Original subtitles

[ Man ] One, two! One, two, three!

I've never seen a supernova blow up.

But if it's anything like my old Chevy Nova,

it'll light up the night sky.Yeah!

Anyone who misses this will regret it the rest of his life.

Hey, Fry, could you go make some popcorn?Okay.

Let's go, microwave. I'm in a hurry here. Hmm?

[ Chuckles ]

[ Electrical Crackling ]

Hey. [ Sniffing ] What smells like blue?

- Fry, get up here! It's starting! - Focus!

[ All Gasping ]

[ All Exclaiming ]

Hey, which crazy thing happening are you guys screaming about?

[ All Gasping ]

[ Clocks Chiming ]

[ All Groaning ]

[ Microwave Timer Dings ]Ooh! My popcorn's done.

Aw. It's less popped than ever.

I don't know what happened, but we've taken on a lot of clocks.

Let's get back home.[ Ticking ]

Why is there so little traffic around Earth?

And what's this layer of ozone?

That's never been there before.

[ Alarm Sounding ]Hmm?

Such noises!Oh, no!

There's no global positioning signal. Navigation is failing!

- We're gonna crash! - Not if I can help it.

[ Engines Powering Down ]Oh. I guess I can't.

Everyone, put on your seat belts.[ Moaning ]

Ah, those things cost more lives than they save.

[ Yelling ]

[ Crash ]

Bender, are you okay?I don't know. I'll try to move my feet.

[ Straining ]

All right, here's the plan.

Zoidberg, pick up the pieces. Everyone else, take five.

[ Howling ]

And Zoidberg picks up another piece!

The crowd goes wild!

[ Mimics Crowd Cheering ] [ Vehicles Approaching ]

What is?

General, in all my years of coverin' top secret discoveries with sheets,

I've never dramatically revealed anything as shocking as this.

♪♪ [ Mimics Fanfare ]

The debris from an alien spaceship.

Son, I think I can safely say-- [ Screams ]

As you can see, 1947 is going to be...

an eventful year for the town of...

Roswell, New Mexico.

[ Beeping, Whirring ]

[ Farnsworth ] Remarkable!

According to the high-precision digital chronograph...

it's July 9, 1947,

which would explain why the chronograph has turned into...

this pinup calendar. [ Bender ] Wait a second.

You mean we traveled through time?

Doy! Some idiot must have put metal in the microwave.

Yo.And the microwave radiation...

combined with the gravitons and graviolis from the supernova,

blasted us through time itself.

Have you seen today's news?

"High School Gym Renovations On Schedule"?

What a load!No. Over here.

"Flying Saucer Captured."

That's no flying saucer.

That's my ass! [ Fry ] My God!

This means the flying saucer that crashed in Roswell... was us!

And the alien they captured was-- was--

- Hello. - Ewww!

So what are you guys doing tonight? I'm up for whatever.

Yes. We tore the universe a new space-hole all right, but it's clenching shut fast.

Our only hope to get back to our own time...

is to go back through it within, oh, say...

exactly 24 hours.

No problem.

The ship's fixed except for the cup holder,

and I should have that operational within 10 hours.

You've got eight. But a more urgent concern is the microwave.

Without a working one, we have no hope of returning to the future.

Well, I'm sure we can buy a microwave somewhere around here.

Meanwhile, you guys sneak onto the army base and rescue Bender's body.

Hey, and while we're on the base, I'll visit my Grandfather Enos.

He was stationed at Roswell.Your grandfather?

Stay away from him, you dimwitted monkey!

You mustn't interfere with the past.

Don't do anything that affects anything...

unless it turns out you were supposed to do it,

in which case, for the love of God, don't not do it!

- Got it. - If, for example, you were to kill your grandfather,

you'd cease to exist.

[ Gasps ] But existing is basically all I do!

[ Snoring ]

What is your purpose here?Huh?

All right, Officer. I'll move along.

What the general means is why did you come to Earth?

Not a day goes by I don't ask myself the same question.

[ Man ] Enos![ Gasps ]

Private, I want that toilet bowl so clean, I could eat off it!

'Cause I intend to!Well, gadzooks, Sarge.

[ Fry ] It's him! It's my Grandfather Enos!

Now prepare my lunch and place it in the latrine at 1200 hours!

