Original subtitles

[theme music]

NARRATOR: "Gunsmoke," with Milburn Stone as Doc, Amanda

Blake as Kitty, Ken Curtis as Festus,

Buck Taylor as Newly, and starring

James Arness as Matt Dillon.

[music playing]

I shot one of 'em.

Newly, Burke, get your horses.

The rest of you, saddle up.

Let's get after 'em.

[music playing]

You ain't gonna make it, boy.

He won't last a day.

Move away.

Now, the money, put it in the saddle bag.

[music playing]

[woman singing in distance]

Hey.

Hey, you on the ground there.

You drunk or hurt or what?

Both, maybe.

Oh, sore meat.

No sir, not me.

Oh.

Lord, did you ever see a fool?

[music playing]

Any particular reason?

Fool had a gun hidden there.

Now, let's find Pike.

Macomb, how we gonna do that?

We'll scratch every part of Kansas, we gotta.

One, he's got the money.

Two, the law catches up with him, he can identify us.

Three, be a pleasure watching him bleed more than he is.

[music playing]

Well, I got all that lead out.

What's your name, boy?

Pike.

Cyrus Pike.

I suppose it ain't none of my business

how you got them bullets in you.

It was outlaws.

Well, they done a good job.

I'll say that for 'em.

Miss Kitty.

Uh, couple of you fellers get these horses on

down to the stable, will you?

Matthew get back, did he?

No, haven't heard a word.

Did you have any luck?

Aw, just like them [inaudible].

Got theirselves swallowed up.

We've been at it all day, night after night.

Like I told you in the first place,

I can't examine you unless you take off part of your clothes.

I knowed it.

You get me up on here, and then you want

to get my clothes off of me.

Well, I ain't gonna do it.

You'll just have to hide your disappointment.

Well, you come up here and you got a pain in your lower back.

Now, how you expect me to find it unless I can feel of you?

Nobody's gonna feel of me.

Sally, you haven't by any chance

seen four men riding out on the prairie the last couple days,

have you? -Want a sliver?

Uh, no thank you.

No, I seen a couple of buffalo hunters.

Why?

Well, we were robbed here Monday night.

I just thought you might have come across them out there.

Well, no.

Seen 'em buffalo grizzlies and some lizards and-- so.

Well, keep your eyes open for me if you're out there,

will you?

All right, Sally.

Oh.

I've gotta unhitch you later and give you something to eat,

but I've got a little errand of mercy.

Well, it wasn't easy, but we got it.

[music playing]

Where's the boy?

But where's the boy gone?

Oh.

Pike!

Pike!

[music playing]

Can you tell me why you tried to run off?

PIKE: I-- I didn't want to cause you no more trouble.

Didn't want to cause me no more trouble.

You did that already.

Oh, them's got to taste bad or else it don't do no good.

I seen the marshal today in Dodge.

He told me there'd been a robbery in town.

What'd you say?

I said I knew it!

Said I knew who the robber was, had him home in my bed,

that he was shot up something fearful.

Ah, he'd been here by now, you told him that.

Just wanted you to see that I can lie as good as you can.

[music playing]

I-- I guess, guess I gotta own up to it.

I was one of them that held up that freight office.

Stupid thing for me to do, me just green from Arkansas.

Fell into bad company.

You believe that, don't you?

You're telling it.

Them I fell in with just, they didn't want to share,

shot and left me to die.

Took all the money, they did.

Rest is like I told ya.

[music playing]

Well?

Well, what do you say to that?

I say to that that in a day or two,

you're gonna be able to hang onto that saddle horn as good

as you can lie, and I'll be glad rid of you.

[music playing]

Hicks, Macomb says you can eat now.

I can't wait.

All right, keep a sharp eye.

Over a week.

We coulda hit a stage and been in the nations by now.

We'll find him.

Cold beans.

Nobody'd see a fire out here.

Not if there ain't none.

You want to strike out on your own, go ahead.

No, that ain't it.

