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1
00:00:19,579 --> 00:00:20,968
It's no use.
2
00:00:21,494 --> 00:00:24,292
I can't get it out of my mind,
even with yoga.
3
00:00:25,199 --> 00:00:27,561
Well, ya can't say
thatcha didn't try.
4
00:00:27,562 --> 00:00:30,560
-And ya can't say that I didn't try.
-I appreciate that.
5
00:00:30,561 --> 00:00:33,839
But, Xena, it was one of
my favorite scrolls, a new one...
6
00:00:33,840 --> 00:00:36,672
...charting our history
through the prism of time.
7
00:00:36,673 --> 00:00:39,093
-It was a more intimate...
-...Examination of our relationship...
8
00:00:39,094 --> 00:00:42,086
...and on and on. You've been talking about it
ever since we left Paraeus.
9
00:00:42,087 --> 00:00:44,474
I can't recreate
the beauty,... the essence.
10
00:00:44,475 --> 00:00:46,464
Then, Gabrielle, go back for it.
11
00:00:47,416 --> 00:00:48,874
Gabrielle...
12
00:00:48,875 --> 00:00:51,258
The prince needs my help in Arcon.
I'm gonna go ahead.
13
00:00:51,259 --> 00:00:53,877
You go back to Paraeus
and catch up with me when you can.
14
00:00:53,878 --> 00:00:56,474
-Are you sure?
-Sure, I'm sure.
15
00:00:56,595 --> 00:00:59,378
-Go on, make us both happy.
-Thank you.
16
00:00:59,379 --> 00:01:01,373
-Don't mention it.
-Ok.
17
00:01:05,077 --> 00:01:07,567
Well, when I say "Don't mention it."
I mean...
18
00:01:08,123 --> 00:01:09,723
...you can mention it.
19
00:01:13,203 --> 00:01:16,955
It's just a figure of speech.
You don't have to take it literally.
20
00:01:17,359 --> 00:01:19,554
It wouldn't kill ya
to maybe to look back or something.
21
00:01:22,480 --> 00:01:26,179
Aw, rats.
All right, Argo, it's just you and me.
22
00:01:27,762 --> 00:01:30,773
-Welcome! Welcome!
-...It was her underwear!
23
00:01:37,543 --> 00:01:39,942
You're much funnier than Euripides!
24
00:01:40,142 --> 00:01:41,416
I am!
25
00:01:50,617 --> 00:01:52,613
Not in your lifetime.
Thank you.
26
00:01:55,830 --> 00:01:57,822
-We came through here...
-She'll never work in this town again.
27
00:01:57,829 --> 00:02:01,020
We walked this way...
We said hi to the tavernkeeper... We almost...
28
00:02:02,908 --> 00:02:03,799
Joxer...
29
00:02:05,040 --> 00:02:06,447
Lousy drunk!
30
00:02:06,448 --> 00:02:09,448
I'm not drunk!
I just trip over things like that.
31
00:02:10,173 --> 00:02:12,377
-Joxer, what are you doing?
-Hi.
32
00:02:13,800 --> 00:02:14,707
Gabrielle...
33
00:02:15,100 --> 00:02:16,022
Wow!
34
00:02:16,023 --> 00:02:17,404
Your hair...
35
00:02:17,444 --> 00:02:19,662
Did that hurt?
What's that you're wearing?
36
00:02:19,933 --> 00:02:22,533
-Sari.
-Don't apologize. It looks good.
37
00:02:23,864 --> 00:02:26,465
Joxer, I'm looking for something.
It's very important.
38
00:02:26,505 --> 00:02:29,105
It's close to my heart,
and I know it's here somewhere.
39
00:02:29,570 --> 00:02:32,491
You mean, like a feeling?
D'ya get it often?
40
00:02:32,516 --> 00:02:34,715
Like now, for example?
41
00:02:34,795 --> 00:02:37,261
Yeah, because I know the scroll
is here somewhere.
42
00:02:37,311 --> 00:02:39,516
Oh, scroll...
43
00:02:40,506 --> 00:02:42,712
Well, maybe you left it
in one of these theaters.
44
00:02:42,722 --> 00:02:44,102
I wish I had.
45
00:02:44,112 --> 00:02:46,192
Paraeus is the great Appian Way.
46
00:02:46,242 --> 00:02:48,927
You know, I could spend a week
going to all these plays.
47
00:02:48,952 --> 00:02:51,650
Yeah.
Yeah, I love theater.
48
00:02:51,989 --> 00:02:54,785
Euripi...cles and Sopha...more...
49
00:02:55,115 --> 00:02:57,908
-Euripides. Sophocles
-Yeah, those guys, too.
50
00:02:57,909 --> 00:03:01,557
Ah... Sophocles... If I could
pick one person to be my mentor...
51
00:03:01,786 --> 00:03:03,645
His writing is perfect.
52
00:03:03,735 --> 00:03:07,113
Hey! Whaddya say, you and me
go to a Sophocles play?
53
00:03:07,123 --> 00:03:08,728
I'll bring a bag 'a oats and,
you know...
54
00:03:08,738 --> 00:03:12,148
-Joxer, I really have to find my...
-Masterpiece!
55
00:03:13,365 --> 00:03:16,171
-Is that what you're looking for?
-My scroll...
56
00:03:16,669 --> 00:03:18,661
This is it.
Thank you. Thank you.
57
00:03:18,831 --> 00:03:21,386
-Where did you find it?
-I was sitting in the little girls' house...
58
00:03:21,387 --> 00:03:23,206
...and there it was, right beside me.
59
00:03:23,536 --> 00:03:25,680
I'm sorry, I don't have a lot of money
for a reward.
60
00:03:25,681 --> 00:03:29,379
Reward schmeward! The Fates have
already rewarded me enough.
61
00:03:29,419 --> 00:03:33,038
I am Zera,
a producer of plays!
62
00:03:34,012 --> 00:03:36,741
This is my associate, Milo.
63
00:03:37,399 --> 00:03:38,607
I'm Gabrielle.
64
00:03:40,249 --> 00:03:41,653
...The writer.
65
00:03:41,783 --> 00:03:44,992
I'm Joxer... Her associate.
Joxer, the Mighty.
66
00:03:45,042 --> 00:03:48,442
You've probably read about me
in those scrolls, didn't she?
67
00:03:49,652 --> 00:03:51,258
Oh, that was you.
68
00:03:54,164 --> 00:03:55,654
Very good!
69
00:03:55,821 --> 00:03:58,901
I must say, in that stall,
I saw greatness.
70
00:03:58,951 --> 00:04:01,343
-Really?
-Your scroll... I was...
71
00:04:01,393 --> 00:04:03,809
...swept away by the majesty
of your words...
72
00:04:03,819 --> 00:04:07,884
...The brilliance, the soul-changing
dynamic of your vision.
73
00:04:07,917 --> 00:04:11,791
This work
must be seen on the stage.
74
00:04:13,563 --> 00:04:15,178
And I...
75
00:04:15,395 --> 00:04:16,400
I...
76
00:04:16,729 --> 00:04:20,269
...would be so humbled
if you would allow me to produce it...
