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1
00:00:09,009 --> 00:00:11,315
- I love movies so much,
2
00:00:11,446 --> 00:00:13,230
but some movies are
more than movies.
3
00:00:13,361 --> 00:00:14,362
You know,
they become a part of you.
4
00:00:14,492 --> 00:00:18,148
And for me,
that's "Forrest Gump."
5
00:00:18,279 --> 00:00:19,410
I mean, I think
if I could be anybody,
6
00:00:19,541 --> 00:00:20,542
I'd want to be Forrest.
7
00:00:20,672 --> 00:00:21,499
I just love the guy.
8
00:00:21,630 --> 00:00:23,023
He's pure.
9
00:00:23,153 --> 00:00:25,329
He's funny.
He's thoughtful.
10
00:00:25,460 --> 00:00:26,504
He's historically important.
11
00:00:28,202 --> 00:00:30,334
And, I mean, his relationship
with his mother,
12
00:00:30,465 --> 00:00:33,946
that scene at her bedside
when he's like,
13
00:00:34,077 --> 00:00:36,166
"Mama, what's my destiny?"
14
00:00:37,776 --> 00:00:39,865
- And she says, "Forrest,
15
00:00:39,996 --> 00:00:41,389
you got to find that out
for yourself."
16
00:00:41,519 --> 00:00:42,912
It--
17
00:00:43,043 --> 00:00:44,479
It just kills me, you know.
18
00:00:47,569 --> 00:00:50,224
Excuse me.
19
00:01:03,063 --> 00:01:05,456
Sorry about that.
20
00:01:05,587 --> 00:01:06,979
What was I saying?
21
00:01:10,026 --> 00:01:16,946
#
22
00:01:50,501 --> 00:01:52,112
Oh, hello.
23
00:03:17,371 --> 00:03:19,677
Gotcha.
24
00:03:19,808 --> 00:03:21,549
You got to see your face.
Give me that.
25
00:03:21,679 --> 00:03:22,898
Give me that.
26
00:03:23,028 --> 00:03:25,074
- Mom!
27
00:03:25,204 --> 00:03:27,381
- Wolfie.
- Stop.
28
00:03:27,511 --> 00:03:29,121
- Oh.
- Cut it out!
29
00:03:29,252 --> 00:03:30,775
- Get inside.
30
00:03:43,440 --> 00:03:45,660
Open sesame.
31
00:03:56,888 --> 00:03:58,499
Mayday! Mayday!
32
00:03:58,629 --> 00:04:00,414
Pilot to tower, we have
an emergency landing--
33
00:04:00,544 --> 00:04:01,589
- It's not an airplane, Mom.
- Coming in.
34
00:04:01,719 --> 00:04:02,807
- No, there's not an airplane.
35
00:04:02,938 --> 00:04:03,939
No, there's not.
36
00:04:04,069 --> 00:04:05,375
- What is up with you?
37
00:04:05,506 --> 00:04:06,724
Why are you so grumpy?
- I'm not grumpy.
38
00:04:06,855 --> 00:04:09,727
I don't like you filming me.
Give me my camera.
39
00:04:09,858 --> 00:04:11,947
- I have been filming you since
you were pooping your pants.
40
00:04:12,077 --> 00:04:12,730
This is not your camera.
41
00:04:12,861 --> 00:04:14,602
It is my camera.
42
00:04:14,732 --> 00:04:15,907
- It is basically my camera
at this point.
43
00:04:16,038 --> 00:04:18,345
- I lent it to you.
44
00:04:21,130 --> 00:04:22,827
What is the matter
with you now?
45
00:04:22,957 --> 00:04:24,089
Why are you so grumpy?
46
00:04:24,220 --> 00:04:26,091
- I am not grumpy, Mom.
47
00:04:26,222 --> 00:04:27,963
I can become grumpy
if you would like
48
00:04:28,093 --> 00:04:31,532
to keep calling me grumpy.
49
00:04:31,662 --> 00:04:36,798
Well,
did have a surprise for you.
50
00:04:36,928 --> 00:04:39,582
- No, no, we're not doing that.
51
00:04:39,714 --> 00:04:40,715
No.
52
00:04:45,328 --> 00:04:47,199
What?
53
00:04:47,330 --> 00:04:51,029
- I--I may have
to take it back.
54
00:04:51,159 --> 00:04:52,727
- What?
