Original subtitles

To the JPT 220 Madison, NY Stop President ...

Our commercial director Mr. Enrico Melotti ...

It will arrive tomorrow at 15 hours on flight AZ610. Stop.

We wait for an answer. Stop. Greetings. The secretary, Claudia Parise.

There is the answer. JPT President ...

will be delighted to receive Mister Enrico Melotti ...

morning from 16 to 16:10. Receive a warm greeting.

¡Arturo!

¡Enrico!

¡Al fin!

Here you are, handsome!

Welcome to America!

- You've made a long journey! - Let me see you, friend!

You are rejuvenated! Are you still a latin lover?

You do what you can! I'm better because I've left ...

... to my last wife. - Yes? Will you marry again?

Are you crazy! I already pay the pension to two women: in America they do not forgive!

Are they joking in Italy?

Come on, hurry, because the president expects us at 4 o'clock.

- If we delay, he doesn't receive you. - No?

Outside is the limousine.

Ah, Arturo ... how nice.

- Forgive me, I'm making a call. - Yes, go ahead.

... 3 ... 4 ... 5 ... - There is one in every corner.

Hi Catherine.

How are you dear?

No calls this morning?

No one?

Ok, Catherine. Thank you. Bye.

Arturo, who is this Caterina?

Who? The one who has replaced my wife and the maids ...

The house is run by her, and it is what in Italy they would call ...

... one woman for everything. - Hopefully!

Look Arturo, I brought a little thing from Italy .

A little company gift for the old president: pipes.

- But the old president is gone. You did not know? - No!

- And who is in his place? - A woman ... and I don't think she smokes.

- A woman? - Yes, a 35-year-old girl.

A similar multinational, in the hands of a young woman?

- Yes, young and very pretty. - What is your name?

- Edwinson. - ¿Edwinson... Pamela?

- Yes. - Isn't she that gleaned woman who was in the admission?

Yes, you met her last year when you came here.

- You remember you took her to dinner. - Yes, to dinner ... To bed!

- You will have given him luck ... - Look at you!

That girl unleashed! He didn't let me sleep!

She looked at me with those eyes ... But how did she become president?

- Come. - Yes, I'm curious. - You'll see it.

- Good morning dear. How are you? - Good. And you?

- Mr. Melotti. - Pleasure.

- We have an appointment with the president at 16. - Ok.

Yes, Mr. Melotti has come. Good.

- The President is waiting for you. - Thank you.

- The president is waiting for us. - Should I call her president or Pamela?

- Don't name her, let her speak. - Why? - Bye. - You'll see...

- Come on. Wait a minute, he's on the phone. - Yes, thank you dear.

I have read your reports. I do not like. They have not understood the concept ...

Read it again. Goodbye.

Chairwoman...? Do you know Enrico Melotti? Enrico? Our president.

- We already know each other, remember? - No, I don't remember.

- Did you pretend not to recognize me? - Sure, I told you!

Congratulations, Pamela!

For her appointment as president.

It is something very nice that such an important and highly responsible position ...

attributed to a young woman ...

very intelligent, attractive and very pretty.

I would like to give you all my congratulations ...

... and if you allow me ... - No, I will not!

And since our "time" passes quickly, I want to conclude this business.

The contract, please. Sit down.

- Down! Sit down! - Yes. I hadn't understood ...

Pamela... Oh sorry... Sra. Presidenta, ¿me permite?

I hope you forgive me ...

I have allowed myself to bring him a gift from Italy , but they are ...

... pipes ... - Pipe? Ah, pretty, I like it.

- Susy? - Oh, wonderful and precious pipes!

I know, they are "beautiful pipes" but having known that you were president ...

... I would have brought something else ... - But I like the pipe.

- The pipe? - Yes! - Oh yeah, he loves pipes.

In America all women love the pipe.

In New York it is very fashionable.

- If it's fashionable ... - Give them to me.

- Clear. Here, Pamela. - Thank you.

- He liked them, huh. - You have made her happy.

- Susan? The contract, please. -Yes.

Here. And look here, President. You have to change the first 3 lines.

Well. Okay.

- Enrico, sign the contract. - Clear.

- Italian wine is "very good". I like. - Yes? Thank you.

- Very good Italian wine. - Very good!

- Do you hear, Artù? - Aren't you happy? - I like Italian wine.

Let's see...

As you can see, Enrico, I have corrected some things.

I can see that.

Arturo, he took 2% from me. This one has changed everything.

- President ... I'd like to tell you ... - Arturo, shut up!

- President ... - Shut up, Arturo!

Excuse me, President.

- ¡Enrico! - Eh ...?

- Not well? - Well, no!

- I already agreed with the previous president ... - He's gone!

And we make a price reduction policy

And this is true for all the products that we import from abroad.

- I know ... - And I decide.

And I do not agree.

And since we have run out of time ... How do you say in Rome?

How do you say?

It is said: take it or leave it.

- What do I do, Arturo? - Sign, I'll explain later.

And what are you going to explain to me?

First he pretends not to recognize me , then he steals 2% from me ...

"How they say in Rome ..." Your dead, they say!

- Is married? - Yes, with a good man.

A good man? A poor man!

How does one marry that one? What do you say to him at night? ...

... to a powerful woman like her, President, who makes a billion a year ...

When this man comes home at night, tired, how can he say ...

"What have you done for me for dinner, soup"?

But what soup? You've gone mad?...

This is how women were spoken to 100 years ago.

American women don't even know what soup is.

His social place is no longer at home ...

Today women are powerful because they have proven to be more important ...

... than men, do you understand? -Yes.

Through evolution and emancipation, women ...

... they can be satisfied. - In what sense?

Because they got what they wanted.

- Are you talking about equality? - Equality? They are above!

They have proven to be more capable.

They already send them.

In America, almost all multinationals are run by women.

Very good!

They have positions of great responsibility ...

They have been given huge amounts of money to manage ...

they found banks, they subsidized industries ...

weapons, planes, theater, music ...

commerce, culture, fashion, cinema ...

For example, this year, who has been made president ...

from one of the most important film companies?

- To a woman? - Yes, young and pretty!

Look how they are!