77
00:04:23,354 --> 00:04:25,480
That's very flattering.
I...
78
00:04:27,591 --> 00:04:28,903
I can't.
79
00:04:30,262 --> 00:04:32,673
Xena needs me in Arcon.
I...
80
00:04:33,243 --> 00:04:36,075
Besides, my scroll is meant to be read,
not performed.
81
00:04:36,205 --> 00:04:40,158
Gabrielle, I know we're just like typical,
flashy, show-biz types to you...
82
00:04:40,208 --> 00:04:44,207
...but... I got into this business
because I believe in the arts.
83
00:04:44,377 --> 00:04:48,858
There is so much garbage around but,
when I saw your scrolls, well...
84
00:04:49,388 --> 00:04:51,975
...This is substance.
85
00:04:54,360 --> 00:04:56,957
Don't the people deserve to see it?
86
00:04:58,367 --> 00:04:59,757
Please...
87
00:05:01,790 --> 00:05:03,076
Please...
88
00:05:04,999 --> 00:05:08,057
To think that people could be touched
by sum'in' left in a bathroom...
89
00:05:08,067 --> 00:05:11,379
If I were to rewrite it,
for the stage,...
90
00:05:11,642 --> 00:05:14,404
...I could show people
all the lessons I learned in India...
91
00:05:14,414 --> 00:05:16,805
...about peace and happiness.
92
00:05:19,191 --> 00:05:21,733
-I'll do it.
-Thank you!
93
00:05:21,743 --> 00:05:23,362
Thank you, Gabrielle!
94
00:05:23,928 --> 00:05:27,084
There is theater in your soul.
95
00:05:28,651 --> 00:05:32,943
"And the very air sang with harmony
as Xena lay down her sword."
96
00:05:33,082 --> 00:05:37,229
"And Humungus, ennobled by her gesture,
lay his down as well."
97
00:05:38,759 --> 00:05:39,963
Ok.
98
00:05:40,413 --> 00:05:43,205
I'll get back to you right after I send word
to Xena.
99
00:05:43,255 --> 00:05:45,363
Ah, yeah. Well, pretty good.
100
00:05:45,364 --> 00:05:47,369
"Humungus was ennobled..."
All that.
101
00:05:48,121 --> 00:05:49,306
Pretty good.
102
00:05:52,506 --> 00:05:55,909
"The air sang with harmony"?
103
00:05:56,588 --> 00:05:57,777
I know!
104
00:05:58,508 --> 00:06:01,510
Zera, baby,
what scam are you up to now?
105
00:06:01,520 --> 00:06:03,735
Usually, I can smell the money.
106
00:06:03,745 --> 00:06:06,310
But I'm not sure
what I'm smelling here.
107
00:06:06,311 --> 00:06:08,710
What if I told you
we found the golden fleece...
108
00:06:08,711 --> 00:06:10,714
...and her name is Gabrielle?
109
00:06:10,844 --> 00:06:13,442
You bad girl.
What are you up to?
110
00:06:14,154 --> 00:06:16,822
If the village witnesses
this garbage...
111
00:06:16,845 --> 00:06:19,261
...they'll throw your playwright
right out of town.
112
00:06:19,271 --> 00:06:21,464
Oh, dear heart, if she's lucky.
113
00:06:21,474 --> 00:06:23,874
The people I'm thinking of
are liable to kill her.
114
00:06:33,459 --> 00:06:36,548
In the time of ancient gods,...
115
00:06:38,848 --> 00:06:39,900
...warlords...
116
00:06:40,252 --> 00:06:41,312
...and kings...
117
00:06:41,787 --> 00:06:45,502
...a land in turmoil
cried out for a hero.
118
00:06:54,397 --> 00:06:56,643
She was Xena.
119
00:06:56,981 --> 00:06:58,583
A mighty princess...
120
00:06:58,584 --> 00:07:00,683
...forged in the heat of battle.
121
00:07:05,322 --> 00:07:06,649
The power...
122
00:07:08,340 --> 00:07:09,868
The passion...
123
00:07:12,882 --> 00:07:14,200
The danger...
124
00:07:19,729 --> 00:07:22,321
Her courage will change the world.
125
00:07:22,913 --> 00:07:26,772
XENA, THE WARRIOR PRINCESS
126
00:07:31,953 --> 00:07:34,768
Athens Academy Theater presents
Sophocles' "The Women of Trachis"
127
00:07:35,315 --> 00:07:36,879
Titan Playhouse direct from Roma!
128
00:07:36,880 --> 00:07:38,494
"A funny thing happened
the way to the Acropolis" Original cast!
129
00:07:38,495 --> 00:07:40,281
By-The-Gods Performing Arts Center
30th Smash Week!
130
00:07:40,282 --> 00:07:42,965
"Oh, Zeus"
A divine comedy. Laugh of be smitten!
131
00:07:43,320 --> 00:07:45,320
Apollo
132
00:07:52,905 --> 00:07:55,257
What a dump.
Where's the theater?
133
00:07:55,267 --> 00:07:59,469
This is the theater, dear boy.
The Apollo is known throughout the world.
134
00:08:01,500 --> 00:08:03,123
As a dive.
135
00:08:06,237 --> 00:08:07,568
Here it is.
136
00:08:10,136 --> 00:08:11,948
Needs a little cleaning.
137
00:08:12,077 --> 00:08:14,758
...And a touch of paint... Here...
138
00:08:17,374 --> 00:08:18,561
There...
139
00:08:20,863 --> 00:08:23,369
There... But...
140
00:08:23,511 --> 00:08:25,111
...I can see it.
141
00:08:25,549 --> 00:08:27,960
I knew I made
the right choice.
142
00:08:28,092 --> 00:08:30,746
You have an innate vision, Gabrielle.
143
00:08:31,065 --> 00:08:32,681
You see through the exterior...
144
00:08:32,682 --> 00:08:34,642
...to the ghosts
of performances past.
145
00:08:34,692 --> 00:08:36,220
Ghost?
Where? Who?
146
00:08:38,391 --> 00:08:39,972
All the way down here!
147
00:08:40,012 --> 00:08:43,413
I'm a true believer
of the auteur theory.
148
00:08:43,423 --> 00:08:45,405
You are the creator, the writer.
149
00:08:45,415 --> 00:08:48,576
I cannot allow
someone else to interpret your vision.
150
00:08:48,586 --> 00:08:51,601
Therefore,
I want you to also be the director.
151
00:08:51,611 --> 00:08:53,416
-The director...
-Yes.
152
00:08:55,079 --> 00:08:57,537
I've never done anything like that before.
153
00:08:57,587 --> 00:08:59,773
Oh, but it must be you.
There's so much to take care of...
154
00:08:59,783 --> 00:09:02,299
...Casting, set design,
rehearsals...
155
00:09:02,324 --> 00:09:03,932
You'll need an assistant.
156
00:09:04,938 --> 00:09:06,230
Can I? Please?
157
00:09:06,240 --> 00:09:08,965
-Can I be an assistant?
-Enthusiasm is so important...