Might be laying dead out there in the prairie somewhere.

I hope he ain't.

Just laying dead in the prairie.

We'll find him covered with sand.

If he ain't dead yet, we'll cover him up personally.

[music playing]

Well, he was here.

Or somebody was, bleeding pretty bad, too.

I kinda figured he wouldn't ride too far with them

bullets in him.

Yeah, but he did ride out, else they buried him around here.

Let's keep looking.

[music playing]

Afternoon.

Where'd you get that shirt?

Well, I found it over in that trunk over there.

Arms kinda messed up, so I, uh, sort of washed

it out while you was gone.

Go through folks' stuff while they's away, do ya?

Raised like trash was you.

Well, I didn't figure you'd mind.

Do you?

I

Here, I fixed this up for ya.

I never asked you to.

Well, I know that.

I wanted to.

You have any paint?

Yes, I got paint.

Any particular color you like?

That's her.

You like rabbit stew, do you?

Too stringy.

You know, I thought we might eat out by the lake today.

Already fixed up a table.

That suit you, does it?

[music playing]

Well, here we are like a couple of savages,

out here with the bugs and the tree wrappings.

That sure ain't civilized.

Well, tell me, old lady, was it stringy?

Not as bad as most.

Oh, compliments just don't come natural to you, do they?

Folks that gush just want something.

[mule braying]

Look at my Worthless!

[music playing]

Well-- well, you got most all of it.

That's for certain.

I don't want nothing I ain't got,

and I don't need anything more.

What are you collecting all that junk at the house for?

That ain't junk.

That's just good things that need fixing.

Hmm.

Where do you get it all?

The prairie.

Folks moving west.

They start out with their wagons piled high.

But don't take long to find out the wagon bogs down.

Then they got to unload.

It's amazing what they find they can do without once the going

gets rocky.

I kind of think I can make up stories about them, what they

was like, what they was thinking when they were unsatisfied,

what made them want to go to the far west.

Well, I'll tell you something, old lady,

it don't take much making up.

Going out to get rich, dig for gold.

Gold ain't no good for nobody.

Oh, is that so?

Tell me, you plan on keeping all those good things at the house

for yourself do you?

I plan on fixing them up and selling them.

Oh.

Selling them? Selling them for what?

For money.

And it ain't the same as gold.

When let me tell you something, old lady-- you got money,

you got gold and everything changes.

I mean, you're somebody.

You can live in a big old house way up on a hill

and look down on everybody.

That's important to you, huh?

Looking down on somebody?

It is to me.

That's why when I'm fit, I'm riding out of here

and into the gold fields.

I don't ever want to see Arkansas or Kansas again.

Oh, being rich, it's the only way to be.

Your folks, I suppose they was dirt-poor farmers had

to scratch for everything they got?

Uh-huh.

Maybe.

Yeah.

Half of what they scratched for went to some gold hoarder

lived up on top of a hill in a fancy house.

Suppose that's about right, too, ain't it?

Well, it ain't that I don't think money's good.

I could spend my share if I had it, I'll tell you.

Hey, tell me something, old lady.

You had all the money in the world, what

would you buy first off, huh?

Choppers, crockery, store teeth.

Well, I-- well, I never figured that.

Yes, sir.

I'd buy me a set of them fancy white porcelain store teeth,

and then I'd get me a slab of steak,

and I'd chew right through her.

And then I'd go down into town, and I'd smile at everybody,

showing off.

You know something?

They wouldn't call me names no more.

You mean-- you mean they do that to you?

Oh, kids, mostly.

They're just teasing.

I don't care.

It gives them a chance to feel better than somebody else.

All of us have to do that once in a while.

Well, are you gonna clean up this mess or just sit there?

Yup.

Aw, never mind.

Sit there.

You're mending.

I'll do it.

Worthless?

Come on, boy.

[singing]

Oh, I wish I'd known you when.

[singing]

Need some help?

Oh, no, thanks.

I'm a stickler for keeping things clean.

