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- Previously on Crazy Ex-Girlfriend...
- I still love you, Nathaniel.
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We just don't have the same
3
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- priorities right now.
- Every time we're happy,
4
00:00:06,850 --> 00:00:08,195
you try to ruin it.
5
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You don't have to be a lawyer.
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There are other fields.
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That's what happy looks like.
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I'm thinking of calling it "Rebetzels."
9
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I'm sure you told your father
10
00:00:17,194 --> 00:00:18,927
at Tucker's seventh birthday party.
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I need to borrow some cash.
12
00:00:20,164 --> 00:00:21,596
For his son's braces?
13
00:00:21,665 --> 00:00:23,131
Here is a check for Tucker.
14
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Do you think I'm a bad mom?
15
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You're not the most attentive parent.
16
00:00:26,170 --> 00:00:27,671
Can I get a tattoo?
Just a small blueprint
17
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- of the local prison.
- Yeah, okay.
18
00:00:29,340 --> 00:00:30,806
That's bad advice, Mom.
19
00:00:30,874 --> 00:00:31,940
Brendan's my weed guy.
20
00:00:32,009 --> 00:00:33,445
I'm thinking of that great song
21
00:00:33,470 --> 00:00:35,143
from the movie Slumbered.
22
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♪ In one indescribable instant ♪
23
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♪ The whole world falls away. ♪
24
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Love is finding your own path.
25
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Oh, God. I love her.
26
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When you find the one you love,
27
00:00:47,191 --> 00:00:48,256
you should hold on tight.
28
00:00:48,281 --> 00:00:49,847
I got to get her back.
29
00:00:50,718 --> 00:00:54,162
♪ Meet Rebecca ♪
30
00:00:54,231 --> 00:00:56,665
♪ She's coolest girl in the world ♪
31
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♪ Wait, wrong Rebecca ♪
32
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♪ It's this one over here ♪
33
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♪ She's spunky, she's sweet ♪
34
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♪ A generous friend ♪
35
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♪ Oh, but there she
looks kind of mean ♪
36
00:01:08,245 --> 00:01:09,245
♪ Hmm, okay ♪
37
00:01:09,279 --> 00:01:10,712
♪ She's snarky, sarcastic ♪
38
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♪ And a... What? ♪
39
00:01:12,049 --> 00:01:13,548
♪ You know, we're
not really seeing ♪
40
00:01:13,617 --> 00:01:15,884
♪ A common theme ♪
41
00:01:15,953 --> 00:01:17,312
♪ Meet Rebecca ♪
42
00:01:18,689 --> 00:01:21,556
♪ She's too hard to summarize ♪
43
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♪ So, let's go back
to other Rebecca. ♪
44
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I think I'm a fork. Uh-oh!
45
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-- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe --
-- www.addic7ed.com --
46
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I hate you!
47
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You're the worst mom ever!
48
00:01:47,205 --> 00:01:48,137
Hey, Tucker.
49
00:01:48,162 --> 00:01:49,695
It's your big sister Rebecca.
50
00:01:50,085 --> 00:01:51,052
For your birthday, I got you
51
00:01:51,121 --> 00:01:54,689
a cool pair of limited
edition Fett Regoso sneakers.
52
00:01:54,758 --> 00:01:56,158
Hope you like them.
53
00:01:56,226 --> 00:01:58,960
If you don't, feel free
to sell them for drugs.
54
00:01:59,072 --> 00:02:01,765
Ha, ha. Kidding. Don't do drugs.
55
00:02:02,570 --> 00:02:04,873
I know this gift is out of
the blue since we haven't
56
00:02:04,898 --> 00:02:08,170
seen each other since Grandpa
Bobo's funeral years ago.
57
00:02:08,238 --> 00:02:10,439
I'm sorry so much time has gone by.
58
00:02:11,304 --> 00:02:13,750
I'm in a better place now
and taking stock of my life.
59
00:02:15,617 --> 00:02:18,476
I've been through a lot,
but I've turned a corner.
60
00:02:18,867 --> 00:02:21,385
And I hope someday we can
get to know each other.
61
00:02:21,410 --> 00:02:22,576
Whenever you're ready,
62
00:02:22,601 --> 00:02:25,148
I'm out here in L.A. No pressure.
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00:02:25,556 --> 00:02:28,476
Love, your sis, Rebecca Bunch.
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00:02:29,906 --> 00:02:33,357
P.S. Hope these sneakers
make you truly happy.
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00:02:33,382 --> 00:02:36,008
Happy, happy, happy...
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00:02:41,034 --> 00:02:42,467
I sent him a card and gift.
67
00:02:42,492 --> 00:02:44,036
Anyway, I'll probably
never hear back from him,
68
00:02:44,060 --> 00:02:46,094
but I owed Tucker that letter.
69
00:02:46,162 --> 00:02:48,174
You know, I really want to
make things right with him.
70
00:02:48,198 --> 00:02:49,701
If not now, then someday.
71
00:02:49,726 --> 00:02:52,133
And he's kind of the
last person in my life
72
00:02:52,158 --> 00:02:53,818
that I have unfinished
business with, you know?
73
00:02:53,843 --> 00:02:56,137
Really? What about your mother?
74
00:02:56,206 --> 00:02:57,438
Your father.
75
00:02:57,507 --> 00:02:58,773
Audra Levine... Ooh!
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00:02:58,842 --> 00:03:00,419
The professor whose house
you almost burned down.
77
00:03:00,443 --> 00:03:02,455
And I really think that we
should circle back to Greg
78
00:03:02,494 --> 00:03:04,026
- at some point...
- Uh, yeah.
79
00:03:04,080 --> 00:03:07,048
Hey, boys, your pretzels
are fresh out of the oven.
80
00:03:07,073 --> 00:03:08,316
We'll talk about that later, okay?
81
00:03:08,384 --> 00:03:10,952
Hey! Isn't this cool, guys?
82
00:03:11,020 --> 00:03:13,087
Our friend owns a pretzel stand.
83
00:03:13,156 --> 00:03:14,455
- Uh-huh.
- It's fun, right?
84
00:03:14,524 --> 00:03:15,957
Yeah!
85
00:03:16,025 --> 00:03:17,859
What do you think, guys? Best ever?
86
00:03:17,927 --> 00:03:19,227
- It's fine.
- It's kind of dry.
87
00:03:19,295 --> 00:03:21,229
- Hey.
- Tommy.
88
00:03:21,297 --> 00:03:23,131
Uh, I love your Fett Regoso hat.
89
00:03:23,199 --> 00:03:25,633
I'm a massive Fett Regoso fan.
90
00:03:25,702 --> 00:03:27,635
Like, I've been a fan
of his from the '90s.
91
00:03:27,704 --> 00:03:30,119
And I'm so glad he's
having a revival now, right?
92
00:03:31,341 --> 00:03:33,172
I am so sorry, they are such lumps.
93
00:03:33,205 --> 00:03:35,664
Mom. Come on. Just give me the car keys.
94
00:03:35,689 --> 00:03:39,213
Fine. But drive safe.
95
00:03:39,282 --> 00:03:43,317
Make sure you stop the car
when you drop Tommy off.
96
00:03:43,430 --> 00:03:45,497
A slow roll through the
carpool lane doesn't cut it.
97
00:03:45,522 --> 00:03:46,854
Okay.
98
00:03:46,923 --> 00:03:49,590
Yeah, drive safe. Or recklessly.
99
00:03:49,659 --> 00:03:51,392
Whichever makes me cooler.
100
00:03:53,100 --> 00:03:55,105
No, don't turn around.
This is too fun.
101
00:03:55,130 --> 00:03:57,598
I'm sorry. They should be nicer to you.
102
00:03:57,667 --> 00:03:59,667
It's... I don't know,
teenagers are tough.
103
00:03:59,736 --> 00:04:02,703
Yeah, no, listen, it's a
phase; you'll get through it.
104
00:04:02,772 --> 00:04:04,906
You're a great mom and
they're ultimately good kids.
105
00:04:04,974 --> 00:04:06,340
Hmm, basically.
106
00:04:06,409 --> 00:04:07,929
- I mean, Tommy's not the brightest...
- No.
107
00:04:07,977 --> 00:04:11,379
... and Brendan's an isolated
loner, but I love them?
108
00:04:11,447 --> 00:04:13,681
- All right, bye.
- Bye.
109
00:04:13,750 --> 00:04:15,716
- Mwah, mwah.
- See you later.
110
00:04:15,785 --> 00:04:17,151
You know, it's interesting.
111
00:04:17,220 --> 00:04:19,187
When I was a teenager, my mother and I,
112
00:04:19,255 --> 00:04:20,521
we didn't connect at all.
113
00:04:20,590 --> 00:04:21,667
She really only wanted to talk about
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00:04:21,691 --> 00:04:24,903
her concerns, and I was too young
115
00:04:24,928 --> 00:04:26,761
to weigh in on vaginal rejuvenation.
116
00:04:27,502 --> 00:04:29,730
Yeah, uh, I hear you.
117
00:04:29,799 --> 00:04:32,166
Truth is, I don't talk about this a lot,
118
00:04:32,235 --> 00:04:33,743
but my mother and I have
been estranged for...
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00:04:33,768 --> 00:04:36,103
You know, sometimes I just
wish I could go back in time.
120
00:04:36,172 --> 00:04:38,105
- And back to you, okay.
- And I would tell
121
00:04:38,174 --> 00:04:41,494
little Rebecca that
it's all gonna be okay.
122
00:04:41,711 --> 00:04:43,778
That, yes, people don't
understand who she really is
123
00:04:43,847 --> 00:04:47,141
inside, but she's wonderful and special
124
00:04:47,166 --> 00:04:48,939
- and she's worth...
- Hello?
125
00:04:48,964 --> 00:04:50,597
Excuse me.
126
00:04:52,431 --> 00:04:53,688
Tucker?
127
00:04:53,756 --> 00:04:54,956
What are... Oh, my God.
128
00:04:55,024 --> 00:04:57,602
Oh, my God, you're here! Hi!
129
00:04:57,627 --> 00:05:00,328
I got your card and your
gift; I came to visit.
130
00:05:00,396 --> 00:05:02,656
This is unbelievable. Um, AJ, AJ!
131
00:05:02,696 --> 00:05:04,513
This is my little half brother...
