Original subtitles

[Kourtney] There's so much traffic in this city.

[Scott] It's five o'clock, it's rush hour.

-[Kourtney] Oh, it's rush hour, yeah. -[cell phone rings]

[Kim] Hey babe!

About to pick up my Bentley.

-[Scott] Oooh! -[Khlo� mimicking] Bentley.

So my Bentley is finally ready

it's taken forever

to get the rims hooked up and to do everything.

[Khlo�] So, Kim, what'd you do to your car?

Black on black on black with like red stitching, red B's,

it's just all blacked out.

Ay caramba!

I've worked very hard for this car.

Since I've been 12 years old, it's been my dream to get a Bentley.

This is gonna be the new sleek look, get rid of the pink.

And I've given it my all to make this dream come true.

So I wanna share it with Khlo� and Kourtney

and then we're on our way to see Rob.

I wanna drive all around town.

And just... I'm so excited.

We're almost there.

I'm gonna be riding around in my new Bentley!

[Kourtney] Oh, OK, Kim!

[Kourtney] Kim said Bentley about 25 times.

[Khlo�] We know you're getting a Bentley.

[Bruce] All right, we're ready.

No, no, no, you're right here.

The wind, you guys... is this necessary?

Go change. Awful.

No, that is not cute.

[man] Yeah, yeah, go on!

Yeah, I need someone to make me laugh.

Where's Kim?

[Khlo�] Kim is always late.

I'm here.

[Kourtney] Get out of our way!

[Kim] Stop! Jealous?

-[Bruce] Stop! -[Kris] That's enough.

[man 1] All right, you guys.

-[man 2] That's it! We're done. -[man 3] Money.

Brandon!

-Bruce! -Hey,

the guys, Burt!

You know, my two boys Burt and Brandon,

are my older sons

that I had before I met Kris.

All right, the studio.

-How the music business? -Excellent.

Do you have enough buttons?

You know, Brandon's like my age when I won the Games

and it's fun to see him with all his little toys.

We got your little hot rod here. Your Porsche a killer?

Yeah, it's, it'll take anything down.

When I was his age there was nobody in the world

that had more toys than me. At one time I had three airplanes,

hobie cats, cars, snowmobiles, jet skis, wind surfers.

I mean I had it all!

And then I met Kris and picked up ten kids.

[chuckles] It's all gone.

I had so many toys, it was a joke.

So what's the deal here? When are we getting a little hot car?

-Something to have fun in. -I'm a car...

I'm a car pool guy.

I car pool for a living. That's what I do.

I certainly miss the airplanes,

yeah my old motorcycle, miss that.

But, you know, it's not like I really need it.

[Bruce] * All I do is carpool *

* Yeah *

* And it ain't no fun *

[all] Yeah!

* Kendall and Kylie *

* In the backseat *

* Asking questions *

[high pitched] Are we there yet?

[normal voice] And I did that without one beer!

-Props from me, I'll tell you what! -That's right!

Props from me.

All right, come on, let's go shoot some pool!

[revs engine]

[upbeat music plays]

* I'm *

* I'm livin' the dream *

* The dream, the dream *

* All I could want is right here waiting *

* Whenever I realize... *

[brakes screech]

My car is not ready.

No more than ten minutes. I promise you it's gonna be done.

They're putting on the last thing.

The guy keeps telling us it'll be 15 minutes.

Fifteen minutes later he comes back, "It'll be fifteen more minutes."

How much longer though?

-'Cause we have to be out- -[Scott] Fifteen minutes?

-Ten minutes? -15 more minutes, ten more minutes.

It's taken forever to get my car

and as we're waiting, I hear Kourtney and Khlo� screaming.

I don't know what they're doing, this is my business deal.

You're yelling at her, telling her $35,000!

I said you're wasting everybody's time and money

by having us sit here.

Don't [bleep] with us. Tell us what's going on.

And he said, "Baby, talk about wasting money

I've put $35,000 into this car for free!"

[Khlo�] I don't care a [bleep] how much your car cost

'cause it's not about me

and he agreed to do something

so he shouldn't be throwing it in your face.

If you say you're going to do something, then do it!

So Khlo� starts giving him an attitude, the guy yells at Khlo�

and Kim doesn't defend her.

It's rude and it's making me look bad so stop.