What are all these for?

Why, I sell 'em.

A penny a pound.

They're just like money in the bank.

[music playing]

[horses galloping]

Hey, you get hid.

[music playing]

Hello, Sally.

Miss Sally.

Howdy, Marshal, Festus.

You're still looking for varmints?

That's right.

And that's a good name for 'em, too.

They killed a man over in Skellyville a couple days ago.

SALLY: Is that so?

You haven't seen anybody since we talked?

Uh, no.

No, I can't say I have.

MATT: Well, I guess we might as well head back to Dodge

and start looking again for 'em. Thanks, Sally.

Much obliged, Miss Sally.

Yeah, uh, so long.

Lies come from your mouth real natural-like, lady.

They said they killed 'un.

Don't know nothing about that.

Musta been after I lit out.

You sure?

Two days ago, he said.

I was right here.

I've been here for over a week.

You know that.

What are you gonna do?

Nothing.

Gonna stay for a while?

Stay here a while?

Well, I might as well.

I got me a real fine palace and some of the best

company for miles around.

No, you're mocking me.

Mocking?

I ain't mocking at all, old woman.

I'm just being grateful.

Fact is, I might just move in with you permanent.

Oh, never mind overdoing it.

You know, I think, uh-- think I'm gonna

do me a little bit of hunting.

Hunting?

Yeah, I'm a little-- little tired of that old rabbit stew

with black-eyed peas.

Say, you know, them gold fields is awful cold and wet.

Oregon, too.

And Colorado, they got ice and snow to boot.

Well, I ain't going to the gold fields.

I'm going hunting.

My horse still down the gully?

Kansas is the country.

Kansas got everything a fella could ask for.

I ain't going yet.

[music playing]

I think you're off your noodle!

You crazy old fool!

He don't give a spit in a holler about you.

In the first place, he ain't coming back.

And in the second place and the third and the fourth place,

if he did come back, you'd be better off to be rid of him.

Where's my towel?

Oh, there it is.

And in the fifth place-- oh, yeah there it

is-- if he did come back, he don't need a mother.

Most of all, he don't need an old hag like you.

[music playing]

That rust on them elbows has set in by a good ten years.

That ain't gonna come off with big bristles.

And my-- [grunts]

Maybe you're right, Worthless.

I never went through this for nobody,

not when I was 17 years young, let alone 67 years old.

But it just goes to show you what happens

when you go without your hat.

Too much sun scrambles your brains.

He ain't gonna stay on here anyway, no matter what.

[music playing]

[mule braying]

Don't you say one single, solitary thing.

It ain't worth the pain.

I'll tell you that.

[music playing]

PIKE: Hey, lady!

Lady!

You came back!

You came back!

Well, look at you, old woman.

Oh, don't look at me.

Look at that venison steak up there, all ready for the fire.

Do you think you can chew it?

Oh, I'm gonna chew it.

I'll gum it to death if I got to.

Hey, did you-- did you take a bath

and get all gussied up just for me?

Oh, no.

No!

No, I took a bath-- I got a-- I took a bath because it's

my-- my-- my birthday.

Your birthday?

Well-- well, what's the date?

I don't-- well, I don't know the date of my birth.

I just pick a day.

I just pick a day for myself.

But you didn't have nothing to do with it.

No.

I don't usually go to a place if I don't know where I'm going.

Oh, you'll see it soon enough, old woman.

I ain't sure Worthless and me wants

to go for a ride with you.

Oh, you're gonna like it when you get there.

How come you brought your horse?

Oh, might, uh, might find another deer that

needs killing, draggin' back.

Hey, you just full of talk, ain't you?

I am when somebody's got secrets.

Hyah!

Giddy-up, horsey!

Don't do that to her!

She don't like it.

What do you mean she don't like it?

How do you know what she likes, what she don't like?

She tell you, does she? -Yes.

She talk to me, and I talk to her.

Come on, Worthless, honey.

And if you want to call me loony,

you go ahead if you want to.