They are beautiful, healthy, strong, tanned ...

¡No!

Stoke what strength!

What hungry mouths they have.

And who stops them? Not for anyone?

- There they go. You see them? - I think so.

How lucky you are, Enrico!

If you only knew how I envy Italian men.

Yes? And because?

I still have in mind the image of the woman of my time ...

when I left Italy. Those wonderful big eyes ...

the glowing smile, those breasts ...

with their blood red coral necklaces ...

But what the fuck do you say? What era are you talking about?

Big eyes, shining smile, corals ...

Come to Italy, you'll see how today's women are.

Why? They've changed?

Sorry, I'm going to phone.

2... 3... 4... 6... 7...

Hi Catherine.

I am Arturo. I'm going home with an Italian friend.

No dear, just for a scotch.

Bye. Thank you. Bye, dear.

- I told him we're going home for a drink. - Yes, I heard.

Every 5 minutes you're calling this Caterina, huh?

- Arturo, just ten minutes. - Do not worry.

- I'm sorry, because this is nice. - A hovel ... that's enough for me.

Henry ...

- Welcome to my simple home. - No, not so simple, Arturo.

- I like it a lot, it's big. - Yes, like your great house in Rome.

Arturo mine, if you only knew how tired.

I have not slept since yesterday. I have a dream that I don't have.

Sit down, it's 10 minutes, for a whiskey and I'll take you to the hotel.

Catherine! Two scotches please, to the garden.

- Enrico, lie down. Are you at home. I will be right back. -Yes.

Oh God!

¡Arturo!

It's a helicopter! But look!

Police!

I thought he was a Martian! Spooky!

¡Scotch!

Thank you!

Thanks a lot!

Have you served the lord, Catherine?

- Thanks a lot. - No problem.

Well, what do you say?

- You like? - What if I like it?

You wanted to know so much about Caterina ... What do you tell me now that you know her?

I don't like these jokes. Who is this Caterina?

Like who? He served you a whiskey, he's a robot.

Yes ... a robot?

- And do you serve whiskey? - She's an artificial maid.

One machine programmed for all domestic services.

By the way: the brochures, translated into all languages.

- Also in Italian? Are these robots also brought to Italy? - Clear.

Do like me. When I lived with my wife and three maids ...

... don't see what a mess I had made. Arguments, fights, disorder ...

Now, with Catherine, I finally live in peace.

You say Caterina would work for a big house like mine?

It is not a question of size. She is a robot, she works day and night.

- Alone, it does the job of 10. - Hopefully!

Imagine that you originally had five service employees. Then 4, 3, 2 ...

... and now I only have Teresa and it is not known how long.

Put it in and buy Catherine. With her you will not have those problems.

General Electronic Robot Corporation...

Who would have imagined it! When you bought it?

Two months ago. Right out of the store ...

I kicked my wife and fired the maids.

- Of course ... 180 thousand dollars. - Oh! - In 26 installments.

165 million lire. Hit what expensive it is!

But if it solves all the problems, it is worth it.

There is.

How pretty!

- What are you doing, iron? - Clear! Wash, iron, starch ... it does everything.

- You like? - And you ask me?

Imagine it in my house!

Clear! Tomorrow before you go, let's book one!

Yes? Is fantastic!

- You like? - I would never tire of looking at her.

But let's go now, it's processing.

I don't want her to be nervous. Come.

- Come on, please. - Excuse me miss. Where we go?

- To the demonstration room. - And what will we see?

The robot is made up of very complex equipment

so it will take a week to get up and running. Follow me

As they did with me. Because you need to know how it works.

I know, but given the price ...

There you have Caterina's head!

Attention, ladies and gentlemen.

The electronic equipment in the robot's brain is made up of 1,600 of these chips.

Each connected to the other

form this complex team

and makes it capable of receiving orders to memorize,

associate and control each movement of Caterina

now I will show you slides to see it better.

It's fantastic! How is it possible that a tiny badge

... contains so many things. - "So many things" ... It's the soul.

Is your Caterina also that complicated?

- The Caterinas are all made the same. - Ya, serial ...

By the way, I'm going to call her. I'll be right back.

Excuse me, engineer. I would like to know

How much electricity does it use?

In 1950 it would have consumed the same electricity as an electric locomotive,

... today the same as 5 batteries. - Excuse my ignorance, but ...

Is this robot able to see and hear?

From a scientific point of view ...

But ask me, Enrico! You know, Caterina go, hey ...

- I wanted to know how much electricity it consumes. - No, little! - And if you see, hey ...

... Did you call her? - Yes, if not, call me at the office ...

... she can't find me, and then anyone can put up with her.

- Does Caterina call you at the office? - Yes, he worries.

You might think a misfortune has happened .

Do you think these Caterinas will replace the hostesses?

Do you ask me? Who has given you that?

The man in the 1st row has brought her from New York.

Here, miss, look.

- Thank you. - He liked it? - It's interesting.

You say that these things will also be sold in Italy ... what are they called?

Caterinas, ma'am, they are robots.

Yes, my dear, even you know what robots are, they are electronic machines ...

You shut up! Who asked you?

- I just wanted to explain .. - Don't interrupt me!

Excuse me, my husband has made me lose the thread ...

Are you saying that these artificial dolls will also be sold in Milan?

Yes, everywhere. It is written in all languages.

They get the addresses of all laboratories and points of sale around the world.

In Italy there are two, in Milan and in Rome.

I was so upset with the Veneto maids,

... those of Sardinia, and then those of the Philippines ... - And who doesn't?

I can't believe that a machine can replace a real woman.

Sorry dear, but if the lord has seen it with his own eyes

... while I was ironing the shirts ... - Why are you talking? Were you there

So why are you talking? Shut up.

- What were we saying? - You said ...

that a machine cannot replace a woman ...

But my friend in America ..

He kicked his wife and maid in the ass ...

and with Caterina he has solved all his problems.

- It is disgusting what you say. - I do not understand what you are saying?

It is unworthy and disgusting and offensive towards women.

If we talk about women, then you are scared.

For millennia we have been blackmailed ...

with the excuse that they feed us and wash the dishes.

Hey! How long with the tale of the two dishes!