158
00:09:08,990 --> 00:09:11,318
You should give him
a task that is worthy of it.
159
00:09:11,319 --> 00:09:13,058
Ok, Joxer.
It's you.
160
00:09:13,083 --> 00:09:16,041
Great!
Ok, ok!
161
00:09:17,061 --> 00:09:19,471
We'll start by putting up
a new flap back there.
162
00:09:19,502 --> 00:09:21,512
...A whole aegean sunset.
163
00:09:21,534 --> 00:09:23,519
Then we'll have
to tear out these walls...
164
00:09:23,520 --> 00:09:25,527
...'cause we need
a new persineum, you know?
165
00:09:25,545 --> 00:09:27,758
And... I'll meet the press.
166
00:09:27,833 --> 00:09:30,319
How do you do?
How do you do?
167
00:09:30,888 --> 00:09:33,676
And... I'll hafta have lunch
with an agent.
168
00:09:34,429 --> 00:09:36,571
I know just the job
to start you with.
169
00:09:36,596 --> 00:09:38,297
Open casting call.
170
00:09:38,347 --> 00:09:41,549
"Gabrielle and Xena... A message of peace"
171
00:09:43,845 --> 00:09:44,669
Hey...
172
00:09:44,670 --> 00:09:47,138
Do you mind?
I'm trying to...
173
00:09:47,626 --> 00:09:50,043
...fill out my last will
and testament.
174
00:09:50,948 --> 00:09:52,954
A new play?
It sounds good.
175
00:09:53,193 --> 00:09:55,050
I can't wait to see it.
176
00:09:55,051 --> 00:09:57,867
Son of Zeus! I love the theater!
177
00:09:57,997 --> 00:10:01,381
This place is great!
Even the warlords love the theater.
178
00:10:04,679 --> 00:10:06,863
I have many skills.
179
00:10:18,093 --> 00:10:19,908
I'm too fat!
180
00:10:25,679 --> 00:10:28,692
But Xena, you followed
the violent approach in the past...
181
00:10:28,717 --> 00:10:31,366
...and what has come of it
but more violence?
182
00:10:32,779 --> 00:10:34,626
Thank you.
183
00:10:34,627 --> 00:10:35,399
Next.
184
00:10:38,288 --> 00:10:40,877
I didn't realize casting Gabrielle
would be so difficult.
185
00:10:40,878 --> 00:10:43,711
There's j...
It's a subtlety to the character.
186
00:10:43,752 --> 00:10:44,935
I'm no...
187
00:10:44,936 --> 00:10:46,420
Zera? Zera!
188
00:10:49,071 --> 00:10:50,334
Sorry, my dear.
189
00:10:50,353 --> 00:10:52,858
Your beautiful prose
already rings in my head.
190
00:10:52,908 --> 00:10:56,422
I'm looking for
a certain physical presence.
191
00:10:56,883 --> 00:10:58,882
Maybe you should take a break
from Gabrielles...
192
00:10:58,883 --> 00:11:00,683
...and try casting a Xena.
193
00:11:01,429 --> 00:11:02,644
You.
194
00:11:03,358 --> 00:11:06,542
You look like Xena.
Can you act?
195
00:11:09,705 --> 00:11:11,495
You were right, Gabrielle.
196
00:11:11,496 --> 00:11:13,933
How could have I been so blind?
197
00:11:15,750 --> 00:11:19,340
Ok.
Now, try it like Xena would.
198
00:11:24,677 --> 00:11:26,684
You were right, Gabrielle.
199
00:11:26,685 --> 00:11:29,191
How could have I been so blind?
200
00:11:32,808 --> 00:11:36,571
She'll do. Besides,
Xena requires more of an athlete. Great!
201
00:11:36,741 --> 00:11:38,556
Back to the Gabrielles.
202
00:11:44,158 --> 00:11:46,964
Never fear!
Xena is here!
203
00:11:48,200 --> 00:11:49,185
Minya?
204
00:11:49,186 --> 00:11:51,616
-What are you doing here?
-Auditioning.
205
00:11:51,681 --> 00:11:54,812
Now my dream of being Xena
can finally come true!
206
00:11:56,802 --> 00:12:00,303
I'm sorry, Minya,
but the part's been cast.
207
00:12:02,116 --> 00:12:03,787
What, this bag of bones?
208
00:12:03,837 --> 00:12:06,777
She couldn't shoo a mule,
let alone bust heads!
209
00:12:06,782 --> 00:12:10,242
I can too shoo a mule!
Shoo!
210
00:12:10,823 --> 00:12:12,023
Why, you...!
211
00:12:12,033 --> 00:12:14,288
Well, I see you have everything
well in hand, my dear.
212
00:12:14,338 --> 00:12:17,313
I must run 'n' meet with an inverstor.
Good luck, darling!
213
00:12:17,363 --> 00:12:19,230
I was born to play this role.
214
00:12:19,237 --> 00:12:22,740
As soon as I heard you were doing this,
I knew I was what you wanted.
215
00:12:23,693 --> 00:12:26,904
Minya, how about
playing a villain?
216
00:12:26,929 --> 00:12:29,680
They usually have the best roles.
I can write something for you.
217
00:12:30,170 --> 00:12:34,863
Well... I could still use
my Xena dark side, couldn't I?
218
00:12:38,596 --> 00:12:40,200
Do you see what I see?
219
00:12:40,652 --> 00:12:42,060
Oh, my gods!
220
00:12:47,335 --> 00:12:49,372
Oh, my gods, a centaur!
221
00:12:52,319 --> 00:12:54,694
I understand you're putting on a play.
222
00:12:55,835 --> 00:13:00,252
My name is Dustinus Hoofmanus.
I wish to audition.
223
00:13:00,342 --> 00:13:02,646
Centaurs do not do plays.
224
00:13:02,671 --> 00:13:05,643
There isn't a centaur
in the entire Appian Way.
225
00:13:06,348 --> 00:13:07,675
Incredible!
226
00:13:07,820 --> 00:13:09,796
Yes, I am.
227
00:13:12,945 --> 00:13:15,326
You're hired.
I don't care what I have to do...
228
00:13:15,327 --> 00:13:17,125
...you'll be in the script, I promise.
229
00:13:17,164 --> 00:13:20,383
Thank you.
Oh, by the way...
230
00:13:20,464 --> 00:13:24,176
I do not play quadrupeds.
Make sure the role reflects that.
231
00:13:24,406 --> 00:13:25,405
What?
232
00:13:25,415 --> 00:13:28,125
I do not play
four-legged creatures.
233
00:13:28,771 --> 00:13:32,166
-But you're a centaur...
-I am an actor!
234
00:13:32,167 --> 00:13:34,369
I refuse to limit myself!
235
00:13:39,078 --> 00:13:41,275
Gonna make him play a villain, too?
236
00:13:42,184 --> 00:13:43,770
A Sophocles play?
237
00:13:43,780 --> 00:13:47,342
A brand-new Sophocles play?
It's opening opposite mine.
238
00:13:47,352 --> 00:13:50,143
Yeah, everyone was talkin' about it.
Great art, huh?
