Original subtitles

Thanks, honey,

but I've got a bit of heartburn.

Let's watch the next episode, yesterday's was really interesting.

I slept through the previous one.

Did you do the transfer for the girl's excursion?

Yes, did you call the boiler guy?

- Yes, he's coming on Monday. - Okay.

By the way, we're out of cereal.

- Let's not forget to buy it. - No, no.

Good night, honey.

Don't leave me like this.

THERE IS NO PLANET B

Hello.

What are you doing? Come here.

- Mom! - Dad!

- Fuck! No, be quiet. - Keep going.

- No... Fuck! - Dad!

Mom!

We're hiring a nanny tomorrow.

What's wrong now?

Weren't you in bed?

- You're big now. - Off to bed!

I've got three sets to go.

What's up?! What's up?!

What's up?! Come here, come here.

What's up?!

Who loves you? Daddy loves you.

Honey, my jaw's numb.

Yeah, yeah, coming.

Sorry, go on.

Stop, stop... God!

I've got a cramp in my calf!

What are you on about?

OCCUPIED

THE KEY GAME

- Go on, eat up. - I'm not hungry.

- Why? - Candy.

- You didn't leave one for me. - So you don't get fat.

Charming. You're going dressed like that?

I have to set an example for my staff.

Your staff of three.

We topped our record for orders yesterday.

At this rate I'll have to hire someone else.

- We're going to be rich. - You bet.

Yeah!

See you tomorrow. 'Bye.

- I've lost my breakfast. - Again.

The groom wants to open the dancing with a metal song.

It takes all kinds, honey.

Is this yours?

It's mine, thanks.

I always travel in the best company, you know?

Oh, be quiet!

I think you overdid it.

Sure, otherwise I wouldn't have got them.

You know how happy I am to have these?

My little treat.

If only I were 20...

You can do that at 38 too. You should.

Mamma mia!

Sergio?

Laura?

But...

You're the same.

You were living in Los Angeles, weren't you?

Yes. We just arrived to set ourselves up.

Siena, my girlfriend.

- Hello. - This is Raquel.

- How are you? - Nice to meet you.

- Kike's wife, remember? - Stumpy?

What?

Yes, we called him that because he didn't lift a finger in high school.

- Are you still with... Antonio? - Antonio, sure, I am, I am.

We could have a reunion dinner.

- Great. - Yes?

Not to kill the mood, but we'll miss our flight.

- Sure, coming. - Ah.

Okay.

I'll call you, eh?

Okay.

Ciao.

He was in Schoolmates. Remember? The series.

No, I wasn't even born.

He went to L.A. to be an actor, but they say the best he did

was Brad Pitt's butt in "Troy".

And what a butt.

We'll have to move it. We'll miss the flight.

Let's move it.

Let's go!

Another Raquel Events success.

Just wait, the open bar is when it gets messy.

I don't even remember when Antonio looked at me like that.

If you want different results, don't always do the same thing.

Einstein, I think.

What do we do? Sign up for ballroom dancing?

Why don't you try an open relationship?

- Sex isn't the problem in itself. - Sure.

Obviously, I'd like us to do it more,

to try new things, all that.

It's been many years, we can't do it like the first day.

So, what's wrong, honey?

All we do is discuss domestic logistics and watch series.

That's marriage.

Maybe the trick is to not get married, like you.

It takes the cake, eh? I'm a wedding organizer

and I can't plan my own.

Everyone for dinner at my place. How does that sound?

- It's Sergio. - What?

He's inviting us all for dinner at his place.

It's the perfect excuse to break your monotony.

- No. - Yes.

- No. - Oh, yeah!

Look at her. You're lucky I like board games and not this.

Hi.

- I bet you missed me. - We haven't had time.

How romantic.

Guess who I ran into at the airport yesterday.

I've been killed now.

Sergio Morales.

Brad Pitt's butt?

He invited us all for dinner at his place.

- I'm sick. - I haven't told you when it is.

No need, that guy was unbearable.

Come on, it'll be fun.

Julia, Julia, rescue me.

- Rescue yourself. - Rescue me.

All my life I've done what I want and I've been independent.

I want to take a step forward, evolve,

grow.

A child is the perfect antidote for independence and freedom.

Isn't that a bit over the top?

Maternity isn't the panacea we've been sold.

If you live your life, you feel guilty, and if you don't, as well.

You never relax and you're more scared

than you ever imagined.

And when they're teenagers, forget about it.

Sorry, girls. I had a big fight with Kike.

I'm so jealous!

After we fight, we have wild sex.

Christ, Kike, she's your wife.

- Alright, Sister Antonia. - Conceived without sin.

- I didn't say anything. - You're hopeless.

You always said he wasn't very sexual.

Not being sexual is one thing, another is no sex for 6 months.

I'm tired of chasing him.

Girl, sort that out, right away.

How long since you bumped uglies? No cake by the ocean?

What's that?

When did you last hide the salami, Sister Antonia?

- In couples it's not all sex. - See?

Yes, but you agree that it's a muscle

you have flex, eh? You know about muscles.

Well, yeah.

The only whistles you'll wet today.

Manolito, speak for yourself, the night is young.

The night, maybe, but you...

Manolito, what a bastard.

- Sergio Morales. Amazing. - Now he's called Sergio More.

Remember when you shaved your head

because he told you he was a fan of Sinead O'Connor?

You were stuck on him, eh?

- Dinner sounds promising. - My God!

If you leave me by myself, I'll kill you. I will.

No, count on it. Lately she's been so pissed off...

