All language subtitles for Gunsmoke.S15E18.Doctor.Herman.Schultz.M.D.720p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP2.0.H.264-DarkSaber_prob4_track3_[und]

♪

-"Gunsmoke," starring
James Arness as Matt Dillon...

-Morning, Festus.
-Matthew.

-I sure hope we're not gonna
be too busy for the next couple

of days.

-Onliest thing on my mind's
this here blanged tooth.

-What,
that's still bothering you?

-Oh.
-Why don't you go see Doc?

-Matthew, have you saw
that thingamajig

ol' Doc jobs down your goopher?

-Doesn't look to me
like you got much choice.

It's either that or live
with a toothache, you know?

-Well, I'm kind of afear'd
to ask ol' Doc again, Matthew.

Four times
he's had me in that chair,

and four times
I've squiggled out of it.

-Well, you think you
can get along with doin' things

here till Friday?
-Of course.

That ain't no problem.

-All right.

Well, I'm gonna be headin' up
to Garden City, you know.

They had a strange robbery
took place up there.

The safe and the freight office
were locked up tight,

and yet $3,000 wound up missing.

I'm going up there
and check on it.

You better get on over to Doc's
and have him fix that tooth.

-All right, Matthew.

Doc?

Maybe you and me could talk
about this here tooth again?

You --

Oh.
Sorry, I kind of mistook ya.

-[ German accent ]
It's all right.

-I'm just glad
it wasn't ol' Doc.

I know just what that old
scudder's gonna say

the minute I walk in there.

He'll say, "Well, I tried
to pull it three or four times,

and you wouldn't let me do it.

Now you can just go on,
scratch for yourself."

Well, I can hear that old scamp.

[ Mutters ]

-Hello.
-Yes, sir.

-I'd like to have a room,
please.

Second floor,
it looks on the street.

-Street side?

All full except one,

and that's reserved
for Mr. O'Leary.

-It's just -- Mr. O'Leary,

he would be unhappy
with another room?

-Very unhappy, sir.

He wired ahead.

He always likes
this particular room

whenever he comes into Dodge.

-I see.

I see.
Well, that's too bad.

-I do have a very nice room
facing the side.

Catches the night breezes.

That's an attractive watch, sir.

-Oh, thank you.
I'm glad that you appreciate.

-Quite unusual.

-Yes.

[ Hypnotic music plays ]

Like little stars
in the heaven...

they twinkle.

Twinkle.

Sleepy.

Sleepy.

Sleep.

Mr. O'Leary,
he will like this other room.

He has a sudden fondness
for night breezes.

You will not remember my words.

[ Snaps fingers ]

You said you had a nice room for
me facing the street, please?

-Yes, it was reserved
for Mr. O'Leary,

but I recall him saying
something about night breezes.

I'm sure
he'd much prefer the side.

-All right,
I thank you very much.

-Number four, sir, and I hope
you enjoy your stay in Dodge.

-Oh, I certainly will.

The people in Dodge
is most cooperative.

♪

♪

-Whoa, whoa.

Whoa, here.

-Doc, how ya doin'?
-Newly.

What in the thunder is that?

-It looks like a lot
of promisin' to me --

painless healing.

-"Only a small charge

made to those willing to partake
in new medical experiments."

Gettin' sick and tired of these
fakers arou-- where's Matt?

-Well, sir,
he left a while ago.

He's over in Garden City.

Uh, but Festus,
he's down in Long Branch.

-Well, have you seen
this miracle worker?

-I saw him headed
over to the Dodge House --

a little man,
carryin' a medical bag.

-I'll straighten him out.

-Doc can't blame me none
if my tooth quits hurtin'

every time he jabs
that whosiwhatsit in my mouth.

-Festus, you're just imagining
that Doc won't help you.

Now, when he gets back town,
you just up and ask him.

-I know better than that,
Miss Kitty.

He'll say I ain't got no more
sense than my mule's got

and that he ain't gonna mess
around with that tooth no more.

He'd twist and turn them words
and jabber away with everything

he can think of --
tryin' to hoorah me.

I know him.
-Here.

Try some of that,
see if it will help the tooth.

-Much obliged, Miss Kitty.

He'll start off with muttonhead.

He'll call me a muttonhead,
and then he'll build up to where

I ain't got enough brains
to fill up a thimble with,

and then he'll start
to insult me.

I can hear him.

-Fine thing.

