

Yeah, but we're not in Seattle.

We're in New York, and we are doing

a complicated surgery on
New York time in the morning.

Okay, fine. Room service...

in bed, then sleep.

We agreed. Just sex, no sleepovers.

But we're out of town.

- Bend the rules.
- No, it's not a rule,

so much as the basic tenet
of this relationship.

- Which is that it's not a relationship?
- Right.

No complications.
My life is already full of them.

But it's not that complicated.
W-We have adjoining rooms.

They're practically the same.

And yet, they are not.

But neurons,

the cells that make up
the brain and spinal cord,

don't regenerate.

I feel used!

Objectified!

Hungry!

Okay. What will it take for you

to let me go to sleep tonight,
guilt-free?

Pizza for breakfast.

Deal.

I'm still questioning pizza
as a breakfast food,

- but this is a really excellent slice.
- Mm-hmm.

How'd you know about this place?

Mm.

It was part of my wish.

You wished for perfect pizza?

From a fairy godmother?

Cancer kids who are in
as bad a shape as I was

get wishes.

Osteosarcoma. Age 10.

Full remission.

What'd you wish for?

- Baseball game at Shea Stadium.
- Yeah.

I got to meet my favorite
player, Dwight Gooden.

I remember thinking, "I'll be back."

And the next time was with
the Mariners as the team doctor.

That is impressive.

Nothing will beat that
first time out here.

I ate here five times.

Even got a picture out front.

Oh, and there was this great donut place

right around the corner. Um...

Gotham Donuts!

Oh! Best glazed donut I've ever had.

That was, uh...

well, that was our last trip
together before the divorce.

Uh, I guess this city
reminds me of better times.

That is the exact opposite of me.

I grew up here.

Well, not exactly here.

I was like half an hour away
in Westchester.

But my life in New York was
definitely not better times.

Wait. You're saying
we could've had donuts?!

- Admit it.
- 14 blocks was not that far.

And when you walk, you see things

- you never would have from a cab.
- You're right.

We totally would've missed
that group of mimes

- yelling at each other.
- And the rat dragging the bagel.

That was so gross.

Amy?

Oh, my God!

- Uh...
- Amy!

Nancy!

Yeah.

Nancy Shepherd.

Oh, Amelia's sister.

You must be Owen.

Yes!

This is my husband.

Nice to meet you, Nancy.

I've heard so much about you.

Do you work here?

I'm covering the chief of OB's
maternity leave.

Ironic, right?

How about you?

Everything okay?

Yeah.

No... We're here for a patient.

All the way from Seattle? Wow.

You must be very in demand.

I guess that's why
we never hear from you.

Yep.

Been pretty busy since I saw you last.

I operated on Catherine Fox herself.

Might've read about it.

Also got married.

Aah.

Right. Welcome to the family.

We've got some pretty
deep-seated dysfunction,

but you've probably
figured that out by now.

Ah, what family doesn't?

Do you have sisters?

I do, so I get it.

We should catch up.

Come for dinner, both of you.

Ah! We can't.

Taking off tonight.

She's got a big surgery
in Seattle tomorrow.

- I do.
- Oh.

Well, at least I got to see you.

Halley's Comet comes around
more than you do.

Oh, uh...

call Mom sometime, kiddo.

It's the kind thing to do.

Okay.

Thanks for that.

Let's go.

I need to find a shower

so I can wash that "kiddo"
off of me before surgery.

Synced & corrected by -robtor-
www.addic7ed.com

You got this!

Oh, man.

Victory Lane! You beat me again.

- No, man, you totally threw that.
- Nice race.

Okay, I'm on way too many pain
meds for you to be losing to me.

- Come on.
- Hey, Dr. Lew.

Jonah, these are your surgeons,
Doctors Shepherd and Lincoln.

- Hey.
- Hi.

- Uh, this is my brother Brady.
- Hi.

You know, I-I would've left him
at home, but he's my ride.

Mm.

Jonah Mays, 18.

He was diagnosed with progressive
kyphoscoliosis at age 6.

He's had multiple posterior spine fusions

with instrumentation from T4 to
L5 to correct the curvature.

Yeah, it's, uh, pretty much
my entire spinal cord.

I've had... 15 surgeries in 12 years.

Some due to growth, some due to
the condition's progression.