No, I had, uh-- I had me a loony grandma once

on my pa's side.

You remind me of her some.

Ahoy, old wind bag!

Yep, old Grandma Tinsley was her name.

Grey hair all kind of poking out from a little bun-like thing

in the back, and her little eyes just as sharp as daggers.

And her mouth, whoo!

Old mouth would never stop talking

from sun-up to sun-down.

Oh.

Uh, I loved that old woman, I did.

She sure was good to me.

I remind you of her?

Your mouth is always going on like hers.

Yeah, you know, she used to-- she used

to pick me up and put me up on her lap,

tell me all kinds of stories.

She even used to give me a little dip out of her snuff can

when she thought nobody was watching.

I could give you a chew.

Oh, no.

No, thanks.

You do enough for the both of us.

Yeah, you know, everybody thought she was crazy.

But me, I always wanted to do something for her,

give her a little something better than she had.

I never got the chance.

By the time I had anything, she died.

She ain't buried out here, is she?

Hyah!

Giddy-up, horsey!

Let's put a little muscle into it, girl!

We're going to a party.

Come on!

Whoa, whoa.

This is where I found you.

Well, are we just gonna sit here till snow flies?

Tell me something, old woman.

Have you ever in your whole life ever

had a real birthday present?

Well, you mean something I didn't get for myself?

Talk from somebody give me?

Yup.

That's-- that's what I mean.

No.

I can't say that I have.

Why would somebody want to give me something?

Well, maybe 'cause they liked you.

Maybe 'cause you done some nice for them, huh?

I never did nothing nice for nobody and nobody

never did nothing nice for me, and that's the way I want it.

Is it?

Why don't you just say what you want to say?

Blurt it out straight!

All right.

Come on.

Come on.

I'm going to give you the best birthday present

that you ever seen, old woman.

[music playing]

You been lying all the time, ain't you?

I tried to pick the truths out of what you said.

But I did.

$1,200, Sally Fergus.

Saving my life.

It's stoled, ain't it?

What's that got to do with it?

It's money.

Ain't nobody asking where it come from.

I'm offering you a present-- half of everything I got.

That's more money than you seen in your whole life.

Well, say something!

It's stole.

It ain't yours to give.

Now you take this money, and I ain't fooling!

Buy you some teeth, maybe.

Maybe a dress or two.

Anything you want, you can have.

Who wants it!

Not-- I don't want it!

What do you mean you don't want it?

You're a stupid old woman, you know that?

Stupid and crazy!

I may be crazy, but I ain't crazy enough to get mixed

up with robbers and people that'd shoot you

just as soon as look at you.

You better take that money to Matt Dillon.

Oh, sure.

Yeah, yeah, and go to jail.

Oh, you really are out of your head.

You know that?

You brung your horse.

Now go away.

You was gonna give me the money and then make a getaway.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, and by damn, that's what I'm gonna do.

And leave you here!

Leave you here to pick up junk till your old shack looks

like a graveyard, for all I care!

My shack may look like a graveyard,

but when I walk down the street, I don't have to hang my head!

Do you hear that?

I hear you.

It's the last I'm gonna have to listen to from you, old woman!

[music playing]

Pike!

I've been raspy to you.

But I wish you'd stay a while!

Come back!

Come back, please.

[music playing]

Go on, honey.

Get something to eat.

Just you and me again.

Find something to eat.

Afternoon, ma'am.

[music playing]

What are you doing in my place?

Oh, just sampling some of your whiskey here.

Well, you got the whiskey.

Now get out!

Ain't very neighborly of you, turning

strangers away from your door.

We're looking for a friend of ours.

Maybe you've seen him?

Name of Pike.

Well, I ain't seen nobody.

But you better get out of here or I'll take my musket

and I'll blast you!

Now, ma'am.

You've seen him all right.

Look at that.

And, uh, you're gonna tell us where he's at now, ain't you?

Huh?

That old woman's really crazy.

Crazier than a bed bug that old woman

is and twice as worrisome.

