Original subtitles

This is for my da. My poor da.

Who are you? I'm Lieutenant Colonel Bill Stirling.

My brother was the midwife of this regiment.

I refuse to be its coroner.

He's changed the name of the regiment.

Giving them a new and even more effective way

of committing suicide.

Men of the newly-formed Special Raiding Squadron...

ALL: SAS, now and always!

Tomorrow, you deploy here.

The southeastern tip of Sicily.

MEN SHOUT

I've a baby I've never seen!

Stop! Stop the boat!

No!

Buddy, we've got room.

Cut him loose or I shoot him! Don't!

I'm sorry. Don't do that! I'm sorry. No!

My suspicion was that on July 9th, something was planned

which you were not sharing with your French allies.

It is the SRS who are spearheading the operation.

We left those men to drown!

This is just the snout.

It is our job to take the whole hog, right the way up to the tail.

Paddy, we have less than

three minutes to clear these

positions before the rest of

the boys land. Reggie...

..are you familiar with the Irish folk tale

about the Salmon of Knowledge?

No, Paddy, I don't know the Irish folk tale...

Basically, a wee tale that explains why

the common man, like you and I,

are smarter than those high-born

sons of bitches who try to rule over us.

Not really in the mood for folk tales right now, Paddy.

Why not? Because a German soldier is looking right at us.

So, there was a salmon

in the River Boyne, and it had

all the knowledge of the world

locked up inside its flesh and scales.

And a nobleman called Fineagas

spent seven years of his life

trying to catch this famous salmon,

with nets and hooks and the whole kit and caboodle.

We go soon.

Yes? And eventually, he caught the salmon

and gave it to his ragged-arsed little servant called Fionn Mac.

And he said, "You cook this frigging fish,

"but you do not..." Less than two minutes,

Paddy. "..you do not, you ragged-arsed little bastard,

"take a bite of it, or even taste

"the flesh, because the fish is mine

"and the knowledge is mine, and whoever tastes this fish first

"gains all the knowledge of the world."

If you're not careful, they will hear the bollocks you are talking,

and you are talking bollocks in English. So,

Fionn Mac, the servant, cooks the fish,

and to check that it's cooked,

he presses the flesh with his thumb.

IN GERMAN:

Waiting for the word, Paddy.

But the servant burns his thumb on the flesh of the fish,

so he sucks his burnt thumb

and, in doing so, he sucked the fat of the fish off it.

And so, all the knowledge of the world

went to the ragged-arsed servant, Fionn Mac.

Which is why, to this day,

babies suck their thumbs,

and poor people have all the answers.

We need to go now, Paddy.

Dead-on.

Grenade! Shit!

Move!

Turn around. On your knees.

Snell!

Get on the ground.

You're too young to smoke.

Get down!

Where the fuck is everybody?

Prisoners say the main German unit shipped out yesterday.

Perhaps they know something about this town we don't.

No, we got the place to ourselves, buddy.

Jimmy... HE WHISTLES

Cigarettes, nein.

Cigarettes? Aye, very funny.

The last man said that.

Mac, check the left.

Davey, hoist that there,

so our friends in the Royal Navy know that their services

are no longer required.

No looting!

Not until I give the word. Sir.

Right, listen in.

We'll rest here tonight.

Then, at first light, we press...

Slainte!

CHEERING Booze, food, no people.

..at first light, we press north to Cannizzaro to secure the Castello

rail head, as per our orders.

Cannizzaro will be defended, so go easy tonight.

Eat what food you can find.

We move out at 04:00,

so get some bloody sleep, for Christ's sakes.

EXPLOSIONS

Take cover.

Basement shelters, I'd say.

Keep your bleeding eyes peeled, all right?

Reggie, go take a wee look around.

Here.

Really, Paddy?

I just want to let those of you who might care

know that I have every intention

of taking every piece of gold,

silver and other valuables from this church for my own profit.

And if any of yous have a problem with that, then I will refrain

from giving you your share when I sell the stuff in Naples.

Paddy, for some of us, this is still the house of God.

Pope Pius XII is good friends with Mussolini

and has a direct line to Chancellor Hitler himself.

It's not God that's got my goat.

Putting your gun up there is bad luck, Paddy.

That thing there?