239
00:13:50,188 --> 00:13:51,893
It's a disaster.
240
00:13:51,903 --> 00:13:55,153
Sophocles is the master of prose,
of feeling,...
241
00:13:55,194 --> 00:13:58,265
...of plumbing the emotional depths
of human existence.
242
00:13:58,427 --> 00:14:00,018
Writes good, too.
243
00:14:00,028 --> 00:14:04,300
No one's gonna see my play. Not with
his opening the same night as mine.
244
00:14:04,358 --> 00:14:07,009
Hey, that's not true, Gabrielle.
I just ran into this warlord.
245
00:14:07,059 --> 00:14:10,392
He said he was definitely coming
to see your play. Seriously.
246
00:14:10,882 --> 00:14:12,556
-That's it!
-What?
247
00:14:12,592 --> 00:14:16,197
Who cares who sees my play
as long as the right people see it?
248
00:14:16,683 --> 00:14:20,794
This warlord...
He wants to hear my message of peace.
249
00:14:20,844 --> 00:14:22,852
That's who my play speaks to.
250
00:14:23,279 --> 00:14:24,708
Fantastic.
251
00:14:25,366 --> 00:14:27,262
It's the artist's dream.
252
00:14:27,592 --> 00:14:29,476
"Art smart"...!
253
00:14:29,759 --> 00:14:31,883
All I care about
is getting my money...
254
00:14:31,884 --> 00:14:34,199
...so I can
buy those weapons my army needs.
255
00:14:34,251 --> 00:14:36,510
Don't worry, Kaelus.
As a major investor...
256
00:14:36,511 --> 00:14:38,662
...you'll get 75% of the profits.
257
00:14:38,715 --> 00:14:42,316
Gabrielle is doing this for next to nothing.
All the credit goes to her.
258
00:14:43,596 --> 00:14:45,028
Where's my drink?
259
00:14:47,398 --> 00:14:50,514
My little bowl of vipers,
let me get this right.
260
00:14:50,575 --> 00:14:53,178
You sold Kaelus,
the Conqueror,...
261
00:14:53,179 --> 00:14:55,236
...75 % interest in the play, right?
262
00:14:55,286 --> 00:14:57,293
-Yes, dearest.
-But you also sold...
263
00:14:57,294 --> 00:15:00,298
...75 % to the warlord
Therax, the Terrible.
264
00:15:00,323 --> 00:15:02,730
Doesn't quite add up.
If the play is a success...
265
00:15:02,740 --> 00:15:05,558
If it was a success,
they would both want their money.
266
00:15:05,559 --> 00:15:07,157
75% each.
267
00:15:07,232 --> 00:15:10,321
But you've read that play.
It can't possibly succeed.
268
00:15:11,274 --> 00:15:14,919
-And if it's a failure...
-...They won't even try to collect.
269
00:15:15,470 --> 00:15:17,665
And we keep the investments.
270
00:15:17,995 --> 00:15:21,787
They'll try to collect, all right,
but it won't be from us. It'll be from...
271
00:15:23,375 --> 00:15:26,380
-It had better be a success.
-Great.
272
00:15:33,624 --> 00:15:36,433
-Go on..
-Hi, Gaby.
273
00:15:36,723 --> 00:15:39,713
I like the colors
you're using on that flag.
274
00:15:39,763 --> 00:15:40,927
Thank you.
275
00:15:40,928 --> 00:15:43,934
It's the background vista
to Xena's redemption scene.
276
00:15:44,950 --> 00:15:47,156
Listen.
I was talkin' with Zera...
277
00:15:47,206 --> 00:15:50,751
...and she thinks that you might need
someone to take over some of the more...
278
00:15:50,776 --> 00:15:53,294
...noncreative aspects
of the show.
279
00:15:53,344 --> 00:15:55,504
Publicity, promotion,
ticket sales...
280
00:15:55,505 --> 00:15:57,885
Artists cannot be bothered
with trifles like that.
281
00:15:57,886 --> 00:16:00,792
-Right.
-Ok. Thanks, Joxer.
282
00:16:01,034 --> 00:16:03,619
That's why she made me the producer.
283
00:16:04,290 --> 00:16:06,502
You?
The producer?
284
00:16:06,543 --> 00:16:07,960
Of my play?
285
00:16:08,335 --> 00:16:12,136
Not in this world! Not in this life!
Not on this stage!
286
00:16:13,917 --> 00:16:15,887
Gabrielle... Please...
287
00:16:15,912 --> 00:16:18,103
Producers have no weight
in this community.
288
00:16:18,104 --> 00:16:21,316
The stage is for the artists.
We are merely functionaries.
289
00:16:21,866 --> 00:16:24,749
Does this require him to spend time
outside the theater?
290
00:16:24,759 --> 00:16:27,261
-Almost exclusively.
-Ok.
291
00:16:27,280 --> 00:16:29,469
Good!
Must rush, darling.
292
00:16:36,600 --> 00:16:37,805
Joxer...
293
00:16:38,401 --> 00:16:41,008
Selling a show takes more
than hanging posters.
294
00:16:41,036 --> 00:16:43,435
You really need to get inside
the minds of the people...
295
00:16:43,475 --> 00:16:47,479
-...and find out what they want.
-Hey, I'm a people.
296
00:16:47,519 --> 00:16:51,100
I know what I want.
I know what I like.
297
00:16:52,232 --> 00:16:55,726
Doesn't matter, anyway.
I know who my audience is.
298
00:16:56,802 --> 00:16:59,162
Well, that's great.
That's perfect.
299
00:16:59,442 --> 00:17:03,294
You're the creative side,
and I'm the business guy.
300
00:17:05,781 --> 00:17:07,183
What are you doing?
301
00:17:07,911 --> 00:17:10,196
This is the worst field I've ever seen.
302
00:17:10,561 --> 00:17:12,364
Because it's an ocean.
303
00:17:28,789 --> 00:17:31,910
I want you all to know
that this is a collaboration.
304
00:17:31,920 --> 00:17:33,114
That's right.
305
00:17:33,243 --> 00:17:35,426
The success or failure
of this show...
306
00:17:35,427 --> 00:17:38,061
...rides on all of us,
not one person.
307
00:17:38,123 --> 00:17:41,515
Well, I'm not gonna take the blame
if she turns out to be a lousy Xena.
308
00:17:43,389 --> 00:17:45,063
Wouldn't be my fault!
309
00:17:45,067 --> 00:17:48,869
It'd be... the Gabrielle!
She's got all the lines.
310
00:17:49,607 --> 00:17:52,412
Hey, who did get that part?
311
00:17:53,787 --> 00:17:58,252
Finding the right Gabrielle proved to be
more difficult than I expected.
312
00:17:58,491 --> 00:18:00,277
...Very difficult.
313
00:18:00,601 --> 00:18:02,856
I realized that only one person...
314
00:18:02,857 --> 00:18:06,324
...can fully capture
the spiritual essence of Gabrielle.
315
00:18:06,415 --> 00:18:09,013
Someone who actually
lived that truth.
316
00:18:09,023 --> 00:18:10,828
...Lived the truth.