Deputy Marshal here,
in the saloon,

this early in the morning,
drinkin' hard liquor.

-All right,
you ornery, old scudder.

Just never you mind to call me a
muttonhead and stuff like that.

-I haven't called
you anything yet.

-The way it appears to me,

a doctor is supposed
to be patient with his patients

expectin' him to have patience.

And you're just gonna wind up

to where you
ain't got no patients

if you don't start
to havin' some patience.

I'll tell you that.

-Can you translate that for me?

-I think he has a toothache.

-Well, for heaven sakes,
all you got to do

is go up into my office and wait
for me like you always do.

But you know as well
as I do that your toothache

will completely disappear
the very second

you hear my footsteps
on the stairs.

-Oh.
-Now, I want to talk to you

about something.

You're a deputy.

You got a badge.

Now, you know how Matt
and I feel about quacks

comin' into this town.

Well, right at this very minute,

one of them parked his rig down
at the livery stable,

and he's registered
over in the Dodge House.

Now, why do you allow a thing
like that?

Well, why do you?

-Well, maybe Dodge is gettin'
big enough for two quacks.

-You -- it's -- it's --

that -- you --
don't you get smart with me!

Here, you take that bag

and you get up to my office
and you wait for me.

-Where you goin'?
-None of your business.

I don't know
which tooth is bothering you

but I know one thing --

It certainly is not a --
a wisdom tooth.

-And so, this --
$650,

$1,500,

$2,875.

Total -- $8,625.

Dodge City is last.

If I could only
get $2,000 more --

[ Knock on door ]

It is?

-Doctor Adams.
I want to talk to you.

-I don't hear so good, please,
who is it?

-My name's Doctor Adams,
and I want to talk to you.

Now, open the door.

-I do not need a doctor
because I ama doctor.

-Well, that's exactly what
I want to talk to you about.

Now, open up.

-You may go away but -- but,
for heaven's sake, I'll open up.

What do you think?
That I am someone that you --

-I am the physici-- and...

-Galen?

Galen Adams?

-Herman?
-Yes!

-Herman Schultz!

-Oh, for heaven's sake.

-Well you old son of a gun.

-Galen Adams, here,
in Dodge City.

How -- how long?
30 years?

-Oh, Herman, 35.
Must be.

35 years, at least.

-But whatever the years,
a drink we must have, huh?

-You know.
-Oh, my, Galen.

-You had no idea,
seein' you, what you --

you're a sight for sore eyes.

-Yeah, but,
when was we last together?

-Well, I don't remember that,

but the last I recall
about you was, you were --

you were on your to Austria
to do medical research.

-I went, I went.
-You did?

-Mm-hmm.

-And here's the drink.
-Herman?

-Yeah?

-What I came up here about.
-Yeah?

-That buggy?
The painless healing?

-Oh, no.
No, no.

Well, the -- the --
the good town doctor

was coming up here to throw
the charlatan out of his town.

-Well, now, just a minute.

I am confident
that you would not be

involved in anything unethical.

But you have no idea
how many charlatans, as you say,

prey on these little,
western Kansas towns.

Now, you know
how I feel about that.

-Yes, I lecture,
and I give demonstrations.

-Well, then you
do promise painless healing.

-I lecture in little towns on
my way to a symposium in Denver.

But I leave behind me a word
of hope for those who would not

have the strength to be
at the pain of an operation.

-I don't think
I understand you.

-Mesmerizing, Galen.

Mesme-- have you heard
of this mesmerizing?

-Yes, of course, but, uh,

well, certainly
not applied to surgery.

-It is an entirely new field.

New, but,
it needs much research.

-Well, now, let me understand

You mean that you --
you can mesmerize a patient

so that he -- he won't feel
any pain under surgery?

-Unfortunately,
only 1 out of 20 respond.

But those few, they will not
feel pain under suggestion.

To be successfully used
in medicine, of course,

the science
of mesmerizing must be exact.

Oh, we can do little things,
you know, for most people.

Like, uh, having hotel clerk
give you a room

that was reserved
for somebody else.

-You worked it
on Howie downstairs?

-Yeah.

Well, you know,
keep in practice,

I have a little fun.

Yeah.

-Well...

I can certainly understand
how it could be a great --

great boon to medicine,
of course, if --

if you -- if...

You say you need a special type
of patient for this to work on?

-Uh, generally,

they are most unusual
in their thinking processes.