That's nothing but oak.

Christ is in here.

Paddy, you'd better come.

He speaks English, but not very well.

EXPLOSIONS

Father, it's me again.

"Father"?

No, no, no, no, no. Fuck that.

You are not my father.

You are a drunk, in a blanket,

who preaches before a flag I despise.

What are you doing hiding here,

and where is everybody else in this town?

They told everyone to leave

and they asked me to stay.

Paddy, what the fuck is the matter with you?! I don't think

he likes priests. Who asked you to stay?

The people who own this town.

IN ITALIAN:

English.

They wanted me to stay,

to give the American a message.

We are not American. Paddy... GUN CLICKS

Oh, for fuck's sake! What is your message?

They wanted me to stay to...to say that you are welcome,

that they want to help the Americans.

You call us American again, I'll fucking shoot you, right?

Who is your message from?

The message is from Cosa Nostra.

Paddy, in New York and Chicago, they're known as Mafia.

You've heard of Al Capone?

Well, they're worse.

They hate the Germans as much as us, so they could be useful.

It's the Mafia that owns this little town of Augusta.

So... We should be concerned?

Paddy, yeah, we should be cautious.

They want to sit down with you at the long table.

They want to break bread and drink wine.

They... They know things.

They see things.

They can help you in the mountains.

Er, you, you, you look like the boss.

Aye, right, I AM the boss.

Capo dei capi is the boss of the mountains.

This is his church.

He would like to meet you.

Right.

Well, you tell your Cosa Nostra,

Mafia, capo dei capi boss to stick his broken bread

and wine bottles up his fucking hole.

Bombardment seems to be over.

Right.

We'll be sleeping in here, in this house of God.

Considering this town is so poor,

didn't he build a nice, big fucking place for himself?

At precisely 4am,

I will be firing live rounds in here

to wake you fuckers up.

Does anybody have an issue with that?

You hurt things in here,

you hurt our hearts.

Fuck's sake!

How's your heart?

You know, sometimes, you're like a wee boy,

just seeing how far you can go.

Oh, I intend to go all the way to Berlin.

That's how far I can go.

Then I will ask for forgiveness.

Right now, I'm going to go for a walk,

see if I can't find me a bank.

CHATTER AND CHUCKLING

All right?

Shouldn't you at least have given that soldier a decent burial?

Had he been faster than me,

had he been more accurate than me,

had he been less afraid than me,

then he would have consigned me to the mercy of the crabs

and the eels and the worms just the same.

How did you get here? By dinghy.

Tried to get here in time for the fun and games.

Fun and games are in short supply.

We're expecting plenty tomorrow, though.

Cannizzaro.

Hmm. I'm sure you'll show up once the fighting is over.

Yes, Paddy, er, if you're not too tired, maybe we could sit down

with a glass of wine and discuss exactly why it is

that I've been sent here. Hmm?

Italy's most prestigious naval academy was located here.

I'm sure there are lots of very well-stocked wine cellars.

Unfortunately, I have a very early start in the morning.

We move out at four.

No, you don't, Paddy, you don't move out at four.

The attack on Cannizzaro's been postponed.

We're waiting for the Americans to make their landing

further up the coast, and that has been delayed.

"Postponed. Delayed".

I remember those words. This is a large-scale invasion, Paddy.

We must only move as part of a coordinated strategy.

So, what you're saying is

we have been stood down.

No. What I'm saying is

we hold our position in Augusta

and await further orders, like soldiers do in time of war.

If no-one gives me a war,

I tend to make a war of my own.

It is no-one's job to give you a war to fight,

a bone to chew, a body to kick.

'Tis with the bodies I belong.

By the way, Paddy, I'm now the ranking officer here,

which means that you can amuse yourself playing

the rebel injured peasant, which I know is your preferred pastime,

but the last word lies with me.

In Berlin...

..I will ask for forgiveness.

Just leave it by the door, please.

I have chocolates, cigarettes,

books...

..and messages from home.

You stopped my heart.

I can, I can feel you, so this isn't...a dream.

I was given permission by General de Gaulle himself.

The SOE run a network out of Switzerland.

They had Carmelite papers made for me.

I took a train from Geneva. SHE CHUCKLES

OK, um, when the sisters are here, guards patrol every five minutes.