317
00:18:10,878 --> 00:18:13,658
-So I cast myself.
-So...
318
00:18:15,287 --> 00:18:17,894
Couldn't see that one coming, could we?
319
00:18:20,696 --> 00:18:22,449
So remember, Xena...
320
00:18:22,467 --> 00:18:24,860
Faith is not a jump in the night...
321
00:18:24,861 --> 00:18:27,284
...but a walk in the light.
322
00:18:27,590 --> 00:18:31,407
Look, it's King Whatsis,
approaching on his...
323
00:18:33,185 --> 00:18:35,173
-...Horse!
-...horse!
324
00:18:35,303 --> 00:18:38,114
Hello, there, friends, Gabrielle and Xena.
325
00:18:38,164 --> 00:18:39,598
I seek your help.
326
00:18:39,755 --> 00:18:42,543
The warlord, Humungus,
is behaving in a destructive way.
327
00:18:42,544 --> 00:18:44,533
No doubt as a result
of his impoverished upbringing...
328
00:18:44,573 --> 00:18:46,959
...and other societal factors
beyond his control.
329
00:18:47,287 --> 00:18:48,817
Here he comes now!
330
00:18:50,133 --> 00:18:53,751
I am the warlord Humungus.
331
00:18:55,050 --> 00:18:57,746
Are you Xena?
332
00:18:58,334 --> 00:18:59,552
I am.
333
00:19:00,202 --> 00:19:02,802
Come, sit down.
334
00:19:03,403 --> 00:19:05,421
We wish to give you...
335
00:19:05,948 --> 00:19:08,561
...A message of peace.
336
00:19:08,656 --> 00:19:09,846
Ok.
337
00:19:16,728 --> 00:19:20,714
And... curtain!
Could that have gone better?
338
00:19:24,507 --> 00:19:25,819
Great work!
339
00:19:26,444 --> 00:19:29,234
Great drama.
Ok, let's keep going.
340
00:19:29,235 --> 00:19:30,235
Minya!
341
00:19:31,277 --> 00:19:34,374
-Come on, it's your big scene.
-Yeah.
342
00:19:35,381 --> 00:19:39,170
My big scene,
where I talk my issues out more...
343
00:19:40,226 --> 00:19:42,617
It seems like all we do
is talk.
344
00:19:42,706 --> 00:19:46,938
You know, maybe the play might be even
better if we just clobbered some skulls.
345
00:19:47,682 --> 00:19:51,285
No, Xena doesn't do that.
Her message is of peace.
346
00:19:52,330 --> 00:19:53,437
Yeah.
347
00:19:53,438 --> 00:19:56,252
Gabrielle, the play is great.
348
00:19:57,552 --> 00:19:59,741
Maybe if we just had a different title...
349
00:20:00,345 --> 00:20:02,554
Like what?
"Springtime for warlords"?
350
00:20:02,604 --> 00:20:05,396
Well, or...
"Blood, guts and babes".
351
00:20:06,171 --> 00:20:08,365
"Wild men in rubber".
352
00:20:10,284 --> 00:20:13,071
Or "Big boys in boxers".
353
00:20:13,081 --> 00:20:15,909
-That would be great!
-You're on the right track, you know?
354
00:20:15,959 --> 00:20:18,303
-"Chorus of showgirls"!
-Yeah!
355
00:20:19,707 --> 00:20:20,915
Stop it.
356
00:20:24,734 --> 00:20:26,746
Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!
357
00:20:26,996 --> 00:20:29,539
This is my play!
Now, I am in charge here...
358
00:20:29,589 --> 00:20:32,082
...and I say we can make
a few changes...
359
00:20:32,083 --> 00:20:34,502
...but we will not ruin
my vision.
360
00:20:41,572 --> 00:20:45,165
Well, well, well, well.
361
00:20:45,340 --> 00:20:48,350
Aren't you all ashamed of yourselves?
362
00:20:48,469 --> 00:20:52,071
Gabrielle put her heart and soul
into this play.
363
00:20:52,401 --> 00:20:54,806
And as a producer,
I'm ashamed for all of you.
364
00:20:57,983 --> 00:20:59,618
But as a producer...
365
00:20:59,779 --> 00:21:01,777
...I have a few little changes to make.
First...
366
00:21:06,371 --> 00:21:09,016
Zera, so good to see you.
367
00:21:09,189 --> 00:21:11,924
Therax, here wants to check
on his investment.
368
00:21:11,925 --> 00:21:14,408
Yeah, that's right.
And if I don't like what I see...
369
00:21:14,433 --> 00:21:17,986
...I'm grinding my profits
from the bones of your little playwright.
370
00:21:18,019 --> 00:21:20,031
Therax, sweetheart, don't worry.
371
00:21:20,041 --> 00:21:22,322
The show
is a guaranteed moneymaker.
372
00:21:22,332 --> 00:21:25,813
I can't say it enough.
This Gabrielle, she's an absolute genius.
373
00:21:26,835 --> 00:21:28,839
I have inner peace.
374
00:21:31,982 --> 00:21:34,189
I can work with amatours.
375
00:21:37,504 --> 00:21:40,103
In with love, out with hate.
376
00:21:40,355 --> 00:21:41,970
In with love.
377
00:21:42,180 --> 00:21:43,760
Out with hate.
378
00:21:50,228 --> 00:21:53,018
Well, I just gotta tell her that
that's just the way it's gotta be.
379
00:21:54,719 --> 00:21:55,846
Gabrielle...
380
00:21:56,050 --> 00:21:58,808
We were all talking and...
we just wanted to say that...
381
00:21:58,858 --> 00:22:00,240
...we're sorry.
382
00:22:00,810 --> 00:22:02,000
Thank you.
383
00:22:02,090 --> 00:22:04,854
And I want to apologize
for losing control.
384
00:22:04,900 --> 00:22:08,113
I promise,
it won't happen again. Ok?
385
00:22:08,491 --> 00:22:11,180
Well, let's start
where we left off. Scene 84.
386
00:22:11,230 --> 00:22:12,766
Ok, first positions.
Let's go.
387
00:22:14,689 --> 00:22:16,688
Pollena, when you're ready.
388
00:22:21,361 --> 00:22:23,560
Xena, is that you?
I have pr...
389
00:22:26,098 --> 00:22:28,717
-What happened to your costume?
-Ask my producer.
390
00:22:35,950 --> 00:22:38,278
I just figured... You know,
a little eye candy...
391
00:22:38,279 --> 00:22:40,074
What's the harm?
Doesn't affect the vision thing.
392
00:22:40,075 --> 00:22:42,464
It's... all still the same.
So, go on.
393
00:22:46,568 --> 00:22:49,821
Ok.
Let's move on to act 8.
394
00:22:50,782 --> 00:22:52,971
It'll be the entrance of Whatsis.
395
00:22:53,328 --> 00:22:54,794
I'll give the cue.
396
00:22:55,679 --> 00:22:58,670
Look, it's King Whatsis on his horse.
397
00:22:59,720 --> 00:23:03,502
Hello, Gabrielle and Xena.
I have battled the warlord Humungus.