Now she's bent on hiring a nanny.

- What's your problem? - Who cares?

Raquel will pay for it.

You're so smart. How do you know who'll pay?

You haven't paid for anything since the 90s.

It's a gender issue. A man can keep a woman,

and she can't keep a man?

You're right.

We act like feminists, but we can't stand it.

When men keep women,

they do all the house stuff and mind the kids, right?

Kike doesn't contribute with money or the housework.

I'd like him to be a functional adult.

He isn't, nor will he be.

But I like him.

He is kind of cheeky, though.

- You know what? I'm buying today. - Oh, great.

- I can't find my wallet. - Shall I help you look?

I'll tell you what you're after... Pay up, go on.

I have to come from L.A. for us to see each other...

- Morales Paniza. - How are you?

How is it there? A pain in the butt?

Fuck, you're the same. And this crap...

I just came from a protest.

What they're doing to health and education in this country

is a fucking disgrace...

Not now, honey.

- Thanks for inviting us. - No, jeez, come in.

- Come here. - You're ripped.

Yes, sir. You gym junkie.

Kind of. Remember Cris?

- Sure. How are you, Cris? - Great.

Great to see you. Come in.

- Jeez... Antonio. - What's up?

- Fuck, come here. - How are you? It's been ages!

- Ages, yeah. - For sure.

And congratulations, I didn't know.

- About what? - How far along are you?

Four months. It'll be a boy.

- He'll be called Sergio, like you. - I hope so.

- What a coincidence. - Laura, you look gorgeous.

- Thanks. - Yeah.

I'll shut it, eh?

Down the end, I didn't tell you.

Shots?

Siena, my girlfriend. This is Dani,

- Cris, Raquel, Stumpy Kike... - Hello.

- How are you? - Laura and Antoñito.

- This for you. Thanks. - To the reunion.

- Cool. - To the reunion.

It's got a kick to it.

Gosh, the first dinner.

Go, down in one.

- Yes, yes. - I drank mine.

- It's kind of strong. - It is strong, eh?

- Welcome. - A bit.

Gives you a semi.

The terrace is spectacular.

A real estate agent let me have it.

Siena's an influencer,

which basically means she doesn't pay for anything.

Yes, that's very now, isn't it?

Basically a 24-hour billboard.

That's the pot calling the kettle black.

- Mine are for social causes. - I support social causes too.

I make my living with this, I won't lie.

How do you do it? Take notes, babe.

By being honest...

Consistent...

- And authentic. - Great.

And by posting a half-naked photo every five days.

You're not stupid. You're gorgeous, eh?

Give me your account later.

Siena, I brought you this.

Straight out of the kiln.

Cris is a terrific sculptor, very sought-after.

My followers will love it.

I'll "at" you and put you on my networks.

- Yes, of course. - "At" you.

Antonio, get a bottle of wine, one's breathing in the kitchen.

Thanks, dude. Like it?

- Sit wherever you like. - Is there a seating protocol?

No, no, please.

- What was her name? - Estefanía Becerra Sánchez.

Becerra...

He was making out with her and he puked on her.

- Before you, I was a mess. - And poor. Well, like now.

Well, well, well.

We caught the Chemistry teacher jerking off in the bathroom.

- That's not true. - What was his name?

- Brother Berruguete. - That's it.

Bathroom Berruguete.

Well, that's enough stories. Let's play a game.

"I've Never".

I've never "something", and whoever did, takes a shot.

We know it. We ladies can play these things too.

I'll go, I'll go.

Alright, I've never made a paella.

No, it has to be about...

Okay, I've never made a paella... naked.

I have.

A wasp stung me.

I've never, ever, kissed a guy.

- I have. So what? - Dani, please...

- Acting class 101. - I'll kiss you, Dani.

I'll make your mouth...

I've never, ever, faked an orgasm with my husband or a stranger.

I don't quite get the game, but we have to keep drinking.

Go on, in one, Raquel.

Now we'll take the game to the next level.

We're going to play the key game.

No, no honey, they're not like that.

- What? Sure we are. - We are, right? We are.

The women have to put their keys...

in here.

Go, take them out.

- Got the keys? - Yes.

- Alright, I'll start. - Go on.

Look out, here I come.

Now the men choose some keys at random

with their eyes closed.

- Interesting. - Eyes shut.

Go for it.

- I don't know... - My turn.

Alright...

- Are you done, Kike? Me? - Yes, honey.

Go on.

Coming.

Last one.

Now open your eyes and find the owner of the keys.

And sit next to them.

- Now! - Come on.

- Now, go under the table. - Play a dog and bite.

I love games. We'll win, for sure.

Okay, what a fright.

- Hello. - Hello.

Now...

we fuck all night

with the owner of the keys.

You're kidding, right?

- What? - Really?

All night, well...

Can you imagine if I slept with Kike or Dani?

It's crazy.

STOP EVICTIONS

- Marta, what happened, sweetie? - I have to get out of here.

These kids need a firm hand. I can't handle them.

We have to get a full-time nanny.

Yeah, whatever you say.

What are you doing? Stop.

- At home, at home. - Please, it's nastier here.

- Someone might see us. - Risk it, honey.

Risk it, risk it.

Don't bite!

Antonio, shut up!

Hi, baby. Daddy's here.

- I'll take her out. - Not now.

Can you imagine if we played?

Raquel says that Kike is a beast in bed.

Really? What does she say?

- Sorry. Sorry. - What's that?

I don't know.

- Go, go. - Yes?