Oh.

Enough time to say I love you. I love you.

Is that it? Is that the reason you came? Yes, and to make love.

What? How long now?

Four and a half. So we have time. Help me.

You mean the whole thing? "The whole thing" sounds very English!

HE CHUCKLES I mean, yes, the whole thing.

When we are back in England, we will always call sex "the whole thing".

We must do this efficiently. Yes, militarily.

This bloody dress is booby-trapped. They make these things complicated.

Designed to delay.

To prevent. But we are unstoppable.

I can't believe you took a train

from Geneva. Ow! Oh, Jesus! This is

the most insane construction.

David, also there's something I need to tell you. Shh...

I'll tell you afterwards. Oh, absolutely.

Afterwards.

HE GRUNTS

Right, OK.

Tell me what you have got to tell me.

The British have become worse since the Americans joined the war.

They're like a little private club and they tell us nothing.

So, David...

..I'm going to move closer to the front line.

I'm on my way there. I diverted to see you.

From here, I'm travelling on a Portuguese visa to Sicily.

The British and Americans are moving north,

to Cannizzaro, towards Palermo.

I'm planning to join your regiment, David.

Because they're always first anywhere, and they know me,

and I think they trust me.

At least, I will get as close to them as I can get.

You will join my brother, in Sicily.

You will join my brother, yes?

Yes, he's in command now. It will make things easier.

Oh, he is in command now, actually, because it was my idea.

I want you to write to him. In code, of course -

I'm sure you have a code -

and I want you to tell him to accept me and help me.

Everything for a reason. Always.

What? What reason?

Divert on a train to ask me to make an introduction

to my famously charming older brother,

so that he may serve the purpose that I once served,

while I sit here and read about it in letters from you both, hmm?

I never know when English people are joking.

Well, this Scottish person is certainly not joking.

Unless it is I, myself, who is the joke.

David, what the fuck are saying? He's your brother.

My older, calmer, more sophisticated brother.

And while I rot in my cell,

you will do whatever is necessary for the cause.

You fucking dare to talk to me like that! You fucking dare!

I must go.

Eve...

..I'm sorry.

VOICE OUTSIDE CELL: Andiamo!

OK.

Please, look, look at me.

I will write to him.

I will write to him.

I love you. Oh, God, I love you...

..and it fucking tortures me.

LOCK RATTLES

Il orario e scaduto.

Andiamo.

Aspetta!

Oh, God!

SHE SOBS

I will dig my way out of here like a dog...

..and I will be with you.

I swear I will.

BELL TOLLS

Cock-a-doodle-doo!

Cock-a-doodle-doo! CHUCKLING

Paddy has found a bell to ring.

He wants us all to gather.

We survived 4am.

How? Aye, er, we got stood down.

That's why he's hanging on a bell rope.

Like the lonely fucking hunchback he is inside his soul.

BELL CONTINUES TOLLING

BELL STOPS From now on, if you hear this bell,

that means I've had an idea...

..which mostly, for you, will be bad news,

because I am not in a good frame of mind,

and the only people for me to take my fury out on is you.

So, my ideas tend toward the devilish.

If you look across the square -

look there, that open doorway -

inside there is a foundry,

where invisible irons and shackles are being forged,

keeping us imprisoned in this wee fucking town.

And the officer who's perched by that doorway is the blacksmith

who forges those irons.

Paddy, what the fuck are you talking about?

Since we are stuck on this church-infested slab of a rock

for who knows how long, we will have to keep ourselves entertained.

I've already shot a cockerel, Paddy, and there's goats.

That is to say

you'll be free to entertain yourselves in the afternoons.

Because in the mornings, before it gets too hot,

we, the men of the Special Air Service, will train.

Ready for the moment when the great chain-makers,

and holders and keepers, and stand-us-DOWNERS,

are ready to put us once more back into the barrel

of the British crossbow and fire us into the heart of the enemy!

BELL RESTARTS TOLLING

Those of you paying attention will know by now that that means

I've had an idea. So, here is that idea.

Do you see yon mountain?

My idea is...we - the men of the SAS -

are going to climb said mountain.

Jesus Christ!

Now, this town is deserted, but the guide books say

you must take extra care of your valuables at all times.

