Original subtitles

-Who is it? -The guest.

-Can I know who that is? -Check out who's here!

Yes!

Great!

-Hello. -I can't believe this.

-The mysterious guest. -Corrado Guzzanti.

-Corrado at Dinner Club. -You've brought some cabaret pastries!

Some cabernet pastries, as they say.

-Falanghina. -Finally, so we'll try a different wine.

-Make yourself at home. -Next to your friend.

Let me set it up for you.

-How nice, thank you. -What a great surprise.

Hello, Corrado.

I'll taste straight away...

How much did this wine cost?

I'm telling you, around 30 euros.

-Wow! -But I'm like that.

You're crazy, you know that?

Corrado is here

because he would like to take part in a sort of an open day.

He would like to know...

How it works.

I believe outpatient surgery would be better, right?

That's afterwards.

How come you came a bit late?

I had a judo class.

-They knew. -Judo?

Yes.

So, since you've been working out, you must be starving, right?

Yes, I'm quite hungry. I've been fighting some big guys.

Judo is a sport for porters, not for...

At the wholesale markets, you walk carrying...

-Have you done some judo? -Judo.

Talking about cooking, how...

A disaster-- I'm a...

-How good are you? -I'm useless.

Like a retired guy hanging around constructions sites.

I can't do anything, but I stand there and say,

"I would add some oil."

"I would add some spice. You put too much of that."

We can make a toast, right?

We can do that.

Hooray!

-Welcome! -Hooray!

-Go, Corrado! -Thank you!

-Yes. -Go, Corrado! Go, Carlo!

Corrado, you don't know this,

but we've just had bull's testicles.

-Shame I missed that. -It's a shame indeed.

-Great experience. -You shouldn't brag. He'll feel sorry.

But you're here just on time

to taste Rocco's ramiccia. With conger eel's sauce.

Damn!

How did you fish conger eels?

I can't see it anymore!

Where is it?

Here it is!

Carlo!

I've found it!

She got it!

-No! -She found the conger eel!

I've found it!

She beat you at conger eel fishing.

I felt like a master doing it.

Very good.

Damn, Fanelli doesn't have two hands. She has two pincers.

-Carlo. -Number one.

Are you starting to think you bet on the wrong horse?

Just telling you.

Very good!

Heroes, hunters!

-You were really good. -I was really good.

-With your hands? -At what... At what depth?

-With your foot. -Look,

it was something... I can't explain that.

Rocco, let's go cook.

-I caught it by instinct. -Great!

-With my bare hands. -Her hands.

-With my hands, you know... -Wow!

Gentlemen.

-The conger eel! -The conger eel!

-Did you fish that? -I did.

You've all my respect.

It's between an eel and a fish.

-It's indecisive. -Yes, between an eel...

Its DNA doesn't know what it belongs to.

How did you do it with your hands?

-Was it stuck there? -I have to say,

that I followed Ciro.

Ciro, the fisherman.

-He got it. -He did.

I asked him to "make me look good."

"Let me hold it for five minutes."

-"Let me hold it a sec." Because... -"Hand it over."

We applaud your honesty.

-You're being very honest. -Bravo!

-Emanuelina! -Drink something, Emanuela.

You're a legend!

How are you doing?

We're making conger's sauce.

Rocco learned how to make this sauce in Formia,

along the Appian Way.

There was an ancient Roman theatre,

which has now become an apartment building.

An apartment building?

OLD THEATER IN FORMIA THE APPIAN WAY, KM. 147

Do you remember who took us there?

Andrea, the fruit seller.

Very good!

How good, one more toast!

-You have a great memory. -Bravo, bravo!

You know my father filmed Two Women here?

-In Formia, with Sophia Loren. -Yes.

I hadn't been born yet.

That's beautiful.

-Good morning. -How are you? Are you okay?

I'm taking you to the "Gate."

-We call it, "Gliù Cancieglie." -"Gliù Cancieglie."

To Anna and Pompea.

Anna, they say they're taking conger eel. Where from?

-There are the small ones... -And the big ones.

There are some as big, and some as small.

-Why do you call it "Gliù Cancieglie"? -There's a gate. "Cancieglie" means gate.

-Really? -It's that simple.

-What do you know? -It's that simple.