Yeah, the metal rods bust
right through his skin.

- Can we take a look?
- Yeah.

You're in good hands, Jonah.

I'll leave you to it.

Looks like the degree of angulation

- has pushed the hardware off the bolts.
- Mm.

But you... you can fix
that, though, right?

Dr. Lincoln and I will remove the rods.

We'll insert a nylon tether,
which will stabilize your spine.

It'll allow room for growth, which means

fewer surgeries in the future.

Good.

'Cause, uh, you know, I've got big plans.

I'm moving to California.

I just got accepted to UC Berkeley.

- Go, Bears!
- Congratulations.

- Thank you.
- One, uh... One step at a time, bro.

You're worried. I get it.

I mean, w-who would take you
to physical therapy

and make sure that you got
to the doctor's on time?

Oh, yeah, that's right. That's
what you've always done for me.

But I won't need it as much, all right?

Okay. We've got your measurements.

We will be back to prep you for surgery

- after we compare them to the scans.
- Okay.

Looks like we can use a vats
to anchor the bolts at T3.

Just like we planned.

Should be done by 5:00.

Ah, that gives us almost another 24 hours

of observation before
we head back to Seattle.

That's amazing news!

I was just gonna leave you
a note, trying to...

What? What? Uh, what's amazing? What?

I just heard you say
it's at least 24 hours

till your flight leaves,
so you can come for dinner.

John and the kids are upstate
visiting his mom,

so it'll be quiet.

I'll make your favorite
chocolate cream pie.

I... I no longer eat,
um, sugar or gluten.

I'm not taking no for an answer.

Fine, make the pie.

Good.

Text me when you're on your way.

See ya!

Can't wait!

So...

you like pie, right?

Five minutes in the lobby is one thing.

Dinner is a terrible idea,
and I'm not going.

You can't make me go alone...

it's like sending Red Riding
Hood to visit the wolf.

I'll be having pizza and donuts
in the city.

- You're more than welcome to j...
- I'm begging.

This is me begging.

Aren't I cute when I beg?

Dr. Kripen, call extension 19.

Okay, Jonah.

Pre-op time.

Are we leaving now?

Why? You winning?

Yeah. But, uh, also...

Brady went to the cafeteria.

He said he was gonna go get an apple,

but, uh, I guarantee you
he comes back with fries.

You know, we have this thing
about saying bye to each other

ever since our parents died
six years ago in a car accident.

And, yeah, it was as dramatic and
tragic as your face is right now.

Oh, sorry. I...

I'm gonna give you something
to relax you,

and Dr. Lincoln is going to
mark you for surgery.

- Cool.
- What are you gonna study at Cal?

Uh, environmental science.

Or literature.

Or something I haven't heard of before.

I-I'm not sure.

Renaissance man. Nice.

Yeah, well, you know, uh,
knowing what you don't know

is the first step to enlightenment.

You will fit right in at Berkeley.

So, did you always know
you wanted to be a doctor?

I have four older siblings
who are all doctors.

I'm not sure it ever occurred
to me to do anything else.

Ah, told ya!

- Fries.
- You want one?

I'm good, thanks.

Uh, but Jonah's good to go.

Got it, okay.

Uh, hold these for me?

Thanks, Doc.

Till next time, brother.

Mm.

Until next time.

Here. And, uh, take that.

You need practice, 'cause
the next time I see you,

I'm-a kick your butt for real.

Okay.

All right.

Signal looks good.

Good. Angle looks good.

So... any food allergies?

Nancy will want to know.

Doesn't matter because I'm not going.

Please?

The begging is cute...
don't get me wrong.

And still, no.

You shouldn't go, either.

Life's too short.

Life is too short

for what it will turn into if I don't go.

One dinner with Nancy,

and I avoid months
of family gossip and drama.

They already think I'm a train wreck.

Well, they're wrong.

Have you met me?

Amelia Shepherd.

Never told my family I got divorced.

Ready to attach the tether?

So they don't get you.

And what... they're mad
because you and Owen eloped?

We didn't elope. We had a wedding.

They were invited. They just didn't come.

Wait. None of your sisters were there?

Or my mom.

Or brother.

- He gets a pass.
- Out of the country?

Dead. But probably judging me
from the grave.

It's complicated.

That's some serious sibling rivalry.