Khlo� and Kourtney are so rude to Chris,

the guy who owns the dealership.

I am just so appalled

that they are speaking to me like this and to the car guy like this.

[Scott] What's wrong with you?

Oh, my God, the guy's doing you a favor.

Stop and go get in the car and stop being rude and a brat

-it's not funny. -I will never look at you the same.

-...talk... He didn't talk... -[Khlo�] You're my sister!

You're my sister, Kim!

[Kourtney] I think you're so gross. All you care about is money.

[Kim] All I care about is money? He has my [bleep] $220,000 car!

Who cares?

You're such a [bleep] kiss ass, you're so not family orientated.

-See you, sweetheart! -Psycho.

[Khlo� yells] No loyalty!

[Kim] You're gonna act like this? Like, you [bleep] little immature bitch!

-Leave! -Ooh!

We don't care, bye!

Then stop acting so immature, then leave get out of here!

-This isn't your place! -[Khlo�] I would if I could, sweetheart

I have no reason to see you get a Bentley.

Now I know about my sister!

You are so jealous!

You are just so jealous that you cannot get a Bentley

and you're trying to ruin my moment for me.

Are you joking?

So get away you jealous, psycho bitch!

[Kourtney] They don't want to be here anymore, let's go.

They think it's funny, they think it's a joke

-and it's not. -[cell phone ringing]

-[Kris] Hello? -[Kim] Hey, Mom, can I talk to you?

I hate my sisters.

They are so rude

you have no idea how much they humiliated me tonight.

I never want to look at their ugly faces again.

-[Khlo�] Rob! -What?

-Kourtney and I... -[Rob] I cannot handle this right now.

Just got in the biggest fight with Kim.

[Kim] Even though there's been so much fighting, so much arguing,

at this point I don't care who's fault it is.

I need to make it right.

[Khlo�] We went to the car dealership for her

all the way from Beverly Hills to North Hollywood.

Yeah!

You're kissing this guy's ass to get your car fixed

instead of caring about us.

Like my feelings are really hurt that she let some loser yell at me!

[mimicking Kim] Like, talk to my sisters like that,

I don't care about these bitches!

Like, Kim doesn't say anything.

Kim doesn't give a [bleep] because people control her,

because she's a [bleep] weak duck.

Kourtney and I are strong queens

and we don't deal with the [bleep] princess.

No, but she's letting this guy talk to her,

letting him do it two months late.

No, but also...

Don't be [bleep] rude!

[Kourtney] Are you kidding me?

-I swear to God, -Stop!

-Don't be [bleep] throwing thing on me! -What are you doing?

I'll [bleep] hurt you!

-Don't do that! -Oh, my God, stop!

[Kourtney] Please. Get out!

I open the door and Khlo� slams the door right in my face...

and it infuriates me

like, I literally wanna kill her.

Don't be [bleep] rude and throw the thing on me!

I'll [bleep] hurt you!

I'm so angry.

[Kim] No! You're talking [bleep] about me already!

-Try to slam the door in my face! -Get out! Yes we're talking about you!

-[Khlo�] You're a horrible individual! -[Rob] Oh, no, no, no.

-[Kourtney] Get out! You're not wanted! -[Rob] This is my place.

I've never really seen my sisters fight like this.

[Khlo�] Oh, go cry 'cause no one wants you!

Khlo� and Kourtney are saying like,

nasty names about Kim.

[Khlo�] She doesn't care about our feelings.

You need to leave.

-I'm leaving! -[Khlo�] Thanks for leaving.

Go with your Bentley that no one could afford!

We don't want your Bentley!

[Kim crying] No, they're rude

and she tried to slam the door in my face...

-Don't leave, Kim! -I just wanna go,

I just wanna go.

Look she's crying, do you hear her crying?

Like we care, I don't give a [bleep].

She hurt my feelings so badly.

-Kim, stop! -I'm leaving.

Everybody's picking on her.

-Are you really leaving? -[Kim] I'm really leaving.

[Rob] Khlo� and Kourtney are being really mean.

She hit me really hard

but because I'm a bigger girl, I know not to hit her

because I will really like,

give her a concussion and that's not...

I'm not trying to hurt my sister.

Kim is taking this situation way too far

we don't get physical with each other

and there's no need to get physical about this.