So we will be gathering up all of our equipment,

and our pack, and our weapons,

and we will be carrying it all up the mountain with us, on our backs.

I suspect some of you will come to really dread

the tolling of the bell.

But fuck me, ring, it will -

until we are set free to be the beasts we are in the noble cause.

Right, we move in ten. No dicking about.

All right, you heard him. Move.

Paddy! Are you coming climbing with us?

I've received a complaint about your behaviour.

In the church. From the priest.

The priest who was drunk in a blanket when I woke him up.

You hung your machinegun on the shoulders of Christ.

You shot bullets inside the church.

Why did the drunken priest complain to you?

I thought he and I had established that I am the boss round here. Ah.

Perhaps he detected some indefinable air of a more ancient authority.

The crown and pips on my shoulder, and this...

..made him think he could confide in me.

You're not fighting in the desert any more, Paddy. You have to get

used to being around human beings.

My job is to take human beings and turn them into animals,

or turn them into food for animals.

Paddy, when you get back down the mountain,

there will be 150 new men here.

A whole new detachment is being deployed to Augusta.

They're coming here to be trained.

Now, the plan was that you would have been gone north by now

and there would have been no overlap or potential for friction.

Obviously, there will now be an overlap,

but there will be no need for friction.

Why would there be friction? Because you are you.

And because the new detachment...

..is called 2SAS.

The 2nd Special Air Service Regiment.

PADDY LAUGHS

Yes.

They're men chosen from the Commando units,

who fought in North Africa. Men chosen by me

to replicate your achievements and serve as backup.

So, the name SAS is stolen for your own use,

while the men who made it famous are hidden behind a more obscure title.

Yes, the universe is a conspiracy

against you, Paddy. No, the universe takes care of itself,

as far as I see. It's those less capable, but more fortunately born,

who seem to have an issue with me.

The new men have heard that you'll still be here in town

when they arrive and they're rather excited to see the originals.

"The originals". In actual fact, you are their heroes.

And it's you who is in command of this stolen regiment.

It was my brother, David, who recommended that I take command.

And the ragged-arse servant Finn Mac sucked his thumb...

..and said, "How do I just know that this is going to end badly?"

MUSIC: If the Kids Are United by Sham 69

We move!

Right, fall in.

Troop!

Troop!

Shun!

By the right, quick march!

Left, right, left, right,

left, right, left, right, left,

right, left, right, left.

# If the kids are united

# They will never be divided!

# If the kids are united

# They will never be divided!

# If the kids are united

# They will never be divided!

# If the kids are united

# They will never be divided!

# If the kids were united

# They would never be divided! #

Do not lay your packs down without my order.

We do not rest until we have achieved our goal.

Paddy, we've been up that fucking mountain

and we've come down that fucking mountain -

that WAS our goal. No!

Our goal was spiritual.

You may not think it,

but I took yous up that mountain for good fucking reason.

Our advance was postponed.

The Americans delayed us,

and the earth shook with my wrath!

So I led us all up the mountain,

and from the top, we looked across Italy.

And from our high viewpoint,

we realised that there is a greater strategy to which we are subordinate.

And in the cool mountain air,

didn't we accept that we are pawns

in a much bigger game?

And now, our fury has diminished. Yes?

ALL: Yes.

Thus, we have achieved our goal.

DONKEY BRAYS

Reg has found his missus!

LAUGHTER

My back was breaking, so I used my head.

Do you see this donkey?

This donkey represents the philosophy that

I am trying to instil in yous all.

Reggie, where did you find the cash to buy this beast?

From the collection tin in the church, sir.

Even fucking better!

Initiative, followed by initiative.

And the prize, one of nature's finest beasts.

"With monstrous head and sickening cry,

"and ears like errant wings.

"The devil's walking parody, on all four-footed things.

"The tattered outlaw of the earth, of ancient crooked will.

"Starve, scourge!

"Deride me: I am dumb..."

GLASS SMASHES

Fucking hell! Get down! Get down!

Fucker up there!

Fuck is that?! That was not a German carbine.

Nah, it's a shitty wee .22 rifle.

Fucking hell!

Get to fuck!

THEY CHUCKLE

BULLET WHIZZES

Riley!