55
00:04:55,338 --> 00:04:56,774
- No peeking.
56
00:04:56,905 --> 00:04:57,993
- Not peeking.
57
00:04:58,123 --> 00:04:59,821
- Stop there.
58
00:04:59,951 --> 00:05:01,562
Surprise.
59
00:05:05,566 --> 00:05:08,177
Oh, Mom, this is nice.
60
00:05:08,308 --> 00:05:10,832
- This is my stuff.
61
00:05:10,962 --> 00:05:13,400
Oh, my posters.
62
00:05:13,530 --> 00:05:14,662
- Hit play.
63
00:05:21,103 --> 00:05:22,582
I love this song.
64
00:05:22,713 --> 00:05:24,976
I love--
65
00:05:25,107 --> 00:05:26,456
oh.
66
00:05:26,587 --> 00:05:28,415
Oh, Mom!
67
00:05:30,634 --> 00:05:31,722
Wolfie?
68
00:05:31,853 --> 00:05:34,246
- Mm-hmm.
69
00:05:34,377 --> 00:05:36,466
- Oh, he smells so good.
70
00:05:40,165 --> 00:05:41,036
Hey, Mom,
what happened to Wolfie?
71
00:05:41,166 --> 00:05:42,690
What happened?
72
00:05:42,820 --> 00:05:45,257
- Don't you remember?
73
00:05:45,388 --> 00:05:48,173
When you were about six,
74
00:05:48,304 --> 00:05:50,915
you had a really bad dream
one night.
75
00:05:51,046 --> 00:05:53,483
And when you woke up, you had
torn his little head off,
76
00:05:53,614 --> 00:05:56,356
and I put it back on for you.
77
00:05:58,662 --> 00:06:00,621
- Why didn't you
sew it all the way?
78
00:06:00,751 --> 00:06:02,840
- So you would remember
what you did.
79
00:06:02,971 --> 00:06:05,756
#
80
00:06:05,887 --> 00:06:07,192
- # Sara looked down
81
00:06:07,323 --> 00:06:09,194
# I was beckoned by a smile
82
00:06:09,325 --> 00:06:11,893
# She grabbed me by the wrist
83
00:06:12,023 --> 00:06:13,982
- Hey, whose--
whose bed is this?
84
00:06:14,112 --> 00:06:16,201
- It's a rented house.
85
00:06:16,332 --> 00:06:18,029
- This--this is--
this is not my special bed.
86
00:06:18,160 --> 00:06:19,291
- It came furnished.
87
00:06:19,422 --> 00:06:21,206
- Where are my trophies?
88
00:06:21,337 --> 00:06:25,036
Where--what is--whose
hatboxes--whose room is this?
89
00:06:25,167 --> 00:06:26,473
Whose room is this?
90
00:06:26,603 --> 00:06:28,388
- Now you need
to just calm down.
91
00:06:28,518 --> 00:06:29,301
We're going to deescalate
a little bit.
92
00:06:29,432 --> 00:06:30,259
- No!
93
00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:31,521
No!
94
00:06:38,006 --> 00:06:45,100
#
95
00:06:45,230 --> 00:06:49,713
I think we have a hungry
baby wolf on our hands.
96
00:06:49,844 --> 00:06:52,020
- I'm not hungry.
97
00:06:52,150 --> 00:06:55,589
- This is your mama,
and I know what you like.
98
00:06:55,719 --> 00:06:59,897
- # Sara loves
her Juicy Fruit #
99
00:07:00,028 --> 00:07:03,901
- Wait, did you make
a special trip to the store?
100
00:07:04,032 --> 00:07:05,729
- Silence of the lamb chops.
101
00:07:05,860 --> 00:07:07,514
- # She struts
while she chews #
102
00:07:07,644 --> 00:07:08,819
# Nothing there
to slow her down #
103
00:07:11,213 --> 00:07:12,867
So good.
104
00:07:12,997 --> 00:07:14,434
- Oh, yeah.
105
00:07:14,564 --> 00:07:15,696
- Okay, I was a little hungry.
106
00:07:15,826 --> 00:07:17,828
You think?
107
00:07:17,959 --> 00:07:20,135
Okay, so what's up with Wolfie?
108
00:07:20,265 --> 00:07:22,790
- Well, don't be mad.
109
00:07:22,920 --> 00:07:24,922
I might have watched
"Forrest Gump" again.