OLD ROMAN THEATER

Look at this. "Gliù Cancieglie."

-Non è "Lu Cancello"? -No, è "Gliù Cancieglie."

-Andiamo a "Gliù Cancieglie." -Yes.

-I love these kind of entrances... -Let's go.

Anna! Pompea!

-Look who's here with me! -Welcome, welcome!

Oh, my!

-How are you? -Well, well.

-What an honor! -Nice to meet you.

-Even Papaleo. -Papaleo, yes.

-What an honor! -You know why I'm called Papaleo?

-I don't know. -Me neither.

It's beautiful here.

Pompea, Rocco and I are going to cook with you.

-It's ready. -Here's some conger eel.

-Let's get the tables. -Let's go.

-Go. -Let's go.

-So, we have to make... -The conger eel soup.

So, put the sauce.

So, how is the recipe?

Garlic, oil, and chili pepper. That's it.

-Wait a second... -Hey!

What are you doing?

Let's go...

-I've heard some noise. -Oh my...

Pompea, what about the zucchini?

I want to make a side dish for the fish.

What do you do?

I've been working with priests for 42 years.

I'm a priest's housekeeper.

You have to tell me about your sins.

-Don't you have any? -We need some time for that.

-For your sins? You have a lot, then. -Unfortunately, I do.

-So, you have to clear your conscience. -My conscience.

-Where is Pompea? -She's cooking.

Where shall I put this taralli?

I'll take this off.

Yes, the fin.

No, you don't need that. It's full of bones.

-Can I cut, Pompea? -Yes.

-Go on. -So, Rocco,

just know that at Dinner Club, if you mix conger eel and ramiccia,

you'll make a splash.

Okay, thanks for trusting me.

-What's there to eat? -The ramiccia.

With conger eel sauce.

-You are so slow... -Well...

Rocco Papaleo's ramiccia

Rocco Papaleo's ramiccia

We love it

Our ramiccia

We'll eat it

Not on a train

We'll eat it

We don't know when, but...

We'll see

We'll see, we'll see

Go, Christian!

And Papaelo's

Ramiccia

I eat it every day when I'm here

Because the ramiccia

My guy from Potenza

It's something unique

Yes, it is unique

Basilicata

Rocco you're great,

You're like a gang bang

-Yes! -So nice!

Things are taking a wrong turn.

Things are taking a wrong turn.

Let's stop here.

-Bravo! -Yes!

Keep your hands like this when you cut an onion.

The blade must rest on the nail, okay?

Look at me. Look at me.

No, look at me.

So, you won't make a mistake.

Why shall I look at you? I must look there.

No, then obviously, you need some patience.

It's not something you get right straight away.

So, if...

A bit more...

Okay, look at Pompea.

Slowly, slowly, slowly, slowly.

It's coming, it's coming, it's coming.

Very good.

-What if I cut myself? -I don't know.

-Do you have a band-aid? -Yes.

-Andrea is cutting bread for you. -Yes.

-I'm not going to eat all this bread. -How are we doing?

-Well. Very well. -Well.

-All good. -I've already eaten the beans.

-When are they coming? -It's coming. It is.

People have to eat.

-Clean it like this. -Yes.

-Take it off, and rinse it. -Okay.

-How long have you known Anna? -I have known Anna

for more than 60 years.

When she got married, she came to live here.

Where did you meet your husband? If I may ask.

Huh, well... I don't know.

-Don't you remember? -But how?

It's the wheel of fortune. How do I know?

Nice!

-Love at first sight! -Stroke of luck!

Did he pursue you?

No, because there was a Carabiniere, and I'm afraid of them.

Did you like your husband, or the Carabiniere?

Then, I met him.

I liked him, but I was still afraid of Carabinieri.

She liked him, but she was afraid of him.

-She was scared. -But her husband was not a Carabiniere.

No, no, no, no.

No, no, he was...

She married her husband, but she liked the Carabiniere.

-No. -No.

-No. -Things are different.

No, things are different.

Basically, she liked her husband,

but she was afraid of the Carabiniere.

She didn't want to get involved with him,

because she was afraid the Carabiniere would hurt him.

-Is that it? -No.

-You didn't get shit! -I didn't.