What did he fucking say?

It's a quote!

A quote from who?

From you!

GUN FIRES

Educated guess,

I'd say we're sharing the beach

with the Sicilian Mafia.

Andiamo, ragazzi!

What the fuck is that?

Wait, Paddy! Leave it.

Look, if you shoot at it, we will make enemies we don't need to have.

Paddy, we're on the same side, for fuck's sake.

Have a look at the glasses, lad.

FIRES GUN TWICE

Ciao, Inglese!

Well...

..I don't know about the rest of you, but

this beach rather reminds me of Margate.

Fuck it.

I'm going for a dip.

Wa-hey-hey! Wa-ay!

By the way, Pad, they got away with my pack, so technically,

that is still my donkey.

WOLF-WHISTLING

Wa-ay! Ha-ha-ha!

I'm coming!

Smile, chaps!

To be so terrifically well-housed would almost be

something of an embarrassment for my men.

It's our wish to welcome you to Augusta.

Oh, thank you.

Here, allow me.

You are very different to the other one.

Yes, we are.

Very different. He has made enemies.

The town seems empty, but there are always eyes looking.

Well, he'll not be here much longer.

I've received new orders.

He and his men move out in the morning.

MACHINEGUN FIRE

Fuck! I'm looking for a man of the cloth.

And I am also looking for a stolen donkey.

Let's find that glass of wine and clear the air, shall we, Paddy?

That is them.

That is 2SAS.

That is who will come next. Aye, when 1SAS are laid to rest.

So there ARE people here. It's a very traditional island, Paddy.

There are sensitivities regarding women and soldiers.

That's why they emptied the town.

This town fits me like a vice around my skull,

and this priest here keeps turning the fucking handle.

I feel very much that you don't like me,

or don't like what I am,

or do not like God. All of the above,

apart from the last.

To peace. To peace.

To submission of the vanquished.

I'm told this morning, on the beach,

they could have taken your life twice.

They missed you on purpose.

It was a warning. They took some things that don't belong to them.

Paddy... CLEARS HIS THROAT

..Father Cavalli says they want to meet to talk.

Before we embark for Sicily, we were given an unofficial briefing.

We were encouraged to have our units make contact with,

and make use of, organised criminal elements on the island

of Sicily who were persecuted by Mussolini.

This is a conversation I no longer wish to continue with.

I am a soldier. And you're moving out tomorrow, Paddy. New orders.

No-one wants you in Augusta any longer than you have to be here.

Then I will go and begin to prepare my men.

Wait there!

Attention!

Stand to fucking attention, would you?!

I have been briefed to develop strategic ties with the Mafia

on this island. I am passing that briefing on to you

as a direct order. I think your new boys deserve a glass of water.

It's awfully hot down there.

Before you move out tomorrow, you will leave behind a legacy

of goodwill which the units who follow will take advantage of.

You will meet them and the Resistance.

You will break bread with them.

Tomorrow morning, before you pull out, you'll meet them for breakfast.

Ahh...

There is a long table that I will lay.

You will make peace, on behalf of the entire British Army.

That is an order.

But first, you will recover from the humiliating fact that

today, on a beach, they could have taken your life, but chose not to.

Twice.

Your friends have a donkey and a pack

that belongs to one of my men.

You have one hour to tie it to the railings of the Chiesa Madre church,

or I will come and take it back myself.

Nel nome del Padre e del Figlio e dello Spirito Santo.

Fucking langer.

DOOR CLOSES

And left... Shun!

And left... Shun!

Stand up...

East!

Parade...

Shun!

Would you like to inspect the men, sir?

They've got me bashing the square, sir.

Said they needed someone who knew what the bloody hell

they were doing. So they resorted to a spent old fucker like you?

Aye. Escaped a prison camp.

And in my relief and elation,

I foolishly volunteered.

But, Paddy, with respect.

Stand easy.

May I request that you do what you can

to get me the hell out of this unit?

You have no faith in the new incarnation?

Well, the issue, sir, is that everyone involved in

this new regiment is sane.

Completely sane. Aye, I can see how that would be hazardous.

They make considered decisions and proceed according to logic, sir.

It's quite unnerving.

I have to go and retrieve a stolen donkey,

and then have breakfast with the Mafia.