And you, gentlemen? They haven't learned to wash a pair of socks in centuries !

- In this you are right. - We don't need you to agree with us.

Excuse me, are you a feminist, by any chance?

- Yes, I run a feminist newspaper. - And I am a deputy in Parliament ...

and I am part of an extraordinary commission for the rights of women.

Excuse me, deputy! Have you seen who I'm arguing with?

- But these discussions are useful. - Who asked you?

Madam, you say you have been a victim with your husband ...

but let him speak at least once.

Women are all the same. My wife doesn't let me talk either.

Shut up! Who has given you permission?

Silence your husband! I am a man, and I want to talk.

- Calle, leave it, it's useless. - Men have talked all their lives ...

now they only have one right: to keep their mouths quiet.

¡Claudia!

Hello Love how are you?

What happened?

In these three days without you I have thought a lot ...

I have to talk to you seriously.

Talk about what?

- Talk! - Well tell me, my love.

- You go to America and I stay here. - Do you want to tell me about America? - No!

- Of our situation. - And what happens to him?

It happens that I'm officially your secretary ...

in public we are about you ...

I often stay in the office at night to work with you until 10, 11.

and instead of paying me overtime, you take me to bed ...

in more or less clandestine hotels.

- It's not like that? - In a sense yes, but ...

- What do you mean? - Then, at 3 in the morning ...

we get out of bed because you must go back to your wife ...

... and maybe you even make love to her. - No. You know that for a long time

... I no longer have intimate relationships with Marisa. - Anyway...

Officially she is your wife ...

And despite the promises, you have not been able to leave her, so ...

Either you clarify your position or I leave you.

- Look, my darling ... - Don't call me that! - Dear...

I have also thought a lot and now I have very clear ideas.

You've been saying it for years.

Excuse me, Claudia. I will hurry.

I'm back in five minutes.

-Excuse me, where is Marisa? I am her husband. - In the little room upstairs.

- In the living room? -Yes.

- Excuse me, do you know where the living room is? - Over there.

- Come on ... Shoot! - Sorry, is this the living room?

- Push ... push. - Sorry! - Oh, but who are you?

Good Morning!

It comes to my hands and I didn't understand ...

I did not know that you had so much initiative ...

And I am not, if you had not encouraged me ...

- I was looking for the living room. Where is? - Over there. Are you looking for your wife?

- Yes, unfortunately. - What unfortunately?

No, I meant it to say.

- If one day we meet ... - Miss, are you going to leave me here?

These have been broken. No size for me?

- I'm going to find her. - Very well.

Excuse my initiative, I hope to see you again soon.

Wait, where are you going?

- I don't know if you can get in. - Why?

What happens?

-You decide. - That's why you can't enter the private room!

Look, this is my husband.

- Hi, I'm Vincenzo. - Enrico Melotti, nice to meet you.

Well Marisa, I'm going.

Yes, Vincenzino,

... are you coming to pick me up at the same time? - Yes, I'm coming to pick you up, don't worry.

- Bye. - OKAY. - Bye, Enrico, see you.

- Bye, I don't think so. - What have you come here for?

Sorry Marisa, if it was a daring.

But what an apology! I forbade you to come to my store.

This is my private space that I conquered with effort

in which you should not enter.

Very good, congratulations! You have set up your private space well

maybe I'm naive but I believed ...

that you would like a husband who returns from America

come to greet the wife.

No, you have come to control me, to see Vincenzino.

Because you always want to meddle in everything.

- Included in my private things. - Bah, as a husband ...

I have every right to know what those private things are.

- Who is this Vincenzino. Who? - "Who!"

- He's just a friend. - What do you mean friend? Speak clear.

Are you sleeping with Vincenzino or not?

Oh, what is this sudden interest about?

What has happened to you?

Nothing in particular. I just want to know.

Because according to you, is our situation clear?

Our situation is quite clear.

I have been faithful to you for 25 years.

And even today, despite everything, despite my new friends ...

I am still unable to deceive you. Imagine how stupid!

However you ... friends, friends, lovers ...

... secretary ... No, you were the one who had fun.

And how! So it is you who should explain your position and not me.

Listen Marisa, if you had continued taking care of the house,

of housework, of my person,

instead of opening this unisex store

Maybe I wouldn't have tried to console myself with those little friends.

- There it is! - But what a scoundrel!

If I have opened this store

It is fair because I already knew for a long time that you console yourself with your friends.

And with your permission, I was fed up!

Listen Marisa, this is not the right place to talk about these things.

- See you tonight at home. - No, it's useless to wait for me tonight,

because I'll be late. I'm going to have dinner with friends.

Do not worry dear. I'm dead tired, but I'll wait for you.

Tonight we have to talk.

Clarify point by point.

It is understood?

Yes I understand. I've been understanding you for a long time!

You are vile!

You will never have the courage to break up with your wife

to clarify your situation, and do you know why?

Because you're fine like this: a wife who makes you a mother ...

a secretary you enjoy as a lover, a maid who irons ... why change?

Holy Virgin! Why do you all take it with me?

You are unfair! I do nothing but think of you every minute ...

What do I have to do to prove it to you?

I need your help and understanding, I am exhausted!

I left New York last night!

¡Tengo "jet lag"!

I haven't slept for two nights!

I love you, you can't attack me like that, I don't deserve it!

Claudia...

A little gift for you.

What is it?

A detail from New York. With all my love!

Thank you.

A little kiss?

Goodbye.

Think about what I have told you.

Stay calm, dear.

- Teresa, it's me! - I open!

- Teresa! Teresa! - Welcome Sir.

Yes, welcome ... take the bags, right?

Now raise your voice?

What if I raise my voice?

What is your fault?

Teresa of mine, I raise my voice for other reasons.

Sorry if I raised my voice to you.

But I arrive exhausted from America ...

and the secretary attacks me and makes a scene for me.

I go to my wife's store

and rushes over me

and accuses me of a lifetime

Like I'm guilty of who knows what crimes

It can not go on like this. One becomes neurasthenic.

Calm down, make you feel bad.

I do feel bad!

I feel bad.

If you only knew how many things I have to do that make me feel bad.