132
00:05:04,567 --> 00:05:06,868
No, no. My whole brother.
This is my brother.
133
00:05:06,936 --> 00:05:09,770
So, this is the spawn
of your father's whore?
134
00:05:09,883 --> 00:05:11,316
- AJ.
- That's okay.
135
00:05:11,341 --> 00:05:12,805
I've heard that before.
136
00:05:12,830 --> 00:05:15,710
You said that to my face
on my seventh birthday.
137
00:05:16,150 --> 00:05:18,312
Yeah. Right. I'm the worst.
138
00:05:18,381 --> 00:05:20,414
So, um, hey.
139
00:05:20,483 --> 00:05:22,041
Is your mom here?
140
00:05:22,066 --> 00:05:25,253
Oh, she said she told you
I was coming on my own.
141
00:05:25,509 --> 00:05:27,421
She said she called you.
142
00:05:27,490 --> 00:05:28,789
You didn't get her voice mails?
143
00:05:28,858 --> 00:05:31,125
Oh, God, I don't listen
to voice mail, I'm sorry.
144
00:05:31,194 --> 00:05:33,027
M-My outgoing message
is. "Seriously, don't,"
145
00:05:33,096 --> 00:05:34,161
and then just beep.
146
00:05:34,230 --> 00:05:36,564
Oh, no, I'm-I'm
springing myself on you.
147
00:05:36,589 --> 00:05:39,056
That is so rude. I-I'll go home.
148
00:05:39,081 --> 00:05:40,948
Tucker, stop. You're not going anywhere.
149
00:05:41,104 --> 00:05:42,344
This is great; this is amazing.
150
00:05:42,405 --> 00:05:43,749
I don't even know where to begin, uh...
151
00:05:43,773 --> 00:05:44,783
What's your favorite pretzel?
152
00:05:44,807 --> 00:05:46,118
You can have any pretzel you like.
153
00:05:46,165 --> 00:05:47,580
I own the place. I'm Rebetzel.
154
00:05:47,605 --> 00:05:49,877
Wait. This is your pretzel stand?
155
00:05:50,103 --> 00:05:51,612
I love pretzels!
156
00:05:51,681 --> 00:05:53,481
They're like a funky treat for teens.
157
00:05:53,549 --> 00:05:55,483
Oh, my God, that's what
I always used to say.
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00:05:55,551 --> 00:05:57,285
Really? Gasp.
159
00:05:57,353 --> 00:05:59,658
Wait. You say "gasp"? I say "gasp."
160
00:06:00,025 --> 00:06:01,188
Gasp.
161
00:06:01,455 --> 00:06:03,331
Whoa. Okay.
162
00:06:03,393 --> 00:06:04,570
We got a lot of catching up to do.
163
00:06:04,594 --> 00:06:05,838
Let's just, let's get out of here.
164
00:06:05,862 --> 00:06:07,156
AJ, you're in charge.
Think you can handle it?
165
00:06:07,181 --> 00:06:09,330
Um, yeah. It's a pretzel stand.
166
00:06:09,443 --> 00:06:12,043
I just flipped the cinnamons.
I'm good until 3:00.
167
00:06:12,068 --> 00:06:13,068
Great.
168
00:06:13,136 --> 00:06:14,635
Great, thanks.
169
00:06:15,228 --> 00:06:18,272
So, you gave up being
a lawyer completely.
170
00:06:18,642 --> 00:06:20,308
Yeah, I mean, I give free legal advice
171
00:06:20,376 --> 00:06:23,025
at the county jail, but
the job part I don't miss.
172
00:06:23,050 --> 00:06:25,057
- So what do you want to do today... ?
- Hello, Rebecca.
173
00:06:25,081 --> 00:06:26,647
Hey, hi, Nathaniel.
174
00:06:26,716 --> 00:06:27,993
- I thought we were not...
- Please.
175
00:06:28,017 --> 00:06:30,184
Please, I need to say
something very important to you.
176
00:06:30,253 --> 00:06:31,652
But first, little boy, move aside.
177
00:06:31,721 --> 00:06:34,422
We have no money for your
youth club overpriced candy.
178
00:06:34,490 --> 00:06:36,357
No, this is my brother, Tucker.
179
00:06:36,426 --> 00:06:38,059
- And he's in town for...
- I said...
180
00:06:38,127 --> 00:06:39,927
- Please.
- For... What?
181
00:06:39,952 --> 00:06:42,853
Look, I, Rebecca, I
need to say this, okay?
182
00:06:43,736 --> 00:06:45,132
You and I belong together.
183
00:06:45,201 --> 00:06:46,400
And that's just a fact.
184
00:06:46,469 --> 00:06:48,602
I love you; you love me.
185
00:06:48,671 --> 00:06:50,304
The sooner you get used to it,
186
00:06:50,373 --> 00:06:52,413
I think the easier and
better it'll be for everyone.
187
00:06:52,658 --> 00:06:54,342
Look, yes, I still have feelings for you
188
00:06:54,410 --> 00:06:56,832
and you still have feelings for me.
189
00:06:56,857 --> 00:06:59,724
But I just can't, okay? I'm with child.
190
00:06:59,749 --> 00:07:01,482
You're... ? No, I'm with a child.
191
00:07:01,507 --> 00:07:04,395
I'm with a child, my brother,
and he's my focus right now.
192
00:07:04,420 --> 00:07:06,887
But did you hear what I said?
193
00:07:06,956 --> 00:07:08,823
- I love you.
- I...
194
00:07:09,002 --> 00:07:12,159
What else do I have to
say to get you to take me back?
195
00:07:12,184 --> 00:07:13,984
I don't know.
196
00:07:14,431 --> 00:07:17,064
I just don't, I don't
know if you understand me.
197
00:07:17,177 --> 00:07:19,978
Just-just go, go. Go, Nathaniel.
198
00:07:20,003 --> 00:07:21,168
- Okay? Just...
- Rebecca.
199
00:07:21,237 --> 00:07:22,903
- Ciao, Nathaniel.
- What are you...
200
00:07:22,972 --> 00:07:24,138
Ciao, bambino.
201
00:07:31,514 --> 00:07:33,681
Whoa, that guy is so in love with you.
202
00:07:34,817 --> 00:07:36,484
He's very handsome, and was wearing
203
00:07:36,552 --> 00:07:38,019
a very expensive cologne,
204
00:07:38,087 --> 00:07:39,553
"Take Her," by Fett Regoso.
205
00:07:39,655 --> 00:07:41,389
Which was discontinued in the '90s
206
00:07:41,457 --> 00:07:43,124
because of its problematic ad campaign
207
00:07:43,192 --> 00:07:44,392
and is now a collector's item.
208
00:07:44,504 --> 00:07:45,570
How do you know that?
209
00:07:45,838 --> 00:07:47,995
I have a cologne collection.
210
00:07:48,509 --> 00:07:50,542
I love you.
211
00:07:56,549 --> 00:07:58,650
Tucker's gonna sleep on the couch.
212
00:08:00,783 --> 00:08:03,177
So, your mom is just cool
with you flying out here
213
00:08:03,246 --> 00:08:05,961
by yourself to visit a
woman that you barely know?
214
00:08:05,986 --> 00:08:06,914
Yep.
215
00:08:06,983 --> 00:08:08,949
Okay. And what about your dad?
216
00:08:09,018 --> 00:08:11,252
'Cause he and Rebecca
aren't on the best terms.
217
00:08:11,320 --> 00:08:13,274
Oh, my parents are divorced.
218
00:08:13,299 --> 00:08:15,734
I only see him for a
few weeks in the summer.
219
00:08:15,759 --> 00:08:17,958
- He is...
- Garbage?
220
00:08:18,061 --> 00:08:19,627
I try not to use bad language,
221
00:08:19,652 --> 00:08:21,185
but you're right.
222
00:08:21,562 --> 00:08:23,729
He is not great.
223
00:08:24,867 --> 00:08:27,068
He never lets me do
anything I want to do.
224
00:08:27,261 --> 00:08:30,596
My summers with him are awful;
he makes me work construction.
225
00:08:31,522 --> 00:08:32,787
You see this callus?
226
00:08:32,875 --> 00:08:33,974
You poor thing.
227
00:08:34,043 --> 00:08:35,776
I also have a Silas callus.
228
00:08:35,845 --> 00:08:38,646
This is from 2005, building
townhouses in Tucson.
229
00:08:38,714 --> 00:08:39,814
Oh, my gosh.
230
00:08:40,127 --> 00:08:41,849
Okay, sorry to break this up.
231
00:08:41,918 --> 00:08:44,029
But have you checked in with
your mom since you got here?
232
00:08:44,053 --> 00:08:46,108
Like, does she know you arrived safely?
233
00:08:46,133 --> 00:08:47,398
Oh, yeah, I texted her.
234
00:08:47,423 --> 00:08:48,789
No, you know what? Heather's right.
235
00:08:48,858 --> 00:08:50,035
I really should check in with your mom.
236
00:08:50,059 --> 00:08:52,059
Sure, you can text her.
237
00:08:52,128 --> 00:08:54,070
Text is best; she's so busy.
238
00:08:54,095 --> 00:08:56,063
Oh. Excuse me, where's your bathroom?
239
00:08:56,132 --> 00:08:58,632
Uh, it's right, uh, there.
240
00:09:01,650 --> 00:09:03,204
Okay.
241
00:09:03,272 --> 00:09:05,973
Hey, Marissa, comma,
Rebecca Bunch here, comma.
242
00:09:06,042 --> 00:09:08,377
Just letting you know
Tucker got in safely
243
00:09:08,402 --> 00:09:10,700
and I'll take good care of him.
244
00:09:10,828 --> 00:09:13,467
Also, thank you for ruining
my family and my childhood...
245
00:09:13,492 --> 00:09:15,993
Okay, just delete,
delete, delete, delete.
246
00:09:16,018 --> 00:09:17,806
Yeah. You're right; I'm the adult now.
247
00:09:17,831 --> 00:09:20,798
Okay, delete, delete, delete, send.
248
00:09:20,823 --> 00:09:23,657
Okay, waiting dots.
Waiting dots already.
249
00:09:24,314 --> 00:09:26,427
"Hope you guys have a great time."
250
00:09:26,496 --> 00:09:27,496
Look at that.