110
00:07:25,053 --> 00:07:26,837
- Oh, honey, that is not
a healthy film for you.
111
00:07:26,968 --> 00:07:28,273
- I know, I know.
112
00:07:28,404 --> 00:07:29,318
I just love it so much.
113
00:07:29,449 --> 00:07:30,754
And I love Forrest.
114
00:07:30,885 --> 00:07:32,800
He just--he's such a great guy.
115
00:07:32,930 --> 00:07:34,279
He makes friends
everywhere he goes.
116
00:07:34,409 --> 00:07:35,803
And I just can't do that.
117
00:07:35,933 --> 00:07:37,195
You know,
I try to make connections.
118
00:07:37,326 --> 00:07:39,241
They end badly.
119
00:07:39,371 --> 00:07:41,199
I kind of feel like a failure.
120
00:07:41,330 --> 00:07:43,071
- That's a natural feeling.
121
00:07:43,201 --> 00:07:46,204
All you need is a good,
old-fashioned Mama Bear
122
00:07:46,335 --> 00:07:49,164
and Wolfie jammy night.
123
00:07:49,294 --> 00:07:50,600
- Just the two of us?
124
00:07:50,731 --> 00:07:53,298
- Just like the good old days.
125
00:07:53,429 --> 00:07:55,170
- Oh, man.
126
00:07:55,300 --> 00:07:57,041
Oh, man.
127
00:07:57,172 --> 00:07:58,216
This is going to be
a good night.
128
00:07:58,347 --> 00:08:00,088
Yes.
Yes.
129
00:08:00,218 --> 00:08:02,220
- Let's get our jammies on.
Watch a trashy film.
130
00:08:02,351 --> 00:08:03,744
Hey, hon.
131
00:08:03,874 --> 00:08:05,920
There's a strange looking
car in the--
132
00:08:06,050 --> 00:08:09,097
Oh, oh, hey.
133
00:08:09,227 --> 00:08:11,012
I didn't--
134
00:08:11,142 --> 00:08:13,623
- Wolfie, this is
my friend Albert.
135
00:08:13,754 --> 00:08:15,886
Albert, this is
my favorite son, Wolfie.
136
00:08:16,017 --> 00:08:18,541
- Ah, hey, man.
137
00:08:18,672 --> 00:08:20,891
It's good to meet you.
138
00:08:21,022 --> 00:08:23,154
Yeah.
Yeah.
139
00:08:25,635 --> 00:08:28,943
Man, I've--I've heard
a lot about you, man.
140
00:08:32,686 --> 00:08:34,731
Yeah.
- Wolfie?
141
00:08:41,782 --> 00:08:44,219
Honey?
142
00:08:44,349 --> 00:08:46,830
Wolfie?
143
00:08:49,398 --> 00:08:51,356
Did I--
144
00:08:54,838 --> 00:08:56,100
Wolfie?
145
00:09:03,934 --> 00:09:05,153
Oh, God.
146
00:09:21,212 --> 00:09:24,302
This is not how
we get attention.
147
00:09:26,740 --> 00:09:27,784
Hello?
148
00:09:42,407 --> 00:09:47,195
You get out of there.
149
00:09:47,325 --> 00:09:50,067
This is not funny.
150
00:09:50,198 --> 00:09:51,982
Get out of there
and come inside
151
00:09:52,113 --> 00:09:54,202
and be nice to my friend.
152
00:09:57,684 --> 00:09:58,946
Wolfie?
153
00:09:59,076 --> 00:10:00,164
7Wolfie?
154
00:10:08,085 --> 00:10:09,260
- Gotcha.
155
00:10:14,483 --> 00:10:16,790
There he is, Alberto.
156
00:10:16,920 --> 00:10:18,443
Hey.
157
00:10:18,574 --> 00:10:20,315
- Looking good, man.
- Thanks. You too, man.
158
00:10:20,445 --> 00:10:22,491
- Oh, thanks.
159
00:10:22,622 --> 00:10:23,971
Oh, hi, Mom.
160
00:10:24,101 --> 00:10:25,102
- Go and put on a shirt.
161
00:10:25,233 --> 00:10:27,104
- Why?
162
00:10:27,235 --> 00:10:29,977
- Because people are
going to be trying to eat.
163
00:10:30,107 --> 00:10:32,370
- Bother you if I have
dinner shirtless, Albert?
164
00:10:32,501 --> 00:10:34,024
- Oh, it's all good.
