All language subtitles for Inside.No.9.The.Partys.Over.2024.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP2.0.H.264-FLUX

This programme contains
some strong language

Just start, I'm filming you. Wait,
I want to film you at the same time.

Repeat the question,
please. What do you feel

about the fact that we're
about to start filming

the last-ever series
of Inside No 9?

There's a clue there

in the weary way in which
you ask the question. No, no!

You can ask me what I feel,
I'm asking you what you fell.

You might be, "I love it"!

Why are we both filming
each other on phones?

Well, we have agreed that
we are going to document...

Ahem - "agreed".

Half of us have agreed

we're going to be making
some form of documentary.

I am feeling quite
mixed emotions now,

just the thought that this
isn't going to be there

in my diary for next year.

This is very singular, and has
been a very massive chapter

in our careers, having
not planned on it.

Ahh!

I didn't do nothing!

They are putting Inside
No 9 finally to bed.

It's not just about
making series nine,

it's about looking back
at everything we've done.

We've met so many great
people along the way

that have come and done
this journey with us.

Yves has been with us since
League Of Gentlemen days,

through thick and
thin - mainly thick.

HE CHUCKLES

You did the very first
poster ever for Inside No 9.

Here we are, the end of it all.

What? Wait, is it the end?

THEY LAUGH

Hello.

Trying to get a spider
to go in front of camera.

He's just been
there, like, forever.

I would drop him
like a hot turd.

Hot turd? Yes. Hot
turd. THEY LAUGH

He just makes me laugh.

He makes me laugh so much.

It's the best job that you could
have, working with your best friend.

To have had more than 50 different
characters over ten years

has been amazing.

These bosoms are playing
havoc with my skin.

Put that in your documentary!

We've always maintained, I
think, an air of mystery about us

as people, so that's
why it's intriguing

when you ever get a glimpse
of us being ourselves...

Hello, camera.

Or maybe not! HE LAUGHS

I'm a fan. We're all fans.

I'm not. No, he's
not. THEY LAUGH

It's been a great adventure
these last ten years.

Last shot.

Now, I am going to lose you!

And I've barely got any
real friends as it is!

I don't even know if we
are friends any more.

And cut there.

Cut there. Really good.

Happy to move on. Thank you.

Go away, Steve, I'm
not in the mood.

Not in the mood?
Not in the mood.

Just explain where we're
going and what's happening?

You know where we're going.

Is it landscape?

We're going to
Manchester on this train

to start the beginning of the
end of Inside No 9, series nine.

INDISTINCT CHATTER

GLASS CLINKS Hello!

And welcome to Inside
No 9, series nine,

which is a fantastic
achievement.

All the pieces are set to make
sure that this project ends

on the highest possible high.

We were just talking then in
rehearsal about our scenes,

and the director said to Steve,

"Oh, maybe you could
be in the back of it"?

And I could tell he didn't
want - he said, "If I'm in".

So it's got to the point
where we're in our own thing,

and we don't even want to
be in it. It's inconvenient.

And now it's coming to an end,

it will be... bittersweet.

Because you've written it, and it's
been in our heads for a long time,

doing it becomes...

not quite, I suspect, the fun
that you might think it is

being on the outside of
it, because it is, it's...

serious, because you
want to get it right.

Everyone who we talked
to about the series says,

"We're so jealous that you get to
do so many different characters,

"so many different stories,
so many different genres".

Who else gets that opportunity?

And I said to you, didn't I
tell you, almost forcefully,

"We have to enjoy it, because
we're not going to do it again".

You did, yeah.

It wouldn't have even entered
my head to enjoy it... Yeah.

But he's saying I have to.

Come on, we're going to go
now anyway. Yeah, we're going.

Can we be quick, because
I've got voiceover at...

Oh, in about ten minutes?

MARK GATISS LAUGHS

What is Inside No 9?

Well, Inside No 9 is...

What's that word that
they use for the show?

Weird, uncomfortable.

Well, it's anything you want it
to be, isn't it? What's it called?

When there's lots
of different ones?

An anthology of beautiful ideas

about the human condition.

Every episode is
completely unique.

If you value your
lives, silence!

One of the best pieces of
television of the last 20 years.

It's beautifully constructed...

How do you turn this on?

Amazing cast...

Oh! You found us.

A fantastical journey through
the dark and the daft.

ARMCHAIR CREAKS LOUDLY

Every single week,
it's a reinvention.

Because they're self-contained
little episodes,

you can sit down and
dive into that world.

Love you.

You don't know
where you'll end up,

and it completely surprises
you every single time.

In the comedy, but also the
sort of horror and the darkness.

Ah!

There are no house rules.

It's all about
exploring the uncanny.

Spaghetti bologneeese!

Each episode has a different,

not only intellectual conceit
or idea for the story,

but they house it in
a different genre,

and a different
style of filming.

Dial 999 and ask for
an ambulance. No.

Series nine of Inside
No 9, it's the last one.

After this, no more.

It is an incredible achievement,
guys, you must be over the moon.

Could you put it into words?

QUIET CHATTER

I keep catching sight of
the Mulberry Close sign.

I'm thinking, "Oh, my God...
we called it Mulberry Close,

"and it's there". And
here it is. HE LAUGHS

I'm thinking, "Is it"? Yeah.

It's been put in,
hasn't it? It's a prop.

This episode is all one shot.

And this is our doorbell cam.

That's our doorbell, so you get that
finger that always sort of comes in.

DOORBELL CHIMES

Whenever anyone's rehearsing,
they're sort of getting in

and trying to say, "We could have
a camera here and a camera here".

No, it's just that.

Everything's got to
work on that one shot.

There's something quite
unnerving about it.

Hello!

We just thought we'd come
over and introduce ourselves.

Ken and Sheila
from number eight.

Can you tell a story
only with one angle,

only getting the outside bits
when it's all happening inside?

I'm in the middle of
something at the moment,

so it's not convenient.

It's really liberating, because
it's got to be all one take.

It's a bit like doing a play.

What we've found is that
with a static frame,

the more you move
the actors within it

or use different planes
or different angles,

it makes it a bit more dynamic
because you can't use the camera.

All set.

Thanks, guys, keep it locked.