- Yes. - Yes?

Go for it.

Hold still.

OK.

- Let's go. - Hurry.

Hurry, hurry.

Not my neck!

Hello, Miguel.

How's your mother?

Good, thank God.

Why are you so happy this morning?

It's a lovely day, right?

- Antonio. - Finally a bit of "mambo".

If I wait any longer to tell you about last night, I'll explode.

Don't tell me you had wild sex too.

Feral.

We did it... on the daisies.

Now... I need a gardener.

We had three shags in a row. One, two, three.

Girls,

do you feel like playing the key game?

- I need to spice things up. - I sure do.

But no that, it's not for me.

Yes, it's an experience.

I assure you, sex with your partner later is incredible.

Have you done it?

Yes, but always with strangers in swingers places.

Why didn't you tell us?

Because you two are so... old-fashioned.

- What's it like? - A lot of fun, very arousing...

So, you and Kike are in.

With friends, it's another level.

Yes, it may be nastier, but...

And trying new things is good for the couple.

Look, it's the third time Siena's posted my sculpture.

- Have you seen her profile? - No.

Wow. That's not real.

She's 20, it's real.

I want millennials to turn 40 and forget this garbage.

She just uploaded the photo of a bar.

Well, it's coffee time, right?

- OK, we'll put it like that. - I came out really bad.

- Who are these three crows? - You'll see.

- Hi, cuties, how are you? - Hello.

- Siena, what a coincidence. - Totally. Sit down.

- No, no. - Yes.

- We don't want to be a bother. - Yes, yes.

Like this!

We had fun yesterday.

Until I suggested playing the key game

and you ran away.

They did.

Oh, they're from yesterday, the 90s girls, right?

Yes. They're not as open as our generation.

I go to swingers parties and I just got these boobs.

- I'll show you. - Cool.

- And you? - No, I didn't get a boob job.

Look, I'll tell you something. Vanilla's not the only flavor.

- What? - There's mango.

There's dark chocolate there.

White coffee, more likely.

Strawberry.

Well, if it were that easy...

Choose any man here,

and I bet you anything I get his number.

You, sure, but not us...

You? Women with experience.

40-somethings have incredible sex power.

- Well, 39... - I sure do.

It's all here. Go for it. Choose one and go for him.

That one, right?

Now... shut your eyes

and repeat after me:

Today is the day.

Today is the day.

Not like that. Today is the day.

Today is the day.

Open your eyes,

go over and get his number.

- Go. - Don't think about it, do it.

If she gets it, we're playing.

- Hi, how are you? - Hi.

Listen, can I get your number? I've made a bet,

those are my friends...

Then you go.

- No. - Yes.

- Okay, thanks. - See you later.

Incredible.

- I felt sexy. - Good.

- I felt like a babe. - Good.

I felt... nasty.

- Amen! - God!

Fidelity is unnatural.

Look, one little question I wanted... to know...

Doesn't Sergio get jealous when you sleep with other men?

We have an open relationship, with three rules.

No repeating,

no lying and no falling in love.

The rest is all fine.

Look, girls, no prejudices. We're here to enjoy ourselves, shit.

Why not play the key game? It's fantastic.

I've always been a tart, I said yes.

I don't care if Einstein says so or the Pope.

I'm fine the way I am.

I need new experiences.

You can do bungee-jumping or ziplining.

Have you ever thought about being with another woman?

I'd never cheat on you.

Fidelity is unnatural

and the fun is that it wouldn't be cheating.

Doing it with friends could be a time bomb.

Well, I'm dying to explode.

Didn't you say that before we had kids we should go crazy?

You know I'm into older guys.

Honey, you don't know them.

They're very, very chaste.

I bet you 100 euros that they play before the month is out.

Seriously.

You think everyone's like you and they're not.

It's like getting into water.

So, we get Siena to set it up?

Fine by me.

We don't need the millennial.

Hey, we do a bit.

I'll tell you later. Ciao.

You owe me 100 euros.

Shall we play the key game? No kidding!

Do I put on the G-string you gave me on New Year's Eve?

- What are you dressed as? - Just normal.

I don't know if I can.

Honey, please, they're almost here.

- What if you fall in love? - What?

I'm in love with you.

That won't change because I have sex with another guy.

It sounds so weird, my God.

Leave God alone and put on the G-string. Hurry up!

Then there's the weather, which is crazy.

I don't know what to wear.

Mid-season clothes, for example.

Yes, it rains in the morning in the afternoon is sunny.

Fucking climate change.

I always carry an umbrella.

Good, just in case. Good idea.

We're screwing the planet.

Relax, it'll all be fine.

- Shall we go over the rules? - Yes.

First, you can't have sex outside the game.

Second, it all has to be consensual.

Third, it's strictly sexual,

falling in love is prohibited.

Okay?

Well, ladies, let's start.

Good luck.

Put your keys in here.

Guys,

shut your eyes.

You know what to do.

Let's go for it.

They're mine.

First couple of the night.

Congratulations.

What's that crazy hand doing?

Call me Maradona.

- Bingo. - A winner.

- Play. - No party without balloons.

I know a hotel you're going to love.

Do you like adventure?

Sorry.

Sorry.

Are you going to apologize all night?

No, no, no. Sorr...

What if we get it out of the way?

They say seafood is an aphrodisiac.

Do you want to try something else

that tastes like the sea, honey?

Here, try it.

Isn't it like swallowing a bit of the ocean?

I'd lock myself in the bathroom, put on the latch,

and repeat in the mirror:

"Laura Navarro López,

will you go out with me?"