Talking about love,

since you are good actors,

how do you make a declaration of love?

It's very hard.

I'd like to see Sabrina.

Doing what?

Making a declaration of love to one of them.

-Go on. -To Corrado.

No, but if you don't feel it...

You can't know that.

Corrado...

Yes?

We've never said that before, but I really like you.

And then he goes,

I know, but look...

-I didn't do anything. -Well... And...

-I didn't do anything. -Anything at all.

He's like that.

-You can see, though. -Yes.

I'd like to see my colleague making a declaration of love.

-But why? I... No, no, no. -Yes.

-Emanuela! -Go, Emanuela.

-To Christian? Okay. -To Christian? Come on.

Come on, yes.

Look the other way, then I'll call you.

Christian.

Sorry, you turned your head twice, as Nino Manfredi used to do.

-You did... -Look, start over.

-Second take. -Shut up.

Christian...

-No, well... -Stop!

-You went overboard! -I lost interest.

-Well, you turned the other way. Come on. -I did.

-I'm a bit embarrassed. -Tell me.

Because, in this trip,

I have had...

feelings for you.

Something strong.

-A spark? -I felt a spark...

Why are you laughing?

No, it's something about... I'm not laughing at you.

No, but the spark...

-It's not like... -No, I like it.

-A spark? -Yes.

I felt an ardor, and feelings which have surprised me.

I know you are committed to someone else,

-but-- -For 50 years.

If there is a chance,

-I'll be there. -How nice!

A toast for my friend, the best actress in Italy.

-Of course. -A toast!

How about spin the bottle afterwards?

Ladies and gentlemen.

Here it is.

Ladies and gentlemen.

The conger of the year!

-Bravo! -Excellent!

For the little heroine of the Seven Seas.

Thank you, you really appreciate me, thank you.

People, enjoy my talent,

so at to speak.

-Thank you, Rocco. Thank you, Pompea. -Thank you.

Hooray!

How wonderful!

-Shall we make room? -Oh my!

Look at this.

-Are we gonna eat it on the wooden board? -Yes.

-Same as polenta? -How wonderful!

-How wonderful! -This pasta is nice, bravo!

-Lovely, Rocco! -Bravo, Rocco!

Rocco.

What's the name of this dish?

The Gronghiccia.

THE GRONGHICCIA

-The union between conger and ramiccia. -Nice... And ramiccia.

Nice.

Wow, how beautiful. It's really spectacular.

Help yourself.

-Chri-Chri! -Not much, with fish I'm a bit...

-It's very good! -Very good.

-It's very good! -Very good.

Watch out, I've found a sword.

-A sword? -There are some fish bones.

Too late!

Call someone!

It was very good... Very good.

Christian, have a taste.

To be honest, I don't really like fish...

-I liked it. -See?

You know Christian can't stand fish.

How come? Did you have some trauma as a child?

My grandmother, for a whole year,

made me eat sole every day

with vegetable soup when polio spread in Rome.

I ate that for a year, at lunch and at dinner.

Sole and vegetable soup.

That's why I don't eat either fish, or vegetable soup.

Vegetable soup is coming next.

Shall we ask for the bill?

Anyway, Rocco, my biggest compliments.

-Thank you, Antonio. -Bravo.

I have to say Rocco was... He passed the exam.

Sorry, sorry.

What is it?

Can I say something to Rocco?

Go on.

Rocco...

is many things.

He's a songwriter, an actor,

simple and complex.

Maybe, though,

the best word... he taught me a word

to describe him...

"Sponzare."

What does it mean?

Something to do with "married"?

-As to say "united"? -No.

It means "soaked."

Shuffled, soaked.

And Rocco and the Dinner Club

are so "sponzati"

to turn this trip into something unique.

-See? A toast? -Well.

To "sponzatura"!

-Bravo, Rocco! -See how people grow at Dinner Club?

But it's a bit unfair.

-No. -I mean here there were...

-three people who travelled. -Exactly.

-It's all Rocco. -Isn't that true?

No, he was the first.

Emanuela did much more.

But it's not a competition, it's not.

-Exactly. -It's also a competition.

There's a competition, love.

-Sabrina, she said it's not a competition. -There's a competition.

I made one of the most difficult dishes in the world!

We haven't eaten that yet.