And where's Valerie
in all this, Damon?

We'd like to hear her
side of the story.

She's up my arse, second
shelf on the right!

That's disgusting! THEY LAUGH

And then we've got Larry
walking in looking for...

Popcorn!

I'm looking for my dog, Popcorn.

I'm getting a bit worried now.

Come on, boy! Where are you?

There he is.

People'll be more
bothered by that

than any human we might have killed
in the course of all of Inside No 9.

That's pretty horrible. That's
more abattoir, isn't it?

Yeah. Yeah, also, if
that comes down there,

it looks... Yeah. That
looks like its willy.

Yeah. We can't have that.

LAUGHTER Willy. Looks
like its... willy.

It's hard for us, because
we've written it, and it's fun.

But as I said last time
you snuck up and filmed me,

it's serious film-making.

Yes. It's not,
like, dainty, is it?

I think you're going to
have to properly feel, like,

the weight of it.

They've got dark
little souls. HE LAUGHS

And they know what
will scare you,

and what will make you laugh.

Have you children never
heard of taxidermy?

Taxi... what? Dermy!

It's a way of keeping your
favourite pets around forever.

Let me show you.

This is my home office.

I've got a lot of fantastic
ephemera from League Of Gentlemen,

through Psychoville
and Inside No 9.

So I've pulled out a
few... a few memories.

This is me and Mark Gatiss.

So we went to a place
called Bretton Hall,

and this was before
I'd even met Reece.

This was in our first year.

Screws are the keyhole, and then
you're peeping through there

and you're seeing the
hare and a bit of a nine.

It was my art
teacher that told me,

"Have you thought
about Bretton Hall"?

And I was like, "What is it"?

It was a left-field choice
to just suddenly think,

"I'm going to go and learn
about drama and acting".

And I got in.

And the first time I saw Steve,
he was in The Taming Of The Shrew,

he did a Shakespeare
in his second year.

I played a part which had about
15 lines in the whole thing.

Didn't even have
a character name.

So I decided to go full comedy
- hat, glasses, tie askew.

An inhaler, a walking stick.

It was like Buckaroo.

It was one of the first times,
certainly, that I saw him in action.

Lots of funny choices
were being made.

He came up to me
afterwards and just said,

"Wow, you know,
that was fantastic,

"and, you know,
you were so funny".

I can't believe I would have
ever heavily praised him,

or indeed anyone.

So whilst we never actually
worked together at Bretton Hall,

we were just inseparable.

I'd been in hospital, and he came
round to play Scrabble with me.

So eventually, Reece and I ended
up sharing a flat in London.

This just sums up
our time there.

We would just cry
laughing all the time.

I was on the dole.
He was working,

and we would start
to try and write.

We had our project
with This Is It.

And we said, "We'll just
do a comedy sketch show",

so we did four shows.

And we just thought, "We've
got to do more of this".

And that's what we did, so
League Of Gentlemen was born.

I've got, like, a scrapbook
of when we started.

This is 1996.

This was such an exciting time.

We had no backing or
agent or anything.

We went from no-one
having heard of us,

three people in the audience,
to doing sold-out shows.

And we collected
these business cards -

one of who was from a
producer at the BBC.

She had a plan for us, which was
that we would do a Radio 4 series,

and then filming a TV show.

I caught him stealing
from the shop.

Who is he? Is his
identity known?

He's not local.

These characters became, for
us, our sort of double acts,

where we would know the other person
would be playing the other part.

THEY GRUNT

STEVE SCREECHES

It's never been better
than live, I don't think.

Okey cokey!

Pig in a pokey!

What's going on, Pauline?
You're supposed to be dead!

Well, I'm sorry
to disappoint you,

but there's plenty of
ink left in this pen yet!

No 9 was very much a
telly creature, in a way.

It was about the investment
in the characters.

♪ If you're going to cry

♪ Cry tears of laughter

♪ A smile takes much less
effort than a frown... ♪

When it came to doing Bernie
Clifton's Dressing Room,

We wanted to show this double
act that had this long history

of working together, as we had.

We gave the art department all
our old pictures, like these ones.

And we just said, "Turn these
into Cheese And Crackers".

So, if you look, there's a bit when
we're doing the ventriloquist act,

and it's just based
on this picture.

Sorry, I don't do
impressions! Ayyy!

We've genuinely enjoyed
working together.

Even now, 30 years on.

ELEVATOR CHIMES Going down.

Well, I'm filming
you. THEY CHUCKLE

Shall we stop at floor nine,
just for the sake of it? Yeah.

It won't let us, will it?

Oh, well! We're not even
allowed to stop at nine.

Although we are
stopping at nine.

We are stopping at nine.

It would be nice to
think that this series

felt valedictory, in some way.

But actually, it isn't, it's
very much business-as-usual.

And then, maybe... I
could throw your hand off.

Yeah, and I...

Well, then you throw that
hand off, and if I do that,

then we're back in
position. Yeah, yeah.

My relationship with
them has been very happy.

When I sort of bring
my input to bear,

it's usually about
style and tone,

and making sure that all of
the episodes feel different.

This is the only pure
two-hander we've done.

We've done Stakeout, we've done
Bernie Clifton's Dressing Room,

we've done The Last Weekend -

but they always had
one other character in,

and this one, we
decided, it's just us.

Makes sense for
the final series,

so give 'em what they want.

When we've got other people
in, we kind of jolly along,

and we're doing stories and we're
all laughing at each other -

and me and Reece, we're just,
like, "Oh, it's you again".

HE LAUGHS

Let's get some spontaneous fun.

All you people that think,

"Oh, I wish I could see them
filming Inside No 9", this is it.

Nothing happens,
you just film it.

In the midst of doing your lines...
I know what he's going to say!

Very good!

Natural likeness!

Intriguing! Ha-ha, mm!

So, is this... art therapy?

Did you put your
fingers in my tea? Ugh!

What's interesting
about today is that,

in a sort of weird
moment of circularity,

it's exactly 11 years today

since we were shooting Sardines,

the very first episode
that was shown on BBC Two.

Sardines is a genius
opening to Inside No 9,

and epitomises,
really, what they do.