Then on the day of the dance,

I was late as usual,

and I saw you kissing Antonio.

I've always wondered what would've happened

if he hadn't got in first.

Well, we're here to find out.

- You wear a G-string? - It's... comfortable.

No, sure.

Is it...

...too much?

It's wonderful.

Go for it, boy.

Ave Maria!

Cris...

Good evening.

Get dressed.

I can't do this to Antonio.

Laura, Antonio's doing exactly the same thing with Cris.

No way. They're like brother and sister.

Yes?

They're perfect.

Right? 6000 euros.

You could catch cold, the AC's up full.

Want me to turn it down?

You know what I'd like to be up?

This.

Very nice.

- Phone. - No.

- One second. - No, no, no.

Oh, God.

It's Cris.

What happened? Why did they arrest him?

You won't believe it. We were in the van and...

- In the van? - Yes, in the van.

What were you doing in the van?

Good evening.

- Honey, are you alright? - Yes. It's fine.

She's great. She just fucked my husband in the van.

How was it?

- Sex in a vehicle isn't a crime. - I know that.

They started to argue, Antonio got it a bit aggressive...

- Aggressive, my Antonio? - Well, we were in the middle of...

Tell me later, because right now...

Long live Sister Antonia.

- How was it? - Your husband's a wild man.

Did everyone here do it, or what?

No, not me. Not me.

That was the game. And what about you?

What?

Was there...?

Honey, will you cut it out?

I want to speak to Antonio Muñoz, he's my husband.

- You can't. - Let me get past...

Lady, I said you can't.

Don't call me 'lady', asshole.

Maybe you'll get arrested.

Idiot, cocksucker, bastard, son of a fucking...

I'm her lawyer, we can work this out.

- What are you doing? - Take it easy.

Shut up or I'll put everyone in the cells.

- Penpusher. - Fucking hell!

- Don't you fucking dare! - Free Antonio! Free Antonio!

- Hold it! Hold it! - Fucking hell!

Can we talk for a moment?

Hey, copper, I'm a journalist

and this is a human rights violation.

- Honey, shut up. - You haven't seen anything.

I spoke to my partner and she'll get us out.

Chief,

could you kindly give me back the phone you took from me?

- Honey... - Don't call me 'honey', you creep.

- How could you do this to me? - Isn't it what you wanted?

- To sleep with my best friend? - Laura, this is...

Shut up, you've ruined 30 years of friendship.

It was a game.

I never would've done that, you hear? Never.

Honey, don't be unfair.

And you stick up for her!

Hey, you slept with Sergio and I didn't say diddly.

No? What?

No?

Have you ever been told you look like Brad Pitt?

- Tell them about the butt. - Will you all shut the fuck up?

I knew this would end up in a battle royal.

You wanna try a real schlong?

Siena...

Siena...

Why don't we pretend that the game never existed?

No fucking way.

We started by doing Messi's garden.

Word got around

and now we do almost all of the celebs in the country

and Miami.

Look, I'm not famous,

but I have a big garden.

If you ask me around, I can look at its possibilities.

Sure.

You visit the houses?

No,

only in... special cases.

Baby, Baby, get off.

Sorry, she's very affectionate...

It's fine. I love dogs.

- Really? - I've got one too.

Really?

- I take Baby everywhere. - I do too.

I thought Siena was a bit stuck-up, but no.

She likes the theater, she has an inner life.

I'm not sure about this game.

Honey, you really did nothing?

Nothing.

Cris always said he wasn't very sexual, but that much?

You gotta be crazy to resist this beauty.

You're so cute.

Stop, they're almost here.

Breakfast is the most important meal of the day, honey.

- Stop. - I love it, breast in the morning.

Stop it! Stop!

Stop!

- It's Saturday. - Let me study.

Take that.

Enough! Enough!

Now I got you.

I have an app they'll love.

You can take selfies, buy characters, powers, weapons...

We don't like plastic here.

Oh, well.

Give me your credit card number

and they won't be a hassle for hours.

What do you think? Amazing, right?

- Can you scream? - Yes.

- Scream. - Enough! That'll do!

My number's on the CV.

- You won't regret it. - I'm sure we won't.

Mom, he's pushing me.

- Will you cut it out?! - Milo, please!

How many have we seen now?

- I've lost count. - I need a drink.

Will you get rid of that crap? Thank you.

Sorry, this isn't crap, they're looking great.

And they're drying.

You know what? We'll never find anyone,

and our life will be hell until those two turn 50.

Then we'll die of a terrible cancer

because of the built-up stress. That's what'll happen.

Okay.

That silence isn't normal, is it?

No.

No. No.

- What are you doing? - What the lady said.

- What lady? - That one.

Natasha Sidorova, at your service.

Graduate of child psychology, pedagogy

and 3 years in Romanian Air Force, Assault Aviation.

I speak Russian, Spanish, English, and have diplomas in first aid.

Sit down.

The enemy is controlled from the air.

Plastic kills planet. Recycling bin?

- In the kitchen. - In the kitchen.

In the kitchen.

In the kitchen.

You're hired!

They get on great.

They're so funny.

Dani, it's got a lot of possibilities.

I'd like to get more out of it.

I'm your man.

- Hello. - Hi.

Honey, this is Pedro, he'll help us with the garden.

Great. A pleasure. It's best he doesn't piss here.

- Don't worry, I trained him. - Cool.

A friendly breed, huh?

Wasn't there a movie with a dog like this?