398
00:23:03,530 --> 00:23:05,716
His army
destroyed my entire battalion.
399
00:23:05,717 --> 00:23:06,851
What's this?
400
00:23:06,901 --> 00:23:11,092
It's... It's blood.
You have a head on your stick.
401
00:23:12,525 --> 00:23:15,332
These are your changes?
Blood? Sex?
402
00:23:15,702 --> 00:23:17,097
And a hot tub.
403
00:23:17,098 --> 00:23:19,078
I got the guys
workin' on it in the back.
404
00:23:19,121 --> 00:23:22,585
I thought to myself...
"Joxer, what is it that you like?"
405
00:23:22,610 --> 00:23:25,027
And I figured,
that's what the public wants.
406
00:23:25,091 --> 00:23:27,399
Artists aren't supposed to care
what the public wants.
407
00:23:27,400 --> 00:23:29,057
We're not doing this for money.
408
00:23:29,062 --> 00:23:31,050
-I am.
-So am I!
409
00:23:31,060 --> 00:23:34,720
Look, if you don't like my message,
you can all take off.
410
00:23:37,423 --> 00:23:40,224
No good playwright
would have her art reduced to garbage...
411
00:23:40,225 --> 00:23:42,126
...for the sake of a few dinars!
412
00:23:58,819 --> 00:24:00,801
I wonder what Sophocles would say.
413
00:24:02,026 --> 00:24:03,615
Why don't I ask him?
414
00:24:05,058 --> 00:24:06,875
Artist to artist.
415
00:24:33,070 --> 00:24:35,863
I asked for blood!
You call that blood?
416
00:24:35,913 --> 00:24:39,272
-And shorten those skirts!
-Sophocles?
417
00:24:48,980 --> 00:24:51,980
-It's her play, and we're gonna apol...
-...Ok.
418
00:24:53,973 --> 00:24:56,432
Hi, Gabrielle.
Listen.
419
00:24:56,447 --> 00:24:59,488
We were talking and,
we just wanna tell you we think you're...
420
00:24:59,528 --> 00:25:01,439
I have an announcement to make.
421
00:25:02,234 --> 00:25:04,901
A message means nothing
if no one hears it.
422
00:25:07,322 --> 00:25:10,924
A flower in the forest is just a plant
if no one sees it.
423
00:25:14,654 --> 00:25:17,312
We're gonna need more blood.
I want more skin.
424
00:25:17,352 --> 00:25:19,246
I want action.
I want weapons.
425
00:25:19,272 --> 00:25:22,311
I want battlefields with beaten,
bloodied bodies.
426
00:25:22,361 --> 00:25:23,957
We're gonna take this little flower...
427
00:25:23,958 --> 00:25:26,557
...and we're gonna cram it down their
throats for their own good.
428
00:25:27,212 --> 00:25:30,941
-What about the critics?
-It'll kill 'em all.
429
00:25:35,397 --> 00:25:38,611
"Faster, chakram
kill, kill, kill."
430
00:25:39,498 --> 00:25:40,704
Boy.
431
00:25:46,483 --> 00:25:49,094
Kill 'em all!
Kill 'em all!
432
00:25:50,796 --> 00:25:54,005
You see? It's from the back of the throat.
It's much more guttural.
433
00:25:55,289 --> 00:25:58,406
I mean, we have to believe the anger,
the hatred for life.
434
00:25:58,793 --> 00:26:01,197
Ok?
Now make that audience shiver.
435
00:26:02,359 --> 00:26:05,568
Kill...!
Kill 'em all!
436
00:26:05,842 --> 00:26:09,052
Yeah, they'll shiver, all right.
With laughter.
437
00:26:10,819 --> 00:26:12,602
Like you could do better...
438
00:26:13,172 --> 00:26:15,571
-You bet I could.
-Well, you can't...
439
00:26:15,572 --> 00:26:17,372
...'cause I got the part.
440
00:26:20,527 --> 00:26:23,538
That's good.
Sell it to the back row!
441
00:26:23,650 --> 00:26:25,599
Gabrielle, dear.
442
00:26:25,609 --> 00:26:28,649
I see you've made some changes.
443
00:26:28,674 --> 00:26:30,865
I hope this won't get
in the way of your vision.
444
00:26:30,915 --> 00:26:34,669
No. The vision's fine. Look, we're gonna
need a bit more in the way of cash.
445
00:26:34,679 --> 00:26:38,623
More? But, darling, we were
very specific about the budget.
446
00:26:38,633 --> 00:26:41,260
-The investors...
-If the investors want a hit...
447
00:26:41,261 --> 00:26:43,869
...they can cough up the cash.
You tell them.
448
00:26:43,934 --> 00:26:46,936
And if they don't, I announce
bankruptcy and we close the doors...
449
00:26:46,937 --> 00:26:50,507
...but I am not going to take this bird out
until she can fly.
450
00:26:51,164 --> 00:26:54,291
-Well, I'll see what I can do.
-Good.
451
00:26:58,221 --> 00:27:00,835
Ok.
Can you lift her up? Lift her up.
452
00:27:01,180 --> 00:27:03,783
But, sweet of my tooth,
if she increases the budget...
453
00:27:03,784 --> 00:27:06,826
-...She reduces our profit. I know.
-We could just let her shut down.
454
00:27:06,836 --> 00:27:10,618
I mean, this travesty of a mockery of a play
comes to an end and we're home.
455
00:27:10,628 --> 00:27:12,237
And what, my little addlebrain?
456
00:27:12,238 --> 00:27:14,304
The investors would come at us,
the money people.
457
00:27:14,329 --> 00:27:16,740
No. No, no.
We have to come up with something...
458
00:27:16,750 --> 00:27:19,740
...before Gabrielle turns us
into a legitimate enterprise.
459
00:27:19,750 --> 00:27:21,531
We could ask the warlords
for more money.
460
00:27:21,532 --> 00:27:23,894
I'm already pushing the limit
on their percentages as it is.
461
00:27:23,919 --> 00:27:26,065
Well,
the warlord Cleon is in town.
462
00:27:26,066 --> 00:27:29,502
Cleon? Are you kidding?
Cleon fund a play about Xena?
463
00:27:29,555 --> 00:27:33,532
He hates Xena. She defeated him twice,
humilitated him in battle.
464
00:27:37,530 --> 00:27:39,983
But with
the right sales pitch...
465
00:27:40,640 --> 00:27:43,839
I get chills
when that delicious brain of yours clicks.
466
00:27:45,186 --> 00:27:46,481
May I kiss you?
467
00:27:46,521 --> 00:27:47,939
-Stop it.
-Sorry.
468
00:27:49,780 --> 00:27:52,610
Put the hot tub,
center stage.
469
00:27:52,660 --> 00:27:55,452
I want the audience to get an eyeful.
470
00:27:55,462 --> 00:27:58,150
Pollena, Pollena, no, no.
You need to grin wildly.
471
00:27:58,193 --> 00:28:00,402
Like you can't wait
to hack him into pieces...
472
00:28:00,403 --> 00:28:02,400
...before you chop his head off.