We're going to open
this anthology series,

and we're going to do it as a
game of Sardines in a wardrobe.

And we're going to pack all
these brilliant actors in,

and just let them all
speak to each other.

Oh. Hello.

It sets out the stall of what we
thought Inside No 9 should be,

in essence, which is a great story
with a marvellous conclusion.

It keeps you guessing
right the way to the end.

And it's funny.

This is fun, isn't it?

Thank you, Geraldine,
yes, it is.

I do remember reading the script
from Sardines and thinking,

very quickly, "This
is so clever".

As you read page after page,
the tension of it ramped up.

Do you have a girlfriend, Ian?

Oh, er, no.

No - young, free, and single.

I was astonished
by the tone of it.

I laughed out loud.

There's plenty of room!

I felt kind of terrified
by the end of it,

sort of slightly traumatised.

I mean, they set themselves a
challenge from the beginning.

It's literally, how do we get all
these people inside the wardrobe?

How do you film that?

We did get genuinely
claustrophobic.

We have this breakaway
version of our wardrobe

with pretty much
the same dimensions,

but with walls and sides and
doors that we could remove.

It was kind of
gloriously indignified,

and I think they all
kind of... loved it.

THEY LAUGH

It's me, I farted!

I'm so sorry!

It was a real dream week and,
both in terms of enjoyment,

and I knew we made
something brilliant.

And what I love about
their episodes is,

there's a whole sort of
aesthetic world that they build.

So when I came on board to
direct the first series,

there was literally no template.

There were simply
these six scripts,

all of them amazing,

but all very different.

So the joy of it really was

finding the right
form for each story.

So, you enjoyed it, then?

Oh, yes!

We couldn't give them structure,

beyond a sting at the
beginning of the episodes.

One of the ideas that we
really all connected with

was this door creaking open,

casting light on
the shadowy space.

And in many ways, that's
exactly what Inside No 9 does,

it opens a door to a
new world every week.

Inside No 9 theme

I'd never hear that
without smiling,

because the circumstances of how
that made is just ridiculous.

We had a string
quartet do the sting,

and it was all signed off.

Right at the last moment, they
all got cold feet, and said,

"It's just not
quite as strident.

"It feels a bit genre" -
this, that and the other.

"Basically, they've
got an hour left,

"and they need you to come
up with something else."

I just wanted to
get them something,

even though I didn't have
time to work on this.

And I remember my
assistant said,

"That'll be impressive
if you get that away,

"because it took you a total of
one minute, 43 seconds to do".

And then I'll never
forget Adam Tandy going,

"Love the theme. Good work."

And just, like, I honestly,

it just was an immediate
improvisation that went,

"That'll have to do".

It was about series
three when I went,

I think this is probably the best
television I will ever work on.

And at that point, I
started taking it seriously.

CAMERA CHIRPS

Steve, how do you feel?

Are you actually filming me now?

Yes, just you and me
talking in the car.

I mean, we're talking
25 years' worth...

of putting our own
scripts onto television,

25 years' worth.

Now, I'm talking
seriously to you now.

No, no... Reece.

Do I start here? Yeah.

Are you pleased with
what we've done? Yeah.

Because Reece and
I shared a flat,

we ended up writing a lot
together on League Of Gentlemen,

and Jeremy and Mark
were writing together.

And so, when that finished,

Reece and I decided to keep
our writing partnership going.

THEY LAUGH

We thought, "We'll come up
with a new show - Psychoville".

David and Maureen, you know,

it's become one of mine and
Reece's iconic pairings, I think.

David, how many more times
do I have to tell you?

I said grapes. I forgot.

What am I meant to
do with all these?

We enjoyed writing it,
and it went to two series,

and a Halloween
special in the middle.

We're still one
foot in sketchiness.

Yeah, because he doesn't
want to talk to you!

There, I've said it!

We were playing
multiple characters,

but we had much more of a
steer on where it would go.

This very room is
where we wrote it.

We are in a little room
that we use as our office.

Nothing's changed! There's
still things on that desk

that were there 18 years ago!

That cup's been there
18 years. I know!

We'd prepared ideas for the
third series of Psychoville.

We got sat down and they
said, "So, guys, what's next"?

And it was like... "Oh,
that means not Psychoville."

But we said, "Er, sort of a
Tales Of The Unexpected...

"sort of show where it's a
different thing every week".

We said it because
in Psychoville,

we'd done an episode
that was this one shot -

that was like a little play.

CUCKOO CLOCK STRIKES

We thought, "Oh, that
was very enjoyable.

"Could a series
be six of these?"

Completely different story
each week, but different room.

So, we went back
into our pot of work,

and we adapted a play that
we'd written years ago...

Called The Dole Boy.

And it was about how when
you have nothing to do,

this feeling of being on the dole
can just suck you down, you know?

It's inertia.

When we got the commission
for Inside No 9,

we went back to our play and
turned it into Tom And Gerri.

I'm going to give
you two twenties.

No, that's too
much. Yeah, it is.

And we very much wanted to
make six very distinct films.

And the fact that you
go to a new house,

the easiest way to do that
is just have the number

on the door the same.

And then you just get a
different one every week.

And then that became
series one of Inside No 9.

Cut... I'm sorry. Our
incredibly expensive set.

This is the Bafta we won for
series five of Inside No 9.

And you have to choose one
episode to represent your series.

And we just said,
Death Be Not Proud.

Ooh! Let's go look round
that serial killer's flat.

About five or ten minutes into
the episode, the door opens,

and you just get this
iconic back of head.

Hello.

I'm David Sowerbutts.

And I used to live here.

It just had that more
Psychoville knockabout humour.

And sure enough, it did the job.

Crank That by Soulja Boy

URINE SPLASHES

I can probably find...
yeah, look, here.

This is The 12
Days Of Christine.

And I remember writing...

the 12 months of a relationship.

And then this was
a different idea.

Woman at bedside of her
daughter, friend, husband.

So I think it was putting
those two ideas together.

This is where
Christine took off.

Door flies open, and they're coming
in from a New Year's Eve party.

Fancy dress.

He's a fireman,
and carries her in.

It's the start of
their relationship.

Is that a proper fireman's lift?