Look, Teresa ...

Once you lived in a two-room house :

me, my wife and two children.

And if you only knew, dear Teresa, we were all happy.

And it was nice to arrive after a long journey ... Bring me the slippers.

... and see them waiting for you, smiling ...

the table set, the fresh flowers, the steaming soup ...

from the kitchen came the smell of the sauces that my wife cooked with her hands ...

And they wanted a big house!

And I bought it: pretty, comfortable ...

That's exactly what women don't want : the big house.

Sure, so women no longer want to do housework.

- Who told you to buy such a big house ? - What do I know!

Had I known, I would not have bought it.

Hey Teresa, since I'm alone for dinner ...

make me something light ...

a hot, a Milanese cutlet ...

good, crispy, they don't know how to make it in America!

Yes, I know, and I do it well, but it's my day off, and I'm leaving.

How are you leaving? Make an exception!

- Half an hour, you can't refuse! - Can't I refuse?

- No! - Who says? I am like a civil servant: Thursdays and Sundays, book.

You can go? What if I tell you that I'm fed up?

That I give you the eight days and kick you out of the house with a kick in the ass?

First of all, you do not kick me because before I go ...

and also, to see where he finds another like me.

Other? What if I told you that in America they have invented a robot that works better!

- Go to the priest to cry. - Sir, America feels bad.

- Get out there ... - Yes, you'll see.

We will see you happy! And very soon!

- My lady ... - What happened, Teresa?

- If I knew what the man has messed up in the kitchen ... - What?

Now he is sleeping in front of the TV.

- He told me he's going to kick me out. - Ok, let's talk tomorrow. Thank you.

- Enrico! Enrico! - No...!

What are you doing still up?

- You're back, dear ... - Yes ...

- I been waiting for you. - I can see that.

- Ah ... scarlet roses? - Yes friends...

- Friends? But what time is it? - It's almost two o'clock, go to bed.

Marisa...

I went straight from the airport to your store to greet you and you ...

... you treated me like a stranger. - No, it's you who behaves like this.

You went to greet me and you were accompanied with your lover.

With my secretary!

If there was a moment of weakness between that girl and me ...

it is past water.

Now it is only a labor relationship. That's it.

What's more, I tell you:

I'm starting to feel bad.

But what will you have in that big head

I wonder if you 've ever had a moment of coherence in your life.

¡Marisa!

God only knows how unfair I've been to you

but you are the only important person in my life.

And I want to do whatever it takes to reconcile with you.

But how am I to believe you? What did you do for me to be able to believe you?

Here it is. Yesterday in New York I bought you a gift ...

A little thing that I saw a president of a multinational.

It's a nothing thing but you will appreciate it because I bought it with all the love.

Look. Opens.

Open up, Marisa!

Oh God!

My virgin!

Little Virgin ... What have I done?

Marisa? What happened?

But how is it possible to get to this point?

Sorry, Marisa ... but maybe it's a mistake ...

A mistake?

You bought it for your secretary!

¡No!

Marisa dear, I bought it for you.

- "Claudia, my dear ... - There it is! ... this little gift is not a big deal" ...

"... but it is the detail of a great love. You are the only woman in my life."

Yes, I'll be an idiot! I've got the wrong box!

- I gave your gift to her. - You worry about that!

... of the reaction your lover will have! He does not think of his wife,

whom he has offended with the most shameful lie ! What a humiliation!

- Who have I lived with for 25 years! - Marisa, listen to me!

- What happens? - If I lied to you ...

it's because I'm too good, I didn't want to hurt you.

That's enough!

Enough? Well enough be it!

Enough I say it! I can't take this relationship anymore!

I feel strangled! I need my space, my freedom!

I don't want to depend on you or the maid ...

neither from the secretary, nor from other women!

I want to live alone! I don't want anyone else in my house!

... "shameful lie" ...

- Who? - Who will it be? I!

- Marisa, what are you doing, go out? Won't you go to bed? - No.

Well, sit down. Please.

And thanks for coming to see me. Sit down.

Enrico, I need to understand ... I've never heard you speak like this. What happened to you there?

Listen, Marisa ... I know I made a lot of mistakes with you ...

including tonight's ... I shit the bitch!

- But it's not just my fault! - No? And whose is it?

Whose? You think it is fair...

that I give you a house like that and no one enjoy it?

Two children who are going to live alone ... And the wife? Not even her!

- It leaves at 8 in the morning and returns at 2 at night! - Good and?

- Do you want me to tell you? - Yes, tell me!

- I want to try again with you. - Let's hear it!

Or you leave your unisex business, your friends ...

and that shortcut of vipers from your feminist friends and you start living like a wife ...

And when I come home from work at night I will find you cooking dinner ...

or you leave my house, I'll find someone else to rule this house.

- Now I understand. - What do you understand?

You will have found another. Maybe in America.

What I've found in America is my business.

- The ways of the Lord are infinite! - It's okay, Enrico!

This is your beautiful house, and I will leave it to you.

- I have a little apartment above the store, I don't need anyone. - Best!

I'm going. I let you live with whoever you want.

- Great, get out. - Yes, I'm leaving.

- And I even wish you the best. - Thank you. - You and that poor thing ...

... you still don't know what to expect. - I know!

- I'm curious how it will end. - I'll write you!

- Goodbye. - Goodbye dear.

- Bye, love, bye, pretty, close the door. - Yes, good luck.

It is gone? Hala, another thing done!

Have they finished taking my wife's furniture?

Yes sir. Only this sofa remains.

No, not the lamp I carry. It is safer. It's from the lady.

Teresa? So what have you decided? What will you do?

I leave the house in order and I go with the lady.

You do well, Teresa. I'm glad.

Imagine me!

I'm here! I'm going dear, wait for me!

¡Claudia!

¡Claudia!

- Good morning sir, welcome back. - Thank you dear.

¡Claudia!

Claudia...

- I have great news. - You scoundrel!

"My dear little woman" ...

"accept this little gift with all my love" ...

"and that you know that you are the only woman in my life" ...

"And the others have been nothing more than stupid and insane evasions."

Did you understand what happened, dear?

I got my card wrong!