Siena called us to play paddle tennis and I have to go with the girls.

'Bye. Out of the way.

You can see my wife's not into dogs.

That's a surprise.

- That she doesn't like dogs? - That you're married.

Jeez, do I look... that ugly to you?

Hey, are you... married?

No.

And much less to a woman.

Sorry, sorry, I didn't...

- I didn't know that... - No.

No, it's just... you don't seem...

very camp.

Excuse me?

I mean, all the gays I know...

are really... effeminate.

Well, I've seen it, Dani. I'll send you a design, okay?

Wait, don't you want a beer or...?

You know what? People in my... condition...

are more into Cosmopolitans.

You only played the game.

Right.

I was the one who got cold feet, I'm an idiot.

Right.

I didn't think you and Antonio...

would really do it.

Right.

And, I don't know, wasn't it weird? Because...

you've known each other all your life.

Well, yes. A bit at first, yes,

but then...

we got into the game.

And what was it like?

I'm not quite sure...

if the rules let us talk about this.

You can't be that scrupulous about rules,

you flouted the universal rule between friends.

"Don't sleep with your best friend's husband".

You're angry.

What was I meant to do, according to you?

I got him.

Pretend to be sick,

make up an excuse.

It's an option, yes.

That's precisely what the game is about, Laura,

sleeping with the husband of one of your friends.

And you suggested it. You wanted to play, didn't you?

Yes.

I did, actually.

She's one of my new friends

who I thrashed today, here at Smith Paddle,

the city's top paddle tennis club.

It wasn't such a thrashing. Hashtag #RaquelEvents.

Excuse me, I was too tired to play today.

I didn't sleep a wink last night.

We did a role-play game.

I had to be a hooker,

walk to a vacant lot,

then Kike picked me up in the car.

I charged him 30 bucks.

You should do that with Antonio, but charge him 50.

Antonio's not into those games.

Those games nourish couples.

Obviously.

This key game...

- Do you play it often? - Yes.

Why?

Because I want to play again.

Empathy,

effort and endeavor.

Great endeavor.

If you follow the three E's, you'll be a good messenger.

Right, off you go and make people happy.

Hey, Antonio.

- Yes? - Thanks for the job, eh?

Don't mention it, Sergio. I planned on increasing the staff.

Being an actor isn't easy.

Hey, are you...

going to Siena's game?

Siena's game?

No, it's worse than playing Russian roulette.

But think it over, eh?

We...

all need a little adventure.

If you don't give it to her,

maybe someone else will.

Endeavor.

Endeavor.

It's great you came.

Maybe we'll get lucky today.

We will.

- I didn't know if you'd come. - Laura convinced me.

Well, I'm glad.

- Hey, the ladies are up for it! - Lady?

Who are you calling lady, kid? How are you?

- Great. And you? - I gotta pee.

That way. C'mon.

Attention!

It's about to start.

Gentlemen,

put your keys in here.

No, the women put their keys in.

We're switching it up.

Rules are rules. Changing it willy-nilly...

What does it matter?

It's good that we get to choose.

Yes. The other way's a bit sexist, isn't it?

No, no, you have to be serious, methodical.

No, Laura, it's fine, it's silly.

Sorry. It's... just nerves.

Girls, you know what to do.

Laura.

Find your partner.

Mine.

Hello.

The globe is mine.

- These? - Me.

Thanks.

Mine.

Isn't that against the rules?

- What is? - Well, the... repeating thing, right?

Cris and I got.... well, the last game...

You can't repeat outside the game, but inside you can.

They're mine, mine.

- Today's the day. - What?

Nothing, the photos...

You're into sport.

Touch me.

I'm glad you like it, ma'am, because you...

Don't call me "ma'am",

you make me feel old.

Experience has its pluses.

I've only been with my husband.

Ring a bell?

Yes, yes, it's very... polished.

Cris, are you sure?

- If Laura finds out that... - Laura's fine.

Don't you believe it. Lately she's been... wound up.

Can we forget your wife for a moment?

You'll like it. The prostate is the men's G-spot.

Tell me more.

Choose what you like, now we're really going to play.

Don't let it fool you.

Six vibration modes. You're gonna freak.

I'm sorry,

I think it's the steroids.

Hello,

they say very sick man here

who need palliative care.

Hold on, eh?

Hold on. Stay right there.

Yeah.

Or maybe they say you bad boy

and he need punishment.

I'm very angry, sir.

But I am serf and your slave.

And the punishment is...

...this.

I can't, Raquel.

I can't.

I can't stop thinking about Laura.

Champagne goes best with oysters.

White wine's a good option too,

especially if it's from the region of...

- Being gay isn't a sin. - What do you mean?

Look, I've got nothing against gays, but I assure you...

- You don't have to fake it with me. - Siena, I'm not...

I've never been into men.

Hey, I swear.

We all have something heterosexual, bisexual or homosexual.

Are you ashamed?

Is that it?

I met a guy.

We've barely spoken, but...

I don't know.

I think I like him. I don't know, it's so weird.

No, no, it's not weird.

You're open, Daniel.

Sexuality isn't something rigid.

This stupid obsession with cataloging everything...

- It's shit. - But I love Cris.

- And you're into someone else. - Sure, but a man?

The easiest thing would be to not see him again, but...

I don't want that either.

You have to experiment to dispel the doubt.

I don't want to be unfaithful.

I'm going to have a party for my birthday,

a big key game open to all sexualities.

A good way to experiment without feeling you're unfaithful.

I'm looking for the place now. I want it to be luxurious.