-Kim, you're being stupid right now. -No, I'm not.

I'm not gonna take them all ganging up on me

and being mean over what?

Over the fact that I bought a new car?

I wish I punched her harder.

[Khlo�] Ohh, the little baby.

I hate her.

What are you saying? She's your sister!

My sister just hit me, OK?

-[cell phone ringing] -[Kourtney] OK, this is mom.

-Hello? -[Kris] Khlo�, what is wrong with you?

A lot.

Why are you being so mean and vicious?

This is like you're in a playground!

Kris, you weren't there and you know what?

Just because she gives you ten percent, you're gonna kiss her ass!

You're supposed to be supportive and loving of one another,

this has gone a little too far and I'm done.

But you weren't there and we're just venting

and you definitely like Kim more.

Just because I don't show emotion easily

or as easy as Kim does

my feelings are still hurt

and why are you picking anybody's side?

This has nothing to do with you.

-Hey! -Sexy woman.

Come here.

So with all the drama happening with Kim and Khlo�,

I'm really feeling stressed out and like,

I need to get out and go have some fun with one of my girlfriends.

This is so great.

So I call my girlfriend Ellen K.

Then Ellen and I are gonna blow off some steam.

[both] Cheers!

To the girls! They're all driving me nuts.

I'm ready to lose my mind.

-[waitress] Would you like another one? -Yes please.

[laughs]

-I love it! -Whoo!

If you can't beat 'em, join 'em!

[both laughing]

[Kris] Let's get a couple of shots.

Shots?

[both] Oh, my God.

Shaky, shaky, shaky.

Licky, licky.

You're hilarious.

Chug it, doll.

-Here's to us! -And to us!

[glasses clink]

It's been a while since I've been out for a drink with a girlfriend.

So I get a little crazy

and a little out of control and I do something really silly.

[Ellen] Oh, my God!

I'll wait for you in the car.

No, you're going first, doll.

Oh, my!

Hello?

-Hi? -[man] Hi, can I help you?

Yeah.

-I think we want tattoos? -[man] OK.

Ellen says she's always wanted to get a tattoo

of her son's name somewhere.

Like, right here...

or right here,

or just on her ass.

I'd go with the ass.

[laughs]

And I'm thinking, "Oh, my God, I'm so in love with this idea."

But my problem is, I have like, 32 children.

So how do you put everybody's name on your body?

You don't.

And, you know what?

I'm not so happy with the older kids right now.

So Kendall and Kylie get names

and Kim and Kourtney and Khlo� don't.

[man] Who's gonna go first?

-Oh, she is. -She's going first.

[machine buzzing]

Oh, come here, let me smell.

[both laugh]

Just a little smell, that... [Ellen] You're a pervert.

Come here. [laughs]

Oh, God.

-[man] Take a few minutes. -I need a hug.

I shouldn't necessarily be having

tattoos done at this age.

This sounded like a good idea after a couple of shots.

But you know what, I love it.

It's really cute. The girls will love it.

[Ellen] It looks really good.

That's all that matters.

-[Ellen] Bye. -[Kris] All right, bye.

-[Ellen] See you later. -[Kris] Thanks again.

-[Ellen] This is an unforgettable night. -[Kris] It is.

[Ellen] I'm gonna kill that guy with the needle.

[Bruce] Here's what my life's come to,

in the old days, I used to fly big helicopters

now I'm down to...

my little toy helicopter.

Eh-eh, come on, come on. Keep coming around.

Bruce has been flying that helicopter all afternoon

and he's acting like a little kid.

And it's driving me nuts!

Hey, do you like the tat?

[Khlo�] Are you joking?

[Kris] Isn't it great?

You look cute Khlo�.

Why are you being so nice to me all over sudden?

'Cause you're fabulous.

No, you were mean to me earlier.

So I really don't like you very much at the moment.

Khlo�, I wasn't mean to you earlier.

You heard Kimberly's side of the story

and you just went and...

jumped on being on Kim's side

and you're defending Kim and you're blaming it on me

and saying that this was all my fault.

I don't like it as a mom

when three of my children are up against one.

I'm sure I don't like it either.

-OK? -I don't like it either.

If it was you against the other three,

I would have felt the same way.

Even if you think I am a liar

and you don't believe anything I say.

You're the mom don't admit that.