Of course.

But after, I'll do what I can.

Thanks, sir.

Parade... Shun!

Last time. I can't do it.

You can do it. Come on!

Get aggressive. Drive from your legs.

Come on.

Keep your back straight.

Lift, lift, lift, lift. I'm lifting.

See the legs? Look, look, look. Here. And, up!

Father!

Excuse me, Father.

Can I speak to you, please?

In private.

Come.

Come.

Thank you for this, Father.

BELL TOLLS

Thank you.

I'm, um...

..sorry, Father, I, I don't speak Italian.

I hope you can understand me.

God will understand.

What's your sin?

It can't be washed down with brandy or wine.

I know, cos I've tried.

SNIFFLES

I still hear the voices, Father.

What voices?

Help! Please! Stop the boat!

They're leaving us to drown!

There was men in the water and...and we could've saved them.

Please! Stop the boat!

I have a baby I've never seen!

Please, come back! Come back!

No!

We, we had room on our boats and, you know,

we just went past them and left 'em, like.

Why did you leave them?

We had orders, Father.

I still hear them orders when I try and sleep at night.

You know, "Do not slow down.

"Do not come to their aid."

Yeah, we all hear the voices at night, Father, you know.

I know that the other lads do as well, but, you know, none of us

talk to each other about it, like.

Oh, yeah, we can't force them out.

HE SOBS

You know, we killed them poor lads.

You know, we left them.

I rang the bell to signify that it is cocktail hour, Sergeant Kershaw.

You disturb the Sacrament of Penance.

"Beware ye of false priests who come to you in sheep's clothing,

"but inwardly are ravenous wolves."

Matthew, Chapter 5, Verse 15.

Thank you, Father.

BELL TOLLS

La colazione e servita!

Very nice.

Keep your weapons at hand, boys.

Riley, translate any whispers.

McDiarmid, get your feet off the fucking table.

VEHICLE APPROACHES

COCKS GUN

VEHICLE STOPS NEARBY

We are the Resistance.

Giustizia e Liberta Brigade.

From Syracuse and from the mountain.

Soldiers from the mountain.

OK.

We are the Special Air Service.

Beware of imitations.

Why don't you sit down?

We were told you invited others.

I was given orders to break bread with the Resistance

and the people known as the Cosa Nostra.

We are here, you are here...

But they are not here.

I rang the bell at eight. Perhaps their timekeeping is poor.

They always arrive before they are due. You work with them?

War blows you to strange places.

We're anarchists and communists.

They're scum. As are we, as a matter of fact.

We were told you are fighting together.

Until the war is over, we will fight beside them.

Then we will see them hang.

One big happy fucking family up there on the mountain!

Riley? Oh, the man in the fancy hat here smells a rat.

Hey, darlin'. You know I've killed

11 men since I last saw a woman.

Is that it, Jock?

Is that your romantic approach?

If you like, we can talk without them.

Paddy, listen... Why don't you take a seat?

Paddy! If they are coming to a rendezvous,

they always send children ahead to check.

Calm.

Why don't you have a fucking drink, hmm?

Riley? Man in the fancy hat says he doesn't trust the priest.

I may shake his hand.

HE COCKS GUN

Paddy, what the fuck is this?

Do you not hear that? Listen.

LOW RUMBLE, CUTLERY CLATTERS

Hey! Hey! Listen! Listen!

OVERHEAD DRONE

Incoming!

THEY ALL SHOUT

Fuck!

Jock! On me!

Go! One, two, three!

They'll come back around!

Take positions!

Right, Jock... Take cover!

Shit, shit, shit, shit!

PLANES QUIETEN

Here we go, hold! Hold.

Go!

Magazine in!

Loaded!

THEY ALL CHEER

Yes!

That Stuka is mine, huh? I claim it.

It's number eight for me.

You keep count?

I keep count.

Cosa Nostra have no real allegiances.

For them, everything is personal.

They gave you up to the Germans.

What did you do to offend them, huh?

Paddy, the lady asked you a question.

This breakfast was not my idea...

..but it has taught me a lesson.

Be selective about the orders that you obey.

Oh, that was close, man.

Where's that priest? He's gone.

Gone where?

North, across the front line.