- I have the ideal house. - Really?

Yes, a mansion my family has.

In the country, remote and with over 20 rooms.

Done.

Tell me about this guy.

I screwed up.

Dobro pozhalovat, Mr. Macho.

Sorry, I forget children snack.

Honey,

I'm worn out.

Hi!

Hi!

What are you doing tonight?

Julia's going to a friend's house

and Antonio wants to finish his series. Why?

- Do you like this or not? - It's dull.

Like there are no dull brides.

Hey, isn't that...? Is it or not?

It is. Act natural, eh? This is a big deal.

As if she was your old friend.

- Hello. - Hello.

Hi. Your place is wonderful, I love it.

Make yourself at home. Elegance and discretion.

The perfect spot for a celebrity.

Do you have a little secret?

Congratulations, honey.

I've been spying on you... in the social networks.

I saw that you've never planned a wedding for a celebrity.

Depends. Maybe we're so discreet that you didn't find out.

Perfect, but before we negotiate,

you have to sign a confidentiality agreement.

- Of course, we always do. - Mum's the word.

Then I'll tell you my idea, okay? I want something...

family, simple, moving.

But the main thing is that it's intimate and secret.

- You're in the best hands. - Okay.

Now I have one question, before starting, in confidence.

Yes?

Are the people on your show actors?

For a non-homophobe, it came out pretty easy.

I'm sorry, sometimes I say things...

Doesn't it happen to you?

You say something, then you think:

Why the hell did I say that?

Sure, it's normal.

I like you a lot, Pedro.

And I like you, Dani.

Maybe I went too fast, but I guess...

I saw you were... interested.

Oh, yeah?

You took it for granted that I was...

Totally.

Someone who's always been hetero,

can they maybe, overnight,

feel...

attracted to you?

if you want, I can suggest a very simple way...

of finding out.

No, no, wait.

Honey, I'm ready.

Comrade, bark.

Okay.

No, no, no. Louder.

Like that, or is it too hard?

- Hard, but not that hard. - Okay, you tell me, okay?

Okay. Medium intensity.

- You bad boy, yes? - Yes. Very bad.

- Yes. Now you do homework! - Homework.

Like that.

Yes.

- Now you do me. - I'm a bit conflicted, but...

- Alright. - Fine.

You very bad.

A bit, yes.

Bad boys must get punishment.

Fuuuck.

Air in ass. Air in ass.

- What did she say? - Put your ass in the air.

How is it?

No, no...

How are you?

- Hi. - Hi.

- Shall we go? - Let's go.

- Does it have gin? - A little gin.

- You don't want to get me drunk? - No.

The main thing is the lime.

Alright...

Savor it.

What else is in it?

Honey!

Yes?

I'm taking the present to Julia.

Want me to go with you?

No, no. Have fun.

Everything alright?

Yes, yes.

It couldn't be better.

But I need a little time.

It's all very weird, isn't it?

Sometimes there's no need to understand everything.

Godmother!

Honey, I got you a game.

I can't really play, but you can show me, okay?

Yes, relax.

Oh, you have to see

how soon we forget

You have to be

a fool to remember

But I...

I can't help thinking about you

One love goes, another comes

taking...

its place

But I...

I can't help thinking about you

I think Dani likes Pedro.

What Pedro?

The guy fixing up our garden.

- What are you saying, Cris? - I saw them... all lovey-dovey.

What? What?

Dani with a guy? No, no, it can't be.

He hasn't touched me for months, not a bit.

He's gay.

Well, or... bisexual.

Can I kiss you?

Isn't that against the rules?

...a fool to remember

But I...

I can't help thinking about you

Thinking about you

Thinking about you

Do we kiss now?

If you don't, I'll kill you.

No, Laura.

It's Julia, hold on.

Yes?

What?

Did you call your father?

Where is he?

Okay, okay. I'm coming.

Someone's put the evil eye on us.

Fuck the rules.

Exactly, let them report us.

Where were you?

What's wrong? Was the gig no good?

I had to open up for Julia, she forgot her keys.

Now I get your bad mood. You missed the bonus track.

- How was last night? - Good.

The guys at work are a blast.

How long will you keep lying to me?

What, now you go through my things?

Did you go with Laura?

Did you sleep together?

Don't we have an open relationship?

Yes, and the first rule: don't lie. Did you fall in love with her?

You know your problem?

You act all modern,

but you're more conventional than all your friends.

Going back to your high school girlfriend

won't make you 15 again.

Siena.

- What's this? - My godmother gave it to me.

Cris was here?

She brought Julia's presents. I saw her home,

that's why I wasn't here when you arrive.

She also brought me the latest Mortal Kombat.

Don't kill her.

I don't know.

I'm going.

Do I have to kill her?

Do I have to kill Sergio?

We went to a concert, nothing happened.

Can you say the same?

I know why you insisted on playing that game.

You wanted to sleep with Sergio without feeling guilty,

but your play backfired, Laura,

and you did it yesterday. That's great.

Believe it or not, you're still the only man I've been with.

Here, the one who slept twice with my best friend is you.

- Yes, with your consent. - No, you didn't ask me yesterday.

Don't make me feel guilty for you falling for Cris.

Antonio!

You're fired.

Early bird catch worm, you say this, true?

- Yes. - Off to school, quickly.

Right, off you go.

- Share, eh? - 'Bye.

- Share. - 'Bye, babies.

'Bye.

Be good, otherwise...

No way.

We have no money in the joint account?

- We don't? - No.