Don't let us know whose side you're picking

'cause it hurts other people's feelings that's all I was saying.

[Kris] I didn't mean to hurt your feelings, Khlo�.

-OK. -[Kris] I love you...

-[Bruce] What is going on? -[Kris] She's upset

because I took Kim's side last night.

[Khlo�] No, Kourtney...

I don't take anybody's side, just everybody chill out.

-And they were all against... -Everybody's at fault.

[whirring]

[Kris] Get that thing away from me!

[Bruce] Coming in for the landing.

[Kris] I hope it crashes.

[chirping]

Normally when we fight, it's over in a couple minutes

but this fight was a little more intense than most fights.

So we all decide to go meet at this coffee shop

and just kind of talk things out.

Why don't you get off your phone and give us a little bit of attention

and tell us how you feel.

I feel that yes,

it's so annoying that my car was late, that it wasn't ready.

You told me it was gonna be ready.

However, you...

both embarrassed me

and were so rude to me.

When it's a business deal.

And, um, I did not pay whatever I paid for that car

to not leave without my car.

None of us said to leave...

We never said leave without your car.

I think we were wrong for saying that in front of him.

However,

that guy was wrong, how he talked down to me.

That's not OK with me and it shouldn't be OK with you.

No, he also helped me, 'cause it's really hard

to get in a car that expensive.

I'm not budging because I didn't do anything wrong.

I don't see it.

I never will see it and this is pointless.

[Khlo�] I don't even care, you're right in your mind.

So you're never gonna be wrong 'cause you never bend.

-You never apologize. -I always, oh, I completely do.

I can't let it bother me anymore. I'm in a different place.

[Kim] And I feel the same way that I need to let you guys

out of my life a little bit

and go live my own life.

I don't wanna work as closely.

And I just think I need to separate myself.

[Kim] Maybe we work too much together,

we play together, we do everything together.

And I think that maybe I need to step back

and do some things on my own.

I just... I think maybe in the long run, it'll be better for us.

[Khlo�] This conversation is not going any which way

I thought it was gonna go.

The conversation starts turning into something so petty

and so about business like,

[bleep] business.

This is about us as a family.

This is not how we were raised.

-No, it's disappointing... -[Khlo�] No, Kim acts...

I'm not acting like anything, Khlo�. I came here...

[Khlo�] You don't have a sense of loyalty and it shocks me.

[Kim] I really don't think that you guys see.

[Kourtney] I said where I thought I was wrong.

-And I agree with you. -And I said where...

-But I don't think that I was wrong. -You don't think you were wrong at all.

[Kim] By getting my Bentley.

If you think that's what we're mad at, you're wrong.

Tell me how I'm wrong?

Figure it out for yourself.

[Kourtney] Our conversation is over

and I don't really feel like it went anywhere

because Kim can't admit

anything that she's done is wrong.

Hey!

Why are you crying?

[Khlo�] This conversation was supposed to make us stronger

And not like more distant from each other.

And I don't want us to change our love

and our relationships with each other.

Khlo� is just really upset about it and wants us all to get along.

[Khlo�] We had a fight, like, let's get over it.

Khlo� is definitely the most sensitive one

out of all of us, she just doesn't act like it.

I don't like that she's like,

"Well, then all I'm gonna do is work with you."

[Kourtney] She's just saying that to try and just piss you off.

It doesn't piss me off, it makes me sad

because dad would never let any of this happen

and this is not what we're supposed to be doing.

I'm trying to help her but if she doesn't wanna help, what am I gonna do?

I can't force her if she wants to,

you know, listen, then that's her decision.

All you can do is say something.

[Kris on the phone] Hey, Kim! What's up?

I want... I'm just so upset.

Kourtney and Khlo� are just like,

so mean to me.

I really have not heard my kids fight like this since they were toddlers.

So I don't wanna talk to them and I'm not gonna talk to them,

I've had it with them.

The whole thing is ridiculous.

These kids need to grow up.

Oh, my God, I really don't get this.

Like it's been a couple days, she hasn't called and apologized.

[Kris] Maybe she feels like you owe her one.

[Khlo�] Too bad.

Well, no, not too bad.

You know what, Khlo�, bye-bye.

No, I don't want to listen to it anymore, I'm done being the mediator.