We're seeing this woman's life,

but it seems very disconnected.

There are bits that
don't quite make sense.

And you realise at the end that
what we're seeing is a woman

with her life flashing
before her eyes.

The script turned up, and I didn't
know what the denouement was.

Couldn't guess.

I got to the end...

Oh...

No, I don't want to.

"Oh, my God!

"This is an
extraordinary script."

And I remember being there watching
the day that we filmed her saying,

"Goodbye, everyone".

Cameramen were crying.

I was like, "Wow, this
is... What's this about?"

Maybe it's to do with
that little glimpse

into that thing that none
of us want to think about,

which is losing anybody we love.

We're not prepared for it
and we don't like to face it,

and that made you face it.

Oh, God, it's just the most
incredible half an hour.

It's just the biggest
emotional punch.

I mean, I would be surprised

if people were expecting 12 Days
Of Christine to be that moving,

because the show had been
established as something else.

And I think that's why it
holds value for an audience,

because it's unusual
for a comedy to do that.

It was a million miles away
from The League Of Gentlemen,

and from Psychoville.

That's what I loved about it.

I'll be able to find stuff now in
our next project in these notebooks

that I've kept for 10-15 years.

So...

But when these are
run out, I'm fucked.

I mean, there's
loads of stuff here.

I've got this, which
was the first ever hare.

Retired from action
after valiant service.

We decided that we were going
to play a few little tricks.

There's no unifying thread
throughout all of the episodes,

so let's put one in.

The hare?

Whose hare?

The hare. Oh!

There he is, with big paws.

So that's in every episode.

The hare, obviously,
is ancient mythology

and this lovely totem, this
sort of mystical thing.

We spent weeks
perfecting its ears,

choosing the hue of bronze.

Really? No. None of that.

On the first day, the set
designer came over and said,

"OK, so, here's a
box of random props

"we think might be interesting".

Reece and Steve looked in
and pulled out this hare

and said, "Yeah, that's the
one we're going to use."

SHE LAUGHS What?

I think my favourite
one is Wuthering Heist,

where we had a
slow-mo explosion,

and one of the set guys
threw it across camera,

and in slow-mo, you just see
this fuzzy image of the hare.

You can always spot
it with the ears.

Sometimes it's very subtle.

We've had to put it on
pictures in people's wallets.

We've seen it as a
sticker stuck to a rail,

on a bottle of shampoo
in Lip Service.

I feel like a prize idiot.

I'm going to have to
watch them all again now

and not be listening to
a word anyone's saying

and just scanning
the screen for hares.

It's in more eps than me!

Fuck's sake.

Now, breathe. HE EXHALES

I think playing so many
different characters

and making them all feel like
real people, that's real talent.

I'm sorry, Harry...
this is all my fault!

They sometimes alight
on their own interests -

Reece's obsession with
magic and seances...

Give us a sign.

Steve's massive interest
in crosswords...

Have a look at one across,
and I'll make us some tea.

They've played over 100
different characters

with wonderful wigs and voices.

I'm afraid we've had another
complaint about the noise.

I don't know what
you're talking about.

And each time, they are
completely different.

I mean, it's extraordinary.

So this space is, in fact, a storage
for the costumes specifically.

Let's see what we've got.

Oh, you're like a
morgue assistant!

THEY LAUGH I mean, look at this.

This feels - I know exactly
where I am with this...

Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Hurry Up And Wait.

I remember, we'd done an episode
of The League Of Gentlemen,

where we'd been shown into
someone's house to wait

while they were setting
up down the road.

And we thought the
house was empty.

And there was a character
in a dressing gown,

very similar to
this, in the corner.

It's like 9.30am in the morning,

and we just heard this
voice come from an armchair.

"I'm having a
glass of champagne.

"It's my birthday today."

And then, years and
years, and years later,

you remember it, and you go,
"Is there an episode in that"?

I'm celebrating
a birthday today.

Oh! Happy birthday.

I'm having a glass of champagne.

Oh. Lovely.

Now, this at the end
is catching my eye.

I don't remember us
doing anything so...

gaudy and glitter as this.

Paraskevidekatriaphobia.
Of course!

Say that again?
Paraskevidekatriaphobia.

Is that the French way
of saying it? THEY LAUGH

Paraskevidekatriaphobia.

It's a fear of Friday the 13th.

I'd never heard of this
before, that they were unlucky.

But when Reece was a little boy,
he had a vivid memory of having,

I think his mum had
brought something back

with peacock feathers on it,

and his dad had come home
from the pub and gone,

"What are you doing? What have you
brought that in the house for?"

And going absolutely mad,
and threw it in the fire.

So that scene was a
tribute to Reece's dad.

You're covered in them, and
they're incredibly bad luck!

Well, don't say
that! They're lovely!

Look, feel them.

Get them away from me! Get out!

Get out! Get out!

Proms.

As a kid, I was forced to watch
Last Night of the Proms by my dad.

He loved - he didn't do all
this, but he was very patriotic.

My earliest memory as a kid
is going into a playgroup,

before school, preschool, so
you're about four years old,

and just, you know, the
joy of seeing a box of hats

and dressing-up clothes.

That, for me, was what made
me want to be an actor.

So, this is like that times
100. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm going to take you
back now, Yves... Yeah?

To when we had just come
out of Edinburgh 1996,

doing our League Of Gentlemen
stage show, and we met a producer.

And she said, "I've worked
with a costume designer

"who I like very much, I think
you should meet - Yves Barre".

And we say, "Well,
what has she done"?

THEY LAUGH

I first saw you up
above a pub... Yeah.

And seeing you on stage is what
was the most electrifying...

And the audience were absolutely
on the edge of their seat.

You could sense the
electricity flowing in a room.

That's what really,
really got to me.

The pleasure that one gets
being so creative is so high.

That's a kick.

Literally, this is the reason why
we're still together 25 years later.

Yeah, yeah. No other reason.

Now, this, of course, is a
beautiful series nine creation.

But we had fun with Wilma
Dickshow, didn't we?

Now, Wilma was a
real treat. HE LAUGHS

It was a real treat
because it was a drag act,

which we'd never done.

And, of course, you
went... you went for it.

There we are. My friends.