Oh, yes. I bought a laptop, it's awesome.

Yours was from last year.

You're going to make a scene over 1200 euros?

When were you last paid for an article?

Money isn't everything, honey.

Right, especially if other people give it to you.

- I have no expenses here. - Sure.

You don't live here, or eat or drink

or wipe you ass with the toilet paper I buy, right?

Do you want me...

to take any old normal job?

You must be able to make money doing what you like.

You're naïve, honey.

In this world, not if you're honest.

You have to do something because I'm getting fed up!

"Confidential".

"Lidia Torrent".

Oh, from First Dates.

It's the first time I've seen you look so serous.

I can't stand him.

Well,

or quite the opposite, no?

You're in love, it's... beautiful.

Yes, it'd be beautiful if he loved me,

because like this, no.

Don't take any notice of me.

I'm the most open person in the world...

I think I'll have to ask for the advice of the 90s girls.

I'm sure they've had a lot more letdowns in love that I have.

And you?

Did you send Pedro the invitation?

- What's she doing here? - Calm down, please.

How are you?

You're seriously asking that?

We should never have played this game.

- It's not that either. - No, that's not the problem.

It's that there's no sex outside the game

and falling in love was forbidden. And you fell in love with my husband.

You fell in love with my husband? Seriously?

- Me? What?! - And you with Sergio?

Me? What?!

Besides, Dani and I are thinking of having a baby.

- Really? - Yes.

- Congratulations. - Thanks.

All this game has done

has uncovered the shit you two had under the rug.

Why don't we go to Siena's birthday and give it all we've got?

And celebrate your baby.

Well, it's an idea, no need to celebrate it now...

Don't tell me you don't fancy a bit of horseplay.

- I don't believe it. Son of a bitch. - What?

Lidia Torrent: Can you explain this?

Kike Tarragona: Raquel Events is planning Lidia Torrent's wedding.

The popular presenter will wear a dress...

- I'm dying here. - What an idiot.

- I'm dying here. Idiot? - Relax.

Idiot? This whole empire has just fallen on me.

What's Raquel Events now, "Sharon Events"?

- Breathe. - No, I'm dying here.

- Breathe. - Breathe how? With what?

- Okay, Raquel. - I've got no space.

Natasha, look: trending topic.

This society's going to shit.

- Just like you, you idiot. - Kike bad boy?

Do you know the fortune I have to pay Lidia Torrent

for breaching the contract of confidentiality?

Hold on. You insisted that I make some money.

But not at the cost of ruining my business!

- But this is publicity. - I should kill you right now.

Just as well you never wanted to marry me,

because I'd have to pay you alimony as well.

Get out of my house. Today!

Natasha, dear, your stew's burning.

Since when does this guy play the guitar?

Dani: Pedro, would you come to a friend's birthday with me?

Do you feel like going?

Yes. Why?

Don't you feel like going?

- Yes, I do. - If you don't, we won't go.

No, no, we'll have fun.

Okay.

I'll be ready in a sec.

- You're really going? - Of course.

I warn you, you and Kike aren't invited.

You're kidding.

No. Weren't you convinced that I did all this

to screw Sergio?

That's what I'm doing.

See you later.

Kike. Kike. Did you hear?

We're banned from the party.

Raquel kicked you out of the house?

Honey, they're here.

Oh, it's great that you came! This is so nice!

I wouldn't have missed it.

If you'd be so kind as to leave your phones here, please.

Wow, how mysterious! What's this about?

You'll find out.

There's a strict dress code. They'll explain it.

Go ahead.

- No fear. - Now what?

Now enjoy the evening.

Pedro hasn't answered me.

He'll come.

Relax and enjoy it.

Kike, let me talk and keep your composure.

Please, it's like you don't know me.

- The bouncer's huge. - Will you shut up?

- Where do they get those clothes? - Shut up.

- Good evening. - Your name, please.

- We're friends of Siena. - Names.

- Kike Tarragona and... - Antonio Muñoz.

You're not on the list.

What? No way, impossible.

- We must be. - Have a good look.

Siena insisted that we come.

Oh, yes, here you are.

On the blacklist.

Will you move, please? You're forming a line.

- Hell of a line, eh? - Shut up, Kike.

Goodnight. All the best.

Let's go.

And they want to sneak in... As usual, every night.

Welcome to the grand fiesta of the key game.

In this wonderful mansion are rooms for all tastes.

There's the latex room, the swings room

and the home sweet home for puppies,

where you beloved mistress will do with you as she pleases.

I'm not going there.

And in the basement is the BDSM dungeon.

Enough said.

The what?

Bondage, discipline, sadism, masochism.

- Where have you brought me? - This is an orgy, babe.

Girl, I expected no less.

There are 20 rooms with different capacities.

There are rooms for two and three.

And larger rooms for more people.

- Even more people? - Shh, they'll throw us out.

It will all depend on the keys you get.

In the common areas there is a strict vow of silence.

It was her.

You must keep your masks on.

Before beginning, I remind you of the basic rules.

Everyone must be treated with respect.

Everything must be with the consent of the other.

And always with a condom.

In the rooms and dungeon the safeword is "red".

- We had to wear red? - No, silly, it's for the sadism.

The safeword is for if you want to stop.

- Okay, great. I'm going. - Don't go.

Serge and Lorraine have in their bowls... the keys!

I officially open...

the key game.

Hey, don't push. You're keen!

Get me one.

Hey, hey, hey.

I haven't sneaked into a party since high school.

Look, look, a wild boar!

- What? - There.