Well, not every family
is Jonah and Brady.

So why go to this dinner?

I was... flown to New York

to perform a rare
and complicated surgery.

I'm here with my "husband,"

who is shockingly handsome
and ever so kind.

This dinner is a chance
for me to... I don't know.

Brag? Prove them wrong?

I...

I'm not sure.

I'm just sure that I have to go,

and that, if you go with me,

I will make it worth your while

in very creative ways
that you will enjoy.

Where did we meet?

At the hospital.

And how long have we been together?

Years, but it feels like minutes
because love is so...

Okay, we don't need poetry.

We just need to keep our story straight.

What color are my eyes?

You think they're gonna quiz me
on the color of your eyes?

Anything is possible.

Sometimes they look green.

Sometimes they look blue,
depending on the...

Good.

What is Owen's favorite pastime?

Blues guitar.

No.

No, watching World War II movies on PBS.

But blues guitar is mine,
and Nancy's never met Owen,

so can't I just answer as myself?

Well, I don't know your life.
I know Owen's.

You could learn it.

Crap. We don't have rings!

Half the surgeons I know
don't wear rings.

- Right. Right.
- Yeah.

We're surgeons.

We're smart. No rings.

All of that is actually true.

At least it's just Nancy.

Better her than Liz or...
God forbid... Kathleen.

Kathleen is the worst.
Kathleen's like Martha Stewart

if Martha Stewart also had
a license to diagnose you

with a personality disorder.

Nancy's bossy, but she's
also the most forgiving.

And she does make a really nice pie.

Plus, she is gonna love you.

And by you, I mean Owen,
who really likes to...

Watch World War II movies.

Thank you.

You're gonna be great!

Also, you can't drink.

- Owen doesn't drink.
- He does.

I just don't want you
to screw anything up.

This is quite a place.

Ah, her husband's an investment banker.

They moved here from a different
giant house in Connecticut

after he got some big promotion.

Wait.

We never had a honeymoon... Owen and I.

He wanted Mexico, I wanted
Paris, so we did neither.

Instead of doing both?

Got it. Got it.

- No compromises, even on the honeymoon.
- Mm.

This is a terrible idea.

Now you figure that out?

You made it.

- We did.
- Come on in.

The house is a mess.

Don't look too close.

You're right on time.

We were just about to start
on the appetizers.

We?

Where do you keep your corkscrew?

We got to get it in before she gets here.

Is that... That sounds like...

Kathleen! You're here!

Kathleen is my...

Other sister.

Yep.

Well, I guess I'll put the wine away.

- You wouldn't have come if you knew.
- No!

Fun! Family reunion!

Is, uh, Liz gonna pop out
of the closet next? Or Mom?

Please give me more credit than that.

I wouldn't just spring Mom on you.

I did call Liz, but she was out of town.

Ah, too bad.

We could've all compared lives to
make sure yours are still better.

It's not like that at all.

No. This is about Nancy's compulsive need

to fix all of us.

We are a family.

We haven't seen each other in years.

You haven't even met Owen.

I'm sure we can all be civil
for one night.

Kathleen. Owen.

You were in the Army, right?

Uh, where were you stationed?

Iraq. Baghdad.

My husband's traveling there.

H-He's a diplomat.

Any recommendations?

Let's move inside before
we start the interrogation.

The Abbasid Palace is quite beautiful.

It was, uh, built in the 12th century

overlooking the Tigris River.

- I'll mention it.
- Mm.

H-How high does the temperature
get there in July?

It gets, uh, pretty hot.

Um, I'm sorry. Could I use your restroom?

Of course. Yeah, I'll show you where.

It's gonna take them about five minutes

to figure out I'm not Owen.

You knew about that palace in Iraq.

Ninth grade World Civ presentation!

That's about all I remember.

I-I might've been able to handle Nancy,

but that Martha Stewart one,
she's got teeth.

Okay. You're right.
We got to get out of here.

I mean, best case scenario,
the whole night's

just them reminding me that I'm
the Shepherd's black sheep.

- I see what you did there.
- That was the nickname

that they gave me in high school.

Black Sheep.

We are not subtle people.

What are we gonna do?

We're gonna go back out there
for a few minutes.

We're gonna say
we got paged to the hospital.

Because we are not in high school.