Stole money.

Like anybody cared!

Well, she can just stay back there

and get us falling down to that old shack

of hers for all I care!

I'm gonna-- I'm gonna go to the gold fields, get rich

like nobody ever dreamed of! I don't need her!

I don't think that old woman!

I don't need nobody!

I told you, I found that shirt out on the prairie.

If it's yours, take it!

I just kept it cause I was gonna wash it up and try to sell

it and make a few pennies.

You know, pretty thing, uh, three of us,

we got a mean streak that runs all the way down to the quick.

And, uh, it's just aching to come out.

Now you'd be better off telling us where he is.

I don't know who you're talking about.

Well, it don't seem that way to me, now.

Nursed him, didn't you?

Old hag, we'd like to do things the easy way.

Now before I kick in the rest of your teeth,

suppose you tell us where Pike's at.

Hey, there's lots of pretty bottles over here.

What do you do with 'em?

Do you sell 'em?

How much is, uh, that one worth, pretty thing?

She probably shot herself when she realized

how much money she turned down.

You figure that?

[gunshot]

And just like her to miss on the first try.

[gunshot]

Ah!

Come on!

[gunshots]

Well, looks like you ain't got much left to sell.

That don't mean nothing.

Them's just bottles.

You don't tell us, hag, we'll burn your shack down.

Then we'll kill you.

Go ahead.

Me and that old shack have seen our best days, anyway.

Start with that mule.

Kind of like that old mule, do you?

No!

Don't you hurt my mule!

I'll-- I'll tell you!

He went to Dodge.

What for?

I don't know.

He didn't tell me nothing.

Well, what about the law there?

It's Matt Dillon, ain't it?

Yeah, but he ain't there.

He come by here today on his way to Hays City.

What for?

He said he was tracking some scum who robbed

the freight office in Dodge.

Pike's in Dodge.

The law's in Hays.

That makes it kind of nice, don't it?

Let's get to riding.

Don't!

Mister, don't!

Don't hurt Worthless!

She's all I got!

That's her name, is it?

No! [gunshot]

[music playing]

What happened?

Oh, it's all right.

It's all right.

What happened?

They shot her.

My poor Worthless.

She never done nobody no harm.

They shot her 'cause of meanness.

She ain't dead yet.

Who was it?

Three men?

It's all right, honey.

What'd you tell 'em?

Say, you got to get out of here.

They're after you.

I'll take care of my mule.

What'd you tell 'em?

I told 'em that you was in Dodge.

They believe you?

SALLY: Oh, poor honey.

Oh, my little honey.

I'll-- I'll put her out of her pain if you want me to.

Put her out of her pain?

Oh!

She's just an old mule!

Listen, you leave her be.

She's the only thing that-- that ever

loved me just because I was me.

[music playing]

I hope you find your gold Pike and your house on the hill.

I'm out of my crazy head.

There's some laudanum in the shack.

Get it and try and pour it down her, get her onto her feet

and onto the wagon.

We'll use my horse to get her into Dodge.

You mean, we're gonna take her to Doc?

Yeah, she might make it if we can tie her down good and snug.

Oh, but we can't use your horse.

You got to get away.

Go on before I change my mind and do what's logical!

[music playing]

I know that'll do the work.

I made that myself.

It probably takes-- now, the main thing is just

don't let him take any more than it

says there 'cause it's pretty-- -Evening, Miss Kitty.

Hi, Festus. How are you?

Doc.

Good evening, Festus.

Well, looks like you got yourself a new label in there.

She does have a lot of ingredients.

Yes.

Oh, yes.

New, is it?

[coughing]

There I go again. -Good heavens.

That's that same cough.

Yeah, it's the same cough.

Well, I was just gonna have me a beer.

But now I reckon I better have something a little stouter.

[coughing]

You sound terrible!

Oh, Miss Kitty, it's that blamed hackety cough.

I just can't get rid of it.

Reckon it's all that prairie dust, you know.