251
00:09:27,530 --> 00:09:29,330
Oh. Okay. Okay.
252
00:09:29,398 --> 00:09:30,709
Well, that's settled, then.
253
00:09:30,733 --> 00:09:32,833
Oh, he's such a great kid.
254
00:09:33,556 --> 00:09:35,870
And he really reminds me of
myself at that age, you know?
255
00:09:36,133 --> 00:09:37,232
Hmm.
256
00:09:46,346 --> 00:09:48,346
_
257
00:09:58,947 --> 00:10:02,657
So, I need a paralegal to
come on to the Yamamoto case.
258
00:10:02,682 --> 00:10:04,382
It's huge.
259
00:10:04,458 --> 00:10:06,758
Lots of hours, tons of overtime.
260
00:10:06,783 --> 00:10:08,750
Please! Sir, pick me.
261
00:10:08,811 --> 00:10:10,278
I need all the overtime I can get
262
00:10:10,346 --> 00:10:12,196
to help with my student loans.
263
00:10:12,221 --> 00:10:14,525
I'm also paying off my student loans.
264
00:10:14,550 --> 00:10:15,728
Still?
265
00:10:15,753 --> 00:10:17,086
Are you saying I'm old?
266
00:10:17,135 --> 00:10:18,802
You said it; I don't disagree.
267
00:10:18,827 --> 00:10:20,570
I will make my decision this week.
268
00:10:20,595 --> 00:10:22,205
It's between you two idiots.
269
00:10:23,281 --> 00:10:24,914
Get out.
270
00:10:27,439 --> 00:10:29,112
He's in a bad mood.
271
00:10:29,181 --> 00:10:31,615
Yeah, he got Rebected again.
272
00:10:31,683 --> 00:10:34,274
Oh, that's my term for when
he gets rejected by Rebecca.
273
00:10:34,299 --> 00:10:35,919
Spread it around;
make sure I get credit.
274
00:10:35,988 --> 00:10:38,221
I'm getting this case. I always do.
275
00:10:38,290 --> 00:10:40,378
As my Krav Maga trainer says,
276
00:10:40,403 --> 00:10:42,461
I'm a mitnakesh.
277
00:10:42,486 --> 00:10:44,594
That's Hebrew for "killer," bitch.
278
00:10:56,580 --> 00:10:59,517
Sir, I'd like to make a deal with you.
279
00:11:00,509 --> 00:11:03,914
I get you Rebecca, you give
me the Yamamoto overtime.
280
00:11:03,982 --> 00:11:07,327
"Get me Rebecca"? How?
281
00:11:07,352 --> 00:11:08,985
You don't want to know.
282
00:11:09,054 --> 00:11:10,453
Do you know?
283
00:11:10,736 --> 00:11:12,289
No, no, no.
284
00:11:12,357 --> 00:11:14,824
But, um, I will make it happen.
285
00:11:14,893 --> 00:11:16,993
Great. You do that, the case is yours.
286
00:11:17,062 --> 00:11:18,695
All right.
287
00:11:18,764 --> 00:11:20,363
- We're done.
- We're done, yes.
288
00:11:28,073 --> 00:11:29,506
Could I have some sugar for my milk?
289
00:11:29,574 --> 00:11:30,874
No way. You do that?
290
00:11:31,403 --> 00:11:32,602
I do that, too.
291
00:11:32,892 --> 00:11:36,479
Twins. Jinx. Gasp!
292
00:11:36,548 --> 00:11:39,950
Oh, um, that's a
little surprise for you.
293
00:11:40,299 --> 00:11:42,163
I'll just tell you, um, my best
friend has some kids your age,
294
00:11:42,187 --> 00:11:43,547
so I thought we could all hang out.
295
00:11:43,588 --> 00:11:45,992
- Hi!
- Hey!
296
00:11:46,017 --> 00:11:49,906
Oh, hi! You must be Tucker, I'm Paula.
297
00:11:49,931 --> 00:11:50,904
Hello.
298
00:11:51,447 --> 00:11:52,662
You're adorable.
299
00:11:53,966 --> 00:11:56,299
And you look just like Rebecca.
300
00:11:56,324 --> 00:11:58,158
And these are my boys.
301
00:11:59,986 --> 00:12:01,304
Comatose and Lump.
302
00:12:01,373 --> 00:12:03,327
Hello, nice to meet you.
303
00:12:03,352 --> 00:12:04,918
- Hey.
- 'Sup, cuz?
304
00:12:04,943 --> 00:12:09,145
Okay, so what cool young
thing should we all do today?
305
00:12:09,214 --> 00:12:10,680
Should we, uh, take a selfie?
306
00:12:10,749 --> 00:12:12,649
Make a meme? Get lit?
307
00:12:12,718 --> 00:12:14,951
Yas, queen?
308
00:12:15,020 --> 00:12:16,519
Stop.
309
00:12:16,588 --> 00:12:20,256
Okay, I got tickets for the
new escape room at the mall.
310
00:12:21,750 --> 00:12:23,593
Oh, my God, I've been
wanting to go to that.
311
00:12:23,662 --> 00:12:25,095
I thought it could be fun.
312
00:12:25,163 --> 00:12:27,497
Oh, God, Paula,
that-that's so sweet of you,
313
00:12:27,566 --> 00:12:30,367
it's just, I'm the
littlest bit claustrophobic.
314
00:12:30,435 --> 00:12:31,668
It kind of reminds me
315
00:12:31,737 --> 00:12:33,570
of the scariest movie, Panic Room.
316
00:12:33,638 --> 00:12:34,882
No, no, no. I used to be terrified
317
00:12:34,906 --> 00:12:36,139
of the Panic Room, too.
318
00:12:36,296 --> 00:12:37,862
Get out of my house!
319
00:12:37,887 --> 00:12:40,187
Twins! Jinx! Gasp!
320
00:12:40,212 --> 00:12:42,045
Wow.
321
00:12:42,114 --> 00:12:44,990
Okay, well, you guys don't
need us to have a good time.
322
00:12:45,015 --> 00:12:46,793
So, I guess, I'll just take
323
00:12:46,818 --> 00:12:49,753
these screen zombies to the escape room.
324
00:12:51,089 --> 00:12:53,476
Maybe that'll breathe
some life into them.
325
00:12:53,501 --> 00:12:54,924
Okay, come on.
326
00:12:54,993 --> 00:12:56,593
Let's go.
327
00:12:56,618 --> 00:12:59,219
Get in the car.
328
00:12:59,765 --> 00:13:01,576
All right, we'll see you guys later.
329
00:13:01,600 --> 00:13:03,366
- Okay.
- Bye.
330
00:13:03,435 --> 00:13:04,901
Have the best time ever.
331
00:13:04,970 --> 00:13:06,547
You know, if you ask me,
you could learn a thing
332
00:13:06,572 --> 00:13:08,765
from Tucker Bunch; he's
a beam of damn sunshine.
333
00:13:11,243 --> 00:13:13,276
Okay. No biggie.
334
00:13:13,345 --> 00:13:14,522
So what do you want to do instead?
335
00:13:14,546 --> 00:13:16,980
Well, I've never been
to Los Angeles before.
336
00:13:17,049 --> 00:13:18,915
Maybe there's some
tourist stuff we could do?
337
00:13:18,984 --> 00:13:21,184
That's a great idea.
I actually haven't done
338
00:13:21,253 --> 00:13:22,852
any of the tourist stuff, either.
339
00:13:22,921 --> 00:13:24,165
I mean, I only go to a few places
340
00:13:24,189 --> 00:13:25,874
and they're all in West Covina.
341
00:13:26,324 --> 00:13:29,536
Whitefeather, Sugar Face,
the boba place, Home Base,
342
00:13:29,561 --> 00:13:31,672
Paula's house, although
usually it's just the kitchen.
343
00:13:31,696 --> 00:13:33,396
Hey, I just had an idea.
344
00:13:33,465 --> 00:13:34,964
How about the Hollywood
345
00:13:35,033 --> 00:13:36,544
- Walk of Fame?
- Murder Tour... Walk of Fame.
346
00:13:36,568 --> 00:13:38,046
- We're not on the same page there...
- Oh, yeah.
347
00:13:38,070 --> 00:13:39,981
... but your idea's better;
it's good for kids, yeah.
348
00:13:40,005 --> 00:13:41,114
Great. Let's do it.
349
00:13:41,139 --> 00:13:45,171
I am dying, dying to
see Monty Hall's star.
350
00:13:45,929 --> 00:13:47,988
He's the original host
of Let's Make a Deal.
351
00:13:48,777 --> 00:13:49,732
Wow.
352
00:13:49,757 --> 00:13:52,826
Well, that is a cool,
vintage-y factoid.
353
00:13:52,851 --> 00:13:53,750
Let's go to Hollywood Boulevard.
354
00:13:53,819 --> 00:13:55,117
Yay.
355
00:14:04,468 --> 00:14:07,464
I looked it up online, Monty's
star should be right down there.
356
00:14:07,532 --> 00:14:08,812
Hmm.
357
00:14:09,901 --> 00:14:11,634
Huh, look at that.
358
00:14:12,148 --> 00:14:14,471
I wonder what those
boys are in line for?
359
00:14:14,496 --> 00:14:16,283
Maybe it's like a cool
exhibit or something.
360
00:14:16,308 --> 00:14:17,885
Oh, yeah. Let's ask
that boy and his mother.
361
00:14:17,909 --> 00:14:19,109
Boy!
362
00:14:19,177 --> 00:14:20,810
Boy, why are you crossing?
363
00:14:21,138 --> 00:14:22,904
Why, don't you know?
364
00:14:22,929 --> 00:14:24,948
They're casting Peter Pan, the musical.
365
00:14:25,016 --> 00:14:26,182
Darling, great.
366
00:14:26,251 --> 00:14:27,851
But it's "Peet-ah", like pita bread,
367
00:14:27,919 --> 00:14:30,019
not "Peet-er" like Tater Tots.
368
00:14:30,088 --> 00:14:31,387
Okay, sorry, Mother.
369
00:14:31,456 --> 00:14:33,857
It's okay. He takes notes amazingly.
370
00:14:34,390 --> 00:14:38,461
Oh, an audition. That sounds so fun.