We are grown-ass surgeons
with medical emergencies.

Not in high school.
Thank you for the reminder.

I'm putting the avocados
on the side for you.

Oh, that's okay. Uh, Owen loves them,

so I sorta got used to them.

He's great, right?

Oh, I'm sure Kathleen's got him cornered.

Uh, maybe I should just go check.

Oh, can you grab that?

You are not at all what I pictured.

Trauma surgeon.

Army.

I thought you'd be a lot more...

Rugged?

Armed?

Uptight.

But Amelia loves to be unpredictable,

so... maybe it makes sense.

It keeps things interesting.

She has a history of false starts

when it comes to weddings.

Well, we're definitely married.

I'm saying congrats on not
being abandoned at the altar.

She would never do that.

Oh, yes, she would.

She is a Houdini-level escape artist.

First sign things might get hard,

and she is out the door.

I'm surprised she didn't bolt
when she saw me here.

She thinks we gang up on her.

She provokes it, though.

Honestly, I always thought

she was more addicted
to drama than the drugs.

But, I mean...

good thing she found someone
with Army training, right?

What's that old slogan?

"No mission too difficult"?

Hey!

So, Jonah's scans came back early.

- We should go.
- Ah.

We could review them in the morning.

Um, I know you were anxious to see them.

I think we should spend
some time with your family.

Oh, um, well, we might need to
look at his labs, though.

Oh, you know, I just looked at them.

And we're good.

O... Kay.

We'll stay.

Do you ever run into Meredith?

I do.

I read she won a Harper Avery.

Uh, they renamed it the
Catherine Fox Award.

But, yeah. uh, she's doing well.

Amelia's doing groundbreaking
research, as well.

Finding non-addictive methods
of pain management.

Well, Amelia would know
how important that is.

How about I get that wine now?

It's fine. Really.

You should be more concerned about

the pills in your bathroom.

I don't want to make you
feel uncomfortable.

Too late.

Um... I should take this.

Oh, it's okay. I'm good.

Go ahead. Amelia said you love them.

I do!

What's happening? Is he okay?

Hey. Did you forget to pack Roodle?

I'm pretty sure I put it in the Bag.

What about the one your mom got him?

Yeah, I can't find it.

That's why we have a backup.

Oh. Try giving him one of his
other stuffed animals.

I'm kind of losing it over here.

Well, he probably shoved it in the couch.

Okay, it's not... it's not here.

It's not... wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!

Here. Found it. Here's Roodle.

There you go. Thank you.

Can I ask you a question?

Sure.

What's the temperature like
in Baghdad in July?

Well, once it got to 130 degrees,

and I cooked eggplant in the sun. Why?

Uhhhh, no reason.

- Okay. Thank you.
- Sure.

Roodle's back.

Roodle is back!

Oh, my God! No.

No way!

I don't believe you.

- Oh!
- What's, uh, going on?

Owen claims he can debone
the fish in one fell swoop.

Well, you know, I work a
lot with bones as a, uh...

Trauma surgeon.

I'm impressed he knows
it's called a paring knife.

I-I'm not convinced anyone can do it.

Can and...

- did.
- Aah!

Oh, my God!

Can you do that on people?

Uh, never tried, so I'll just say yes.

Oh! We love him.

And I love her.

Okay. There's just one thing
I don't understand.

Out of all of us, how did you
end up with the hottest husband?

Aah!

- Ooh!
- What? Ah!

Amelia was raving about
your pie on the way over.

You just made Nancy's day.

I-I'll take half that piece.

Oh, you can put the other one
right on my plate.

I hear my girls!

I didn't call her. I swear!

I may have accidentally mentioned it.

This place is so obnoxiously huge,

I can never find my way...

There's my baby girl!

- Oh!
- Hi, Mom!

Oho, oh!

Let me look at you.

- Gorgeous!
- Mm!

Oh, I've always liked you
with shorter hair.

Are you going gray under there?

Because your grandmother
was completely white

by the time she was 35.

Mom, please.

And who is this handsome fellow?

This is my husband, Owen.

No, it's not.

Of course it is. And he's fantastic.

You know, we were surprised,
too, but she picked a good one.

Well, I'm sure he's great.

But when I visited Derek,

I met Owen Hunt.

And this is not him.

Okay.

I'm getting the wine.