It weighs a ton. Feel
the weight of that!

It weighs a ton.
Whoa! THEY LAUGH

Whoa! LAUGHTER CONTINUES

These bosoms are playing
havoc with my skin.

I think it's quite uncomfortable
for him to wear them, so...

Well, he should have thought
about that, shouldn't he?

Yeah, I mean, it's not
a look that I do often.

Mark.

My drag name is Wilma Dickshow.

Wilma...? Dickshow. Right.

This is our fourth day of
filming Boo To A Goose.

It's a big production for me.

I just had a flash of, like,
films about New York's subway,

and you'd always
see, late at night,

some drag queens going home
from a show, sitting on a tube.

It's just such an innocuous
image in a grotty tube,

this fabulous-looking
drag queen.

I wanted cock, but
there's only...

SHE LAUGHS I'm sorry!

I'm so sorry.

Sorry... LAUGHTER CONTINUES

It's so fun. And when you've got
actors of this calibre, you know,

they elevate what
you've written.

Mark Bonnar, of course,

the frightening and terrifying
Mark Bonnar. As usual.

I'm a fan.

We're all fans, I
think, you know,

they're kind of institutional.

I'm not.

No, I know. He's
not. THEY LAUGH

They throw things in,

the both of them
throw things in.

When I'm kind of just about to
hit the zenith of my frustrations,

Reece has a line,

"The lady doth protest
too much, methinks".

And he added in, "Shakespeare".

The lady doth protest
too much, methinks.

Shakespeare.

LAUGHTER

Fuck... Oh, God. Oh, God.

I'm sat next to
him. "Shakespeare."

This was my reaction.

LAUGHTER CONTINUES

Luckily, I was behind
the camera at the time,

but I had to walk
into the camera.

I had to do my big
kind of mad bit!

But I was just pissing myself.

OK. Ahem.

STEVE SNORTS

LAUGHTER

The characters are
so well-fleshed out

that they are a
joy for any actor.

And the roll call for Inside
No 9 is legendary, of course.

I was just having a nightcap with,
erm, sorry, I forgot your name.

Shona. Shona.

It's like a British institution
everybody wants to be a part of -

and most people
have. HE LAUGHS

I'm so nervous,
I'm such a big fan.

I've got some things for you
to sign, if you don't mind.

Have you got your notebooks?

I've heard about your
infamous notebooks.

I'm going to show you one of the
first things we started sketching.

So it was going to be
called Number Five?

Well, we were just thinking,

"Let's make the door number
the thing that links them".

"Behind Closed Doors".
Yeah. That's good, as well.

What does the line
through it mean?

That means that the
idea has been done.

That's basically 12
Days Of Christine. Yeah.

Yeah, of course. So that
needs a red line through it.

Do you want me to do it
now? If you wouldn't mind.

He's sitting, reading.

Yeah, I mean, is this going
to make it into the interview?

What is the significance
of this place?

Because I know that this was
the birthplace of one idea.

We were here once.

I don't know if it was
that table or that table,

but there was three people - an
older gentleman and two ladies -

and he was insistent that he
and his wife pay the bill.

It tickled us, because
he was very insistent.

"No, you got it last time.
Let us get it this time."

"No, I want to get it." "No,
no, no, this is our treat.

"We said, we told you,
we're taking you out."

By the time we'd got to the
office, we were already like,

"Let's start writing that".

No, wait, that's not right!
Shut up, I am, it's on me.

No, you got it last time.
Let me get this one.

Get off, I'm paying it.

"I'm not having you
rule the roost, Malcolm.

"I know what you're doing.
You're paying this time,

"so I'll have to get the
next one, the big one."

Which is, oh, let me think, wives
and girlfriends night at Brown's.

Getting to these characters

to the point where we've
got this rivalry seething...

one of them's going
to cut themselves,

or there's going
to be an accident.

Yeah, but that's obvious
that that's going to happen,

because you're there
with a knife. Yeah.

What aren't the audience
going to expect?

He stood on my hand!

Don't blame me. So close!

And then it was only a few days
later, spotted, as you often do,

a lone shoe in the street. Yeah.

That's interesting.

What if someone became obsessed

with finding the story of that
shoe? The owner of the shoe.

What's this?

One of the funny things about it
was how serious he was taking it.

You can't go for
more than two minutes

without banging on about
a bloody shoe you found!

'Course I can! You can't!

All right, then - time me!

The whole thing
about Inside No 9,

and what has been
exciting for us,

is that there's not a
template in how to write it,

or the genre that you're in.

Incredibly freeing, yeah.
Really, really freeing.

Sometimes, we've
actually written it

and we've got to
page, you know, 20-25,

and you know the end's coming.

And then we'll sit in silence.

There'll just be, "What if...?"

"Go on." LAUGHTER

And you're praying it'll be
really good and solve everything.

Yes. Yeah, yeah.

And you can only do that

with someone you're
very comfortable with.

I think we've always had
our own little language,

and our own little
in-jokes, haven't we? Yeah.

We got into the habit of, when
we started sharing an office,

one of us faking a death.

DOOR OPENS

REECE SIGHS

Oh, no... THEY LAUGH

I can't even remember
how it started.

But we do it to this day.

Hello.

There's a weariness to it, but
we still do do it. Sure, yeah.

And is it just always the same,
like, someone in the chair,

sort of like that? Yeah,
usually, because...

Or is it, like, props and
costumes? We try - sometimes,

if you've got more time,
you can set something up

so it's a bit more elaborate.

I eventually want to
do, like, the Lecter one

where there's, like,
a Union Jack flag,

and he's hanging with
his bowels out. Oh, God!

Well, that would be good.
It'd take some setting up.

It would be, I've got to be in
there, like, the night before.

Out of interest, do you prefer
acting to writing, or are they...?

For me, 100%.

I've always thought of Inside No
9 as more of a writing project.

Having to come up with
and keep that level high

and keep surprising people,

as much as it's been hard
and we've moaned about it,

I have really enjoyed it, and I
will miss not having it there.

Steve'll laugh, but it used to be
that I didn't like the writing,

but I just did it to
be doing the acting.

Now, I don't even
like the acting.