So, Christian?

-Shall we go? -Big surprise.

-Come on! -Great! Hooray!

We'll try a dish with French origins.

-Oh là là! -Oh là là!

Today and forever.

-See you. -See you.

See you later.

SAN LEUCIO THE APPIAN WAY, KM. 148

-Look at this place! -So nice!

Oh, my!

This is the first example of a municipality with subsistence

which King Ferdinand wanted to build

and where everybody was equal,

everybody had food, and a house.

-Nice. -Democratic.

Yes.

We're here.

-Shall we get off here? -Yes, let's get off here.

Go on.

Thank you.

Wonderful.

Is this San Leucio?

-Yes. -How nice!

Follow me.

What was this thing here?

-A factory? -This was the factory

for the production of silk.

Of course, they made all the velvet for the palace, as well.

-Not bad, huh? -Very nice.

-Nice! -These Bourbons knew how to live.

Dang!

Ferdinand IV and Maria Carolina of Austria

lived here for years.

-A very sophisticated aristocrat, right? -Exactly.

-They know many things. -Yes.

Let's listen.

Yes, she was very sophisticated.

While he was a bit more...

-Rough? -Rough... A ragamuffin.

He says "rough," and he looks at us.

When he says "aristocrat," he looks at Christian.

-He looks at us, when saying "rough." -No.

Anyway,

we owe to Carolina of Austria

the arrival, in the Bourbon kingdom, of the "monsù."

Do you know what monsù are?

It's a mispronounced mounsier.

Exactly.

-"Monsieur," "monsù..." -He can't know that.

-He even knows monsù. -He knows monsù.

The monsù was a court chef

who used to live with the noble families.

We are going to find here

the last of the monsù,

and we're going to cook a royal timbale with him.

Actually, Christian, you're going to make it.

You'll go on a guided tour,

and you'll learn about etiquette, good manners.

I mean, it's useless, 'cause you and me...

-You need it. -Etiquette...

Where are you from?

-The place where you were born and raised. -Versailles.

-See you later. -Bye. Good luck.

-Bye. -Bye.

Christian, the last of the monsù.

Gerardo.

-How are you? -Hello.

Nice to meet you, what an honor!

-Yes. -It's an honor for me.

I have never cooked,

and you have to teach me how to make something really complicated.

Exactly. Christian has to reproduce

this timballo Flammand

stuffed with meat, vegetables and béchamel,

-covered with bucatini. -Yes.

Exactly like you make it.

You'll help me.

-I'll give you an apron, first. -Yes.

-What's the name of this lady? -I don't know.

Anyway, Emanuela...

Shubha.

Rocco, nice to meet you.

"Nice to meet you"?

-Well... Yes. -You can't say "nice to meet you."

We're off to a bad start.

-I mean, I don't... -No, because...

Galateo: The Rules of Polite Behavior suggests to say it

at the end, when we know it has actually been a pleasure.

-So, I should have said... -So...

-..."Rocco." -Shubha.

-"I hope it will be a pleasure." -No, it's the same.

Hide your hands, I'm not sure.

-No? -I think not.

-Where shall I put them? -I'll keep them here.

On my thighs.

What is the right posture at the table?

In a religious situation, I could be like that.

Don't take roads outside our areas of expertise.

I think it's like that.

Like that?

-That's right. -Is it?

-It's right. -With your wrists on the...

With your wrists on the edge of the table.

So, to keep this position, what shall we use?

-To help us? -Books?

Very good.

So, take two books each.

Thank you.

Thanks for giving me the light ones.

-I'm always a gentleman. -You are.

No, not on your head.

-Where, then? -Where did they put books?

Under your armpits!

Otherwise, you'll eat like that.

I found Cracco's books.

So, I must eat like this, right?

-You eat like this, right? -Yes.

It's comfy, because...

-I mean, as in... -You feel relaxed.

It's not that complicated.

No, it's not that complicated.

-You are as sexy as a... -Only move your forearms.

Only your forearms, right.

You see, these will make you laugh.

Yes, Cracco's books.

I want to read you the titles.

The first one is "Some like it Cracco."

You laughed.

-Did you just laugh, Corrado? -Yes, but respectfully.

We are commenting some titles.

You need some friends, some help.