Uh-huh.

Who is he? Who are you?

He's my friend and colleague,
Atticus Lincoln.

You can call me Link.

What the hell were you thinking?

She wasn't.

That's the narcissism.

Were you even married?

Yes! Yes!

Owen and I were married,
and now... we're not.

You're separated?

Divorced.

You were married less than a year.

Actually, a little more.

But less than two.

I guess. What... What does it matter?

Nancy and Liz owe me 50 bucks.

You bet I'd get divorced?

For what it's worth,

I thought it would last
longer than it did.

Okay, you bet on my marriage

after you didn't come to my wedding?

You didn't come to my wedding.
You were in jail.

She came to mine.

Uncle Ron walked in on her

screwing that usher in the coat room.

I would've come with proper notice,

but I'd barely heard of Owen
before the invitations arrived.

I didn't know if there
was going to be a wedding.

Okay, do you have any idea how
hurtful and insulting that...

this is why I didn't even
bother to call you

when I found out I had a brain tumor.

This is why.

Amelia Frances Shepherd,

you have a brain tumor and you
didn't tell your mother?!

You have a brain tumor?

Are we supposed to feel better
that your fake husband

- doesn't know, either?
- Had.

I h... I had a benign Grade I Meningioma

that they removed.

Completely?

'Cause this seems pretty brain damaged.

I'd say more like delusional.

But, you know, par for the course.

Remember when she
bought herself that ring

and she told us all she was engaged

to that guy she dated in high school?

He couldn't afford to
buy the ring himself.

She got my car stuck in the ditch,

walked home,
said somebody must've stolen it,

but left the keys inside.

That was years ago, and I made amends!

Or when she was so drunk
at Uncle Adam's funeral

that she dropped her end of the casket.

I wasn't drunk. I was high.

And, yeah, I had some bad years.

You don't have to bring up
every transgression.

Yeah, we don't have that kind of time.

The point is all that crazy
happened before the brain tumor.

You've always been impulsive.

You don't think things through

or the impact they're gonna
have on other people.

You just do whatever the hell you want.

Yeah, and then you concoct
these preposterous stories

to cover the truth that
inevitably surfaces.

Okay, girls, that's enough.

Bringing fake Owen to dinner tonight

might just be the most demented
thing you've ever done.

And if you're really clean now,

then we can't blame the drugs
or the tumor,

which brings us
back to personality disorder.

Okay, you don't know me.

You have not seen me for years.

I am trapped in your minds
and on your stairs

at about 14 years old, and I am
not that person anymore.

I am sober.

I am responsible.

And I am a neurosurgeon
at the top of my field.

I save lives every day.

In fact, I am the chief of neuro

at one of the top hospitals
in the country.

Because Derek was moving
and gave you the job.

Listen, um I'm new to, uh, all of this.

And I haven't known Amelia that long,

but I wanted us to stay
for dinner tonight

so you could meet the woman that
I've been getting to know,

because she is not at all
the person you are describing.

Link, you don't have to...

She is a brilliant surgeon,

the kind you fly across the
country when you need the best.

She just performed a surgery

that very few human beings
on the planet can do.

She is a respected teacher and mentor.

She cares about her patients
and her colleagues.

And she's beautiful and funny
and kind and strong.

They're sleeping together, right?

- Obviously.
- She's overcome a lot of adversity.

And, sure, she feels
her feelings in a big way,

but that makes her better
than most people I know,

not worse,
because it makes her authentic.

She was an amazing mom to Betty,
and still kinda is to Leo.

I mean, even if she doesn't
have legal custody,

that baby is so lucky
to have her in his...

Wait... did you just say "mom"?

Did you say "baby"?

Well... crap.

You have a baby?

Baby or tumor... which is crazier?

Who's Betty? I'm going with baby.

You never tell me anything.

Come on.

Houdini.

You okay?

I said we shouldn't go.

I said we shouldn't stay!

Wow, okay.

So your sisters are terrorists,

but now I'm your problem?

Look, everything was going fine

until your mom called us on our bluff.

And I know it got a little rough...

A little rough?

It was a lifetime

of humiliating mistakes
and dirty laundry on display.

I don't care about your laundry.

No, I care. You were pain management.

You were my human blue light,

mood-enhancing when placed over my body.

And now you know too much.