371
00:14:38,566 --> 00:14:40,006
When I was a kid, I would have killed
372
00:14:40,031 --> 00:14:42,335
to audition for, like, anything.
373
00:14:42,811 --> 00:14:44,945
I love musicals so much.
374
00:14:44,970 --> 00:14:46,035
Really?
375
00:14:46,104 --> 00:14:48,071
- I love them, too.
- No way.
376
00:14:48,140 --> 00:14:51,207
My favorite one is this obscure,
off-brand, animated one.
377
00:14:51,276 --> 00:14:52,675
You've probably never heard of it.
378
00:14:52,744 --> 00:14:53,676
Slumbered.
379
00:14:53,789 --> 00:14:55,355
Get out of my house.
380
00:14:55,380 --> 00:14:56,813
Twins! Jinx! Gasp!
381
00:14:57,983 --> 00:15:00,171
Wait. This is insane.
382
00:15:00,196 --> 00:15:03,330
I-I've never met anyone else
who loves the movie Slumbered.
383
00:15:03,355 --> 00:15:04,888
Uh, what's your favorite song?
384
00:15:04,913 --> 00:15:07,481
I mean, it's obvious.
385
00:15:07,953 --> 00:15:12,695
♪ In one indescribable instant ♪
386
00:15:13,015 --> 00:15:17,515
♪ The whole world falls away ♪
387
00:15:17,609 --> 00:15:23,069
♪ In one indescribable instant ♪
388
00:15:23,094 --> 00:15:27,430
♪ You'll know just what to say ♪
389
00:15:27,498 --> 00:15:32,968
♪ In one indescribable instant ♪
390
00:15:33,037 --> 00:15:36,972
♪ Your heart will speak the truth ♪
391
00:15:37,041 --> 00:15:40,543
♪ 'Cause in that one indescribable ♪
392
00:15:40,611 --> 00:15:43,079
♪ Magical, mystical ♪
393
00:15:43,147 --> 00:15:47,750
♪ Endless, incredible instant ♪
394
00:15:47,819 --> 00:15:50,586
♪ I'll try to match you ♪
395
00:15:50,655 --> 00:15:53,756
♪ No, I was harmonizing ♪
396
00:15:53,825 --> 00:15:57,426
♪ Oh, okay, I'll go down a third ♪
397
00:15:57,495 --> 00:15:59,028
You know, it's fine.
398
00:15:59,097 --> 00:16:00,429
You finish it, it's fine.
399
00:16:00,498 --> 00:16:03,733
♪ The only words you'll need ♪
400
00:16:03,801 --> 00:16:07,069
♪ Are I love... ♪
401
00:16:08,439 --> 00:16:10,973
♪ You... ♪
402
00:16:11,042 --> 00:16:13,909
♪ Ooh... ♪
403
00:16:13,978 --> 00:16:17,880
♪ Ooh... ♪
404
00:16:17,949 --> 00:16:20,516
♪ Ooh. ♪
405
00:16:23,221 --> 00:16:24,587
Oh, my God.
406
00:16:24,655 --> 00:16:26,722
That's my brother! My
brother's a good singer.
407
00:16:26,791 --> 00:16:28,224
And it's not just in his head.
408
00:16:28,292 --> 00:16:29,191
Oh, my God.
409
00:16:29,260 --> 00:16:30,626
We got to get you to that audition.
410
00:16:30,695 --> 00:16:32,728
Oh, no. I-I couldn't.
411
00:16:32,797 --> 00:16:34,263
Yeah, yeah, but you want to, right?
412
00:16:34,332 --> 00:16:37,433
Well, I-I've never
admitted it to anyone,
413
00:16:37,502 --> 00:16:39,568
but it would be a dream come true.
414
00:16:39,637 --> 00:16:42,489
Come on. We're gonna make you a star.
415
00:16:44,682 --> 00:16:45,814
Yes.
416
00:17:00,934 --> 00:17:02,641
You are three noble knights
who have been imprisoned
417
00:17:02,665 --> 00:17:05,824
in the lair of the evil
king, Nestor Asgard.
418
00:17:05,849 --> 00:17:08,387
Best of luck. The clock starts now.
419
00:17:09,286 --> 00:17:11,953
Okay.
420
00:17:12,022 --> 00:17:13,889
Where do we start?
421
00:17:14,106 --> 00:17:18,100
Maybe with the chest with
the giant, obvious keyhole?
422
00:17:18,162 --> 00:17:19,833
Mom, I don't want to do this.
423
00:17:19,858 --> 00:17:22,264
I paid good money.
Shut up and participate.
424
00:17:22,289 --> 00:17:24,356
Whatever.
425
00:17:30,307 --> 00:17:33,301
Oh. Sweet, I found a key.
426
00:17:33,326 --> 00:17:34,826
Well done.
427
00:17:44,548 --> 00:17:46,448
Don't look at me, I failed cursive.
428
00:17:46,924 --> 00:17:48,690
I mean, who even reads these scribbles?
429
00:17:48,715 --> 00:17:49,781
What am I, Egyptian?
430
00:17:49,893 --> 00:17:51,193
I don't have my glasses.
431
00:17:51,261 --> 00:17:52,594
Ah, give it to me.
432
00:17:52,663 --> 00:17:53,862
I can read calligraphy 'cause
433
00:17:53,887 --> 00:17:55,453
of that renfaire girl I went out with.
434
00:17:55,478 --> 00:17:58,245
- Oh, yeah. Gwendolyn with the huge...
- What? Who?
435
00:17:58,402 --> 00:17:59,634
... boobs.
436
00:17:59,703 --> 00:18:00,863
You don't remember Gwendolyn?
437
00:18:00,904 --> 00:18:02,003
They dated for months.
438
00:18:02,028 --> 00:18:03,649
Now Brendan and I go
to renfaires every week.
439
00:18:03,674 --> 00:18:05,173
Yeah.
440
00:18:05,242 --> 00:18:07,108
- We're the Brothers Proctor.
- Wait.
441
00:18:07,133 --> 00:18:09,066
No one told me any of this.
442
00:18:09,091 --> 00:18:10,956
All of a sudden, I'm finding out
443
00:18:10,981 --> 00:18:12,770
about a secret girlfriend
with giant boobs
444
00:18:12,795 --> 00:18:16,096
and you two willingly
hang out with each other?
445
00:18:17,862 --> 00:18:20,963
Cool. A secret compartment, awesome!
446
00:18:22,848 --> 00:18:24,926
Oh.
447
00:18:25,010 --> 00:18:28,478
- Yeah!
- My sons are strangers to me.
448
00:18:31,590 --> 00:18:33,098
Oh.
449
00:18:34,676 --> 00:18:37,293
Hello, there. I have a young man
450
00:18:37,318 --> 00:18:38,784
who would like to tread the boards.
451
00:18:40,377 --> 00:18:41,843
My little brother wants to audition.
452
00:18:41,912 --> 00:18:42,992
Do you have an appointment?
453
00:18:43,887 --> 00:18:46,548
Yeah. No appointment, no audition.
454
00:18:46,617 --> 00:18:48,361
Listen, I understand you have
to say that to most people,
455
00:18:48,385 --> 00:18:50,583
- but my brother is so talented.
- Ma'am.
456
00:18:50,616 --> 00:18:53,593
- Please step aside.
- Is there some kind of problem?
457
00:18:55,287 --> 00:18:57,504
- Colin?
- Oh, Rebecca.
458
00:18:57,529 --> 00:18:59,122
Uh, what are you doing here?
459
00:18:59,147 --> 00:19:00,880
Why, I'm playing Cap'n Hook.
460
00:19:00,905 --> 00:19:03,028
Oh. Right, r-right.
461
00:19:03,053 --> 00:19:04,653
Uh, yeah, love the costume.
462
00:19:04,678 --> 00:19:06,245
Costume? What do you mean?
463
00:19:06,270 --> 00:19:08,336
I'm just togged up in my glad rags.
464
00:19:08,405 --> 00:19:09,778
Sure.
465
00:19:09,803 --> 00:19:13,879
Hey, so the last time I
saw you I was very rude
466
00:19:13,904 --> 00:19:15,577
when we attempted to make that, um...
467
00:19:15,602 --> 00:19:17,401
... you know, that sex tape.
468
00:19:17,426 --> 00:19:20,227
Um, but, my little
brother is so talented
469
00:19:20,252 --> 00:19:21,693
and it would mean the world to me
470
00:19:21,718 --> 00:19:23,685
if you could help him
get an audition, please.
471
00:19:24,955 --> 00:19:27,155
See you soon, Samantha.
472
00:19:27,180 --> 00:19:28,346
Bye, Ben.
473
00:19:28,371 --> 00:19:29,938
Your young lad will be hard-pressed
474
00:19:29,963 --> 00:19:32,330
to beat young Ben
Blackthorne over there.
475
00:19:36,333 --> 00:19:38,567
Can you do the accent, son?
476
00:19:38,635 --> 00:19:41,136
Yes, sir, I believe I can.
477
00:19:41,204 --> 00:19:43,104
I believe I could do a smashing job.
478
00:19:43,173 --> 00:19:46,408
Hmm. Tucker. That was
excellent. Oh, my God.
479
00:19:46,433 --> 00:19:49,067
My word, you are a talent, son.
480
00:19:49,092 --> 00:19:52,402
After all, accents is acting.
481
00:19:52,916 --> 00:19:54,115
Hmm.
482
00:19:54,140 --> 00:19:56,374
Samantha,
483
00:19:56,486 --> 00:19:59,154
are you sure we can't fit in
484
00:19:59,222 --> 00:20:01,423
one more lil' urchin?
485
00:20:02,160 --> 00:20:03,725
For you, Colin?
486
00:20:03,794 --> 00:20:05,393
Get in there, kid.
487
00:20:05,462 --> 00:20:08,163
Off you go. Thank you, thank you,
thank you, thank you.
488
00:20:08,231 --> 00:20:10,332
- Break a leg. Break a leg.
- Okay.
489
00:20:10,400 --> 00:20:11,678
Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you. Thank you.
490
00:20:11,702 --> 00:20:13,168
Thank you.
491
00:20:13,236 --> 00:20:15,637
Oh, I can't listen.
492
00:20:15,662 --> 00:20:17,495
I got to pace, I got to pace.