165
00:10:34,155 --> 00:10:37,375
Come on.
- Albert doesn't mind.
166
00:10:37,506 --> 00:10:41,031
So, Albert, tell me,
what do you do for a living?
167
00:10:41,162 --> 00:10:42,990
- Oh, I'm a jack of all trades
kind of guy, you know.
168
00:10:43,120 --> 00:10:44,078
Pretty simple.
169
00:10:44,208 --> 00:10:46,994
Yeah. Yeah.
170
00:10:47,124 --> 00:10:48,604
- Make good money doing that?
- Yeah, I do all right.
171
00:10:48,735 --> 00:10:50,345
- Yeah?
172
00:10:50,475 --> 00:10:51,433
What--what do you--
what do you make in a day,
173
00:10:51,563 --> 00:10:53,087
just out of curiosity?
174
00:10:53,217 --> 00:10:55,393
- Oh, I don't think much
about that, you know.
175
00:10:55,524 --> 00:10:58,919
But, hey, what do you do?
176
00:10:59,049 --> 00:11:01,530
- I'm a filmmaker, Albert.
177
00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:03,053
- Really?
- Yeah.
178
00:11:03,184 --> 00:11:05,577
- Oh, man.
179
00:11:05,708 --> 00:11:08,232
You know...
180
00:11:08,363 --> 00:11:11,409
I always wanted to try
my hand at--you know, but--
181
00:11:11,540 --> 00:11:12,933
- Really?
- Yeah.
182
00:11:13,063 --> 00:11:14,195
- Mom, Albert wants
to be a filmmaker.
183
00:11:15,762 --> 00:11:17,589
- It's interesting
because I am often
184
00:11:17,720 --> 00:11:19,069
looking for collaborators.
185
00:11:19,200 --> 00:11:21,071
Pretty high turnover rate
in my profession,
186
00:11:21,202 --> 00:11:24,074
and I pay
a pretty good rate, Albert.
187
00:11:24,205 --> 00:11:26,294
I actually pay $1,000 a day
for someone to come film me.
188
00:11:26,424 --> 00:11:28,949
- Ooh.
- Yeah.
189
00:11:29,079 --> 00:11:31,168
I don't know if you're
interested in trying it,
190
00:11:31,299 --> 00:11:33,040
but I could--I could teach you.
It's not rocket science.
191
00:11:33,170 --> 00:11:34,519
I mean,
I can give you the camera.
192
00:11:34,650 --> 00:11:35,564
I can show you
how to do it tonight.
193
00:11:35,695 --> 00:11:36,826
- No, no, no, no.
Bad idea.
194
00:11:40,177 --> 00:11:41,875
- You guys are cute together.
195
00:11:42,005 --> 00:11:43,615
Look at you guys,
little lovebirds.
196
00:11:43,746 --> 00:11:45,182
Little lovebirds.
How did you guys meet?
197
00:11:45,313 --> 00:11:46,836
What's the story?
I want the meet cute.
198
00:11:46,967 --> 00:11:48,882
Give it to me.
- Uh, the classic tale.
199
00:11:49,012 --> 00:11:52,320
You know,
she saw an advert I had
200
00:11:52,450 --> 00:11:56,193
posted up in the bulletin board
down in the town, you know.
201
00:11:56,324 --> 00:11:59,980
And she had a plumbing issue,
and I took care of it.
202
00:12:00,110 --> 00:12:02,852
And one thing led to another,
and here we are.
203
00:12:02,983 --> 00:12:04,419
Yeah.
204
00:12:04,549 --> 00:12:05,681
- Great.
205
00:12:05,812 --> 00:12:06,856
- Yeah.
206
00:12:06,987 --> 00:12:08,379
- What thing was that, Albert?
207
00:12:08,510 --> 00:12:09,467
- I'm sorry?
208
00:12:09,598 --> 00:12:11,252
- Wolfie.
209
00:12:11,382 --> 00:12:12,775
- What?
I'm just curious.
210
00:12:12,906 --> 00:12:14,298
Albert said
one thing led to another.
211
00:12:14,429 --> 00:12:15,473
I'm just curious
what the thing was.
212
00:12:15,604 --> 00:12:17,084
- Um...
213
00:12:19,564 --> 00:12:21,828
- You guys are being
super awkward right now.