And he's with the Germans. So, he set the breakfast table

and then called the Luftwaffe.

I smelt collaboration on his breath under the wine.

Your commanding officer saw only the crucifix. Well, then, you've

brought it on yourself, Paddy.

I heard about your behaviour in the church. About my what? My behaviour?

If you let loose your magazine in the desert, you kick up sand.

If you do it here, people are watching.

And God is watching.

Look, you don't even hate.

Not really. You just... You get mad and then you squeeze the trigger.

And then you make other people mad to make your madness seem all right.

Jesus Christ, Jimmy, that's fucking...

Speaking as someone who doesn't usually give a toss,

you have to change, Paddy.

Someone has to make you change.

Be it God, or me...

..or the ghost of that Catholic boy

that you left buried in the desert.

I wish to speak with the Colonel

who ordered me and my men into a deathtrap.

Hand that to Greville-Bell. Dismissed. Yes, sir.

My order to you to break bread with people who had

bad intentions was the result of a misjudgment on my part.

I trusted Father Cavalli. I was wrong.

You were right. I apologise.

I will accept your apology on one condition. Ah!

I would like to request that Staff Sergeant Almonds

is transferred to join my detachment.

Paddy, after the attack on Cannizzaro, you will embark

for the mainland, where part of our mission is about hearts and minds...

I need a man with Staff Sergeant Almonds' specific capabilities.

Paddy, engage with what I'm saying. I am engaging.

Staff Sergeant Almonds is a religious man himself.

Perhaps he might be able to advise me with regards to my behaviour.

Oh. Even just now, he and I exchanged a few words,

and I am already considering those words.

His advice to me is that I must change.

You see, the problem with you, Paddy, as well as everything else -

the good and the bad - is that you are very, very smart.

I suck my thumb, you see, sir.

You use your deplorable behaviour on this island

as an argument for stealing away one of my best men.

No, it's the name of the SAS that has been stolen.

Request denied, Major Paddy Mayne.

Now, you have one hour to gather your troops

and fuck off north to Cannizzaro,

where the Germans, the Italians and, most likely, the Sicilian Mafia

will be waiting for you.

Oh, I'd say one hour is more than enough time for us

to organise our withdrawal from this pretty wee seaside town

which, in many ways, reminds me so much of home.

Sir.

Gosh.

Very good.

Woo-ho-ho-ho-ho!

LAUGHTER

This is Fascist Government money, lads, remember that.

Fill your nets.

No pasaran, eh, Pad? Go on by.

OK, roll up, roll up!

Paddy! I thought the Resistenza

made us all look a wee bit pedestrian...

LAUGHTER ..so help your fucking selves, like.

I, er, gave the donkey the Freedom of the City,

and we left the churches alone, Paddy, as per your orders.

Not my fucking orders.

That man's orders.

What did you tell your CO?

I told him that if he let me go...

..that I would take charge of Paddy Mayne's mortal soul

till the day we reach Berlin.

Shook me hand and wished me luck.

Reg.

Johnny.

HE WHISTLES

Men of the SAS -

known to the uninitiated as the SRS -

can I invite you to welcome back my good friend,

my conscience and my voice of reason?

Staff Sergeant Jimmy Almonds!

THEY CHEER

Hey, good man.

Cheers, lads.

MUSIC: Counting The Beat by The Swingers

Give me those field glasses, will you?

Yeah.

# I look into your eyes

# Don't know where to turn

# I'm gonna drift into that void

# I'm flying through space, I'm an asteroid... #

Oh, David!

# ..Time doesn't take place when you're paranoid

# I'm thinking 'bout you and nothing else

# Think about you, you think about me

# Thinking 'bout you, I'm counting the beat

# I'm thinking about you

# I'm thinking about me

# I'm thinking about just you and me

# La-dah-de-de, there ain't no place I'd rather be

# La-da-de-da, la-da-de-da

# La-da-de-da, la-da-de-da

# La-da-de-da, la-da-de-da

# La-da-de-da, la-da-de-da

# La-da-de-da, la-da-de-da

# La-da-de-da, la-da-de-da

# Uh-uh-oh, uh-uh-uh-uh-oh

# I'm bleeding to death

# On a cloudless day

# A three-four heartbeat... #