[coughing]

Uh, well, um, say, would you-- would

you like to try some of the this?

I can't guarantee how it's going to taste--

Oh, foot, Miss Kitty.

When a feller's in need, he don't

give a hoot about the taste.

Yes'm, I'll try some.

Must be something that's going around.

Sure hope it helps.

It probably will, Miss Kitty.

Well, I thought you'd, well, just like to taste it.

You know, you might not like it.

Oh, Miss Kitty, if you want me to give her a good sampling,

you might as well just go ahead on and fill her on up.

Oh, castor oil!

Well, what's the matter, Festus.

Don't you like that?

You ornery old scudder, you.

That's the very same stuff you tried to palm off on me.

I never tried to pawn anything off on you!

This ought to cure you from mooching drinks!

I want to-- I'm just gonna tell you--

Doc?

Yeah?

Sally Fergus is down at the livery,

wants to see you right away. DOC: What about?

Well, her mule's in a bad way.

Good heaven, I got more to do than take care of sick mules!

If it wasn't for doctoring mules,

you wouldn't have no business at all!

Shut up.

Blamed old sneaky scamp.

Now, we'd better get on out of here.

That old woman's gonna have us in jail.

Settle down a minute.

Festus, I-- I'm partially to blame for this.

I'm sorry.

Here, chase it down with some of this.

It's on the house.

Much obliged, Miss Kitty.

Oh!

Yeah, that there's more like it.

That there's more like it.

Now, move out real casual.

[music playing]

The wagon.

The saddlebags.

PIKE: How is she, Doc?

Well, she's not feeling any pain.

How much laudanum did you give her, Sally?

More than half a bottle.

I didn't know but if it was the same for a mule as a human.

Well, just might have saved her life.

Kept her from shock.

I'll take the bullet out, and she'll be all right.

Get my horse unhitched.

[mule braying]

She's better!

[music playing]

Pike!

Marshal, stop 'em!

They're the men you've been looking for!

[music playing]

Drop it or I'll part your hair.

[music playing]

Step back.

All right.

Turn around.

[music playing]

Well, never figured I'd get to spend it anyway.

[music playing]

Mornin', Festus.

Mornin', Miss Sally.

Morning, Marshal.

I'd like to see Pike.

Well, go right in, Miss Fergus.

Matt, did you see that?

Let's go and take a breather outside.

Well, did you bring me a file, old lady?

Nope.

But if you want to gnaw your way out of here, I can help you.

[music playing]

Doc says you paid for 'em.

Sure hope the money wasn't stole.

No.

I had me some money I worked for.

Like 'em?

I think you look fine, Sally Fergus.

Just fine.

Doc says that I'll get used to 'em.

But I still feel like I got a mouthful of marbles.

I whistle and clack a lot.

But it's sure worth it.

Say, uh, got a little business I want to talk over with you.

When you get out of prison, do you still figure

on going to them gold fields?

Figured I might.

Well, my place ain't much, but it's mine.

It's all mine.

And I ain't got no family.

And you ain't got no family.

So--

So?

Well, when you get out of jail, if you want to come there

and stay a while, you can.

What makes you think I need mothering?

Mothering don't get it.

You just need somebody smarter than you

to keep you out of trouble.

Smarter than me?

You?

Well, I'm on the other side of these bars, ain't I?

Well-- I'll think it over.

Well, don't take too long.

And remember this-- there's a lot of other young bucks

in the woods.

Well, now, is that so?

SALLY: Yeah, that's so.

So while you're making up your mind,

I'll be over at Delmonico's saying howdy to a few of them

and chewing myself a nice, juicy steak.

[music playing]

PIKE: Hey, old woman!

Expect me about September.

[music playing]

September?

What was that there all about?

That there's about old Sally Fergus just got herself a date!

Good day, gents.

[music playing]

Mister, I want me a steak!

[music playing]

NARRATOR: Stay tuned for exciting scenes

from our next "Gunsmoke."

[theme music]