214
00:12:21,958 --> 00:12:24,178
I'm just trying
to be included here
215
00:12:24,308 --> 00:12:26,920
and figure out where you guys
are at in this relationship.
216
00:12:27,050 --> 00:12:28,878
Okay.
I mean, what are we doing?
217
00:12:29,009 --> 00:12:30,837
Are we holding hands?
Are we kissing?
218
00:12:30,967 --> 00:12:32,447
Are we in second base,
third base mode?
219
00:12:32,577 --> 00:12:33,840
Are we--wait a minute.
220
00:12:33,970 --> 00:12:35,493
Are we fornicating?
221
00:12:35,624 --> 00:12:36,799
Are we sleeping
in the same room?
222
00:12:36,930 --> 00:12:39,846
- No, we're not.
223
00:12:39,976 --> 00:12:41,586
- Not fornicating, huh?
224
00:12:41,717 --> 00:12:43,414
- We're not sleeping
in the same room.
225
00:12:43,545 --> 00:12:44,851
I have sleep apnea.
226
00:12:44,981 --> 00:12:47,418
I sleep in the guest room
downstairs.
227
00:12:50,857 --> 00:12:54,077
- Well, isn't that interesting.
228
00:12:54,208 --> 00:12:59,604
So Albert sleeps in my room
229
00:12:59,735 --> 00:13:01,911
in my special bed?
230
00:13:02,042 --> 00:13:04,174
- Oh, so now
it's your special bed?
231
00:13:04,305 --> 00:13:05,697
- Yes, it is
my special bed, Mother.
232
00:13:05,828 --> 00:13:07,482
Yes, it is my special bed.
233
00:13:07,612 --> 00:13:08,831
And since it's my bed,
I would like to know
234
00:13:08,962 --> 00:13:10,311
what happens in my special bed.
235
00:13:10,441 --> 00:13:12,617
- Wolfie.
- Oh, don't you Wolfie me.
236
00:13:12,748 --> 00:13:14,054
We tell each other
everything, right?
237
00:13:14,184 --> 00:13:16,317
No secrets, Mom.
No matter what.
238
00:13:16,447 --> 00:13:18,188
Go ahead.
239
00:13:18,319 --> 00:13:20,930
What--what happens
in my special bed?
240
00:13:26,022 --> 00:13:32,202
- Everything happens
in your special bed.
241
00:13:32,333 --> 00:13:35,945
You remember when we watched
"9 1/2 Weeks" together?
242
00:13:36,076 --> 00:13:37,947
- Yes.
243
00:13:38,078 --> 00:13:41,690
- I'm living "9 1/2 Weeks"
52 weeks out of the year.
244
00:13:44,954 --> 00:13:46,913
- Well, I think
that is wonderful.
245
00:13:47,043 --> 00:13:49,654
And I am very happy
for you two.
246
00:13:49,785 --> 00:13:51,352
- So don't ask me anything
247
00:13:51,482 --> 00:13:52,440
about what he does
to my breasts.
248
00:13:57,445 --> 00:14:00,491
- Wow.
249
00:14:00,622 --> 00:14:03,146
Wow.
250
00:14:03,277 --> 00:14:05,192
- What?
251
00:14:05,322 --> 00:14:09,022
- You just crossed the line,
and you know it.
252
00:14:09,152 --> 00:14:12,199
Those breasts are sacred to me,
253
00:14:12,329 --> 00:14:13,635
and you're going to
whip them out at the table
254
00:14:13,765 --> 00:14:16,203
and wield them as weapons
of war against me?
255
00:14:16,333 --> 00:14:18,031
You're just going to give them
away to the first plumber
256
00:14:18,161 --> 00:14:19,162
that comes along?
No offense, Albert.
257
00:14:19,293 --> 00:14:21,034
You seem like
a really nice guy.
258
00:14:21,164 --> 00:14:22,774
But you breastfed me
for six years.
259
00:14:22,905 --> 00:14:24,776
You made me addicted to them.
260
00:14:24,907 --> 00:14:27,170
Wow, Mom!
261
00:14:27,301 --> 00:14:28,911
Wow!
262
00:14:29,042 --> 00:14:31,435
- What are you even,
like, talking about?
263
00:14:31,566 --> 00:14:32,697
I never breastfed you.
264
00:14:32,828 --> 00:14:34,264
- Oh, don't--don't start.
265
00:14:34,395 --> 00:14:35,831
- I never did.