473
00:28:02,835 --> 00:28:05,763
"This is for you, Humungus,
you vile bastard!"
474
00:28:05,796 --> 00:28:06,985
Do you get it?
475
00:28:12,348 --> 00:28:16,516
What am I doing?
All this sex, blood, violence...
476
00:28:17,032 --> 00:28:18,616
Have I gone crazy?
477
00:28:19,018 --> 00:28:20,031
Gabrielle...
478
00:28:20,248 --> 00:28:22,639
We just sold out the first night!
479
00:28:23,284 --> 00:28:25,512
Crazy like a fox!
480
00:28:25,593 --> 00:28:28,993
I want more blood!
Let's make it gushing!
481
00:28:36,277 --> 00:28:39,479
How'd you get Gabrielle to spill
all of Xena's weaknesses?
482
00:28:39,489 --> 00:28:42,670
Simple. By having her write and direct
a play about her friend.
483
00:28:42,760 --> 00:28:46,150
-And she told everything, right, Milo?
-Everything.
484
00:28:46,240 --> 00:28:49,829
If anyone could get to Xena,
it would be that little friend of hers.
485
00:28:53,928 --> 00:28:55,941
-I'm in.
-Perfect!
486
00:29:08,857 --> 00:29:12,972
Listen now and you will hear
487
00:29:12,973 --> 00:29:17,274
The action-packed tale of Xena
488
00:29:17,275 --> 00:29:21,418
Xena, Xena
489
00:29:21,419 --> 00:29:25,160
Xena, Warrior Princess
490
00:29:33,507 --> 00:29:35,918
-I'm really wet!
-Me too!
491
00:29:40,264 --> 00:29:41,102
Xena!
492
00:29:41,103 --> 00:29:43,646
I've been searching for you
high and low!
493
00:29:43,696 --> 00:29:47,896
Please help rid my kingdom
of that scourge... Humungus.
494
00:29:49,315 --> 00:29:52,322
Xena, it's the warlord Humungus!
Help me!
495
00:30:06,912 --> 00:30:08,303
Inspirational...
496
00:30:17,733 --> 00:30:19,809
Please, say it again.
How much do we stand to make?
497
00:30:19,810 --> 00:30:21,810
What can I say?
A lot!
498
00:30:24,383 --> 00:30:25,783
I saw the play.
499
00:30:27,144 --> 00:30:29,216
I can explain.
You know what they say.
500
00:30:29,226 --> 00:30:31,246
A bad dress rehearsal...
Great opening night.
501
00:30:31,247 --> 00:30:33,442
-I loved it.
-You did?
502
00:30:33,467 --> 00:30:36,583
The power... The passion... The danger...
503
00:30:36,608 --> 00:30:39,270
The blood...
The kick-butt feel!
504
00:30:39,320 --> 00:30:41,510
This show is gonna run for years.
505
00:30:44,091 --> 00:30:46,889
He... actually liked it?
506
00:30:47,113 --> 00:30:49,498
-This is not good.
-If the play's a success, we're...
507
00:30:49,523 --> 00:30:51,907
Don't say the "Delta" word.
508
00:30:56,005 --> 00:30:57,808
The other warlord, Therax.
509
00:31:01,482 --> 00:31:02,885
What could have happened?
510
00:31:02,935 --> 00:31:05,592
That Joxer...
He was right on the money.
511
00:31:05,695 --> 00:31:07,976
We have to get Gabrielle
back to that boring,...
512
00:31:07,977 --> 00:31:10,566
...pretentious, heavy-handed material
we fell in love with.
513
00:31:10,567 --> 00:31:12,569
-Yes.
-Now, girls!
514
00:31:12,594 --> 00:31:15,276
Darlings! Congratulations!
515
00:31:15,301 --> 00:31:18,137
-Congratulations.
-Your play is already the talk of the town.
516
00:31:18,138 --> 00:31:22,215
I ran into one of the investors,
the warlor Kaelus, the Conqueror.
517
00:31:22,273 --> 00:31:25,881
He snuck into rehearsal
and what he saw just blew him away.
518
00:31:26,595 --> 00:31:29,411
I have never seen anyone
so galvanized as he was.
519
00:31:29,501 --> 00:31:30,500
Galvanized.
520
00:31:30,501 --> 00:31:33,103
He said he wanted his entire army
to see the play.
521
00:31:34,087 --> 00:31:36,669
How many in his army?
We got a matinee that hasn't sold out yet.
522
00:31:36,679 --> 00:31:39,198
Apparently, he's planning on invading
a neighboring country and, well...
523
00:31:39,208 --> 00:31:42,882
...your play is certain to fire up his army!
Goodbye, darlings!
524
00:31:42,907 --> 00:31:44,892
-Goodbye, darlings!
-See you opening night!
525
00:31:46,840 --> 00:31:49,235
-Oh, my gods.
-What?
526
00:31:49,966 --> 00:31:51,367
What have I done?
527
00:31:51,512 --> 00:31:54,211
Well, apparently,
you've created a great motivational play.
528
00:31:54,212 --> 00:31:55,595
For warlords.
529
00:31:55,769 --> 00:31:57,768
I sold out, Joxer.
530
00:31:57,769 --> 00:31:59,568
I can't believe it.
I sold out.
531
00:32:01,080 --> 00:32:03,510
Look, we are going back
to my original vision.
532
00:32:03,577 --> 00:32:05,711
I don't care
how much money we lose.
533
00:32:06,368 --> 00:32:10,178
It's going to be peace, love,
and changing the world.
534
00:32:28,742 --> 00:32:30,965
-"A message of peace".
-Yep.
535
00:32:31,232 --> 00:32:33,799
Great.
No pretensions, no ego.
536
00:32:33,824 --> 00:32:35,439
-Nope.
-Gotta hurry!
537
00:32:35,440 --> 00:32:37,621
-People should arrive soon.
-Right.
538
00:32:39,877 --> 00:32:42,762
A Joxer Production
539
00:33:02,100 --> 00:33:02,914
Gabrielle...
540
00:33:03,541 --> 00:33:05,646
Criticus, from Borias,
is in the audience right now.
541
00:33:05,656 --> 00:33:08,977
Don't worry. He's gonna love it.
Your vision's great.
542
00:33:09,267 --> 00:33:10,457
Thank you.
543
00:33:56,091 --> 00:33:58,490
Welcome
to the premiere performance...
544
00:33:58,612 --> 00:34:01,972
...of "Gabrielle and Xena...
A message of peace".
545
00:34:02,911 --> 00:34:06,639
If you're looking for titillation,
blood, violence,...
546
00:34:06,744 --> 00:34:08,766
...you've come to the wrong place.
547
00:34:10,395 --> 00:34:11,811
What's she up to?
548
00:34:11,836 --> 00:34:14,831
Behold the love, the peace...
549
00:34:15,072 --> 00:34:16,870
...and be changed.
550
00:34:24,542 --> 00:34:27,134
Xena, fearless, noble,...
551
00:34:27,144 --> 00:34:30,544
...a mighty princess
forged in the heat of battle.