[ Gasps ] That jeep's gonna hit him, and I won't exist anymore!

[ Screams ]

[ Enos ] Hey!

Are you crazy? You almost got yourself run over.

I did? Then I sure am lucky you knocked me...

onto this pile of rusty bayonets.

Psst! Fry, stop interfering with history!

I don't want to have to memorize a lot of new kings when I get back.

I had no choice. I was about to not exist.

I could feel myself fading away, like Greg Kinnear.

Well, thanks, soldier. I'm off to make Sarge's lunch.

Handlin' raw chicken? Best part of the job.

Mmm! Finger-lickin' good.

That's it! This place is too dangerous. We gotta get you out of here.

Everything's gonna be all right, Dad.

Well, gadzooks! I'd better ask Sarge.

No time! Run! Run to safety!

[ Both Panting ] [ Bomb Whistling ]

[ Both Screaming ]

[ Computers Beeping ]

This experiment will determine what food, if any,

the alien eats.

A buffet! Oh, if only I had my wallet with me.

Um, it's free.

[ Zoidberg Screams ]

[ Loud Eating Noises ]

Get me the president.

[ Jewelry Rattling ]

Fry's from around this time. I'll talk like him.

Yo, homes! We're looking for a microwave oven.

Microwave? Never heard of that brand, sweetheart.

What you want is the deluxe gas princess.

This beauty has four broilers, a casserole indicator,

a fold-out ironing board, and down here a foot-soaking tub...

since, as a woman, you'll be standing in front of it all day.

[ Yells ]

Oh. I'm sorry.

Now, I'll "ax" you again. Where can we find a microwave?

Sir, your wife's hysterical, so I'll address this to you.

This oven is lightning fast. It takes only five hours to cook a roast.

Ooh! That's good news.

You know, you really don't cook enough roasts, Leela.

Ohh. Women!

Oh! Thank God I got you off that dangerous army base.

You sure are the helpful type, stranger.

Say, you got anything to eat in that there lunch box?

What-- [ Muttering ]Ooh. Snacks.

Hey, that's my brain! [ Muttering, Indistinct ]

Man. Them crackers cut my mouth up somethin' bad.

Let's stop off for a malt.

[ Door Chime Jingles ]

See that waitress there?Yowzah! I know what I want for dessert.

That's my fiancée, Mildred.

Grandma Mildred? Uh, no dessert. Just coffee.

Okeydoke. And for you, snuggums?

Uh, I'll have a pie with a fried egg on top.

Yeah, she sure is pretty. You ought to marry her and father some children right away.

Yeah, folks say that. But did you ever get the feeling...

you're only goin' with girls 'cause you're supposed to?

What?

Don't ever, ever say or think that again!

Please, just concentrate on staying alive.

[ Gasps ] Fire! Look out!

[ Gasps ] You almost got neutered.

Well, 'taint as bad as gettin' killed.

For me it is! I'm getting you out of here.

Ow![ Sighs ]

Okay, we're in the middle of nowhere, which is the safest part of nowhere.

Just stay put and enjoy this calendar.

Safe and sound. Finally, I can continue to exist.

Three, two, one.

[ Gasping ]

And you are outta here!

What'll you folks have today?I'll have the soylent green...

with a slice of soylent orange and some soylent coleslaw.

- Pardon? - It's the 20th century, Professor.

Oh, right. I'll have a croque monsieur,

the paella, two mutton pills and a stein of mead.

I'll just have a small injection of Fem-a-slim.

Uh, two chili dogs comin' up.

Well, settle in. Without a microwave, we're trapped in this time period.

Oh, Lord!

We'll have to endure the horrible music of the Big Bopper,

and then the terrible tragedy of his death.

Wait a second! There's a microwave radar dish at the army base.

- We could steal it. - No! That would alter history.

Above all else, it is our sacred duty to preserve the past exactly as it was.

Well, I killed my grandfather.Wha--

Wait. If you killed your grandfather, why do you still exist?

I don't know. Maybe God loves me.

[ Hysterical Laughter ] Oh!

Killed? In an atomic blast?

No, sir. I'm afraid I don't take much solace in the fact...

that the implosion trigger functioned perfectly.

[ Sobbing ]Ah.