Yes I understood! For you I have been a stupid adventure.

It is done!

Claudia...

Claudia...

Mr. Melotti, how are you?

How am I?

Miss, call me in New York: 7807891 ...

General Electronic Robot Corporation...

Call engineer Rubens.

GERC...

The mail and the contracts of the consortium.

¡Claudia!

Claudia...

Girl, why are you doing this?

Do not do a tragedy for a foolish thing. Don't give importance to the card ...

...are words. What counts are the facts.

What facts?

My wife has left me: Marisa has gone to live alone.

And do you know what I did this morning? I've fired the maid.

- The maid? -Yes.

And what do I have to do?

This...

I am free!

- And you can finally come live with me. - And do I have to leave the office?

Not because? You can keep working for me.

It is enough that at night, you leave an hour before ...

go home and prepare everything; a hot bath,

... an aperitif, a good dinner ... - And then I wash the dishes,

laundry, iron ... And so you, with a single salary,

you have a lover, a secretary and a maid.

Do not worry dear. Being my wife and living with me,

I don't think it's in good taste to pay you a salary.

Fuck off! Who have you taken me for?

It's over with me, and if you need a slave, look elsewhere!

Oh yeah? Do you think so?

- You think you are indispensable, right? - We are fired.

Can you tell me where I'll find a substitute?

It's done, found!

- Where do we put it? - Here, in his utility room.

- Slow down, guys ... - Don't worry.

Be careful with the stairs.

So. Slowly...

Engineer, this is your room, come on.

Come on. Bring it here.

I've freed this wall, let's put it here.

- Mr. Melotti, you have to sign the letters. - Yes, in my study.

- Come with me. - It's okay.

Ah! Hi Catherine!

Darling, how are you today?

I'm glad to see you so well.

Yes ... Pretty!

Well, now I'll give you a checkup.

1... 2...

One...

... two ... - Thank you.

Thank you...

- 159... - 159...

... and 160 million. There is more?

No, you have already signed the insurance policy ...

- What does it say? - That the engineer is ready.

Really? Let's go!

- Here I am, engineer. What happens? - Go? It is already assembled.

- What do you think? - Splendid.

Now we can move on to "imprinting".

Yes...

- Excuse me ... what is that? - It's the meeting with the chick ...

Fresh from the egg, the first animal he sees ...

... causes an "imprinting" in the chick. - Ah! An impression? - Yes, exactly.

Exactly what will happen to the robot, to Caterina. Excuse me but...

If you don't see the animal, but me, is it the same?

- You are an animal. - Yes. - And when Caterina sees him ...

... will stay with you for life. - Forever!

See this record? Stand here with your feet together.

- So? - No, like this, straight, with your back straight.

Still. Look her straight in the eye.

And what will happen to me?

In 30 seconds Caterina will open her eyes ...

and through its light the first person it will see will be you.

- Like the chick? - Exactly. Sorry...

you stay here, I'll close the curtains ...

because the room has to be dark.

- You don't move. -Yes.

- And I looked Caterina in the eyes. -Yes.

Oh god what's up Engineer...

What happen?

- Calle, don't talk. - Yes ...

- Ready, Mr. Melotti: it's over. - It's over? Wonderful!

Really exciting!

Excuse me, but ... where does your voice come from?

She talks and listens with this headband: it is a very sophisticated mechanism.

Never raise your voice with Caterina, if not, you will be blocked.

- No, I'll be nice to her. - This is your wardrobe ...

- Ah! Great! The apron ... - Yes, but let's leave her alone, that's how she processes.

Excuse me, engineer, when are you going to start doing housework?

- Be patient, I'll explain. - Yes ...

The first hour will be immobile ...

Then, little by little, it will begin to move around the house and around the garden.

In a week you will be autonomous and can start with the simplest tasks.

- Can I be calm? - Clear! If you have difficulties, give us a call!

- Good bye! - Good bye! Thank you!

Oh God!

¡Caterina!

¡Caterina!

Have you already left your cabin, dear?

Yes sir...

- Well ... but do you talk? - Yes sir...

Do you recognize me Do you remember me?

Yes sir. Caterina remembers.

- Who I am? - My employer.

Very good, Caterina!

Your lights have come on, are you processing?

Don't get tired, my dear.

It is night and your employer is going to sleep.

See you tomorrow, Caterina, good night.

- Goodnight Mr. - Good night dear.

Pretty little virgin!

Yes sir ... Yes sir ...

"My employer ... my employer ..."

Yes sir...

So!

How beautiful, Caterina!

How nice you are with the luxury maid cap !

- There is another Caterina at home. - No, it's you reflected in the mirror.

- That's another Caterina. - Do you know that you are stubborn?

Be patient, you will understand little by little.

See this dirty plate? Now I'll show you how to wash it.

- ... Let's wash it ... - You take the brush ...

... you put the dirty plate in the water and rub. - ... Caterina rubs ...

Again, Caterina!

Do you see that you have already learned? Now enough ...

- You will wash all these. - Yes sir.

Women say it's very heavy: for me, it's a fun game ...

interesting and very useful. Do you like it?

- Caterina likes ... - Sure! Because you are better than the others.

We await your kind reply ... for game 27

already issued on the 15th of last year.

Miss Claudia!

- Yes, Director? - Where is Mr. Melotti?

You have asked for permission for personal reasons.

Try to know what those personal reasons are .

Yes, Director, I will call you.

- Say, who is it? - Hey, hey.

- This is Mr. Melotti's house. - I am your secretary, who are you?

This is Caterina.

Caterina, the director wants to hear from Mr. Melotti.

Caterina does not give news.

I can talk with him?

No, Mr. Melotti doesn't want to be disturbed.

- Okay I understand. Infinite thanks. - Infinite of nothing.

- Caterina! - Yes sir?

Tell me dear, why do you always put the same record?

Because it's the first the boss made me listen to: Caterina likes it.

- You're right, I like it too. - Scotch, sir? - Thank you.

- On the rocks? - Yes, on the rocks!

How nice!

It is a waltz. It's the phone. You answer, Caterina.

House of Mr. Melotti. This is Caterina.

- Who is it, dear? - He says she's his wife.