It's not a wild boar. They're not even pigs.

- Look, look. - A wild boar.

Grab that.

Heavy stuff, huh?

You found me very quickly.

Pato?

Sorry. It's just, you're really hot.

Will you stop goofing around?

Now you really are Sister Antonia.

- Shall we go up here? - Let's put these on.

Okay.

Fuck, man, that's spooky!

- It suits you. - Go. Go.

- Fuck, what a butt. - Hold that butt. Hold on!

- Let's go. - Let's go.

- Let's go. - I'm going.

You're keen, Sister Antonia.

Have you seen Laura?

She just left.

What's up, Sergio? Come, I have a surprise for you.

Come on, come.

My cousins, Puri and Conchi.

So, what do you think?

From Albacete, cute as hell.

Come on, come.

Good night.

Come on, you want to.

Let's see what Albacete girls are like.

I thought you weren't coming.

I couldn't miss it.

Dani?

- Fuck! - It's Kike, Kike.

Sorry. Have you seen Raquel? No?

Some party, huh?

Sorry. Carry on.

I thought revenge would make me feel good, you know?

But I don't think so.

Kike's an asshole, but I love him.

I mean, I'm the asshole.

You know what? Your generation's men say

they want liberated women, then shit themselves.

Right.

The hetero-patriarchal model has caused a lot of harm. Oh, Daddy!

What are your names?

- José. - José. Oh, José...

What a time you're having.

Cris.

What are you doing here?

Antonio and I sneaked in.

- This is wild, huh? - He came?

Antonio? Yes.

I'm looking for Raquel.

I'm looking for Dani.

Have you seen him?

Yes, he's in the tower.

Don't go.

Raquel has key 3.

Key 3.

I can be fearless too.

This is wild, huh?

Pedro's here.

Really?

- Leave them be. - I'll be right back.

I don't get it, I've always been a very independent woman.

I can't understand how...

Finally.

Honey,

I need to talk to you.

- Is this the asshole? - That's him.

She doesn't want to talk to you.

She wants a man who respects and values her.

- That's right. - Hold on!

I respect her, value her and love her loads.

- Honey, I've been an idiot. - Right.

I wrote an apology, said it was fake information

and I made it all up.

I spoke to the agent of Lidia...

- Torrent. - Torrent.

That show's a hoot.

I convinced her not to sue you.

Honey, I only wanted to show you that...

I can be successful and make money,

- that I can be like you. - What's that?

Did you get the ugliest mask?

- You're an incredible woman. - Sure.

You started a business all alone, and it's a hit.

I feel so small by your side.

What are you doing?

Raquel Domínguez de Ribagorda,

will you marry me?

You never wanted to get married.

But you did.

He's an idiot, but he's my idiot.

I do. I do.

Shall we celebrate?

Come on.

The prostate is the men's G-spot, did you know that?

- Yes. - Yes?

I'm aware of that, yes.

Relax, honey, relax. Breathe, breathe.

You'll see, it'll be great.

What happened?

I think...

...I'm in love with you.

And I am with you.

- Where were you? - And you?

Looking for you.

- Hello. - Hello.

- 20 years. - 20 years.

Brad Pitt's butt.

Were you with Sergio?

Now what?

Now I need to know what I want.

You already know.

It's been 20 beautiful years

and I wouldn't change them for anything in the world.

I love you loads,

but I don't love you anymore.

You understand, don't you?

Hello.

Hello.

Laura, I want to be with you.

I'm going to leave Siena.

Thank you for tonight.

Meeting you again has changed my life,

but I need to know who I am, by myself.

- Raquel Domínguez de Ribagorda. - What?

Are you sure, while there's still time...

No.

...that you want to marry this man?

I'm sure.

Do you, Kike "Stumpy" Tarragona, wish to marry Raquel?

- Sure I do. - The rings, please.

I love you.

León.

By the power vested in me,

I declare you husband and wife. You may kiss.

Bravo!

Long live the bride and groom!

- I love you! - Yes, yes!

- Who do I throw it to? - The fountain, let them get wet.

Go!

Let them get their asses wet.

Are you alright?

- Up you come! - Hurry!

I want to party, everyone up!

- You'll squish me. - No!

THE KEY GAME

You won't kill me, because I won't let you.

- Is that blood? - R1 and L1. It's your blood.

- You hit the X. - Is there one with just two buttons?

- No, hit the X, honey. - This is the X, right?

- Like that. - Hit it.

Don't shout, you'll...

Phase 1, with the possibility of expanding phase 2 by 8%.

We've tried to comply with the client's requisites,

making the project sustainable...

One question. Do the bathrooms have a bidet?

Of course.

Who plays the girl?

I made some chorizo with lentils.

Very nice, but you say lentils with chorizo.

Lentils with chorizo. I spent three hours making it.

Don't throw it so hard.

Delicious. It was Milo.

Wait.

- Great. Cut! - Final clapper.

Fantastic. Done.

Sergio, Melisa, great.

Can we do another one, please?

Sergio, we've run out of time.

- It's fantastic, I loved it. - One.

Really, I don't have time, I can't do any more.

- What's your problem? It's fine. - Why do I kiss her now?

You kiss her because you're in love with her.

The script says it very clearly.

Don't overthink the text.

The subtext isn't in the script, we agree on that.

You're reading one script, I'm reading another.

- I just read the page. - Quiet, please. Thank you.

One more, Vicente, please.

I don't have time for another take.

We've wrapped the movie.

Translation: Lindsay Moxham Subtitles: LASERFILM