552
00:34:30,594 --> 00:34:34,275
How many lives have been saved
by your warrior heart...
553
00:34:34,300 --> 00:34:36,609
...once you learned
to empty it?
554
00:34:45,407 --> 00:34:49,330
-Joxer, what's up, bubba?
-Danger, violence, blood.
555
00:34:49,370 --> 00:34:51,769
No, that was the good version.
556
00:34:54,650 --> 00:34:57,035
...that antisocial way!
557
00:34:57,045 --> 00:34:59,660
King Whatsis, take us to Humungus.
558
00:34:59,710 --> 00:35:01,126
We will bring him...
559
00:35:01,136 --> 00:35:03,582
-A message of peace.
-A message of peace.
560
00:35:07,541 --> 00:35:09,763
Joxer, we're in the middle
of a scene.
561
00:35:15,027 --> 00:35:16,232
Bad guy!
562
00:35:17,559 --> 00:35:19,601
No one takes my money
and gets away with it!
563
00:35:19,651 --> 00:35:22,141
-You're coming with me!
-Humungus... Cleon...
564
00:35:22,151 --> 00:35:23,731
That's right, Cleon.
565
00:35:24,061 --> 00:35:26,332
If I can't get the secrets
of defeating Xena...
566
00:35:26,333 --> 00:35:28,320
...at least I'll get her little friend.
567
00:35:32,568 --> 00:35:35,170
Go away.
You're not even a good actress.
568
00:35:35,740 --> 00:35:38,324
That was a little uncalled for.
569
00:35:42,615 --> 00:35:43,373
Xena?
570
00:35:44,791 --> 00:35:47,246
Xena?
571
00:35:47,247 --> 00:35:48,634
What are you doing here?
572
00:35:48,635 --> 00:35:51,133
Gabrielle, I knew there'd be trouble
when I saw the playbill.
573
00:35:51,158 --> 00:35:54,828
It listed Zera as the contact.
She's the queen of cons.
574
00:35:54,853 --> 00:35:56,371
The queen of cons?
575
00:35:56,381 --> 00:35:59,028
-What have you done to my play?
-Your play?
576
00:35:59,421 --> 00:36:01,018
I put up the money!
577
00:36:02,021 --> 00:36:04,360
Where's the blood?
The death?
578
00:36:04,361 --> 00:36:06,202
Where's all the fun?
579
00:36:06,819 --> 00:36:08,008
Get them!
580
00:36:09,266 --> 00:36:11,962
-Come on!
-No time to talk.
581
00:36:12,934 --> 00:36:14,330
It's time to act.
582
00:36:57,027 --> 00:36:58,666
Somebody stop them!
583
00:37:01,530 --> 00:37:04,126
Interactive theater!
Everybody join in!
584
00:37:25,135 --> 00:37:26,583
A centaur!
585
00:37:37,000 --> 00:37:39,188
Time to give the crowd
what they want!
586
00:37:39,506 --> 00:37:41,068
Hey, pee-wee.
587
00:38:00,802 --> 00:38:04,138
The play's not bad.
I just don't buy that Xena.
588
00:38:04,709 --> 00:38:08,311
There's the opening of "Buffus,
the bacchae-slayer" across the street.
589
00:39:18,115 --> 00:39:19,615
Here's your money.
590
00:39:19,616 --> 00:39:22,208
At least what Zera and Milo
didn't spend.
591
00:39:22,486 --> 00:39:23,912
You can keep it...
592
00:39:23,913 --> 00:39:26,955
...or, in the spirit of the play,
you could donate it to an orphanage.
593
00:39:27,488 --> 00:39:29,079
It's your call.
594
00:39:30,860 --> 00:39:32,060
Orphanage.
595
00:39:32,511 --> 00:39:33,895
Excellent choice.
596
00:39:35,166 --> 00:39:36,901
As for you, Zera...
597
00:39:36,900 --> 00:39:37,773
Xena...
598
00:39:37,774 --> 00:39:39,961
I've seen the error of my ways.
Starting now...
599
00:39:39,962 --> 00:39:41,977
...I'm gonna find a legitimate career
that best...
600
00:39:41,978 --> 00:39:43,605
...suits my natural abilities.
601
00:39:44,877 --> 00:39:46,067
Dustinus!
602
00:39:46,477 --> 00:39:49,478
I've been watching you and I am impressed,
darling.
603
00:39:49,568 --> 00:39:51,682
Have you ever considered
changing representation?
604
00:39:51,888 --> 00:39:53,710
I'm opening a new agency.
605
00:39:54,451 --> 00:39:55,651
Very well.
606
00:39:56,402 --> 00:39:59,446
But what I really want to do
is direct.
607
00:40:02,252 --> 00:40:04,443
It was stupid...
608
00:40:04,693 --> 00:40:08,109
...To think that people would want
to hear about peace and love...
609
00:40:08,825 --> 00:40:10,912
...instead of sex and violence.
610
00:40:11,656 --> 00:40:15,056
Well, peace might be boring,
but it's all anybody really wants.
611
00:40:15,057 --> 00:40:17,645
Yeah.
No one wants to be preached to.
612
00:40:17,790 --> 00:40:19,976
They have to experience things
for themselves.
613
00:40:19,978 --> 00:40:22,044
Still, if I could have touched
one person...
614
00:40:22,045 --> 00:40:25,884
Gabrielle! I wanted to thank you! I never
would have met Pollena if it wasn't for you!
615
00:40:25,885 --> 00:40:28,102
In fact, the two of you
made me realize something...
616
00:40:28,103 --> 00:40:31,005
...deep down about myself
that I guess I always knew...
617
00:40:31,006 --> 00:40:33,424
...but just didn't dare admit.
618
00:40:34,042 --> 00:40:37,698
Yes... I'm a thespian.
619
00:40:44,525 --> 00:40:45,722
Congratulations.
620
00:40:45,932 --> 00:40:48,334
You managed to touch someone.
621
00:40:49,174 --> 00:40:51,064
That's not exactly
what I had in mind.
622
00:40:51,114 --> 00:40:54,847
I wanted to change violent people
into people of peace, not actors.
623
00:40:54,897 --> 00:40:57,698
That is what she said, right?
Deep down she's a thespian...
624
00:40:57,708 --> 00:41:00,700
-Yeah, that's what she said.
-Why? What'd you think?
625
00:41:00,990 --> 00:41:04,220
Thespian...
Doesn't it look like...?
626
00:41:09,103 --> 00:41:10,522
Hello!
627
00:41:12,584 --> 00:41:13,984
You guys?
628
00:41:16,626 --> 00:41:18,025
Hey!
629
00:41:18,906 --> 00:41:20,901
I'm the producer!
630
00:41:22,369 --> 00:41:24,168
Anybody?
631
00:41:24,599 --> 00:41:26,213
Hello!
632
00:41:26,806 --> 00:41:29,018
I'm gonna tell my brother!
633
00:41:29,945 --> 00:41:31,333
Mommy!
634
00:41:31,620 --> 00:41:35,000
Subtitles: Marlon Rocha Lacerda
www.joxer.com.br
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
www.tvsubtitles.net
48502
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