And I'm... I can't.

Son of a...

Jonah's in respiratory distress.

We need to get to
Fox Medical Center in Manhattan,

please, as fast as you can.

- He's bending by the minute.
- He's exaggerating.

I'm fine. I'll... I'll be okay.

Ow!
- Jonah, we took a look at your scans,

- and the tether just doesn't...
- Oh, please don't say it.

Your lungs are compressed.

We're gonna have to replace
the rod so you can breathe.

But, uh, I-I have to... I have plans.

W-W-What if we tighten the tether?

That's not how it works. I'm sorry.

The rods don't work.

Okay, I-I'll need new ones again
by the end of the year.

- The tether didn't even last for a day.
- W-What if...

Jonah, they said there's
no other way, okay?

T-There's always another way.

That's what you said
when Mom and Dad died.

I-I was scared because

of how many people want to adopt
somebody with my condition...

and you said that you'd
find a way, and you did.

You quit law school
so you could take care of me.

You can still have big plans. Okay?

- Take classes here at community co...
- That's not what I want!

There has to be something else.

A vertebral column resection.

- What's that?
- Dr. Shepherd!

We would remove the vertebrae
causing the curvature

and replace it with a titanium cage

that would protect your spinal cord.

It's a very risky, very complex surgery

with many potential complications.

It could result in paralysis, even death.

Mm. But if it works?

It would permanently correct
the deformity.

You can... You can do it now?

- I don't recommend it.
- Yes.

It is risky.

But if you decide that it's
what you want, we could do it.

- I want it.
- No, no, no, no way.

Look, man.
You've... Y-You had everything.

Yale Law School, tons of friends,

an awesome girlfriend.

Y-Y-You were even c-captain

of that weird ultimate Frisbee team.

Hey, man, we were...
we were league champions.

You gave up everything.

Now you have h-hospital food
and waiting rooms.

I like the fries here.

You're the world's best brother.

Okay? Y-You're my personal hero.

But I'm 18.

I want this surgery, and I'm
gonna do it no matter what.

But I'd rather have you on... on my side.

I can't lose you, too.

You're not gonna lose me.

This isn't the part where I die.

This is the part where
I'm brave and it pays off.

Look at her.

Look at her eyes.

She says she can do it.

Until next time, brother.

Until next time.

He asked about his options.

We could paralyze him.

A woman just became quadriplegic

on our table.

That was out of our control.

Exactly. There are no guarantees.

Our patient has to come first.

I am putting him first.
This is what he wants.

This is what you want

because you've still
got something to prove.

Do I need to find someone else
to do this with me?

Because I will.

Amelia, I'm saying
it's been... a rough night.

I'm saying y-your sisters just
treated you like a teenager.

They questioned your surgical skills.

I can't care what they think.

You think you don't care?!

I just spent the night
pretending I was Owen!

This is not about them!
I cannot let them define me!

If I did, I would still be the
messed-up baby of the family,

the person that I revert to
when I am with them.

And that is not who I am!

I know that!

I'm asking if you know that.

I'm asking if you're okay.

I'm asking if you are sure

you're not doing this surgery
to prove something

to people who clearly have
no understanding of you at all.

Jonah deserves a life

that is more than a cycle
of surgery after surgery.

It's what he wants.

And I know I can do it.

Okay.

Vertebral column's out.

Get me the titanium cage.

Careful of distraction on the cord.

We just lost the signal.

The cage spread too far.

There's too much traction
on the spinal cord.

- He's paralyzed.
- So we revert to where we were

before we lost signal.

- Dr. Shepherd...
- Shh!

Please.

Signal's back.

I got it.

He is not paralyzed.

No neurological deficits.
How do you feel?

Like I'm going to Cali.

How long should he, uh,
stay off his feet?

A day or two. It's good for him to walk.

Ease into it, though.

Your doctors here will
oversee your follow-up,

but you know how to reach us.

Wait. So that's it?

You guys change my whole damn
life and then you just leave?

Well, come see us.

Seattle is a short plane ride
away from Berkeley.

True.

Thank you.

Thank you guys for...

giving me a future.

You were brave.

And it paid off.

Thank you, uh, for...

Thank you.

You were brave, and it paid off.

Do you want to go for, uh...
get something to eat?

No, um...

No, I need to walk.