493
00:20:23,680 --> 00:20:25,614
Oh, wow.
494
00:20:25,682 --> 00:20:27,749
I already signed in, so...
495
00:20:33,129 --> 00:20:36,925
Aha. Tucker Bunch.
496
00:20:36,994 --> 00:20:38,770
Little brother has big dreams.
497
00:20:38,795 --> 00:20:41,352
Wants to be Peter Pan... got it.
498
00:20:42,418 --> 00:20:44,466
Hello there.
And you are... ?
499
00:20:44,534 --> 00:20:47,637
My name is Tucker Bunch.
I hail from Santa Fe, New Mexico,
500
00:20:47,662 --> 00:20:49,360
and I'm here for one thing only.
501
00:20:50,307 --> 00:20:51,473
Hit it!
502
00:20:51,541 --> 00:20:54,843
♪ Every night I lie awake ♪
503
00:20:54,911 --> 00:20:57,946
♪ Dreaming of my big break ♪
504
00:20:58,015 --> 00:21:01,149
♪ I just gotta act
and dance and sing ♪
505
00:21:01,218 --> 00:21:05,320
♪ 'Cause I only ever
wanted one thing ♪
506
00:21:05,389 --> 00:21:09,257
♪ I wanna be a pre-teen
Hollywood train wreck ♪
507
00:21:09,326 --> 00:21:11,780
♪ A cautionary tale ♪
508
00:21:11,812 --> 00:21:14,880
♪ I want the kind of fame
that'll warp my brain ♪
509
00:21:14,948 --> 00:21:17,834
♪ And eventually land me in jail ♪
510
00:21:17,859 --> 00:21:21,528
♪ I wanna sue my parents
for emancipation ♪
511
00:21:21,596 --> 00:21:24,029
♪ After they get caught
stealing from me ♪
512
00:21:24,054 --> 00:21:28,034
♪ I wanna be on the set
of The Walking Dead ♪
513
00:21:28,103 --> 00:21:30,470
♪ When I lose my virginity ♪
514
00:21:30,539 --> 00:21:33,172
♪ I wanna be a child star ♪
515
00:21:33,241 --> 00:21:34,674
♪ It's gonna be bad ♪
516
00:21:34,743 --> 00:21:36,342
♪ Child star! ♪
517
00:21:36,411 --> 00:21:39,646
♪ It's gonna be sad, oh, yeah ♪
518
00:21:41,416 --> 00:21:44,050
♪ Childhood is overrated ♪
519
00:21:44,119 --> 00:21:46,819
♪ I'm ready for mine to end ♪
520
00:21:46,888 --> 00:21:50,490
♪ I want to have
agents and assistants ♪
521
00:21:50,559 --> 00:21:53,192
♪ Instead of actual friends ♪
522
00:21:53,261 --> 00:21:55,889
♪ I'll be abusive and
emotionally stunted ♪
523
00:21:57,332 --> 00:21:59,532
♪ But everyone will tolerate me ♪
524
00:21:59,601 --> 00:22:03,102
♪ They'll have no choice
because my face and my voice ♪
525
00:22:03,171 --> 00:22:07,106
♪ Makes them all so much money ♪
526
00:22:07,175 --> 00:22:11,077
♪ I want to have a teenage
Hollywood meltdown ♪
527
00:22:11,146 --> 00:22:14,247
♪ Be a pop culture casualty ♪
528
00:22:14,316 --> 00:22:17,884
♪ I want a bunch of addictions
to illegal prescriptions ♪
529
00:22:17,953 --> 00:22:20,587
♪ And completely lose
touch with reality ♪
530
00:22:20,655 --> 00:22:24,624
♪ I want to squander
everything I've worked for ♪
531
00:22:24,693 --> 00:22:26,759
♪ And spiral out of control ♪
532
00:22:26,828 --> 00:22:28,861
♪ I want to wake up in Van Nuys ♪
533
00:22:28,930 --> 00:22:32,865
♪ With a bunch of sketchy guys
I've never even met before ♪
534
00:22:32,934 --> 00:22:34,167
♪ I want to be a ♪
535
00:22:34,235 --> 00:22:35,602
♪ Child star! ♪
536
00:22:35,670 --> 00:22:37,337
Who are you guys?
537
00:22:37,405 --> 00:22:38,571
♪ Child star! ♪
538
00:22:38,640 --> 00:22:40,707
Can I have some more money?
539
00:22:40,775 --> 00:22:43,476
Oh, baby, I've hit rock bottom.
540
00:22:43,545 --> 00:22:44,911
I can't live like this.
541
00:22:44,980 --> 00:22:46,946
It's time to get my act together.
542
00:22:47,015 --> 00:22:48,848
Refocus on my passion.
543
00:22:48,917 --> 00:22:53,086
♪ I want to be a desperate
Hollywood has-been ♪
544
00:22:53,154 --> 00:22:55,555
♪ A classic "Where are they now?" ♪
545
00:22:55,624 --> 00:22:59,492
♪ I'll try to clean up my
act and get my agent back ♪
546
00:22:59,561 --> 00:23:02,362
♪ And salvage my
reputation somehow ♪
547
00:23:02,430 --> 00:23:05,498
♪ I'll do a lot of
community service ♪
548
00:23:05,567 --> 00:23:07,934
♪ And apologize to Meryl Streep ♪
549
00:23:08,003 --> 00:23:10,570
♪ I want to be that
former child star ♪
550
00:23:10,639 --> 00:23:12,171
♪ That you'll see in bars ♪
551
00:23:12,240 --> 00:23:17,591
♪ And say, "Hey, there's that
bloated, bankrupt creep" ♪
552
00:23:17,616 --> 00:23:19,116
♪ Child star! ♪
553
00:23:19,841 --> 00:23:21,891
And now, my song.
554
00:23:21,916 --> 00:23:23,096
Thank you. The...
555
00:23:23,121 --> 00:23:26,523
- What?
- Oh, I've heard enough. Thank you.
556
00:23:37,481 --> 00:23:38,631
They wouldn't let me finish.
557
00:23:38,656 --> 00:23:40,266
- What?
- I don't know why.
558
00:23:40,335 --> 00:23:42,201
Well, did you ask if you
could just sing again?
559
00:23:42,270 --> 00:23:43,903
I asked. I asked if I could try again,
560
00:23:43,928 --> 00:23:45,127
and they said, "Thank you."
561
00:23:45,466 --> 00:23:48,333
And we know what that means.
That means "Screw you."
562
00:23:50,067 --> 00:23:51,377
Miss, I'm so sorry
563
00:23:51,446 --> 00:23:53,166
to bother you, but my
little brother did not
564
00:23:53,214 --> 00:23:55,415
get a fair shot in there.
I mean, he's so talented.
565
00:23:55,483 --> 00:23:57,884
Can you please ask the director
if he can just sing again?
566
00:23:57,909 --> 00:23:59,075
I am the director.
567
00:23:59,187 --> 00:24:00,353
Oh, right. It's the theater.
568
00:24:00,422 --> 00:24:01,521
You have female directors.
569
00:24:01,546 --> 00:24:04,167
Auditions are over! Thank you.
570
00:24:05,960 --> 00:24:07,860
Don't "thank you" me.
571
00:24:08,015 --> 00:24:10,249
You can go "thank you" yourself.
572
00:24:16,974 --> 00:24:19,872
I ruined it. I ruin everything. I...
573
00:24:19,897 --> 00:24:21,463
Hey, hey, hey, stop that.
574
00:24:21,620 --> 00:24:22,919
Please don't say that stuff.
575
00:24:23,615 --> 00:24:26,783
You are wonderful and special.
576
00:24:31,783 --> 00:24:33,563
Hey, Colin, over here.
577
00:24:34,435 --> 00:24:36,389
Rebecca, is that you?
578
00:24:36,958 --> 00:24:39,206
Yes, I just saw you. We
had a full conversation.
579
00:24:39,231 --> 00:24:40,927
Listen, where did the director go?
580
00:24:40,952 --> 00:24:42,251
Probably her hotel.
581
00:24:42,574 --> 00:24:43,940
It's right there.
582
00:24:43,965 --> 00:24:45,264
Okay. Thanks.
583
00:24:46,121 --> 00:24:47,817
Let's go. Come on.
584
00:24:50,317 --> 00:24:53,050
Okay, this seems a
little crazy, but no, no,
585
00:24:53,074 --> 00:24:55,541
I can justify this to myself,
because I love my brother.
586
00:24:55,610 --> 00:24:57,009
Huh? What?
587
00:24:57,078 --> 00:24:59,412
Nothing. Shh. Okay, we're here.
588
00:24:59,481 --> 00:25:01,314
All right. Get ready.
589
00:25:03,342 --> 00:25:04,742
Room service.
590
00:25:05,817 --> 00:25:07,097
Oh, my God.
591
00:25:07,122 --> 00:25:08,831
No, no, no, no.
Just-just wait a second.
592
00:25:08,856 --> 00:25:10,834
Wait a second. Sing, Tucker.
Sing. Just start singing.
593
00:25:10,859 --> 00:25:11,859
What... ?
594
00:25:14,606 --> 00:25:17,269
♪ In one indescribable instant... ♪
595
00:25:17,294 --> 00:25:19,441
No. Stop. Stop. Stop.
596
00:25:19,466 --> 00:25:20,599
What is wrong with you?
597
00:25:20,667 --> 00:25:21,733
This is insane.
598
00:25:21,802 --> 00:25:22,856
You are a terrible mother.
599
00:25:22,881 --> 00:25:24,680
Huh? No. I'm not a mother. You're wrong.
600
00:25:24,705 --> 00:25:26,049
I'm actually an older
half-sibling who's just trying
601
00:25:26,073 --> 00:25:27,817
to make up for lost time
to her younger half-sibling,
602
00:25:27,842 --> 00:25:29,786
which, to be fair, I had
some mental health issues.
603
00:25:29,810 --> 00:25:31,254
I have borderline personality disorder,
604
00:25:31,278 --> 00:25:33,118
but I'm better now, and
just, he's so talented!
605
00:25:33,143 --> 00:25:35,023
I don't care about your back story.
606
00:25:35,048 --> 00:25:36,699
Besides, the part has
already been cast.
607
00:25:36,724 --> 00:25:38,442
But... Ugh.