LAUGHTER Oh, no!

We like the post-production.

So that's maybe one
part of it that I enjoy.

Hello, camera.

Trying to think how I feel.

Imagine doing something
for ten years,

same trajectory of your year,

and then not doing it.

And so I think
you'd feel strange,

whatever it was that you
weren't doing any more.

Even if it was just...
taking the bins out.

HE CHUCKLES

Room Nine - which we
call "The Killer's Lair".

Are we all ensconced? Excellent.

So, have any of you done
an escape room before?

Yes, we all have.

We've all been forced
to do one, you mean.

Because this is an escape room,

and we've been
playing it at a pace -

"Come on, come on, we need
to do this and this" -

we've gone ahead of time,
so there's a shortfall.

OK, and we're off!

Oh, Dad, I found a scrapbook!

There might be
something in here.

Even if we filmed
everything in the script,

we would be at least
two minutes short,

which is quite a
bit of what we need.

And it's a position we've
never been in before.

We've never underrun.

We're having to improvise
on our feet a little bit.

Last night, I wrote another
puzzle for the escape room.

It's 8.55pm, and we have
an episode that's short.

Yeah, trying to write something
that we can film tomorrow.

Oh, you clever bastards.

HE LAUGHS

Anyway, I'd better
get on with it.

The horror is on its
sleeve in this episode.

But then there's a lot of emotional
stuff with the family as well.

I still love you.

There's some comedic bits,
especially when Reece comes in

with this character of Doug.

Now, then...

Now, then...

I'm sure you've all
heard on the news

about the serial killer
known as Doctor Death.

Ah!

Ha-ha! Jesus.

We just try to get
the balance right

between all these
different elements.

It's an interesting thing.

I mean, interesting, when
we did Trolley Problem,

the fight that we put in
that, which was very comedic,

slow motion, drugged fight.

When you watch it in amongst
this really heavy drama,

I'm not sure we've got the
balance quite right yet.

One of the options is to
lose the fight altogether.

Please, I need my last clue.

It's always a fine
balance, but, you know,

they're two sides of the same
coin in a way, because, you know,

you're building up to
either a laugh or a scream,

so you're creating the
right circumstances

for a release of tension.

And it can either be, "Oh, fuck",
or it could be, "Hahahaha".

Why can't you hear me?! Over!

HIS VOICE ECHOES

Hello... camera.

Just to say, I'm on my way to
see Graham Humphreys today.

I'm going to talk to him about
the posters that he's designed

over the years for Inside No 9.

Hello? Graham. It's Reece.

Hello, I'll be straight
down. Thank you.

Expect him.

You wouldn't think, would you,
in this normal environment,

that there is...
dead bodies up there.

There's not.

One of the few things from
the past I've really retained

is the original
Evil Dead poster.

This is where I tell
people my career began.

You're one of the few people

that have been on the journey of
Inside No 9 from the beginning.

How many Inside No 9 posters

have you done, entirely?

Amazingly, it's nine.

We thought it would be nice

if each one had its own
sort of poster, you know?

Just to sort of set them apart,

and then, think, could we
get the person that did

actual proper horror
film posters, you know?

It was a dream come true even
just to think of the idea.

So this is an original script,

probably the only one
left, of Theatre Of Blood.

This is the film that
started off my, I think,

my love of darkly black
comedy, among the horror.

It's such a clever film.

Vincent Price, playing
Edward Lionheart.

I am well.

It is you who are dead.

I think Vincent Price
and Theatre Of Blood

has got everything
that we love about and,

if we could get
anywhere near it,

as far as trying to emulate
the tone of a thing.

And it's surprisingly dark and
actually... Really horrible!

Surprisingly quite gory,
as well. Yeah, it is.

The very first death
is really horrible.

I remember it really
staying with me,

because they chop him to bits.

EVIL LAUGHTER

SCREAMING

The Harrowing, which
is a proper full-on...

That's your... It's a Hammer
one, isn't it, really?

Horror homage, in every
possible way. Yep.

And even to the look
of your character,

which is so Vincent Price.

You have no need to go up there.

He's fine in his room.

You know, with a
lot of these images,

it's all about what you
don't put in. Yes, of course.

So, you don't...

Because you could have had
Andras, the demon himself.

I mean, we've got the light,

so there's a hint of something
terrible in an attic.

The actual demon is kind of dead
centre in the poster room... Right.

But you don't know that, though.

It was a particular look
to try and get him to look

like he could just be an abused
brother that they've left upstairs,

and not changed his
nappy and left him.

Or it could be a demon upstairs
that they're harbouring.

Oh, my God.

Although some people don't like
that, and they want to know,

"Oh, was it or wasn't
it? I don't get it!"

Devil Of Christmas, which
is our first ever episode

we did as a special,

it's the Krampus story, but done
like Tales Of The Unexpected

from the early '80s.

Not according to the Krampus.

Oh, Mummy, don't start
on about that again.

It suddenly became a
really fun endeavour,

rehearsing it for a week.

Adam Tandy, the producer,
sourced and got out of retirement

not only the cameramen,
but the cameras themselves,

which were antique.

And we filmed this episode that
couldn't have been more authentic.

I just thought there'd be an app
to make it look like early '80s.

So, you watched it, and
then...? Yes, I watched it.

And again, it was like
about what you don't show,

what you don't reveal. Yeah.

So, really, although there
is some reaction there,

but you don't know what
they're reacting to.

Kathy!

Behind you! SHE SCREAMS

And it was a joy
to do. It's great.

And it had a really
great kicker ending.

I don't think I want
to watch the ending.

SHE SCREAMS

The Wicker Man.

They call it the Mount
Everest of horror films.

And it's cast a long shadow,
as far as affecting our work.

We felt it was time that
we should do Wicker Man

smuggled into an Inside No
9 episode called Mr King.

Please get me out of this chair.

There's a moment where
you're actually filming it,

and you've got this kind of
cabbage thing with dolls,

Steve there singing,
"Long live the king",

and then, you've got
Reece with a mask on.

And then you've got these kids
with masks and, like, tambourines -

and I've got goose bumps now.

You're just like, "This is my
Shangri-La of directing, of course".