- It doesn't "say" ... it's my wife. - Does the gentleman want anything else?

- No, go to the kitchen to wash the dishes. - I'm coming, sir.

- Yes? Is it you, Marisa? - If I bother you?

- No hassle, I'm glad to hear you. - How are you?

I must honestly tell you that I am feeling very well.

- Who has answered the phone? - It's Caterina!

- I would like to meet this person who makes you so happy. -Yes.

- I'll be happy to introduce it to you. - Shall I stop by tomorrow for a snack?

- With pleasure, come. Then we have dinner together? - No, tomorrow night I have dinner with friends.

- I'll just drop by to greet you. - Well, whatever you want. I'll wait for you from 8 o'clock.

- In agreement. See you tomorrow. - Yes bye.

Come, come ... oh, what ...

There is.

Let me go, I know who it is. Is my wife.

- Hi! - Hello, Marisa, how are you? - I dont complain.

I just got home, I'm already at the table.

- Are you really not staying for dinner? - No, Enrico, I can't.

- Luciana invited me to dinner. - Sit down!

- I've come to greet you. - Yes ...

... already control how I live, huh? - No! I see that you live very well!

- If there are even fresh flowers. - Yes, my dear, flowers and music.

Caterina never makes me miss them!

- You are happy? - Let's say I'm lucky.

Yes! Today it is difficult to find a woman who ...

... kneel before the man to put the slippers on him. - You've seen me?

The things that surprise you are completely natural to her.

Even my grandmother did the same.

When my grandfather came home from work ...

she knelt to put the slippers on ...

without feeling humiliated.

- Well ... you look a lot like your grandfather. - Yes?

What do I look like ...?

Ah! Very good, Caterina! The tortellini were very good!

Thank my Lord. Do you have something, Marisa?

- Yes ... - What do you want?

What you want!

Caterina, bring a glass, the lady will have some wine with me.

- Immediately Mr. - Thank you dear.

Oh my gosh, how scary! But what was that?

Why do you say that"?

She is a mechanical woman, a robot built for housework.

That was your mystery of your return from America!

- You had an ace up your sleeve to say that you would get someone. -Yes.

White or red?

White, red ... whatever you want my dear ...

Go away, Caterina, I already add the wine to the lady. Go away.

You have darling, baby.

You have finally achieved your goal.

You have finally found your ideal woman: the object woman.

- I have to tell you that I have never been so happy. - Happy?

How can you be happy living with a robot?

With a machine without a soul, without interests ...

That is precisely the beauty of our relationship!

Since Caterina has been in this house ...

there are no more arguments, as there were with you and the maid

I just tell her what I need, and Caterina does it to me ...

...without discussion. Without feeling humiliated, frustrated ...

Hear what peace, what silence.

- Can you hear it? -Yes.

- It's her? - Yes ...

Well ... you still have practice ...

I think so! Now I'm going ...

... I don't want to steal more time from your love affair with her.

- No, why are you leaving? - Because it seems like an ignoble choice.

But if this was what you wanted, for me, great.

Happy you, happy everyone!

- Thanks for the visit. - Goodbye and my wishes. - Goodbye.

Goodbye, Marisa, don't be angry. I'll go see you.

Goodbye!

Innoble, ¿eh?

Caterina, but what happened? There was a roar!

What have you done? Look!

O holy Virgin! You have broken everything!

Did the dishes fall on you? Darling ... did they slip from you?

Caterina wanted to break the dishes!

Ah! Very well! And because?

- Caterina, very alone in the kitchen. - But, What are you telling me?

What do you mean "very lonely"?

Caterina likes to be with the boss!

I know, you had the "imprinting" ...

you've processed like chick, but ...

You are still a machine, you cannot always be with me.

- Caterina wants to be with her employer. - Yes, do what you want!

Clean everything and collect, I'm done. I'm going to have a whiskey.

What are you doing, do you sit down? Don't you pick up?

- Caterina watches TV and then picks up. - What do you mean "later"?

You have a lot to do: ironing, cleaning the kitchen ...

Be serious!

Caterina works all night, but first watch the serial.

You're right, you can work at night too ... Let's watch TV together.

- Is it intriguing? - Yes ...

Let me explain ... do you see that one with the red scarf?

He is a spy. And the one who arrives with his wife ...

... it doesn't look like it but he's a spy - No, it is not true: it is the cousin.

- No, he's a spy! - No, it's the cousin.

But hey! If I tell you, believe me!

Do you know that you are getting presumptuous? He's a spy!

Look who has come ... Oscar! Dear cousin ... Hello.

Is it the cousin?

It's true, you're right.

It's the cousin.

- How did you know? - Caterina has seen the other chapters.

- Very well! Do you watch TV without me? - Yes sir, day and night.

It is true that this television does not let anyone sleep.

What do you do?

- As? - You do not play? Play!

Wait, let me think!

- Gin! - That's not fair!

Don't we play anymore?

For what? If you always win!

It is better to go to sleep.

What time is it?

¡Caterina!

Good morning sir.

- What are you doing, dancing? - Yes sir!

You dance well, Caterina.

Thank my Lord!

- And where have you learned to dance? - With the TV.

Notice!

Here, dear!

Here.

Wait a bit ...

Sorry!

A bold gesture, but he was sure.

- Are you ... Good morning! - Good Morning!

- How did you recognize me? - Is not difficult...

Change the background color ... but the shape is always the same.

I was very nervous: I was reaching for my bags.

How come I haven't seen her again at Marisa's store?

- I quit to be a model. - Good! With his body ...

- That's why I'm no longer a model. - No?

I got tired of seeing my body as an object of consumption.

I do not deny it: the body is the body.

What will you do today?

- I want to go to the sea! - Sea? I thought I was going to a rodeo.

¡Cowboy!

The loop!

No, I was going to the sea.

Unfortunately, my car wo n't start .

So I'm going home.

I live here with a friend.

But why miss a day on vacation?

Why don't you come to my house to sunbathe?

We will be in the garden: we will play ping pong, ball ...

We will have a good breakfast and have a wonderful day together.

- Would you like it? - Haunted...