You were too aggressive.
266
00:14:35,962 --> 00:14:37,441
- Shut up!
Shut up!
267
00:14:37,572 --> 00:14:39,182
- Oh, you were, like,
biting and tugging.
268
00:14:39,313 --> 00:14:41,619
You made me bleed, okay?
I couldn't breastfeed you.
269
00:14:41,750 --> 00:14:43,491
I wanted to,
but I couldn't, okay?
270
00:14:43,621 --> 00:14:44,971
I'm sorry.
271
00:14:53,283 --> 00:14:57,157
- You know, I noticed
that you have a rear--
272
00:14:57,287 --> 00:15:00,508
right rear axle
that's sitting kind of low.
273
00:15:00,638 --> 00:15:03,032
You got a jack?
274
00:15:03,163 --> 00:15:04,947
I can probably
fix that for you.
275
00:15:10,387 --> 00:15:12,781
- Let's do it, Albert.
276
00:15:12,912 --> 00:15:13,956
- Excellent.
277
00:15:14,087 --> 00:15:15,131
- Let's do it.
278
00:15:23,226 --> 00:15:25,750
Know what's funny, Albert?
279
00:15:25,881 --> 00:15:27,535
- What's that?
280
00:15:27,665 --> 00:15:30,103
- Albert Natural is
my favorite band.
281
00:15:30,233 --> 00:15:31,626
And here you are,
my new favorite friend,
282
00:15:31,756 --> 00:15:32,975
and your name is Albert.
283
00:15:33,106 --> 00:15:34,455
- Yeah, it's crazy.
284
00:15:34,585 --> 00:15:36,022
- Wait, what are you doing?
285
00:15:36,152 --> 00:15:37,371
- I'm getting the jack out.
286
00:15:40,852 --> 00:15:42,985
- The jack's in the trunk?
287
00:15:43,116 --> 00:15:47,163
- Uh, yeah,
it's generally in the trunk.
288
00:15:51,907 --> 00:15:53,039
- Huh.
289
00:15:55,911 --> 00:15:57,478
Okay.
290
00:16:16,149 --> 00:16:19,456
Okay, now, you're probably
thinking one of three things
291
00:16:19,587 --> 00:16:21,154
right now, Albert.
292
00:16:21,284 --> 00:16:23,025
The first one,
you'd like to be true.
293
00:16:23,156 --> 00:16:25,723
But, I mean, let's face it.
294
00:16:25,854 --> 00:16:27,160
We both know
we're awake right now.
295
00:16:27,290 --> 00:16:28,988
It's not a dream, okay?
296
00:16:29,118 --> 00:16:30,728
The second thing,
you'd really like to be true,
297
00:16:30,859 --> 00:16:33,253
but even the most
elaborate of pranks,
298
00:16:33,383 --> 00:16:36,212
they're not this elaborate.
299
00:16:36,343 --> 00:16:41,522
And the third thing
is exactly what it is.
300
00:16:41,652 --> 00:16:42,697
But I don't want you
to be worried.
301
00:16:42,827 --> 00:16:44,133
It's going to be okay.
302
00:16:44,264 --> 00:16:45,700
This isn't the first time
it's happened.
303
00:16:45,830 --> 00:16:47,136
It won't be the last.
304
00:16:47,267 --> 00:16:49,008
Okay?
305
00:16:49,138 --> 00:16:50,618
You may have found out
about this a little early
306
00:16:50,748 --> 00:16:52,620
in our relationship
than I anticipated,
307
00:16:52,750 --> 00:16:56,493
but it's not a bad thing,
because if your relationship
308
00:16:56,624 --> 00:17:00,497
with my mother is headed
where I think it's headed,
309
00:17:00,628 --> 00:17:03,109
you're going to be
my new dad, Albert.
310
00:17:03,239 --> 00:17:04,284
And this is going
to be something
311
00:17:04,414 --> 00:17:05,546
you're going to need to know--
312
00:17:05,675 --> 00:17:06,634
Albert, Albert, stay with me.
313
00:17:06,763 --> 00:17:09,332
Hey, hey, right here.
314
00:17:09,463 --> 00:17:10,768
This is one
very important thing, okay?
315
00:17:10,898 --> 00:17:13,336
Very important.
316
00:17:13,467 --> 00:17:16,339
Mama Bear cannot
know about this.
317
00:17:16,470 --> 00:17:17,297
She is too sensitive.