The great books of Carlo Cracco.

-"Some like it Cracco." -Thanks, honey.

"Some like it Cracco."

"Some like it Cracco."

Who likes what?

-Few, many? -Cracco.

-Cracco. -"Which came first, the flour or the egg?"

"The flour or the egg?"

He doesn't write books anymore,

because after two of them, they started going after him.

But he came up with a third: "Say, make, braise, Maestro!"

"Say, make, braise," is his culinary will,

but it is still great literature.

I would buy them all.

It will add up to €450,

which makes it...

-Thirty-two for all the five books. -Thirty-two for all the five books.

"TV Proboscide"!

Truth is that one book is nice,

then two, up to seven, but then it's a pain in the ass.

The first one is the most annoying one.

-Is it? -It's because you must...

-Shall I twist it like that? -It's like a wheel.

A spiral.

You know those licorice wheels?

And when it's done, what shall I do?

You put it here in the center and go on.

So, I'll put this.

Gerardo, shall I go on like that?

Well, wait.

To do this job,

you must be passionate, right?

-And patient. -Patience comes always first.

-It must go around it. -Like a wheel, a spiral.

It's terrible, terrible, terrible.

It's the most difficult thing.

It must get up to here, then.

It's the most difficult dish in the world. And everything must be perfect.

-How marvelous, what an effort! -See, Gerardo?

-A meticulous job. -See that?

When Christian commits to something, he's very good.

-If he wants... -We'll hire him as an assistant.

Look, look, look.

It's also beautiful.

-Now we start to cement it. -Yes.

I see. Let me do it.

Béchamel,

blended chicken breast,

and nut meg, plus a pinch of salt.

When it has cooled down,

you spread it out and it cements.

In this milieu, they followed a lot of posture lessons.

-Well... -How funny.

-Are you ready? -Go on.

Stand straight.

Well done!

-Dang. -Very good.

Wow!

-Dang. -Considering the wine as well.

And he didn't attend...

-the Academy of good manners. -I'm also winking a bit.

-Is that the winking? -It's Maradona-style balancing.

Let me see Sabrina with a book on her head.

Look... How nonchalant,

how elegant, how classy...

Look at that, I'm turning.

My head is not fit for this, I have a bump on it.

Look, I'm also dancing.

-Looks a bit like sirtaki, too. -Not bad, huh?

Very good.

-This is another exercise. -Look at this one.

You are working on your obedience.

-What a performance. -This is nice.

Let's give it up for Corrado.

-He's very good. -Here you go.

Really extraordinary!

Mushrooms,

peas,

cooked ham.

-And now, like this. -The bottom is dark.

And you mix it properly, okay?

Elbow grease, and start mixing it well.

Gerardo, shall we put it in here?

-Like this, with our hand? -Yes, go for it.

Go.

Nice!

This dish is nutritious, isn't it?

You know it!

Just remember, if you want you can change the stuffing.

Of course, put other things.

How long does it take to make this delicacy?

Oh, my!

Look at that!

My dear friends...

Peas.

-Instead of meat... -Livers.

...we'll put shrimps.

Exactly.

Shrimps, artichokes, basil, tomatoes.

Right?

A masterpiece, thank you...

-To monsù Gerardo. -...to monsù Gerardo.

-Now we'll put it in the oven. -I'll go on, then.

Perfect.

It's a long process, there are many steps to follow.

A whole fish

with béchamel,

with peas, and tomatoes

and then you put it in and cook it.

I think it's a bomb.

We are not eating, though.

Go on.

Perfect.

Careful on how you put it.

You know that... I was talking to them,

and I'm the only one from the North, except Cracco. The only Lombard.

You are all from... Rome, Basilicata...

But I know, Sabrina,

that you've tried to speak Lombard a while ago

for one of your roles.

Just pronounce more open vowels.

-That's not enough. -"The room."

-It sounds like Lombardy. -This is a stereotype.

"The kiddo."

"Let's go to the doctor."

-Well... -That's Italian.

No, the word "doctor" is pronounced differently.

So, spark, spark!

Okay, codfish-head!

Dialects are so nice, like the Roman one,

or the one from Veneto.

In Veneto you meet people, you do things, you are loud...

-That's the accent. -That's the accent.