But suddenly? I don't want to disturb ... You won't be home alone, will you?

Yes Dear. Completely alone.

- As you can see, I even take care of making the purchase ... - Already ...

- Since now his wife is not ... - Neither wife nor maid!

- And how to do, who takes care of the house? - Caterina takes care.

Caterina .. And who is this Caterina?

Come on dear ... get in the car. I'll tell you everything on the way.

I will tell you what has come on my last trip to America.

I have discovered something worth seeing.

- Do you accept a modest floral detail? - How beautiful!

Yes, but nothing compared to a flower like you.

Here is my earthly paradise . You like?

- How nice! - Do you like the garden?

- Splendid. How much green! - Thank you dear.

Those trees are gigantic.

They are exotic plants that I have brought from South America.

Look, turn around.

There is Caterina. Is coming.

There is.

- Is beautiful! - Yes ...

It looks like a real woman!

Incredible!

It makes a bit of an impression ... it has something human.

Why are you looking at me like that?

Because it is a robot: it does not know you and is processing.

He may be wondering who you are. I will introduce you.

¡Caterina!

We have a guest: say hello to this beautiful lady.

- Good morning, ma'am. - Good morning, Caterina.

Come dear, let's change.

Let's go! Ping pong.

Ready?

Do you have the palette?

It's mine!

Go dear, go.

The ball!

But where has the ball gone?

Look for the ball ...

What a scare!

I am a man of the jungle. I am Tarzan!

Ah dear, am I scared of you?

I'm strong. I cling to you like a snake.

- More ping pong? - I am not tired.

Ping pong reminds me of when I used to play with Dad when I was little.

...With Dad!

Where were you born, my dear? Paris, Versailles, Bordeaux ...?

- In Argelia. - In Argelia?

- Are you Algerian? But no! - But yes! - But no! - But yes!

- What a beautiful voice you have. - Really honey?

Thank you.

It's a miracle, my dear. My leopard!

My beast ...

Eat me!

What?

Good, Caterina.

Darling, do you dig?

- Have a drink, dear. - Thank you! I'm a little flustered.

... I would like to take a shower. - I accompany you.

- No need, I know the house well. - Do you know her?

It's in our room ... sorry ... in my room.

Nice melody ...

The waltz is always suggestive ...

is romantic...

... and I like to dance by candlelight ...

Sweetie, I like it too ...

It will be our melody, which will seal this romantic night.

Thanks, Caterina.

- I also like to dance this one. - Yes Dear.

I'd dance with you my whole life, but I have to give up.

¡Paz!

- Do you want cava? - A little finger.

Ten.

The cava!

Too...

Laughing!

Do you give up too? Don't you dance anymore, dear?

- I don't like dancing alone ... - But I'm by your side ...

- I feel good with you. - Yes?

Elizabeth! But what is that "you"?

Call me Enrico!

Trust me.

I'm a simple man, you know

... who has not lost the taste of small joys ...

as long as they are as beautiful ... as you.

Chin...

Oh! What an erotic image!

Elizabeth...

... Regret, hug me.

I don't know if I'll be able to give up my shyness with you ...

"But yes honey!" ¡Abandon you shy!

Let's go!

- Bring your fleshy lip to mine, and I will be seduced. - No!

- What happens? Do you reject me, my dear? - No, but look who is.

Caterina! Can't you ask for permission when you arrive?

- The coffee, sir! - Ah, the coffee! Thank you!

Caterina, are you nervous?

- No sir. - Good, go.

Do all the tasks, put everything in order.

- Soon the lady and I will go to sleep. - Yes sir.

- How weird ... - What's so weird about it?

I think he wanted to surprise us!

No, my dear, it is an impression. Go to sleep?

Let's go.

Time does not promise anything good.

¡Caterina!

Caterina, close doors and windows, the end of the world is coming soon.

- Do you love me, Elizabeth? - I love you, Enrico.

Wonderful! I am a free man!

And if you wanted to, you could come live here with me forever.

- Here? Forever? - Clear!

A big house, all the comforts ... Caterina does all the housework ...

- You would be my queen! - Yes, but Caterina makes me feel uncomfortable.

With those eyes ... when he looks at me he scares me!

Fear? But it is a robot!

Here I am, dear.

What immense joy!

¡Elizabeth!

¡Elizabeth!

Love!

Why are you screaming my dear? Has it scared you?

Well yes, this is a naked man.

Don't be afraid, I won't hurt you.

But what do you think? What is the first time I see a naked man?

So why are you screaming?

Caterina was spying on us! He glared at me!

But darling ... It's the storm!

Caterina is a good, obedient machine ...

I told him to do his homework ...

... and now it will be in the kitchen ... I shit my milk!

¡Me ha tirado un plato a la cara! ¡Caterina! ¡Caterina!

- But what are you doing? - What had he told you? It's dangerous.

Yes, you told me, but who could imagine.

- There she is, look at her! - Caterina!

Your good and obedient machine is destroying your house!

Caterina, what is wrong with you?

Watch out, Enrico, she's dangerous!

Caterina, but what happens?

You're destroying my house! Even the power has gone out!

But what happens?

- Elizabeth? - Enrico, I'm scared!

Calm down, Caterina! Be good!

- It's not possible! Caterì! - Enrico? Do something!

And what am I going to do? This one is missing a screw!

- I'm scared, I'm leaving! - No dont go!

Don't go, Elizabeth!

Radio taxi? Viale Atlantico 127 ... come quickly!

Where are you, Caterina?

Where are you my darling?

It's me, your boss!

But why have you done all this?

Maybe it's something you haven't understood ...

Have you been offended?

Cater...

Oh God! Oh my!

Did you see what you have at home?

- Oh God, what a tremendous attack! - But what a robot, is a murderer!

- I'm leaving. - But it's not my fault.

Who could foresee it? He stabbed me!

- It's okay for you! I had told you! - How is it okay for me?

No! Don't leave me, don't leave me!

- I'm leaving, and I won't come back. - But what are you, drugged?

But how drugged! Get out to fuck and take me home fast!

Do not go! Do not leave me alone!

No...

Go fuck yourself too! The same thing happens with all of them.

There is.