608
00:25:40,192 --> 00:25:41,691
I'm sorry, buddy.
609
00:25:41,716 --> 00:25:43,265
We tried.
610
00:25:43,368 --> 00:25:45,602
Let's go before she calls the police.
611
00:25:59,373 --> 00:26:01,614
Oh, thank God. Are you my masseur?
612
00:26:01,639 --> 00:26:03,122
Come on in. You won't
believe the day I've had.
613
00:26:03,147 --> 00:26:06,244
No, no. I-I'm here to tell you
you're making a big mistake.
614
00:26:06,313 --> 00:26:08,680
You need to cast that
delightful Tucker Bunch.
615
00:26:08,705 --> 00:26:10,605
What is it with people and Tucker Bunch?
616
00:26:10,630 --> 00:26:12,364
The kid started his
audition with a speech
617
00:26:12,404 --> 00:26:15,005
about how he wants to
be a star at any cost.
618
00:26:15,030 --> 00:26:16,474
He is a troubled child actor,
619
00:26:16,499 --> 00:26:18,599
and he hasn't even booked anything yet.
620
00:26:18,632 --> 00:26:20,474
Now go away. Thank you.
621
00:26:20,521 --> 00:26:22,321
Look, okay, I-I need this.
622
00:26:22,390 --> 00:26:25,496
Back story... my boss wants
to date Tucker's sister.
623
00:26:25,521 --> 00:26:28,027
You give Tucker the part, I
take credit for it with my boss,
624
00:26:28,095 --> 00:26:29,473
he takes credit for it
with Tucker's sister.
625
00:26:29,498 --> 00:26:31,974
It's a simple transaction,
everyone wins!
626
00:26:35,636 --> 00:26:38,604
Okay, let me just get
this bellhop shirt off.
627
00:26:41,440 --> 00:26:42,673
Hey, I got to pee.
628
00:26:43,007 --> 00:26:44,941
I'll be right back.
629
00:26:54,521 --> 00:26:57,556
So... who else have you dated?
630
00:26:58,458 --> 00:27:01,126
What other themed festivals
have you guys gone to?
631
00:27:01,195 --> 00:27:02,906
Mom, can we just play the
game? I'm kind of into it now.
632
00:27:02,931 --> 00:27:05,198
We need to find the chalice.
633
00:27:05,266 --> 00:27:06,699
Okay.
634
00:27:06,767 --> 00:27:08,801
Ooh.
635
00:27:11,472 --> 00:27:13,205
These gems have letters on them.
636
00:27:13,274 --> 00:27:16,075
I think these need to be
arranged in some kind of order.
637
00:27:16,187 --> 00:27:17,653
Hey, well, here's an "N"
638
00:27:17,678 --> 00:27:20,279
and an "R," and there's 12 holes.
639
00:27:20,348 --> 00:27:21,814
"Nestor Asgard" has 12 letters.
640
00:27:21,882 --> 00:27:23,315
- Okay, just...
- Nestor. Okay.
641
00:27:23,384 --> 00:27:24,850
... tell me why I don't know
642
00:27:24,875 --> 00:27:26,841
about a major thing in my son's life.
643
00:27:26,866 --> 00:27:28,510
Maybe because all you
ever ask us is whether
644
00:27:28,535 --> 00:27:30,413
our homework is done and
whether our underwear is clean.
645
00:27:30,438 --> 00:27:32,601
Yeah, so? Is it?
646
00:27:32,626 --> 00:27:34,338
No, because I don't like
washing my underwear too much
647
00:27:34,362 --> 00:27:35,461
because of the environment.
648
00:27:35,529 --> 00:27:37,463
You think about the
environment? Since when?
649
00:27:37,531 --> 00:27:39,465
Since I became a vegetarian,
which is, of course,
650
00:27:39,490 --> 00:27:41,235
the best way to reduce
your carbon footprint.
651
00:27:41,260 --> 00:27:42,826
Oh, my God.
652
00:27:42,851 --> 00:27:44,817
I don't know anything
about my children. Nothing.
653
00:27:44,842 --> 00:27:46,508
Because we're not children anymore, Mom.
654
00:27:46,707 --> 00:27:49,141
- I'm a grown-ass man.
- And I'm a grown-ass boy.
655
00:27:50,211 --> 00:27:52,144
Nestor Asgard isn't working.
656
00:27:53,214 --> 00:27:56,083
Oh, don't look at me.
I know nothing, apparently.
657
00:27:59,099 --> 00:28:01,353
What have you done to
get the Yamamoto case?
658
00:28:01,422 --> 00:28:03,422
I think my work speaks for itself.
659
00:28:05,274 --> 00:28:06,793
Hmm.
660
00:28:06,818 --> 00:28:09,528
Okay, I-I-I... I see
what you did there.
661
00:28:09,553 --> 00:28:10,553
Uh, you worked
662
00:28:10,664 --> 00:28:12,564
hard, but I worked smart.
663
00:28:12,841 --> 00:28:15,334
I tried to get Rebecca's
brother the lead in Peter Pan...
664
00:28:15,403 --> 00:28:18,003
Sunil! How is that relevant?
665
00:28:18,072 --> 00:28:19,705
Thank you. Yes, exactly.
666
00:28:20,031 --> 00:28:22,231
Would you give us a
minute, Mrs. Hernandez?
667
00:28:24,981 --> 00:28:26,311
Hmm?
668
00:28:26,380 --> 00:28:28,480
I'm really sorry for overstepping, sir,
669
00:28:28,549 --> 00:28:30,215
by interfering in
Rebecca's personal life.
670
00:28:30,284 --> 00:28:32,384
That would've been
fine if it had worked,
671
00:28:32,731 --> 00:28:34,353
but you got nowhere with Rebecca?
672
00:28:34,422 --> 00:28:37,623
Technically, no, but I did
find out some more info.
673
00:28:37,691 --> 00:28:39,625
She has a brother, and he's here.
674
00:28:39,650 --> 00:28:41,050
Already knew that. Get out.
675
00:28:41,075 --> 00:28:43,608
Okay, did you know that
she's desperate to please him?
676
00:28:43,633 --> 00:28:45,867
And he's obsessed with her.
677
00:28:45,892 --> 00:28:47,466
I saw him reading her old diary.
678
00:28:47,535 --> 00:28:49,375
I mean, like, flipping
through it, studying it.
679
00:28:49,403 --> 00:28:51,527
I'm like, "Respect her
privacy. It says 'Keep out'."
680
00:28:51,552 --> 00:28:54,072
Oh, you are so dumb, Sunil.
681
00:28:54,141 --> 00:28:56,141
- I need that diary.
- Why?
682
00:28:56,210 --> 00:28:58,290
Because she says I don't
understand her, and you just
683
00:28:58,345 --> 00:29:00,646
told me there's a book
with all that info in there.
684
00:29:00,671 --> 00:29:02,388
Yeah, that's a great idea.
685
00:29:02,575 --> 00:29:05,284
Which is why I told it to you,
686
00:29:05,309 --> 00:29:07,730
and why you should give
me the Yamamoto case.
687
00:29:07,755 --> 00:29:10,155
Nice try. Mrs. H, you got Yamamoto!
688
00:29:10,224 --> 00:29:12,658
Whatever. Whatever.
689
00:29:12,726 --> 00:29:14,860
Okay, that diary is
probably meaningless.
690
00:29:14,929 --> 00:29:17,262
She's a grown-ass lady.
I'm sure she's changed.
691
00:29:17,331 --> 00:29:21,033
Oh, my sweet, sweet,
simple, stupid Sunil.
692
00:29:21,101 --> 00:29:22,801
No, she hasn't changed, okay?
693
00:29:22,870 --> 00:29:26,238
I love Rebecca, but she's
basically a dramatic teenager.
694
00:29:28,409 --> 00:29:30,142
My life is over.
695
00:29:30,211 --> 00:29:32,010
What am I gonna do?
696
00:29:32,079 --> 00:29:33,278
My dreams are dead!
697
00:29:34,450 --> 00:29:36,548
Tucker, come on.
698
00:29:36,617 --> 00:29:38,684
No, they're not.
699
00:29:38,752 --> 00:29:40,597
I'm sorry I got you into
that whole auditioning thing,
700
00:29:40,621 --> 00:29:41,621
but it was a whim.
701
00:29:42,786 --> 00:29:45,491
Hey, come on. Let's do something else.
702
00:29:45,559 --> 00:29:46,592
Let's go the beach!
703
00:29:47,052 --> 00:29:49,425
Huh? It's only two hours away.
704
00:29:49,450 --> 00:29:51,196
We can go rollerblading
in the bike lane.
705
00:29:51,265 --> 00:29:52,665
I have rollerblades I've never used.
706
00:29:52,733 --> 00:29:54,133
I-I got them when I first moved here
707
00:29:54,158 --> 00:29:55,602
to impress this guy. It's a whole thing.
708
00:29:55,627 --> 00:29:57,994
Rollerblading... I don't know.
709
00:30:00,856 --> 00:30:03,942
Um, actually, um, could I see them?
710
00:30:04,011 --> 00:30:05,878
I've only read about them.
711
00:30:05,903 --> 00:30:07,583
- I've never seen a pair in real life.
- Really?
712
00:30:07,608 --> 00:30:08,641
I'm gonna get them.
713
00:30:21,328 --> 00:30:23,262
I don't have much
time. What do you want?
714
00:30:25,833 --> 00:30:27,032
What are you doing here?
715
00:30:28,318 --> 00:30:30,152
Listen, little boy, you took something
716
00:30:30,200 --> 00:30:32,411
that doesn't belong to
you, and now it's time
717
00:30:32,436 --> 00:30:35,692
for you to give the thing that
doesn't belong to you... to me.
718
00:30:36,005 --> 00:30:37,364
What?
719
00:30:37,427 --> 00:30:39,160
The diary. I want the diary.
720
00:30:39,273 --> 00:30:41,573
Look, I love your sister.
721
00:30:42,630 --> 00:30:44,363
I just think I need to
understand her better.
722
00:30:44,388 --> 00:30:46,311
I think that's what she wants, too.
723
00:30:46,716 --> 00:30:49,831
It's very sweet, and you know
it will work like a charm.
724
00:30:49,856 --> 00:30:51,950
I've been using it for days.