I'll see you on the plane.

Brady.

You okay?

Yeah.

I just don't know what to do.

Jonah's gonna be fine.

I know. And I'm glad.

I just...

I don't know what I'm gonna
do... without him, you know?

Would it be weird, you know...

w-w-would it... would it be weird

if I just followed him to California

and just... I don't know...
was... was nearby?

Was...

- I mean, he's...
- He's your brother.

I get it.

I miss my brother every day.

But maybe try not to
follow him to college.

Yeah.

Maybe try to give him some breathing room

to become whoever he is
outside your shadow.

And then visit.

Yeah.

Thank you.

_

Hey, kiddo.

Can we... go somewhere and, uh, talk?

What... What happened with Owen?

It just... didn't work out.

Do you think I sabotage relationships?

That I don't know how to love?

Well.

That answers that.

I got you!

I remember when you were
learning to ride a bike.

Derek and your sisters

were zipping all over the neighborhood,

and you were desperate to join them.

And so you... you, uh, pulled

that old purple bike out of the shed.

You know, the one with the...

the streamers hanging off the handlebars.

Mm. Those things were all ripped out

by the time that bike was mine.

And you refused to use training wheels

because you said that was for babies.

And you wouldn't let me help, either.

I had to... I had to spy on you
from the kitchen window.

You don't know how hard that was.

Watching you fall over and over again.

My other kids didn't like
to fail, but... but you...

Okay. Yeah, Mom, I get it.

One time you took this... this big spill,

and you... and you
ripped open your pants.

And by the time I ran out,

you had pulled that...
that old ratty bike up,

and... and you were
halfway down the block.

Every time you fell down,

you got up and came back stronger.

But not that you... that you
didn't care about falling,

but... just you weren't afraid of it.

And that's what made you...

what makes you...

out of all the kids...

the most like your father.

After he died, it was hard

to... be around any...

anything... that reminded me of him.

And...

...Derek said he'd watch out for you.

And he did his best,

but... he wasn't your mother.

You deserved a mother.

But h-he offered, and I let him.

And it is my biggest regret.

It turns out that,
under the right conditions,

neurons can recover.

I took in a drug addict.

Betty, Leo's birth mom.

15, so of course,
she already knew everything.

Parenting her was...

...the hardest thing I've ever done.

And I'm pretty sure she was
a tenth the trouble that I was.

I put you through a lot.

I know it wasn't easy.

I'm sorry I missed your wedding.

I'm sorry I missed your brain tumor.

I'm sorry things don't
go better with your sisters.

It's fine.

Not everyone's close to their siblings.

If they can break from normal operations

and focus on healing,

they have a chance at regrowth.

If you don't think
you're worthy of love...

...if you don't think your love
is valuable, you're wrong.

And that's on me.

Mom, I don't blame you for...

Oh, oh, I...

I know, hon.

But when you most needed help
trying to...

...make sense of life or...

...loss...

...or love...

...I wasn't there.

So put that on me...

...and move forward.

What if I can't?

It's human nature to want
to fix what's broken.

Well... then that's on you.

...the bat. Fires.

Slaps it to right.

That one's gonna split the gap

and head all the way to the wall!

One run is in.

Here comes Beasley around third,

but cut off by Montanari,

and he's, of course, standing up...

You are kind.

And you were brave last night, too.

With my family.
And... And in that surgery.

You didn't have to do that with me.

Either thing.

You are...

Surprising to me.

And you deserve a lot better

than the things that I said to you.

You are more than a human blue light.

Though you are very,
very good at bluelighting.

I'm sorry.

And I'd like to make it up to you,

if you'll let me.

Mmm.

Mmm.

- Mmm!

Mm-hmm.

We may not be able to
replicate exactly what we lost.

- Oh, yeah.
- Yeah?

You got a little something,
too, right there.

But in its place will grow something new.

- Hey!
- Welcome home!

- How'd it go?
- Uh, it's a long story.

- Mm?
- So come tell us.

Well, the case went fine,

but then we ran into Nancy.

- Your sister?
- Yep.

- Is she the snarky one?
- They're all the snarky one.

She invited us to dinner.

- And you went?
- To her house?

And I got ambushed.

- It's a long process, but it happens...
- She was there.

Slowly, but surely...

...until we have what we need.