And it's absolutely delicious to
see The Wicker Man come to life

in this completely
low-fi, exquisite way.

This year, the crown is yours.

This horrible little thing
got put down my trousers

before they sacrificed
me to John Barleycorn.

This is from The Bones Of
St Nicholas, of course.

So this was Steve's prop
that he had. And I thought,

"Well, I'm having
that at the end",

my mask as the Captain Scaramouche
in episode Wuthering Heist.

Well, this was made
for the episode

that we did called Dead Line,

which is our live episode.

It's funny to hold
your own head.

Tonight, Steve Pemberton
and Reece Shearsmith

are tricking and treating us

to a live edition of the
award-winning Inside No 9.

So the BBC said to
Reece and Steve,

"Oh, have you ever thought
about doing a live episode"?

And I was always
absolutely dead against it,

because the only reason people
tune into one of those things

is because they want
to see things go wrong.

I'm afraid I have some
rather upsetting n...

SOUND CUTS OUT

So we kill the sound.

I'm very sorry, but,
as you can hear,

we're having a few
problems at the moment.

And then we kill the
continuity announcer.

WOMAN SCREAMS

And then we kill the
crew and the cast.

And eventually, ghosts
take over the entire studio

and the world falls into chaos,

and the screen goes black.

DISTORTED SCREAMING

MAN SCREAMS

That's quite a journey.

And to do it live - that's
a hell of a journey.

They pushed it so far,

I really started to think
something had gone wrong,

and I knew what was going
on. Isn't that ridiculous?

I heard that they were going
to be doing this episode

live to broadcast.

And I remember picking up
the phone to Adam and going,

"I've got to do it live, too".

My right hand was
playing a piano,

my left hand was
playing a cello.

I was quite nervous

because it was only the second
time I'd played the score

and actually could hear it.

..one... zero.

CELLO PLAYS Shot
one, three next.

Stand by with the caption.

I think one of the nice things
that helped my nerves as well

with Dead Line was... it was
all about a TV show going wrong,

so I could completely screw up.

To help this genuine liveness
of the chaos of it going wrong,

we thought, when it breaks down,

we had got our phones out, and
Mark had texted one of us...

During the broadcast.

Have you seen this
message off Mark?

On the WhatsApp group?

It says, "Put BBC
Two on now". Hmm.

It was weird.

It was like, you know, being
part of it as it was going out.

So, then, we put the TV
on, and we were on BBC Two,

so it was a reflection
of us standing there.

It was a very playful,
fun thing to do.

STEVE SCREAMS Fucking hell!

STEVE CHUCKLES

I can't grasp the enormity of it

in the way that everyone
else seems to be able to.

It's just, we've been doing it,
and we're stopping doing it now.

Endings are hard. We've
always known endings are hard.

I know.

Is there going to be a twist?

We'll have to wait and
see. STEVE CHUCKLES

I am turning you off. OK.

I am feeling quite
mixed emotions now,

and just the thought that it isn't
going to be there in my diary

for next year, where I've had
that for the last ten years.

I've always known.

Go on, slather it on... Do we
use that one? I don't know.

I just close my eyes
and things happen to me.

THEY LAUGH

We've been carrying
this story for a while,

because I remember reading
about The Curse Of The Ninth.

Yes, isn't it a sort of
superstition? Exactly.

It's the misguided belief that
a composer is going to die

after writing their
ninth symphony.

The pressure of what
you've done in the past

weighs heavily on
your shoulders.

And I think we channelled a
lot of that into this script.

So, for us, it's a bit like,

"Well, how are we going
to write our ninth series,

"have something that ends what
you've been doing for ten years?"

LEAVE ME ALONE!

Just trying to keep
my... keep myself busy.

I'm attempting to finish
a crossword on my own,

but... I don't know anything.

Steve can get all of them.

He's quite good at this.

We're in the second-to-last
week of filming.

This is our period episode.

This is probably
my new favourite.

Because I don't play the piano,

they're going to get a hand double
that's going to use my jacket,

this man here that's
taking his clothes off.

If he makes me look
rubbish, I'll have words.

I could do it.

PIANIST PLAYS

Do you want... you
want my head more...?

Yeah, I don't know that
they know how good they are.

Or maybe they do, and they
just pretend that they don't,

so that I say things
like this. I don't know.

What's really nice is, they don't
take themselves too seriously.

You know? Anybody else in
Reece and Steve's position,

they could easily become...

knobheads. SHE LAUGHS

It's fascinating
how angry people get

about things that they
think aren't funny.

People don't get cross that a
horror film's not scary enough.

There was a bit we were doing
the night with the jigsaw.

For me, it was, like, one way
was funny, one way wasn't.

There... most gratifying.

Glorious to see all
the little details.

Yeah, I think it should be
fingers clawing at those,

get it all away quicker.

That was almost gone in one.
Yeah, we've got another one.

I think, if you do it...
All right... more manic.

It's the rhythm of it.

The thing that makes it funny
is that it's a, "Duh-duh-duh"!

Do you know what I mean?

I'll tidy this away
for you, ma'am.

STIFLED LAUGH

No! LAUGHTER

Well, no, how could anyone?
It was impossible. I'm sorry.

Yeah, I don't know what it
is that appeals to people.

Some people really
like the dark stories.

I sort of like the
slightly gorier ones.

Other people just find
those too horrible

and just like the silly ones.

I like it when it
becomes quite extreme

in a really short space of time.

I don't feel like for
the last ten years,

I've only done one thing.

I feel like we've done
a lifetime of ideas.

Each one has its own life.
Its life is five days.

So, each episode, you know,
you just get through it,

but I think knowing next
week is the last one,

it'll... hit us, I think.

Is that right?

Is it the last death you see?

What an accolade!

I have died a few
times on screen.

I don't think I've ever
fallen to my death before.

Always nice to
try something new.

SHE LAUGHS

SHE SCREAMS

55 films.

It's an extraordinary
achievement.

Reece and Steve
have done it all.

Their range and productivity has
been so devastatingly prolific.

Any actor would give their eye
teeth to work with Reece and Steve,

because they're
brilliant writers,

but they're just the best
people to be on a set with.