725
00:30:52,163 --> 00:30:54,263
How do you think I get
that puppet to dance?
726
00:30:55,945 --> 00:30:57,912
I give it to you, what do I get?
727
00:31:00,411 --> 00:31:01,710
What do you want?
728
00:31:01,735 --> 00:31:04,969
I... want... Pan.
729
00:31:07,349 --> 00:31:08,724
Hmm.
730
00:31:08,992 --> 00:31:10,591
Wait. No, no, no, no, no, no. I...
731
00:31:10,660 --> 00:31:11,926
I got it. It's an anagram.
732
00:31:11,995 --> 00:31:13,472
Rearrange the letters in "Nestor Asgard"
733
00:31:13,496 --> 00:31:14,962
to form "Dragon's Tears,"
734
00:31:15,031 --> 00:31:16,475
you know, the potion
that saves the kingdom.
735
00:31:16,499 --> 00:31:18,432
Okay. Uh-huh.
736
00:31:21,004 --> 00:31:22,703
Oh, my God, it worked!
737
00:31:22,772 --> 00:31:24,639
Tommy's smart. Nothing
makes sense anymore.
738
00:31:27,466 --> 00:31:29,138
_
739
00:31:30,513 --> 00:31:33,202
Wow. I thought you guys
were just dead weight
740
00:31:33,227 --> 00:31:36,461
slowing down the
minivan, but I was wrong.
741
00:31:36,486 --> 00:31:38,152
Gee, big compliment, Mom.
742
00:31:40,356 --> 00:31:41,856
- Oh.
- Hear ye, hear ye.
743
00:31:41,925 --> 00:31:43,325
You have completed your noble quest.
744
00:31:43,359 --> 00:31:45,426
You have saved the kingdom.
745
00:31:45,495 --> 00:31:47,395
Prepare to be knighted
746
00:31:47,463 --> 00:31:51,098
- and have your photo taken
over there for our website. - Oh.
747
00:31:51,167 --> 00:31:52,776
Okay. Here. Take it,
take it, take it.
748
00:31:52,801 --> 00:31:55,102
Please tag us.
Please Yelp us.
749
00:31:55,367 --> 00:31:56,767
Please kill me.
750
00:31:56,981 --> 00:31:58,349
Can you get closer?
751
00:31:58,374 --> 00:31:59,707
Come on, come on.
752
00:31:59,776 --> 00:32:00,908
Closer.
753
00:32:00,977 --> 00:32:02,510
Come here. Oh. Okay.
754
00:32:02,579 --> 00:32:04,345
You know what?
755
00:32:04,973 --> 00:32:06,456
I think we might be on our way.
756
00:32:06,481 --> 00:32:09,961
That's not what he meant, Mom.
757
00:32:09,986 --> 00:32:11,397
Oh, my God, that took forever.
758
00:32:11,421 --> 00:32:12,998
I have not sorted through
my closet in years.
759
00:32:13,022 --> 00:32:15,144
I found this old Fett Regoso hoodie.
760
00:32:15,169 --> 00:32:16,668
It's practically a collector's item.
761
00:32:17,412 --> 00:32:18,611
Tucker?
762
00:32:18,636 --> 00:32:19,566
Have you seen Tucker?
763
00:32:19,591 --> 00:32:22,277
Uh, no.
764
00:32:23,333 --> 00:32:24,532
Where were you?
765
00:32:24,601 --> 00:32:27,268
Oh, uh, I-I was just outside.
766
00:32:27,425 --> 00:32:28,724
Um...
767
00:32:28,749 --> 00:32:30,415
thinking about puberty.
768
00:32:30,557 --> 00:32:32,427
Yeah. I still think about it, too.
769
00:32:33,284 --> 00:32:34,284
Oh!
770
00:32:34,309 --> 00:32:36,510
Oh, thank God.
771
00:32:38,505 --> 00:32:40,892
Hello? Yeah, this is Rebecca Bunch.
772
00:32:41,518 --> 00:32:44,219
Oh, my God. Are you serious?
773
00:32:44,765 --> 00:32:46,898
Are you thanking with me right now?
774
00:32:48,005 --> 00:32:49,223
Wow.
775
00:32:49,292 --> 00:32:50,292
What? What?
776
00:32:50,360 --> 00:32:51,503
That was Angela, the director.
777
00:32:51,527 --> 00:32:53,561
She said she had a
change of heart, and...
778
00:32:54,528 --> 00:32:57,098
- you're Peter now.
- What? Oh, my gosh.
779
00:32:57,166 --> 00:32:58,532
What a whirlwind.
780
00:32:58,601 --> 00:33:01,302
You got the part! This is unbelievable.
781
00:33:02,082 --> 00:33:03,564
We have to celebrate.
782
00:33:03,911 --> 00:33:05,883
Should we go get a
funky treat for teens?
783
00:33:06,087 --> 00:33:09,022
Yeah! Yeah, let's go get a Rebetzel.
784
00:33:10,377 --> 00:33:11,894
Huh.
785
00:33:17,887 --> 00:33:20,731
Oh. Hey, Rebecca. I didn't
realize you were here.
786
00:33:20,756 --> 00:33:23,888
I-I'll give you your space, so I'll go.
787
00:33:26,006 --> 00:33:27,638
Wait, um...
788
00:33:28,036 --> 00:33:30,831
I want to say something, and
then I'll leave you alone.
789
00:33:31,283 --> 00:33:33,350
I won't forgive myself
if I don't say it.
790
00:33:35,013 --> 00:33:36,396
Yeah.
791
00:33:38,374 --> 00:33:39,825
Go ahead.
792
00:33:40,489 --> 00:33:42,886
Rebecca, look, I know
I've made mistakes.
793
00:33:42,911 --> 00:33:44,278
Bad ones.
794
00:33:44,586 --> 00:33:46,886
And I realize I've been
going about this all wrong,
795
00:33:46,911 --> 00:33:48,794
but you have to know...
796
00:33:50,713 --> 00:33:53,087
you are the only thing
that makes me happy.
797
00:33:53,156 --> 00:33:54,400
When I'm not with you,
798
00:33:54,424 --> 00:33:56,457
my heart aches.
799
00:33:56,526 --> 00:33:58,959
I feel like I've lived in a
quiet forest my whole life,
800
00:33:58,984 --> 00:34:01,272
and then you showed up, and
the world starts to sing.
801
00:34:01,445 --> 00:34:04,447
I love you, plain and simple.
802
00:34:04,948 --> 00:34:09,251
You've awakened my heart
and unlocked my soul.
803
00:34:09,349 --> 00:34:11,149
Oh, my God, that is so sweet.
804
00:34:11,174 --> 00:34:13,240
That is so sweet. What a great guy.
805
00:34:13,840 --> 00:34:15,006
Nathaniel...
806
00:34:16,198 --> 00:34:17,912
you memorized the ending speech
807
00:34:17,980 --> 00:34:19,347
from the movie Slumbered?
808
00:34:19,415 --> 00:34:20,915
Hmm?
809
00:34:21,221 --> 00:34:23,284
Yeah. Yes.
810
00:34:23,353 --> 00:34:24,719
That's-that's exactly what I did.
811
00:34:24,787 --> 00:34:26,520
I-I know you love that movie so much,
812
00:34:26,589 --> 00:34:29,457
so I watched it last night.
813
00:34:29,482 --> 00:34:31,524
You what? Yeah, I-I, uh...
814
00:34:31,549 --> 00:34:32,981
I streamed it.
815
00:34:34,346 --> 00:34:35,963
No, you did not.
816
00:34:36,399 --> 00:34:38,299
It's in the vault.
817
00:34:38,706 --> 00:34:40,000
You can't stream it.
818
00:34:40,069 --> 00:34:41,613
I mean, I should know.
I've written the company
819
00:34:41,637 --> 00:34:43,571
countless amounts of letters.
820
00:34:45,963 --> 00:34:48,186
How did you even know I
like that ending speech?
821
00:34:48,211 --> 00:34:49,643
I mean, I've thought about it.
822
00:34:49,712 --> 00:34:51,278
I fantasized about it. I used to...
823
00:34:51,347 --> 00:34:55,116
think about the way my dream
man would say that to me.
824
00:34:55,184 --> 00:34:57,218
Well, that's it. You've mentioned it.
825
00:34:57,393 --> 00:34:58,953
No. No. No, I didn't.
826
00:34:59,021 --> 00:35:00,788
I don't... I don't tell people that.
827
00:35:00,813 --> 00:35:02,424
I've actually never told
anyone that because it's...
828
00:35:03,096 --> 00:35:04,325
it's silly and embarrassing.
829
00:35:04,394 --> 00:35:06,127
I mean, it's not even
a well-written speech.
830
00:35:06,195 --> 00:35:07,461
Well... I mean,
831
00:35:07,753 --> 00:35:09,720
the only thing I ever told was my diary.
832
00:35:09,745 --> 00:35:11,768
I used to write it over
and over in my diary.
833
00:35:16,706 --> 00:35:18,806
It was him. He stole it.
834
00:35:18,875 --> 00:35:20,641
He flew to New Mexico
835
00:35:20,666 --> 00:35:22,466
and stole your diary
from behind the toilet
836
00:35:22,491 --> 00:35:24,041
at Dad's house. Okay. He...
837
00:35:25,901 --> 00:35:27,348
What an invasion.
838
00:35:27,417 --> 00:35:28,883
Not surprising, coming from someone
839
00:35:28,951 --> 00:35:31,840
that wears that offensively
titled Fett Regoso cologne.
840
00:35:31,865 --> 00:35:33,064
What, Nathaniel,
841
00:35:33,089 --> 00:35:34,855
you just thought you could "Take Her"?
842
00:35:34,947 --> 00:35:37,815
- Well, I'm taking her away from you.
- Oh.
843
00:35:40,643 --> 00:35:41,829
Oh, you paid the director
844
00:35:41,898 --> 00:35:43,275
for him to get the part, didn't you?
845
00:35:44,567 --> 00:35:46,967
Wow. How much did that set you back?
846
00:35:47,036 --> 00:35:49,336
A lot. A lot.
847
00:35:49,405 --> 00:35:50,682
I-I thought that we were
gonna get back together.
848
00:35:50,706 --> 00:35:53,107
- That's why I did it. I...
- Tucker? Hey.