-I think I have
exactly the patient

that you need waiting for me
in my office right now.

-Oh, good.

-He's waiting up there
for me to pull a tooth for him.

Now, this fella is not
1 out of 20, as you say.

[ Chuckles ]
He's one in a million.

♪

[ Rattling ]

Howdy, Doc.

You know that toothache I had?

It -- it's just clean went away
all by its own self.

[ Chuckles nervously ]
Ain't that good?

It don't hardly hurt none
at all no more.

-Festus, I want you to meet
Doctor Schultz,

an old and dear friend of mine.

Doctor, this is,
uh, Festus Haggen.

-It is a pleasure.
-Mine, too.

Doc, I got a whole heap
of business to be tendin' to,

so I'll see you on --

-No, now, nonsense.

You just wait right there.

I've heard that song before.

You know as well as I do that
10 minutes after you leave here,

why, that tooth
will start raring on you again

and you'll start --
just -- just sit down.

-Well, the thing is, Doc,

I don't want to take up
your time 'cause

you got a whole mess
of sick folks

to be took care of.

-Festus, you are absolutely
my sole concern at the moment.

Now, you just sit
right down there

and talk to Doctor Schultz.

-Yeah, but --

-Mr. Festus, uh,
you are the Dodge lawman?

-Just the deputy, mister --
uh, Doctor.

I just wish ol' Doc
could get it through his head

that this here tooth of mine

ain't worth all the trouble
he's goin' to.

-I give you my word of honor,

you will not feel any pain
when your tooth is pulled.

-Oh, fiddle.
I ain't worried about no pain.

Us Haggens, we can stand
all kinds of pa--

What's that?

-Well, never mind what this is,
just lean back and open your --

-Well, wait.
-Here, just --

Now, just lean back
and open your mouth.

-Well, wait a minute.
-No. Yes.

I'm not gonna do anything.
I promise you.

-Ah.

Ah, ah.
-Now, hold -- hold still.

Hold on here.

Well, I'll declare.

This is absolutely incredible,
Herman.

-What, Galen?
-Galen?

-Oh, shut up,
and keep your mouth open.

Hmm.

Medical phenomenon.

Got 36 teeth.

Four more than a human being.

-Good subject, I think.

-Why don't we start?
-Yes.

Mr. Haggen,
please look at my watch.

-That's a right nice watch.

-Well, just look at it.
-I done saw it.

-Well, keep lookin'
at his watch.

He wants to sh--
-Mr. Haggen, look at my watch.

See how it swings to and fro?

Look at the little jewel lights.

They shine like stars.

Twinkle, twinkle.

Sleepy.

Sleepy.

Sleepy.

Sleep.

-[ Snores ]

Now, Mr. Haggen,

while your tooth is being
pulled, you will feel no pain.

You will be so happy,

you will even want
to pull it yourself.

No pain, just a tickle.

When I snap my fingers,
you will be awake.

[ Snaps fingers ]

-Absolutely amazing.

-He's ready.

-What was
that you was saying Doc?

-Well, Festus, I just said

that I was gonna pull
a tooth for you.

-Oh, good.

Right here.

Maybe I can help you Doc.

I can hold the pliers

and help you pull it.
-Thank you.

I think I'm gonna be able to
handle this all right on myself.

All right.
Now, just -- just hold still.

What's the matter?
-Tickle.

[ Laughs ]

-Just hold still.
I'll get it.

I am absolutely amazed.

-Yeah, Galen.

Perhaps, someday, the snap
of a doctor's fingers,

and a patient
will be able to endure any pain

necessary for any operation,
no matter how major.

-All right, now.

I'm just almost finished here.

Now, here's what I'm gonna --
just -- just right there.

All right, now, I want you
to just bite down on that.

Not now, I'll tell you --

When you...

All right, now, just slow there.

Just keep your jaws
tight on that,

and...you just sit there
and fester.

-[ Chuckles ]

-Herman, I never
thought I'd live to see that.

-Thank you.

-Well, I can certainly see
when you get this...

-Let me help you with this,
please.

-Tell me,
you want to have some fun.

-I always like to enjoy.

-You know,
he's a very good friend of mine.

-Oh, I saw that, yeah.

-Now, I wouldn't want
to miss this opportunity

for anything in the world.

Now, while you got him
like this,

is it possible for you to make
him think that he's a --

an animal, a chicken or...