318
00:17:17,426 --> 00:17:19,212
- Boys.
319
00:17:19,342 --> 00:17:21,518
What--what is
going on out here?
320
00:17:21,648 --> 00:17:23,825
- Nothing.
321
00:17:23,954 --> 00:17:25,566
- What's taking so long?
322
00:17:25,695 --> 00:17:28,308
The dessert is ready.
It's getting cold.
323
00:17:28,438 --> 00:17:31,398
Albert, you want to come in
for some cobbler?
324
00:17:31,528 --> 00:17:33,313
- Huh?
325
00:17:33,443 --> 00:17:35,532
- Cobbler.
Come on in soon.
326
00:17:35,663 --> 00:17:36,359
- Yeah, we'll be right in.
327
00:17:36,490 --> 00:17:38,970
- Okay.
328
00:17:39,101 --> 00:17:41,060
- Love you, Mom.
329
00:17:53,028 --> 00:17:54,377
- Hey, hon.
330
00:17:54,508 --> 00:17:58,207
Hey, hon, I--
I need to talk to you.
331
00:17:58,338 --> 00:18:02,211
- What is wrong, Albert?
332
00:18:02,342 --> 00:18:05,910
- I--I think there's
a problem with your son.
333
00:18:06,041 --> 00:18:08,348
- He's a very complicated boy.
334
00:18:08,478 --> 00:18:09,653
- No, no, no.
335
00:18:09,784 --> 00:18:14,571
I mean--I mean, a real problem.
336
00:18:14,702 --> 00:18:17,835
- Well, you know, in fact,
he does have a--a tendency
337
00:18:17,966 --> 00:18:21,100
to be just a teensy little bit
conflicted about new men
338
00:18:21,230 --> 00:18:22,927
in my life,
which is why I didn't tell him
339
00:18:23,058 --> 00:18:25,104
about you up front.
340
00:18:25,234 --> 00:18:29,020
But I think
he's now mature enough
341
00:18:29,151 --> 00:18:32,459
to not get confrontational.
342
00:18:34,939 --> 00:18:38,378
- No, no.
343
00:18:38,508 --> 00:18:39,727
You're--you're not hearing me.
344
00:18:39,857 --> 00:18:43,861
I--I think
345
00:18:43,992 --> 00:18:45,950
your son might have
killed someone.
346
00:18:46,081 --> 00:18:48,649
What?
347
00:18:48,779 --> 00:18:50,041
- I opened the trunk
to his car and--
348
00:18:53,784 --> 00:18:55,177
- Wolfie!
349
00:18:55,308 --> 00:18:57,658
What did you do?
350
00:18:57,788 --> 00:18:59,529
I liked him.
351
00:18:59,660 --> 00:19:00,835
- I liked him too.
352
00:19:00,965 --> 00:19:02,315
- Then why did you do that?
353
00:19:02,445 --> 00:19:04,099
- It's complicated.
354
00:19:04,230 --> 00:19:08,886
- It is very, very naughty
and messy.
355
00:19:09,017 --> 00:19:11,411
This is on you.
356
00:19:11,541 --> 00:19:13,891
You're digging this one
all by yourself.
357
00:19:14,022 --> 00:19:16,416
That's right, mister.
358
00:19:16,546 --> 00:19:17,852
- Fine. I'll dig the hole.
359
00:19:17,982 --> 00:19:18,809
I don't care.
360
00:19:22,465 --> 00:19:26,121
What does this
remind you of, Mom?
361
00:19:26,252 --> 00:19:28,515
It's like Forrest and Bubba.
362
00:19:28,645 --> 00:19:30,604
"I gotta find Bubba."
363
00:19:35,261 --> 00:19:36,349
Maybe a little
help here, please?
364
00:19:36,479 --> 00:19:37,611
- Nope.
365
00:19:46,924 --> 00:19:48,361
- Thank you.
366
00:19:54,802 --> 00:19:56,020
- Chop, chop.
367
00:20:12,385 --> 00:20:14,691
When did you dig this?
368
00:20:14,822 --> 00:20:18,260
- Remember when I said I went
to the bathroom earlier?
369
00:20:18,391 --> 00:20:20,044
I didn't go to the bathroom.
370
00:20:22,046 --> 00:20:24,832
- My naughty, naughty boy.