849
00:35:53,176 --> 00:35:56,110
Wait in the back. I'll
deal with you in a second.
850
00:36:00,849 --> 00:36:02,749
You I'm gonna deal with now.
851
00:36:05,495 --> 00:36:08,462
- Dude.
- I-I know. I... It's bad.
852
00:36:08,487 --> 00:36:10,754
Okay, but what was I supposed to do?
853
00:36:10,823 --> 00:36:12,543
I-I thought that we
would get back together,
854
00:36:12,591 --> 00:36:14,760
and we would look back on
this and laugh.
855
00:36:14,785 --> 00:36:16,271
You know what, Nathaniel, I get it.
856
00:36:16,295 --> 00:36:17,961
You love me. Loud and clear.
857
00:36:18,030 --> 00:36:21,916
But the way you show
your love is so messed up.
858
00:36:21,941 --> 00:36:23,267
I mean, you just now
859
00:36:23,335 --> 00:36:24,335
tried to manipulate me,
860
00:36:24,360 --> 00:36:26,227
and you manipulated a child.
861
00:36:26,252 --> 00:36:28,019
Oh, if anyone manipulated anyone,
862
00:36:28,044 --> 00:36:29,476
it was him who manipulated me.
863
00:36:29,501 --> 00:36:31,875
So you're-you're blaming a
13-year-old for your actions?
864
00:36:31,911 --> 00:36:33,166
No. It's inexcusable.
865
00:36:33,191 --> 00:36:34,612
You know what, I was wrong.
866
00:36:34,637 --> 00:36:37,237
It's not that you don't know who I am.
867
00:36:37,950 --> 00:36:40,440
It's that we're not
right for each other,
868
00:36:40,465 --> 00:36:42,221
and we never will be.
869
00:36:42,246 --> 00:36:47,301
All we do when we're together
is scheme and cheat and lie.
870
00:36:47,350 --> 00:36:50,306
I am bad for you, and
you are bad for me.
871
00:36:50,331 --> 00:36:52,273
So you know what? We are done.
872
00:36:52,298 --> 00:36:53,497
We're not on a break,
873
00:36:53,522 --> 00:36:55,088
not thinking about it. We're done.
874
00:36:57,536 --> 00:36:58,936
Please go.
875
00:37:08,399 --> 00:37:11,500
So, does your mom even know you're here?
876
00:37:11,922 --> 00:37:14,685
No. She thinks I'm with Dad.
877
00:37:14,754 --> 00:37:16,820
And you just came here for the audition?
878
00:37:17,750 --> 00:37:20,324
I-I really wanted to
get to know you, really.
879
00:37:20,595 --> 00:37:22,495
The audition just happened to be here.
880
00:37:24,891 --> 00:37:27,464
Yeah. Yeah, I did.
881
00:37:27,489 --> 00:37:30,200
But Tucker, why did you lie?
882
00:37:30,269 --> 00:37:31,769
Why didn't you just tell me
883
00:37:31,837 --> 00:37:34,086
you wanted to come to
L.A. for an audition?
884
00:37:34,594 --> 00:37:36,440
I mean, you could have trusted me.
885
00:37:36,509 --> 00:37:39,969
Trust you? You've
ignored me all my life.
886
00:37:40,346 --> 00:37:43,531
And no adult has ever
understood me. Ever.
887
00:37:43,556 --> 00:37:45,423
But you know how similar we are.
888
00:37:46,641 --> 00:37:47,718
Oh.
889
00:37:50,556 --> 00:37:52,125
So all those similarities we had,
890
00:37:52,150 --> 00:37:54,491
those were just things
you stole from my diary?
891
00:37:54,560 --> 00:37:56,026
It started out that way.
892
00:37:56,051 --> 00:37:58,451
I was just saying all the
things you said in the diary.
893
00:37:58,820 --> 00:38:00,831
I never watched Slumbered,
894
00:38:00,900 --> 00:38:03,400
- and I think milk with sugar
in it is gross. - Mm.
895
00:38:03,425 --> 00:38:05,359
But we are the same.
896
00:38:06,133 --> 00:38:09,139
Just t-tell me you'll forgive me.
897
00:38:10,094 --> 00:38:11,141
Oh, my God.
898
00:38:11,166 --> 00:38:15,875
I'm a horrible, stupid,
dumb, ugly, fat, stupid...
899
00:38:15,900 --> 00:38:18,280
Tucker, you don't have
to keep quoting my diary.
900
00:38:18,320 --> 00:38:19,498
What?
901
00:38:19,523 --> 00:38:21,656
That's not in the diary.
That's just how I feel.
902
00:38:22,047 --> 00:38:23,531
All the time.
903
00:38:24,007 --> 00:38:26,226
- Really?
- Yes.
904
00:38:27,083 --> 00:38:29,183
That's finally the truth.
905
00:38:31,297 --> 00:38:33,964
Yeah, Tucker, I need your mom's number.
906
00:38:34,213 --> 00:38:36,146
The real one this time.
907
00:38:40,758 --> 00:38:42,439
She hates me now.
908
00:38:42,464 --> 00:38:45,477
Nah, no. I don't think she does.
909
00:38:55,392 --> 00:38:58,626
So, I talked to your mom.
910
00:38:58,935 --> 00:39:01,828
Uh, and she was... upset.
911
00:39:02,161 --> 00:39:03,733
But glad you're safe.
912
00:39:03,758 --> 00:39:06,592
And then we talked
about some other stuff,
913
00:39:07,710 --> 00:39:10,067
and she agreed that when you get home,
914
00:39:10,635 --> 00:39:12,535
she's gonna find you a good therapist.
915
00:39:13,606 --> 00:39:15,873
That's what I needed
when I was your age.
916
00:39:15,941 --> 00:39:17,632
You think I need therapy?
917
00:39:17,657 --> 00:39:19,891
Oh, no, I know you need therapy.
918
00:39:20,671 --> 00:39:22,346
And then I called Dad.
919
00:39:22,414 --> 00:39:23,874
Oh, no.
920
00:39:24,229 --> 00:39:26,096
And this summer,
921
00:39:26,121 --> 00:39:27,553
he's sending you to theater camp.
922
00:39:28,483 --> 00:39:29,887
What?
923
00:39:30,858 --> 00:39:31,989
Wait, really?
924
00:39:32,057 --> 00:39:33,457
He'd never do that.
925
00:39:33,492 --> 00:39:35,592
I talked him into it.
926
00:39:36,030 --> 00:39:37,761
Also, I'm paying for the theater camp,
927
00:39:37,786 --> 00:39:39,840
and I'm also paying to replace you
928
00:39:39,865 --> 00:39:41,465
at the construction site this summer,
929
00:39:41,490 --> 00:39:45,038
'cause he is... literally
the worst person.
930
00:39:45,063 --> 00:39:47,181
Neither here nor there. Anyway, Tucker,
931
00:39:47,206 --> 00:39:49,539
but...
932
00:39:49,608 --> 00:39:52,042
you can't do Peter Pan.
933
00:39:52,111 --> 00:39:54,655
It's just not right, you know?
934
00:39:54,680 --> 00:39:56,346
You lied and schemed to get it.
935
00:39:56,415 --> 00:39:57,741
You didn't earn it.
936
00:39:57,766 --> 00:40:00,166
But that's how show
business works, right?
937
00:40:00,314 --> 00:40:03,319
That is true. Yes. But...
938
00:40:04,529 --> 00:40:06,729
it's just no way to live your life.
939
00:40:07,778 --> 00:40:09,645
So, uh, you're gonna go home soon.
940
00:40:09,670 --> 00:40:11,226
Okay.
941
00:40:12,757 --> 00:40:14,331
So do you hate me now?
942
00:40:14,400 --> 00:40:16,500
No. Hey, no.
943
00:40:16,568 --> 00:40:17,868
I love you.
944
00:40:18,991 --> 00:40:20,604
I love you, too.
945
00:40:20,629 --> 00:40:22,462
- Jinx.
- Jinx.
946
00:40:22,618 --> 00:40:25,776
But before you go home,
there is something we need to do.
947
00:40:26,070 --> 00:40:27,336
Okay.
948
00:40:29,618 --> 00:40:32,552
I kept a VCR just for this movie.
949
00:40:35,155 --> 00:40:38,322
All right, so, I recorded it from TV,
950
00:40:38,347 --> 00:40:40,748
so there are some commercials.
951
00:40:40,773 --> 00:40:42,406
Take Her.
952
00:40:42,431 --> 00:40:44,765
Take Her, by Fett Regoso.
953
00:40:44,964 --> 00:40:46,596
Here we go.
954
00:40:46,665 --> 00:40:48,665
Ooh.
955
00:40:55,752 --> 00:40:57,985
Does the animation get better?
956
00:40:58,452 --> 00:41:00,385
Oh, no.
957
00:41:09,922 --> 00:41:11,855
Take her.
958
00:41:12,562 --> 00:41:16,059
When you see what you want, take her.
959
00:41:16,128 --> 00:41:17,361
Take her. Take her.
960
00:41:17,429 --> 00:41:18,729
Take her. Take her.
961
00:41:18,754 --> 00:41:19,853
No matter what she says,
962
00:41:19,878 --> 00:41:22,445
turn that no into a yes.
963
00:41:22,601 --> 00:41:25,535
Take... No, sorry. Cut, cut, cut.
964
00:41:25,604 --> 00:41:26,837
Cut. Take five.
965
00:41:26,862 --> 00:41:28,549
Guys, I'm not sure about this.
966
00:41:28,574 --> 00:41:30,540
Something doesn't feel right.
967
00:41:30,609 --> 00:41:32,409
You're right. You're
right, it's all wrong.
968
00:41:32,434 --> 00:41:34,267
The women should be naked.
969
00:41:34,292 --> 00:41:35,991
The men need bigger boots.
970
00:41:36,016 --> 00:41:38,625
No, I just don't think
this is gonna age well.
971
00:41:38,650 --> 00:41:41,619
No offense. This is kind of why
I wanted a female director.
972
00:41:41,687 --> 00:41:45,088
In television? I love this guy.
973
00:41:45,113 --> 00:41:47,747
I love it. Let's take it from the top!
974
00:41:47,860 --> 00:41:51,382
-- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe --
-- www.addic7ed.com --
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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