-Could make him a chicken,
a duck, rooster, cow...

-Rooster!

-All right, very simple.

He doesn't even have
to be mesmerized.

-Oh, he doesn't?
-No, you see,

there's something we
don't understand yet at all --

that when we put someone

to sleep and tell them
to do something,

when they wake up, they do it.

Why?
We don't know yet.

-Wouldn't harm him?
-Oh, no, no, no, no.

-All right,
I'm goin' over to Long Branch

and may you give me a couple
of minutes

and you make him a rooster
and bring him over there.

-I'll see you.

-Oh.

Doc leave,
did he Doctor Schultz?

-Yes, he waits for us
at the Long Branch.

Festus, you can remove this.

-Oh, yes, sir.

-[ Snaps fingers ]

Festus, you and I are going
to become very good friends.

-Yes.
Good friends, Doctor Schultz.

-No, that's all right.

When we are alone,
you could call me Herman.

-Yes, Herman, I mean.

-Yeah, now,
listen to me very carefully.

My Dodge House room
faces the street.

It's a corner room.

Tonight, when you are walking
on the street,

I want you to keep your eye
on the window.

When the shade is pulled down,

you will come to my room without
saying one word to anybody.

Do you understand?

-You betcha, Herman.
-Good.

Now, we will go
to the Long Branch

and you will walk in
like a rooster --

a very big rooster
who feels like crowing.

You will crow five times.

Do you understand?

-Yes, sir, Doc --

Herman, I mean.

-[ Snaps fingers ]

-Shall we go, uh,
join Doc in the Long Branch?

-That's a real good idea, Her--
Doc -- Herman, I mean.

-No, no, no, it's all right.

We are friends.

-Real good friends, Herman.

[ Indistinct conversations ]

-[ Crows ]

[ Laughter ]

[ Crows ]

[ Cheers ]

-What's gotten into him?

-You'd have
to ask another chicken.

[ Laughter ]

-[ Crows ]

[ Laughter ]

[ Crows ]

[ Indistinct conversations ]

-[ Crows ]

[ Laughter ]

-Festus, what in heaven's name
has gotten into you?

-Well, Miss Kitty, there's --

there's times when a feller

just has to do
what he feels like doin'.

And I just kind of
felt like crowin'.

What's so bad about that?

-You're acting like a jackass.

-All right, quiet.

Quiet in here.

Please.
Please, folks, quiet.

Just -- just a -- just a minute,
if you please.

-Now,
what you have just seen, well,

it was a little joke, but it
does have its practical side,

and I'm gonna explain it to you.

Just a few minutes ago,
Festus was up in my office

and I pulled a tooth for him,

and he did not experience
one bit of pain.

Now, I'll tell you why.

It was because my friend,
Doctor Schultz, here,

through the power of suggestion,

was able to convince him that it
would be a pleasant experience

instead of a painful one.

Now that's the truth.
Now, its called mesmerization.

Now, I don't -- I don't profess
to understand this,

but as a doctor, I can't tell
you how excited it makes me.

And it just makes me so proud,
I, well -- let's --

I just want, now,

you to met my friend
Doctor Herman Schultz.

[ Applause ]

-Thank you very much,
but enough of me.

Uh, do me the honor and let
me buy you a drink, please.

[ Cheers and applause ]

-Look, you have here
a -- a music man.

Mister, would you please
make me a oom-pa-pa, oom-pa-pa?

[ Piano plays ]

[ Singing in German ]

-He crows better
than he dances.

-Doc, you ought to be
ashamed of yourself.

-Why?

-Planning that friend
of yours make a fool

out of Festus like this?

-I wouldn't have missed
this for anything in the world.

-You are incorrigible.

-Quit that!

I don't dance none with fellers.

Doc, I just
don't like that feller.

-Why not?

-Well, because for one thing,
he talks funny.

-Talks funny? He talks six
different languages.

-And he probably talks funny
in all of them, too.

-[ Vocalizing ]

[ Piano stops ]

[ Applause ]
-Well, I'll tell ya.

You still got it in ya.

-Thank you, Galen.
-Galen?

-Oh, uh, Doctor Schultz.

Miss Kitty Russell,
who owns the Long Branch.

-How do you do?

-How do you do?

What a beautiful necklace.

Befitting a beautiful lady.

-Well, thank you very much.

-Same old Herman.