371
00:20:24,962 --> 00:20:25,920
- You know--
372
00:20:31,969 --> 00:20:34,233
- Look, in fairness,
373
00:20:34,363 --> 00:20:35,756
I didn't know jacks are kept
in the trunk.
374
00:20:35,886 --> 00:20:37,453
Like, you did
all the car stuff.
375
00:20:37,584 --> 00:20:39,020
I didn't--you didn't
teach me any of that.
376
00:20:39,150 --> 00:20:40,456
And he was the one
who kept insisting
377
00:20:40,587 --> 00:20:41,849
to get in there
in the first place.
378
00:20:41,979 --> 00:20:43,633
I wasn't even planning
on doing it this early.
379
00:20:43,764 --> 00:20:44,330
- Yeah, but you didn't
have to give him the keys.
380
00:20:44,460 --> 00:20:45,679
You did not have to do that.
381
00:20:49,726 --> 00:20:50,945
- You know what?
You're right.
382
00:20:51,075 --> 00:20:51,989
- Thank you for that.
383
00:20:52,120 --> 00:20:55,210
- I'm sorry.
384
00:20:55,341 --> 00:20:57,952
I just--I struggle
with the new men.
385
00:20:58,082 --> 00:20:59,127
I always have.
386
00:21:00,998 --> 00:21:01,999
Don't walk away.
387
00:21:02,130 --> 00:21:03,566
Where are you going?
388
00:21:03,697 --> 00:21:05,699
- It's time to say goodbye
to my Albert.
389
00:21:11,008 --> 00:21:13,533
L'amour, l'amour.
390
00:21:25,109 --> 00:21:27,677
- Do you remember
when I was 10,
391
00:21:27,808 --> 00:21:29,592
and you were trying to get me
into that good school,
392
00:21:29,723 --> 00:21:31,246
and they didn't think
I was good enough?
393
00:21:31,377 --> 00:21:35,816
And you invited
that principal over.
394
00:21:35,946 --> 00:21:39,341
And you served him
lamb chops and red wine.
395
00:21:39,472 --> 00:21:41,212
And you told me to go outside
and play in the woods
396
00:21:41,343 --> 00:21:42,736
until you came and got me.
397
00:21:45,391 --> 00:21:48,437
I was naughty that night, Mama.
398
00:21:48,568 --> 00:21:51,397
I stayed on the porch.
399
00:21:51,527 --> 00:21:54,400
And I listened.
400
00:21:54,530 --> 00:21:57,620
I heard what you did
with that man.
401
00:21:57,751 --> 00:22:02,669
I heard his deep,
orgasmic grunting.
402
00:22:08,762 --> 00:22:11,460
I was just a poor Southern boy,
403
00:22:11,591 --> 00:22:14,594
braces on my legs
and a substandard IQ.
404
00:22:14,724 --> 00:22:16,204
- Wolfie!
- What--what?
405
00:22:16,335 --> 00:22:17,901
- You're doing it again.
406
00:22:18,032 --> 00:22:19,468
- Doing what?
- You're misremembering.
407
00:22:19,599 --> 00:22:21,078
That's a scene
from "Forrest Gump."
408
00:22:21,209 --> 00:22:22,253
- No, it's not.
409
00:22:25,996 --> 00:22:28,999
- Oh, right.
410
00:22:33,656 --> 00:22:35,092
Could it be both, though?
411
00:22:35,223 --> 00:22:37,878
Could it be
"Forrest Gump" and us?
412
00:22:38,008 --> 00:22:41,316
Oh, honey.
413
00:22:41,447 --> 00:22:45,059
I'm sorry I never told you
about the breastfeeding.
414
00:22:45,189 --> 00:22:46,495
Okay?
415
00:22:46,626 --> 00:22:48,454
I knew how you felt
about my girls.
416
00:22:48,584 --> 00:22:50,369
I didn't want to break
your little heart.
417
00:22:59,247 --> 00:23:01,467
- You think it's too late
for us, Mom?
418
00:23:01,597 --> 00:23:02,990
- I don't know.
419
00:23:03,120 --> 00:23:04,948
We're pretty different
kind of people.
420
00:23:05,079 --> 00:23:06,776
We're never going to have
a normal life.
421
00:23:06,907 --> 00:23:09,779
- No, not that. I mean...
422
00:23:14,480 --> 00:23:16,395
Do you think
it's too late for us?
423
00:24:07,924 --> 00:24:14,104
#
28421
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