A lot of people from Veneto have been very generous with me,

by saying, "You sound like..."

-They didn't beat you up. -Bravo, but...

Carlo, in Veneto, you say, "Take a bite out of that, dude!"

-"Take a bite out of that, dude"? -Yes.

"Your sista!"

We'll put it in the oven.

We have to say something to Corrado.

Carlo brought a suitcase during the trip.

He said, "In this suitcase, there's presents for you guys."

Come, I'd like you to try...

-To lift it. -Yes.

You thought you had to pretend, but it's actually very heavy.

It's about 40 pounds of a present.

Concrete?

Treasury bonds?

The timballo Flammand.

Good. It is very good.

It will be a great success.

What are you two doing?

-Nothing. -I see that...

What are you doing? You can't open the suitcase.

-I can't wait! -No, you can't open it!

What's inside is also mine.

-Zero, zero... -Rocco, I see you!

Are we going to the savannah?

All these narrow roads to go to...

Sant'Agata de' Goti.

-Do you know it? -No.

It's a perched village.

-How about that! -Very nice.

Nice.

-This road is smooth. -Very smooth.

SANT'AGATA DE' GOTI THE APPIAN WAY, KM. 240

THE SUSPENDED VILLAGE

So, are you happy?

Look where you brought us.

-It's like a Nativity scene. -It actually is.

Very nice.

Listen, what's inside that thing?

Shall we have a herbal tea?

-A herbal tea? -Yes.

This is herbal tea, the street one.

Is it octopus broth?

Exactly, octopus broth.

Once this was the only street food.

-Really? -They made this big broth,

a bit of tomatoes, someone added onions...

Sorry, but do you add lemon?

Yes, if you like it, a drop of lemon.

-I had a mental picture. -Ouch.

Carlo Cracco with a ladle

is like a music director with their batons.

Very nice. I'm going to publish this quote.

-Rocco, you must go to sleep. -I will publish it.

You're a bit tired, can I tell you that? You're tired. Thank you.

-You're tired, right? -A bit.

You're very tired. Put him into bed, please.

No...

-Rocco, how is it? -Very good.

-The broth is healthy, right? -It is, yes.

It's very good.

I like octopus. I don't like the fish with fish bones.

-It's starting to get chilly. -It is.

I think it's time to go to bed.

Let's go, come on.

Can I wish you goodnight my own way?

Yes.

"How do you make an octopus laugh?"

No, please, I'm knackered.

-I went fishing. -Come on, it's easy.

-It's easy. -I just asked one thing.

"How do you make an octopus laugh?"

-With "ink," or "tentacles"? -No, no.

"With ten-tickles!" Right?

-Wow, this calls for a scream. -Good night.

-This calls for a scream! -Turn off the light.

Oh, my God!

Be merciful.

"Fish like sharks."

-Dolphins? -No.

-"Fish like sharks"? -The kind.

It starts with an "S."

It starts with an "S."

An "F"?

-An "S"? -An "S."

"S" like "Sandra"?

Across or down?

What do you care? It's a word. Who cares?

Sorry, but this question was useless.

Well, let's try this other one.

"Decorate with frills."

Who knows? A "boorishade"?

No, decorate...

It's not a judgment on the action. What sort of crosswords is that?

I'll tell you one.

Yes.

Down.

"Why did the dog go to the bank?"

Don't say "To make a de-paws-it," or I'll jump out of here.

-I'll throw myself out. -I want to get off.

Enough with the puns! It sounds like first grade.

-I'm feeling melancholic. -Right?

So, let's make a toast to this wonderful club.

Well, in this wonderful club

I've also fulfilled a great dream.

Driving a rally car.

Really?

But I wasn't the only one to do it, huh?

Three...

two...

one...

Go!

Go, go, go, go!

-Watch out, watch out. -I would be dumb

to have an accident with you,

I mean your crocodile would shade mine.

Get lost!

-What is it? -Is it an esoteric moment?

-Toast! -Toast!

Here there used to be the Appian Way.

Never ask him for a joke.

Too late.

One of your quotes.

"Do it yourself, it's way better."

-I know that one. -I know that one.

That's the last one, in the meantime...

How nice!

-A small lash! -Huh.

-A small lash! -A small lash!