-To your health, please,
Miss Russell, and to your place.

♪

[ Singing in German ]

-[ Knock on door ]

Come in.

Well, come in, Festus.

Come in, come in.
I'm glad to see you.

-Hi.

Didn't aim to bother you none,
Herman.

-[ Snaps fingers ]

-Now, you will come
and have a drink with me, yes?

-I don't reckon it'd hurt none.

-No, no.

Now, Festus, listen to me.

There is a special stage
coming through Dodge tomorrow.

-Oh.

You talking about the stage

that carries that money box
put up every week

at the freight office?
-Yes.

And we have to protect
that money box.

-Oh.

Of course, we always do.

-You always do what?

-Take good care
of the money box.

-But how?
We must be very careful.

Marshal Dillon has entrusted
you to be

sure that that money is safe,
and I'm here trying to help you.

-Oh, I know that, Herman.

-All right.

What time will that stage
come through Dodge?

-That there's a secret.

-You're getting very sleepy,
Festus.

Close your eyes.

Sleepy.

Sleepy.

Sleep.

-[ Snores ]

All right, now, everything

that I tell you do you will do
because your Marshal Dillon

will wish you to do it.

Do you understand?

-Yes.
-Good.

Very important we guard
that money box.

-Most importantest thing
there is.

-All right, what time does
that stage come through Dodge?

-That there's a secret.

-[ Speaks German ]

-Burke.
-Yes?

-He's onliest one
knows what time.

-Burke?

-Burke.

Feller works
at the freight office.

-How do you protect the gold?

-Well, there's no gold tonight,
sir, only the cash box.

-Yeah, of course, the cash box.

And you and I will protect it,
Mr. Burke.

-Yes, sir.
-What time does it arrive?

-At midnight.
-How do you protect it?

-The shotgun and the driver
make sure

that money's placed
into the safe.

Then I lock the safe.

-If, uh, if you lock the safe,
you could unlock it.

-When money is placed
into the safe,

it takes more than the key.

The combination lock is turned
and only Mr. Smithe can open it.

-Mr. Smithe?
Where is he?

-He'll be here
tomorrow morning, sir.

-Let me ask you --
supposing the money

is not put in the safe.
-Sir?

-Supposing
you are not around here

and the freight office
is closed.

There must be somewhere else
where the money is safe?

-Yes, sir -- the marshal
guards it for the night.

-The marshal?

In this case,
the deputy marshal?

-Yes, sir.
Festus Haggen.

-Yes, I see now.
-Sir?

-I'll tell you what.

The stage arrives at midnight,
and you will leave at 11:00.

-Yes, sir.
-You will close

the freight office,
and then go visiting.

Who -- who would be
someone that you would visit?

-My mother.
She likes for me to visit her.

-Where does she live?

-Across the street
from here, top floor.

-[ Speaks German ]
-Sir?

-Look, you -- you
will not go visiting tonight.

You will go riding.

You will ride out into the night
until you see the sunrise.

Then you may come home.

-Yes, sir.

-When I snap my fingers,

you will not remember
this conversation.

Oh, before I do.

Doctor Adams told me
he has a lady patient

by the name Anderhols,
Anderson -- something?

-Mrs. Anders.

-Yeah, thank you.

Now, before you leave at 11:00,
you will inform Doctor Adams

that Mr. Anders wants the doctor
to come to his farm.

It will be very urgent.
-Yes, sir.

Doc Adams to come to the Anders'
farm -- very urgent.

-[ Snaps fingers ]

Oh, yes, Doctor,
as I was saying,

the weddin' wagon
would be your best choice

if you want to save some money.

-Now, thank you very much,

but I'll come back
and tell you if I decide.

Good-bye.
-Good day, Doctor.

-Want some more?

-No thanks.

-Well, it ain't that I don't
hate the Doctor Schultz, Doc.

It's just, well, it's kind of...

I mean...

Well, you know what I mean.

-The day I know what you mean
the first time around

is the day I'll run the flag up
the pole.

-Doc, ain't you ever
got yourself a kind

of a flippery, wobbly feelin'
like you're, uh,

spillin' and slidin'
and you can't understand the way

ya feel, uh --
havin' that kind of a feeling?

-Those words ought to be carved
in granite.

-Why?
-Because 1,000 years from now,

nobody's gonna
believe you ever existed.

-Oh, there you go again.