Ah! Now that it's gone you turn on, huh?

But why did you do it?

What happened to you?

Their deaths ...

My Virgin ... But what have you done?

What have you got ...?

Caterina! Do you realize what you've done?

You've ruined this pretty house!

Have you seen what you have done?

- Caterina has seen. - Yes? And does it look nice to you?

Do you know that you have done a lot of damage to the boss?

- Caterina wanted to hurt. - I think so!

You stabbed me!

Look what you've done to me. Do you know that you could have killed me?

- Caterina wanted to kill! - Yes?

Well!

And where have you learned these ugly things?

- With TV. - ¡Ah!

Well ... some cable is not working.

Your mechanism does not work! Come, let me explain!

- What do you get me? - It is better to disinfect. - Good!

First you kill me and then you want to cure me?

Thanks, nice detail.

Do you see that when you want you are smart?

Oye, Caterina...

If I buy a car ... Atiza, see what cut.

I buy a car and I am the owner, and it is always with me.

He accompanies me to the office, for a walk ...

I put it in the garage, it takes home who I want ...

And the car doesn't call me and say: "I feel alone"!

He doesn't even stab me because I'm with a woman! It's a car!

- Caterina is not a car. - I know!

And about that, we have to talk very seriously.

I admit you have a let's say mechanically perfect brain ...

very sophisticated, with millions of cells that process everything ...

But just because I start talking to you ...

that you are an object ... it's not normal!

- Caterina is not an object! - I'm not an object! - That!

Caterina is not an object ...

Says it's not an object ...

How did you say?

Repeat...

I repeat ... I am not an object.

I?

But how? If you always spoke in the third person ...

- And now you tell me "I"? - Yes!

I say "I" because I exist.

I exist?

On what do you base to say that you exist?

I love.

- I love? - Yes, I love, therefore I exist.

O holy Virgin! Who would expect it!

Listen Caterina, I forbid you to speak like that!

I do not allow you...

Oh God, that crashes. The engineer had said so.

A little patience, Caterina ...

and your brain will work.

The crown, please.

Thank you!

So!

Wonderful! Now it seems to work perfectly.

Very good very good!

Are you looking at us?

Yes!

- He has opened his eyes! - I have worked at NASA

with super-sophisticated electronic brains .

- I didn't know ... - But what happens to me with this one ...

it had never been verified.

Caterina, can you hear me?

Yes sir!

Will you obey your boss's orders always and without discussion?

Yes sir.

Do you agree that you have no rights over his life ...

... and who can bring another woman home?

He realizes? The whore daughter ...

If you repeat what you did last night, I take the current ...

... I put you in a box and send you to America. It is understood?

I repeat the question ...

Do you accept that you bring another woman? A normal flesh and blood ...?

- Yes sir. - Good.

Get up, and go to the kitchen.

- No, she goes alone. - Yes?

Obey, Caterina.

- Bravo, thank you engineer. - You're welcome, that's why we are here.

- I can see that! - Caterina, do your duty. Pick up the broken plates ...

... and do what you are programmed to do. - Yes sir.

It has returned to being completely normal.

Yes, I see it. But what if the chaos from last night returned?

In that case, call my company ...

who will take the robot and give you the money back.

- Insurance? -Yes.

- Did you hear, Caterina? - Yes, sir, Caterina will.

- There, your machine works. - Bye.

- You will see that you will not have more complications. - Let's hope! If not, can I call you?

- Always available. - Infinite thanks. Bye.

Who would have imagined such a joke.

They are electronic machines, sophisticated ...

you have to be an electronic engineer to understand them.

They obey them because ...

The mother who gave birth to her!

But look. Caterina?

Have you sat on the couch?

- Don't you do your homework? - No, I do not want.

You do not feel like?

Have you already forgotten about the promises you made to the engineer?

- You blackmailed them. - Yes?

- Call the engineer, huh! - Call it.

Clear! He's sending you to America! Engineer!

- Come on, something serious has happened. - What?

Caterina has sat on the couch and says we have blackmailed her.

- Impossible! - How impossible?

- If she does that, we send her to America. - I told him. Here it is.

- There is! -Yes.

- What does it say? - What do I say? It was here!

He was no longer working, now he has returned to work because I called you.

- Did you realize the trick? - But what trick? Do not overdo it!

- It's the truth, engineer. - I say it's perfectly normal.

- Yes, normal ... - Doesn't it work?

- Yes, but now ... - Don't waste my time.

- My wife was better! - I am a technician ...

... not a sociologist. - And the guarantee?

The guarantee is for when it shows that Caterina is not working.

Which now you cannot prove.

- Be good to her, and she will do her duty. - What a scam!

Be good, he says. I behave well, is she ...

There it is, do you see it?

Very well, Caterina: you have sat down again.

- Call the engineer. - I don't call anyone anymore ...

I already know the trick. It's no use. You have won. What do you want me to say?

I am already in your hands ... of a robot, of a machine.

I shit the bitch!

If I find out!

- Hello? - I'm Susie. - What Susie?

The president's secretary. You do not remember me?

Sure, dear! "My darling", what a joy to hear you.

How is our pretty president? Are you in New York?

No, I'm at the airport.

Are you in Rome? Thanks for calling. I hope we see each other soon.

In the morning I leave home early , you can call me at the office.

You will find me at any time. If not, I'll find you. Where are you staying?

- No hotels. All busy with the visit to the Pope. - I know...

With this Pope there is always trouble in Rome. It is full of pilgrims.

- Where will you sleep tonight? - In your house.

Yes. You in New York told me: "If you go to Rome, come and sleep at my house."

- Sure, I remember it very well. - Then I'll be right away.

No! No! Not at my house, accountant!

Don't you dare come because I don't receive anyone at my house!

"Hello?" I'm Susie, what do you say?

I say accountant, if you dare to come, I'll throw you to the dogs.

That is why you better not try.

- Hey? I don't understand ... - You can't understand, accountant ...

These things I can no longer treat at home!

Call me at the office tomorrow! If not, we will both have problems.

It is understood?

What's up, Caterina?

- Dinner is served. - Good!

I'll be right away.

Translation: Vozidar www.cine-clasico.com