There, there. If it makes you feel any better, his body was vaporized,

so there's no chance of him coming back as a zombie.

I'm not worried about that.Then you're a braver woman than I.

You remind me of Enos. Would you mind walking me home?

How far is it?

Welcome to Roswell, President Truman.

Fellas, this visit's top secret. No one's to know about it...

except the senior officers, scientists,

and a single conspiracy nut who no one will believe.[ Maniacal Laughter ]

Mr. President, our experts have reassembled the parts...

from the alien ship into its original design.

Hmm. [ Gasps ]

Whistlin' Dixie! I want this sent to Area 51 for study.

But, sir, that's where we're building the fake moon landing set.

Then we'll have to really land on the moon.

Invent NASA and tell them to get off their fannies!

If you come in peace, surrender or be destroyed.

If you're here to make war, we surrender.

Both good. The important thing is I'm meeting new people.

Bushwah! Now, what's your mission?

Are you planning to make some kind of alien-human hybrid?

Are you coming on to me?Hot crackers! I take exception to that!

I'm not hearing a "no."

Nerts to this space crab! If we want information,

we'll have to do us an old-fashioned alien autopsy.

Hooray!

Every little thing reminds me of Enos.

[ Sobbing ]

Aw. I know how you feel.

My grandfather died recently.

It's all so sad.

At times like this, I just need someone to hold me.

Mmm. You like holdin' me, don't you?

Hey, you know what always cheers you up?

Baking me a nice tray of sugar cookies.

How about these cookies, sugar?

[ Gasps ] I shouldn't be here. [ Glass Shatters ]

I shouldn't even exist. But I do exist,

which proves you can't really be my grandm--

Mmm!

[ Both Moaning ]

[ Snoring ]

[ Farnsworth, Leela Groaning ]Oh, my God!

Huh?

What the hell have you done, Fry?Relax.

She can't be my grandmother. I figured it all out.

Of course she's your grandmother, you perverted dope!

- Look! - Come back to bed, dearie.

[ Screams ] It's impossible!

I mean, if she's my grandmother, who's my grandfather?

Isn't it obvious?

- You are. - [ Screams ]

[ Screaming Continues ]

Did you say something, dearie? I'm a bit hard of hearing.

[ Screaming Intensifies ]

Commencing excavation of the subject's chest cavity.

And in this corner, Zoidberg!

[ Chuckling ] Come on, lighten up.

What is this, a funeral?

Heart.Take. I've got four of them.

Stomach contents: one deviled egg.

Deviled egg? [ Loud Slurping ]

The same deviled egg.

[ Sobbing ]

Snap out of it!Start the ship, Leela.

Let's just steal the damn radar dish and get back to our own time.

But-But won't that change history?

Oh, a lesson in not changing history...

from Mr. "I'm My Own Grandpa."

Let's get the hell out of here already! Screw history!

[ Screaming ]

U.F.O.! U.F.O.!

[ Ticking ]

Hey, don't cut that. I need that to speak.

[ Crash ][ Gasps ]

Oh, my--Great Roosevelt's ghost!

[ Karate Grunts ]

[ Grunts Continue ][ Groans ]

Take this, Mr. President, sir! [ Gasps ]

[ Gasps, Groans ]

The president is gagging on my gas bladder.

What an honor.

[ Snoring ] Wha--

Oh, right.

Enos! [ Fry ] He's dead! Sorry!

[ All Cheering ]

Choke on that, causality!

1947 can kiss my shiny metal-- [ Yelling ]

Turn around! We've gotta go back for Bender!

Impossible! The supernova time hole is closing.

If we don't leave now, we'll never get back to the 31st century.

Whoa!

[ Fry ] Bender!

There. Good as new.

- Don't you need this one? - Oh, no!

That's my-- [ Gagging ]

Gotcha.

Oh. Poor Bender.

He must be so lonely right now,

trapped a thousand years in the past.

Hey, wait a second!

[ Beeping ]

Anything?No.

[ Beeping Intensifies ]Wait!

[ Bender ] Ow! Stupid jerk!

He's alive!Whee!

Bender! What was it like lying in that hole for a thousand years?

I was enjoying it until you guys showed up.

Well, now everything is back as it was.

And if history doesn't care that our degenerate friend Fry is his own grandfather,

then who are we to judge?

Amen!