Every day you got to start
off the same way,

and tryin' ruin everyth--
-Am I interrupting something?

-Of course not.

Certainly not.
-Would you believe it?

I've never walked
before in a jail.

-Well, now that's certainly not
a bad complaint to have, Herman.

You know, I was on my way

to breakfast, just now,
would you join me?

-No, thank you, Galen.
No.

-Galen?
-Shut up.

-I had already breakfast.

I thought, maybe,
I could visit with Festus.

He would show me the cells.
-Well, that's fine.

Just don't let him lock you
in one of them.

-Oh, he wouldn't do that.

-Well, don't be too sure.

He's already locked himself in,
twice that I know of.

-All right, you smart aleck,
old scamp.

This here's where we
keep all the outlaws at,

Doctor - uh, Herman.

I don't know why it is I keep,
callin' Herman, Herman.

I -- it's just kind of comes
natural to me, somehow.

-Oh, that's all right, Festus.

We're friends.
[ Snaps fingers ]

Festus, listen to me.

We have a problem.

The money stage arrives tonight,

but the freight office
will be closed.

So, we have to find a safe place
for that money.

-Safe place for the money.

-What is safer than a jail?

-Jail's a real safe place.

-You will tell the stage driver
to bring the money box here

and put it in a cell.

Then tell him the marshal
gave you those orders.

-Marshal give me the orders.

-Then I will come back,

and together,
we will guard the money.

-You and me guard the money
together.

-You're a good man, Festus.

[ Snaps fingers ]

-Uh, like I was sayin',
Herman, uh...

this here's the place where we
keep all the scallywags at.

-Now, Dodge City's a nice place.

No scallywags today.

Good morning, my friend, Festus.

♪

-Why in the Sam Hill
do I keep callin'

that old kook Herman for?

-Oh, Herman,
Dodge City's become home to me.

I could have settled
into any one of 100 towns,

I suppose, but --
-Doc, Mrs. Anders

wants you to come out
to her place right away.

-Well, what's the trouble?
-Well, I don't know.

I just ran into Mr. Anders
and he said

to have you come right on out.

it's very --
it's -- it's -- it's urgent.

-Well, now,
just hold on a minute here.

Just a minute.

I guess I better
get on out there, Herman.

Uh, wait a minute.

Burke,
you can do me a big favor.

If you'll go up
to my office, Mrs. Doniger --

-Doc, I can't do anybody
any favors tonight.

I got to --
-Well, now, wait a minute.

Why can't you?
-Well, I -- I got to go ridin'.

-Riding?
-Yeah, it's something

I got to do real bad.

It's a personal matter.

-There's another prime subject
for you.

Well, I'm gonna try to get back
tomorrow morning,

and if I do,
we'll have breakfast together.

-Nice, Galen.

-Oh, excuse me.
-I forgot, uh...

-Wow, it sure is a quiet night.

Sam, why don't take
an early break?

I can handle things.

-Well, thank you, Miss Kitty.

-Miss Russell.
-Well, good evening, Doctor.

-Could I treat you
to a night cap?

-I think it's time somebody
else bought you a drink.

-Well, thank you.

Thank you very much.

My, excuse me.

I was looking
at your beautiful necklace.

I'm attracted
to such exquisite jewelry.

May I examine it, please?

-Of course.

-Oh, thank you so much.

Oh, it is exquisite.

Look at the lights,
how they shine.

They twinkle
like little stars --

little stars that shine

and bring the warmth
of a caress,

a caress that makes for sleep.

Sleepy.

Sleepy.

Sleep.

Miss Russell.

I wish to buy this necklace.

Name a moderate price.

-What ever gave you the idea
I wanted to sell it,

Doctor Schultz?

-You are, uh,
not only a most beautiful woman,

but with excellent tastes.

What a most
extraordinary person.

-Well, thank you very much.

-Good night, Miss Russell.

-Good night, Doctor Schultz.

♪

-Hold up, now.
-Hyah.

-There's a change
of plans, Stoney.

-With the freight office done
locked up and Burke out of town,

I want you to bring
your money box to the jail.

-In the jail?
-Yeah, for safe keepin'.

I'm gonna lock it up.

So just come on down yonder,

and I'll lock her
up good and tight.

-If you say so, Festus.
-Hyah!

♪

-Just tell me this,
is the money box here?

-Oh, course, it's right there

where you said
we ought to put it.

Right here,
where nobody can get at it, see?

