Original subtitles

[all] Twenty-eight, twenty-nine, thirty,

thirty-one, thirty-two, thirty-three, thirty-four...

[screams] I yield!

-Pliny wins! -Congratulations!

You get first pick out of this week's box of food...

Again.

How do you do it?

Let me tell you a little secret, Larry.

The eyes want to be wept.

Ooh!

Hey! I see it!

[both] Food's here!

Remember, start chewing now,

so you're warmed up when the food gets in there.

-Of course. -Smart. Okay. Yeah.

[chomping]

[all exclaiming]

[Merian] Uh, excuse me?

-That is our food! -Uh...

-[grunts] -Hey! Stop!

-[struggling] -[Merian] Let go!

[Pliny] Merian, let go.

[Merian] What are you doing?

It was too much spinning.

That was all of our food for the entire week!

Great!

-Now we're gonna starve. -We'll be fine.

[Larry] It's true.

Did you know that bug meat is the food of the future?

Larry, no. Not the bugs again.

I mean, we just need to go back to Dr. Lullah

and ask for another box of food.

[roaring]

[yelling]

Hmm.

[Dr. Lullah] Take your time.

[doorbell rings]

Hi, Dr. Lullah!

[sighs] It's you. What is it?

I'm extremely busy.

Sorry to intrude,

but some mutant stole our rations this week.

So we're just gonna sneak in and grab another box.

Absolutely not.

What? Why?

I deliver one box of food per week in exchange for your help

with my various doomsday devices.

Whatever happens after it's dropped off

is not my responsibility.

Um, sorry, it kind of is

just because you, like, made the mutants.

Uh, yeah.

But unlike you six,

they can take care of themselves.

-Wow. -This is ridiculous.

Just give us some more food.

You have a ton!

Listen, this is the real world,

not summer camp.

It's dog-eat-dog.

And if you want to eat this week,

you're gonna have to go back to that mutant

and fight like a dog for it.

Wow.

Okay, um, so, we don't know how to fight.

I definitely do.

But, uh, ooh, ow, you know, I slept on my wrists weird...

Oh, my God, guys, she's messing with us.

We get it, Dr. Lullah, you're a tough dog,

we're soft babies.

Now, can we please get some more food?

If you want my food,

you're gonna have to go through me.

Challenge accepted.

[struggling]

[Pliny] Fine. You win.

We'll go get our food back from the mutants.

-What? -But what about the box?

Good. Hurry up. Because I am rapidly losing interest.

[Crabclops roars]

I gotta get back to work.

It's just gonna be another tie!

Pliny, how are we gonna beat the mutants in a fight?

Normally, I could kick 'em to pieces,

but without breakfast,

I doubt I'll have the caloric load necessary

to swing the heft of my big heavy leg.

We're going to starve!

It's true.

I wanted to eat this butterfly,

but I just fell in love with it instead.

Aww, that's nice.

[Sara] There's no need to be nervous.

Because good ol' Sara stole one of them big ol' swords.

Who wants to touch it?

[grunts]

Guys!

We're not actually gonna fight the mutants.

We're gonna challenge them to a contest.

Beat their brawn with our brain--

[screaming]

Whoa!

Nice boots.

[spitting]

We're here! I'm gonna ask this cute little sharky dude

if he's seen the gator.

Hello!

We are wondering if you've seen an alligator with a little bird--

-Yoink! [laughs] -Hey!

[shark panting]

-Nice boots. -[gasps]

You!

You stole our food!

And we're here to get it, and ideally my boots, back!

Okay. Hey, mutants.

We gotta fight some kids.

Whoa! No, no, no, no, no!

I mean, we challenge you to a contest.

Winner gets the food.

A contest?

[all murmuring] Contest? Contest! Contest?

I was thinking like holding your breath or rock skipping or...

Prepare the arena!

[♪ dramatic music playing]

[flushing]

[Francis] I found a shell.

-[crowd cheering] -[Merian] I'm confused.

Why did they make us change into these pants?

They're ceremonial contest slacks.

Okay, everybody. You have invoked the sacred law.

So now we will take turns picking contests.

The first team to win three contests gets all the food!

Heads or tails?

-We're heads! -So be it.

Little Pickle?

-[chirping] -Tails!

We choose the first contest.

And the contest we choose is...

push-ups!

[indistinct shouting]

What? Oh, right.

I am... the beefcake.

Hey, can we do the push-ups on our knees?

-Uh... -Yeah, knees is fine.

Oh. Great. Then this will be easy.

-No arms though. -What?

No-arm push-ups!

[crowd cheering]

[bell dings]

We choose book reading!

We choose book ripping!

[crying]

Rock, paper, scissors!

Rock, paper, scissors. Rock.

Rock, paper, scissors. Rock.

Rock, paper, scissors. Rock.

Rock, paper, scissors. Rock.

High wire!

[taunting]

Get him!

[screams]

Gimme back my boots!

Oh, man, I wasn't picking a new contest.

-I just wanted my shoes. -Too late.

Now your boots will be dropped into the jumping geyser.

Whoever can fetch them first, wins the whole bag of nuts.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

What's a jumping gey--

-Oh... No... -Begin!

The eyes want to be wet.

[inhales]

-[all gasp] -[Merian] Pliny!

[Pliny] I'm okay!

[all exclaiming]

And I got the boots!

[all cheering] Yay!

-We win! -Yoink!

Now I got the boots. We win.

Okay. Everybody dig in.

[chomping]

Hey, wait for me.

What-- But-- but you didn't win.

You cheated!

Yeah, but what are you gonna do about it?

[echoes] What are you gonna do about it?

-Not very neighborly. -Um, that is our food!

I'm so hungry.

Dr. Lullah was right.

This is the real world, not school.

The only rule is dog eat dog!

And there's some new dogs in the neighborhood.

-Wait. So are there... -I'm confused.

I'm saying if you're gonna eat this week,

we gotta summon our inner dogs and fight for it!

[all] Oh, okay.

We're the dog-- Got it.

I'm a rat terrier!

Loyal, clever and a little bit naughty.

I'm a Mexican hairless, underappreciated,

and I can make people uncomfortable. Woof!

I'm a mastiff,

a muscle-bound freak

with love to spare.

I'm a dog with a sword, like from anime.

Medium nice dog.

And I'm a porpoise! Dog of the sea!

Because I'm smart, I love games

and I got a blowhole.

[blows raspberry]

[munching continues]

Today was super-fun.

[barking]

[screaming]

Rock, paper, scissors. Rock.

[grunting]

She's too fast! She got no drag!

[dolphin screech]

Taste my blade!

[all screaming and shouting]

[all coughing]

Oh, man!

Now nobody gets the food.

Eh. Okay. Back to sand again.

[mutants] Ugh, sand?

-[chomping] -[coughing]

You guys eat sand?

Yeah, but if you're lucky,

sometimes you can find, like, a soft rock or something.

Oh, dibs!

[coughs]

That was one of the hard ones.

This is making me sad.

And I feel bad for winning that fight

with that frog so decisively.

The mutants are just as hungry as we are.

Except, like, way stupider.

[coughing]

Whoo! The sand is spicy today.

You know, the real world might be dog-eat-dog,

but dogs work best in a pack!

We shouldn't be fighting each other for scraps.

Especially when we know who's hiding all the beef!

[♪ upbeat music playing]

[straining]

[indistinct shouting]

-[indistinct chatter] -[chomping]

[Dr. Lullah] Well, well, well...

It took all day, but we finally got there.

Congratulations.

Another tie!

[roaring]

[♪ closing theme music playing]

Chirp.