The fact that they were able to
have almost total creative control

for ten years, and that they
were at the top of their game

is really remarkable.

And it'll last forever.

Hi. Hi.

Welcome to the last day
ever of Inside No 9. Yeah.

How do you feel?
STEVE CHUCKLES

I feel like I'm sick of
being asked how I feel.

That's how I feel. Yes.

Good luck. Thank you. Enjoy your
last day of filming Inside No 9.

I'm sure that there'll be
more filming like this.

Maybe not by us. Yeah. OK.

I think this is quite an in...

I've never seen
this done before.

We could have done a whole
episode. Maybe in series te...?

Oh, you don't want
to spoil tonight!

Oh, well, that ship's
already sailed. All right!

If you want to know the truth,

Reece, I feel like you've
been holding me back.

Oh, you fucking what?

I'm just saying, I'm
going to miss you.

You're my best friend.

You quoting Merrily Merrily now?

No, I mean it!

Good, well done.

I think Plodding On was,
without a doubt, the perfect way

to end the whole series.

It's Steve and Reece playing
versions of themselves

at the wrap party for
the end of the series.

So they brilliantly got back an
awful lot of guest cast members,

really mostly just to
be at the wrap party.

I watched it three times.

Cried each time.

It was lovely, all
the references.

I love the first
beat in Sardines,

it's the carbolic soap.

But here, she just sort of

decides to take it off the wall.

And then eventually ending up in
a confined space with Tim Key.

Oh.

Hello. Hello.

It couldn't be more packed
with Inside No 9 references.

No. It feels right, yeah.

The scene is horrible.

We find it quite funny,

but it is horrible,
that last line,

because we wanted to come up
with a really devastating line.

And I think you can't
get worse than...

I don't even know if we
are friends any more.

But it needed to
hit hard, you know?

Exit. Well done. Cut there,
thank you. Very good.

That was good.

Playing ourselves, we needed
it to be so far removed

from the actuality that
we could enjoy doing it.

THEY LAUGH

It's not real! It's not real.

When did we write this,
a year? A year ago? Yeah.

At the minute, I'm just
quite... fine about it.

I might go to jelly at the
end of the day, I don't know.

I'm sure you'll be
there to capture it.

I think it'll only be when we're
driving home on Friday morning

that we'll start to sink
in just what we've done,

and the bleak
future ahead of us.

LAUGHTER

This is our updates chat, where
we say what shots we're onto next.

So, we're onto four of four,

which is our final set-up
of the two boys ever.

Ah! Ever.

I'm doing a bit... Oh!

It's time, thank you.

THEY CHUCKLE OK.
The last shot.

I think that was good, putting
that last "sorry" in, wasn't it?

Yes, it was good, yeah.
It makes it all all right.

All right again, after
being horrible. Yeah.

I am sorry.

So, what shall we do, then?

There is a third option.

What?

Good. Cut there.

OK, everybody.

That is a wrap on series
nine of Inside No 9!

CHEERING AND LAUGHTER

Well done.

Yeah, whoo!

APPLAUSE

Do you know what I feel like?

I feel like having done exams

and having come out, and
the relief of just doing it.

See you all on Plodding
On, series one!

LAUGHTER So, that's how I feel.

You finally got an answer.

One, two, three! CHEERING

The end of Inside No 9.

What are we going to do?

We'll cobble a
stage show together.

We'll cobble a stage show together
at the Wyndham's, January 2025.

"And the cobbled-together
stage show can be seen

"at the Wyndham's in
2025." STEVE LAUGHS

Cobbled On. Cobbling On.

Cobbled Up.

Cobbled On. Ahem.

REECE HUMS A SHOWTUNE

Here we are! Here we are.

Look at this.

Stage Fright.

Who's doing this, then?
Huh? Who's doing this?

We are.

We are? Yeah.

That's good.

STEVE EXHALES Wow.

Now, you love doing stage
work, don't you? I do.

I think I prefer it. Yeah.

You get very bored very
quickly, don't you?

STEVE LAUGHS No.

THEY LAUGH Well, this
is what I've heard.

I think that we are best live.

Do you? Yeah. That's a bold
claim. I know, but I think,

certainly League Of Gentlemen
was always best live.

I wasn't sad about the fact
that we were finishing TV-wise,

because we knew
we had this. Yeah.

But when this ends... Yeah.

Goodbye! That's it.

Really? I think so.

We're not going to do the ballet
on ice that we talked about?

Oh, Mrs Tiggywinkle?
THEY LAUGH

You know, I think this is
the first West End theatre

I ever came into... No! When
I moved to London, yeah.

How about that?
Where's seat nine?

What are you thinking?

I'm just thinking,
you know, obviously,

we met at a drama college.

We started doing theatre.

We did theatre companies,
Edinburgh Festival,

small-scale things -

and then we've been doing
TV for the past 20 years.

And now we're back in
a West End theatre.

And we've gone full circle,
but in a bigger space.

Yeah.

Yeah, there is an element
of nostalgia, looking back

over this... ten-year period.

But it's not just us
that must be feeling it.

We've had people along the
way that have come and done

this journey with us.

They must all be feeling a
strange sense of disruption

to their next year, because
we've had it in our lives

for the last ten years,
haven't we, a structure?

I think that's why a lot of
people got quite upset at the end,

because it just felt like it's not
going to be there next year. Yeah.

I think that's it, yeah.
At least we've got this.

Yeah, we have this, and that's
why I don't feel so bereft -

but this sort of is the end-end.

But, yeah, I'm sure everyone's
feeling a little bit...

Reflective, would you say?
Reflective, I would say, yeah.

And it's good, and it's not sad.

We've left a great body of work
that we can be very proud of.

Yeah.

Proud.

Hello.

Hello, camera.

Oh, you're about to run out.

Just received this.

What do I feel? I mean, I'm
waiting on hearing what I feel.

It's the final lot of posters.

Yeah?

Oh, my dinner's ready.

It was on... and now, it is not.

Steve! Yeah! I'm coming!

And that's probably all you
can say about the matter,

because it was a great time.

But...

Oh.

Ah! That's how I feel.

So... let's have a look.

No final words.

It's been a fucking pleasure.

It's nothing very surprising.

Basically, it just says...