-But, Festus, tell me this.

Are you sure that it is safe
in there?

-Fact is, I was just thinkin'
about that when you come in,

Herman --
about the money not being safe

-And I got me a idea
'cause I don't think

that money box
ought to be there in the cell,

where some yahoo maybe
get his hands on these here keys

and open up the cell door,
don't you see?

-That's very good thinking.

A key could open up the door.

So, I have my buggy outside,

that is the last place
anybody would think to look.

-So, I figured out somethin'
that's gonna make you so proud.

We'll just fix her where nobody
ain't gonna get their hands

on these here keys.

Now, we can both go ourselves
a good night's sleep

and not worry about nobody
openin' up this here cell door.

And I'll fix us a pot
of fresh coffee.

And maybe you could tell me
all about the olden days.

You know, when you and Doc
was in school and --

-[ Shouts in German ]
-When you used to do

all that knifin' and hangin'
and stuff

and when you and Doc was...
-There must be other keys.

-...back yonder
in the schoolhouse

And all that schoolings
you's going --

-Festus, never mind that.
Never mind that.

Where is the duplicate keys
what will open that cell door?

-Oh, them there's the only keys
we got.

See, I was figurin'
on gettin' Newly.

He's our gunsmith here in town.

And he is the handiest feller

you have ever saw workin'
with little tools.

-But could you get
him here tonight?

-Oh, no, he ain't gonna back
till tomorrow.

But I'll get
him to open it up then.

And you know one thing?

Matthew, he's the marshal here,

he's gonna be shakin' your hand
for pitchin' in

and helpin' me to protect
that there money box.

-Festus!

There must be another way
to open that cell door.

-Herman, I'll guarantee
you there ain't no way

nobody can get that money box.

It's ol' Doc
gettin' back in town.

I tell ya somethin' --
he's gonna be mighty proud

of you too, Herman,
for helpin' us out with...

I'll get a new pot of coffee

made for when you fellers
get back!

-Kitty, have you seen Burke?

-No, I haven't.

You look mighty put out.

-Well, I am upset.

He sent me
on a wild goose chase.

If I hadn't have run
into Bill Anders,

I'd have gone all the way
out to his --

Well, that's Herman's rig.

-Sure seems to be leavin' town
in a hurry.

-He never said a thing to me.

That's kind of strange.

-You know, um, speaking
of things that are strange,

I -- I have a feeling that,
um, he was tryin'

to do that mesmerizing thing
to me tonight.

-What?
-Well, you know,

this -- this necklace
he was so crazy about.

He was tryin' to talk me
into sellin' it to him.

But he was talkin' funny-like.

-I better see what Festus
knows about this.

-Doc?

Was that Herman's buggy leavin'
town?

-Yeah, it was.

And I just can't --

Herman, you say?

-Yeah, well, that there's kind
of a funny thing.

You know how a feller will start
to callin' another feller

by his first name.

'Course, I ain't never aimed
to be disreceptacle.

-Hold on a minute here.

Festus, look me
right in the eye.

I want to ask you a question.

Do you like Herman Schultz?

-Of course I do.

-Have you always
liked Herman Schultz?

-Ain't no reason
why not to, Doc.

You want to see
what me and Herman done?

-I think I do.
-Oh, we've been --

we've been protectin' the --
the money box here.

Got her locked up in the cell.

Of course,
throwin' the keys in there,

now that there was my idea.

But I don't think
Herman liked that too good.

-Why not?

-Because he had a safer place
for it.

-Where?

-Well, he said
it'd be safer in his buggy.

You know I feel kind of bad
about that, Doc,

'cause it appeared like he
got a little bit upset with me.

Where you goin', Doc?

-I'll upset him.

-[ Yawns ]

One man in a million.

Where could you find
such a empty head?

[ Yawns ]

Who would think to throw a key
in a cell?

Nobody.

♪

[ Shouts in German ]

[ Whips cracks ]

Hyah!

♪

[ Shouts in German ]

♪

Hyah!

Faster!

♪

-Hold up!
-Go away!

-Are you gonna stop or not?

-No!

Hyah!

-Hold on, there.

-Hyah!

-Hyah!

-No!

Get away!

Get away from me, Galen

-I'll Galen you.
-Stop it!

♪

Look what you're doing.

-Pull over, you charlatan.

-Will you stop with the swats?

♪

We will both get hurt.