[Khlo�] OK.

Done, ugh!

-Honey? -[Bruce] What?

Why did we have so many children?

It was all your idea.

Hey, honey, what do you think?

Should I go with bangs or no bangs?

Only back in the 70s I wore it with bangs.

-Bangs? -Bangs, you're saying bangs or no bangs?

Too much forehead, what do you think?

Look a little younger.

-You know, a little... -[finger snap]

You're freaking me out... That's annoying.

Don't move like that it freaks me out.

It's bad enough that the girls are fighting

but now I think Bruce has lost his mind.

Don't, don't, don't try to dance, stop!

The hair, the toys, wanting to be hip.

What?

I think Bruce is going through a mid-life crisis.

Why are we talking about your hair

when I really need you to focus on my girls?

Are they complaining about their Bentley?

-Uh, kind of, yeah. -[Bruce] Yeah,

that's what I thought. Maybe they shouldn't have Bentleys.

I agree, but they're 27 years old.

When was the last time you told a 27 year old

-what to do and they actually did it? -[laughs]

Maybe we should do what we did when they were kids.

Take them all snow skiing,

instead of all the tension around here

let's just go skiing for three or four days.

Wait...

Because the girls are all good skiers.

Is it about the girls or is this about you?

Good question.

-[laughs] -Uh...

Do you wanna go skiing?

Well it's a good excuse for everybody.

When everybody's stressed out, everyone's fighting.

You know what, a family vacation may be just the ticket.

-Breckenridge, Colorado has a golf course. -[laughs]

-I know there's a golf course... -I know, but I thought...

But it's middle of the winter, honey, we're not gonna be playing golf,

we're going there to go skiing, but I appreciate that.

[Kris] And then they have Breckenridge.com also.

Which is the ski area?

[Kris] Mm-hmm.

[Bruce] Ski schools all that, cool.

Let's go to Breckenridge. I love it!

-Honey, can you toss the salad? -How about those two,

-do you wanna do it with those? -Fine, it's fabulous.

When my mom mentions that we're going on a family vacation,

I'm thrilled.

But I really don't wanna sit next to Kim.

I don't wanna sleep next to Kim, and I don't wanna eat next to Kim.

I just think you should just be a little bit extra sensitive with Kim.

OK, Mom!

OK!

I'd rather keep my distance and not have another argument with her.

[Bruce] Are you gonna use that entire thing?

[Khlo�] Yes, and I use an entire thing of butter

that's why this is so good for you.

-Yeah. -And this won't give us cellulite.

[Bruce] Good thing Kimberly's working tonight.

Why?

[Bruce] She won't have to get the cellulite.

Kim has enough to last her a lifetime.

[woman on PA] Do not leave your baggage unattended.

Please report all unattended baggage to law enforcement officers...

I don't want to even go on this trip. I'm not even talking to them at all.

They're so rude.

-I completely agree with her. -Completely embarrassed me.

This friction between you guys and the tension has got to quit.

It really has.

You guys have got to learn how to get along because if you don't...

-[Kourtney] There's no tension. -Yeah, there is.

No, there's not. We're just not talking to Kim,

-there's no tension. -That's tension and that's...

We're just not talking to her, it's fine.

-No, it's not fine. -OK.

[Kourtney] My mom thinks that she can

still try to make us

kiss and make up when she wants us to

but that's just not how we feel.

I don't wanna sit next to Kim, so make sure you're sitting next me.

You're talking to the enemy?

What?

The enemy.

I don't think that it's fair that I'm forced to go on this trip.

I don't feel like being with them.

I don't feel like talking to them.

I don't feel like spending time with them.

I don't feel like laughing, skiing,

and snowboarding with them.

I think we need time apart.

[Captain] This is your captain speaking.

We're experiencing some turbulence, so, if you can return to your seats

and fasten your seat belts, thank you.

[Kris] Next time on Keeping Up with the Kardashians...

People that can't afford Bentleys ride this car.

-I would rather not be here! -Then go!

-I don't wanna be in the cold. -Or we can just take these little things

-and maybe throw them away. -[Bruce] Hey!

Why did you do that mom? Let's see if yours work.

-[Khlo�] Oh, my God! -[Bruce] Why don't you just go home?

It's not funny.

Get out if you're gonna continue to laugh and make fun of me.