♪

-[ Grunts ]

-Galen, no, no, no.

You was lucky
that you didn't hurt me?

-You're gonna be hurt!

-No, no, no.

Galen, it is --

it is not dignified.

Doctors do not fight.

-You are no --
you're no doctor.

You're a crook.
-Galen, you forget one thing.

When we was in college, who --
when we had a fight, who won?

-I'll never forget it.

-Oh.

Galen.

Galen, please.
Listen to me.

We are getting a little too old
for this foolishness.

Please, can we
settle it another way.

-I'll tell you
how we'll settle it.

You're goin' back into Dodge
with me,

and you'll take Festus
out of that --

that state you left him in.

-I thought the state I left him
in was -- was an improvement.

-I liked him that way!

-Galen, lis-- listen.

I'll give you the money.

I'll give all the -- the money.

-What money?

-I'll give you
all -- all the money.

This,
what I took from Garden City,

from Wichita,

and from Three Forks.

$8,000.

Not for me -- for research.

If I had gotten lucky
in Dodge city,

I would have had a beginning.

-I don't know anything
about that.

Herman, I know this --

You are comin' into Dodge
with me right now

or I'm gonna break every bone
in your carcass.

-All right.

I'll go with you.

And when I snap my fingers,
you will be yourself again.

One, two, three.

[ Snaps fingers ]

-Doc?

Matthew?
-Festus.

-Festus, Doctor Herman Schultz,
you know.

-I met Doctor Schultz.

-Well, his first name's Herman,
you know.

-I know that.

I just call my friends
by their first name.

-I'm satisfied, Matt.
He's all right.

-Well, it's good enough for me.

-I suppose now I
have to be locked up?

-I'm afraid so, Doctor.

-Let me do it, Matthew.

-You know,
maybe it wouldn't be so bad.

We could find a judge who's sick

and will appreciate
some medical research, Galen.

-Galen?

-Herman...

I wish you the best
of everything.

I mean it.
-Thank you.

-From now on,

just use that watch the way
it was intended, will you?

-Mr. Festus.

-Thank you.
-Much obliged, Sam.

-You're welcome.

-I'll just have
some coffee, Sam.

-Yes, ma'am.
-Thank you.

-Matthew?
-Hello, Matt.

-Good evening.
-Matt, any news yet?

-No, not yet, Doc.

Judge Brooker's still
got the case under advisement.

But, you know, the fact
that, uh, of Doc Schultz' age

and his -- well, the fact that
he returned the money and all,

I don't think they're gonna
be too tough on him.

-Yeah, well, I certainly
hope not because, well,

no matter how Herman turned out,

he -- he still is a fine,
fine, medical man.

Now, there is somethin'
I want to say here.

-Thank you.
-I owe everybody

here an apology,

and I guess a lot
of other folks, too.

I really do.
-Oh, Doc.

It's not your fault.

You meet an old friend
and you take him for

what you knew him to be.

-No, I do, Kitty.

I -- I -- I owe that apology.

Well, I owe -- I owe you
an apology, Festus, most of all.

-Oh, fiddles, Doc.

-I do.
I do.

Because you, right
from the start, instinctively

knew that there was
somethin' wrong with Herman,

and -- and, well,
that's more than I knew.

You were smarter than I was
about it.

-Well, if you're gonna be
pattin' folks on the back,

I'll tell you now -- the way
that you whomped that old coot

and brung him back to Dodge,

maybe you'd ought to
be the Dodge deputy.

Don't you think so, Matthew?

-Well, uh, yeah, but then
what would you do for a livin'?

-Well, maybe I could kind of do
the town doctorin'.

'Course, you'd have to tell me
a couple of doctorin' things.

-Oh, I could fill you
in on that in a couple hours.

-There's one thing
that's fuddlin' me

somethin' terrible, Doc.

-What?

-Well, now, when a Doctor
doctors another doctor...

-Yeah?

-...well, does the doctor that's
doin' the doctorin'

doctor the doctor
that's gettin' doctored

the way that the doctor
that's doin' the doctorin'

wants to doctor the doctor
that's gettin' doctored?

Or does the doctor
that's gettin' doctored

tell the doctor
that's doin' the doctorin'

to doctor the doctor
that's gettin' doctored the way

that the doctor
that's gettin' doctored...

♪

♪

-Stay tuned for scenes
from next week's "Gunsmoke."

♪